Archive of Our Own ^beta

Chapter Text

Techno hurried through the hallways to his classroom, going as fast as he could while still technically walking. He pushed open the door two hours after school started and walked to the front of the classroom to hand his tardy slip to the teacher. 

“See! I told you, he’s always late!” a girl who was in his class last year called out smugly. 

Techno’s face burned. He didn’t want that reputation with his teacher, certainly not in the first week of school.

“Well, nice of you to join us, Technoblade,” the teacher said and handed him a packet that the class was working on at their desks.

It wasn’t his fault. He didn’t want to be late to school, he hated missing school. It wasn’t his fault that Mom didn’t come home until late this morning and he couldn’t leave Tommy home alone. It wasn’t his fault that he had to get Wilbur to school before he could get himself there.

~~~

When Techno and Wilbur got home, Mom was waiting by the front door, dressed to go out and holding her purse.

“Good, you’re home. Watch Tommy. Don’t open the door for strangers. There’s food in the fridge. I won’t be back tonight. Bye. Love you.”

And she was out the door.

“Love you too,” Techno whispered as he moved forward to lock the door.

Wilbur had already moved further into the apartment and was telling Tommy about his day. Techno leaned back against the door and took a deep breath. He could do this. He’d done it before. He could handle it.

~~~

Techno couldn’t do this anymore. He couldn’t handle it. Mom hadn’t been home in five days now and Techno hadn’t gone to school in the last three. His teacher called Wilbur’s school to see if he had been in school and Wilbur’s teacher asked Techno why he hadn’t been at school when he picked Wilbur up after school. He made up some lie about how he hadn’t been feeling well so he wasn’t going to school, because he couldn’t tell her the truth, that he wasn’t in school because he had to watch his baby brother and his mom wasn’t home. He guessed he could have kept Wilbur at home too, but Wilbur was in 1st grade. That was a really important grade and Techno wasn’t a good teacher. He tried to teach Wilbur stuff over the summer, but he got frustrated too quickly and then Wilbur said he was mean and that he didn’t want to be with him anymore. Techno would deny it if anyone ever asked, because he was a big kid and big kids don’t cry, but he had locked himself in the closet in their bedroom and cried for half an hour after that. 

He didn’t think Wilbur’s teacher believed him, but he couldn’t tell the truth, right? Mom said that, if he told people, that he’d lose Tommy and Wilbur because their daddy had other family that would take them but not him. Their daddy had died before Tommy was born. Techno didn’t know his daddy, but he knew he wasn’t the same as theirs. Techno couldn’t lose his brothers, they were too important. So he couldn’t tell anyone. But he didn’t think he could keep doing this either. Mom had never been gone for this long before and he was getting worried. The food left in the fridge and pantry was running out. He couldn’t keep missing school. Most of all he hated lying to Wilbur and telling him everything was ok when he asked where Mom was. He couldn’t anymore and he made a decision. 

~~~

The next morning he begged the older lady in the apartment next to theirs, who they were supposed to go to in case of emergencies, to watch Tommy. Then he had gotten Wilbur to school on time and himself to school only ten minutes late. The teacher looked surprised to see him, which felt awful. He waited until they were working independently on a packet at their desks before going to the teacher’s desk.

“Can I go talk to the counselor?” Techno whispered.

The teacher looked at him for a long while like they wanted to ask if he was ok. Techno bit his lip and looked down to the side. 

“Alright, take the hall pass with you.”

Techno nodded and grabbed it on his way out of the classroom. He had been sent to the counselor a couple times last year because of how often he was late and stuff like that so he found the office easily. He knocked on the open door and peeked his head in.

“Mr. Sam?”

“Hey, Technoblade. C’mon in, bud.”

Techno closed the door behind himself and sat down in one of the comfortable chairs, but sat tensely on the edge of the seat. 

“What’s up?” 

Mr. Sam leaned forward slightly to show he was listening. Techno shifted where he sat.

“If… If I tell you something, can you promise… that I won’t lose my brothers. Please, I can’t lose Wilbur and Tommy, but-” 

His bottom lip wobbled. 

“I- I can’t-” 

He pressed the palms of his hands into his eye sockets. Big kids don’t cry.

“I can’t do it. Please.”

“Ok, Technoblade, what’s going on?”

“Do you promise?!” Techno insisted, breathing heavily.

“I can promise that I will try my best to make sure nothing bad happens to you and your brothers, but that’s all I can say without knowing what’s going on,” Sam explained.

Techno let out a low whine and pulled at his hair. Was that good enough? He didn’t know. He couldn’t- But if he didn’t- He sucked in a sharp breath. 

“We- I need help. Mom- Mom left on Friday and hasn’t come back yet and she’s never been gone this long before and I don’t know what to do and Wilbur keeps asking me when she’s coming back but I can’t tell him that I don’t know because then he’ll be really scared and I don’t want him to be scared and- and-” 

Techno was practically hyperventilating.

“Take a deep breath, Technoblade. In and out.”

Techno followed Mr. Sam’s instructions.

“I’m so scared,” he sobbed. 

“It’s ok, Technoblade. You’re ok. Thank you for telling me this. Is it ok if I ask you some questions about it?” Mr. Sam asked gently.

Techno sniffled and nodded.

“You said that your mom has never been gone for this long before. Does she leave you alone a lot?”

Techno frowned.

“Sometimes… Most weekends… But she usually comes back on Monday morning.”

“Ok. Where are Wilbur and Tommy right now?”

“Wilbur’s at school and Tommy’s with our neighbor. She doesn’t like babysitting but said she would watch him today if I really needed, which I did so I could come talk to you.” 

“Ok, Technoblade, so here’s what we’re going to do.”

~~~

When Phil signed up to be a foster parent he had imagined that he would have a child in his home within hours after becoming licensed. He never would have expected that he would still be waiting, jumping to answer every phone call after almost a month. He let out an annoyed sigh as he set his phone back on the table. It had just been another scammer calling about extended car warranties. He leaned back with a groan. He should probably start thinking about what to have for dinner. 

Just as he stood, his phone rang again. The way he lunged for it was admittedly a bit embarrassing, but he was antsy from waiting. 

“Hello?”

It was a social worker. Finally! Phil fell back into the chair and yanked the cap off of his pen to write down information. They were looking for an emergency placement for a sibling group, three brothers, 4th grade, 1st grade, and a toddler. Their mom was “missing” right now. And an address for an office where he was supposed to pick them up. Phil thanked the social worker and hung up. Time to get to work.

