Archive of Our Own ^beta

Chapter Text

Technoblade grimaced at the unconscious body in front of him. Tommy lay on his front, left cheek smushed in the snow, but there was a definite rise and fall to his chest that Techno would have mistaken for sleep if he hadn't known Tommy's snores from Pogtopia.

No matter, Techno probably shouldn't be leaving his unconscious brother in the snow in just a T-shirt and khakis, even if it would be really funny. The voices seemed to agree, split between laughing and telling Techno to help Tommy.

So Techno carefully scooped the boy up, frowning minutely at how light he was, and continued carefully to his house. Prime, Tommy was lucky that Techno had just been returning from his own execution when he'd noticed a flash of red collapse on his property and went to check what was going on.

Making his way inside, he set Tommy on the floor, and checked he was breathing again. Everything was fine on that front, but as for the rest of Tommy...

Techno pulled a face as he eyed the array of yellowing bandages poking out of Tommy's clothes, which in themselves probably shouldn't have been as torn up as they were. And, because Technoblade was such a kind and caring brother, he took it upon himself to replace the bandages with clean ones before Tommy woke up and became too stubborn to accept the help.

Now, Techno liked to think he didn't feel too many annoying emotions after hundreds of years roaming servers, but even he had to admit that his stomach rolled when he peeled Tommy's shirt up to check if there were any wounds on his torso and was met with a large, still blistering partial thickness burn that only a multitude of explosions could create that were joined by similar ones running down his arms and hands. The snow had probably only aggravated it more, Techno groaned in his head, grabbing a Regeneration Potion and soaking a cloth in it before wiping the burn down. 

Continuing the bandage unravelling ("Woah, my first unboxing stream!" One voice chirped, a welcome distraction to the rest of the chat feverish about why Tommy hadn't healed yet. Weird, because Regen didn't work like Healing did. That was common knowledge), Techno sighed as more new burns littered Tommy's bare skin, but only his left shin had a bandage, thankfully. All the other bandaged wounds had been gashes which had already had some sort of potions hastily splashed on them, meaning they were healed, although obviously haphazardly.

So Techno had no problem peeling off the last bandage. Like the others, it had had a shitty potion thrown on it at some point that closed it up, and Techno was just on finishing with the Regen when he noticed something else.

Tommy's right shoe was missing.

His barefoot - seriously, how hadn't Techno noticed it before - was about as torn and bloody as Tommy's clothes were, which wasn't something Techno wanted to think about at the moment.

Tommy's foot, unlike the other wounds, hadn't been closed by potions and had quite obviously come to such a state from his trek to the Tundra. Techno's pretty sure if he looked hard enough he could see the bone, and the first signs of some pretty bad frostbite. Fuck, why had Tommy come all this way with nothing to prepare him? How was he even able to walk?

On closer inspection though - some voices shrieked, although most laughed emphatically as Techno got closer to the gash - Tommy had wrapped a tourniquet just under his knee, and had probably lost feeling in his leg. Great, that meant he needed an amputation, and Techno couldn't exactly call someone to the Tundra right now. 

Why Phil had taught Techno how to do an amputation had been lost in the years since he'd first had to perform one, but Techno was pretty sure he still had it down as he checked Tommy's breathing one last time before getting to work.

Tommy awoke in the void. He rolled his eyes, sighing as he felt around for the regeneration button while listening for anything happening around his body. He could hear the crackling of a fire and nothing else, so supposed it was safe to revive himself.

Finding the button, he mused to himself how lucky it was that he'd made it to Techno's before he died. He barely remembered hauling himself inside, but he was exhausted and suffering from severe blood loss, so it wasn't surprising he didn't remember the last leg of the journey. Tommy didn't remember running into Techno either, meaning his secret was safe, double luck. Maybe the universe was starting to be kind to him. 

Blinking open his eyes, he took in the worn out old couch he had draped himself across, facing a lit fireplace. Unfamiliar, sure, but now Tommy was healing up he could sneak into Techno's basement before he could realise Tommy was even there.

He slowly sat up, groaning to himself as the aches in his body continued to fix themselves. Techno probably had some potions he could steal to help with that.

Stretching, he swung his legs off the couch and went to stand up... and immediately overbalanced and let his face become acquainted with Techno's lovely cold stone floor.

Cursing his low iron levels, Tommy pushed himself into a sitting position again, moving to stand. Only...

"What the fuck?!"

There was a clattering from upstairs, and Tommy instantly panicked, knowing Dream was probably going to yell at him for being too loud again. For a moment, he was back on the beach.

It made sense actually. Dream had caught Tommy trying to run away, and he didn't have any pets to kill this time, so he'd resorted to another, more extreme method. It would be a bitch to explain how he was still alive though.

But it wasn't Dream who stepped into Tommy's view, it was Techno .

"Tommy? When'd you wake up?"

"Where the fuck is my leg, bitch?!" Tommy jabbed at his thigh, the only remaining part of his leg there, then paled, "Why can't I feel my leg?!"

Techno crouched down so that he was in eyeline with Tommy, who was still sitting on the floor. Backlit by the fire, his bulky form looked even more threatening than usual with no light on his face. Tommy curled the leg he could feel into his chest, making himself as small as possible.

Techno noticed his discomfort immediately, raising his hands in a placating manner, "I put some numbing agent on your leg, but I didn't expect you to be awake so quick."

Well that explained why Tommy couldn't feel his leg, but, "Where's the rest of my leg though, prick?"

There was a silence for a moment where Tommy could see Techno's mouth moving uselessly in his silhouette.

"Tommy, you put a fucking tourniquet around your leg."

"And what, bitch?"

"You fucking- Tommy do you know what a tourniquet does?"

"Stops bleeding."

"By keeping all the blood above the compressed area! And all its toxins too! You would have died if I'd just taken it off!"

Tommy snapped his mouth shut, otherwise "I died anyway!" would have slipped out, and that would have Techno asking questions . Questions never ended well. But it also meant Techno didn't know that he'd just died.

"If it makes it any better, the hounds were fed well." Techno said when Tommy stayed quiet.

"What the fuck, man."

