Chapter Text
Los Angeles was beginning to give up the humid evening for the cool night. Although the car horns were still honking, it was clear that a calm had descended. At least outside.
Sasha didn't think calm would descend inside.
Even if she was at school when it started, she was sure that the big fight that reached upstairs had been going on all morning. And they never stopped. Sasha had never seen them fight so big and long before. Their shouting was occasionally interrupted by the sound of clattering and scolding, which frightened the little girl very much. She tried to cover her ears with her tiny hands, but she knew she couldn't block out the sound.
"I didn't ask for any of this."
"This coming from you? After all you've done? You're nothing but an asshole who only cares about his money."
"I don't want to hear that from the bitch who drinks herself to death. What are we gonna do with the brat?"
"I don't know what to do, do I look like a staff member?"
"Well, I certainly won't. I can't make another mistake. I already did 8 years ago."
She bit her lip. She was a quick-witted girl for her age. She managed to connect the dots. With trembling hands, she opened the door to her room and headed for the stairs. Her body felt heavy with every step. When her vision blurred, she brought her arm up and wiped her eyes hard. They were shouting louder than she thought.
"Nicholas, act like a father for once."
"Look who's talking! Was it me who gave that spoiled brat a beer instead of one of those lousy juices?"
"Who the hell are you to question my decisions like that? I don't give a shit about all the money or checks you pulled out of your ass, Waybright! I put up with that little twit for years. It'll be settled on paper and you'll come and get her like a lamb. End of—"
"Am I a mistake?"
Katherina and Nicholas Waybright were startled and turned to the side at the same time. Sasha, trying to make her tiny body look big, was standing a few feet away, her deep blue eyes were full like beads and red. But their gaze was so sharp that if you didn't see the owner, you wouldn't know it belonged to a child. It was impossible not to hear the tremor in her voice. The two of them were ignoring it.
"Am I just a mistake for you?"
"We heard you, kid."
They were clearly not even bothering to communicate with the child. She clenched her fists.
"Answer me then!"
"Know your place!"
The little girl covered her face with her hands when the glass goblet her father had been holding during the fight shattered on the wall.
"I don't take orders from anyone, especially not from someone like you. I don't care anymore which nook and cranny you hide in with your tail between your legs like a dog. I don't give a fuck!"
And he left. Just like that.
Her mother's eyes hung on the outer door for a while. Then she turned to her with an iron gaze. It was so cold that she had to bite her lips until they bled so that no sobs escaped.
"Pack your stuff. I need to find a lawyer. And I think I know someone who knows."
Neither of them said a word in the car. Sasha was silently trying to stop her shaking hands.
Weak. You're a freak and weak. Get your shit together!
She shook her head slightly and pressed her nails hard against her palm. Her hands hurt a lot, but she shouldn't have cared, right? After all, her father didn't care either. So that's how it worked. It wasn't that bad, either. She couldn't dream when it hurt. She couldn't sleep. It was just the landscape and her. Maybe if she pressed a little more—
When the car shook, she turned to her mother.
Her head was leaning against the steering wheel. Was she asleep? At a moment like this?
"Mom, what are you doing? We're in the car!"
When it started to accelerate, she turned in front of her in fear. Everything was a blur. She buckled her seat belt, grabbed the phone from her mother's purse and pressed it to her chest.
It was one of dozens of accidents in California that evening. The car crashed into a sign reading "45 Zone Ahead" and a small child's scream was heard.
Although it was Sasha's idea for a sleepover, she wasn't with Anne and Marcy, who were giggling while making cookies.
They had told Anne's mother to get Sasha to come too, but when Oum called, she couldn't reach Katherina. The children were upset at first. Sasha hadn't come to school all week. A whole week. So they were worried. And when she finally came yesterday, she had said only one thing all morning:
"Family matters, right?"
At lunch she was a little more cheerful. She was happy playing hopscotch and drawing pictures. Until...
"Why are you making the horse blue?" she asked Anne. "Aren't horses brown?"
"They can be black, red and white too. Not to mention the shades." Marcy added in a cheerful voice as she drew the green fairy girl.
"I imagine it. Like it's happening. Like a game."
"Huh..."
"Hello, it's called art dude! Don't you ever do that?"
Sasha put the pink crayon on the flower picture she had drawn herself and turned her friends. She shrugged her shoulders.
"I can make music out of my mom's glass rum bottles. Does that count?"
"What's rum?"
"It's a kind of drink."
"Have you ever had one of those before?" Marcy was looking at her with wide-open eyes. "I asked at Christmas time, but my mom said I was too young. How did they give you permission?"
"I didn't have to ask. My mom falls asleep whenever she drinks too much of it."
"I've always wondered how it tastes." the Taiwanese girl had began to whisper, aware of the gravity of what they were talking about. Sasha had lowered her voice too.
"So bitter. And strange. It's like tea, you get hot when you drink it. After I finished one cup, I started to feel dizzy. And then I threw up."