He quickly set about making sure the bedrooms upstairs were ready for the boys. He set up the convertible toddler crib/bed in the one room and made sure the nightlights worked and put a stuffed bear in each of the rooms. Once he was satisfied with them, he grabbed a car seat and a booster seat and put them in the back of his car.

~~~

“Techno? Where’s Mom? Why did someone drive us home? Did you get in trouble at school again? Is that why someone took us home? Why are we packing? Are we going on a va-ca-tion?” Wilbur said the word carefully, slowing down his constant stream of questions. “Where are we going? Should I bring my yellow sweater? Are we going to go where Mom is? What is-”

“Wilbur!” Techno snapped as he spun around.

He regretted it almost immediately as Wilbur looked up at him with wide, startled eyes. He took a deep breath and went back to shoving Tommy’s clothes into his backpack. There wasn’t going to be a lot of room left for his things, but that was ok.

“Sorry, just… not right now. Ok, Wilbur? Can you get your stuff to start putting it in your backpack?”

Wilbur nodded and started running around the room grabbing his clothes and toys. Techno double checked that he had everything they needed for Tommy. Once he was sure that he did, he started gathering his things. He couldn’t take much so he took a pair of socks and underwear for each day of the week and a shirt for each day as well. Then he put in a pair of jeans and he was already wearing his shorts so he didn’t need any of those. Techno looked over the bag. It was just about as full as he dared to make it without being in danger of the zipper breaking. Maybe he could fit his books in the bag, he only had two. He bit his lip. He could, right? He pushed them into the top of his backpack. The zipper didn’t close all the way but it was good enough.

He directed his attention to where Wilbur was trying to shove his things into his own backpack.

“Here, let me help,” Techno muttered, grabbing the clothes from Wilbur and folding them neatly. 

Wilbur started trying to shove all five of his stuffies into the bag. Techno pulled them away from him.

“No, Wilbur, you can only take one.”

“No! I need them!” Wilbur whined.

“You can’t take all of them. There’s not enough room.”

Wilbur stopped and stared down at his stuffies, his face scrunched up in thought. He grabbed two of his stuffies, a blue sheep named Friend and a fish named Milo, and held them out to Techno with a bright smile.

“Two!”

Techno shook his head.

“You have to pick one. ”

“No! I need both of them!” 

Wilbur stomped his foot when Techno didn’t give in.

“I hate you!” 

Techno froze. 

“N-no, you- you don’t mean that, Wilbur. Here, give me one. I’ll- I’ll put it in my bag.”

Wilbur held out the fish.

“Go sit with Tommy.”

Wilbur skipped out of the room with a smug grin. Techno unzipped his bag and pulled out his books with shaking hands. Whatever. It didn’t matter. He didn’t need the books. He needed Wilbur to be happy. It was his fault that Wilbur was upset. It was his fault that they had to leave. If he had been able to handle it, Wilbur wouldn’t have had to pick between his stuffies. He put the books back in the drawer and closed it, then put the stuffie in his bag.

“Alright, ready to go?” Mr. Sam asked, poking his head in the room. 

“Yep.”

Chapter Text

Phil pulled into the parking lot and triple checked that he got the address right. He couldn’t help feeling nervous even though he had been waiting anxiously for this. He was ready for his home to not feel empty. He was ready to share his life with these kids. But was he ready to be, basically, their parent? Sure, he took all the classes, but was he really ready?

Phil gave himself a shake. Well, it was too late for that now. He would just have to be the best that he could be. With that he got out of his car and walked into the building.

“Hi, I’m Philza Minecraft. I received a call to pick up the three boys I’m going to foster here.”

The receptionist looked up and nodded towards a row of chairs.

“Have a seat, Mr. Minecraft,” she said to him before picking up the phone and calling someone. “Hi, Mr. Minecraft is here. Ok.”

She hung up the phone and turned back to him.

“Sam will be out shortly.”

True to that, a young man with green hair walked in from the back hallway and smiled at him.

“Mr. Minecraft, wonderful! Please follow me,” he said cheerfully.

Phil followed him down a hallway with motivational posters periodically spaced along the walls and into an office. Inside three kids sat in uncomfortable looking chairs. The oldest had long pink hair and had a blonde toddler in his lap and held onto the hand of a younger boy with curly brown hair. His face was carefully blank but Phil could read the unease in the way he tightened his hold on the toddler and the younger boy’s hand, pulling them closer to himself as they walked in the room. His younger brother was the opposite, smiling brightly as he swung his legs in the chair.

“Technoblade, Tommy, Wilbur, this is Mr. Minecraft. He’s going to be taking care of you for a while,” Sam said, gesturing to each boy as he said their name.

“Hi, you can just call me Phil. It’s nice to meet you,” he said, crouching down to their eye level.

Technoblade immediately dropped his gaze below his chin, but Wilbur waved.

“It’s nice to meet you too, mister!”

Phil signed the paperwork Sam had for him and then led the boys out to his car. Technoblade declined his offer to carry Tommy, clutching the small boy to his chest.

When they got to the car it was the same thing.

“Here, let me help get Tommy into the car seat, mate.”

“I can do it!” Technoblade snapped, but there was a desperate whine in his tone.

“Ok.”

“Wilbur, get in the car seat, please.”

Wilbur nodded and climbed into the car and over Tommy’s car seat to sit in his own.

“Now buckle the seatbelt,” Technoblade prompted, fumbling with the straps as he tried to get Tommy buckled in.

Techno continued to struggle with getting Tommy buckled in, but Phil didn’t offer anymore help, not wanting to push and risk upsetting the boy further.

“Tommy, hold still!”

Finally Tommywas properly strapped in and Technoblade looked back and forth between the car and Phil, seeming uncertain.

“Umm….?”

“You can sit up front with me, mate.”

“Ok…”

Technoblade didn’t seem to really like that idea, but got into the passenger seat anyway. Phil went around to the driver side and started up the car and off they went.

After a few failed attempts at making small talk, Phil stopped trying. Technoblade had turned himself in the seat to flick his eyes back and forth between the backseat, where his brothers were starting to drift off, and Phil. As they pulled up to the house, Technoblade’s gaze switched to looking through the windshield.

“Alright, mate, we’re here,” Phil said cheerfully. “Let’s head inside.”

Technoblade continued to stare at the house before seeming to shake himself out of whatever trance he was in. He turned to look at Phil sheepishly. Phil just smiled and got out of the car and Technoblade followed suit. Technoblade opened the car door and started to try to unbuckle Tommy from his car seat. Phil opened the door on the other side and grabbed Wilbur’s backpack and swung it over one shoulder. Then he reached in to unbuckle Wilbur’s seatbelt and pick the boy up, but was stopped by a sharp noise of protest. He looked up to see Technoblade staring at him with wide eyes full of fear before they narrowed into a glare.

“Mate… I’m just trying to help. I don’t think you can carry both of them.”

Technoblade looked down at Tommy in his arms then back up at Phil and Wilbur.

“I can try,” he said defiantly.

“Do you really want to risk dropping one of them though?”

Phil hated the way fear and shame flashed across the boy’s face at the words, but he needed to convince Technoblade that he needed his help in order for this to work.

“…no,” Technoblade muttered.

That still wasn’t an allowance for Phil to take Wilbur, just an admittance that he didn’t want to risk carrying both of his brothers.

“Do you want me to wake him up?”

Technoblade looked down to the side.

“No,” he huffed.

“There’s not really another option then, mate.”

Technoblade let out a frustrated puff of air.

“Fine.”

Phil scooped up Wilbur and led the way up to the front door with Technoblade’s eyes boring into his back as he followed behind, carrying Tommy. Phil unlocked the door and let the boys in, closing it behind them. Wilbur stirred and opened his eyes.

“Wooowwww…” he whispered in awe. “You have a really nice house, mister.”

Phil chuckled.

“Thanks, mate.”

