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“You’re a freak , Lily.”
Severus looked up from his book with a frown. No one usually comes near the tree he was claiming as his spot. It was an out-of-the-way old tree with bushes hiding the spot he was sitting on. It was a nice spot to have some quiet time to read, or to just hide and be alone for a while. The river in front of the tree even provides a nice view, if you could ignore the murky water soiled by industrial waste from the factory district just next door. The point is, no one usually comes here besides Severus, especially not two nice-looking girls from the good part of Cokeworth.
“I’m not a freak!” cried one of the girls, the younger one, it seemed. She was holding out her hand with the palm up, long red hair flowing down her back. They both have the same red hair, Severus noticed, though the other girl’s hair was way shorter and curlier. Must be sisters.
“It was just a flower, Tuney,” she said, her voice trembling like she was holding back tears.
“Flowers stay dead when they’re dead, Lily! And they definitely don’t float on their own!”
“I’m just trying to make it look pretty for you,” the younger girl faltered, ”you liked pretty flowers.”
“Not if you did your freakish things with it. Stay away from me, I’m telling mummy,” the older girl stomped away, back to their nice house, Severus assumed.
The little girl slumped after her sister left. Crouching down and putting her face in her hands, sobbing. Severus was a little bit annoyed at the interruption. He was hoping to gain some quiet time for himself before going home. Instead, he was disturbed by two little girls having some stupid sibling squabbles. Though Severus couldn’t help but be intrigued by their fight. Didn’t the older girl just say that the younger one was reviving and floating dead flowers? And she called her a freak. Could it be that this girl was magic?
Well, only one way to find out, Severus thought.
“I don’t think you’re a freak,” said Severus after he stood up from his spot. The girl was startled and jumped up at his voice. She rubbed her teary eyes and then squinted at him.
“Who are you?” asked the girl.
“I’m Severus,” he said, taking a step towards her only to stop when she stepped back at his approach. Severus frowned. He wasn’t trying to scare her, he just wanted to know what she did and if it was magic. “Did you really make a flower float?” he asked.
“Why? Are you going to call me a freak, too?”
“No!” Severus blurted out, “of course not. Just…” Severus didn’t really know how to ask her without sounding like he was accusing her of something bad. Maybe he should show her that it wasn’t really a freakish thing and that Severus could do it too?
Severus looked around to find a dead flower that wasn’t already crumpled and dirty. There was one daffodil just in front of his shoes. Maybe he could start with this one. Severus tried to aim his focus on the flower and command it to raise to his hand. The flower slowly, very slowly, raised up to his hand, and Severus proceeded to command it to float toward the girl. Severus tried to add a few twirls along the way that only ended up with the flower being slightly wobbly.
She extended her hands to catch the flower, and it dropped gently on her palm. Her wide eyes turned back to Severus, mouth slightly gaping in disbelief before turning into a wide grin.
“I’m Lily.”
***
They frequently met at Severus’ spot after that, to the point that Severus started to think of the place as their spot. He stopped hoping for some peace and quiet on his own, and instead always wondered if Lily would come today or not.
She didn’t actually come every day, of course. It seemed that even after their fight, Lily still liked to spend time with her sister, Petunia. Or at least when she wasn’t calling her a freak. Lily admitted that she kept her freakishness, no, her magic as little as possible when she was with Petunia.
Severus didn’t like the sound of that. It sounded far too similar to his Mum hiding her magic from Dad, and getting yelled at or beaten every time Dad found one of her magical things laying around. So Severus tried to talk and show magic as much as possible when he was with Lily, just like how Mum tried to sneak him books to read or show him how to brew potions when Dad wasn’t home.
One thing that Severus was really glad of was that they were the same age, and that means they were going to Hogwarts together. Granted, Lily was a bit sceptical when he told her about Hogwarts. She was supposed to go to the secondary school just next town after primary, she said. Her parents told her so, and Petunia was already going there this year.
“Yes, but your sister is just a muggle, and you’re a witch, Lily,” Severus reminded her every time she doubted his words about the magical world and how she was going there with him. And she was definitely going to Hogwarts with Severus, even if he had to drag her fighting and kicking.
She was a powerful witch, Severus could tell, probably even more than him. Mum told him stories about powerful witches and wizards who were able to wield magic as if magic existed just to obey their wishes. Severus remembered when she showed him what exactly she did on their first meeting, and Severus was amazed by her magic. She did not only float the flowers like Severus did, no, she revived the flower, making it bloom again and glowing with life when it was supposed to have already withered away. She could even float herself, jumping off the swing at the park and floating for a few seconds in the air before landing gently on the ground. And all that without even knowing anything about magic.
