Archive of Our Own ^beta

When Luz was fourteen, she promised herself that the only time she would write letters- love letters - was when she found someone worth writing for. 

Every year, she wrote letters to her mom on occasions she deemed special. Every spring, she would write one letter to her dad. She’d tell him about her life, about the people she’d met, and about what she wanted to do when she was older. Afterwards, she would lay the letters down on his grave, pinned under a small rock.

Luz never thought about what would happen to the letters.

When she met Eda during the last weeks of her first year in high school, that time she went on a vacation trip with her mom, she started writing letters to her. Meanwhile, she had the chance to play with Eda’s son, King. Then she went on a studious adventure in the nearby libraries with her Aunt Lilith. On the way, she met Willow and Gus.

The list of the people she loved grew and grew.

So did the letters.

But not for long.

One time, she was crushing so hard on this guy- Nevareth - and she wrote her feelings down. The next day, she tried handing it to him during break. She didn’t really know what she was expecting, because Nevareth just laughed at her and handed the letter over to his jock friends. They read her letter aloud in a mocking manner, in front of the whole student body within earshot, and not only did he humiliate her, but he also  broke her heart.

High school drama was the worst, Luz recalled. Everything you do was scrutinized- when you dress like them, they have something to say. When you don’t, they still have something to say. When you speak, they murmur. When you don’t speak, they murmur even more. So when they mocked her, Luz’s classmates whipped their heads and started to agree with him.

Luz vividly remembered clinging to the self-control she had left, lest she jumped on him and beat the crap out of him. Or get beaten- but at least it would have felt good. For the moment anyway.

She transferred schools after that school year. Her mom got a new job in a lively city out of Connecticut and they high-tailed out of there. The city, it turned out, was Bonesborough.

Businessmen bustled around and street vendors were everywhere. There was a large library in the center of the city, and cafes situated next to the universities. Unlike the quiet of the night in Gravesfield, the people here never seem to sleep; there was a night market that captured the main road and it was like a carnival of colors, rides and things Luz has never seen before.

Luz definitely didn’t miss Connecticut when everything she wanted was right here. She could always visit her dad once in a while during break; Luz was sure her mom would never miss his anniversary.

So to summarize, Luz was happy.

But she stopped sending letters. 

Not because she was closer than ever to Eda and her friends, but because she thought Maybe it’s true, maybe she kept doing it so many times that it wasn’t special anymore. So people wouldn’t appreciate it anymore. They had phones, wifi and social media. She could just tell them all what she felt through text; it would take less effort than writing ink on paper.

She had a bunch of those unsent letters hidden under the foot of her bed- in a dusty shoe box with a faded logo of Adidas. They were organized alphabetically; and before Luz left her old house, she was certain she would need another shoe box soon because she never missed a month of writing them-

Except she didn’t.

She stopped writing cheesy and sappy stuff altogether when she got to college.

“What are you going to major in?” Gus asked.

It was during the semester of their senior year, just a few months before August and before Luz was going to college. They were seated on one of the bleachers. Luz’s eyes trailed absentmindedly on the players in the field. Hexside had a tradition to hold a game between the high schools around the city and right now, a lot of the students were squeezed in the bleachers, where they jeered whenever another team took the ball from the team they were cheering for.

The boos got louder whenever Hexside stepped onto the field.

That was probably because number four always kicked their butts whenever she was playing.

Like, right now, Luz was looking at her intensely.

“English Studies in Language,” Luz replied distractedly.

Number Four dashed through Glandus’ defenses and scored a goal in just two minutes upon entering. The person next to Luz jumped out of their seat and screamed so loud she had to cover her ears. When the excitement died down and halftime came up, Willow spoke over the noise.

“Are you planning on taking it in Hexside’s Main University?”

“Man, I’m not ready to leave this place. It kinda sucks I skipped two grades, but I know it’ll suck even more if I transferred out. At least I kind of already know the people that’ll take psychology with me.” Gus complained.

Willow chuckled and butted in, “I hear that Glandus’s Botany program was top-notch. My dad went there before, so I’m looking to get a reservation soon.”

“I’m going to St. Epiderm,” Luz blurted out. She played with the hem of her green aviator jacket as she explained, “Eda’s partner works there. Also, I’ve read some of their students’ papers before and I really want to be just as good as them.”

She refrained from mentioning that she also picked that school because her favorite book author also went there. Luz could worry about job opportunities later.

It was a bit hard to carry the conversation when they kept getting pushed and shoved by people who grumbled about wanting to see more of the game. When Luz got annoyed by the incessant pushing of one of the freshmen behind her, chanting memorized cheers for Hexside (which is why Luz let it slide), she excused herself and said she was going to get a drink.

Which she did.

She walked through the winded path that led through a grove where everything became a distant buzz in Luz’s ears. There were two vending machines behind the school building, and she could see the faint glow even before she reached the tree line.

There was someone crouching in front of the blue vending machine.

When Luz got closer, she could see that it was one of the soccer players. Her green hair was unmistakable. She was talking to herself, and Luz could tell that her tone was angry.

“Stupid vending machine,” the stranger murmured. “I just wanted a drink.”

Apparently, the vending machine didn’t give her what she wanted.

Luz watched as the player shook the machine in frustration. Her dyed hair was tied up into a ponytail, with some of the free strands sticking to her face. Her pink top was drenched in sweat and her socks were covered in dust. The number 04 was printed on the back of her shirt. Her brows were furrowed and her lips jutted out in a pout.

Luz didn’t know how long she was standing there, mesmerized by the person’s stunning good looks. She knew her name was Amity. It was hard not to know her; she was the talk of the school, both good and bad.

Some say she was a priss, others were awed by her mind.

Luz never had any classes with her, but she knew what it was like to be the subject of rumors, true or not.

Luz fidgeted awkwardly, debating whether to turn back and walk away or help. The girl looked so tired though, so Luz shrugged and coughed to get Amity’s attention. She was startled when Amity jumped and cursed. She whipped her head to point an accusing finger at Luz.

They leveled each other with a stare, having stiff shoulders and guarded expressions. Luz was pulled in by the other girl’s eyes; the moonlight illuminated her pretty well, and Luz could’ve sworn she saw the stars reflected in her pupils, as if they were dipped in gold. It took another resounding cheer from the field to jolt them out of it.

Amity composed herself, eyes darting around before they settled on Luz.

“Do you need help?” Luz offered.

Amity tilted her head, puzzled. Before she shook and pointed at the vending machine.

“I don’t think you could help.”

What a way with words.

“I mean- sorry, that came out wrong.” Amity bit her lower lip. “I’m not…good with words. I meant to say that this machine is bogus and I think the school is just collecting money from it without dispensing anything back.”

Luz tried not to smile at that. Amity may say that she wasn’t good with words (with tones), but she could tell that this girl held her tongue back a lot. Luz heard her in a debate competition once, she remembered the girl tapping her fingers against the wooden table in front of her, before she stood up and raised points that were difficult to argue with.

She would be a good politician.

“Yeah, the blue vending machine likes to get stuck. But I figured out a way to get it to push out the stuff-” Luz approached the machine, and she kicked it as hard as she could on the side.

In a moment, they heard a thud!

Luz inserted her hand into the machine’s opening and pulled out a purple gatorade. She handed it to Amity, who looked stunned.

“...That’s a violent solution, but I’ll take it.” Amity bit back a smile. She put out her hand and reached for the drink and the moment their fingers brushed against each other, Luz couldn’t contain herself.

“I know this is a sports drink but like, are you supposed to have juice in the middle of the game?” Luz blurted out.

“Not that I’m judging you or anything- I guess you were really exhausted after that last goal, and not that I’m wondering why you’re all the way out here when there could be drinks in the iced box by your bench but-”

Amity laughed.

How dare she have a beautiful laugh!

She had bags under her eyes and her skin looked ghostly pale. Her lips were almost white and she must not have drank anything since the evening started. Luz knew that was dangerous especially when she was out there, sweating like crazy.

“It’s fine. They uh, didn’t have enough water bottles. Or I might have been too deep in thought to notice that one of the juniors took two of them and left me with nothing.”

Luz blinked as Amity sighed. She looked absolutely exhausted.

“Boscha told them it was fine, that I was like a machine and I was used to it.” Amity muttered bitterly. “It’s unfortunate but I guess that’s how people see it when you’re a leader.”

