Chapter Text
Contrary to popular belief, Izuku's favorite color is not red.
Honestly, red only brings reminders of things gone wrong. Of shoes special-made to accommodate the extra toe joint his pinky holds. Of the eyes of his tormentor, who beats him daily in what should be a safe space to learn. Of the dying flames from loud explosions coming from sweaty palms. Of injuries left hidden from his own mother. So, it is safe to say, red is one of his least favorite colors.
The next logical step is to assume his favorite color is green. After all, it seems his whole family's steeped in it. You would be close, green is a close second, bringing reminders of family, of kindness when no one else would. Of the small ivy plant he waters every Friday before he heads to school, or the color of his mother's hair as she leans in to give him a kiss on the forehead and a few stray strands fall in his face. But no, despite this, green isn't his favorite.
Blue is his favorite color. It reminds him of his favorite thing in the world: the sea. He doesn't get to go to the sea often, but since the first time he went when he was four, it quickly became his favorite thing in the world.
"Mama, Mama! Look at me!" Izuku kept gathering wet sand in the bucket he carried. He kept dumping it down on the shallow tide, trying to make a sandcastle surrounded by the water. Of course, this failed, the water quickly slamming into the pitiful pile of sand and washing it out into its depths. Izuku tries again.
"Oh, sweetie. The water's just going to keep eating your castle that way! You have to make it away from the ocean so it can't chomp down on your kingdom." Inko kneels down beside Izuku, ruffling his hair and giving him a quick kiss on the forehead. She motions her arms up; asking her toddler if he wants to be picked up in a wordless question. He shakes his head.
"But I wanna stay in the sea! I like it here. It's my friend!" Izuku laughs. "If it's hungry, it can have my king.. kingdoms!" He struggles with the last word. He continues to fill the bucket and dump it out in the water. Inko just smiles.
Today's one of the rare times he's at the ocean, though he senses those times will become a bit more common. While trying to outrun his bullies, he stumbled upon Dagobah Municipal Beach Park. He's always known it was here, of course, but he's never given it any thought until realizing how great it is to hide from people chasing you. The smell usually drives most people away.
If he pays enough attention, Izuku can see a small 'animal trail' of sorts through the trash. Probably left by people who scavenge for parts or come here for sketchy meetings. It leads to a small clearing, right by the ocean shore. Izuku takes a deep breath in, and if he makes a conscious effort to ignore the smell of trash and rot, he can smell the salty scent of the sea. After scanning the sand for any pieces of sharp metal or needles, he slides his shoes off, then his socks. He rolls up the cuffs of his pants and steps into the water.
He doesn't know how long he's spent at Dagobah. He's moved from standing to sitting on the dry sand, but letting his feet stay close enough to the water to stay wet. The sun's starting to lower in the sky- but not quite sunset- and his phone's ringing up a storm in his pocket. He answers; it's his mother.
"Izuku, where are you honey? I'm so worried! It's almost dinner and you're normally back a couple hours ago! I'm just trying to make sure you're safe, I- '' Izuku cuts her off after it's clear she's going to start a patented Midoryia ramble.
"I'm fine, Mom! You know that beach about six blocks away from that triangular park, up the road from the school? Yeah, the one people use as a garbage dump. I've been hanging out there; I wanted to hang out at the sea, but our usual beach is too crowded, so…"
"...As long as you're staying safe, that's all that matters. However, I do want you to come home. Do you want me to pick you up, or do you want to walk home?"
Izuku walks home.
Izuku's face is slammed into a toilet.
He hears a 'Bonk!' As his forehead hits the inside of the toilet bowl and feels an immediate blooming of pain, and a warmth that's probably blood, but that's not his current problem. They've shoved both his nose and mouth in the water. He can't inhale.
He squirms and flails wildly and holds his breath. I should probably calm down. He thinks; haven't I read somewhere panicking makes you run out of breath quicker? But his body doesn't listen to his thoughts. There's a weird disconnect. His thoughts are slow, calm, clear. But his body is wired. Full of panic and flight.
The bullies jeer above him while all he sees is the porcelain of the toilet get stained with his own blood. "Look at the Primordial fighting, like it thinks it can actually beat us!" And "The Quirkless kid is so pathetic. He can't even handle a little water." Get delivered to his ears while he struggles to keep his breath in him and the water out of his lungs.
But what after feels like forever (And in reality is just a minute) he has to breathe. When he does, he gets the taste of water on his tongue, traveling up his throat, lodging itself in his lungs. He tries to cough it out, but this just makes him inhale more water, making a repeating cycle of spasms.
To the bullies, Izuku suddenly stops struggling. He's silent. The bullies start to feel a sense of dread. The lead one quickly pulls Izuku's head out of the toilet and all three sprint out of the bathroom, all afraid of the possible.
There's blackness.
Then Izuku's eyes are shooting open, light flooding his vision, his chest spasming painfully as he coughs up the mouthfuls of water he swallowed. He lays there on the bathroom floor. He lets the cold seep into his skin, his bones.
Eventually, he gets up.
Time passes after that. A year, maybe three. The bullying worsens. Others tell him to kill himself- but Kacchan never crosses that line. Until now.
