Chapter Text

Hange and Levi aren’t the same.

As far back as he can remember, Levi has always been stagnant. Memories of his childhood are full of quiet contemplation and steady feelings of complacency, for he has always been comfortable. His grandfather owned a coffee shop which Levi was quick to inherit when he became of age, this being only one of the many things in his life which simply just fell into place. He belonged. He didn’t need to chase, because everything was simply there when he needed it.

But Hange is different.

They seem to be spurred by a rapid flame — the only goal in their mind being to chase after what they want. He sometimes worries about how much he admires this fact about them — it’s not as though his needs have ever been out of reach. He never needs to chase — he surely didn’t like to, anyway — and yet he still admires Hange’s resilience as though he is lacking.

It's cool, he eventually admits to himself. They're cool. They’re fearless, he realizes, because this type of resilience can only be sustained when one lacks fear, of course. They’re brave and unstoppable. It’s admirable.

But when they call him at the ripe hour of 8am on a slow Monday, sounding flustered, Levi thinks that maybe they aren’t that unstoppable.

“What?” He snarls into his phone, already finding himself in a particularly bad mood from a lingering headache that jostled him from sleep just an hour ago.

"Hey," they say, and the way the word tumbles from their lips through a rush instantly makes him pause. "Do you have a minute?"

“No, but you’ll probably take one from me, anyway,” he tries, only to be met with silence, which is weird."Oi,” he calls when the silence lingers for an uncomfortable amount of time.

"Sorry!" They squeal. "Sorry, I’m just a bit… absentminded right now."

'When are you not?' he feels the need to say, but the way they sound doesn’t imply that this is a good time to tease. Something within him senses that something is wrong with them, so he looks at Eren from across his cafe — a snot-nosed worker he hired only because his niece, Mikasa, insisted he needed a job and begged Levi to just give him a shot at wiping you tables down, you won’t be disappointed. Lifting his hand, Levi waves at him, nonverbally disclosing that he’ll be out back for a few minutes before he turns and disappears into the staff room. It’s particularly slow today, anyway — which is surprising for a Monday morning, though he supposes this must be one of those universally lethargic days where everybody chooses to call in sick to work and school.

“What’s wrong?” He asks, listening to the sigh he receives through his speaker.

"It’s… I have a favor."

Uh-oh."What is it?”

"Well, firstly, I have news."

“You have a favor and you have news?” He sniffs. “You’re overwhelming me, here.”

"Sorry," they utter, but they just sound so — defeated. He doesn’t even want to try to tease them.

“Well?” He prompts. “What is it?”

"So, as you know, I’ve been studying for my masters," they remind him, to which he nods.

“Yeah. What about it?”

"Well, I’ve been…" They pause, hesitating like they’re searching for the right words — the silence makes Levi hold his breath. "Struggling," they eventually decide to settle on.

“Struggling?” His brows press together as he tries to wrap his head around the prospect. “With what? Your English courses? I’ve been telling you — you need a tutor to help you with that type of shit-”

"No," they interrupt him, and he’s so jarred by how broken their voice sounds that he instantly shuts up whereas normally he’d be more defiant. "I-I mean, yeah, technically. But that’s not it."

“Then what is it?”

"School," they finally say, like that explains anything. "All of it. It’s hard."

“Hard,” he echoes, floored, because he’s never known Hange to struggle with school. Hange’s a chaser — he knows this — and they’ve always loved science. In high school, they only ever paid attention during science classes whereas they would snooze during English and the million other pointless subjects they sat through. If they aren’t satiated by one thing, they’ll pursue something else. He knows this. He’s always known them to pursue things, to never stop, but… “This is new.”

"Is it?" They laugh, but it sounds a bit choked. "I didn’t know you took me to be a genius."

“Tch.” But it’s not too far off. He’s always thought highly of them — just not openly. “Well, is that the news?”

"Yes." A pause. "Kind of."

“What’s the favor?”

"I’m moving," they tell him, and they say it so easily — like they’re discussing the weather. "Because my lease on my apartment is up, and initially I was going to extend it, but now that I’m taking a break from school I decided to move."

He blinks. “Oh.”

"Yeah," they exhale. "And my plan was to just do everything on my own, but it turns out moving boxes is a bit exhausting, and —"

“Wait,” he interrupts, jarred by this sudden fact that they seem to be glossing over.