~~~

Techno did not like this. He did not like this at all. Phil was holding Wilbur and there was nothing he could do to protect him like that. Not that he thought Phil was going to do anything, but he didn’t know him. Techno would never forgive himself if something happened to Wilbur or Tommy because he put them in this situation. So, while Phil seemed nice enough and his house looked like it was from a book he read, Techno wouldn’t let his guard down.

Phil led them upstairs with a promise that they could explore the rest of the house tomorrow. At the top of the stairs, he showed them three bedrooms.

“I have the middle one set up for younger kids, so that one will be Tommy’s and you two can decide which side you each want.”

Techno’s heart sank. Tommy had to be in a different room? That was very far from ideal.

“I get my own room?!” Wilbur asked excitedly.

“N-” Techno started to tell him no but Phil spoke before he could.

“Of course, mate.”

Techno swallowed. It would be so much harder to keep them safe if they were all in separate rooms. He needed to protect them. He… needed to take the bedroom closer to the stairs, so that anyone would have to walk past him to get to his brothers.

“Wilbur, you can have that one,” he said, pointing to the room farthest from the stairs.

“Ok,” Wilbur replied with a sleepy smile.

“Alright, let’s get you boys ready for bed.”

Techno looked up at Phil and shifted nervously. He needed to be the one to do that. He didn’t want Phil to do that to ‘help’ him. He didn’t need help.

“I can do it. Please.”

Phil must have realized that he was practically begging, because he didn’t push at all.

“Ok. I’ll be right here if you need me.”

Techno carefully stepped forward and opened the door to Tommy’s room. It was simple, but well decorated. There was a bed against the one wall that looked like a crib but the front rail was lower and had an opening. Along the same wall was a changing table. Under the window was a dresser and next to it, in the corner, sat a comfortable looking chair. All the furniture was a soft gray color. It was nice, welcoming in a way. Techno almost felt comfortable putting Tommy in there by himself. Almost.

Techno set Tommy down on the changing table and unzipped his backpack. On top of everything was Wilbur’s fish stuffie. He shoved down the wave of emotions that crashed over him and handed it to Wilbur.

“Here you go, Wilbur.”

Wilbur cuddled the plushie close to his chest. Techno carefully pulled out what he needed to change Tommy and a pair of pajamas. Then he changed him, cleaned him up, and put him in his pajamas. Techno hugged the sleeping boy close to his chest and pressed a kiss to the top of his head.

“Goodnight, Tommy. Love you,” he whispered as he laid Tommy down on the bed.

Then Techno picked up his backpack and unloaded the rest of Tommy’s things into the dresser before he left the room, pulling the door shut behind him.

“C’mon, Wilbur, let’s go to bed.”

Techno shifted, unsure, as Phil was still holding Wilbur in his arms. Thankfully, Phil lowered Wilbur to the floor and Techno grabbed his hand and took the backpack. He led Wilbur into his room.

As Techno flicked on the light, his breath caught in his throat. The room was beautiful. There was a nice bed that Wilbur would get to himself, a real desk, a dresser, shelves, a toy box, and a comfy looking bean bag chair. Guilt swirled around in his chest. It was selfish of him to want to have his brothers in the same room with him, to keep Wilbur from getting to enjoy that.

“Techno! Techno, look! A new stuffie!”

Techno turned to see Wilbur bouncing excitedly and pointing at a gray wolf plushie sitting on the bed.

“Do I get to keep it?” Wilbur asked Phil with wide eyes.

“Yep, it’s all yours, mate.”

Wilbur grabbed the plushie and hugged it tight to his chest.

“Yay! Thank you!”

Wilbur held it out and spun around with it.

“Hmmm, I think I’ll call you… L’dog!”

Techno snorted.

“That doesn’t make sense,” he said, shaking his head fondly. “Here, put these on.”

He handed Wilbur a pair of pajamas, everything else already put away in the dresser. Wilbur changed quickly and climbed into bed with Milo, Friend, and L’dog held tightly in his arms.

“Goodnight, Wilbur. Love you,” Techno whispered as he tucked Wilbur in.

“Nigh’, luv ya too,” he murmured, already drifting back to sleep.

Techno turned on the little night light lamp next to the bed and turned to leave the room. Phil was smiling gently at him. He suddenly felt very awkward. He followed Phil out of the room, turning off the light and closing the door behind them. Then it was just him and Phil standing in the hallway.

“Um… I’m alright. You- You can… go. …now.”

“Ok. If you need anything, my room is just downstairs to the left of the stairs. Goodnight Techno.”

Phil turned and walked down the stairs. Techno opened the door to what was supposed to be his room and went in, leaving the door open. Phil must have decorated his bedrooms in themes. Tommy’s room had been simple, but Wilbur’s room had a woodland forest theme to it and, if Techno had to guess, his room had arctic oceans vibes. The furniture and layout was nearly identical to Wilbur’s, except his was in blues and grays instead of greens and browns. On the bed was a polar bear plushie. Maybe he should give it to Wilbur to help make up for the ones he had to leave behind.

