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When Lord Bridgerton had excused himself before seeing her sister, Edwina had never been so tempted to throw her tea into his face. It may only be lukewarm, but that was not the true retribution. She had come to understand the viscount more since speaking with her sister. For a man such as him, the humiliation of kicking him out of Danbury House with the stain obvious on his suit would be the best punishment of all.
Luckily for him, he had seen her expression and explained that he could not approach Kate empty-handed. That had been days ago. He had estimated what he planned to give her to be ready by today, and yet he had made no appearance. So now, here she sat with Kate. Her sister read a book, while Edwina tried her best to focus on her sewing. It took far longer than normal for such a simple pattern as she couldn’t stop glancing out the window, wondering where he could possibly be. He was only lucky that they hadn’t announced the end of their engagement yet. As Kate had spent no time seeking her own suitors, it left their drawing room blessedly empty.
“Edwina,” Kate said hesitantly. She had changed since her not-so-secret morning ride. Even though she had clearly been confused, she had thankfully listened to Edwina’s insistence that she wear her best day dress. Although bright yellow was never worn by the ton – save by that lovely girl, Penelope Featherington – it complimented Kate’s dark skin beautifully. Her sister had ordered her lady’s maid to pull her hair straight back, but she had reluctantly acquiesced to Edwina’s assertion that leaving a few curls loose in the front would frame her face to perfection. (And it had.)
“Do not look at me like that, Didi,” Edwina said. Though she was nervous about finding a husband, speaking with Lord Bridgerton the day before had been exactly what she needed to firmly close that door behind her. “I am not so fragile as to allow one man’s rejection to break me.”
Kate’s jaw, already naturally sharp, clenched in annoyance. “That does not give him the right to toss you to the side.”
“It was a mutual decision,” Edwina said patiently.
That earned her a scoff. “And to dare to ask you to keep it a secret! What good is preventing scandal if his plan requires you to keep up this pretense? You cannot find a husband if the men of the ton do not think you an option!”
“We must do this perfectly, Didi, or we risk the ton’s scorn” Edwina carefully put down her sewing needles and the incomplete handkerchief as to not unwind her current progress. She stood up and moved to her sister’s side so she could grab her hands, even though this new position meant she couldn’t spy on someone walking up to Danbury House. “Patience is a virtue we must uphold. We have no choice but to trust Lady Danbury and Lady Bridgerton to do this in a way as to not encourage questions. ‘When an elephant is in trouble even a frog will kick him.’”
The Indian proverb made her sister smile at her with pride. “When did you become so wise?”
“I like to think I always was. I merely never spoke up like I ought to. And wisdom unspoken is wisdom wasted, is it not?” Edwina said. That was the very reason she couldn’t place the blame at Kate’s feet for their current situation. Not without claiming some for herself. For she had been the one to remain silent as others made her decisions for her. Her sister. The queen. The viscount. But taking back control didn’t make her fate as a woman any less decided. Yet that was not reason enough to give up. Even though she could not change the direction of the wind, she could adjust the sails. “You once asked me what I should like in a husband, and I would like to add something to the list. I long for a man who does not wish for only one part of me. I wish for a husband who values my mind as much as he values my heart.”
Kate’s hand squeezed her own. “You deserve nothing less, Bon.”
Their conversation was interrupted by Lady Danbury’s head butler. (Finally!) Hands behind his back, he said, “Lord Bridgerton to see Miss Sharma.”
As soon as Kate absorbed his words, her grip became painful as an angry blush colored her cheeks. “Tell him I am not accepting visitors.”
Carefully as to not startle her, Edwina pulled her hands from her sister as she stood up. “Pay no attention to her. Please send him in, Yates. And please fetch us a new pot of tea. Oh! And some raspberry scones. I do believe I remember Lord Bridgerton enjoying those in Aubrey Hall.”
Though it was obvious that Yates would prefer to listen to Kate, he eventually gave a reluctant nod before leaving them alone. It seemed the cook had not warned him of her secret mission that morning to prepare the viscount’s favorite snack, so it would be ready upon arrival.”
Immediately, Kate turned to face her. Her chest rose and fell quickly in anger as she hissed, “Edwina, what are you thinking?”