"Did you want to keep your slowly decomposing human leg? Bruhhh," Techno asked sarcastically, turning to sit beside Tommy, patting him on the shoulder awkwardly, "I'm, uh, sorry for your loss. But I patched you up the best I could," He gestured to the bandaged thigh, "And you can have some potions to speed up the healing."

"Oh," Tommy nodded, staring at the fire, "Yeah, thanks."

"And I'll commission a cool prosthetic leg for you. Free of charge... well, maybe not free --"

"Wait, for real? You'll get me a new leg?" Tommy perked up.

"Well, I can't get it immediately, but yeah, sure. Think you've already suffered a bit much."

Tommy beamed, "Oh, Techno, this makes up for you cutting it off in the first place! You've just made yourself an ally!" His smile faded a little, "As long as I can hide here from Dream."

"I don't think you can run anywhere else at the moment," Techno huffed, which Tommy understood as a 'yeah, I'm too worried to let you leave'.

He paused, looking down at his thigh, looking for a different subject.

"Can my leg have missile blasters in it?"

Techno hummed, as if he was considering it, "Not sure that's possible."

" Anything's possible if you try hard enough, big man."

Tommy ended up with a blue leg, similar to the colour of Friend's wool, after Ghostbur dropped by and suggested it. Tommy didn't have the heart to turn him down.

The foot was gold, on Techno's insistence, but it was fully operational. It took a few days to get used to, but the knee and ankle bent like a normal leg would and Tommy found himself comfortable with it in no time.

After a few weeks kept inside (which was way too long in Tommy's opinion), Techno finally let him go out to hunt and collect resources, with copious amounts of Invis, obviously.

And then they were told about the Green Festival. Techno had been causing chaos in L'Manberg while Tommy kept healing (which was actually bullshit. A death healed everything and Tommy had been dying to go out on missions since he'd got his leg), and finally announced Tommy could join him to spy on the festival.

Admiring the new builds as they went, Tommy skipped along eagerly, chatting Techno's ear off about anything and everything, from the warm day to his excitement at seeing Tubbo again. 

"Isn't it Tubbo's fault you were exiled in the first place?" Techno questioned at one point.

"Well, yeah, but he didn't really have a choice. I hate that he did it, but he's still, like, my best friend," Tommy reasoned, reasonably . He was getting good at that.

"Personally, Phil has never exiled me."

"Well, has Phil ever been President of a country?"

Techno didn't answer, which Tommy took as answer enough.

They downed their first Invisibility Potions as they drew up on the country, which was looking... spectacularly empty for the place of a supposed festival. Just as Tommy was going to ask Techno about where everyone was, Jack came stumbling through the street, running desperately towards the Community House.

Without waiting for instruction, Tommy followed. He could hear soft footfalls behind him, so he knew Techno had had the same idea.

He couldn't have expected what he saw.

The Community House, blown to bits. Everyone surrounding it with shock written all over their faces. And Tubbo and Dream in the centre of the debris.

In hindsight, maybe trying to scale a wall with no experience scaling walls with a prosthetic leg was not a good idea. In Tommy's defence, he'd been good at it before.

Instead he managed to make it up to the top of the 20 foot wall left standing before his prosthetic foot slipped on the loose debris and Tommy was sent straight onto his face with a loud crack .

Then he woke up in the void. Fuck!

Tubbo didn't think that debris usually made such a sickening, human sound when it fell. Or that it made a noise that sounded suspiciously like Technoblade yelling "NO!" either.

Everyone's attention was on the sounds in seconds, including his and Dream's.

"Techno?" Dream called, "Is that you?"

"Errr... No?" A voice that was definitely Technoblade said from where the rubble had just fallen. Multiple people pulled out their swords - which, Prime's sake, the festival was supposed to be a no weapons or armour zone! Why was everyone ready to be docked out already?

"Does anyone have any milk?" Tubbo beckoned the crowd, "Techno, could you show yourself?"

There was a huff as Techno stayed invisible, "Bruh, I'm tryna check if someone is alive right now, can you give me a minute?"

Tubbo blinked, looking around the Community House. Everyone was definitely still there and alive.

"Who?"

There was another silence that stretched on for much too long before Techno said, "Lazarbeam."

"Lazar... doesn't live in L'Manberg, big man."

It sounded like Techno was about to respond again when a body began to become visible as their Invis ran out. Tubbo immediately assumed it was Techno, lying on the floor in an an odd way to evade capture, but he quickly realised the person on the floor was much too small to be a piglin. Was that...

"Tommy..?" He breathed out, moving over to his best friend before he could stop himself.

Tubbo had assumed Tommy had ran away when he finally visited Logstedshire only to find a cobblestone tower in the ruins. The crushing realisation that he hadn't even left a message for Tubbo, or returned to their bunker, left Tubbo returning to L'Manberg with a heavy heart and news of Tommy's 'suicide'.

But here he was, slowly becoming opaque again. Out of everyone he could have run to, Tommy chose Techno ?

He looked like shit too, excluding the fact he'd just fallen off a wall and was waiting to revive himself. Tommy had always had baby fat that clung stubbornly to his bones, no matter how much he trained, but now his cheekbones protruded through his skin and his hands had no meat to them.

He was wearing a jumper and trousers that had obviously been altered to fit a sixteen year old human rather than a 8-foot piglin, and maybe that created the illusion that Tommy was smaller than he was, but Tubbo liked to think his friend wasn't that thin.

"What happened to him?" He asked Techno, who was now fading into view as well.

"He fell off that wall." Techno pointed up like it was the most obvious thing in the world.

Tubbo shook his head, crouching down beside Tommy, who definitely wasn't breathing, "I mean, why does he look like this? He didn't go into exile like this."

Techno snorted, "It's almost like not seeing someone for ages changes them."

"Wha- Not this much!" Tubbo sputtered, glancing down Tommy's body for anything he had to be careful of when he moved Tommy's body for his revival, "Why does Tommy have two different shoes on..?"

Techno's eyes flicked to Tommy's feet too, then shrugged, "One of them's fake."

