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THAT DARNED BLUE MORPHO
“Dad!” The kid excitedly latches onto Minho’s leg, nuzzling his nose against it. He laughs and ruffles his hair. “Hey, kiddo, missed me?” He asks, and the boy nods eagerly. “Dad, can we get ice cream on the way home?” He says excitedly with his adorable puppy eyes Minho couldn’t ever say no to. “Of course, baby, do you want the chocolate flavor?”
“No! Innie says chocolate is bad for your health, I want the vanilla one.” The kid, Felix, adamantly shakes his head. Minho frowns, “Innie? And who might ‘Innie’ be? A new friend?”
Just as he says this, another boy comes running out of the building and into the arms of a man whose outfit and whole aura scream everything but that of a father figure. He waves to Felix with a big smile. “This is Innie, Felix? Your friend?” He turns to the boy still attached to his leg. “Yep! He gave me some of his carrots earlier during snack time.”
Minho raises an eyebrow. “Really? Nice to see your friend has gotten you to eat vegetables for once.”
He tries to pay no attention to the man his son’s friend is currently attached to, nor to the black Nirvana sleeveless top he has on, and most definitely not to the butterfly tattoo on the top of his left arm. He bites back the snicker bubbling up in his throat and lifts Felix up into his arms. “Let’s go, Felix. We should get going. We still have to get your ice cream, don’t we?”
ʚɞ
Chan knows Felix’s father has held some sort of judgement towards him ever since they first saw each other at the kids’ daycare. He also knows it probably has to do with the way he carries himself; he does not dress like other fathers normally would, yes, but what does that have to do with his capability to raise a human being?
The way he was eyeing him up and down that day still annoys him as much as it did then, but he had held himself back from saying anything. It’s not like the man voiced out directly that he didn’t like him, right? And Chan isn’t one to start anything. So he keeps his mouth shut.
Until he can’t.
It takes one more look of disapproval from the other man on their fifth day of seeing each other for Chan to say something. “Excuse me, Felix’s dad right?” He starts carefully, keeping his tone as polite as possible while taking a few steps closer as if he was approaching a temperamental cat. Felix’s dad gives him a suspicious look, but nods nonetheless. “Minho. Lee Minho.”
At least he has the decency to introduce himself.
Chan bows back out of courtesy, promptly introducing himself as well. “Bang Chan. I’ve just been wondering, sir. Do you, perhaps, have any problem with me?” He asks, an eyebrow slightly raised. Minho says nothing for a few seconds, before he shakes his head no and says, “No, what makes you think so?”
Chan has to stop himself from snorting. “Oh? I just thought you did because you’ve been sending me these weird looks all week, I couldn’t help but worry whether I had done something to upset you.” He says, but he only half means it.
Minho looks down with a chuckle. “No, no, you haven’t. Perhaps I was just worried you might be giving other parents the wrong idea.”
Chan, doing his best to not lose his patience, maintains a polite smile. “Wrong idea?”
Minho seems unfazed. “Yeah, you know…” He says, eyeing his left arm the way he had the first time.
Chan opens his mouth to make a retort, but the familiar feeling of arms around his knee catches him off guard completely. “Papa!” A small voice greets him happily. Chan spares the other parent one more glance before smiling back down at his child. “Why, hello there, my sweet, how was your day?” He asks with a wide, fatherly smile. “It was really good! We made snacks, and read books, and played a lot of games!” Jeongin makes grabby hands up at him with a pout, asking to be carried. “Papa, uppie.” Chan swiftly picks him up and kisses his nose. “Yeah? Did you learn a lot, then?”
The boy nods. “I did! I also learned how to count to fifty from Lixie!”
“Fifty?” Chan’s eyes widen in surprise. “Wow, that’s amazing, my love! I’m so proud of you!” He chuckles and gently pinches Jeongin’s nose. Jeongin giggles and shakes his shoulders up. “Papa,” he says with an attempted serious look. Chan thinks it’s adorable. “Felix says he thinks you and his daddy are fighting.” he frowns. “Is that true?”