“Do not tell me you have forgotten your plan already. You have already begged for my forgiveness, yet I seem to remember there was another step you seem to be neglecting. I know that you are thinking of my happiness first, as you have always done, but do not use me as an excuse to run away from true love. This is your chance,” Edwina said. She still didn’t sit down as she picked back up her sewing needles. When her sister just looked down, she adopted her best ‘big sister’ voice as she said firmly, “Kathani Sharma, you have never been a coward. Don’t you dare start now.”
The door opened once more, only this time Yates was not alone. Before turning to face him, Kate swallowed and offered her a curt nod in acceptance. Thank goodness she saw sense, or Edwina didn’t know what she would’ve done.
“Lord Bridgerton, welcome,” Edwina said. She offered him a perfunctory curtsy, smirking when his eyes stayed firmly planted firmly on her sister. She waved to the servants who waited patiently behind him before continuing, “I have ordered us some tea and raspberry scones. Your favorites.”
The viscount cleared his throat as he stepped out of the servant’s way. He glanced at the tray for barely one second before his eyes snapped back to the object of all his desires. And there his gaze stayed even as he addressed her, “Thank you for thinking of me, Miss Edwina.”
Was he always so obvious?
Finally, he stepped all the way into the room. Only then did Edwina notice what was in his hands. Three bouquets, one much larger than the others.
Clearing his throat, he first offered one of the small ones to Edwina. He held the other matching one out as he looked around the room. “My apologies. I– I had brought this for Lady Mary.”
“What a gentleman,” Edwina said, unable to hide the amusement from her tone. It was hard not to giggle at how nervous he was. It seemed Kate could make even the most intimidating man shake in his boots. Smile in place, she offered her bouquet to Yates and motioned for Lord Bridgerton to hand her mother’s to him as well. “We will be sure to tell her of your consideration.”
The viscount cleared his throat once more as he offered her a jerky nod. He focused back on Kate, and his Adam’s apple bobbed. He held out the largest bouquet: a beautiful arrangement with lilies as the center point, surrounded by both hydrangeas and orchids that added a perfect pop of both texture and color.
It was exotic and bold. And it was impossible to miss how well the bouquet described Kate. Passion and rebirth. Grace and harmony. Strength and beauty.
“For you, Miss Sharma,” Lord Bridgerton said, his voice surprisingly soft.
Instead of saying anything, Kate simply reached up to accept the flowers, her anger seemingly replaced by a soft look of awe. She breathed in the flowers’ scents as she admitted quietly, “I’ve never received flowers.”
Once more, guilt punched into Edwina’s stomach. Her sister had shined her light on her for so long. It was time for her to shine all on her own.
Subtly, Edwina motioned for the servants to place the tea pot in front of her sofa instead of Kate’s. She sat down before motioning the viscount to take his place next to her sister. “Please, sit, Lord Bridgerton.”
It was quite funny how quick the viscount was to follow the order, even as he seemed to have completely forgotten the English language. For he only sat and stared at her sister, who was still admiring her flowers.
While the pair were both assertive to the point of being obstinate, Edwina took a deep breath as she began to pour their tea. She kept chanting in her head a firm reminder that while the pair had no qualms about being headstrong, it was the first time they both dared to be heartstrong.
The tea pot had been specially brewed the correct way after Kate had offered the kitchen staff lessons. (A happy event that had occurred after Kate horrified them by insisting to brew their own pot. Happily, the cook was a quick study.) Her sister was right that English tea was truly awful, and Edwina needed to prime them for this conversation with their favorite food and drinks.
“Sugar or honey, my lord?” Edwina asked.
“No, thank you.”
An awkward silence hung in the room as Edwina added honey to both her and her sister’s own cups. After the seconds ticked passed, each more tense than the last, Edwina eventually gave up and asked, “Any news from your mother?”
Clearly relieved for the help, Lord Bridgerton shook his head. “Not yet. She plans to meet with Lady Danbury and your mother today.” Suddenly, his eyes widened, and he looked around the room as if just noticing something. His jaw clenched as he took visible efforts to remain calm. “I did not realize she meant to meet with them so early. Shall we call for a lady’s maid?”
“Whatever for?” Edwina asked innocently. Her tone caught Kate’s attention, and her eyes finally snapped away from the bouquet. ignoring her gaze, narrowed in suspicion as it was, Edwina kept her attention on the viscount. “I know that chaperones are traditionally married women and servants, but I do believe that it can be any relative. Can it not?”