"What?"

“You already found a place?”

They laugh sheepishly like they’re trying to save themself a few seconds before responding. "Actually, I’ve been thinking about this for a while. So I’ve been looking for places to live in for a while, too."

“Oh.” Ah. Well, he isn’t sure why he's surprised. Hange doesn’t tell him everything. They have their secrets, even when it seems like they aren’t wired to hide anything simply judging off how they could talk for hours on end about what they’re interested in. Though this feels different — it’s a huge step in their life, a huge decision. A break from school. After taking a gap year once they finished high school, they were so eager for university Levi thought they’d never leave, and yet now they’re voluntarily taking a break. Which is good, of course — they shouldn’t overwork themself — but it’s not that fact that has bothered him. It’s more that… “I thought you would’ve told me sooner.”

"I didn’t know I had to run things by you," they comment pointedly, less amused and teasing and more just confused.

“You don’t,” Levi rushes to defend. “And quite frankly, I don’t care. I have a shop to run right now, so if you can’t get to the point, then — ”

"Okay, okay. Yeesh. You’re grumpy in the morning."

He scowls at a particular spot on the floor which shows his reflection. A vague part of him wants to scold Eren, for now Levi can see his face glare back at him, but he does strive for cleanliness, so he decides it’d be immature to take out his momentary frustration on his niece’s boyfriend.

"I just need some help moving my boxes."

He sighs. “Right. Of course. You didn’t have anyone else to ask?” The question comes out sounding a bit more bitter than he’d intended, but Hange doesn’t seem to care — they’re used to his lack of tact ostensibly.

"I had a roommate," they begin. "Well, have. I still do."

“And what happened to them? Did they suddenly disappear once they saw your face?”

"Rude," Hange huffs, and Levi does know that was a bit harsh — even for him. But he doesn’t apologize, either — he just lets out a grunt which Hange hopefully interprets as sorry."But for your information, he was here. But he had an emergency, so he left, and now I have all these boxes, and I already called Erwin, but he’s busy, so —"

“I get it,” he groans. “You need help,” he sighs, easing his expression into a neutral one.

"Ah, my hero."

“I haven’t said yes yet.”

"So you got my hopes up just to let me down."

“You’re dramatic,” he groans, rolling his eyes despite knowing he can’t be seen. “I guess I’ll have to check with Eren to see if he can work the front for a bit. But I won’t be able to stay for too long — ”

He’s interrupted by an eager squeal on the other end. "So you can come?"

“But not for long — ”

"But can you?" They press.

He shrugs. “Yes. I can come and help — ”

He’s interrupted by another gleeful squeal which also sounds relieved, and even though he tries to deny it, Levi can imagine their smile which, in turn, makes him snort.

“Dork,” he says, fondly.

"Levi, you softie!" They chirp. "I’ll send you the address. And I owe you! Ugh — thank you so much."

“Whatever,” he mutters, hanging up as they squeal again, but when he looks down, he finds his reflection looking back at him on the cleaned flooring, and it’s only then when he realizes that he’s smiling.

Dork, he thinks, though this time, he isn’t sure who the dork is.

—

Hange’s waiting for him by the time Levi arrives. Leaning against their pick-up truck, fiddling with something on their phone — they don’t notice him even as he treks across the parking lot towards them. Their hair is half-up and half-down, glasses sitting snug on their nose, and to accommodate for the late spring heat, they’re dressed in one of those tank-tops with the large arm holes that show their binder and a pair of shorts that Levi recognizes — the ones he lent them once that they never returned.

“Oi,” he calls, and they instantly look up at him, a smile already gracing their features before their eyes even have a chance to land on him. “This is the place?” He asks, turning to the apartment complex of the parking lot they stand in.

It’s a bit tall and silver, though it looks ancient — the paint chips at a few corners, and some of the windows look rimmed with dust. But it looks nice — it’s definitely a step up from their old place. If this building can be described as ancient, then their old place was prehistoric — Levi didn’t approve of it the minute he entered their apartment, so he finds himself relieved that this place looks a bit safer.

“This is the place,” Hange confirms, snapping him from his thoughts. He turns to them, following as they round their truck to the space in the back full of boxes. “My roommate helped with some of my luggage, but I still need help with these.”

