Work Text:
I'm wrong
why do I feel so wrong
My head's all screwed on backwards
Half the screws too loose
The others too bent to work anyways
My mind a mess
Sometimes it hurts to laugh
For happiness never lasts and I don't deserve it when life brings it to my doorstep
I shoudn't let it in
I cannot let it in
But I let it in again anyways
For I am foolish to the core
and inside still a naive child
And hope is the devil
And I break and I wilt and I'm left a wreck
When it decides to laugh in my face
Before it leaves me again
And the Darkness creeps up cheerfully
I want to be loved
I want to believe I deserve to be loved
But it is unimaginable for this broken brain of mine
Used to selfhate a lot more than to kindness anyways
As if I ever had the chance of a happy ending
Still leaving my head half in the sling
Dangling on the ceiling beam
the three legged stool wobbily holding the weight
And so I bow and diligently hold the door open with the welcome on my lips
As my beloved darkness enters
Air of owning the place
For it at least does not lie to me
Like happiness does
And treats me as I am used to be treated
With solid rules, easy to follow in familiarity
even if it hurts
I have no worth
I don't deserve to be loved
Nobody could ever want me
And I will never be happy again.