Which didn't mean anything to Tubbo. Shaking his head, he rolled Tommy over, shielding his body from the crowd, and went about picking the boy up carefully.

"Tubbo," Techno's voice dropped to a mutter, "He's not breathing. That was his last life."

Bowing his head, Tubbo stood slowly, ignoring Techno as he addressed the crowd, "I'm going to take him to be healed. He's still alive."

"Tubbo, did you not hear me--"

"Surely I should do that?" Dream's voice cut over Techno's from where he was still stood in the centre of the rubble, "After all, he is still exiled from L'Manberg--"

"Well then I revoke his exile," Tubbo spat, holding Tommy closer to his chest. He shouldn't have been so easy to lift, "You seem to have proven how well you can look after him."

He turned on his heel before anything else could be said, striding out of the ruins of the Community House and towards their bunker. The crowd parted like water as he went, stone faced and clinging onto a corpse.

The crack of Tommy's skull mending itself was never a sound Tubbo liked to say he had got used to, even if he had a long time ago. As he trudged through a field half a mile from the L'Manberg border, he gave Tommy the go ahead after making sure nobody was following them, and not a moment later were the bones realigning themselves.

Tubbo kept his eyes glued ahead as Tommy took his first gasping breath and began moving again, groaning as he continued to heal.

"Sorry about that one, Tubso," He laughed, although it was scratchy as his throat removed shards of spine from itself.

Tubbo said nothing, just kept walking.

After another minute or so, Tommy wriggled out of Tubbo's arms. Tubbo gladly let him go, checking he wouldn't fall before continuing on without a word. Tommy stumbled to keep up.

"Did I do something wrong?" He scratched at his eyebrow before wiping some blood from his forehead away, "I mean, I know I shouldn't have tried climbing up an unstable wall, but I did make it all the way up before I fell! And you told the crowd I wasn't dead, so it's not that big a deal."

Tubbo turned his gaze to Tommy, brow pinched and lips downturned in a way he'd learnt to show his unhappiness in a Presidential way. Although he tried to muster words, they all failed him, so he just turned back to facing forwards.

Tommy seemed to understand just fine though, much to Tubbo's annoyance, "Were you worried about me, big man?"

Tubbo grit his teeth before letting out a small, "Still am."

Tommy threw his arms around Tubbo's shoulders, giving him a grin they both knew was real, "I'm okay, man. I had a shitty time in exile, but Techno actually, like, cared about me, so I've been good!"

"Why'd you go to Techno?" Tubbo asked quietly, "You could have just come to the bunker."

Tommy frowned, looking away, "I wasn't ready to face you yet, and honestly, ending up at Techno's was a complete mistake. I just started walking and recognised his build, and then he like, amputated my leg, and I've just been chilling with him since."

Tubbo stopped short, eye twitching as he processed Tommy's words. Said boy kept walking, not noticing Tubbo's pause.

"He what? "

Tommy faltered, glancing at Tubbo then down at his legs, lifting the one with the golden shoe on up.

"Oh, I thought- I thought you'd worked it out already..." He said lamely, rolling up his trouser leg to reveal a blue prosthetic, "I thought that was why you were so worried?"

"No, you idiot!" Tubbo rushed the other boy, punching his arm, "I was worried about how light you were! Although I guess having a missing leg contributes to that too."

"I'm okay, I swear!" Tommy rubbed his arm awkwardly, "It's my fault for walking through the Tundra without a shoe on."

Tubbo ran a hand over his face and muttered, "I swear to Prime."

"But I died right after Techno amputated the leg, so it healed nice and quick," Tommy smoothly ignored Tubbo, "And I think it's cool. Like how you've got your scar, I've got a missing leg."

"Our immortality is so sick," Tubbo said sardonically, but a small smile slipped onto his face.

Tommy laughed, "We make the best with what we've got, innit?"

Tubbo smiled wider, "Yeah, big man, that's all we can do." 

"Tubbo."

"We just wanted to live in peace, Techno! Why did you do this?"

"Tubbo--"

"You know what, let's fight, right now. L'Manberg's up in flames, and for what?!"

"Tubbo, I did this to avenge Tommy! How is he standing right next to you right now?!"

Tubbo and Tommy glanced at each other before they both shrugged in sync.

"I got better!"

" What? "

"Do you want to 2v1 or not?"

Chapter Text

The first time Tommy remembers his parents arguing was when he was seven. And with his mother being a God, he couldn't just pretend it wasn't happening.

Arguments didn't happen often, really. Trixten was in The End a lot, doing her Goddess things like granting wishes or aiding battles across the Overworld. Tommy didn't really understand what she did a lot, because he was seven and didn't have a concept of "work" and "jobs", and only really knew about The End because that's where Wilbur told him that Trixten was whenever Tommy asked. But whenever she visited the house, she was there with a smile and a warm hug, and sometimes she even brought gifts of things called 'chorus fruit' that made Tommy feel funny after eating, or 'elytra' that only Phil knew how to wear.

Phil, on the other hand, dropped by the house every few months to check he and Wil were still surviving securely, and left money with them which Wilbur sometimes let Tommy buy new clothes or toys with. He rarely brought back gifts, but he'd always bring Techno along, who Tommy adored and insisted teach him how to fight.

All in all, neither of his parents were around a lot for Tommy to see them have arguments. He just lived out his days with Wilbur, and Tubbo, who they'd found in a box a few years ago and was Tommy's best friend. Whenever Tommy wandered into Wilbur's room after midday to find him still curled up under the covers, he would go and play with Tubbo instead.

The day Tommy heard his parents arguing for the first time, he'd done just that. Tommy went to go and check on Wilbur after Tubbo and he had made themselves lunch, and, after seeing the familiar lump under the comforter in Wilbur's room, facing away from the door and unmoving, Tommy left a plate on his brother's bedside table and convinced Tubbo to go and play in the woods.

A normal - not everyday, but normal - routine, all in all. The woods were a mile from the house and Tommy would have confidently told you that he and Tubbo knew it like the back of their hands, before the day of the argument.

Neither of the boys had any problem stepping off the beaten path, exploring further into the woods. Tubbo climbed up the old oak tree that Wilbur liked to sit in and play the guitar in, and Tommy hopped over the nettle bushes Phil always stung himself on.