He hums in acknowledgment, letting them grab one of the bigger boxes and place it in his grasp before they grab another and begin walking towards the entrance. It’s a bit noisy, though that’s unavoidable — they do live in the city after all, so there’s bound to be some bustle even at 8am — but the minute they step inside, it’s dead quiet.

Levi mocks a whistle. “They’re letting you live here?” He asks, following them into the elevator. “It’s so quiet — do they know how loud you are?” When Hange laughs, their laughter bounces off the walls. He clicks his tongue, “see.”

“Oh, shut up,” they lightly scold, jamming the button for the sixth floor. “It’s fine — the walls are thick. I think.”

“You think,” he deadpans. “Doesn’t sound very promising.”

“Would it kill you to be nice to me?” They sigh, the elevator doors sliding apart, though they smile as they say it.

“Yes,” he quips, which they roll their eyes at.

“If you aren’t nice, I won’t treat you to lunch after this.”

That shuts him up. They snicker at that, leading him to apartment 68. Setting their box down, they fish for their keys in the pockets of their (Levi’s) shorts, and as they fumble to get the door open, Levi lets his eyes roam the corridor. It has that hotel smell to it — the good hotel smell, not the shitty-hotel smell of cigarettes. It seems more luxurious within than it does out, as though the people who own the space wanted to perfect the interior for its residents rather than the exterior for passersby. It almost makes it seem like this place can’t be that much cheaper than Hange’s old place, even as run-down as it was and even with the fact that they now have a roommate.

“How’d you pick this place, anyway?” He finally gives in and asks. They open the door, gesturing for him to enter first before they follow after.

“I told you that already.”

“No,” he sets the box down and follows them back out, “I mean, how’d you afford this place? Even with a roommate, it doesn’t seem like this is much cheaper than your old place.”

They go stiff at his accusation which makes him quirk a brow, watching the way they push their bangs out of their face and laugh weakly.

“I used my charm to get my roommate to split rent, 70/30,” they try.

He narrows his eyes, unresponsive. They sigh.

“Okay, in all honesty, my roommate offered to pay over half the rent,” they admit once they re-enter the elevator.

“Why?” He sniffs.

“Well, actually, I know him from one of my classes. He graduated and already has a job, and he offered me his spare room when he heard I was moving. Said he’d pay most of the rent and that he didn’t mind.”

Levi cocks a brow. “Why is he so generous? That seems suspicious.”

“It’s not suspicious,” they defend a little too sharply, glowering at him. Levi almost instantly reels in his skepticism, catching how Hange instantly tries to correct themself by clearing their throat and redirecting their gaze to the elevator buttons. “I mean, he’s just a generous person. And he cares about me — his friend.”

Levi blinks. 'Why? ’ He almost presses, but he decides against it. “Okay…” he exhales instead, watching the way Hange crosses their arms before he notices — did they get thinner? He sees Hange every so often when they aren’t preoccupied with their studies or work, and even then, it’s been a cold spring lately and it only started warming up just a few weeks ago, so they’ve always been dressed relatively warm. Layered up, he means, so he hasn’t seen them like this lately — exposed arms and legs. But they look thin. Frail. He frowns at their suddenly dainty wrists before realizing that he might look like he’s ogling their chest, so he instantly looks away and stares at the display atop the elevator doors, watching as the numbers descend to the ground floor.

Ding.

The doors swing open and Hange is gone before Levi can even blink. He recollects himself and quickly follows after, deciding he probably shouldn’t press matters that don’t concern him as he instead refocuses on moving the boxes.

He knows he said he wouldn’t stay for long, but he finds himself remaining there and helping them move every single box as though he suddenly feels guilted into helping. He isn’t sure what it is, but he decides it doesn’t matter anyway — it was a slow morning, as he remembers, so Eren can handle himself. If Levi stays for too long, anyway, he’ll just send Eren home early.

“I have to use the restroom,” Hange says after making their second-to-last trip. “I’ll be back.”