Techno put away his things in the dresser, putting his shirts and pair of jeans in one drawer and his underwear and socks in another. He didn’t bring pajamas, so he just slipped his shoes off and tried to lie down on the bed to go to sleep.

He couldn’t though. He felt panicked thinking about Wilbur and Tommy being in a different room and if something were to happen. With a sigh, he got up and grabbed the throw blanket off of his bed. It was dark blue with a design on it in light blue and white and criminally soft. Techno went back out into the hallway and sat against the two-foot section of wall between the doors to Tommy and Wilbur’s rooms, wrapping the blanket around himself.

Thoughts of what Mom might think and how she might feel when she got back home to an empty apartment with her kids gone ran through his mind. A tear slipped down his cheek.

“I’m sorry, Mom. I wasn’t strong enough,” he whispered into the night.

Chapter Text

Phil woke up way earlier than he normally would have, the sun just barely starting to light the sky from its place below the horizon. He rolled onto his back to stare up at the ceiling as he contemplated his brain’s insistence to be awake at the odd hour. It wasn’t like he had gone to bed early, he had actually stayed up rather late researching how to get the kids enrolled in the schools near his house. Maybe it was just the anxiety surrounding the situation? If that was the case, he hoped his brain would find a different way of expressing its worries, he was not a morning person. Although, he didn’t feel too tired either, so maybe- Phil’s eyes widened. The kids! He should go check on the kids and make sure they were ok and breathing and shit. Things were off to a great start.

As he reached the top of the stairs, Phil immediately noticed that something was out of place. A corner of blue fabric spilled into view on the floor. As he turned his body the rest of the way, Phil saw Technoblade wrapped in a blanket and slumped between Tommy and Wilbur’s doors. The boy’s position did not look comfortable at all. Phil’s own back twinged in sympathy. Well, at least he knew one of the boys was still breathing. Whether or not he was ok… did he really expect him to be? Everything had changed suddenly for him last night and he was clearly very anxious about it. Phil looked down at Technoblade with a sad sort of smile and moved around him as best he could to open the door to check on Tommy, trying not to wake him up. 

“Mom?” a sleepy voice muttered.

Phil froze for a second with his hand still on the knob of the half open door. He looked down to see Technoblade similarly frozen, staring up at him with his eyes full of fear. Phil took a step back as the boy’s breathing stuttered into an uneven pattern. Phil panicked for a second before he realized that he probably didn’t remember where he was. Phil imagined that he would be pretty freaked out too, if he woke up to a strange man standing over him. Phil held his hands out in a placating manner but lowered them when the Technoblade flinched away from them. 

“Hey, mate. It’s just me, Phil. Do you remember? We met yesterday and you and your brothers are staying with me for now?” Phil asked softly.

He received a jerky nod in response as Technoblade’s eyes darted between him and the open door to Tommy’s room.

“I was just about to check on your brothers and make sure they’re alright.”

Technoblade’s face twisted and he opened his mouth slightly.

“Would you like to help me?” Phil added quickly, remembering the boy’s insistence on Phil not doing things the night before.

“…k” 

~~~

Techno didn’t fight Phil on him checking on Tommy and Wilbur. He wanted to insist that he was capable of taking care of them himself, but that’s why they were in the situation in the first place, wasn’t it? Because he couldn’t do it all by himself. Yesterday he fought. Yesterday he had felt bold and desperate in the face of the problems of the world, ready to take them on to keep his brothers safe at his side. But today… Today he felt small. So small that those same problems were towering over him, threatening to come crashing down on top of him and crush him under their weight, leaving him unable to protect his brothers from the same fate.

Techno wrapped his arms around himself in a hug as he followed Phil into Tommy’s room. Phil leaned over Tommy’s bed and brushed the hair out of his face. Techno felt his heart squeeze harshly in his chest. He bit his lip and hugged himself tighter. He had no right to be upset at Phil. Not when it was his fault this was their situation. Phil moved on from Tommy, probably because he was still sleeping soundly, and went to Wilbur’s room. Techno trailed behind him like a lost duckling. Wilbur was sprawled out on the bed with the stuffies surrounding him. Techno’s heart twisted at how peaceful he looked. His brothers apparently had no trouble sleeping without him there. They didn’t need him. 

“-noblade?”

Techno jolted as he realized Phil was talking to him.

“Hmm?”

“I was asking if you wanted to help me make breakfast.”

Oh. Yeah, ok. Techno could do that. He knew how to cook.

“Ok.”

Phil smiled at him and gestured for him to follow as he led him down the stairs. 

~~~

About fifteen minutes later, Techno was sitting on a barstool at the kitchen island and growing increasingly annoyed. Phil had asked for his help making breakfast, but he’d barely let him do anything! All he had done was grab things from the fridge. Phil wouldn’t even let him help measure the ingredients, for prime’s sake! As Phil stacked more pancakes onto a plate next to the stove, Techno tapped his fingers against his thigh in irritation. Did Phil not think he could do anything? Because he could! He was more than capable. Even if Phil was one of those adults who thought that kids shouldn’t use knives or the stove, he should let him measure the ingredients and mix the batter at least. With his face twisted in a sour expression, Techno hopped off the stool. 

“I’m going to go get Wilbur and Tommy,” Techno said and slipped up the stairs before Phil could respond.

Techno opened the door to Wilbur’s room. His brother lifted his head slightly as he entered.

“Mmm… Techno?”

Techno smiled slightly.

“Hey Wilbur. It’s time to wake up.”

“But I don’t wanna,” Wilbur groaned, flopping back down on the bed.

“C’mon, Phil made pancakes for breakfast.”

Wilbur’s face lit up.

“...pancakes?”

“Yup.” 

Wilbur got up immediately after that.

“I’m going to get Tommy and we’ll go downstairs.”

Techno turned and left the room. Tommy was easier to get up than Wilbur. Techno changed Tommy quickly and went back downstairs. Wilbur was already seated at the table, chatting cheerfully with Phil while he ate his pancakes and cut fruit. Techno turned his face away at the tight feeling in his chest. There was a highchair with a plate with bite-sized pieces of pancake and fruit on it. Techno placed Tommy down and then sat at his own place. He kept his ear tuned to Wilbur’s tone, to make sure he was still alright, but didn’t listen to anything that was actually being said in the conversation. Wilbur was happy. That was a good thing. He wanted Wilbur to be happy. So why did seeing him happy talking with Phil make him feel bad inside?

