Work Text:
Note time! Imma spill all my thoughts into the pensieve to keep them from rattling around my brain. I stopped writing notes a while ago. I didnt need them anymore. There are some things I couldnt write about because I needed to forget them. Now I'm doing this because I want to remember these days. Things have been better, so I want to start writing again. I want to write every day. Free flowing thoughts. Doesn't have to be good or bad. I should brush my teeth more. I should turn off vibrate on the keyboard, it keeps tripping me off my rhythm. I should write a li-I'M WRITING A LIST NOW.
Make a list. Finish the list. Brush teeth. Clean the house. Clear through some of the Backlogues, but don't let it get in the way of clearing the house or artwork. FINISH SOME ART. IT IS GOOD FOR YOU. Get to bed on time, or closer to it. Don't spend so much on games. Physical or digital. Still want to wait until ps5 gets a slimmer console revision with more storage. If Akira gets a ps5/4 to run on his ancient tv, hook him up with your account so he can play games. Also it helps to get trophies done, but the games I bought will finally be seen by someone, not just sit there. Study more. Don't just leave your stuff on the desk so it can glare at you when you decide to game long into the night, finish sone of it before that big intimidating pile gets to be a mountain. Find his usb. Tonight maybe. Put the things on the computer and give it back. Maybe by tomorrow. DON'T USE YOUTUBE SO MUCH. WATCH MORE ANIME ABSOLUTELY, BUT PLEASE LESS YOUTUBE. I spend too much time there.
Listen to Mum more. Yes, I feel ashamed it took me this long to remember to write that one down. Help her more around the house. Find a way to get her to take your money. Even if she wont take it for rent, go grocery shopping more, or take her out to watch a fun movie. She needs a break. Live a better life. Go to therapy more. Maruki's a pretty weird dude, but it really helps to just have someone who'll let you unload without judging you for it. Akira trusts him, so go back and talk to him some more. Also he has cool snacks. Should I tell him I'm gonna start writing again? Eh. Should prolly lead up to that. Go back to rehab. Kamoshida's Palace was the worst place to find out just how bad my leg's gotten since my last session in track. Don't tell Mum tho, she'd just try and help with the cost and I need to do this to make things right. Also proofread your long arse paragraphs and break them up more.
I've been living like I'm waiting for my life to adjust to working at- OHH GOOD GOIN' NUMPTY! YOU LEFT THE USB IN YA POCKET! FIND A BETTER PLACE FOR IT, YA PLONKER! Where was I? Oh right. Work. I've already been there long enough to have adjusted to it, but I don't do the things I want to focus on, instead ending up gaping at YouTube for hours. Please take care of your meat sack. Do the things that Maruki said. Don't treat it like it's your body, treat it like it's a body you have to protect, or whatever. Fix your posture. Even if you slip, be aware of that to, adjusting when needed. Talk to people more on discord. Even that voice chat in the stuttering help group. Don't let bad days/customers hold you back. You can talk. You are very good at it. Don't let a bad interaction bring you down.
Write more. Do more fanfiction writing. Turn some of those work stories into proper stories. It helps to make peace with them and it'll keep them from cluttering up ya brain box. It is good for you. Also remember the importance of paragraphs! Do that later. Focus on the other things first. Don't float through life. Heather Mac is floating in a lifeboat. Sit alongside her or throw her a line to climb aboard. Don't let her drift away. Don't you drift away. Sail the boat through the storm and come out on the other side. Do something with that plotline where all dropped food gets sealed away in a pocket dimension, which is why food just seems to disappear the second it has a chance to make a break for it. Remember to write that one, it's a funny.
I might be okay with the vibrating text. It'll stay for now. Don't leave the note here. Add to it as often as you can. Take your time and keep calm at work. Hug Akira. Hug Mum. Don't let it be the last time. Never the last time. Write more. Live more. Love more. Laugh more. Be more. I love you. I don't ever want you to forget that. We can get through this. Please don't forget about this note. Pin it, heart it, star it, bookmark it. Screenshot it and save it as the background. Just don't forget about this night. It may be the most important one yet. It was the night you chose to change. A plan is only as good as those who see it through and all that. Tomorrow will come and go, like all the days before it have. Stay with future me. Don't let him forget about tonight. Fix the hole in your sock. Maybe buy thicker socks. Turn the lights off. Blow your nose. Go to bed. Set your alarm before you fall asleep. Serious Room: Go!
Also leave this app open, so that if you don't have time to reread the whole paragraph, you will still see this small bit and remember to do something. Think of something cool and dramatic, but meaningful to go here. Also, PRETTY PLEASE TAKE THE DVDS BACK TO THE LIBRARY. EITHER SIT DOWN AND WAYCH THEM, OR JUST TAKE THEM BACK AND PAY THE FINE! Oh and remember to be grateful for autocorrect. For all the times it messes up, it still does a lot to save your tripping fingers.
Be at peace with the fact that you will soon be at work, mind filling up with ideas that you can't write down, because you started to explore just how many things you needed to remember. Pigpen is my spirit animal. Wait, is there an established 1st person, 3rd person narrator voice in this? Figure that out later. Edit this bit out if you remember. Or don't, it might be funny. Where was I? OOo, yea. Pigpen. The little grubby boy of the Peanuts. This is rapidly loosing what little semblance of the list structure I meant to have. We be in danger of letting a story loose here. He had little dust clouds flying around his head, swarming all over him. I used to think I was like him, in that I'd constantly loose little things around me, but like a brown dust cloud, they'd always find their way back to me. Make your sentences shorter. NEVER! Now I'm the same, but instead of losing things, I have tiny spongebobs running wild in my brain, desperately scrabbling to find the thoughts I was about to use, before they filed them away under the 'Not breathing or fine dining related' dumpster. Where was I going with this? I have a point. I think it might've even been a good one. Umm.. I forgor. Ask again later. Charge your phone, by the way. 17% is great and all, but I'm at the wrong end of it. Also, I'm glad system ui is finally working properly. Yippee! Okay, that's it. Go to bed for real this time. 5 hours isn't all that much, but a 5am start means you'll need to get to Shibuya waay early. I hope they still have biscuits in the tearoom.