The shrubbery got thicker, the further they travelled, but it wasn't like Tubbo or Tommy had never made it this deep into the woods before. Take a left at the poison berry bushes, straight on past the birch saplings, and then they reached...

That fountain hadn't always been there, had it?

Tommy thought he would remember a fountain like this, for though it was surrounded by thick woodland, the trees seemed to swerve away from it, their branches not touching the edge, and although leaves fluttered to the ground all around him, not a single leaf lay in the fountain's water. The fountain itself was beautiful, the clean white marble carved intricately in a language Tommy couldn't understand, but had pretty pictures too, of babies with angel wings and butterflies. In the centre there was a full bodied statue of a pretty man with silly goggles over his eyes, and a steady flow of water flowing from his head.

Tommy took a step towards the feature, Tubbo right beside him, just as intrigued. Tubbo jumped up onto the side of the fountain first, staring as his reflection on the surface of the water.

It was Tommy that pushed him in.

Both boys knew they were proficient swimmers for an eight and seven year old, respectively. Next to their house was a lake that Phil had taught Wilbur how to swim in, and then Wilbur had taught the two of them. And both had picked up the techniques quickly. So there was no harm in pushing Tubbo into the fountain.

There should have been no harm pushing Tubbo into the fountain.

And at first, there was none. Tubbo resurfaced quickly, pouting at Tommy while the boy giggled to himself, holding a hand out to pull his friend back out. He began paddling his way towards the edge of the fountain again - and wasn't that weird, that Tubbo had to swim though the fountain? Why wasn't it shallow enough for him to stand? - but just before his hand could grasp Tommy's, he shrieked and was jerked back from the edge and pulled under.

Tommy didn't think before jumping after Tubbo immediately.

The place where Tubbo had just gone under, Tommy dove. Through the blur of the water was the unmissable sea green of Tubbo's jumper, already meters below, thrashing about as he tried to break free of whatever what pulling him down.

Tommy couldn't see anything below Tubbo, but that didn't matter because his best friend had just been pulled under the water and couldn't get back up again.

Tubbo kept being pulled down, quicker than Tommy could catch up, but he kept pushing, kept pulling himself through. A few stray air bubbles flew into Tommy's face, disorientating him for a second, but he kept his eyes locked on Tubbo's form.

Why was this fountain so deep? All the fountains Tommy had seen before were super shallow, with pennies at the bottom and dead bugs floating on top.

Despite there being trees blocking the sun overhead, under the water was as bright as anything. Tommy's eyes were burning. The pressure hurt his ears. His lungs were starting to ache.

Tubbo had stopped moving, presumably at the bottom of the fountain. He wasn't thrashing about anymore.

Pulling himself down the last few feet, Tommy grasped Tubbo's collar and planted his feet on the floor, readying himself to push back up to the surface. Prime, he needed to breathe.

More importantly, he needed to make sure Tubbo could breathe. He hadn't moved in Tommy's grip.

Just as Tommy was about to jump to the surface, he felt a hand grab his ankles, forcing his legs together. Startled, he tried to kick it off, but it wouldn't move. If he'd had any breath left in his lungs, he would have cried out.

Tommy clutched Tubbo closer to him and looked down at his feet. He couldn't see anything. But something that definitely felt like a hand kept him at the bottom of the fountain.

In vain, Tommy tried to kick his way to the surface, but he stayed resolutely pinned to the bottom. His movements began to slow as his muscles began to feel the burn of their depleted oxygen.

Tommy realised he was going to die.

And wasn't that a mature thought for a seven year old? Wilbur would have been proud of him. Maybe Phil would have been too. Tommy hopes Techno would have been proud. And Tubbo...

Tubbo would have punched his arm and told him to lighten up. Or laughed, and said something about going down together.

Tommy held Tubbo's limp form closer to himself as he closed his eyes. The marble was too bright anyway.

Something might have happened next, but Tommy didn't like to remember it. He's not sure if he could tell you even if you asked. Afterall, this was the day he liked to remember as the first time his parents had an argument, not the first time he and Tubbo died.

When he opened his eyes again, it was like he was looking into the void. Just pure black sky, not a star or cloud in sight. He was sprawled out on an odd surface, that felt like stone, but softer. Nothing like anything from the server he lived in.

... Was this meant to be heaven?

Snapping up, Tommy checked for Tubbo, letting out a huge sigh of relief at seeing him a few feet away, looking just as confused as Tommy felt.

Staggering to his feet, Tommy noted how light he felt as he stumbled his way towards Tubbo before collapsing on top of him with a hug. He felt Tubbo cough at the impact, but encircle his arms around Tommy's frame and hold on just as tight as they processed what had happened to them.

"Is that- did we..?" Tubbo sniffed into Tommy's shoulder. Tubbo had never been much of a crier but Tommy was willing to let him off this once because of how close he was to tears as well.

"Yeah, Tubs... Yeah."

"Where are we?" Tubbo pulled away, scrubbing at his eyes and glancing around.

Tommy shrugged, looking around as well. The floor was a sand colour, strange purple trees sprouted all around them, not as thick as the forest's trees. Tommy was pretty sure if he punched one it would splinter into a million different pieces.

The branches were even more spindly, but off them hung a oddly familiar purple fruit...

"Is that a chorus fruit?" He asked, lumbering to his feet again and taking one, bringing it back to Tubbo. It sure looked and felt like one, and though Tommy didn't take a bite, it smelt like one too.

"I thought they only existed in The End." Tubbo muttered, turning the fruit over in his hand like a ball.

A screech interrupted their scrutinising of the suspected chorus fruit, and Tommy whipped around to fight whoever had come to take Tubbo away from him again. Before he could even see who it was though, a hand was slapped over his eyes and he was drawn closer to Tubbo.

"That's an enderman, stupid," Tubbo hissed into his ear, likely also covering his eyes, "They attack when looked at. Techno told me."

Tommy could feel the enderman's presence in front of them for a few more seconds, before it spoke in some raspy language Tommy couldn't decode, so stayed stock still. Then a whoosh of air blasted his face and Tubbo's hand dropped, and then they were alone again.