“Techno?” 

Wilbur’s voice cut through his thoughts.

“Yes, Wilbur?”

“Phil’s trying to ask you something.”

Techno’s eyes flicked over to Phil, who was looking at him with a curious expression.

“Oh… Sorry, I didn’t hear you.”

“It’s alright, mate,” Phil said casually. “I was just thinking that we should go to the store soon to get some things for you guys and was asking if you’d be ok with going later today.”

“Um… ok…”

~~~

Techno wandered around the boys' clothing section of the department store Phil had taken them to. He felt out of place as a couple of middle aged moms shot him a dirty look. Phil had told them to pick out whatever they liked and wanted and he’d get it for them. Techno didn’t really buy it but, if the man wanted to waste his money like that, he’d take advantage of it to get things for his brothers until it ran out. They had already gotten a ton of stuff for Tommy, but Techno supposed that made sense. They made the toddler stuff so cute that parents wanted to buy a bunch of outfits that their kids would outgrow in 2 months. It made sense that Phil would fall victim to that. Now they were supposed to be getting stuff for him and Wilbur though and Techno needed to be more careful. While he fully intended to take advantage of what he could, he was acutely aware that things could go bad if he pushed it too far. So he was looking around and helping Wilbur pick the right size of the things he liked and then carefully watching Phil as he added the item to the cart. Techno hadn’t gotten anything for himself, he didn’t need anything. He had enough clothes to get him through a week. He didn’t deserve it. It was better for his brothers to be spoiled a bit. 

~~~

Phil held back a sigh. This was not going as well as he thought it would. Tommy was starting to get a bit fussy and Wilbur was bored of looking at clothes and had started grabbing toys and stuffed animals from the next section, making Technoblade run after him every time he darted off, and Phil didn’t think he had seen Technoblade even look at anything for himself. 

Wilbur ran up to him holding out yet another stuffed animal. Technoblade stood behind him looking slightly annoyed at having to go after his brother yet again and watched Phil with the same wary look he had for every item brought to the cart. It was a nice looking stuffed animal and well-made. He reached out and flipped over the price tag.

What the hell?!?!?! Where did these people get off charging that much money for a fucking stuffed animal?!

Something must have changed on his face because Technoblade suddenly tensed and grabbed the stuffed animal from Wilbur’s hands and shoved onto a nearby shelf. Wilbur opened his mouth to protest but Technoblade grabbed his arm and shook his head. Then he dragged him back to the cart as he hissed something in his ear. 

Phil ran a hand through his hair. Damn it. That was not what he wanted to happen. Just because the price was fucking outlandish, didn’t mean that he wasn’t going to get these kids anything they wanted. Ok, he just had to fix this, should be easy enough. He grabbed the stuffed animal and walked back over to the cart where the two boys were still having their hushed argument. 

“Hey, it’s alright. You can get this, Wilbur. I don’t mind.”

Wilbur’s eyes lit up and he reached out to grab the stuffed animal, but was stopped by Technoblade grabbing his wrist. Wide eyes searched Phil’s face and Technoblade muttered something under his breath to Wilbur. 

Giving Wilbur the toy should have fixed it but, instead, everything went to shit. 

Wilbur hissed something back at Technoblade, wrenching his arm out of his grip with tears in his eyes before sprinting into the toy section. Technoblade froze, his hands slowly came up to cover his mouth. His eyes darted back and forth between where Wilbur had run and Phil before he suddenly ran in the opposite direction. Tommy’s interest in the toy Phil had given him had finally worn off causing him to throw it and start screaming. Phil rested his elbows on the cart and dropped his head into his hands.

Chapter Text

Phil ran his hands through his hair. Damn it . It hadn’t even been a full day yet. How had he already messed up this badly? Maybe he wasn’t cut out for this. He’d lost two of the kids and he was pretty sure all three of them were crying and, really, he couldn’t blame them, he wanted to start crying too at this point. But he couldn’t, because he was supposed to be the responsible adult here. 

He picked up Tommy out of the cart with a heavy sigh and started trying to comfort him. A mom walking by gave him a sympathetic look. It took ten minutes and three different toys to console, or distract, the screaming toddler. With Tommy finally content, Phil’s brain was free to panic over the fact that he didn’t know where the other two boys were. It didn’t help that they had gone in separate directions, leaving him to decide which one to go find first. 

Wilbur would probably be the easiest to find and was the younger of the two, so Phil made his way through the toy section. Thankfully it wasn’t long before he found the boy sitting on the floor, playing with various stuffed animals. 

“Wilbur, mate, please don’t run off like that again,” he said urgently. 

Wilbur turned to look up at him.

“Can I get these too, Phil?” he asked, batting his lashes.

Phil really didn’t think that would send the right message here. …but he didn’t want to have to fight with Wilbur. 

“Ok, you can get them, Wilbur, if you stay with us for the rest of the trip and don’t run off again, ok? Can you do that?”

Wilbur’s eyes went wide and he nodded vigorously.

“Yes!”

Wilbur quickly gathered the toys into the cart. 

“Alright, let’s go find your brother.”

Wilbur looked around, seeming to just then realize that Technoblade wasn’t there. Phil walked in the direction Technoblade had run in. He considered his options. It would probably be easier to look for him without the cart, but he didn’t want to just leave it in the way. He changed his course and went to the customer service desk at the front of the store.

“Hello, how can I help you?” the young woman behind the desk asked.

Phil hesitated for a second, trying to figure out a better way to say ‘hey I lost one of the kids I’m responsible for because he ran off because I am unqualified to be a parental figure.’

“Hi, I got separated from one of my kids and was wondering if it’d be alright if I left my cart here while I looked for him?”

“Oh, of course, sir. I can just make an announcement for him to come to this desk if you give me his name.”

“Um, he’s upset so I don’t know if that’ll work… so I’d still like to look for him but could you do that and then call for me if he does come here?”

“Uh, yeah, that should be fine.”

“Thank you. His name is Technoblade and my name is Phil.”

The woman nodded and picked up the phone.

“Attention: Technoblade. Technoblade, please come to the customer service desk under the red sign at the front of the store. Your family is looking for you.” 