“What—” Chan chuckles, albeit a little uneasily. “Innie, darling, what are you saying?” He asks, looking at Minho warily. “Mr. Minho and I are not fighting, okay? Tell Felix that his father and I are on…good terms. Alright?”
“Okay, Papa.” Jeongin replies, but still pouts.
“Now, let’s go home, yeah? I bet you’re sleepy.”
ʚɞ
The following days are filled with the same quiet scoffs, the same side-eyes, the same clicks of the tongue, and by the end of the week, Chan figures it pointless to let Minho perceive him this way. He doesn’t change anything about his style of clothing, nor does he make any effort to cover up his tattoo, which, by the way, isn’t even that noticeable so he honestly doesn’t see why Minho seems to be so bothered by it. (If the tattoo really is what makes Minho so put off by him, that is.)
Instead, he does subtle nice things for Minho and Felix. Through Jeongin. He has his son hand his friend and his father an ice cream one day, bottles of cold mango juice the next, and by the time Wednesday rolls around Minho finally comes to the conclusion that it’s actually Chan giving these things to them. What for, he can’t tell. He’s still adamant on disliking the man and plans to keep going.
But when Felix pulls on his sleeve one day and looks at him like he’s a kicked puppy when the boy notices the way he and Chan have been exchanging looks, Minho gives in. But just a little. For Felix.
Even though he’s still slightly irked by the butterfly on Chan’s arm and the way he dresses, he tries to be civil towards him, just to make Felix happy. But he won’t go beyond civility, and he hopes that Felix will accept that much, hopes that his son doesn’t necessarily expect them to become the best of friends like he and Jeongin are.
On the other hand, Chan seems determined to change the way Minho sees him. He’s not exactly sure why, if not for the fact that he sometimes has this incessant need to be liked by everyone. But one reason could be that he wants to prove to Minho none of the stereotypes about people with tattoos are true. That people who dress like “punks” aren’t necessarily bad.
So whenever he sees Minho again, he makes sure to greet the man with a kind beam, and when leaving with Jeongin he waves him goodbye with an even wider smile. Minho is confused at the way he’s acting, confused as to why Chan keeps making these kind gestures when he only ever treats him with mild disdain. But he promised Felix he’d try to be nicer to the other, and he is. He smiles back, although it’s curt, and even gives a small wave to Jeongin as he and his dad leave for the parking lot.
At some point, Chan starts to make small conversation, and Minho replies, but only shortly. Chan doesn’t mind; he’s making progress anyway. And he hopes he’s breaking Minho’s walls at least a little.
As the days pass them by, Minho does let his walls down a little. He finds that his fellow parent is not, in fact, the way he expected him to be at all. But perhaps he should’ve seen that coming, he’s a father to a young child after all. He’s kind, he’s undoubtedly sweet, and maybe a little persistent. When it comes to Minho, at least. With the way the man’s been acting with him, Minho can’t help but wonder whether Chan is actually trying to make Minho like him.
“I’ve never seen you do a whole one-eighty this quick, hyung.” His friend, Hwang Hyunjin, laughs when Minho tells him of his encounters with Bang Chan one day. Felix is off playing with Hyunjin’s son, Jisung, so the two have some time to themselves to talk about adult stuff. Minho rolls his eyes at the remark. “It’s not a one-eighty, it’s…” he pauses, trying to think. “It’s just a ninety.”
“But it’s on its way to being a one-eighty?” Hyunjin wiggles his eyebrows annoyingly, and Minho would shove his head backwards if not for the fact that both their sons are looking at them from the other end of the park. He sighs. “Maybe. I don’t know.”
“Hyung,” Hyunjin gently pats his knee. “You really need to get out of your head about those views you have about tattoos.”
Minho lets out a groan and runs his fingers through his hair that’s already been messed up by the wind in the area. “I know, it’s just… some part of me is still kinda bothered. I thought I knew why, but now I’m starting to re-evaluate that. Chan isn’t… He’s not how I viewed tattooed people to be. It feels like he’s trying to prove me wrong.”