“Have fun,” he mutters as he leaves the apartment as Hange weaves their way towards their bathroom. When he returns to their pick-up truck, he grabs the last box — it’s a heavy one: he quickly scowls when he finds his arm trembling to support the weight as he walks towards the entrance. Thankfully, someone is already there, opening the front door wider for him to enter and offering him what might be a sympathetic smile as Levi struggles to walk up the steps to the entrance. He walks towards the elevator just as the person at the door does, and they do him the favor of pressing the button and letting him enter first before they enter behind him.

“Thanks,” he mutters, and the person — the guy — nods, smiling.

“What floor are you headed to?” He asks, and Levi finds himself ready to ask why he cares before realizing — right, he can’t press the buttons himself.

“The sixth floor.”

“Oh, me too,” he chirps. “Lucky you.”

“Yeah, lucky.” Levi doesn’t know why the guy seems so cheerful towards him, but he’s seen Hange like this enough times to know that perhaps it’s simply in his nature to be this kind. Hange’s always had a problem of concerning themselves too much with business that isn’t theirs, but once Levi got past his initial annoyance with that fact, he finds himself revering that trait because only a few people he’s encountered have been that kind.

When the doors slide open, the guy smiles at Levi, his hazel eyes gleaming as he steps aside and swings an arm out. “After you,” he says, making Levi nod.

“Thanks.”

He walks towards apartment 68, but as he rounds the corner, he turns to find the guy still behind him. Lurking. Levi frowns before telling himself — it’s a small world, maybe he just lives here. But then Levi stops in front of apartment 68, and the guy behind him stops, too, and Levi turns with a scowling straining across his features.

“What the fuck?" He grunts, frowning at the guy. “Are you following me?”

The guy’s smile falters, quickly turning sheepish as he lifts a trembling hand and points his finger at the door to apartment 68. “I — uh — live there.”

Levi blinks. "What?" He barks, but it’s then when Hange emerges from the apartment, swinging the door open with their glasses sliding down their nose.

“Oh — Levi,” they say, blinking at him before they turn to his stalker. “Moblit!” They chirp, much more cheerfully than they’d said Levi’s name which makes him bitter (though he’d never admit to that out loud). “What happened? Is your mom okay?”

The stalker — Moblit, ostensibly — nods. “Yeah, she’s fine. She’ll be okay.”

“That’s good,” Hange hums, and Levi squirms, which is odd, because he never squirms. But he feels left out, so he clears his throat almost petulantly, forcing both Hange’s and Moblit’s attention to him. “Oh! Right! Moblit, this is my friend, Levi,” they begin to explain. “He came over to help after you left. And Levi,” Hange turns to him, "this is my roommate.”

Levi blinks. “Oh.”

Moblit blinks, too. “Ah…”

Hange cocks a brow. “What?”

“I thought he was stalking me,” Levi blurts, to which Moblit nervously laughs at.

“It was a misunderstanding. Anyway! It’s nice to meet you, Levi.” He juts an arm out, and Levi stares at it for an uncomfortably long amount of time before Hange groans and grabs one of Levi’s hands, jostling the box in his arms and making him shift all its weight onto one arm.

“Sorry about that,” Hange chuckles, stuffing Levi’s hand into Moblit’s grasp and making them shake hands. “He’s socially inept.”

"Oi," Levi barks.

Hange just laughs again, releasing his hand and opening the door wide enough for them to enter. “Well, come in, come in. That’s the last box, I’m pretty sure.”

Moblit nods, though both he and Levi step forward at the same time and bump shoulders. Levi turns to him, glaring, and Moblit backs down way too quickly with a nervous chortle. “Sorry,” he amends, stepping out of the way and letting Levi walk inside to set the box down.

Hange, who watches that entire ordeal play out, instantly wacks Levi on the shoulder once the box is safely out of his grasp. “Be nice,” they scold, and Levi rolls his eyes like a petulant child.

“Uhm,” Moblit clears his throat, “do you guys want any beverages?”

“No,” Levi says, just Hange says, “yes, please.” They exchange a look, but Hange’s gaze is firm on him. Be nice, he hears again, and he gives in with a sigh.

“If you have tea,” he concedes dejectedly. “I’ll take a cup before I leave.”

“Okay!” Moblit says, nodding. “Tea! Yeah, I have tea.”

He seems way too awkward, and Levi wonders how Hange manages to acquire such a polite yet painfully awkward friend — a roommate.

