Chapter Text
There was something strange in making a play for mental health awareness. Rui was happy to do it of course, it would be a great opportunity to do something… less kid oriented. It had been a teacher's idea to have the school take a week to research and present their findings on mental health in some way that would bring the topic closer to them and be more memorable to the audience.
Now a week wasn’t a lot of time to write a play and learn it, but Rui was confident in his and his chosen actors' skills. They were all familiar with shows in one way or another, after all.
And that was how he ended up going around the school searching for a certain redhead. Of course he was aware that Shinonome-kun wasn’t the most fond of him, but he hoped to convince him to help anyway, especially since both Shiraishi-san and Aoyagi-kun had already agreed to join. And while yes, he could’ve just left it to them to ask Shinonome-kun, he preferred to ask him himself, considering the particular subject matter, no one would be able to give more detailed information about what he had in mind, should Shinonome-kun have any questions.
He had already checked Shinonome-kun’s home room and, after inquiring with Aoyagi-kun, with the football club, but so far, no luck.
Rui, getting a little frustrated, decided to instead take a short break and continue the search afterwards. Not wanting to deal with his classmates, he resolved to go up to the roof to get some fresh air, recoup, and think of new places to search.
Walking up the long stairway to the roof, he made a mental list of places to look at next. Having a hard time coming up with other places, Rui was getting a little disheartened, so when he finally got to the door to the rooftop, he absentmindedly opened it and walked through, still trying to think of more places.
In the corner of his eyes, he saw a familiar figure who appeared to be listening to music over their headphones, dancing and twirling around. It was Shinonome-kun, the revelation causing Rui to have an on-the-spot change of mood. Shinonome-kun hadn’t seemed to notice him yet, instead enjoying his music causing Rui to start chuckling, quickly alerting the other to his presence. As Shinonome-kun turned around, Rui noted that the redhead’s cheeks were turning a bright scarlet red.
“Enjoying yourself, hmm?” Rui asked, his voice containing a friendly yet teasing tone.
“Huh? The hell do you want?” To his credit, while his cheeks definitely betrayed the embarrassment he felt, Shinonome-kun’s voice showed nothing but disgruntlement.
“My my Shinonome-kun, so quick to attack~ Anyone could’ve come up here! If you didn’t want an audience, perhaps you should’ve gone somewhere else, hmm?” Rui hoped the other was in a good enough mood, that his light teasing wouldn’t set him off too much.
“That’s… stop distracting from my question! What. Do. You. Want?”
Luckily that seemed to be the case.
“Well since you asked so nicely… I did actually have a reason to look for you. Now, before you turn me down, your friends, Shiraishi-san and Aoyagi-kun will be helping out as well.”
He paused, leaving room for Shinonome-kun to protest and, when none came, continued.
“As you know, our school wants us to learn a bit about mental health. Since they left it to us to decide how we wish to present our research, I thought a play would be a good idea. Now here’s the catch, Nene-chan, Tsukasa-kun and myself aren’t nearly enough to fill all the roles and while yes, I could make some robots to fill them, I had already imagined them in a… more fitting role.”
Shinonome-kun shifted in discomfort but silently signaled for him to go on.
“I was thinking you could take a minor role, since you don’t have as much experience as Tsukasa-kun but it would be a big help.”
“And why me? Why not anyone else?”
“Well, you know how to perform! And we only have a week, so having experienced actors is essential!”
“I don’t act though? I literally never tried to before.”
“Well~ Shiraishi-san told me that you act very different from yourself when you’re dealing with customers, so that’s basically acting! Look, if you truly don’t want to do it that’s fine, I just think it would be a lot easier for us to get done in time, if everyone involved already had experience.”
After a heavy sigh Shinonome-kun nodded and answered, “Alright fine. Let’s do this, Kamishiro-senpai.” Which caused Rui to perk up, face breaking out into a grin that seemed to startle Shinonome-kun.