"Ew!" Anne reflexively stepped back. "I don't even put that stuff in my mouth."
"Yeah, that'd be good. Mom always says it's comforting, but I don't think so."
The conversation flew out of both girls' minds as they turned the dough in their tiny palms in front of the tray.
"Do you think it'll cook if we take a big piece and make Domino?" Marcy asked with glowing eyes as she placed the puzzle-piece-shaped cookies on the tray. Anne giggled.
"We can chase Domino whenever we want. But we could make little cats."
"Or tiny frogs!"
"Ew, not frogs!"
"Eh, but why?"
"They don't look so cute with their squinty eyes. But it could be a squirrel."
"Squirrel, squirrel!"
The laughter of the two girls filled the house, interrupted by Mrs. Boonchuy, holding the phone to her ear, calling out a familiar name.
"Sasha, is that you? Anne and Marcy are here, if you want to talk to them— hey hey, sweetie, I don't quite understand you, can you speak more calmly? Wait, your mom's car!? Where? Okay sweetie, just calm down. Did you call an ambulance?"
Bee, who was playing on the sofa in the living room, got up and came to his wife with worried eyes. Marcy clutched Anne's dress with trembling hands.
"Something's happened."
Anne nodded, snuggling up to Marcy with trembling hands that were no better than the other.
"Okay, honey, we'll be right there. Don't hang up the phone, okay? I want to stay in touch with you. Check on your mom and let me know if her breathing changes."
She covered the phone with her hand and turned to her husband who had taken the car keys.
"Call the ambulance, Bee."
"She didn't call? That was the first thing she had to do."
"I know." Oum put vests on the girls and took them by the hand and ran to the door. "I don't think she can think of anything other than pressing the top number in a panic." They took the car out of the garage.
"Mom, what's going on? Is Sasha okay?"
Oum was putting the girls' seat belts on while Bee drove the car at full speed and kept talking to health worker. She was startled and looked at the children. Their eyes were full of tears and they hugged each other. Oh, they must be so scared.
"She's okay, sweetie. We're going to her now. Her mom wasn't feeling well."
"Is it the rum again?"
"Marcy!"
"What? Didn't Sasha say it made drinker feel bad? Isn't that why you said you'd never– Oh... Oh. Ups! Sorry, my bad."
Forgetting that what they were talking about was supposed to stay between them, Marcy turned crimson and started fiddling with her belt. Oum frowned.
"What are you talking about, girls? Is there something I need to know?"
"Umm..." When Anne realized there was no escape, she looked into her mother's eyes in defeat. The thought of Sasha overhearing them on her mother's phone gave her a sick feeling in her stomach. "Marcy was talking yesterday about how she was too young to drink it on Christmas. And Sasha mentioned that her mother fell asleep every night after drinking it. That's all."
"Later, girls. Stay in the car." Bee had stopped the engine. They had arrived. And outside was...
Anne and Marcy took a breath in sync.
Miraculously there was no traffic. One of the huge signs was lying on the ground. And a convertible was standing in the middle of the road with its front smashed. With a terrified girl on the side.
"Sasha!"
The little girl's eyes widened when she saw Oum. She was not crying. Her tiny hand was under her mother's nose to check her breathing as she put her head in her lap. Bee leaned her against the car and Oum checked her pulse. It was slow. But it was there. Her head was bleeding. She must have been hit in the accident. It was not good that she was unconscious. She turned to the little girl who was trying to act incredibly calm for her age.
"What happened sweetie?"
Yet her shaky voice and trembling body gave her away. At the same time, there was an anger in her movements.
"We had left the house to talk to a lawyer she knew. She fell asleep while driving. That's what happens when she drink too much of that stuff! I don't know how she endure that bitter taste."
Oum's heart hurts. It's more than Anne said.
"Did you call your dad, honey?"
"He doesn't care. He said. He's gone. I don't know if he'll be back."
Bee and Oum looked at each other. They knew that the Waybrights' family situation was not very healthy. But they didn't know it had gotten this bad, either. Oum squatted next to the little girl.
"Oh, sweetie... I can't imagine what you've been through. You've done very well. Come, Anne and Marcy are waiting for you."
Oum picked her up and took her to the car. Her body was cold. She's gonna get sick. As she sat her down with the others, she took off her waistcoat and put it over Sasha. As soon as she closed the door, two girls jumped on their friend.
"Are you okay? Are you hurt?"
Anne carefully examined her arms and face. She seemed to be unhurt. She had a mark on her stomach because the belt had been tightened during the accident, but it wasn't important that much.
"We were making cookies at home. You'll feel better when we leave. I'm sure your mom's fine. You know, there's a rumor that doctors have magic powers. Some people say— Sash?"
After a day like that, even she couldn't help herself when she saw such attention between two of her favorite people. She buried her face between their bodies and shook with sobs. All the stress, sadness, anger, undesirability that she had swallowed inside came out as tears.
The two girls looked at each other, then pulled the third to them and kissed her on the head, trying to fill the emptiness inside her.