Kate’s eyes widened as she sputtered, “Ed– Edwina, you cannot mean that.”
Edwina merely handed them both their teacups, smirk in place as she waited for Kate to carefully place the bouquet on her lap. After her sister accepted her cup, Edwina picked up her own and made to stand. “Do not mind me. I will be sitting just over there. Please, act as if I’m not here.”
Ignoring Kate’s protests, Edwina moved over to sit at the window seat. She took a delicate sip of her tea before setting it down and picking up the book she had hid there earlier. She ignored Kate’s surprised huff, realizing Edwina had planned this all along, and began to read. Or rather, she began to pretend to read. It was a book she had read before, so she could listen to their conversation without care that it would ruin the flow of the narrative.
Finally seeming to find his courage, the viscount took a deep breath. When he finally spoke, it seemed that she had overestimated yet again. “It is fine weather we are having, is it not?”
Was that really the best he could do? Edwina couldn’t bite back her scoff, but the pair were already consumed by one another. His feeble attempt made Kate glare at him, and suddenly it was as if they were the only two in the world.
Eyes wide in disbelief, the challenge in Kate’s answer was obvious, “You wish to speak to me of the weather?”
The viscount’s own voice was amusedly high when he asked, “Is there another topic of conversation that’d be more appropriate?”
Judging by her loud exhale, it seemed Kate shared her incredulity. A quick glance up told Edwina that the pair were now scandalously close with their knees touching, fully consumed by one another.
“There’s nothing appropriate about what you’re doing,” Kate hissed. “You end your engagement with my sister, and yet you call on her not a week later. Why?”
The fire in the viscount’s glare was foreign to Edwina, as was the desire hiding behind his anger. “I have not seen you on your morning ride.”
Ah, yes, Kate had told her all about that. How she had met the viscount before their first ball. It seemed they had even shared a spontaneous race in the park.
Her sister kept her head high as she bit out, “No, I have taken liking to a different route.”
“Indeed. I cannot say I blame you,” Lord Bridgerton said. He raised his hand as if to pull at his collar before he caught himself. His hand stopped awkwardly midair before he moved to drink his tea. Stalling. “I did not call on Miss Edwina. I–”
“That does not make it better, my lord,” Kate said. She shook her head in denial as she unintentionally mirrored the viscount’s pose, leaning into him further. “It is bad enough that you ended the engagement. And you dare to come here when you know that the servants will talk? You can say the engagement was mutual all you wish, but we both know what the ton will believe, sir. Need I remind you that–”
And then the viscount made a novice mistake. He interrupted. “It was a mutual decision–”
“And now you dare leave it to our mothers to clean up your mess,” Kate continued as if she had not heard him. “You claim you are a gentleman, and yet you take no responsibility for your actions.”
“I did no such thing, Miss Sharma,” Lord Bridgerton said. The teacup rattled noisily as his hands shook, but he didn’t seem to notice. “I spoke over our options with my mother last night... and she insisted to speak to them alone. She has it in her head that I would only make it worse, so she wants to broach the topic without my presence. Once the ladies understand the situation, we will all speak together–”
“Is that so?” Kate challenged. She took a shaky breath as the viscount’s gaze darted down to her lips. “And did you think to consult Edwina in your plans? Or did you simply decide that this was the best course of action on your own?”
Never before had Edwina been witness to such obvious desire. She had seen love before in her own parents, to be sure, but theirs was a soft, safe love. Was it even possible to have a love that had both? Love that was passionate yet steady?
So entrapped by the obvious love between the two, a tangible thing so potent it filled the room, Edwina nearly missed what Kate had said. And the realization made it hard not to smile. Not only did Kate defend her. She demanded Lord Bridgerton treat Edwina as an adult grown.
“They aren’t my plans,” Lord Bridgerton said. Whatever nerves he had felt earlier had clearly disappeared in the heat of the argument, though the conversation had so clearly derailed from his original goal in coming there. “It was Miss Edwina who first suggested we ask for their help, and I readily agreed. I learned the power women hold in the ton last season. When my sister was threatened, it was my mother who saved her. In the matter of a few days, she had scared that poor excuse of the man from the whole of London.”
Even when Edwina was mentioned, she was still a forgotten existence in the corner of the room. Instead, Edwina watched in confusion how the two remained so transfixed on another. Had she truly been so blind? How had she missed the way they loved each other to distraction?