“Great! Here’s the script, if you have any questions or concerns, do come find me. And mind the trigger warnings! Please put your own safety in front of the play’s success.” And with that he gave another satisfied grin before bidding Shinonome-kun goodbye, heading back into the school.
Robotics was the one field in which Rui always had the latest news and information on. Which was exactly why after hearing about a book which was written by some of the foremost experts in AI and which covered cutting edge computer algorithms, Rui decided that he just had to have it. The only problem Rui had to deal with was how to obtain it. The process of obtaining the book was an unpleasant one as it was a niche book that didn’t have a lot of copies printed, was expensive, and on top of that, it was very old. So, Rui decided that he would have to source it from other places.
He had been pondering this problem for the last 10 minutes or so. School ended ages ago but he stayed behind late to finish his homework early, as he didn’t want to deal with it later. After he finished, he slowly started putting his school supplies back into his bag. In the time he was doing this slow and monotonous activity, he had a sudden thought in the back of his head. Rui knew the right person to ask about the book.
He quickly shoved his pencil box into the lower compartment of his backpack and ran out of the classroom in a hurry. It just so happened that the Library Committee of the school met every few days to discuss what new books to order and what books needed to be replaced, among other things. Right around the time that Rui was finished with his work would be the time their meeting had ended and Rui could ask them if the school library stocked the book, and if not, where he could get it.
He made it out of the school building right on time to find Aoyagi-kun lingering around outside. Rui called out to him, and Aoyagi-kun whipped his head back, hearing his senpai call out for him.
“Aoyagi-kun! How nice to see you~ You’re just the person I’ve been looking for!” Rui said cheerfully, still trying to catch his breath.
“Kamishiro-senpai… What business do you have with me that you need to hound me down while running?” Aoyagi inquired in his usual monotone voice.
“Welllll… you see, there’s this pretty old book that came out a few years ago called ‘The Age of AI: A Modern Approach’ by Ada Turing and I can’t find the book anywhere! It’s very expensive too, from what I’ve heard. Can I ask if the school library is stocking this book and if not, do you know anyplace else where I can get it, hopefully at a price that does not bankrupt me for a few years?” He chuckled lightly. Beyond the book, he also had to buy spare parts himself, so any price reduction would be amazing.
“Judging by the title and topic of the book as well as the given circumstances… I am pretty sure we do not have such a book stocked in the school library. However, I heard the local library has an expansive section on computer science, so that library would probably be your best bet. It’s actually very close by. Just take a walk straight from here, take a left, then a right, and you’ll be at the place.” Aoyagi-kun explained. Rui was glad at least some people at school didn’t treat him with extreme caution or he would surely have a harder time getting what he wanted.
“Oh? That’s very nice to know! Since I just transferred here, I haven’t been able to really get to know the area well. Thanks for the advice Aoyagi-kun!” he said quickly, eager to get to the aforementioned library.
Aoyagi-kun nodded and Rui ran off into the streets, following Aoyagi-kun’s exact directions. Soon enough, he arrived at a huge modern looking library with tons of glass windows and a unique flowing shape. Rui pushed the doors to head inside and immediately going for the computer science section located at the back of the shelves in the complex, so Rui quickly walked past several shelves to find the section he was looking for.
At the very end of the library stood the tower of books all about computer science, Rui could barely contain the excitement that had built up inside him, even if he didn’t find the specific book he wanted, there was bound to be something he could work with. Quickly he went up to the books for closer inspection, scanning the shelf to find his desired title. As he browsed the shelf, he noticed a weird sound, kind of like heavy breathing, if he had to describe it. Rui stopped searching for a moment and focused his attention on the sound which clearly came from the rows of desks that were to the left of him.
Now completely sure that it was indeed heavy breathing, his curiosity and concern peaked, which led him out of the computer science section as he scanned the area to determine who the sound was coming from. There were barely any people, so he could easily make out the familiar figure of Shinonome-kun, a few desks down the aisle. The heavy breathing became louder as he got a bit closer, making him decide it was probably coming from Shinonome-kun. Worried about what was happening, he rushed over to the other, to check if Shinonome-kun was experiencing some kind of allergy attack or illness.