“Thanks, mate,” Phil said again as he walked away with Tommy and Wilbur in tow.

~~~

Techno pushed himself behind a rack of men’s pants as the pressure behind his eyes became too much and tears began to spill over his cheeks. 

Why couldn’t Wilbur understand that he was just trying to protect them? 

A pair of feet walked past and he drew his knees in closer and pressed a hand over his mouth to keep any sounds from escaping. Thankfully, they kept walking, either they didn’t notice or they ignored him. He choked back the beginning of a sob.

Why did everything he did make Wilbur hate him?

Why wasn’t he strong enough to protect his brothers without taking things away from them?

Why wasn’t he good enough? 

Why did he ruin everything?

A voice over the store’s intercom system startled him out of his thoughts.

“Attention: Technoblade. Technoblade, please come to the customer service desk under the red sign at the front of the store. Your family is looking for you.” 

Great.

He squeezed his eyes shut to try to keep any more tears from escaping and swiped his hands underneath his eyes. He needed to stop crying. Big kids didn’t cry. He took a deep breath and wiped the snot from his face on his shoulder, trying to ignore how gross that was. He needed to pull himself together. He grit his teeth and scrubbed aggressively at his eyes. Big kids. Don’t. Cry.  

When he opened his eyes again, there were two pairs of feet coming towards him. He held his breath, hoping they would go away, before realizing that he recognized those worn out sneakers. A hand reached in and gently parted the pairs of pants to expose his hiding place. Techno looked up at Phil crouched in front of him, wearing a tired smile.

“There you are, mate. I’m glad we were able to find you. I was kind of worried.”

Phil looked frazzled and considerably less put together than when they arrived at the store.

“Mate?” Phil asked with concern when he didn’t respond.

Techno struggled to breathe as guilt and shame slammed into him and lit his insides on fire at the same time that panic and dread formed an icy pool in his stomach, as he processed what had happened.

He had just run away. He hadn’t thought about the consequences. Wilbur had run off in the store and he’d left him. He’d left Tommy alone with Phil. Anything could have happened to them and there would have been nothing Techno could have done to protect them because he ran away like a selfish coward just because Wilbur said something a little bit mean. And then he had made Phil take care of them, search for him in the store while he hid, and ask the workers to make an announcement which didn’t even work because he couldn’t get himself together quick enough. If Phil wasn’t annoyed with them before, Techno’s behavior would make sure he was now. 

“I’m sorry,” he choked out, his throat still tight with emotion.

“It’s ok,” Phil said with that tired smile again.

It was different from the other smile he had been using. This one was smaller and more strained. That meant it wasn’t ok. Phil leaned back and stood, groaning as his knees popped. Techno threw that on top of the growing pile of inconveniences he had caused the man and followed him.

Phil led them back up to the front of the store to get their cart. Tommy was falling asleep against his shoulder as they walked. Techno wanted to ask if he could hold him, but the shame still licking at his rib cage like a flame kept him silent. Wilbur was ignoring him and kept his face firmly turned away.

In spite of the people around him, Techno felt terribly alone. The woman at the front desk smiled at them when they retrieved the cart and Phil thanked her. 

“Techno?” Phil asked.

He sounded tired too.

“Can we look at getting some clothes for you, mate? Please?”

Techno wrapped his arms around himself, Phil’s near begging tone making the guilt worse. He nodded.

“Ok.”

Phil led them back to the boys clothing section. Techno followed behind numbly. After seemingly realizing that he wasn’t going to just pick clothes off of the rack himself, Phil started to look for stuff for him.

“I wanna sit in the cart too,” Wilbur whined.

“Wil-” Techno started to hush him.

“I’m asking Phil.”

Wilbur so obviously shut him down and Techno flinched back. Phil ran a hand through his hair.

“Yes, Wilbur, you can sit in the cart.”

He lifted Wilbur up to put him in the cart and Techno shoved all his feelings about that deep down in his stomach. He didn’t have the right to feel that way after how he’d acted. Phil turned to him and held up two shirts.

“Which one do you like better, mate? If you hate both or want both, just tell me, but I thought this might be easier.”

Techno reached forward to look at the price tag on each of them, but Phil stopped his hand.

“No, mate,” he said gently. “Which one do you like better?”

Techno hesitated and looked at the shirts. One had a graphic with dogs on a black shirt and the other one was plain gray. Shirts with designs on them probably cost more, right? So he just needed to pick the plain ones. He pointed to the gray shirt and Phil smiled, so he must have made the right choice. They continued to do the same thing for far too many clothes in Techno’s opinion before finally leaving to checkout. Techno cringed as every item was rung up, watching the number on the screen tick higher and higher. That was… a lot of money. Too much money.

Chapter Text

Phil sighed as he loaded the last of the bags into the trunk of his car. It could have gone a lot worse, he supposed. At least they actually accomplished what they had gone there for, each of the kids were leaving with a new pair of shoes, 2 pairs of pajamas, and a somewhat decent amount of clothes, and they had made it out without anyone getting physically hurt. 

Phil closed the trunk and turned back to the kids. He was surprised that Technoblade hadn’t started to try to get Tommy out of the cart and into the car seat. Maybe it was too difficult to take him out of the cart at his height.

“Technoblade? Would you like my help putting Tommy in his car seat?”

Technoblade just shrugged and kept his eyes focused on the ground. Was he embarrassed to need his help? Phil opened the car door and picked up Tommy out of the cart. Alarm bells rang in his head when Technoblade just turned away, his shoulders bunching up by his ears. 

Phil got everyone in the car and returned the cart. He got back in the car and was met with sullen silence. Ok, it definitely could have gone better, but maybe he could salvage the trip, if just a bit. 

“Are you kids hungry?” he asked.

“Ok!” Wilbur said with a smile. 

Technoblade didn’t respond and Tommy was still kind of asleep.

Good enough.

~~~

Phil walked into the McDonald’s and led the boys up to the counter with Tommy in his arms.

“Hi, can I get a cheeseburger meal and a happy meal with nuggets and…” he trailed off and turned to Wilbur.

“Ooh! I want one too!” he exclaimed, bouncing on his toes.

“Ok. Technoblade?” 

The boy looked extremely anxious, his eyes flicking rapidly around the menu. 

“Do you want to get a happy meal too, mate?”

“I don’t- I don’t know. I haven’t had one,” he whispered.

“Hey, it’s ok. Let’s do a happy meal then, ok? Would you rather have a hamburger or chicken nuggets?”

“Um… a hamburger?”

Phil nodded.

“Ok. How about you and Wilbur go pick a table for us to sit at while I finish ordering?”

Technoblade gave a shaky nod and turned to Wilbur who took off in search of the perfect spot.