But all the magic she showed him didn’t prepare him for this moment.
They were laying down at their spot after wandering around the neighbourhood for a while. Severus was telling her about the numbing potion he was brewing with his Mum the other day when she suddenly sat up and looked to the bushes on her side away from Severus. She shifted to her knees and grazed the bushes with her hands. And then she hissed .
A small brown snake made its way out of the bushes into Lily, climbing up and entwining itself in Lily’s arm. Severus was too shocked to do anything other than stare at Lily and the snake hissing at each other, hissing . Severus has heard stories about wizards speaking to snakes. Parseltongue, Severus thought, was what they call the ability. Parseltongue was a hereditary ability, only gifted to those of the great Salazar Slytherin’s bloodline, and it was an ability usually found in powerful, and dark , wizards.
But Lily was a muggleborn, Severus was sure of that. She spoke often about her terribly mundane muggle parents and grandparents. They couldn’t have been descendants of the Slytherins, right?
Severus must’ve blanked out for a moment there, because the next thing he saw was Lily calling out his name and poking at his shoulder, the snake still tangled in her other arm. He blinked a few times, his gaze going back and forth between Lily and the snake.
“Did you just… speak to the snake?” asked Severus carefully.
Lily nodded slowly, looking down at the snake, and started hissing again.
“You’re hissing, Lils.”
Lily frowned, and then started to speak slowly, “can you understand me now?”
“Yes, now you’re talking English again.”
“Oh… I thought I was talking in English the whole time,” Lily looked back at the snake, and back again at Severus. “Can’t you understand her?”
“The snake?”
“Yes.”
“No.”
“Oh.”
Severus forced himself to relax and sat back despite the fact that a snake was casually chilling in Lily’s arm.
“I thought it was just a—you know, a common magic thing to be able to talk to animals,” said Lily.
“Well, it’s not really common, but it’s not unfounded either,” Severus explained, “the ability to speak to snakes is called Parseltongue, and it’s a hereditary ability usually found in the descendants of Salazar Slytherin.”
“But I’m not his descendant, though,” stated Lily, “I’m a muggleborn.”
Severus shrugged, it didn’t really make sense to Severus either. “Maybe you were, somewhere up your bloodline. Maybe your great-great-great-great grandparent was a wizard.”
Lily lifted the snake right in front of her face, and Severus forced himself to stay still and not swat the dangerous creature away from her face.
“That’s cool, I guess,” said Lily.
“That’s cool? Lily! That’s more than just cool !” Severus nearly shrieked. “Parseltongue is a very rare and special ability, and Salazar Slytherin is one of the founders of Hogwarts. He’s a very great and powerful wizard and you might be one of his descendants, and all you got to say was ‘that’s cool’ .”
Lily grinned at Severus, “I know, I’m very cool, aren’t I?”
“Urgh, you’re impossible,” groaned Severus, plopping back down to lay on the ground and rethink his life decision to befriend this obnoxiously powerful witch.
Lily went back to hissing, no, talking at the snake. The hissing was kind of soothing to hear, Severus thought. It was like a soft murmur or a cool breeze lulling him to sleep. Severus closed his eyes to enjoy the calmness Lily emanated from the hissing.
“Do you think the other kids at Hogwarts would find it cool, too?” asked Lily quietly.
Severus frowned and thought about how other wizards might perceive such a dark and rare ability in a muggleborn.
“I don’t think you should show it to others. People usually think of dark magic when they think of Parseltongue, and maybe you don’t want to be seen using one. You remember what I told you about dark magic the other day,” Severus explained.
“You said that dark magic was not evil ,” Lily narrowed her eyes at Severus.
“Yes, but not everyone thinks that way,” answered Severus.
Lily fell silent contemplating his answer. It’s not that Severus thought Lily should hide who she was and how truly powerful she was, it’s just that Severus thought muggleborns and dark magic weren’t supposed to go together, and that the students at Hogwarts might take that badly.
“So you think I should keep it a secret,” said Lily.
Severus shrugged, “at least until we can be certain how others might react to it.”
“And will you keep it a secret, too?”
“Of course, Lils.”
Lily stroked the snake and hissed quietly at it. Severus watched them silently and then got worried when Lily’s expression turned into a small grin that was usually followed by terrible ideas that would get them in trouble.
“I think we should swear on that,” Lily said lightly.
“Swear on what?” asked Severus.
“On keeping it a secret, my Parseltongue. It could be our little secret, Sev!”
Severus wasn’t sure that was necessary, but Lily seemed so excited at the idea of sharing a secret with him. He couldn’t possibly say no to that face.