“I’ll just get some water,” Hange offers, walking into the kitchen to grab a cup from the cabinets. Levi doesn’t miss how easily they move about the space — like they’ve been here before, like they know where everything is. It makes him sick with indignance before he grunts and turns away, scolding himself. Why are you upset? Did you really expect them to have no friends besides you and Erwin? Are you really that narcissistic?

“Make yourself at home,” Moblit offers Levi, noticing that he was still standing in the entryway awkwardly. “Take a seat and kick your feet up. I don’t mind.”

I wonder how many times Hange’s heard you say that, he thinks bitterly, before he lights on the way both Moblit and Hange stiffen. Because of could he would say that out loud.

“Levi,” Hange starts, turning to him with a frown. “What the hell?”

He’s always been too prideful — his mother once told him that was a terrible trait of his, that took too much after his uncle that way. This moment is no exception — he’s too prideful to apologize. He just sniffs, looks away with a glower, and shrugs. “Where’s your bathroom?”

“Down the hall to the left,” both Moblit and Hange say.

Levi tightens his lips. “Thanks.” He walks down the hall and into the restroom, letting the door fall shut behind him before he presses himself against the wood. Blinking, he lights on his reflection and finds his expression particularly nasty — which is dumb, he’s being dumb. But he doesn’t bother to fix it, either. He just steps forward and stares into the reflection before he looks down and sees the toothbrush holder, lighting on how there are two toothbrushes.

No… he thinks, stepping towards the shower and pushing back the curtain even as the metal rings scrape abrasively against the shower rod, making him wince. But then he reaches for the first bottle he sees, uncaps it, and, ignoring his common sense and the usual repulsion he’d feel from snooping through somebody’s stuff, he sniffs it.

Coconut shampoo.

Just like Hange’s.

No, he thinks more vehemently, reaching for another bottle. Citrus-scented body soap. Just like Hange’s. He swings the shower curtain shut, opens one of the sink drawers, and eyes the hair ties. Moblit’s hair looks too short to be tied, which could only mean — Hange. But — the hairbrush, he thinks. He’s being creepy when he does this, he knows, but he takes the hairbrush out and pulls one of the knots of hair from the bristles, and lifts it up the ceiling light.

Brown hair.

Just like Hange’s.

Brows furrowing, Levi drops the brush back into the drawer and reels in the urge to slam it shut. Shit, he thinks, scowling as he scans the bathroom again. He goes to the shampoo and body soap again, looks at the toothbrush holder again, and reexamines the hairbrush, before, finally, it dwells on him. Fuck.

Hange has a boyfriend.

His gut twists and he feels sticky with shame. But it makes sense. It seems plausible. Hange’s defensiveness about Moblit’s generosity, him offering to pay over half their rent, them having been here before, all of their possessions being the bathroom. I wonder what I’d find in the bedroom, he thinks before instantly reeling in disgust at the thought.

But no. Hange wouldn’t hide a boyfriend, would they? They’re so — open. They’re a rapidly growing flame. It's hard for them to hide anything and yet — they hid school from him. They hid the fact that they’re moving. Why would they hide that?

If they were moving in with their boyfriend that I don't know about, maybe that's why they hid it, he thinks, frowning.

He decides he’s too blinded by how upset he is to stay here — even as hospitable as Moblit is. So Levi sighs, trying to quell his anger as he flushes the toilet to feign some sort of usage before smacking the faucet on. Washing his hands to rid himself of his sudden feeling of ickiness before he splashes water on his face to cool down, Levi shuts off the tap, blinks at his reflection, and finds that nasty expression twisting its way back onto his face again.

Shit.

He grabs a paper towel and dries his face before he swings the door open and re-enters the main room. Hange and Moblit speak amongst each other in hushed voices — they must be having a heated discussion that they want to keep from him (about their relationship, probably, and how they’re going to hide it from him). But the minute Levi reappears in the hallway, their conversation quiets and Hange, who now sits at one of the chairs by the kitchen counter, redirects their attention to him, straining a smile into their flushed cheeks.

“All good?” They ask.

"'M fine," he nods. “And I should head back to work now.”

“Ah, what about your tea?” Moblit asks.

Levi frowns. “I’ll manage.”

“Wait,” Hange says even as Levi begins making his way towards the door. He doesn’t even bother stopping. “Let me walk you to the front.”

