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Kuroo looked at the clock on the wall and yawned. Finally the long awaited lunchtime began.
Today’s classes were more tiring than normally and Kuroo had trouble to stay awake. He thought he was done for when the fourth period began and his eyelids refused to stay open but he kind of managed to stay awake. God knows how.
Kuroo stretched himself before he stood up from his stool with his usual cocky grin on his face and grabbed his lunch. He walked zigzag around his classmates, careful not to bump into someone while heading towards Kenma’s classroom.
When he finally reached the door he suddenly stopped in his track. He usually went to see Kenma this time around to eat with him or to steal some food from him on which the shorter one gave him always a disapproving gaze but today was different. The last three days were different.
Kenma stayed at home due to a terrible cold and wasn’t being able to go to school since then.
The last couple of days Kuroo hadn’t be able to see him. Even if he went to his house, Kenma didn’t open the door and would just send him a text, saying he should go home and that he would only catch his cold too.
All of his late night calls and promises, he would be careful didn’t convince him. He was strong-willed and stubborn just like his mother.
Kuroo let go of the door handle and went back to his seat. He thought about eating with Yamamoto and the others but decided against it. He didn’t really feel like it for today.
He opened his bento and started to shove some food into his mouth. Everything tasted unusually insipid as he slowly chewed on his lunch until his appetite vanished.
“Habits are scary.” He mumbled to himself without a smile, putting his fork on the table.
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“Kuroo! Watch out!” Yaku shouted from behind but Kuroo was too late to react. A ball flew straight into his face before he had even the chance to dodge it.
The captain let out a loud cry at the impact as he fell on the ground. Everybody ran up to him and build a small circle around Kuroo, watching him with worried expressions.
“Are you alright?” Yamamoto held out a hand and helped him up again.
Kuroo lifted his head and looked him in the eyes, his body still a little stiff from the shock.
“Yeah. Don’t worry. It’s not the first time I block the ball with my head.” He answered with a slowly rising grin while patting the other ones shoulder.
“That’s right, it’s not but that’s already the fifth time for the day.” Yaku furrowed his brows and sighed. “I take Kuroo to the bench. The others should go back on the court.”
Nobody disobeyed him as he led the raven haired boy over to the other end of the gym. Not even Kuroo himself. He knew exactly when he couldn’t win against their mothe- against Yaku even with his position as the captain of the team.
“I warned you to stop spacing out.”
He pushed Kuroo gently down on the bench and gave him his water bottle and an ice pack. Kuroo took a mouthful water and pressed the ice pack on his cheek. The cold sensation felt good against his sore skin.
“Sorry, my mind somewhere else.” Kuroo slowly closed his eyes and went through his hair with his free hand.
“Can it be that your mind was somewhere by a certain blond Setter with big and golden eyes?”
The Libero’s expression turned somewhat softer and he took the ice pack away from Kuroo’s face to pull him up.
“I really think you should go home and see Kenma. You’re like this for days now.” He let go of Kuroo’s wrist when he was standing on his feed and let out a long sigh.
“Since Kenma isn’t attending practice you just stumble over your own feed, you space out all the time and I even lost count of how many times you already blocked the balls with your head this week.”
Kuroo exhaled and went through his hair a second time. This time with more force.
“Maybe you’re right. It’s just that….. it’s just that I worry too much about him. I mean I didn’t see him for days now. What if he is feeling worse?”
Yaku’s eyes widened and he opened his mouth to speak up before he stopped his words.
“I know.” Yaku spoke instead with a reassuring smile. “It must be hard for both of you.”
The captain took a few steps forward and stopped to turn his face around until his eyes met Yaku’s once again.
“I think I should go and pay my ill and lonely cat a visit.” A self-assuring grin rose upon his face. His usual self-assuring grin.
Yaku chuckled and clapped him on the back.
“Do that.”
He watched the back of their Middle Blocker getting smaller and smaller until it disappeared behind the door of the locker room.
When Yaku was sure he wouldn’t hear him he whispered to himself, eyes still glued on the door where their captain vanished behind.
“Aren’t you the who is feeling lonely?”
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Kuroo slowly walked home. His hands were hidden in his pockets to keep them warm and he nuzzled his face against his inner jacket to keep the cold air away.
As he made his way through the snow he suddenly missed a certain small hand that he always held when it was freezing outside. A hand that held Kuroo’s as if it was the only source of warmth for him.
Kuroo shook his head and tried to concentrate his thoughts on something else than Kenma. On school, on volleyball, on the match in spring, just on something that wasn’t him. He really tried but in the end it was completely hopeless.
When he thought about school, he also thought about lunch and if Kenma was eating enough at home.
When he thought about volleyball, his mind wandered to his precious Setter who was still sick at home.
When he thought about the match in spring, he also thought that spring in Japan would be getting cold and wondered if Kenma would catch another cold.
Kuroo sighed. No matter what he tried he couldn’t get Kenma out of his head. Not for a second.
“I’m really such a worrywart.” He sighed, mumbling to himself.
His steps were getting slowly heavier as a sickening feeling rose inside of him again. There it was again. That heavy feeling inside of his chest as if something would crush him from the inside.
He grabbed his cell phone in his pocket and exposed his hand to the cold air before he began to text a certain somebody.
Kuro: >> How are you feeling?
Kuroo exhaled and felt better when he finally sent the text. Even though it was just a short message, he felt so much better just knowing that something connected the two right know.
A big smiled rose upon his face when Kenma replied to him just a couple of seconds later.
Kenma ♡: >> sick
Kenma ♡: >> Shouldn’t you be at practice?