It's raining when ̶K̶a̶c̶c̶h̶a̶n̶ ̶K̶a̶t̶s̶u̶k̶i̶ Bakugou first tells him to kill himself.
He starts the class with his head on the desk. He has a headache from getting his head slammed into a locker this morning. He's pretty sure it's nothing serious like a concussion, but it still hurts and the lights just make it worse. It's quite possible the injury triggered a minor migraine, or something.
The teacher had made the class fill out future review forums a couple days ago, and today they were to discuss them. Izuku knew he was going to be painting a target on his back by writing U.A. in his, but he was hoping for a small mercy that day that, in the future, the teacher wouldn't go over them publicly with the class. It had just felt rotten to lie at the time about his lifelong dream, even if it was on a silly and small thing like homework. It had come to bite him in the butt, it seems.
"...Now, it's time to review your papers… is what I should say, if I didn't already know the answer." He swiped the papers off his desk in one grand motion. He would most likely make Izuku pick that up before the next class. "You all want to become Heros!"
The class cheered and Izuku sensed the class start to flourish their quirks around. Bakugou almost exploded a fly while doing so. Finger-kun, who Izuku didn't quite know the name of, accidentally poked someone on the neck.
"Bakugou" The blonde in question perks up from being mentioned "In particular, wants to be a Hero! He's even going to go UA. Right, Bakugou?" The teacher says, in that tone that people use when they think they're doing something sly. The hair on the back of Izuku's neck prickles.
Bakugou slams his hand down on the desk, letting out an explosion big enough to charr the desk. "HELL YEAH, I AM! IM GOING TO BE THE NUMBER-FUCKING-ONE HERO AND GET MORE MONEY THAN ANY OF YOU SHITHEADS EVER WILL!" He roars triumphantly.
Izuku feels the teacher's gaze turn to him. The pitter-patter of the rain on the window grows louder. Izuku swears he can somehow smell the rain inside the classroom.
"Izuku, you put UA on your future Highschool plans, did you also?" Note the absence of 'going to UA' like with Bakugou Is all Izuku thought before the jeers broke out.
Izuku drowned out the taunts with the pitter-patter of the rain. Then there's smoke in his face, and a loud boom echoing in his ears. Bakugou slammed his hand on the surface of Izuku's desk, looming over where Izuku sat. The teacher pretends to be busy on his phone.
"Shitty DEKU. WHY ARE YOU STILL TRYING TO GET INTO UA?" He snarls, grabbing a fistful of the front of Izuku's uniform and holding him somewhat out of his seat. Izuku gently, shakely, wraps his hand around Bakugou's wrist and tries to make a nervous smile.
"I j-just thought i-i should g-give it a s-shot?" He stammers. He's slammed forward, onto his desk. He scrambles to push himself upward but a palm is slammed down beside his face, face-down. A warning to stay put.
"YOU THINK YOU CAN JUST 'GIVE IT A SHOT'? WHAT, ARE YA' GOING TO FUCKIN' STUMBLE IN UA AND JUST SEE HOW IT WORKS OUT? A QUIRKLESS LOSER LIKE YOU THINK YOU CAN JUST FUCKING DO THAT?" He shouts. He's going to say more- do more- but the bell rings. Izuku bolts upwards. They lock eyes.
Bakugou's stare promises a chase. A hunt.
Izuku gathers his stuff and bolts out the door, Bakugou close behind. Izuku’s just barely faster at getting his shoes on. He doesn't grab the umbrella, that would make him slower, and when he opens the doors he's immediately pelted with the rain.
They chase after each other in the rain. Izuku's cold to the bone, face wet. Their feet make a steady rhythm of 'Thump, Thump' on the concrete, making little splashes as they step.
Then Izuku trips.
Bakugou quickly, roughly, drags him into the closest ally. Izuku bolts up once he's let go of, but Bakugou slams him into the wall.
"Don't try for UA, Deku." Is all he says. He waits.
"OK, Bakugou." He responds. Eyes light up in a rage and teeth are bared in a snarl. He's said something wrong.
"WHAT DID YOU CALL ME?" Bakugou screams in Izuku's face, raising his hand from where he's pinned Izuku and slamming it back down on the brick wall with a boom.
"I-I called you Bakugou." Izuku mumbles, slouching away the best he can in this situation.
"Where'd that cutesy nickname go, huh?" His voice is no longer yelling, but still laced with anger and jeer. "You think you're better than me now? Too grown up now? Think you're anything other than a shitty worthless and quirkless baby?" Izuku tries to stammer a response, but Bakugou continues talking.
"You know what, Deku ?" He stresses the nickname. "You need to realize you're not going to go anywhere in life. We both know the shitty statistics involving your kind. You'll be lucky if you even get a fucking job at McDonalds." Izuku tries to speak up, but Bakugou shuts him down. "You know what? Maybe it would just be easier for yourself if you took a swan dive off the roof. Maybe then you would have a quirk in the next life."
Bakugou leaves him in that alleyway. Alone, wet. The water drains into the storm drain below, the smell of sewage slowly getting stronger.