“Shinonome-kun? Are you okay? What’s wrong?” He asked a flurry of words escaping him, as he examined the situation.
Shinonome-kun said nothing in response, causing Rui to worry even more. He saw that the other was sweating, trembling, and had difficulty breathing. The gears starting to turn in his head, Rui pieced together what was happening. He noted that Shinonome-kun had been looking down at the desk, reading a stack of paper and checking what was on the papers, he quickly recognized his script for the school play.
All at once, everything made sense to Rui. Shinonome-kun wasn’t having an allergic reaction at all! Since his copy of the play was turned to a page of the play where a character was attempting to self-harm, Rui figured that the topic must’ve triggered Shinonome-kun and the symptom, which he had mistaken for one of allergies, was instead a sign that Shinonome-kun was going through a panic attack.
That Information in mind, Rui quickly did his best to try and get Shinonome-kun out of that headspace by removing the play from the table and speaking to the other softly.
“Okay… okay… It’s okay Shinonome-kun. You are having a panic attack, and I am here for you… Just look at me. I’ve got you.” Rui tried to say in the most calm and collected manner he could, he wasn’t exactly the best person to help with this, but he hoped, he was a familiar enough presence that it didn’t freak Shinonome-kun out more, at the very least.
Shinonome-kun, hearing those words, slowly lifted his head up to Rui, eyes glazed over with tears.
“Breathe with me, inhale, then exhale. Inhale… then exhale.” He demonstrated his actions to Shinonome-kun and the other seemed to be following along with him, breathing together, though the other did struggle a bit at first.
Rui gently, slowly moved his hand towards Shinonome-kun's and gripped it firmly, to let the other know that he was there for him and that he wouldn’t be leaving any time soon, at least not until they got a grip on the situation. With his other hand Rui caressed Shinomone-kun’s arm with light strokes and gave it a squeeze as he looked deep into the other’s eyes, searching for a sign that Shinonome-kun was getting better.
And soon enough, slowly but surely, the other composed himself, getting his breathing more and more under control until finally, he escaped from the anxiety induced mindset that had been suffocating him. Seeing this, Rui silently thanked the internet, as he would’ve been at a loss for what to do, had he not done some research prior to this incident.
“Are you… better now, Shinonome-kun?” Rui started to ask, concern still painting his voice.
The other looked at Rui, his tears starting to dry, and gave a slow yet affirmative nod, as he went to wipe them away. Rui didn’t know how much time passed or was going to pass, all he cared about at that moment was Shinonome-kun’s well-being.
He would not let go until the other was okay again.
After a while, Shinonome-kun’s breathing had returned to normal completely and he gently pulled out of Rui’s grasp. Avoiding his gaze, Shinonome-kun silently started collecting his things and put them into his bag. When he noticed the script missing, Shinonome-kun finally turned to Rui again.
“Wh-“ Shinonome-kun’s voice was still rough and he cleared his throat before continuing. “Do you know where the script is?”
Rui was shocked. Was he hearing this right? Despite having such a severe reaction, Shinonome-kun didn’t want to drop out? Rui wasn’t sure if he should describe it as dedicated or just plain stupid. He hoped he could convince the other that going to such lengths was unnecessary, was his last thought before he launched into a gentle yet firm lecture about it.
After “the incident”, Rui was determined to figure out what was going on with Shinonome-kun more specifically and so, he made it his mission to spend as much time with him as was humanly possible. He was not being obsessive, thank you very much Tsukasa, he was just… concerned. Honestly, the vast amounts of research he did on panic attacks and mental health in general because of it, should prove it, it even helped with the script for their play a lot! So even if in the end Shinonome-kun made the, in his opinion, wiser choice, to drop out of the play, the other was still owed a thanks for his contribution. And because of it, today like everyday since “the incident”, Rui, as soon as his own class finished, made his way to Shinonome-kun’s classroom.