“And you think it’s working?” Hyunjin raises an eyebrow.
“It might be, I’ve no idea.” Minho replies. “Yeah, no, it’s… it’s working.”
ʚɞ
Of course, their relationship ends up moving past civility and onto actual friendship. Chan has easily accepted that, while Minho is… on his way there. He’s getting there. Chan feels like he’s made headway, considering how Minho seems to be responding to him a bit more positively. He even cracks a few jokes sometimes, but he still keeps his distance. Chan thinks he’s seeing something new to him: where Minho used to regard him with distasteful glances and passive aggressive comments, he greets him with smiles, no matter how small, and makes a lot of remarks Chan knows he only means sarcastically. He’s gotten used to it by now.
So when he asks Minho if he would accompany him to the school’s family day, the reaction he gets doesn’t surprise him in the slightest.
“What?” Minho scoffs, “No, I will not go with you. What if you’re some type of gang member that does dangerous stuff your son doesn’t know about?” He asks, half as a joke, half seriously.
“Gang member?” Chan laughs. “Minho-ssi, we’re working parents in our mid-thirties, not reckless high school students. Do you think you can’t trust me while we’re not in proximity of the school?”
Minho only shrugs. “Who knows? You could be hiding something dark behind all those sunny smiles of yours.” And he realizes almost immediately that he’s just called the older man’s smile ‘sunny’, but he decides to gloss over that fact for now. Chan, unfortunately, chooses the opposite. When his lips are upturned in a teasing smile, Minho knows he’s said too much. “You think my smile is sunny, huh?”
The younger sighs in exasperation, but he says nothing to defend himself.
“Fine,” he says instead. “I’ll go with you.”
Chan smiles like a golden retriever. “Thank you! How very kind of you, Minho-ssi.”
Neither of their children are able to hide their excitement and surprise when they see the two walking together towards the area their section is in on the day of the event. At first, they exchange a look, and then they’re up and running towards their fathers. “Papa!” Jeongin calls out to his dad excitedly, arms already stretched up asking to be carried. Felix greets Minho with equal, if not more, enthusiasm. “Dada!” He exclaims, again clinging on to the man’s leg like he always does. “Are you friends with Mr. Channie now?” He asks. Minho smiles at his son. The real answer would be a bit beyond little Felix’s understanding, so he says instead, “Yes, baby. We’re friends just like you and Jeongin!”
ʚɞ
Minho, now less bothered by what he used to think was somewhat juvenile, finds himself gravitating towards the other man. They’ve even begun meeting up outside of fetching their children from school, going out to eat or have a quick coffee. He already knows that Chan is a nice person; he’s not at all how he dresses. In fact, Minho thinks he might even be the complete opposite. It’s easy to talk to him, Minho finds out, it’s easy to tell him things — things like struggles as a single parent and the ridicule he sometimes receives because “his child lacks a maternal presence in his life” — because he knows Chan will understand him. He knows that it must be even harder for him because other people may perceive him the way Minho did at first.
“It was hard for Felix when his other dad left; I couldn’t bring myself to tell him what he did because he was so devastated by his leaving. But, perhaps when he’s older, I’ll tell him. I’ll tell him when he can understand.” He tells Chan on one of their now-usual coffee meetups. Minho feels strange that he’s opening up so easily to someone he hasn’t known for very long, but at the same time he’s come to terms with it. He feels safe with him. It’s easy to be around him.
Chan says nothing in response to his little explanation, instead offering him a nod in understanding. “Our situation was like that, too.” he confesses a moment later. “Except that Jeongin found out about what happened with his other dad by accident. Because he told me he heard us fighting. He resents him now, doesn’t even regard him as a father anymore.”
Minho looks down. Perhaps he should’ve considered that Chan had similar experiences before judging him so quickly. “I can hear you thinking, Min.” Chan says, and the younger of the two, as he’s learned he is, pointedly pays no attention to the new nickname. “It’s okay. No one would be able to tell from how I am on the outside. And besides, we’re both over it. Don’t worry about it.”