The hurt laced in her voice filled Luz with sympathy. Amity must not have anyone to share that with if she was telling Luz, whom she's never even talked to.

“That sucks.” Luz replied. “Let them play the game without you, then. If they blame you, raise the water bottle incident as a defense.” She joked.

Amity snorted.

“Oh, please. They’d definitely blame me. I’ve been playing since we were up against Camp Wittebane’s Golden Guards. The least they could do was play the finals without me.”

Luz hummed in agreement. She expected the conversation to end there, without her even introducing herself. She gave Amity a genuine smile before she turned and placed two coins into the red vending machine.

She picked out a blue gatorade and a water bottle.

The evening air became chilly, and Luz adjusted the beanie on top of her head to cover her ears. When she turned back, she saw that Amity was watching her.

“Isn’t your team going to look for you?” Luz chuckled.

Amity shrugged. 

“I’m graduating in a few months. They’ll have to get used to not having me around.”

Luz laughed. She offered the water bottle to her, and Amity’s eyes widened.

“You need actual water in your system. C’mon, I’ll walk you back.”

Luz pushed the water bottle gently into Amity’s chest, before she walked off, not wanting to see the other girl’s reaction. But Amity recovered quickly and caught up to her, eyebrows raised.

“You can’t say you’re walking me when you were headed back there in the first place, Luz.”

Somehow, Luz felt like they were old friends. Amity was comfortable to be with; her voice was like music to her ears. Luz tried to ignore the hard pounding of her heart in her chest, the familiar flutter of butterflies in her stomach, and the red flush on her cheeks.

When they got close to the field, Amity waved to her shyly, signaling that she had to go back to the bench, where substitute players and their coach were waiting for her.

Luz waved back with the gatorade in her hand.

“I’ll see you around, Noceda.”

She straightened her posture, golden eyes became steely and cold like the night air, before she turned and confidently walked towards the field. When she made her appearance, Luz could hear the cheer of the students louder than it was before they came back.

That night, Luz felt like someone had stolen a piece of her heart.

It was that very night that Luz brought out her favorite pen and a piece of bubblegum pink paper, and had written her first and last love letter before she entered college. She wrote about starry eyes and dyed hair, of gentle smiles and beautiful laughs, and cold drinks that made the night warm.

When she finished folding the letter, she realized that Amity knew her name without Luz ever telling her.

I made conversations with the moon

About how breathtaking you were.

I whispered to the stars,

Poetry for the muse who has been dancing in my mind.

-

“In 2018, Bonesborough witnessed a deterioration of its ability to provide the economy with the skills needed, which points to a mismatch between school curriculums and the demands of companies…”

Luz paid attention as her classmate read out her paper. From the corner of her eyes, she could see people pass an envelope under the table. When it reached her, she stuffed the envelope in her backpack as subtle as she could. She tapped her foot against the tiled floor impatiently, waiting for the minor class to end. Darius, their professor for this course, sat idly in the corner, brows raised as he listened.

This wasn’t a major class or anything; but the government required that they take world history and some other kind of unrelated course to fill in the gaps for their needed units. Luz ended up enrolling in this course.

She wasn’t expecting any familiar faces really; that was until she entered class one day (she woke up late) and when she stepped inside the room, she saw someone she never thought she’d see again.

Amity sat in front of her, chin rested on her palm. Her other hand held a pencil and she jotted down stuff at random. Luz didn’t know if she was actually paying attention or if she was pretending to.

Unlike the days before summer vacation, where her hair was a teal green, her hair was now dyed lavender. Luz knew St. Epiderm was strict when it came to uniforms (for certain majors), IDs and hair dye , but Amity was probably not in any of the courses that disallowed it.

Honestly, she rocked this hair way better.

When Amity saw her during their first day, Luz could’ve sworn her eyes lit up as she waved. Luz smiled back and out of sheer nervousness, she ended up shooting her a finger gun.

She wanted to die out of embarrassment.

After the night they spent together, Luz was hoping to see more of her. But the different friend groups and the looming deadlines for the requirements of their graduation got in the way. When Luz told her friends about it, both Gus and Willow made a face, telling her that if she tried talking to Amity during the day, she’d probably get ignored.

She still had nightmares about that time people in the hallway laughed at her for handing out a love letter to a jerk.

So she nodded and kept her distance.

Now, it made it awkward for her to just walk up to Amity and strike a conversation.

So she just sat behind her instead.

Luz didn’t know if Amity’s slumped shoulders were an indication that she was disappointed, but she decided not to think much about that.

“Ms. Blight,” Darius said dryly, “You’re next.”

His tone sounded like he detested Amity’s last name, but then again, he always sounded like he hated his job.

Luz saw Amity’s posture go rigid.

“Dear God, I hope you don’t talk about capitalism like your mother did when we were your age.” Darius sighed exasperatedly.

Damn, Luz thought. He must really hate Amity’s mom.

Luz didn’t have any classes with Amity in high school. She didn’t know what she was up close- but now she could see Amity’s stoic expression waiver slightly when she went to the front of the class, hands grasping the side of her skirt tightly until her fists turned white. Darius’ words must’ve gotten to her more than she let on.

Silence enveloped the room as people looked at her expectantly, and Amity’s last name was whispered around in the air, as if it were an incantation. Briefly, their eyes met and Luz’s heart almost stopped. 

She swallowed her nerves as Amity blinked at her owlishly. Looking for something.

Encouragement, maybe?

And Luz didn’t know if Amity actually needed it, or if Luz just wanted to help- whatever it was, it urged her to hastily open her notebook and scribble Go Amity! Before positioning it to the side where Darius couldn’t see her raise it up.

When Amity’s eyes fell on the paper, Luz could see a ghostly smile on her face.

Then she began what was probably the most interesting critique Luz had ever heard in her life.

“We talk so much about history being factual,” Amity started. “But not enough about how it has been proven to be wrong over and over when new information is reached.”

Her voice was steady, and the room was so tense that Luz was sure it woke up the sleeping students in the back.

“Historical revisionism has been a thorn in our side. We were set to believe that the founder of Bonesborough was none other than Phillip Wittebane. That he saved us from what he called savages and that he started a revolution that brought the city prosperity for years to come.”

Luz scoffed. That guy looked so sus. No politician is that trustworthy.

“Those are lies,” Amity said Luz’s thoughts indirectly.

Now that caused an uproar. But Amity’s steely gaze combined with Darius’ Be quiet! Made them shut up.

“He created a system that made us believe it was helping us grow as a community, only for him to actually use it to influence the people- the masses mostly- into re-electing more of his descendants to continue the governance of his system which should have been abolished in the 21st century.”

Earlier, Darius looked bored as hell. Now, when Luz glanced at him, she thought she saw a proud expression on his face, probably entertained at how Amity kept answering the questions thrown back at her smoothly.

Amity turned to a girl who raised a question.

“It is important to question everything you hear, and everything you read. If you could question me about my stance regarding this topic, then I hope that each of you learn to question everything you read in your books and especially online. Don’t just ask, but learn to find the answer as well.”

By the end of her paper, Luz clapped loudly that those who hesitated at first rode on her enthusiasm and clapped with her.

When the bell rang, everyone rose from their seats, still disgruntled by what they’ve heard and they stumbled out of the classroom in a hurry. Luz took her time, waiting for the classroom to empty out before she followed, only to be stopped by Darius.

“I don’t know whether to praise you or to feel stressed for you.” Darius started. When Luz looked at him in confusion, he waved his hand.

“Writing five papers is a serious feat, and about different topics too.”

So she did get caught.

“Why do you never turn me in?” Luz asked, curiously.

Darius rolled his eyes.

“I would rather read whatever you’ve written than spend my time reading what they could have written. Please, you and Ms. Blight are my only source of entertainment in this class. Now, shoo.”

Luz didn’t argue. She hurried out of the room, passing by the group of students who were probably Darius’ next class. When she turned the corner though, she ended up bumping into someone.

With honey lavender hair.

Oh.

The girl of her dreams.

Ehem.

They stared at each other, unblinking. Luz didn’t know why, but her face started feeling hot. Some of the students behind Amity stopped in their tracks and they grumbled before avoiding them and shooting them dirty looks. It took a guy mumbling Excuse me before Luz realized that they haven’t said anything in awhile.