Izuku breaks down, falling to his knees in that lonely alleyway. It's forgotten, like him. The only people who will even set foot in this alleyway are city cleaners and people up to no good; somewhat like Izuku's own life. It feels like, sometimes, the only reason people interact with him is to punch down. To target, well, an easy target. After all. He's just a worthless quirkless kid.
His tears fall onto the floor and mix with the rain. He grasps his hair with his hands and only then does he process that wait, why was the sewage smell getting stronger? The tunnels under the drain make an eerie noise
Something's coming. A thing emerges from the manhole. A man made of slime?
"A medium-sized meatsuit. Good enough. Stay still kid, this will only hurt a little." The man made of Sludge grumbles, surging a limb of slime forward. It trips Izuku, who had attempted to dodge, and the Slime man's upon him. There's slime being forced down his throat, he can't breathe, and all he can think about is all the times he's gotten drowned before [his head being shoved in a toilet was only the first]. There's spots at the back of his vision, slowly taking over, and then the drain cover moves aside and out pops a head of blonde hair.
Then, there's All Might standing above him, gently tapping his face with his fingers in a slapping motion to try to get Izuku to wake up.
The first thing Izuku blurts out is if All Might can sign his notebook.
All Might lets out a laugh. "I'm glad to see you're ok, son! I've already signed your notebook, here!" Izuku snatches the notebook and turns to the next blank page. All Mights signature, although now getting slightly smudged by the rain, takes up two pages. He feels his heart swell with joy. Then he hacks up the slime in his lungs.
After he's done coughing, All Might speaks up. "Well, son, I must make my leave. The villain;" He holds up a soda bottle with the slime villain as its contents "Must be taken to the station!"
All Might leaps up into the air. Izuku is clinging onto his pants leg.
"BOY!" All Might shouts. "YOU MUST LET GO OF ME AT ONCE!"
"I WOULD DIE FROM THIS HEIGHT!" He shouts back, rain pelting his face in painful stings. All Might has a 'Oh, Right, I'm stupid' look on his face before angling himself to where he lands onto a rooftop.
"Now. That was very dangerous of you, but I'm going to just let you off either a warning because I really need to go." All Might goes to leap away again, but Izuku lunges forward and grabs onto the back of his shirt. "Wait!" He begs. All Might turns his head and moves his hand to remove Izuku's grasp from his back, but Izuku continues speaking.
"Can I become a hero without a Quirk?"
There's smoke, and All Might's figure is obscured. The smoke blows away in the wind to reveal a skinny man in his face. Izuku's hand is still grasping the back of his shirt. Huh, so part of his quirk is transformation-based, Izuku thinks.
"You could say that, son." All Might says, and oh, Izuku must have said that out loud. "You must tell this to no one, got it? It's the only reason I'm able to live a life without reporters on my doorstep."
Izuku nods his head. He understands the want for privacy. "And to answer your question." Izuku perks up.
"No. You would just be a liability on the field, son. You would be much better off being a police officer, firefighter, or a detective if you want to help people."
Izuku’s heart sinks. And then, All Might is gone, and Izuku's left alone on the rooftop.
Those fields would never accept a Quirkless person. Sure, discrimination is illegal, but they would find a way to deny his application. He's been on Quirkless forums. He's seen how the adults struggle to find jobs that will accept them; they're lucky if they even get a job as a dishwasher.
He glances over the edge. The thought to kill himself has somewhat been tempting over the years, but he's never been able to give up like that. There's something in him that has to keep going. And keep going he shall.
The rain clears.
[]
He’d had to get off the roof using the rickety metal stars on the side of the building. The door to get off the roof had been locked, and he wasn't in the mood to sit there and wait for someone to notice him up there and let him down.
Izuku walks down the street, fighting off tears struggling to form in the corner of his eyes. How could his childhood hero, the number one hero in Japan, just crush his dreams like that once he hears the word ‘Quirkless’? Izuku kicks a stone. He’s just like the rest of them he thinks.Then, he notices a crowd and the glow of a fire.
There's explosions as he rounds the corner, and suddenly he's staring into the eyes of his childhood bully being held hostage by the same Villain as before. He's being actively suffocated, and none of the heros are doing anything. Kamui Woods could get Backdraft to soak his limbs, then target the Slime Villain's eyes and teeth and get Bakuou out. After all, wet wood can't light. But that obvious solution isn't being enacted, and they're not even trying to help him. They're just letting him die.
Izuku looks into Bakugou's eyes and sees fear. He charges in.
A backpack is thrown at the Slime Villain's eye. That manages to distract the Villain enough to pull Bakugou far enough out for him to breathe.
"Shitty Deku, I didn't need your help. I could o-"
All Might appears and punches the Slime Villain, sending his pieces all over the ally.
"That was extremely irresponsible for you to jump in like that, young man. You could have gotten killed. You know if I wasn't feeling so generous right now I could have you charged with Vigilantism!" Backdraft berates.
"I'm quirkless. I can't be considered a Vigilante. Quote; 'One who commits acts of heroism with their quirk without a license.' I never used a quirk." Is all Izuku says. Backdraft is silent. Izuku walks away.
His mother isn't home.
He tears down all his All Might posters that night.