"Freaky."

"No kidding," Tubbo hummed, attention back on the chorus fruit, "I have no idea what's going on."

"I'm just as lost as you are, man. Nothing makes sense!"

"Is it meant to?" Tubbo looked around, at the trees and the endless void and the yellow floor that went on forever.

"Well, if I'm being stuck here for the rest of eternity, I'm making sense of it, and you're coming too, Tubs. We're gonna work out where we are and why this floor is all weird, looking like sandstone but not."

Tubbo giggled, nodding his head vehemently, "Sounds good!"

"Of course it does," Tommy scoffed, "All my plans are always good. Nothing bad ever happens when I'm around. Nothing."

The words twisted in his chest and ended up sounding more like a plea. Tubbo, however, pat his arm in understanding, and if Tommy was older than seven, he might have understood it was forgiveness shining back at him from Tubbo's eyes.

But he didn't, and instead threw himself in Tubbo's arms again, breaking down. His sobs had nothing to bounce off, but felt unusually loud in Tommy's ears as he apologised over and over again as Tubbo pat him on the back.

Tommy didn't like to remember how long he spent crying. He knew it didn't make him weak, Tubbo and Trixten and Phil - to some extent - had assured him of that long ago, especially since he'd just gone through a life altering experience, and he was a child that shouldn't have had to process such emotions, but it wasn't his time to be sad. He didn't deserve to feel bad for himself, after everything.

He would have cried for a lot longer if it wasn't for another whoosh of air, further way than the enderman had been, and a frantic voice calling, "Tubbo? Tommy? Are you here?"

A voice Tommy heard maybe once a year, if he was lucky.

His head whipped up, searching for his mother. She was easy to spot, a few hundred feet away in the chorus trees, back turned to the two as she stomped around.

"Trixten!" Tubbo called, finding his voice first. Her head turned so fast Tommy would have been worried she got whiplash if he hadn't been more worried about how her eyes focused on them like a hawk.

Within a second, she was in front of them, much taller than she usually was when she visited their server. She looked furious. If Tommy was a smaller man, he would have been hiding behind Tubbo.

Noticing their fear, Trixten tutted to herself and shrank down, smoothing out her facial expression and holding out her arms. Tommy felt like he was stuck in molasses until Tubbo moved to accept the hug, bringing Tommy with him.

Trixten was as warm as she was whenever she visited, and Tommy allowed himself to cling onto the familiarness and pretend he wasn't still crying even as his mother dried his tears.

"What happened?" She asked quietly as Tommy's sobs ebbed away.

"There... There was a fountain in the woods we hadn't seen before," Tubbo answered, "I fell in and got dragged down. Tommy jumped in afterwards."

"I tried to save him, I really did!" Tommy rushed to explain, "But it was like, a hundred metres deep and something grabbed me once I got Tubbo again."

"A fountain? What did it look like?"

"It was marble?" Tubbo frowned, "Had fancy carvings on it."

"An some weirdo statue in the centre of some guy," Tommy added.

Trixten's face darkened as they spoke, a stormy air sweeping over her before it disappeared again, a mask fit in place.

"And where was your dad when this happened?"

Tubbo's face scrunched up the same way Tommy's did as they tried to remember where Phil actually was.

"I think he's on 2b2t at the moment?" Tommy shrugged, "That's the last place Techno's letters came from."

"He's not home with you?"

"He rarely is," Tubbo nodded, "And Wilbur does his best, but sometimes he feels a bit under the weather, so we look after ourselves."

Trixten didn't look satisfied with the answer, so Tommy rushed to continue.

"Don't blame Wilbur though! It's my fault for convincing Tubbo to come to the woods in the first place, and I'm the one who pushed--"

"I'm so sorry," Trixten only whispered, pressing a soft kiss to both boys foreheads, effectively shutting Tommy up, "Neither of you are meant to be here. Not yet."

"Where are we?" Tommy looked around, but nothing had changed from when he'd first woken up.

"We're in The End, my dears," Trixten smiled proudly, gazing at the plain around her, "This is where you and Phil and Wilbur and Techno come when your time is up."

Tubbo tilted his head, watching Trixten, "But you just said we're not meant to be here."

"No," Trixten agreed, "It was another God that killed you. We're not allowed to do that to each other."

"No, it was a fountain that killed us."

"A magic fountain. One that belongs to HD, God of Beauty." Trixten sighed, "I can't directly reverse what he did, but I'm going to bring you back to your server."

"Really?"

"Yes," It sounded like a promise, "Come on, let's go find Phil."

The void seemed to grow and consume them as soon of she finished talking, but before Tommy could even blink, all three of them were outside their home.

"You two go inside," Trixten smiled softly, "Don't disturb Wilbur, I'll be back in a moment."

Despite her direct orders, the moment Tommy got inside, he raced towards Wilbur's room. Tubbo cried out, but made no move to stop him as Tommy went to knock on the door.

And his fist fell straight through the oak wood.

Startled, Tommy squawked and tried again, only for the same thing to happen. He screamed at his hand, rearing back and bowling back to Tubbo, frantically demonstrating how his hand fazed through the door, and any other objects. It was as if he'd become a ghost. 

Tubbo attempted to pick up the flower vase from the kitchen table, but his hand slipped through as well. With a sinking feeling, they realised they were ghosts.

A moment later, just as Trixten had promised, the front door was thrown open, Techno strolling in first, walking straight past Tubbo and Tommy and sauntering towards his room despite their shrieks of delight when he entered.

Phil entered next, and unlike Techno, he stared at the two boys from the moment his eyes found them with a dawning horror. He dropped to his knees on the threshold so Tommy and Tubbo could see Trixten behind him, arms crossed and expression contrite as she looked down at her husband.

Tommy wasn't actually there when his parents had their first argument. He was sat in the next room, curled up in a ball with Tubbo holding him as they shouted at one another. Despite it being the day he remembered for their argument, he couldn't really hear what they were saying. He could still guess.

It began raining at some point, the howling wind sounding like mournful moans as it raced against the windows. It did nothing to quell the fear ebbing in Tommy's gut.

