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Language:
English
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Published:
2022-07-29
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576
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1/1
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6
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87
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bachikin learns how to use a rice cooker

Summary:

she's trying her best ok

Work Text:

it was 4am and bachikin was hungry as fuck because she had been up all night and if dysfunction was a company she'd be the executive. but god forbid she have the spoons to bother to cook a fish or something and the cabinet didnt have anything she could just grab and snack on because of course it didnt. she paced around the kitchen a couple times, occasionally checking the fridge again in hopes that food would magically spawn. unfortunately the laws of thermodynamics were not kind to her and also that's not what thermodynamics are???

so anyways her potentially magenta orbs(?) behind her square shaped sunglasses gazed upon a simple device on the counter. she could cook rice with this bachi, she thought. looking around the cabinets again because she forgor where the hell the bag of rice was she spotted a box and took out a pouch. stuffing it in the machine she closed the lid and waited.

"ah...why isn't it cooking, bachi?" she wondered aloud

it was not cooking because the machine wasnt even turned on. looking the device over she found a button and pressed it. nothing. she pressed it several times. nothing. suddenly she remembered something very important about cooking rice.

"oh wait i need to add water bachi"

unfortunately all of the cups were in the sink because why would she take the time to clean them?? she had better things to do right now, like cook some tasty tasty rice. picking up the unplugged device she held it under the tap and turned it on, filling it with water. placing it back on the counter she pressed the button. nothing.

tired as balls she sank to the floor. all she wanted was some rice!! her stomach grumbled sadly :(
holding her knees she gently sobbed for an hour straight because she's been having a hard time lately and this didn;t help

in her sobfest her eyes drifted towards the accursed device. the plug. it wasn't plugged in.

"im a damn idiot, bachi" she said rising to her feet. taking the plug in her hand she put it against the outlet, then flipped it around because it was upside down before it fit into the socket.

the light on the machine sprung to life in an amber orangey color idfk. with newfound confidence she pressed the button and the machine began to gurgle. satisfied, she sank to the floor again to lay down and wait before drifting off...

the land of dreams was unkind to her. jeraldy was back and he had an evil rice cooker. she was evil again too, and whoever ate her evil rice also turned evil. something about a parrot. marikin was straight.

suddenly she heard a harsh tone that shook her from her dream.
jumping to her feet stubs and summoning her barrel guns she opened fire on the attacker and screamed as the smell of gunpowder and melted plastic filled the air.

"BACHI BACHI BACHI BACHI BACHI BACHI BACHI BACHI BACHI BACHI BACHI BACHI BACHI BACHI BACHI BACHI!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!"

sigkin kicked open his bedroom door scythe in hand and lavender nightcap on head, "WHAT THE FUCK?! ARE WE UNDER ATTACK??"

his eyes trailed to the wreckage. he had eyebags upon eyebags.

"what the FUCK happened to the coffee machine?!"

"I THOUGHT IT WAS A RICE COOKER BACHI!!!!!!!!!"

"WE DON'T HAVE A RICE COOKER DUMBASS," he shouted, "YOU BROKE THE LAST ONE!!"

"oh right bachi"