Kuro: >> I was but I spaced out and Yaku sent me home :(
The raven haired boy clenched his phone tighter as if to prevent that someone could steal the moment between the two away. A moment he missed so much.
Kuro: >> Are you able to come to school tomorrow?
Kenma ♡: >> Don’t think so.
Kuro: >> Hey, can I come over?
Kenma ♡: >> No.
Kuro: >> Why not?????
Kenma ♡: >> You know why.
Kuro: >> Ohhh comeee ooonnnn~
Kuro: >> I never caught a cold in my whole life!!!
Kenma ♡: >> No.
Kuro: >> Kenmaaaaa~
Kuro: >> Please~
Kuroo frowned and was getting desperate. He wouldn’t give up. Not this time. He could feel the sickening feeling return and his fingers which were clenching his phone started to hurt.
That was when he noticed it.
Kuroo stood still and just stared at his display with wide eyes.
The reason he felt down lately and spaced out all the time wasn’t just because he was worried about Kenma. He felt lonely.
That crushing feeling he felt was because he missed him.
It was not Kenma’s cold that would make him ill if he went to see him. Being apart from him made him ill. That was the sickening feeling he felt for days now.
Without realizing it the corner of his mouth rose themselves into a full smile and he began to type again.
Kuro: >> Hey
Kenma ♡: >> ?
Kuro: >> Did you know that cats can die of loneliness?
Kenma ♡: >> ……
Kenma ♡: >> Since when can you feel lonely?
Kuroo snorted. If Kenma knew just how lonely he could get without him he would laugh.
Okay. He wouldn’t. He definitely wouldn’t but Kuroo needed to laugh. How could he have not notice sooner?
Kuro: >> I always am when I can’t see you
Kuro: >> Kenma
Kuro: >> Kenmaaaaa
Kuro: >> Kenmaaaaaaaaaaaaaa~
Kuro: >> Please, I feel like I really could die here
Kuro: >> Kenmaaaaaa~
Kenma ♡: >> Fine.
With that one message Kuroo started to walk again.
Kuro: >> I’m coming.
Kuro: >> now
He put his cell phone back into his pocket and started to walk faster and faster until his legs started run on their own. His lungs started to hurt from the cold air but his smile never left his face. He just really wanted to see Kenma right now.
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When he finally reached Kenma’s house he was completely breathless and sweat was dropping down his face. He pressed the doorbell carefully and waited. When he didn’t hear any steps or noises from the inside, he pushed the door handle down and went inside. (Luckily it was open but he needed to scold Kenma later for not properly locking the door.)
Mrs. Kozume was nowhere to be seen and was probably out. Kuroo was thankful for that. He didn’t want to be send away again when he made it that far already. He slipped out from his coat and shoes and made his way upstairs.
When he reached his room, Kuroo opened the door without knocking, overcoming the last hindrance that kept them away from each other.
A familiar pudding head showed from under the blanket. Kuroo smiled softly and went closer to the bed.
“Morning. Did you miss me?” He sat down beside Kenma and watched the figure slowly removing the blanket.
With swollen and big feline like eyes Kenma stared at him as he sat up and spoke his name out with a soft voice.
“Kuro.”
At that moment Kuroo’s heavy feelings burst out of him and he leaned forward to hug the person in front of him.
He swung his arms around Kenma’s waist and buried his head in his neck.
“I missed you, Kenma.” He spoke quietly, trying not to scare him with the words that sounded almost as desperate as his hug felt like.
Without making any noise, Kenma moved his arms around the others shoulders and started to caress his back.
“I missed you too.”
He could feel the heat of Kenma’s body slowly warming up his own body. He didn’t know if it was because he was cold or because the Setter's body was just unusually warm due to his high temperature. Maybe it was both.
Kuroo gently moved his hand to go through Kenma’s silky hair and God how much he missed that feeling. He would give everything away if this moment would just last forever.
It felt good. It felt right. Like the last couple of days didn’t even happen. Like the sickening feeling inside of his chest didn’t even exist from the beginning.
“Kenma, I mean it. A cat can die of loneliness. If you’re not there I will die.”
Kuroo pressed him tighter to his body and exhaled. He felt free and all the heavy feelings he felt the past few days vanished. They disappeared just like that.
For both it was the first time they were apart from each other that long since they met.
Of course Kuroo didn’t notice that he was lonely. He never felt lonely before. Kenma was always by his side. He didn’t need to feel lonely.
Kenma slowly broke apart from the hug and laid himself back on his bed. Strangely, Kuroo got the feeling as if something was missing now even though Kenma was right in front of him.
“Come here.” With a soft voice that sounded like a whisper, Kenma lifted his blanket and patted the spot beside him.
Kuroo didn’t need be told twice. He laid down under the blanket beside Kenma and drew the other one closer to his body. He placed his one arm under Kenma’s head as a pillow and let the other arm lay around the Setter’s waist.
He could feel his own body being already relaxed as he put his chin on the Setter’s head. The sweet smell of apple’s reached his nose and made him smile. He closed his eyelids and leaned in further into the cosy feeling.
“When you’ll feel better for today I will make us something to eat. For some reason I’m reaaally hungry.”
He squeezed Kenma tighter and placed a kiss on his forehead.
Kenma buried his head further into Kuroo’s chest and hummed in response.
When the blond could feel the even rhythm of Kuroo’s chest as it went slowly down and up, he closed his eyes and clenched his fists around his sweater.
“Kuro, I also think that a cat can die of loneliness.”
It was the first time both were apart for that long since they met and both hoped that it would also be the last time.