The apology was already on the tip of Luz’s tongue when Amity spoke before she did.

“Thank you, Luz.”

She tucked a stray lock of lavender behind her ear and Luz caught a glimpse of an undercut when she did. Holy crap.

“Uh-I-I should have drawn a mini-you for good measure.” Luz stuttered out.

Luz didn’t think it was possible for Amity’s eyes to twinkle even more and make her heart pound so much that it hurt, but it was.

“You draw?” Amity asked.

Luz didn’t trust her mouth so she nodded, hands gripping the strap of her backpack tightly. But her lips betrayed her because Amity’s expectant eyes made her talk.

“I’m not that good- but um…It could’ve helped you more. Not that I think you needed any more help! You were perfect! Your report was perfect! It’s perfect!” Luz stuttered.

Amity chuckled. She seemed to be enjoying Luz’s company (she assumed anyway) and although the hallway was crowded and noisy, Luz could only focus on the girl in front of her. The moment between them was short-lived though, as Amity’s eyes darted down to her watch and she frowned and looked at Luz apologetically.

“Sorry, I have to go. I’ll see you on Thursday.”

Luz thought that was the end of the conversation as she nodded and waved, but before Amity could get far, she turned back and smiled mischievously.

“You’re a good writer, Luz. But maybe you should let them write their own thoughts next time, then it would be more fun to crush their spirits.”

She left after that closing statement, with Luz gaping after her.

It wasn’t like Luz kept it a secret, but to keep the teacher from finding out, students always have this unspoken agreement to keep something like this private in case someone would be a tattletale. 

She used to hear about how Amity obsessed over grades and ratted people out to teachers when her classmates would do something similar with their homework.

But if she had known for months, Luz wondered why Amity had put up with it so long.

-

The next time Luz ran into Amity, was in the city library.

Funny enough, St. Epiderm had a whole building dedicated to being a library. Or maybe it was an archive of books? Luz didn’t know how to describe it. There were five floors, with shelves perfectly lined up in every corner of the rooms. Two whole floors were dedicated solely to medical and law students’ needs. Long tables filled the empty spaces from the entrance to the back. Computers were all up and running, hidden behind the last row of shelves. 

Students sat at every available chair, and whispered chatters filled the air. Luz guessed that it wasn’t because they were here to read books, but more about using the school’s wifi. 

It was her first time using the library since the semester started a few months ago. But just as soon as she entered the premises, she left the building just as quickly. Unfortunately, Luz found out that St. Epiderm lacked the two essential things that would make her day: fiction and fun.

She had a two-hour break until her last class, so she went to explore Bonesborough. Specifically, the city library. It wasn’t as if she hadn’t been there before- heck, she’d been there plenty of times since the first time she moved to the city- it was just so weird to do it without Gus and Willow.

Hexside was two train trips away, and Glandus was out of the question.

Apparently, Luz can do only so much in just two hours.

She sighed as she walked through the deserted streets. Students were in school, the market was three blocks away, and she wasn’t really expecting any person to be close to the library. Heck, Gravesfield’s library was practically used by ghosts. And that creepy guy who was way obsessed with finding proof about how the founder of the town was actually a witch.

The city library was huge. It stood on a stylobate of three steps, with high columns and pointed rooftops. A sad purplish red coated the building, faded over time. The entrance was through an archway, around nine feet tall. Luz didn’t know if they were expecting any Goliaths to visit, but oh well- it looked straight out of the medieval ages.

When she entered the old building, she was greeted by a guy who looked much more ancient. His eyes were a deep, electric blue. Lines decorated his face, and what seemed to be a permanent frown was plastered on his lips. He raised a brow at her, probably wondering why a teenage girl was walking inside during a school day. He wore a worn-out polo shirt, with a nametag on the right side of his chest: Malphas.

Luz was into books, but when she was with Gus and Willow, they were usually in the botany section or the “forbidden” conspiracy section. Now, she kind of wanted a sappy, romance novel that could suck out the dryness of the school out of her.

And she usually had that at home.

But home was too far down the opposite road from here.

She approached the help desk, trying to keep her chin up and chest puffed out in fake confidence. Malphas’ eyes studied Luz as she shifted uncomfortably from one foot to the other. One glance at her identification card though, made a difference. Malphas stared at her in interest as he pushed his glasses back to the brink of his nose.

“Are you here to help with the kids’ field trip?” He said gruffly.

Confused, Luz could only answer, “I-What?”

He shook his head and muttered some words that Luz would rather ignore. He gestured to her ID as if Luz was supposed to understand whatever he was implying.

Luz bit her lower lip and raised her hands in defense.

“Look man, I’m just looking for the fiction section.”

“So you are here for the kids. Go through the arc and turn right. Your partner has been waiting for two hours. Her mother has quite the temper. I hope for your sake, she’s more like her dad.”

Puzzled as she was, Luz decided not to answer. Instead, she headed straight to where Malphas pointed. She looked around and wondered if they updated their booklist and added new fictional books in their roster. There weren’t many people around, but there were a few teens like her, who were deeply engrossed in whatever they were reading.

When she got nearer to the arc, she heard some hushed voices, and laughter. She peeked through the empty space between the books on the shelves, and found a spacious room, with kids sprawled out on the carpeted floor.

“Hecate was pulled deeper into the depths of the ocean as Azura screamed. The witch dove after her, reaching out desperately so that Hecate could take her hand.”

The kids screamed in horror and Luz wondered why the person reading to them would choose that part of book five.

That’s just cruel. Luz thought jokingly.

She watched as some kids jumped to their feet in frustration, while others hugged their seatmates and tried to keep their tears from falling.

“Miss Amity, why did the author write such a thing?!” A little boy with freckles and red hair exclaimed.

Luz blinked.

Amity.

AMITY?

She stepped out of her hiding place to get a closer look, brows furrowed and mouth agape. The book reader was definitely the Amity she knew.

She sat on a purple bean bag, lavender hair cascading like a waterfall on her shoulder. She was wearing a sleeveless muscle tee, with a purple monster printed on the front and tucked into black, knee-ripped jeans.

Oh, my God look at her arms!

LOOK AT HER ARMS!

COTTON CANDY HAIRED GODDESS-

When Amity put the book down and looked up, pausing at the question thrown at her, Luz placed a hand on her chest and fisted her shirt. She could feel her face heat up immensely as she saw how Amity wore round glasses and at how she smiled at the kids.

GLASSES-

“Hm. I don’t know, Braxus. Maybe they thought that the characters needed a push in their development and a life-threatening situation would have probably helped with that.”

She shrugged before closing the book. Clasping her hands, she said, “We’ll find out what happens later. Let’s take a five-minute break!”

There was a mixture of boos and yays, before the kids scrambled to go do their own thing. There were around twenty kids in total, and Luz realized that they could fill the library and make it sound fun to everyone who could hear their high-pitched voices.

Some pushed past her as she stayed rooted in place, still staring dumbfoundedly. Amity’s shoulders slumped as she sighed and slid down the bean bag. Her hand went up to massage her temple and she mumbled some words that Luz could probably guess as I love this job but it takes too much energy.

Definitely was not what she was saying, but oh well.

Luz debated on whether she should go and say hi, or go on her way to the romance section for what she came here for. She didn’t expect to run into Amity, but God, did she want to stay here now that she knew she was here. But she looked exhausted, which made Luz feel a bit disappointed because it might not be the best decision to greet her.

But she decided too late because Amity spotted her from across the room.

“Luz?” She called out.

Immediately, Amity got up and looked at her with wide eyes. Luz made a noise that sounded a lot like eep! She looked around before she feigned surprise and waved.

“Oh, Amity! Hey, uh, didn’t see you- Well, I did, but like, you were busy and I was listening-” Luz waved her hands around, “But it was because I knew what book you were reading from, not trying to be creepy!”

Amity looked at her, amused. Probably for the nth time. She was hugging the book to her chest as Luz blabbered more about how she had nothing to do so she went to the library and yada yada yada.

“But it’s uh, nice seeing you here, accidentally.” Luz finished.

Amity snorted.

“Right.”

She didn’t believe Luz.

Before she could defend herself further, Amity stopped her with a knowing look. She pulled out her phone and checked the time before she sighed. She glanced at Luz before she gestured behind her.