“That does not explain why you are here,” Kate said. Her lips pursed as she tilted her chin out defiantly. “Assumptions will be made, my lord, and I would not wish to trap you in such an unthinkable fate.”
That gave Edwina pause. Not so much her words spoken as the way she said them. Had the viscount insulted her before? Had Edwina made a mistake by giving him this chance?
The viscount took several deep breathes as the pair teetered closer for just a moment, his eyes again falling to her lips before snapping back up. He had confessed during their last meeting how he had pursued Kate, even when Edwina was the one that he had officially courted. It had certainly been a blow to her ego, only it was more than that, too. It made her wonder if he was honorable enough to trust with her sister’s heart. A shadow of doubt had remained, but as Edwina watched them with each other now, she finally understood. It was not that he was incapable of remaining faithful to his wife; it was only that he was incapable of remaining faithful to anyone who was not Kate.
“It is. It is an unthinkable fate,” Lord Bridgerton said finally. When Kate flinched, he took another deep breath through his nose, his nostrils flaring. Instead of noticing Edwina’s murderous intent (could she hit him with her sewing needle from so great a distance?), he stayed intent on her sister. “I do not have to tell you that I did not enter this season seeking a love match. You already heard me speak quite plainly the kind of marriage I sought for myself.
“What you do not know is that my sentiment was apparently a shock for the ton. More than one husband-seeking mama spoke about how devotedly my parents loved one another. They assumed I wished the same thing. How could I not? When I had grown up witnessing that such unconditional love was more than a fantasy? That it was truly possible to love someone so devotedly? But that is the very reason I never wanted it.
“I know it is poor of me to offer such excuses. My behavior was inexcusable. I only wish– I do not care what they think of me. But I do– your opinion has always mattered. It is the only one that has carried such weight. You are no stranger to loss. I know this, but my mother– You must understand. When my father– when he was– my mother was inconsolable. She was broken. She was pregnant when it happened, and when Hyacinth was born, there were– there were complications. I was asked to choose between my mother and Hyacinth should– should they only be able to save one.”
The image of her sister and the viscount became blurry as Edwina’s eyes filled with tears. Even though she had recently become aware of how she took her older sister for granted, she still underestimated the weight that had been on her shoulders. It was clear that Lord Bridgerton had not been given the opportunity to grieve, and Edwina realized with great shame that Kate hadn’t been either.
“Even after Hyacinth was born, my mother only came out of her room when forced. She– she once told me that he was the air she breathed. Without him, there was no air. It took her years to return her to daily habits, but she’s never been the same. Even now, over a decade later, she still misses him every single day. It still hurts her to think of him. I decided long ago, that if that was love, I didn’t want it. My father was the best man I knew. If he could be killed by such a small creature, what fate awaited me?
“I knew I would never live up to his memory, but I could make a promise. I would never marry for love. I would never cause someone that pain. It was unthinkable,” Lord Bridgerton. He looked down at his hands as they tensed in and out of fists. “I could never marry for love. I could never doom someone to love me only to lose me.”
Cursing herself for not finishing her handkerchief, Edwina wiped away her tears as subtly as she could manage. While this was proof that the viscount had never held any kind of regard for her, she suddenly realized she was glad for it. Instead, she was only relieved. Relieved that the viscount’s love for her sister was so powerful. Surely, if he had fallen in love with her despite being determined to never give his heart to anyone, then it could overcome anything.
It seemed that Edwina was not the only Sharma moved by his speech. Hesitantly, Kate reached out to grab his hand. She swallowed as she shook her head. “I do not know what to say.”
“I do. I’ve always known. I’ve known all along what I was too foolish and too scared to admit, even to myself,” Lord Bridgerton said. He brought Kate’s hand up to lips, kissing her knuckles. Her sister gasped, and he hooked her in place with a look. “And that is that I love you.”
Do not squeal. Do not make a single sound. Don’t you dare do anything that could ruin this moment.
And the viscount wasn’t even done. It seemed he had finally found his courage, and he wasn’t going to waste another moment. “I’ve loved you from the moment we raced each other in that park. I’ve loved you at every dance, on every walk, every time we’ve been together, and every time we’ve been apart. You do not have to accept it or embrace it or even allow it. Knowing you, you probably will not. But you must know it, in your heart. You must feel it, because I do. I love you.”