He did eventually manage to fall asleep in Tubbo's arms, long after midnight, and hours after they'd returned home. He could pretend the shouts were coming from next door if he tried hard enough. And he sure tried.

When he woke up, it was to Trixten gently shaking him awake with a soft smile.

"We've worked something out," She said as he rubbed the sleep from his eyes.

Tubbo leaned forwards, "We're not going to be ghosts forever, are we?"

Trixted laughed kindly, shaking her head, "No, no... You'll be given your corporeal bodies back again, the same ones as before."

"What is it then?"

Trixten sighed, leaning into Phil's hand when it landed on her shoulder in reassurance.

"How does immortality sound?"

Chapter Text

Listen, Ranboo didn't exactly agree with this, but they could admit it was a little bit fun. Griefing houses was fun.

He'd never done it before, and he'd probably never do it again, because the anxiety of getting caught was making them feel physically nauseous, but Tommy looked absolutely thrilled, and Ranboo really wanted friends, being new on the server and all. And it was fun, even with the anxious queasiness.

I mean, Tommy had even given him a burglar outfit so they could sneak around. Was it only leather armour he'd died black? Yes. But it was the thought that counted.

"Okay, okay," Tommy grinned, "Let's set the netherrack on fire and then get out of here."

He handed Ranboo a flint and steel, hopping up the configuration of netherrack that they'd set out and scaling it skillfully all the way to the roof. It wasn't exactly difficult to do, but he did it in such a way that Ranboo was sure this couldn't have been the first time he'd griefed a house exactly like this before.

Striking a fire, Ranboo watched as the deep red block lit up, fire contained. He'd feel absolutely terrible if it actually spread to George's house, but everyone knew netherrack didn't spread unless the nearest block was directly touching the fire, and the two of them had made sure the fire wouldn't spread.

It was just a bit of lighthearted griefing! No actual damage done, just a bit of an annoyance and nothing more.

That was just the kind of server this was. Ranboo had heard about the past conflicts, but this was a time of peace, and Tommy and him were just kids. Kids pulled pranks all the time, and then everyone laughed it off and moved on.

Well, Tubbo was the President, and he was also a kid. This server had a weird relationship with age and responsibility, but Tommy at least acted his age, like a rowdy teenager. And while Ranboo didn't exactly agree with everything he did, he could admit that Tommy was fun to hang out with.

Ranboo was told that they didn't act their age a lot, so being with Tommy had to be good for them, right?

"Fuck, shit, balls!" 

They'd evidently thought too soon.

Ranboo looked up just in time to lose sight of Tommy as the fire from a misplaced strike engulfed the roof. Tommy was trying to stamp it out, but it gotten too big, too quick. He was behind a wall of fire, potentially surrounded.

On instinct, Ranboo froze. This is definitely not what was meant to happen, so what the hell were they supposed to do? He didn't have a plan for this!

"Ranboo, you've got the water bucket!" He heard screeched. Oh right yeah, Ranboo scrambled for purchase of the bucket in his inventory, grabbing it and then freezing again.

He couldn't get up to the roof! The path Tommy had chartered was now on fire, being the netherrack the two of them had set alight.

"I can't get up there!"

"Throw it up then!" Tommy barely finished the sentence before he began hacking, lungs full of smoke and mouth dry.

"R-Right!" 

Ranboo took a steadying breath, eyes locked on where he needed the bucket to land to either spill and rid the roof of flames, or land in Tommy's hands so he could do it himself. He could do this. Tossing the bucket up, he watched as it arched through the air. Ranboo took a precautionary step back, avoiding the splash.

And it fell nowhere near where he'd intended it to. It managed to land behind the flames, and didn't even extinguish anything from what Ranboo could see.

"Thanks, big man!" Tommy coughed, and Ranboo could see what was left of the bucket being tipped at the worst of the fire. They sighed, at least they'd been able to do something right. He reached back into the inventory, but found nothing else that could help. As he was searching, he heard an absolutely terrifying scream, laced with pain and distress, from atop the roof.

"I don't have any more water!" Ranboo cried, feeling very useless from where he was now just stationed on the floor.

"Fuck, okay. Abort, abort, abort!!" Tommy yelled, and before Ranboo could anticipate what he was about to do, a very Tommy shaped human barreled out of the flames and was flying towards the floor.

Ranboo hissed, a panicked and strained noise, as he dodged out of the way of the flaming ball of Tommy. He only realised a second too late that that meant Tommy had nothing to land on, and instead watched as he splat onto the floor, landing with such intensity his face made contact with the dirt then dragged. His hair was still on fire.

Ranboo stared, long arms wrapped around themselves in defense, before his brain caught up with his eyes. Right, there was a burning house and a burning boy in front of them. He should probably make sure Tommy was okay then get the two of them out of here before anyone caught them.

Arms detaching, Ranboo squat down beside Tommy's head, lightly patting the fire out whilst also attempting to rouse him enough for them to flee.

But Tommy didn't move.

"Tommy?" Ranboo whispered, because very suddenly the time for being loud and fun was over, and he was sure that if he raised his voice anymore someone was going to track them down and find them. Still Tommy didn't move.

Feeling panic arise in him, Ranboo flipped the boy over, because being face down in mud couldn't be good and probably wouldn't help in waking up. He was caked in dirt and ash and his leather armour had melted and warped, which wasn't helping with Ranboo's rising panic, and he definitely wasn't moving, and if they didn't move soon, something terrible was going to happen. 

So Ranboo did all that he could do. He dragged Tommy by the armpits towards the nearest thicket of trees. As a deadweight, the kid was heavy. But whatever. Getting hidden was easy, actually waking Tommy up was Ranboo's priority now.

Using a handkerchief, Ranboo slowly began cleaning the debris off Tommy's face. After being knocked out, Ranboo wouldn't particularly want to wake up in grime. There was blackened ash under the mud, which Ranboo tried to delicately remove at first, then scrub at a bit harder when it didn't budge.

After one particulary rough wipe, it all came loose to reveal only muscle and blood. Ranboo cursed, looking back at the handkerchief and realising that had been Tommy's burnt skin he'd just peeled off.