Sadly the redhead hadn't been particularly cooperative, finding an excuse and running away as soon as he saw Rui.
Which- okay yeah it did suck, but he had yet to hear an actual “leave me alone”, so until he did, he would continue to bother Shinonome-kun.
So anyways, today, like everyday recently, Rui made his way to Shinonome-kun’s classroom. He wasn’t entirely sure what Shinonome-kun’s taste was like, but he was convinced that no one, not one person, could dislike candy. Good thing he always bought those in bulk.
He had a plan of sorts. Since Shinonome-kun would try to avoid even speaking to him, he would throw some candy at the other and, while the shock of having candy thrown at him stunned Shinonome-kun, he would swiftly approach him. Flawless scheme.
Well. Hopefully.
As it turned out, he was right. Well more or less, but- it worked well enough! Shinonome-kun had indeed been stunned and he had been able to walk up to him. Unfortunately Shinonome-kun had quickly recovered, face morphing into a glare, before demanding to know why the fuck you would do something like that, Kamishiro-senpai! Very angrily if he may add.
But, well, it did prevent Shinonome-kun from leaving so it was an overall win (though he will forever mourn the sacrificed candy, because apparently he’s not allowed to eat the floor candy).
Since he did some research, again, no it’s not stalking Tsukasa it’s just Mizuki telling him things, he knew Shinonome-kun’s favorite food was pancakes and cheesecake. And with a little bit more research, of around 2 minutes, he had found a superb pancake recipe, which he typed into his little robot chef at home and voilà, the perfect, well, pancakes. He even made the effort to pack it in a cute lunchbox.
Bribe in hand, he invited Shinonome-kun to eat with him, promising the pancakes. Shinonome-kun, for his part, looked less than thrilled but at the mention of pancakes, his expression melted into something Rui could only describe as ‘conflicted’. Ouch…
Like, sure, he knew Shinonome-kun wasn’t fond of him but he really just wanted to talk! This was not fair.
After a bit more pestering Shinonome-kun finally relented. Rui found himself leading the way to the rooftop, Shinonome-kun a bit behind, still looking reluctant at best, but as soon as he saw the pancakes even that melted a little, completely gone once Rui handed them over.
As they sat down, Rui silently observed Shinonome-kun. His mannerisms still portrayed caution, but there seemed to be a certain level of acceptance mixed in somewhere. Acceptance of what, Rui couldn’t tell, but he hoped it meant Shinonome-kun would stop avoiding him.
After a while Shinonome-kun turned towards him, brows furrowed. “Why exactly did you give me this?” His voice clearly portrayed his distrust and confusion and Shinonome-kun’s eyes darted back and forth between Rui and the pancakes.
“Hmm? Can’t I do something nice for my dear underclassmen?” Truthfully he did want to help the other feel more comfortable around him. He honestly felt guilty for having caused the other a tremendous amount of anguish, even if he did it unknowingly. Despite what he may do to Tsukasa, he would never want to hurt anyone seriously, always taking care to keep his stunts and inventions safe.
“Really? That's it?” Was all he got as a reply as the other started eating, but he was fine with that. While Shinonome-kun's voice still held some scepticism it also sounded like he could believe that Rui truly didn't have ulterior motives.
At that Rui gave a smile, one of the soft ones he knew wouldn't scare Shinonome-kun and nodded, winning him a small smile in return, along with a small “thanks for the food.”
Out of nowhere, Shinonome-kun exclaimed,“You don't need to pity me, ya know?” as he carefully closed the lunchbox, having eaten all that was inside, hiding his eyes under his bangs. Rui, now the one confused, froze for a bit, trying to figure out why Shinonome-kun would think he did this out of pity.
After a while he slowly answered, “I'm not sure what you mean? I don't pity you or anything. Why would I?”
Shinonome-kun stared off for a bit, as if looking for an answer that Rui would like, but after a while just shook his head, muttering a small “never mind” under his breath. Rui wanted to push for an answer but decided that would just be counterproductive to his actual goal. Making Shinonome-kun more comfortable around him. So he just let it go, stowing it away to think about later, content to just spend some time with the other until it was time to leave.
