Work Text:
The little one stirred in his lap, tossing his head back and forth, and whining. He wasn’t a kicker, but the pain he poured into the force felt like being winded.
“Hey, it’s okay, buddy, you’re alright.” Kanan cooed, moving his navy fringe from his eyes and softly rubbing his back. Everyday since he’d found the little guy, he’d been having nightmares, and it broke Kanan’s heart to see him so scared, and hurt.
Since going on the run, the child had been the first force sensitive he ran into, who didn’t want to kill him. Kanan had never been around babies, or at least, children under four or five, but he couldn’t leave him crying in the alleyway. The force gravitated its users towards each other for a reason, and if Kanan left him, the child would have either died from starvation or by the hands of the Empire.
Blinking his tear-filled eyes, the boy stretched out his arm and grabbed Kanan’s t-shirt, clinging onto it tightly with his tiny fingers. Sniffling and whining, he pushed his head into Kanan’s chest, and Kanan hugged him harder in return.
“I’m here bubba, I won’t let go.” Kanan reassured him. “I got you, buddy. You’re not alone, anymore.” He murmured, sending waves of love to him through the force. “Hey… why don’t I open the curtains and let some light in? We don’t need to be in this scary darkness, do we?”
The little guy peaked his head up, and despite the tears still rolling down his cheeks, he stared up at Kanan with bright eyes and a small smile. The responsibility of a child was never something Kanan dreamed of having, but the kid was so damn cute, he was going to dedicate his life to protecting him.
Kanan grinned back as he picked him up and climbed off the bed, walking over to the window and opening the torn, dirty curtains. “It’s not a pretty view, is it bubba?” Kanan chuckled softly as he looked down at Lothal’s poverty driven streets. Everything the sunlight touched was plagued with homelessness and thieves. The stormtroopers patrolled ragged market stalls with dying owners and you could tell what buildings weren’t Imperial-owned because they looked like they were going to collapse at any moment.
Kanan hadn’t planned on staying in the Capital for longer than a day, but the arrival of the kid changed things. Usually, Kanan didn’t prioritise finding food, but the kid needed to be fed proper meals with how skinny and malnourished he was. Then, Kanan had to buy supplies, and find a medical building to give the bubba a check up, which meant he couldn’t finish his intel mission (the reason why he’d come to Lothal in the first place). A week later and Kanan was finally ready to leave, but his new destination was undecided.
“This is our last day in the hotel. We’ll have to find somewhere else to stay, tomorrow.” Kanan told the boy as he bounced him on his hip. “I think we should catch a transport ship to a nearby planet. You’ll like exploring with me, won’t you, bud?” The little one huffed, sticking out his tongue and Kanan laughed. “Yeah, I get that. It’s okay to not want to leave home, but we need to keep moving. The Empire will find us if we stay in Lothal.” Kanan told him.
“Kay, Dada.” He babbled, sleepily ; making Kanan feel all kinds of emotions as the boy wrapped his hands around his neck.
“Hey, buddy - I still don’t know your name.” Kanan murmured, feeling like he could make use of one of the rare times the boy spoke. “Can you tell me your name?” Kanan asked him.
The boy paused, biting his lip, screwing his face, and staring off into space.
“What did your Mommy and Daddy call you?” Kanan asked, again.
“Ess-wa.” He whispered after a while.
“Ezra, huh?” Kanan breathed. “It suits you, buddy.” When he looked back at the boy, he’d already fallen asleep in his arms. “Sleep well, Ezra.” Kanan murmured into his hair. Then, he carried the boy back to the bed, and tucked him in. “I’ll be right here if you need me.” He told him, squeezing his tiny hand inside his own.
Kanan sat on the edge of the bed, and gulped as he watched his little one settle down. He wondered how many times he’d watch Ezra sleep in the future, and if he’d be able to shake the nightmares. Kanan hoped the first two years or so of his life hadn’t permanently scarred him, and he wouldn’t spend the rest of his life with trauma. He had nightmares, too, and he wouldn’t wish them on anybody, especially a child.
If Ezra wanted him to be his Dad, Kanan was going to be the best Dad he could. No matter what happened, he was going to make sure that Ezra was safe, loved, and protected from the Dark Side.