And the very physical feeling of nausea became the very real vomit forced out of his mouth, landing in a puddle a few metres away as Ranboo staggered away from his friend's corpse.

That was Tommy's final life. Ranboo had been told about Tommy's other deaths, and this was his final one. He was perma-dead. And it was all Ranboo's fault. It definitely looked like Ranboo's fault.

Shit, griefing George's house was small potatoes in comparison to this. And Tubbo was Tommy's best friend, Ranboo was so getting banned from L'Manburg if they weren't just killed on the spot.

Oh shit, oh shit, oh shit, Ranboo was literally going to die. Everyone was going to kill him until he was dead, and he deserved it too.

Letting out a despondant warbling sound, they fell to their knees and found solace in leaning against the nearest tree, its solid weight the only thing keeping him from total despair.

Right, he couldn't just pretend Tommy wasn't dead. He'd have to bring his corpse back to L'Manburg, keep his head hung, and take whatever punishment they handed him with grace and dignity. Maybe he could run before they sentenced him to death, but he understood if someone just killed him on site. Afterall, he had all three lives. 

It couldn't hurt more than a country founder being perma-dead. Forever.

His cheeks burned as he began to cry, stinging in a way that could barely mean anything, not when he'd just wiped the skin off the cheek of his friend. Who cared if it hurt? It's not like he deserved peace and tranquility anymore.

"Can you be done with your self flagellation now?"

Ranboo's head snapped back to Tommy, eyes wide and breath gone. The boy was sitting right where Ranboo had left him, wiping the dirt off his face and peeling his burnt skin off to reveal his smooth, non-charred face behind. The patch of skin Ranboo had scraped off had healed itself, still covered in blood, but no longer just muscle.

"T-Tommy?" Ranboo stammered, pushing himself up the tree trunk so he could stagger over to the boy.

"Who else?" Tommy grinned toothily, pulling a large chunk of skin off his jaw, revealing another completely unphased piece of skin underneath.

"I- But you were just--"

"Dead?" Tommy huffed, gesturing for Ranboo to put a hand out to help him up. Robotically, Ranboo did. When he was on his feet and brushing himself off, Tommy grimaced, "Yeah, I get that a lot. But I'm not! Dead, that is."

"But you were..." Ranboo's voice shook as he remembered the lifeless, charred body.

"Not moving, not breathing? All together looking pretty dead?" Tommy licked his lips, then spat out the debris that made its way into his mouth, "Well, I'm not."

"How?" 

"Got better," Tommy shugged, groaning as he began to shake himself out, "Y'know what, could you shoot a message to Tubbo really quick? Say 'I think Tommy just died but he's alright now can you come over??' with two question marks, that's important, and send him our co-ords." 

Ranboo almost did exactly that, but they faltered before hitting send.

"Uh, I don't know if you remember but George's house is currently burning really near us right now," He supplied when Tommy gave him a imploring look.

Tommy groaned, running a hand down his face, "Ugh, right yeah, whatever. Lemme just--"

He bolted out of the treeline before Ranboo could stop him, and before Ranboo could do anything else, he was back, smelling like fire.

"Okay, I sorted it," Tommy gave Ranboo a quick thumbs up, "Now message Tubbo."

"Uh. Okay."

"What the fuck did you two do?!"

The crows in the trees flew away at the loud noise, Ranboo noticed.

"Relax, you're the President," Tommy rolled his eyes, "You can get us off on bail."

"This is the monarch's house, idiot," Tubbo slapped his friend up the head, "I don't have the power to pardon your every move, especially in the Greater SMP!" 

"I'm the one that put the fire out!" Tommy scoffed, "Eventually."

"...Eventually?" 

"I couldn't whip out my cool fountain powers in front of Ranboo," Tommy made a motion like he was Spiderman about to use his webs. Whatever that meant.

Tubbo gave Ranboo a side eye, but it felt more like they were an afterthought than the main attraction.

"But you regenerated in front of him."

"No," Tommy shook his head obviously, like Tubbo was dumb, "He was having a mental breakdown when I regenerated. Wasn't even looking at me."

Tubbo let out a harsh breath, palms of his hands pressing into his eyes. He marched a few steps away from Tommy before turning back and yelling as loud as Ranboo thought was possible.

"But they know you regenerated?" 

Tommy glanced at Ranboo. Ranboo looked somewhere else.

"Uh... I never told them explicitly?" Tommy said with some weight behind it. It seemed like he was starting to take Tubbo seriously, "Look, Tubs, how about we just go to the bunker and--"

"No!" Tubbo cried, "No, we're not just forgetting about this and moving on. We've kept it a secret for so long--"

"You think I was purposefully trying to die?"

"Of course not! But I have been so overworked and over-stressed since becoming President, and I can't have my Vice President acting like this!" Tubbo gestured towards the house, gestured towards Tommy, gestured towards Ranboo. 

"We were just having a bit of fun--"

"He's the King, Tommy! You don't grief the King! And you don't go showing off your biggest secret to a random newbie on the server!"

"Well sorry, Mr President," Tommy crossed his arms across his chest, and Ranboo would do anything to not be here for this argument right now, "Didn't realise you'd never made a mistake in your life."

"Not on this level!" Tubbo cried, "What am I meant to do if George complains, if Dream comes poking and prodding and blaming L'Manburg for this because now I know you did it! And you told Ranboo about the regeneration! Can I not trust you with anything?" 

Tommy scoffed, "Oh, that's fucking low, you bitch. Prime forbid I want to act my age instead of being bossed around by Dream all the time."

"I am not bossed around by Dream," Tubbo scowled, "I'm doing my job, keeping this country that I helped make afloat. I have a responsibility that you don't seem to be able to grasp. All because you want to act like a child."

"I am a child! Both of us are children! Hell, all three of us are children!" Tommy threw his arms out towards Ranboo, who was mostly mortified that they both still remembered he was there.

"We have not been children in a long time," Tubbo said coldly. Tommy kissed his teeth, rolling his eyes in response.

