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Anakin was desperate. Out of his mind, desperate. Which was not something that he really ever was. It was also something that he didn’t know how to be, and that only made him feel more desperate. To make the whole thing worse, he had no idea how to stop the eternal circle of desperation and panic.
Padme, Ahsoka and Obi-Wan all told him that he was being ridiculous. That he was overreacting. Well, they didn’t know what they were talking about because they weren’t in love with their former captain and best friend who seemed completely oblivious to every hint Anakin had tried to give.
He hasn’t been subtle, either. Almost since the moment the war had ended, he laid out every bit of flirtatious technique he knew. He showered Rex with compliments. He bought him gifts. He took him out to places on Coruscant that he knew the other man would love. Yet, all Rex seemed to be every single time was flustered and red. Anakin was actually beginning to worry that he was making him uncomfortable.
When he bemoaned that fact to Obi-Wan, his brother had just laughed at him.
“Anakin, Rex clearly likes you as well. He’s just nervous and unsure. After the war, I can’t blame him. You just need to keep showing him how much you care. You’ll break through his fears eventually.”
He groaned and flopped dramatically onto the other Jedi’s couch. “Obi-Wan, this isn’t a battle of Soresu! This is love ! This is my life! ”
Obi-Wan laughed and peered down at him over the couch’s back. “You’re fairly dramatic, my dear.”
“No! Not dramatic. Totally justified. I am in love, and Rex might hate me and I don’t know what to do with myself.”
His former master sighed as he walked around the couch and gently moved Anakin’s legs in order to sit down beside him. “Anakin, Rex doesn’t hate you. I am near certain that he feels the same way you do. You just have to have patience. The opportunity for the two of you to express your feelings fully will come. I know it.”
Anakin swung himself into a sitting position and met Obi-Wan’s eyes. “You actually think so? That Rex returns my feelings and isn't getting all flustered because he secretly hates me?”
“Of course he doesn’t hate you, Anakin.” Obi-Wan rested his hand on his shoulder. “He very clearly feels deeply for you, and I have it on good authority that those feelings are just as romantic as yours are.”
“Cody’s authority?”
Obi-Wan chuckled and raised a brow. “Perhaps. Though, that isn’t what is important.”
“Which is?”
“That Rex loves you as well, and the opportunity to start a relationship will come when it's supposed to. You just have to be patient and wait for it.”
“Patience isn’t exactly my strong suit.” he mumbled.
Obi-Wan squeezed his shoulder. “You are capable of it. I know you are.”
“What if I just say, ‘hey, Rex, I’m in love with you. Move in with me and have a dozen babies. Yeah?’”
“A dozen, huh?”
He groaned and nudged his laughing former master in the ribs with his elbow. “Shut up! I just said a number!”
“Do you want to move in with Rex and have a dozen babies?”
Anakin flushed and shrugged. “Maybe not a dozen. But, uh, yeah. Yeah I really, really want to have a family with him. I want to have a life with him. Whatever that life entails.”
“Why haven’t you just said that then?”
He sighed and shrugged again. “Worry, I guess. That he really does secretly hate me. That he’ll be disgusted by me loving him. I would lose him then, and I’d rather have him as a friend than not at all.”
“You won’t lose him, Anakin.” Obi-Wan assured him softly. “As I’ve been saying, the moment you have it, seize the opportunity to tell him. You don’t need to make yourself suffer like this. Tell him very bluntly how you feel.”
“Is that what you did with Cody?”
“Well, in a way. Though I didn’t mention a dozen babies right away.”
Anakin groaned and pushed the other man’s shoulder, which just earned a loud laugh. “I’m not gonna say that to him, Obi-Wan, sheesh!”
“I know. All you have to do is just be bluntly honest with him. Okay?”
He sighed. “Okay. Bluntly honest. I can do that.”
“I know you can.” Obi-Wan gave him a supportive smile and once more squeezed his shoulder. “Just don’t push it. You’ll know when the time is right.”
Anakin took his brother’s advice to heart, like he always tried to do. This time though, he kept it like a mantra in his head. The opportunity to tell Rex would come, and he would know when it had.