“Yo, Kamishiro-senpai. Thanks for agreeing to come with. I need you to stop me from er… going over budget, buying clothes and all… I mean- it’s not like I’ll get in trouble from going a little over! I just… yeah.” Shinonome-kun rubbed his neck self-consciously, cheeks coloring a little.
Rui chuckled at the sight but quickly answered with a grin, saying, “Leave it to me then~” with a slightly teasing tone.
He had been surprised when he received a message from Shinonome-kun, not having given the other his number, but the redhead had quickly explained that he had gotten it from Mizuki. Then, following the explanation, Shinonome-kun had asked whether or not he had time on Saturday.
While Rui would’ve answered with a negative in a different week, it just so happened that he had run out of materials and couldn’t really work on anything for the time being, so he and Shinonome-kun agreed to meet up, the other wanting to go buy some things as well, but not having found anyone willing to go with him until then.
As the two of them made their way to the shopping mall, they quickly dove into an easy conversation.
Rui learned that Shinonome-kun always had an interest for fashion, that he had thought he would go into competitive football, and the fact he got into music because of Rad Weekend. In return he explained his fascination for Robots, the happiness Wonderlands x Showtime had brought to him, and his interest in platypuses.
“Wait, wait, hold on. Why platypuses?” Shinonome-kun interjected, his eyebrows drawing together in genuine confusion.
“Why, don’t you find them fascinating? They’re mammals and yet they lay eggs! Other than them only echidnas lay eggs and between the two of them, the platypus is clearly superior.” He was only half kidding but at the deadpan stare he received, Rui couldn’t help but burst out into laughter, to which Shinonome-kun gave an annoyed huff, quickening his pace, forcing Rui to speed up as well.
Soon they arrived at the mall, Shinonome-kun immediately going for the clothing stores, while Rui trailed behind, occasionally stopping when certain items caught his eye.
As it turned out Shinonome-kun hadn’t been kidding about needing him to stop him from overspending. Despite his lacking knowledge on fashion, he was near 100% certain that no one needed that many jackets and hoodies, even if you wore multiple at once like Shinonome-kun tended to do, though he did have to admit that, the way Shinonome-kun paired them together, it did hold a certain charm.
In the end, luckily, he could convince Shinonome-kun to leave a few items behind, though the other continued to be miffed about it. Even though he had been the one to request Rui from stopping him!
“So, you hungry?” Shinonome-kun looked at him expectantly and he looked… suspect. There was a slight suspicion building.
“I could eat.” he slowly answered, careful to keep his tone neutral, giving a mental cheer when Shinonome-kun’s face bloomed into a rare genuine smile.
“Great, cus there’s a really good café close to here… uhm… they have really good pancakes? I’ll pay, as a thank you, since you tagged along and all. C’mon!”
Rui gave another mental cheer, congratulating himself as his suspicions were confirmed and quickly followed behind Shinonome-kun.
Luckily they didn’t have to wait long to place their order, both of them ordering pancakes topped with a good helping of maple syrup, whilst Shinonome-kun got himself a large caramel latte and Rui ordered an iced fruit tea with extra sugar.
A big smile appeared on Shinonome-kun’s face when presented with his favorite food and Rui couldn’t help but give a small chuckle, earning him an odd look. He gently shook his head before simply answering, “I couldn’t help but notice how similar our tastes are. You don’t really seem the type to like overly sweet things, Shinonome-kun.”
At those words, the other simply snorted, replying, “You’re one to talk.” After a small pause he quietly added, “And uh… if you want you can just call me Akito. Especially with how much you know about me… and you helped… and so, yeah…”
Rui’s eyes widened in surprise, not having expected those words, but quickly recovered, a soft smile appearing on his face. “Of course, Akito-kun. Likewise you can just call me Rui.” Shino- Akito-kun gave a bashful nod of acknowledgement. His eyes dropped to his plate as he continued eating in silence with Rui returning to his own food. The atmosphere soon settled down into one of calm quietness.