Her sister, so unused to chasing her own happiness, shook her head. “You– you do not play fair, my lord. I do not know what to say.”
“You do not have to say anything–”
“I do not think there is anything to say,” Kate persisted. She took a deep breath. “Except I love you, too.”
Never before had Edwina thought Lord Bridgerton capable of being adorable, yet the way his eyes widened as joy so clearly took over his face was too heart-warming to deny. He brought her sister’s knuckles to his lips again. “I know I am imperfect, but I will humble myself before you because I cannot imagine my life without you, and that is why I wish to marry you.”
Kate’s answering grin was radiant.
And then the viscount continued, “But I cannot. Not yet.”
Men! Why were they all so stupid?
“I beg your pardon?” Kate demanded, anger instantaneous.
“You deserve more than a rushed engagement, Miss Sharma. You deserve to be courted and romanced,” Lord Bridgerton said. “I want to show everyone how proud I am to love you.”
Well, it seemed that Edwina would not have to commit murder today after all. She delicately cleared her throat, and the way they both jumped in their seat proved they had really taken her orders seriously. They had completely forgotten she was there.
“I couldn’t agree more, my lord. I expect you to spoil my sister the way she deserves,” Edwina said. She smiled at Kate, whose attention was now solely dedicated to confirming she was alright. “I am so happy for you, Didi.”
Kate’s mouth wobbled. As someone who never liked to speak when she was overly emotional, she merely offered her a nod.
“Excuse me, my lord... is there anything else you’re forgetting?” Edwina asked. She gave him a pointed look when he simply stared back at her, confused. “Something you wished to give my sister?”
The viscount blushed as he nodded. With a shaking hand he looked around before sighing. “Forgive me, but could you please ring for the butler? I did not want to assume your sister’s acceptance.”
Edwina smiled as she stood to ring for the servant. And she nearly broke out laughing when not a moment later Benedict Bridgerton walked inside. He offered her a wink as he carefully held a square wooden case.
Immediately, Lord Bridgerton shot out of his chair. “Benedict, what are you doing here?”
“Now, now, brother. Contain your excitement,” Mr. Bridgerton said. “I saw our carriage outside the Sharmas and, after our last conversation, wondered what was happening. Imagine my surprise when I was told–”
“Yes, yes, enough out of you,” Lord Bridgerton said. He huffed when his brother just raised his brows in amusement. He walked forward to accept the wooden case before reclaiming his seat. Glancing back nervously at both his brother and Edwina, he turned back around to face Kate, clearing his throat. “For you, Miss Sharma.”
At Kate’s surprised gasp, Edwina didn’t bother with pretense as she hurried around the sofa that she could get a better look, with Mr. Bridgerton on her heels.
“Oh my!” Edwina exclaimed.
The necklace was unlike anything she’d ever seen. The opal had been cut like teardrops falling down. Several rows were designed to fall down the collarbone, opals each delicately hanging off each other in a track of tears. And every single gemstone held a rainbow of color reflecting in the light.
“I had this piece commissioned,” Lord Bridgerton explained to their shock. Well, at least that explained the reason it had taken him a week to come back. “I know that I have brought you pain, Miss Sharma, but this necklace is my promise. From now on, I shall only make you cry tears of happiness. Opals are said to symbolize hope, but more than that, they are said to symbolize truth. And I am done hiding from the fact that I’m in love with you.”
It seemed Kate was truly overwhelmed, for when she finally looked up from the jewelry to the viscount, it was to say absolutely nothing.
“And don’t worry, Didi.” Edwina's voice was embarrassingly hoarse from emotion. Taking a deep breath, she reached out to squeeze her sister’s shoulder. “Lord Bridgerton has already asked for my blessing. You are free to follow your heart. No matter what answer you give him, we will figure it out. Together.”
While Mr. Bridgerton gave her an approving nod, Kate took her time studying her. When she found that Edwina was sincere, she smiled and looked back at the viscount who loved her. She was practically giddy as she said, “There will never be a day that you do not vex me.”
Instead of irritation that most gentleman would display, Lord Bridgerton just smirked at her, his brown eyes shining with his love. “Is that a promise, Kathani Sharma?”
And Edwina was content in the knowledge that her sister had finally found her match.