“No need,” he grumbles.

“Come on, I live here now — it’s only polite that I walk you out.”

You might live here now, but how many nights have you stayed over? He wants to snap.

“Fine,” he blurts instead.

Hange beams at him, opening the door and gesturing for him to walk out first. They step into the elevator together, and he eyes their frail figure with sick unease — first, they hide a boyfriend from Levi, now what? Why are they so thin?

But he doesn’t press that. It’s not his business. It doesn’t feel like his business anymore.

“Thanks for helping me out by the way,” Hange says as they step into the elevator. They punch the button for the ground floor as they say, "I couldn't have done it without you," with a soft edge to their voice.

“You could’ve waited for Moblit to come back,” he grumbles bitterly, purposefully dismissing their fondness. “I’m sure he’d help you out with anything if he could.”

“Ah, yeah,” they laugh, somehow nervous, smiling sheepishly even when Levi snarls at the floor once the elevator starts moving. “He’s pretty generous.”

“A little too generous to just be a friend, if you ask me,” he bites. But that must’ve been the tipping point, because silence instantly follows, for it seems not even Hange wants to try to entertain him and his petulant behavior. Yet he doesn’t even feel sympathetic or remorseful — Hange’s the bad friend here, choosing to hide such a big thing from him such as a literal boyfriend.

When the elevator stops moving, having reached the ground floor, the doors don’t swing open as they usually do. Levi stares — or more like glares — at the doors, as though he can will them to slide open simply by burning holes through them with his gaze. Yet when the idleness persists, Hange sighs and finally turns to him with a frown, interrupting the thick silence between them.

“Why are you acting like such an ass today?”

Levi bites down on his bottom lip, trying to swallow down the feeling of knives in his throat. Purposefully, he turns away so that he doesn't have to face them, but when the thick feeling inside of him doesn't subside and his eyes flit up to meet Hange's irritated expression, his last shred of composure shrivels up like a burnt piece of paper as he jeers, ironically, "I’m the asshole?” The atmosphere is suffocating enough to make it hard to breathe, to look at each other, to speak — but like the creatures of nature they are, defiantly, they suffer through the discomfort and face each other.

“Yes, you are!” Hange scoffs. “You were fine this morning, but then Moblit showed up, and — look, I know you’re not good with people, but — ”

“I’m fine with people,” Levi defends, petulatny.

Hange laughs. “You’re funny, you know that? You’re so funny, with how you’re being incredibly rude to my roommate — "

“Roommate?” Levi echoes. “Roommate? Roommate? Do you seriously expect me to believe that?”

“Believe what?" They cry. “I’m not hiding anything from you!”

“Now that’s a lie.”

“It’s not!”

“It is!”

“Why are you accusing me of things? What happened? Why are you acting so difficult — ?”

The elevator doors swing open, finally. Levi doesn’t hesitate to walk out.

“Hey, don’t walk away from me!” Hange cries, distressed.

“Why shouldn’t I?” He scoffs, lumbering past the people around them and towards the front doors even with the odd stares they give him. He pushes the front doors open, stepping out, but Hange instantly follows after and pushes the doors open to stare at his retreating back.

“Levi, what the hell? I thought you were my friend!”

He stiffens, turning to them — staring at them — hurt, wounded, betrayed. He sneers, “friends don’t lie.”

Their brows furrow. “What?

“If you were my friend,” he snaps, “you wouldn’t have hidden things from me.”

"What?" They repeat, but Levi can’t entertain this anymore. He pivots on his heel and walks towards his car, even with Hange’s distressed cry echoing out from behind him. “Why won't you just talk to me?" But he ignores it and opens his car, clambering into his car and turning his car on, feeling the engine roar to life beneath his feet. His blood is boiling over, him being seconds away from exploding even as he drives away. Looking through the rearview mirror, he sees Hange shake their head before they shut the entrance and disappear into the building.

Traitor, he thinks, fuming, redirecting his gaze to the road. You wouldn’t lie about this. Not about this. Not to me about this.

Though it's probably not right or fair to blame them for such a thing. But still.

Levi is hurt. And inside of him, something ugly twists into his gut — thick, heavy, green.

He hates how much he instantly wants to turn the car back around once he starts to drive off.

He hates it all.