“I work here. I don’t have afternoon classes on Fridays so I volunteer to read to the kids. I have to go back now though.” Amity summarized.

She looked apologetic and Luz didn’t want her to go yet. When she said goodbye, Luz didn’t know what she was thinking when she blurted out something to stop Amity in her tracks.

“I do the best monster voices!”

Amity turned back and blinked twice.

“Huh?”

Luz was internally screaming and she could feel a blush coming again, so she took a deep breath and rubbed the nape of her neck.

“I uh, heard that your partner didn’t come so I want to fill in their shoes. If um, that’s alright with you.”

Amity’s face hardened. She rolled her eyes and clicked her tongue.

“Oh, yeah. I don’t know who that person is but they probably just volunteered and signed up so they could put something in their paper or something. It’s stupid.”

Oh, geez, Luz sighed in relief. For a second, she thought Amity didn’t want her to interfere. If she said that, then Luz would get out of there and try her best to be as invisible as can be in their shared classes. Amity was usually cold whenever she was annoyed or someone she didn’t like approached her back in high school.

Amity looked deep in thought. Luz nervously waited for her answer as she twiddled with her thumbs. Amity was a little bit shorter than her, but she had the presence of a damn lion. She glanced behind Luz just as the kids spilled into the room again and she smiled.

“Make sure to not scare the kids too much with your monster voices, Noceda.”

Luz’s heart stopped.

Metaphorically!

“I-of course! I’m a master!” Luz joked and felt the tension leave her shoulders.

She walked towards Amity, who straightened her posture. Her ears were red as Luz smiled at her and they headed back to the center of the room together.

“Alright, we have a guest speaker for today!” Amity called out.

Quickly, they crowded Luz as Amity muffled her laughter. At some point, Malphas passed by to check on them and he gave Luz - she assumed- an approving nod. They took turns reading, side-by-side and matching each other’s energy. Everyone seemed enraptured by the story, or the way they told it anyway.

The whole time, Luz was distracted. She could see Amity in the corner of her eyes, laughing and lightly scolding the children when they became too much. There were moments that Luz had to suck in deep breaths every time Amity brushed against her side, reminding her how close they were sitting on the carpeted floor.

She lost track of time until her phone buzzed, signaling that she had to go back to school. Luz frowned and fished her phone out of her jacket’s pocket. There were less than forty minutes for her to walk back and get to class.

But she didn’t want to.

“I’m having too much fun, I don’t want to go to class.” Luz mumbled to herself.

Amity raised a brow and stopped reading the lines out.

“Don’t you dare skip. I’ll feel like it’ll be my responsibility and I will have your head if you fail.” Amity retorted.

Luz raised her hands in mock defense. 

“We just got to the part where Azura finally saves Hecate. You having my head in front of the children is ironic.”

Amity rolled her eyes and shoved her gently.

“I’m saving you from failing grades.”

So Luz readied her things and said her goodbyes to the kids. She felt guilty leaving the work unfinished, especially when Amity had been here for hours with minimal breaks. So she thought of something that wasn’t that crazy and wasn’t really inspired by wanting to spend more time with Amity Blight (lies).

“Can I see you next Friday?” She asked, pretending to look at her phone screen just so she couldn’t see Amity’s reaction.

“I mean- I could come help you. Take care of these uh, children.”

They could be our children. Her mind piped in.

Shush. Luz replied.

“O-Only if you want me too, though- I think they liked my monster voices!” She exclaimed and looked at the children she technically adopted for support.

Some of them looked at her in amusement, the others in confusion, and the ones left were grinning and wiggling their brows.

“Yes, Miss Amity! We want her to stay here!” Braxus replied.

“Stay forever! Stay with Miss Amity, Miss Luz!” A blonde with twin buns added.

“ No! Miss Amity should be the one staying with Miss Luz!” Another kid piped in.

Amity gave them a look. It was a cross between amusement and what the hell, you guys. They listened as the students argued in hush tones. While they were distracted, Amity nudged Luz and got her attention. There was a mischievous glint in her eyes before she shoved the book in Luz’s hands. “ I would’ve said yes without you looking for the kids’ votes, Luz. So yes, please stay forever. ” 

Her ears felt hot. She stuck her tongue out playfully and glanced at the book. There was a piece of paper sticking out of the top. 

Before she could question Amity, the girl stood up and clasped her hands.

“Okay, who wants to go to the forbidden section?”

“WE DO!” 

Luz tried to keep a smile on her face as Amity said her goodbye and ushered the kids out. So she took the piece of paper and stuffed it in her pocket and left the building. Maybe Amity didn’t want to talk about it, and Luz didn’t want to assume what it was but to keep herself from overthinking, she just went on her way, headphones in her ears.

She arrived in the classroom five minutes before the teacher could enter. She sighed in relief before she settled down in the front desk of the room and that was when she remembered the paper that Amity had mysteriously slipped during their time together.

So she took it out of her pocket and unrolled it.

Here’s my number. Tell me if you want to meet up every Friday to have the book club.

-AB

That night, Luz couldn’t sleep. So she got up and took out a pen and a paper. But unlike the thousand words that formed in her mind to describe her day with Amity Blight (Which only gave her a headache),  she could only put down the few that plagued her since the first time she met her.

I want to qualify as a candidate for your heart.

-

“You want me to write a letter?” Luz asked.

She was sitting alone in the cafeteria when somebody she wasn’t well-acquainted with dropped by and literally dropped her tray on the table in front of Luz. Her hair was dark as midnight and she wore a scowl on her face as if she couldn’t live without it, and her eyes were a glaring orange.

Luz knew her. From the architecture department. She played against Amity during high school. The former captain of Glandus’ soccer team, and also someone Luz never liked the moment she first saw her. 

Her name was Bria.

“Yes.” She gritted her teeth.

Luz raised a brow. She’s asking me to write a letter, but she’s here getting all rude.

“I heard from a mutual classmate that you’re a good writer. I want you to write a love letter. Understand?”

She leaned back on the chair and fixed Luz with an awfully haughty stare. Luz heard her loud and clear. Her eyes twitched as she frowned. Even if she still wrote letters, she wouldn’t do it for someone else.

How was she going to write a letter for someone she didn’t have feelings for?

“I’m sorry, I don’t write letters. Plus, you want a love letter, that should be done personally.” She replied, standing up and getting her bag.

Bria stood up as well, and protested. She reached out menacingly and grabbed the strap of Luz’s bag. It was a bit aggressive and Luz tensed up. Luz narrowed her eyes at her, hands balled into fists. She wasn’t planning to make a scene, but if Bria started something it wasn’t as if Luz  couldn’t not do something.

“Wait! I’m sure you could do it, letters require writing and-and you do that! I’ll pay you handsomely if I have to!”

That made Luz slightly change her mind.

She didn’t really need the money. She was on a scholarship and her mom was doing quite well at her job- Eda was also helping her out so Luz didn’t have to worry about it. But what made her stop to listen was the desperation in Bria’s voice.

She must really like this person.

Luz looked at her wearily.

“What do you have to offer?”

“Five hundred bucks.” Bria said, confidently.

Luz almost choked. When Bria said handsomely, Luz didn’t really think she’d go that far all for a love letter. Bria sat back down, letting out a defeated sigh. Luz stared at her, head tilted and brows furrowed. She didn’t really trust this woman, not even one bit.

“Look, I took up architecture for Pete’s sake!” Bria rolled her eyes. “Writing is more of your forte and she’d probably be more appreciative of an amazingly sweet letter! Who doesn’t like sweet letters?”

You’d be surprised, Luz wanted to say.

Then again, Gravesfield was filled with jerks; Bonesborough had its fair share of terrible people but they were mostly appreciative of unusual or unique gestures. Eda didn’t hug people before until Luz started embracing her, and the woman had looked at her all weird and puzzled. Luz guessed that the culture here was a bit more different than where she came from.

“-Hello? Luz? What do you say?” Bria leaned in, wide-eyed and expecting.

Luz blinked.

“I uh-” Luz stuttered. “Why don’t you just draw a portrait of her?”

Bria’s eye twitched. She leaned back and sighed.

“ Luz. This girl is my classmate. Do you know how brutal it is in our major? They tear up our plates and give us less than half the points to pass for every drawing. What if I drew her and she sees all of the mistakes instead of appreciating it?”