They began to hang out more after that. Sometimes they just talked, but sometimes they played games or compared Vivid Bad and Wonderlands x Showtime shows. Rui hadn’t thought so before but he noticed more and more how deep Akito-kun’s fears really ran. Initially he had just thought it may have been the description within his script that had triggered Akito-kun’s panic attack but now, spending more time with him, Rui thought that perhaps it was more like the subject hit too close to home for the other and he dearly hoped that his building suspicion, that Akito-kun may have or may even still be hurting himself, was wrong.
He hadn’t been given a concrete reason for his suspicion yet, so he was unsure if he should ask just to be sure. The most reason he had for his suspicion lay in the way Akito-kun talked about himself compared to his group mates.
Where he endlessly praised Shiraishi-san for her strong voice, Aoyagi-kun for his song writing skills and Azusawa-san for her quick learning curve and amount of confidence she could instill in others, he just said that he was okay and that he could do better.
Rui of course understood that some people weren’t as good at praising themselves like others, but he still thought that the stark contrast was… concerning? From what he had heard, Akito-kun was good . Of course, as with anyone, there would always be room for improvement, but still he thought it was harsh at best to say that the redhead was just okay.
But that was really all he had, so instead of confronting Akito-kun about his suspicion with the shaky evidence he had, he wanted to learn more first, make sure he actually had sound reasoning first, frustrating as it may be.
But even with that Rui was at a loss. How do you learn about something so personal? Of course he could just carefully dissect every sentence Akito-kun spoke, but in the long run it would grow tiresome and Rui wasn’t sure he would be able to learn enough in that fashion.
More and more it seemed like all he could do was try to ask.
The thought distressed Rui. Akito-kun was never known as the most open person and Rui really didn’t want to lose whatever easiness they had now.
And then it clicked. If he couldn’t ask Akito-kun about his fears and insecurities, then he’d just have to ask someone who’d known him longer than anyone else, his sister.
Mizuki wasn’t at school that day, so during his break he sent them a quick message, asking for Shinonome-san’s number and explaining that he had to ask her something.
Luckily Mizuki quickly responded with the number, though they did warn him that Shinonome-san had night school, so he shouldn’t expect an answer until late, to which he sent back a sticker, thanking them.
With that he composed his text to Shinonome-san.
Hello, Shinonome-san, Rui Kamishiro
from school here. I got your number
from Mizuki, hope that’s okay.
I know this might be a strange question
but could you tell me what Akito-kun is
afraid of or insecure about?
If not that is perfectly understandable.
Thank you for your time!
A bit awkward but whatever. The text conveyed what he wanted, so that would suffice.
To pass the time, Rui pulled out his blueprints and started building different designs. All together they would be used to create some ghostly illusions, hopefully enhancing the backdrops of Wonderlands x Showtime by imbuing them with a bit of life.
When he was finally satisfied with how things looked and worked, it was already well into the night and checking his phone he saw that Shinonome-san had already answered him, he had simply missed it, completely engrossed in his work.
Ah, Kamishiro-kun, I think
I remember Akito mentioning you!
To answer: I don’t think Akito is insecure
of anything. I mean why would he be, right?
Anyways, he’s terrified of dogs! Pretty
ridiculous, huh?
Hope that answers it.
After reading through the message, he thanked Shinonome-san, but he still felt unsatisfied with that answer. He would love to believe that Akito-kun wasn’t insecure about anything, but it didn’t really fit with what he saw. One thing was clear to him now. Whatever the insecurity was, it must’ve been quite personal to Akito-kun if even his sister didn’t know. That in mind, Rui decided that for now, he would just have to keep his eyes open for any red flags and until any cropped up? He would stay quiet about his suspicions. It wouldn’t help anyone, if he freaked Akito-kun out by unnecessarily pressing him on it.