Phil paid for their food and grabbed a high chair for Tommy. When he brought it over to the table, Technoblade was frowning hard, his eyes staring desperately at Wilbur, with his hand rested on the space next to him.

“I want to sit next to Phil,” Wilbur said stubbornly and slid into the booth opposite Technoblade. “Phil, sit next to me.”

“Ok, mate. Just a second.”

Phil got Tommy situated in the chair and then went to grab their food. When he came back, he sat down next to Wilbur and got everyone set up with their food. He had to remind Wilbur to eat because he got distracted by the toy. 

Technoblade opened his toy and pushed it across the table to Wilbur, watching him carefully. Wilbur picked up the toy and started to play with it happily. Technoblade relaxed somewhat, the corner of his lips quirking up just slightly. 

“Wil…” he whispered.

When Wilbur didn’t so much as look up at him, even after accepting his offered toy that Phil guessed was supposed to be an apology, Technoblade’s mood crashed. His face pinched a bit into a look of devastation and he retreated into himself completely, turning towards the window and kind of numbly picking at his food. Phil wondered if he was supposed to intervene here, have the boys talk it out or something, but it seemed like he’d probably just make it worse.

~~~

When they got back to the house, Technoblade just kind of hovered awkwardly while Phil put Tommy in his bed and put the new clothes in the wash and turned on some cartoons for Wilbur in the living room. He moved forward to sit on the couch with Wilbur before stopping himself and shifting uncomfortably. Eventually, he turned and slowly made his way up the stairs.

~~~

Techno blinked awake to the empty darkness of his room. He rolled over onto his other side and then sat up in alarm. There was no one in the bed next to him. Where was Wilbur? He scrambled to get out of the bed, his heart clenching in panic, and fell to the floor, his foot tangled in the blankets. He grabbed at them and yanked, trying to free himself, but paused when he felt how soft they were. Right. This was Phil’s house. Wilbur had his own room here. Calm down. 

Techno took the time to slow his breathing and gently remove the blankets from around his leg. He was fine. His brothers were fine. They were just in other rooms. Everything was fine. Except he didn’t know where Mom was. Except Mom was going to be upset with him. Except he didn’t trust Phil. Except Wilbur was mad at him. 

He stood up and walked carefully over to his door and opened it. A pile of neatly folded laundry sat outside. He vaguely remembered telling Phil to go away last night when he asked if he wanted him to come in. The wording had been weird, it was Phil’s house, so of course he could go wherever he wanted, but he had asked if Techno wanted him to come in. Techno stepped around the laundry, he’d put it away later, and quietly opened Tommy’s door.

Inside was lit by the little night light pointed at the floor so that it wouldn’t keep Tommy awake but would keep you from tripping. Techno breathed a sigh of relief when he saw Tommy’s little chest moving up and down with his breathing as he slept. See, he’s just fine.

He allowed himself a moment to adjust the thin blankets around Tommy, lightweight so he wouldn’t overheat in the summer temperatures, before leaving the room and heading to Wilbur’s room.

Wilbur’s empty room. Techno flicked on the lights, searching the room desperately. 

“ Wilbur ,” he hissed. “Come on. This- This isn’t funny.”

He lifted up the blankets and checked under the bed and in the closet and behind the door. Techno stood in the middle of the room breathing heavily, or maybe not breathing at all, he wasn’t really sure.

Maybe he was in the bathroom. He ran to check, but a thorough search showed he wasn’t there.

Maybe he went to Techno’s room while he was checking on Tommy. But his room was just as empty. As was the extra room on the other side of the hall. And the closet at the end next to the stairs. 

Wilbur wasn’t there. Panic started to really choke Techno. His little brother was missing. He was supposed to take care of him. That was his job and he’d failed. 

Blood rushing in his ears, Techno stumbled down the stairs. All the lights were off downstairs, but Techno went through the rooms calling Wilbur’s name just to make sure. He wasn’t in any of them either. Techno stopped at Phil’s doorway. The door was cracked but not all the way open. Techno raised a shaking hand to knock on the door. Please don’t be mad at getting woken up, he begged silently.

“Ph- Phil? Phil?!”

He bit his lip to try to keep the tears burning his eyes from spilling over. 

Phil opened his door all the way, flicking on his light with a confused look on his face. That quickly changed to concern though, when he saw Techno standing in front of him. He crouched down a bit to be level with his face.

“Mate? What’s wrong?”

Techno took a deep breath and a sob forced its way out of his throat. Phil cooed and reached forward to comfort him. Techno shook his head and pushed his hands away. He didn’t need- didn’t deserve -comfort. He needed to find Wilbur. That’s what Phil should be focused on.

“Wil- Wilbur’s missing. He’s not in his room. And I- I’ve checked every- everywhere. And I can’t find him.”

“Woah, hey, mate. It’s ok,” Phil said gently.

Techno shook his head, angry and confused. No, it wasn’t ok. His brother was missing.

“I’ll help you look for him.”

They searched the house together and eventually found him playing with the happy meal toys in the laundry room sink. 

Techno rushed forward and pulled him close to his chest, sobbing.

“Don’t do that, Wilbur!” he scolded through tears. “You’re supposed to be in your room.”