“Okay,” Severus sat up, “how should we swear?”
Lily furrowed her brow and thought hard, before finally shrugging at Severus, “Me and my sister usually just do a pinky promise.”
Severus rolled his eyes, ”that was such a muggle thing to do.”
“Well maybe we could add something to it,” Lily suggested.
“Add what? I don’t know any spells for making swear, Mum said it’s dangerous,” said Severus.
“Um… we could add… blood? You told me wizards frequently use blood when doing magic, right?”
“Blood?” That was definitely an interesting idea, though who knows if it would actually work.
Lily nodded, “we could just prick our pinky a little, and then swear while locking our pinky together.”
“Okay, that sounds fun,” Severus agreed. Lily responded with a grin on her face, and then took Severus' right arm while extending her other hand that was holding the snake. Wait a second.
“Lily?!” Severus panicked as the snake started slithering toward his hand.
“Shush, she’s not venomous and she has the perfect tiny fangs to prickle our pinky, now hold still,” said Lily.
Severus tried his best to stay still and calm down despite the snake slithering closer to him and opening its jaw. He flinched as the tiny fangs punctured his finger, the pain was gone as soon as it came, and he saw a tiny dot of blood leaking out of his finger. Severus missed the snake biting Lily’s finger as he was focused on watching his own blood coming out.
“Okay, let’s do this,” Lily jerked him out of his focus. Severus cleared his throat and nodded at Lily. They both extended their arm and linked their pinky fingers together, each of their blood mixing with the other and began dripping down their hands.
“I swear to keep my Parseltongue ability a secret with Severus, and to not tell anyone else about it, unless we both agreed to it,” said Lily, stumbling between the words. Severus was quite sure that was not how a wizarding oath was supposed to be said, but he also didn’t really know how to say it properly, so he would just follow Lily this time.
“I swear to keep Lily’s Parseltongue ability a secret, and to not tell anyone else about it, unless we both agreed to it.”
They looked at each other for a moment before unlinking their fingers from each other. Severus saw the blood that seemed to glow on his hand and looked back at Lily. She was already grinning widely with excitement and Severus couldn’t help but smile at the little secret they both now hold.
Neither of the children realised that they did swear a magical oath that day, despite the rawness and lack of proper steps they took. Their intentions towards each other powered enough magic to their words and bound them to each other, more than they would ever imagine.
***
“Better be… Gryffindor!”
Severus couldn’t hide the shock on his face. Gryffindor? How? He was sure she was supposed to be in Slytherin with him. She was a Parselmouth for Merlin’s sake! Severus has been friends with Lily for 3 years, he knows how very not-Gryffindor she is!
Gryffindors were loud and brash and stupidly chivalrous. Lily? Chivalrous? Absolutely not. She was the meanest girl Severus has ever met (not that Severus met a lot of girls, but still). Lily always plays to win, always cheats out the rules of their little games, the rules that she made up. She should've been in Slytherin with all her cunning and pride and ambition.
And she just threw a mischievous smirk at him, that cheeky little bud. Honestly, just wait, she’ll get so annoyed by all the stupid and loud students in Gryffindor in no time, and Severus would be very glad to laugh at her suffering.
Severus spent his sorting still glaring at Lily, and the Sorting Hat immediately sorted him to Slytherin for his spite.
***
Hogwarts was amazing. It was everything Severus ever hoped for and more. Of course, growing up in the impoverished part of Cokeworth left Severus with low expectations, but Severus would like to imagine that Hogwarts would still be marvellous to him even if he grew up with finer things, like magical parents that don’t hesitate to teach him about his heritage.
Severus found himself excelling at classes, reading ahead really did wonders for his studies. It was shocking how many students didn’t even bother to read the first chapter of their assigned books before school started while Severus and Lily already finished half of their books. Charms were fun and easy with Professor Flitwick. Defence was alright, Professor Caldwell liked to blabber on the theories of spells and the dangers of casting one without understanding it, but Severus could always practice spells on his own or with Lily. Professor McGonagall was strict, but Severus was glad for it, he couldn’t stand it when the other students were whispering with each other and distracting Severus in class, though he could see the professor was a bit biased, always giving extra points for Gryffindors (i.e. Lily) and barely gave any to Severus or the other Slytherins when they managed to master a spell first.