Luz didn’t know what plates meant in architecture jargon, but Bria did have a point. Bria sank lower in her seat and stared at the table.

“You know,” Luz said slowly. “If she doesn’t appreciate it, then you deserve so much better.”

Someone probably less of a jerk to balance you out. Luz thought to herself.

To her surprise, Bria scoffed. She crossed her arms and rolled her eyes. At this point, Luz’s fight or flight response was about to be activated and she was leaning more on the fight response more.

“ Please. She’s from a well-off family who owns the rights to most of the technology used in Bonesborough and Latissa. I have to get on her good side or at the very least- marry into her family so I could be set for life.”

That set Luz off.

“Okay, I’m out.” She said.

Luz took her things and bolted. She thought Bria actually liked someone but she guessed that the former player was too self-centered to even care about another human being. Luz could hear Bria calling out to her loudly and even angrily. She ignored the call-outs and curses as something twisted in her stomach and aggression boiled in her insides.

No one deserves to be used. Luz thought.

She thought about Amity; about how people used to flock around her and how Boscha stuck to her like glue just because both of their families had connections to each other. She thought about how people wanted to be her friend so they could get favors and become popular-

Where does popularity even lead you to?

Political favors?

More like political and social problems afterwards.

She wanted to write for someone special and for herself. The people Luz wrote for deserved every letter and every word of love. She couldn’t bear writing for someone whose only motive was to obtain wealth and a person like they were an object.

Luz didn’t realize that her blank march led her all the way to the gym. Raindrops fell against the roof hard and it mixed with the loud shouts of the volleyball players practicing on the court.. Some people were sleeping on the bleachers, while some couples were sitting in the corners, doing err, things Luz would rather turn away from.

Then she spotted her.

Amity was on the very top, near the windows. They led to narrow paths which were connected to nearby classrooms for easy access. Amity’s classroom must have been one of them, or she just liked being here because there were less people than everywhere else.

There was an open book on her lap and she was staring blankly at the players, and Luz wasn’t sure if she was actually here or if her mind was in a far away place. Before she could think clearly about it, she already started walking in Amity’s direction.

Once again, Luz could feel a blush appearing on her face and she pulled on her beanie out of sheer nervousness. Amity’s hair was tied up today; it reminded Luz of that time they first talked under the moonlight. She wore an oversized purple sweater and black, skinny jeans.

“Amity-” She squeaked out before she covered her mouth.

Startled, Amity moved her legs and almost dropped the book in her lap- from this angle, Luz could see that it was a sketchbook. She smiled encouragingly before sitting down a few inches away from the other girl.

“Luz?”

“Fancy meeting you in the gym.” Luz joked.

Amity recovered from the surprise and laughed. She placed the sketchbook down between them and she looked at Luz like she was trying to figure something out. Luz could feel her heart quicken before she looked away and focused on the players on the ground.

“I like it here.” Amity spoke. “The library on campus is always full. My classmates are noisy so I can’t concentrate, and this place is almost deserted.”

Luz could still feel her eyes on her, and she swallowed before she looked back to stare into those eyes. Those goddamn eyes. Amity smiled at her and raised a brow and Luz wondered if this is how she smiles at her other friends.

“...I used to watch you from over here.” Luz blurted.

She went back to watch the volleyball players, just in time to see the libero slide on the floor to catch the ball. Amity hummed beside her before she scooted closer. From up here, the pouring rain was louder and it made Luz’s head spin.

“Oh?” Amity prompted.

“Yeah!” Luz grinned. “You were always covered in dirt though, and you had a snarl on your face every time. I think you always try to intimidate them so they’d back off.”

Amity shrugged at her observation. “Maybe. It’s a good tactic, honestly.”

That’s gotta be good enough for small talk! Luz thought.

Their class with Darius wasn’t until tomorrow, and their secret library meetings (as Luz liked to call it) wasn’t until the day after. Luz did have her Penstagram and they chatted, but mostly for schedules and if Luz was brave enough, some random memes she found on the internet.

“I never got to ask, but what’s your major?”

“Well, that took you half of the semester to ask. I’m from the College of Engineering and Architecture.”

“Why architecture?”

Amity tapped her finger against the open pages of the sketchbook. Luz glanced at it to see that it was blank. Maybe Amity was experiencing an art block.

“My dad likes to create things. My mom…” She paused and wrinkled her nose. “She does whatever she can to sell inventions. You remember Emira? She’s a medical student but she does whatever in her pastime. Edric is studying to become a vet. But he’s planning to take pharmacy afterwards. I like to draw and create something that could last forever.”

She raised her hand to draw something in the air and Luz watched as a pale finger with black nail paint traced the squiggles on the rooftop. She talked about monuments and architectural designs that sounded fascinating since it came from her, and Luz listened.

“I want to go to Europe someday,” She continued. “Or just, every country that has some sort of history with architecture.”

She turned the pages, showing Luz some kind of structures that were familiar, and new.

“-Sorry, this must be boring you.” Amity apologized.

She was about to close the sketchbook when Luz’s panic set in and she grabbed Amity’s hand.

“No!” Luz exclaimed.

She turned her body to fully face Amity and she leaned in, eyes determined and skin red and hot from being so close to the other girl. Amity took in a sharp breath before she bit her lower lip and leaned back, ears flushed.

“Huh?”

“You-I-Look, Amity, you’re really cool but I’ve barely heard anything about you from you. And I want to get to know you. Since high school. Since I first saw your green hair and thought to myself, Oh, hey, it’s like Azura!”

She remembered seeing Amity once when she berated Willow at some point the first time Luz came to the city. She remembered her green hair and thought she was kind of cool, until she almost got  all of them in trouble.

Then Luz stayed far away.

But when things calmed down and Luz had taken a good look at her, she thought, Hey, maybe she also read the same series that I did! How cool would that be? It was a long shot but it was kind of Luz’s thing to hope in things with low probability.

That’s called optimism.

“...Until I realized that green was a Blight thing.” Luz finished dully.

Amity raised a brow. She glanced at their hands as she asked, “So you knew me that night you kicked the vending machine?”

Luz stared at her in disbelief. 

“Amity, how can anyone not know who you are? You’re kidding me right?”

She talked about how famous Amity Blight was in high school- how she was untouchable, cool and the top of her class. She explained how Amity intimidated other people, how good of a captain she was in the soccer team and how teenagers paved the way in the hallways whenever she and her clique passed through.

Amity took the sketchbook back in her lap and stared at it blankly. She scribbled random lines in it as silence took over. It made Luz uncomfortable and she went over her words again to see if she’d said something wrong.

And then she was reminded of what people used to call Amity. Used to think about Amity.

Now she felt bad.

“So you’ve heard of me.” Amity spoke softly as the rain turned into a drizzle. “But you still gave me water nonetheless. You drew a cute sign to support me in class. You liked reading The Good Witch Azura and did it with me.”

I wrote letters to you after first meeting you! Luz’s mind added.

I imagined confessing to you and you returning my feelings and then we do girlfriend stuff together! Probably her heart added.

“Yeah.” Luz replied curtly.

“Why?”

Why.

Suddenly, Luz’s thoughts became a jumble of words. Words to describe Amity because how could Luz not do any of that? How can anyone not do that? Then there were words to describe her feelings. Then there were memories of when she wrote letters to people she-

Oh.

Amity stopped scribbling. She stared at Luz expectantly, as if she knew what she was about to say. Luz probably did too, but she felt her throat go dry and her palms become clammy. She bit her lower lip and fidgeted.

What am I supposed to say?

The truth.

Luz had a hypothesis that humans would choose to lie when put in a defensive position.

Did you know that a book said that the truth will set you free? Her mind asked.

Apparently, it was easier to deflect than to admit.

The way Amity was looking at her was intense. It made Luz feel warm all over in the middle of the rainy weather. She leaned in slightly, her hand between them and almost brushing against hers.

Luz couldn’t breathe.

“Someone asked me to write a letter to a person she liked.” She confessed.

That wasn’t what Amity expected because she almost slipped after leaning in. She furrowed her brows and gave Luz a puzzled look.

“What?” She asked.

Luz laced her fingers together. It wasn’t what she wanted to say- it wasn’t where she wanted the topic to head to, and she could detect a hint of disappointment in Amity’s voice. But she was already on a roll.