“…sorry. I just wanted to play.”

~~~

Phil stood back and watched, relief filling his own chest. After a while he led the kids back upstairs and helped Technoblade gather blankets and pillows so that he and Wilbur could sleep on the floor of Tommy’s room at Technoblade’s insistence. Technoblade never let up his firm grip on Wilbur’s hand, even as they laid down. Phil made sure they were situated and then turned off the light and closed the door. He ran his hand down his face and sighed. He wanted to be optimistic, but if today was supposed to be any indication of what was to come… he didn’t know if he was cut out for it.

Chapter Text

Techno spent most of the next day playing with Wilbur and Tommy in the living room. It wasn’t until after they had eaten dinner that he felt that he could let his brothers out of his sight for more than five minutes without falling into a panic. Tommy had been put to bed and he was watching some silly cartoon with Wilbur before they went to bed as well. It almost… felt normal. As he watched the brightly colored characters run across the screen, he wasn’t really following the plot. Instead millions of thoughts were running through his head and somewhere in that was the thought that it was Sunday night and he’d normally be trying to help Wilbur with his homework so his teacher wouldn’t be disappointed with him. 

Techno chewed on the inside of his cheek. Were they going to school the next day? Phil’s house was on the other side of town. Would they change schools then? Was that even worth it? Would Wilbur’s teacher be worried if he didn’t come? Would Mom think to ask the school where they had gone when she got back?

Techno stood with a huff. There was no point in him guessing endlessly. He’d never get answers like that. What he could do though, was go and try to ask Phil. At least then he’d know what the man had planned for the next day, even if he got nothing else.

“I’ll be right back,” he muttered to Wilbur, who just hummed without looking away from the tv.

He padded over into the kitchen. Phil was doing something at the counter with his back towards him. Techno twisted his fingers and rocked back and forth on his feet before gathering the courage to ask.

“Hey, Phil?”

“Yeah, mate?” 

Phil turned around to face him with a wine glass in his hand. Techno froze, his eyes locked on the glass for a moment before they shot rapidly between Phil’s face, the glass, and the bottle on the counter.

“Mate?” Phil asked, stepping forward slightly.

“Nevermind!” Techno blurted out.

He spun around on his heel and headed back into the living room.

“C’mon Wilbur, time for bed,” he said with forced cheer as he grabbed the remote to turn off the tv. 

“But-” Wilbur started.

“Ah! No buts, upstairs with you.”

“No fair! I-”

Techno’s voice dropped.

“Upstairs. Now.”

Wilbur’s eyes widened slightly and he nodded and moved to obey. Techno didn’t think Wilbur understood any of it, but he knew enough to recognize when Techno was really serious and he shouldn’t argue anymore.

Techno helped Wilbur get ready for bed and tucked him in before kissing his forehead and instructing him not to get out of bed until Techno woke him up in the morning. Then he checked on Tommy and made sure their doors were shut tight before he sat down on his own bed. He tucked his knees up under his chin and listened for any sounds from downstairs. He hoped that Phil would fall asleep soon. He sat like that for a while, willing for Phil to just go to bed without incident. Unfortunately, like everything else in his life, Techno didn’t get what he wished for. Footsteps creaked up the stairs and Techno slipped out of his room.

~~~

Phil sat down at the kitchen island with a heavy sigh. He just kept fucking it up, didn’t he? He dropped his head into his hands. After a bit of sitting like that, contemplating his life choices and failures, Phil decided to go upstairs to check on the boys before going to bed himself. He climbed the stairs and turned to find Technoblade standing in the hallway. He looked tense.

“Hey, mate,” Phil said, stepping forward.

Technoblade moved to block his path more fully. Phil paused. Something was wrong. He was missing something here.

“Technoblade?”

“Stay… Stay away from them,” Technoblade said, breathing heavily.

“Technoblade? What’s wrong?” he asked as he stepped forward and reached out towards the boy.

Technoblade’s feet stuttered in place, like he was torn between stepping back and standing his ground, and his voice shook as he spoke.

“B- Back up.”

Phil stepped back and held his hands up in surrender.

“Ok. What if I sit over here?” he asked, lowering himself down to sit on the top of the stairs. “Is that ok? Can we talk about it?”

Technoblade gave a stiff nod and crossed his arms tightly in front of his chest.

“Ok. What’s going on, mate?”

“Don’t- Don’t come by them.”

“Alright, message received. Can I ask why that is?”

Technoblade just tightened his arms and dropped his gaze from Phil’s face to somewhere on his chest. Phil went through the day, trying to think of anything that was majorly different or at which point Technoblade started acting- oh. He was dumb.

“Technoblade, is this about the wine?” Phil asked softly. “Does it bother you that I was drinking it?”

Technoblade shifted awkwardly, still avoiding meeting his eyes.

“Mom…” he started, before closing his mouth with a shake of his head and trying again. “Sometimes, Mom has friends over instead of leaving home to go see them and they drink it. It…”

Technoblade trailed off, tightening his crossed arms across his chest even more. He inhaled sharply before continuing.

“It makes them act… weird. I don’t like it and Wilbur and Tommy shouldn’t have to see it. I won’t let them. They shouldn’t have to-” Technoblade cut himself off suddenly, his face pinched up and his breathing a bit faster than it was before.

Well, that was… concerning. Whatever, don’t get caught up on that, focus on the ‘now’ problem.

“Thank you for telling me, I didn’t know it bothered you. I can promise you that I will never hurt you or your brothers. I don’t act ‘weird’ like that. Ever.”

Phil wasn’t entirely sure what weird entailed here but he was certain he would not create such an unpleasant experience as Technoblade seemed to be thinking of.

Technoblade seemed hesitant.

“I also promise that I won’t drink it anymore while you are staying with me. Does that help?”

Technoblade shuffled his feet. 

“You don’t get mean when you drink it?”

Phil shook his head.

“Promise.”

Technoblade bit the inside of his cheek, mulling something over in his thoughts.

“Then… I- I guess you can drink it sometimes. If you want to,” he said nervously.

“But I won’t, because it bothers you,” Phil said gently.

Technoblade’s eyes widened a bit in surprise before his brow furrowed and he looked at him like he was a particularly difficult math problem.

“I… ok. Can… Can you go… um, go downstairs? And stay there?” Technoblade asked uncertainly. “I believe you, I do! But… I just… I need… I can’t…”

Technoblade’s breathing started to grow fast and shaky again.

“You’re ok, Technoblade. I’ll leave if that will help you feel safer right now.”

Technoblade’s head jerked in a nod and Phil slipped back down the stairs. It hurt to leave the boy suffering like that, but he realized that his presence was only making things worse.

~~~

Techno waited until Phil reached the bottom of the stairs and then dropped to his knees. It didn’t make sense. None of it made sense. Phil had said he was going to stop just because he saw that it bothered him? He had asked Mom to stop several times and she had only gotten mad at him. She wouldn’t even stop having the friends that got really mean over when he told her how much they scared him. 

He pressed his face into his hands as tears started to slip out of his eyes. Stop it. He was being ungrateful. Mom had taken care of them. She said she loved him. No! She loved him. He needed to stop. He shouldn’t cry about things she did or didn’t do. 

Techno bent forward until his forehead touched the floor. Mom cared about him and Wilbur and Tommy. Even if it wasn’t fair that he had to take care of them instead of- stop it. He did his best to muffle a sob. Stop! What was wrong with him?! He was a big kid, he wasn’t supposed to cry. He wasn’t supposed to think bad things about Mom. Mom would be mad at him for crying, especially so loudly, he could wake his brothers. 

Techno stood quickly on shaky legs and hurried into his room- no, the room he was staying in -to grab a pillow to help muffle another sob. He collapsed against his- the bed. He couldn’t breathe but he shoved his face further into the pillow as his shoulders shook with the sobs.