Chapter Text
teyvats hottest ppl😩(except pulci srry)
child: yoo an do u have a twin??
richahh: no?
child: r u sure cause there’s this green version of u in liyue
xoxo: just imagined that and he looks fucking ugly
child: nahhh cause he actually looks good
sharky : pic?
richahh: why do u want a picture of a green “version” of me?
sharky: to add to my collection duh
richahh: collection??
child: k here
xoxo: is that a fucking snake
sharky: damnnn down the the smile
richahh: did u clone me dottore?
sharky: i would never without your consent love
child: ew
richahh: alright
angel: the glasses to lol
xoxo: bina<3
angel: lec<3
child: sounds like lick
xoxo: stfu
child: dam
sharky: anyway u sure u don’t just have a sibling pantalone?
richahh: if i had a sibling i’m pretty sure i would know, goes for twin as well
child: long lost sibling????
richahh: childe shut up
child: homophobic much
richhahh: i’m literally dating dottore u clown
child: @Papanella pantalone is making fun of me
Papanella is online
papanella: Pantalone please refrain from bullying Tartaglia.
richahh: then tell him to stop saying false things
papanella: I will do so. Tartaglia please refrain from from saying false things.
child: fine
papanella: :)
Papnella is offline
richahh: i will cut off your pay
child: NOO PLS I NEED THAT MONEY
xoxo: is it for your sugar baby back in liyue?
child: I DO NOT HWVEA SUAGR BABY
sharky: liarrrrrrr
richahh: speaking of that you’ve overspend
richahh: so u owe me money
child: how much?
richahh: 38,069,420 exactly
angel: woow more than i’ve spend this year
Caprison is online
caprison: why is childe on the floor crying?
caprison: oh i see, that fucking idiot
angel: LMAO OF HE SAWVTHAT HE WOULD SOB
caprison: he indeed saw it and is sobbing
xoxo: what a loser
sharky: take a pic
caprison: alr
angel: new blackmail lol
angel: also y u so quiet pantalone?
richahh: i’m seeing which commissions pay the most to send to childe
xoxo: isn’t the highest u could pay just like 1mil? those r rare tho
sharky: he’s going to be working his ass off lmao
robodrone: i’ve got one with a 5mil pay
angel: woow
xoxo: seems i was wrong
child: SANDRONE PLS I NEND TAT PLEAE EBILL DO ANYTIMG JUSRS GIVE ME IT
robodrone: oh?
xoxo: what’s it even for?
angel: monster hunting mayybe
sharky: if it’s a rare one bring it back for i could dissect it
richah: give me the fur
robodrone: “find out who the dark knight hero is” in mondstadt
child: that’s all?
xoxo: what a stupid name
sharky: whoever named themselves that has bad naming skills lol
richahh: why 5mil though?
robodrone: something about them destroying their work in mondstadt or smth like that
child: yall remember that red haired dude?
sharky: that went around destroying our fatui camps?
child: ya
richahh: ah, yes he was a pain in the ass since i had to pay for everything he destroyed
xoxo: probs dottores fault for not being secretive about his bases
sharky: nah i was secretive abt it he just somehow found them
child: LMAO
angel: yes! he even became a rumor around the fatui agents
xoxo: smth about if u see a man with a mask with sum type of beak and dark clothes with a delusion you’re dead?
angel: yuuup!
chlild: now i kinda wanna fight him
robodrone: quite similar to the description of the man just with a vision
child: pls pls pls Sandrone!
angel: mf even capitalized the s lmao
Pierro is online
Pierro: Dottore, Arlecchino, and Columbina. Aren’t you guys out of Snezhnaya in a mission?
sharky: yup
xoxo: Indeed I am.
angel: ah yes
Pierro: Then stop getting distracted here and get to work.
xoxo: Yes, Sir.
sharky: okay
angel: ofc
Pierro is offline
angel: annoying old man i swear
child: why’s your name angel
angel: shut up
child: yes Ma’am
robodrone: come to my workplace tartaglia
child: yes ma’am
sharky: anyways i’m off
Sharky is offline
xoxo: same
angel: me too
Xoxo is offline
Angel is offline
child: capitano, an :)
Richahh is offline
Caprison is offline
Robodrone is offline
child: alr
Child is offline