“She-She said she was from the same college as you actually! And at first I was considering writing to whoever it was she wanted to give it to. Just to help out. But then she said something really mean and didn’t actually like the person she wanted to give the letter to.”

Amity nodded her head and gestured for her to continue.

“She wanted to use that person. I didn’t want to be involved in that.”

“Because?”

“Because-”

Because that person owned most of the technological advancements and rights in two big cities. She could kill me if she found out I had a hand in it.

“Luz?”

No, that wasn’t the only reason. Realization dawned on her face. She clenched her fists until her knuckles turned white. She swallowed the lump in her throat and shakily took a deep breath to calm herself down. 

Playing against each other in high school.

College of Engineering and Architecture.

Technology.

Blight.

“...Because that girl was you.” Luz finished quietly.

Amity’s brows were raised, as if she wasn’t surprised by Luz’s answer. She should’ve realized the connection sooner and now she was worried whether she hurt Amity’s feelings or opened up terrible wounds.

The sound of a whistle jolted her out of her spiraling thoughts.

“So she wanted you to write me a letter.” Amity said slowly.

Luz felt bad- felt guilty even if she didn’t do it.

“I said no. No one deserved being given a heartfelt letter by someone who didn’t even have a heart.” She spat.

Amity hummed. She closed her sketchbook and put it back inside her bag. She seemed tired; there were bags under her eyes now that Luz was looking at her closely.

“How would you have even written a letter addressed to someone you didn’t know?” She asked after the brief moment of awkwardness.

Luz didn’t expect that question. But Amity had been breaking her expectations since the beginning.

“Well, I’d probably use flowery words I didn’t mean. Which would’ve made me feel worse.”

“And if you knew?” Amity pressed.

Luz sighed and laid back, using her backpack as a makeshift pillow over the cold and hard cement. She stared up at the bright lights in the gym, before she closed her eyes and hid them behind her arm.

“I would never do that to you.”

Amity didn’t speak after that. She let Luz wallow in her thoughts, with eyes squeezed shut. Her bag was right next to Luz so she would’ve felt it if the other girl decided to get up and leave. Instead, Amity was quiet the whole time and Luz waited for her to say something.

She didn’t know how much time passed. She’d been with Amity for around thirty minutes; maybe it had been an hour already. Or maybe more. She listened to the rain. She listened to the players on the court, yelling at each other. She listened to anything other than the loud beating of her heart.

Amity spoke just as the bell rang and resonated throughout the building.

“So you wouldn’t write me a letter?”

Luz’s eyes fluttered open. She got up abruptly and whipped her head to look at Amity. She wasn’t looking back, but had busied herself with fixing her things. She was moody, expression dark and cold. Luz was somehow sure that she had something to do with it.

Luz didn’t write letters. Not anymore.

Not many of them like she used to.

But the urge to fix things gave her an adrenaline rush.

“I don’t write-” Luz shouted over the ringing. 

But I would! I would tell you the things I can’t tell you right now- I’m bad with words too, you know! But I’m better at writing and I could answer your questions and they’ll be complete answers!

Amity bit her lower lip.

She glanced behind her, at the door that led back to the classrooms of her department. The bell stopped ringing, but the chatters of the rushing students filled the air and it was too noisy for Luz’s liking. Amity sighed.

“I’ve got to go.” She paused as she turned away. “You can tell me more the next time we can talk.”

Amity wasn’t always direct, but Luz hoped that what she said didn’t have an underlying meaning of just the opposite.

Because they never have enough time to talk.

With that, she was gone and Luz was devastated.

-

“ Mija, are you okay?”

Two days.

First, Luz waited until after Darius’ class finished before she headed for Amity’s table. But the girl moved faster and excused herself, saying she had to pass a very important project today. What was humiliating was that Darius had seen what happened. He raised a brow and beckoned to Luz just as everyone else had left.

“Did you and Miss Blight break-up?”

Luz grimaced. “We weren’t together, sir.”

Darius looked sympathetic. He shrugged it off and told her to go on with her day and that everything will be cool soon.

Sooner than her father and I would make up, at the very least. He said.

Luz asked how long they’ve been fighting.

Since we graduated high school. Twenty-four years ago.

That wasn’t reassuring.

The next day, Luz was already on her way to the library when she got a text from Amity saying she called in sick so it was canceled.

Get well soon. I could get you chicken soup if you want?” Sent 3:45 pm.

Thanks, Luz. I’ll be fine though. Sent 4:00 pm.

Amity didn’t want to talk.

That made Luz sad.

She was laying on her makeshift bed, staring at nothing, when her mom came in. They were supposed to get an actual bed when they first moved in, but Luz decided that she liked having the mattress on the carpeted floor. Plus, she could fold it up for more space if she needed it.

“ Sí. Estoy bien. ” Luz waved her hand.

Her mom didn’t leave. She sat down at the foot of the mattress, and Luz glanced at her. She was still in her uniform, indicating that she just got home. There was worried expression on her face as she gazed at Luz.

“I don’t think you are. Quieres hablar acerca de ello ?” Her mom asked, softly.

Luz loved her mom. She couldn’t lie to her, and when she did, she did it badly. Sure, there was stuff they had to go through when Luz started closing up and stopped giving her letters, but they always got through whatever angsty thing she had going on in her life.

Luz wondered what her mom did with all the letters. Though she always thought that it was better not knowing the results rather than seeing them and getting crushed afterwards.

Now it was different.

“Mami, what did you do with all the letters?”

Camila tilted her head. Luz sat and stared at the floor. She never asked- never wanted to know- and it was always in the back of her mind. She used to agree with Willow, whenever she said Out of sight, out of mind. 

But not thinking about it made her feel worse.

“I kept them in my nightstand.” Camila answered. “I read them every night. Every time I get tired of working.”

Luz gazed at her tiredly. “You do?”

Camila ruffled her hair and squeezed her cheeks. Luz chuckled and held her mom’s hands in hers.

“Of course, I do! I had to reread them because you stopped writing me new ones.” Hesitantly, she continued. “I always wondered if you stopped because…you started resenting me after I…tried to get you to go to summer camp.”

When Luz was younger, she was told by her peers that her trauma wasn’t valid. She could just get over it- she could’ve just not cared. But it was easier said than done for someone like her. Everyone back home knew each other and they always thought that she was weird, that she had no place with them and that she was too cheesy.

She caused trouble, she went to the summer camp where they taught her practical life skills that was super boring because she had to learn taxes and write business letters. She had to do a ninety degree turn away from what she wanted to do.

It didn’t stop people from thinking of her in a certain way though.

She didn’t want anyone else to think the way these people did.

She didn’t want Amity to think the way they did.

Camila seemed to have picked up on what she was feeling. Luz told her that it wasn’t like that, that she didn’t stop writing until they left Gravesfield and that she still had unopened letters for her mom hidden somewhere in her room.

“Oh, mija. Sometimes you think of things in a certain way, but you’ll realize that it isn’t always like that.”

Camila pulled her into a hug and Luz buried her face in her chest, lips quivering and body trembling.

“Maybe you just haven’t realized it but you’ve already found the people who love the things you do. Because they love you too.”

-

Luz took a deep breath.

It was nearly December- around a few weeks have passed since Amity started focusing more on her studies. She stopped sneaking glances and waving at Luz whenever she passed by her desk in their only class together. Her eyes were downcast and there was a hard frown on her lips.

She left Luz on read on most days.

Not like Luz was sending messages other than memes though-

Well, whatever-Luz stopped trying. If Amity wasn’t going to talk to her, then she can find some other way to tell the girl everything she kept bottled up since high school.

She stayed up night after night, thinking of what to say- thinking of how to say it.

She had a lot of words she could use to describe Amity’s cotton-candy hair. She could talk about how strong Amity had to be in front of people- or about how Luz had always wanted to befriend her but chickened out. She could tell her how so many people tricked themselves into ‘being in love’ with Amity and confused it with admiration and awe.

She could talk about the library incident. She could confess and say that Amity had already built something that could last forever inside Luz.

And all those drafted letters that filled up Luz’s desk had to be summarized into just one.

Since, well, she couldn’t give Amity a scroll.

She memorized the College of Engineering and Architecture’s schedule. She bribed Bria to tell her what block they were in since she mentioned that they were classmates.

The semester was ending and finals were due.

Darius said that Amity was going to have a special exam because it clashed with a major subject’s schedule.