But Potions was where Severus truly excelled. Severus had expected this, Mother often took him with her when brewing potions. Just the simple ones, like the Bruise Balm or Dreamless Sleep Potion, but the experience has made Severus familiar with the process. Although the potions professor, Professor Slughorn, left much to be desired. He seemed to be more interested in asking mundane questions to the students or regaling unrelated stories about his many friends than in actually teaching potions. But he did stop by Severus’s table a few times and give him some pointers for his potions, occasionally staring at him sharply. Once, he asked him if he had any relatives in one of the old houses, because apparently Severus looked very familiar to him.
And Hogwarts was even more amazing with Lily, of course. They spent most of their free time huddled at a corner in the library, claiming it as their spot at Hogwarts. Gushing about the new knowledge provided in class or in the endless supply of books in the library, and complaining about the boring essays they had to do. Severus likes to think that those essays are the only thing keeping Lily at the top of the class. She had practice writing essays when she went to muggle primary school, while Severus barely ever wrote anything other than scratchy notes on the interesting magic he read in his mother’s books. Lily would throw him a smug look every time she got a higher score than Severus on their essays.
Lily would also drag Severus around the castle when she got too restless after sitting too long in the library. “Such a huge castle to explore, Sev”, she said. Lily was never good at sitting still. Always shifting in her seat and moving things around and mouthing words when they were studying. So Severus would cave in and follow her when she looked like she was no longer able to simply sit down and read. Hogwarts was a huge castle.
Exploring the castle was alright, they found many hidden nooks and crannies and abandoned classrooms that they would be able to use after they learned some cleaning charms to remove the many layers of dust. They even found one particularly nice hidden alcove on the third floor with a window overlooking the Black Lake and the forest behind it. They spend their time in this hidden alcove when the library gets too full or too noisy for them. It was nice, it was just like being back at their spot beneath the tree at Cokeworth, but with magic and fascinating books in their hand.
What was not nice, however, was getting dragged by Lily to the Forbidden Forest in her mission to search for magical snakes. Severus was sure that the Forbidden Forest was called that for a reason, and that two first years shouldn’t wander there on their own. But Severus can never really stop Lily from doing crazy things, and Severus can’t just leave her to go alone, can he? It would be such a hassle if Severus ends up having to work on his dreadful essays alone because Lily was kicked to death by a herd of Thestral or something. So Severus went to follow her inside the forest, making sure that the Groundskeeper was nowhere to be seen, and trudging along the bare path while Lily hissed every 5 seconds in the hope to attract a snake or two.
And after three long tiring hours of hissing and walking, Lily decided that the Forbidden Forest was absolutely lame and not fun because she couldn’t find even one snake on their little adventure. Severus was just glad they were going back inside the castle where it’s nice and warm.
It wasn’t until they explored the dungeon that Lily finally found a snake to talk to. Well, not exactly a snake, more like a carving of a snake. They put off exploring the dungeon for so long because Lily thought that there can’t be anything exciting found there, it was too cold and too empty and too full of those proud and snobbish Slytherins. That was very hypocritical of her, Severus thought. Like Lily wasn’t as proud and snobbish as the other Slytherins, she just hid it better with her boisterous attitude and her red-and-gold tie.
“I still think you should’ve been in Slytherin,” said Severus as they were trailing after the carvings of snakes littered all over the dungeon. They were getting a little too close to the entrance of the Slytherin dorm.
“And suffer through the dreadful company of Avery and Mulciber? I think not,” answered Lily, skipping from one snake to another.
Severus scoffed, “Like McKinnon and MacDonald is a much better company? And don’t even get me started with Black. At least the Slytherins know how to behave properly in public, not shouting everyone’s ears off in the middle of the Great Hall.”
Lily turned to Severus with a sly grin, ”Exactly! They’re too proper and quiet, that’s no fun.”
If only Lily knows what kind of weird shit Avery and Mulciber did inside the privacy of their dorm. And Avery has this amazing collection of books about blood rituals that Severus knows Lily would give everything to read. It was a shame Slytherin has such a strict rule about keeping secrets of what’s going on inside the dorm. Not that Severus has much regard for some old nonsense rules, but Severus didn’t feel like becoming an outcast so soon in his first year just because he wanted to gossip with Lily.
One carving led to another and before Severus could stop her, Lily was standing right in front of the Slytherin dorm. She was studying the large carving of a snake on the centre of the wall marking the entrance to the dorm.
“Huh, I wonder what’s special about this one,” said Lily, and then she started hissing at it.
Oh no.
Severus frantically yanked Lily away from the carving just as the wall started to rumble and open. He dragged her away with hurried steps and didn’t stop until they turned several corners.
“What the hell, Sev?” Lily half-shouted at him.
“Shh!” Severus dragged her through several more corners just for that.
“Why are we running away?” she whispered this time, looking back at Severus as he checked around the corner to see if no one followed them.