To both his relief and absolute terror, the perfect moment came much sooner than he had expected it to. There was a food festival happening in one of the mid levels of Coruscant, and he knew that Rex would enjoy it. His former captain always loved trying local foods on every planet they had ended up on. Anakin just knew that Rex would enjoy a whole festival dedicated to exotic and delicious foods.
So, he happily, and nervously, made his way to the apartment complex that the vod’e had been given after the war. Anakin was of the mind that they weren’t near good enough for the soldiers who had kept the galaxy safe, but Rex insisted that they were more than nice enough. Rex just wasn’t used to asking for nice things, yet.
Anakin would make sure he knew to, though. Starting with nice food. Which was why he was knocking on Rex’s door and rocking nervously on the balls of his feet. He was going to ask Rex to go to the festival with him, but he was going to make sure he knew that Anakin was asking him out not as friends, but as something much more than that.
When the door slid open to reveal Rex, dressed in soft pants and a plain bright blue shirt, Anakin’s heart felt like it had stopped beating. There was just, something so, so wonderful about seeing Rex dressed so softly and simply. He looked incredibly young and light and Anakin never wanted to have to see him look like the world was on his shoulders again.
A gentle smile grew on Rex’s face as he took in Anakin standing before him. Something which made him look even younger and lighter.
“Anakin. Hi.”
He flushed and raised his hand. “Hi, Rex. Can I come in?”
“Of course.”
He stepped back and Anakin followed after him into the small, but comfortable apartment. Normally, he’d sit to talk and just hang out with Rex before asking him to go out, or giving him a gift, or any other attempt to get him to realize Anakin’s feelings. This time though, he was here to be direct. He was here to finally lay his feelings bluntly on the line.
Turning to face Rex, though, had all the nerves bubbling up and his entire self control vanishing. He had meant to be eloquent. To complement Rex and be poetic. He absolutely hadn’t meant to just blurt his feelings out without any sort of filter.
Yet, that is exactly what he did. The second his eyes met Rex’s soft honey ones, he was blurting out, “I’m in love with you!”
Rex’s expression became wide, his mouth opening slightly. Before he could say anything though, Anakin was plowing on in a desperate attempt to get back to the romantic confession he had been aiming for.
“I mean, well, of course I am! You’re you . You’re beautiful and brave and hilarious and just my perfect level of chaos. These last three years with you by my side have been worth every little bit of hardship, because you were there. Now that the war is over and I don’t get to see you every day, I just, I hate it. Because I love you so much and every day I don’t get to spend with you feels like my heart is being stabbed.
“Which is why I keep asking you to explore Coruscant with me. I just, I want to spend time with you. I want to give you gifts, and experiences and just, everything you’ve never gotten to have before. I’ve been wanting to tell you for so long, been desperate to tell you, really. I’ve just also been too afraid to because I can’t handle losing you.”
He glanced away from Rex’s wide eyes and said softly, “You don’t have to return the feelings. Or even say anything at all. I just, I wanted to tell you so that you knew when I asked you to go to the food festival with me, you knew I was asking you out. Romantically. So that you could say no if you want me to stop asking you places entirely.”
Rex took a couple steps forward so they were standing right beside each other. In a gentle voice he said, “I would love to go to the food festival with you.”
Anakin’s head jerked up so their eyes met once more. Rex was giving him a tender smile, eyes loving and warm. It was a look he had never seen before, and he couldn’t help but let out a small gasp.
“You do? Romantically?”
Rex’s face flushed and he nodded. “Of course. I, I may have had a very good idea of what your feelings were. I was just, well, I guess you’d say I was scared too. I was scared that I wouldn’t be enough. Or that you would realize you didn’t actually feel that way when we weren’t together all the time. Because I love you too, and I don’t think I could have handled that.”
The gasp he let out this time was loud and alarmed. He reached a hand out to rest his palm against Rex’s cheek. “I would never change my mind. Never, Rex. I love you more than I even know how to say. You’re the most important person in my life and that will never change.”
He sighed softly and leaned into Anakin’s hand. “I believe you.”
“So, you will give us being something a chance?” he asked, some of the desperation he’d been feeling leaking into his voice.
Rex must have noticed immediately as he was nodding and leaning up to press his forehead to Anakin’s. “I would love nothing more.”