Now, Luz was waiting for her to finish her exams.

She had a pink envelope in her hands. From the tiny windows, she could see Amity in the front, furiously writing something down and Luz wondered how they did exams in this department. She just knew that there was a lot of math involved.

That would probably put most people in a bad mood.

It was nearly five-thirty. Luz watched as students exited the class, until there were only three left. She was so concentrated on Amity that she failed to notice the others glancing at her questioningly. Suddenly, there was a tap on her shoulder.

When she looked down, she saw Bria staring up at her with a suspicious look.

“Noceda,” She said, crudely.

“Oh, it’s you.” Luz replied.

“So what are you, a non-architecture student, doing staring at my classroom in particular?”

Her voice sounded way too sweet . Luz could immediately tell how fake it was, and she guessed that it was because there were a lot of people around and they weren’t that aware of what a devil she could be.

Or maybe they knew about her despite the sickening voice she uses.

“Waiting for someone.” Luz answered.

Bria gave her a leveled stare. She frowned, eyes narrowed and hands balled. There were two boys behind her, nervously glancing around like scared puppies. Luz didn’t know whether to call them Bria’s friends or her slaves.

“Bria, we should go.” The taller of the two mumbled.

“No.” She answered firmly. “I’m waiting for Amity Blight so I could give her the project I’ve worked on for weeks now.”

She grinned crookedly and gave Luz a mocking bow. She pulled out some kind of wrapped canvas out of her sling bag.

“I have to thank Luz. She would really love to see me give it to Amity. Isn’t that right?”

Oh, this bitch.

Was Luz supposed to be flattered that Bria took her advice? Because she felt absolutely insulted right now. Bria gave her a knowing look, testing to see what she would do after that statement. There was tension in the air as they studied each other. Luz’s body was stiff while Bria crossed her arms and tilted her head as if to challenge her.

“Luz?”

Luz snapped out of it and saw Amity standing just outside of the classroom door. There was a mix of confusion and anger on her face. She turned her head to give Bria a once-over before she glanced at the envelope in Luz’s hands. Her face hardened.

Oh no. No, no, no.

“Is that for me?” Amity said coldly. It wasn’t clear to whom she directed that question to.

“I-It’s not what you think.” Luz stuttered.

“What am I supposed to think ?” Amity replied, harshly.

Luz blamed it on the math.

She tuned out Bria’s chatty voice as she explained. She didn’t know if she was making sense, but Amity looked very angry and Luz wasn’t doing a good job putting out the flames. Her face turned red, which also made Luz’s shoulders slump.

What a way with words she had.

Stupid timing.

“Look, just take it. Read it or throw it away. Up to you.” 

Luz handed her the envelope. Amity just looked down at her outstretched hand. Her heart sank lower and lower every minute that passed when Amity just stood there and said nothing.

When she didn’t take it, Luz was reminded of what happened in high school all over again. She blinked back the tears. There were students watching the scene unfold. Luz was probably not going to come back to their department any time soon.

Fine then, I’ll do it myself. She thought bitterly.

That was when Amity grabbed her wrist. Her eyes were calculating and tired as she gazed up at Luz. 

“Give me an hour to recuperate. We can talk somewhere far away then.” She mumbled.

For some reason, that made Luz feel less embarrassed. Amity patted her wrist before she waved and turned away. Just as she did though, Bria swooped in and took up her space. Annoyed, Amity hastened her steps and raised a hand as if to tell her Not now.

Okay, Luz wasn’t that desperate.

An angry Amity was like an angry cat, set to destroy everything in sight.

But maybe she wasn’t totally angry- because when she turned the corner where Luz couldn’t see her, her phone buzzed inside her pocket.

Meet me in the city library. Sent 5:40pm

_

Luz was all for secret library meetings.

Secret being, nobody else knew they were there; she wasn’t exactly expecting Amity to have an actual secret room in the library.

When she arrived, Amity was already there, with a coffee in hand. She was by the entrance and Luz approached her with heavy footsteps. She opened her mouth to speak but Amity made a gesture for her to be quiet and led her inside, towards the romance section. Then she opened a hidden door behind the shelf by pulling out a worn-out looking book. That was probably to make sure no one else would pull at it- but Luz would. At some point before she found out.

“That is so cool.” She whispered to herself.

“That’s because I’m cool.” Amity replied nonchalantly.

At least she sounded calmer than earlier this time.

She stepped inside and gestured for Luz to follow. The room was small; there were shelves on the corner, bean bags near the wall, a circular carpet on the floor and a coffee table in the middle. Above them, starlights decorated the ceiling.

Luz had so many questions- if Malphas knew about it, if anyone else did, how does Amity keep anyone from finding it, if they could ever use it as a romantic spot-

“Sit down, Noceda.”

She sat down.

Amity stared down at the coffee in her hands while Luz fidgeted in the bean bag. Her jacket made some noises as she moved to get comfortable (which wasn’t working). She tried to look busy because this was the first time they’ve been alone since the night Luz talked to her.

It was so weird.

“Sorry about earlier.”

Amity’s voice filled the empty space, soft and genuine.

“You told me someone wanted to hire you to make a love letter. So when I saw you two, I couldn’t help but overthink.”

She took a sip of the coffee. The smell of almonds wafted through the air and Luz kind of wished she could drink without her stomach dying on her. She thrusted her hand into her bag and pulled out the canvas Luz saw with Bria earlier.

“She gave me this.” She glanced at Luz. “But I’ve never known her to be thoughtful or sweet. Was this your idea?”

How sharp. Luz nodded.

“Great. Now I can’t even call it a thoughtful gift.” She bit her tongue and placed the canvas on the coffee table and faced Luz again.

“I’m feeling kind of sorry that she stole your idea.”

“It’s fine, Amity.” Luz waved her hands animatedly. “I don’t really care what she does. I was just waiting for you so I could give you the letter. Since-well- we haven’t talked in so long.”

Luz panicked when Amity almost choked mid-drink. She coughed and oh boy, they’ll have to clean up the spilled coffee later on. Luz stood up and clapped her back (although she wasn’t really sure if that helped or made things worse).

“Oh God- I’m sorry about that too. I’m not good at keeping people close.” Amity wheezed.

That would explain why she didn’t keep any of her ‘friends’ from high school. Luz shook her head and rubbed her back in a comforting motion. She took the letter out from her jacket’s pocket and handed it over to Amity.

“I’ve been meaning to give you this.” Luz muttered. “I’ve been trying to write for weeks.”

This time Amity took it from her hands and stared at the crumpled envelope. She studied it from front to back while Luz stood behind her.

“You wrote me a letter.”

Luz raised a brow. “Yes, that’s what that is.”

Amity elbowed her in the stomach. Her eyes were narrowed and her lip jutted out into a pout. 

“You said you didn’t write letters.” She sulked.

“I did before.” Luz corrected. “Not anymore.”

She sat back down just as Amity opened it and Luz’s nerves lit up on fire. But Amity just skimmed through it before putting it back in the envelope. Her foot tapped against the floor as she took a deep breath. Luz waited for her to gather her thoughts by playing with the rings on her fingers.

“You wrote a letter to Willow once.” She stated.

Luz almost fell out of her seat. 

“How did you know that?”

Amity stared at her like, Really? 

“Luz. You wrote it in the library. I’m always in the library.”

She gawked at her. Her cheeks flushed as her hand went to rub the nape of her neck. Yeah, she should’ve thought about that possibility before. But they didn’t know each other back then so it wasn’t as if Amity could have been interested in what she did- but apparently, she did.

“Wow, Blight. I didn’t think you stalked people.” She teased.

She was expecting Amity to turn red like a tomato; to stutter and throw something at her in embarrassment. Instead, her brow quirked as she tucked a loose lock of lilac hair behind her ear.

“I don’t, Noceda. Just you.”

Amity loved messing with her, she just knew it. Luz scoffed and brushed imaginary dust away from her jacket before she slid back against the bean bag. Her skin was on fire and she didn’t know if Amity could tell how flustered she made Luz feel.

Instead of continuing the teasing though, she changed the topic.

“You didn’t sign it.”

Luz shook her head. No, she didn’t. She decided that if she was going to give Amity a letter, she wouldn’t risk her knowing who she was if she chickened out and decided to slip it in her bag or have someone deliver it. You know, the dramatic way to do it.