"We are children. We're going to be grown up children dealing with the fallout from our childhood for forever, actually. And you acting like we're not is just--"

"I don't have time to think like that, Tommy. We grew up the moment we had to start keeping a secret from our own brother as kids--"

"No we didn't. We cried. We sobbed and we were still kids as we learned that life isn't fair, but we could be fair to each oth--"

"Exactly, we couldn't rely on anyone but ourselves, pretty fucking adult to m--"

"Oh come on, that's not what being an adult is--"

"Yeah, well, you know what's very fucking adult? Killing someone." Tubbo spat, "And who's the first person that killed me?"

Tommy stumbled back like the words had crashed into him in a wave too big to bare. His mouth hung open, previously forming a response and now just flat out shocked. He blinked. He blinked again, looking away from Tubbo, a weak laugh pushing its way out of his lips.

Tubbo, for his part, seemed equally as shocked that he'd just said those words. He had paled at an alarming rate, and while he still looked furious, Ranboo wasn't so sure that that fury was soley directed at Tommy anymore.

Ranboo themself had just learned many things about his new friends and would have really quite liked to not be there anymore.

Tommy was the first to speak after the ensuing silence.

"Right," He nodded weakly, taking another step away. He swallowed, a hand coming up to his mouth just to wipe at his lips as he thought, "Okay. Yeah okay. Right... I'm gonna, uh. Go. Now."

"Tommy, I didn't mean it," Tubbo said, and it sounded like a plea and apology in one.

Tommy's nod - he hadn't stopped nodding - became stronger, eyes dragging back to Tubbo again, "No, yeah, I understand exactly what you meant."

"Tommy, no." Tubbo took a halting step forwards, but stopped immediately when Tommy held up his hands in a peaceful motion, but very clearly communicated his need for space.

"Come on, Tubbo," He smiled ruefully, "We both know it's always my fault when things go wrong."

And with that he walked off. Not ran, just walked. It was nearly a saunter. He anticipated neither would follow him. 

And he was right.

Tubbo watched his go, and Ranboo watched Tubbo watch him go, and felt his gut churn at the many things that had just happened, far too quickly for Ranboo to process.

The burning of George's house, the burning of Tommy and his... death, his 'regeneration' as Tubbo and Tommy put it, the realisation that Tubbo also knew about it, the storming bad mood Tubbo had quickly decended into, the fight, the admission that Tommy had once killed Tubbo??? And now his leaving.

That was all... a bit much. To put it lightly.

When Tommy was gone far enough away that he was barely visible anymore, Tubbo finally moved again. With a swift kick, a large rock by Tubbo's foot was very quickly not by Tubbo's foot anymore.

"Shit, shit, shit," He muttered, threading his fingers through his hair and yanking it as his eyes filled with tears. It looked very painful. 

"Uh. Please don't do that." Ranboo said smartly.

"Shut up!" Tubbo snapped, tears falling, "No, shit, I'm sorry, you didn't ask to be here, I'm sorry."

"It's okay..." Ranboo shuffled forwards, placing a tentative hand on Tubbo's back, "You've obviously got a lot going on."

Tubbo made a noise that was half a sniff and half a laugh, "You could say that."

And they stood in silence for a few minutes while Tubbo's shoulders shook and Ranboo soothed him through it. As much as it was nice to have a quiet moment after all the commotion that had just transpired, there were many questions gnawing at Ranboo's mind that wouldn't be tamed for a long, long time if he didn't ask them soon.

"What just happened, if you don't mind me asking?" He asked softly when Tubbo seemed like he was coming down.

"All stuff you weren't meant to see," Tubbo rubbed a hand down his face, wiping the tears away, quickly, neatly, "You cannot breathe a word of this to anyone, got it? Not the burning of George's house, not the regeneration stuff."

"Am I allowed to ask about the regeneration stuff?" Ranboo asked tentatively. He knew he was already pushing his luck, "Now. I'll never speak of it again afterwards."

Tubbo's jaw clenched, but he sighed a long, slow breath. He looked so tired, in a way that really reflected how few wrinkles he had.

"Me and Tommy are kind of... unkillable?" He didn't look at Ranboo, which could mean a multitude of things, but most of all it felt truthful, "Sort of immortals, I guess. We regenerate rather than respawn. And we can do it infinitely. Don't ask about how to also be immortal. We made sure no-one else could suffer like we did."

"Wasn't going to," Ranboo reassured, "I don't think I'd be able to handle being an immortal. I think I'll probably be happier when I'm dead." He laughed, a soft, self-deprecating thing.

"Right," Tubbo chuckled softly, then as he sobered he looked back at where Tommy had gone, "I need to go find him. I really need to talk to him and apologise. What I said was really out of line."

"About him killing you?" Ranboo had to admit, that was one of the biggest bombshells they both did and didn't want to know more about.

"Yeah," Tubbo breathed, looking more and more guilty by the second. He rushed to continue, "It's not his fault. It was never his fault, we were just stupid kids that didn't know how dangerous the world could be. I spoke out of anger rather than reason, and now all the work he's done to stop blaming himself has probably gone down the drain."

Ranboo smiled weakly. At least his friend wasn't a murderer, he supposed, "Sounds pretty childish of you, letting your emotions rule your decisions like that."

"Ha, I guess so," Tubbo laughed wryly, "You get back to L'Manburg now Ranboo, tell them I've been called away on an emergency state visit to the Badlands, I don't know how long I'll be gone. I have a feeling Tommy hasn't gone somewhere easy to find."

"I can do that... I don't know how Quackity and Fundy will respond to it, though."

"Oh, screw them," Tubbo scoffed, grasping one of Ranboo's hands in his, "Please, cover me for this and I'll owe you one."

"I'm really not the best liar," Ranboo grimaced, but shook his head to rid himself of the thoughts, "But I'll do my best. Your secrets' are safe with me."

"Thank you," Tubbo squeezed his hand, genuine relief flooding his words.

Ranboo smiled, shaking the hand clasped in his reassuringly. When Tubbo finally let go and began walking in the direction Tommy had gone, Ranboo sighed, letting himself collapse onto the floor.

Far too much had happened today.