“Still…” Minho mumbles, mostly to himself.
“I’m more worried about you, Minho. I want to know how you’re feeling.”
Minho frowns. “I mean, for the most part I’m definitely sure I’ve moved on from everything. I guess it’s just weighing me down a little because I haven’t told Felix yet. I know I need to tell him the truth, but I’m just afraid of how he’ll react. He really loved him, you know? It’ll crush him to know that his other dad – no longer his dad – turned out to be an asshole.”
Chan grabs his hand and rubs the inside of his wrist to comfort him. Minho thanks him silently.
ʚɞ
Without meaning to, Minho finds himself falling for the other parent. And he’s falling fast. But it’s hard not to. He’s sweet, he’s caring, he always makes these little gestures towards him that never cease to give him butterflies. Ironic, Minho scoffs to himself, ironic how he gives me butterflies when just a few months ago I was being unreasonably rude to him because of that butterfly tattoo on his arm. It doesn’t bother him now, though. The tattoo, that is. In fact, he’s even come to like that tattoo more than he should. More than he wants to. He likes Chan more than he wants to.
But he’s not the only one.
Chan is falling, too. Chan is falling just as hard as Minho is.
ʚɞ
And it all happens quickly. Much too quickly. Both Minho’s and Chan’s sons are at school for the whole day and will only be picked up at two in the afternoon, so they have decided to spend the day on a friendly date. When they wind up at a quiet cafe with almost no one around, it spills over. It spills over when Minho lets out his twentieth sigh of the day. “Min,” Chan chuckles. “What is it? You keep sighing and sighing, what’s wrong?”
“Hyung,” Minho huffs, on the brink of pouting. He’s gotten comfortable doing that around the older, even when he doesn’t normally sulk in front of other people. “Are we going to keep pretending there’s nothing between us? I know you see it.”
Chan smiles fondly the way he would when he’s looking at Jeongin. “I’d rather not pretend. Why?” He asks, a smile in his tone. Minho looks down to avoid his gaze, electing to focus on the way his nail is currently picking at the chipping wood on the table. But he feels a gentle finger lift his chin up, coaxing him to look at the other. “Talk to me, Min. What do you want?”
“You.” Minho mutters, his pout perfectly intact. Chan laughs and leans in to press a quick peck to it. “Sometimes I wonder whether you’re really a parent or Felix’s little brother.” He says, thumb gently caressing Minho’s jaw.
Minho shudders at the touch; he hasn’t felt that way in years. “I could be yours.” He tilts his head, smiling teasingly. Chan nods in agreement. “I think I’d like that.”
Chan later takes his jacket off as they’re making their way to the school, as per Minho’s request. The latter spends time taking a good look at the butterfly, and in retrospect, Minho thinks it’s kinda stupid he let himself be bothered by something so… small. And whoever the artist was definitely did a good job on this one.
“You ogling my arm or is it the tattoo again?” Chan teases once they arrive at the school’s parking lot with Chan’s car. Minho’s broken out of his trance and he looks up to give Chan the stink eye. “I wasn’t ogling , I was looking.”
“Sure, Min. Sure.” Chan winks. Minho only rolls his eyes and turns his attention to the gate where Felix and Jeongin are supposed to come out. While waiting, he sneaks a few more glances at Chan’s tattoo, thinking deeply about something.
But then a whole ocean of children comes running out of said gate, and both Minho and Chan think it’s safe to say that their children are more than surprised when they see them standing next to each other, arms linked. Jeongin and Felix turn to each other and loudly whisper something along the lines of ‘I think our dads are getting married’. Minho chuckles, and to evoke a reaction even further, he quickly leans down to kiss the butterfly tattoo with a shit-eating smile, much to the boys’ and Chan’s surprise.
Minho looks down at what he just pressed his lips to and smiles to himself. That darned blue morpho, he chuckles internally. Perhaps he’d like to get a matching one someday.