“You do realize that if you ever agreed to write that love letter directed to me, I would’ve known and probably killed you on the spot?” Her voice was calm.

Luz was offended. “Why me?”

“Because you would’ve made me believe that you were in love with me. You  would’ve broken my heart.” She sounded annoyed.

Luz gaped at her. Amity went on complaining and gesturing about how Luz was always in the corner of her eye, never straying too far. She talked about how loud Luz was in the hallways to the point that it turned heads, including hers. She recalled seeing Luz in the library, writing her heart out-

“You weren’t being very subtle with it-”

“What do you mean I would’ve broken your heart?” She interrupted.

Amity froze. The room became eerily silent that if someone had dropped a pin, it would’ve made a loud noise.. From outside the walls, they could hear a bit of muffled voices. Luz concentrated on it rather than on the pounding of her heart.

“I didn’t say that.” Amity denied.

“You did.” Luz insisted.

“You misheard.”

She stood up, and so did Luz. Amity glared at her, daring her to open the topic again. It was out in the open, Luz was curious- always curious - she would never let this go. She stepped forward while Amity took a step back.

“Amity- what do you mean?”

Her eyes darted from Luz’s face to the door behind her. Luz caught up to her plan so she stretched out her arms as if she were a basketball player blocking the enemy. Her expression read, You’re not getting away.

Amity scowled. Her whole face turned tomato red.

“I’m angry at you.” She scoffed.

She averted her gaze and glared menacingly at the floor. Luz was never on the other side of Amity’s infamous glowering. It was actually kind of cute seeing as Amity was smaller than her.

“I’m sorry if I made you angry.” Luz said gently. “But you haven’t read the letter in full. I promise you it won’t break your heart.”

Amity sat on the floor, hugging her knees to her chest. Her brows were still creased in anger and she clicked her tongue in dismay. Luz sat with her.

“I’m angry because you wrote a letter.” Her voice was a bit muffled.

Luz was a bit miffed. First, Amity looked like she was about to cry when she asked her if she would’ve written her a letter. She kind of ignored her for weeks while Luz tried. Now that she saw Luz write a letter, she was misunderstood and now she’s mad.

“I don’t know what you want.” She said, quietly.

Amity buried her head in her arms. 

“It had to take someone to tell you to write a letter before you did.”

Huh?

Amity leaned towards her side, kind of trapping her in place. Her voice was hoarse and shaky. Luz could tell that she was trying not to cry. About what, she didn’t know.

“When Willow and I were in the same class, she would read your letter. She’d smile and I got curious about what it was. I didn’t know you back then, you haven’t moved into Bonesborough yet.”

“When Boscha tried to take it from her, I saw who signed it.” She grimaced. “I got it back, of course. I was terrible, but I wasn’t that cruel.”

She looked up at Luz. “You didn’t sign this one.”

Luz gave her a dumbfounded stare. “You’re mad about that?”

Amity sighed and shook her head. She mumbled something along the lines of being so bad at words. She pointed to the shelf, where the collection of The Good Witch Azura series was neatly placed side-by-side.

“Check behind book five.”

So Luz did. She went to the shelf and carefully took out the book only to find another one behind it. It was a worn-out, teal green book with a hand drawn cover. She glanced at Amity for permission to open it, and the girl nodded in encouragement.

Hesitantly, she opened it and was greeted with paragraphs written in ink.

August 08, 20XX

Luz Noceda.

I don’t know who you are. I saw Willow read your letter. I think it was sweet that you decided to use the post office instead of a phone. It’s nice to have some keepsake that can’t be deleted. You don’t know who I am, but I hope to meet you in the future.

Since you just inspired me to write letters too.

I probably won’t give this to you though.

Sincerely,

Amity Blight

Letters.

She turned the page.

January 12, 20XX

Dear Luz,

I met you for the first time today. It was terrible. You just moved in and I almost got you banned from enrolling in Hexside!

I don’t think you’ll remember me. Or maybe you will. You’ll probably have bad memories. I’m sorry in advance.

Yours truly,

Amity Blight.

There were pages that dated back to three and a half years ago. They were all addressed to her. One in particular, caught her eyes. It was the night of Amity’s last game, and the first time Luz spoke to her.

Hi, Luz.

Or well, hi, book.

You spoke to me today. My mind was vacant when you talked to me, and it was embarrassing! I had so many questions for you. I’m not a stalker, I swear. I just saw you in the library a few months ago and saw you writing a letter.

At least, I assumed it was.

But I haven’t seen you since then. Or well, I have, but you weren’t writing anymore.

I hope in the future, when you start writing again- and when we’re friends (I wish), I’ll receive a letter from you too.

Wishing,

Amity Blight

She wrote letters. Neatly handwritten letters. Some short and some long. It made Luz’s heart ache, in the most choked up way. Her chest tightened as she was overwhelmed. She was confused, amazed, happy, surprised-

She raised her head to see Amity. The girl was looking at the floor. Luz’s mouth opened and closed like a fish; her lips quivered as she closed the book.

Nobody ever wrote her a letter. They didn’t reply.

They did, but always verbally.

Luz kind of wished she also had ones to keep to herself.

She took a deep breath. It was hard to concentrate since she wasn’t alone in the room, but she had to think. Of course, Amity might’ve thought that Luz only wrote a letter because of what happened earlier today. Or because of the few weeks that Amity probably had to gather her thoughts.

You would’ve broken my heart.

Amity would’ve felt bad. It would feel as if she had just forced Luz to do something she didn’t want to do.

“Three.”

Amity stiffened. She gazed up at Luz in question. Gently, Luz laid the book on the shelf and walked towards her. Her eyes never left hers as she knelt in front of her and took her hands, lacing their fingers together.

“Since that very first night, I have written three letters to you.”

Not counting the drafts she threw in the trash anyway.

Even before this whole debacle, Luz had written to her. She liked to think that she had stopped writing them since she moved here, but those spontaneous moments she spent with Amity urged her to write to her.

Amity’s eyes glistened with tears. Luz understood that she didn’t have anyone to write to, and the only person she considered was safe enough to not have embarrassed her was the new girl who moved to Bonesborough all those years ago.

Luz couldn’t tell her everything. She built palaces out of paragraphs for Amity; She wrote answers in every line, tearing down her defenses with every sentence. There weren’t enough words in the dictionary to convey what she wanted to show her.

They stayed there for what seemed like hours. Amity told her about how humiliated she felt when she asked that question in the gym. She was about to burst and admit that she had written to Luz. The guilt ate her alive when she found out that Luz didn’t write anymore. Or that she wouldn’t have.

Luz explained why she stopped. It was time to stop letting something in the past eat up her future. Amity listened well, and she threatened to take a plane back to Connecticut just to bash Nevareth’s head. Luz punched her shoulder lightly and said Don’t do that but Amity only scowled.

Somehow Luz felt like she had wasted precious time by chickening out and ignoring Amity until graduation.

“Amity, you do know that if you’d have given this to me back in high school we would’ve been together for like, four years now, right?”

“Three.” Amity corrected.

“...Glad we’re on the same page.”

They burst out in a fit of giggles. Amity threw herself into her arms and made them both fall over. Luz didn’t know she was the clingy type, but there was a lot about Amity she needed to figure out and she had all the time in the world to do that.

They spent the evening just talking. Luz waited for her to bring up the unread letter on the table in front of them. It wasn’t until night had fallen and everyone had gone home when Amity finally spoke up about it.

“I want to read all of them.”

“All three?”

Amity shook her head.

“Luz, I know you wrote more than three. You wrote way too many papers in our class. I’m not dumb enough to believe you don’t have more.”

Welp. She hoped her mom hadn’t taken out the trash yet.

On the other hand, she gave Amity a curious look.

“How many did you write for me?”

Amity smiled. She rested her head against Luz’s shoulder and placed her hand on top of hers. It was funny how Luz’s hand was bigger than her pale one.

“Countless ones, Luz.”

When Luz was in high school, she promised herself that the only time she would write letters- love letters - was when she found someone worth writing for.

In college, not only had she found them, but someone had written to her without her even knowing. Later on, she’d also find out that the persons she did write to had also written one or two back.

People found her worth writing for.

Amity hadn’t read her letter yet; they probably will in a few, together.

For now, it was going to be a message in a bottle.