“You weren’t supposed to find that!” hissed Severus.
“Find what? What did I find?” Lily’s eyes widened with excitement.
He scowled, “I can’t tell you.”
Lily furrowed her brows for a moment, “Oh! That was the Slytherin dorm, wasn’t it?”
He scowled harder.
“Ooh, neat!”
***
Severus found Lily in their nook in the library, focused on revising her notes. Potions notes, it seemed, Severus gathered from the table of ingredients at the top of the parchment there. Exams are coming soon after all, and no matter how easygoing Professor Slughorn seemed to be in class, he was a bit brutal with his grades over assignments and exams. Severus only managed two Os on his essays even after spending hours writing and revising them.
Severus took a seat at their table, pulling out his quills, ink, and notes on Transfiguration from his bag to revise.
“Mulciber called me a mudblood today,” said Lily as a greeting, not even looking up from her writing.
Severus hummed and continued opening his notes, “and the so-called marauders called me Snivellus every day, today’s not being the exception. What do you want me to do about it?”
Lily stopped her writing and glared at Severus, “you could just hex them silent when they started bothering you.”
“I could, but then another one of them would hex me back in retaliation. It’s four against one, Lils,” Severus glared back.
“It’s just four against one. I have the whole Slytherin house and a few other pure-blooded snobs from the other houses against me,” Lily retorted.
“Not the whole Slytherin house,” muttered Severus, deciding that this is a stupid thing to argue, and proceeded to get back on his revision.
Lily huffed at his response, before getting back on her revision too. They spent the next hour in silence, working diligently at their revision. Severus could tell that Lily was not satisfied with their exchange. Mulciber must’ve done something to get her this upset. This was not the first time Lily has been called a mudblood and she usually just brushes it off easily with a haughty stare that will render those bigots confused. It was so similar to the looks the pure-bloods like Malfoys and Blacks used to give to others they deemed unworthy.
At one point, Lily put her quill down and alternated between looking at Severus or staring blankly at the walls, clearly waiting for him to finish working. Well, that’s just distracting, how can Severus focus on his revision while Lily was sending impatient looks at him? He sighed as he put down his quill and looked up at Lily with his eyebrows raised.
“Do you think they’ll be scared if I start talking Parseltongue at them?” asked Lily. Oh no, she has those dangerous glints in her eyes that speak trouble.
“Lily, no. Absolutely hell no,” that was such a bad idea that Severus started panicking a little bit.
She just giggled at him. Giggled! Severus didn’t know how he managed to stay friends with this lunatic.
“Imagine though,” Lily said, still giggling, “they were calling me a filthy little mudblood and then I started hissing at them, speaking an ancient language that only the purest line of Salazar Slytherin was supposed to speak. Can you imagine the pure shock on their faces? And I should bring a snake or two while doing that, for the dramatic flare!”
Urgh, this was bad. Yes, Severus could imagine their stupid little faces as Lily hissed at them. And yes, that would be hilarious, but Severus could also imagine the backlash from all the general student population at Hogwarts if the information about Lily being a Parselmouth got out. Severus hoped Lily was just joking.
Severus dropped his head on the table with a thump. Today was already a tiring day without him needing to talk Lily out of crazy ideas. “You do know how that would be a bad idea, right?” he grumbled.
Severus could hear the chair creaking as Lily leaned back in her seat. Despite not looking at her, Severus knew she was pouting and crossing her arms like a petulant child whose toys had been taken away.
“You ruined all of my fun, Sev,” she complained.
Severus raised his head from the table and deadpanned, “I’m trying to keep you alive, Lily.”
***
Severus Snape hated James Potter. This is a fact that Severus knows will never change. Severus hated James Potter and Sirius Black and the rest of the so-called marauders gang. They were the most infuriating and arrogant people Severus has ever met. Severus shared a dorm with the most snobbish purebloods in Slytherin and yet they aren't as loud and pretentious as those fucking marauders.
It started with simple childish taunts and insults, with Potter and Black seemingly picking up on him for no reason. That was fine, Severus could handle insults. Nothing they said would ever mean anything to Severus anyway. And then they proceeded with annoying but mostly harmless jinxes and hexes. Hitting him with a leg-locker curse in the hallway, spilling ink on his parchment in class, or throwing a random colour-changing charm on his clothes. That was also fine, Severus knew the counter-curses of the spells they threw at him, mostly.
But with time the childish taunts and harmless jinxes turned into curses that would leave Severus in pain for days at a time or put a strain on his academics. It’s not that Severus didn’t know how to defend himself. He knew how to pick up a wand, he knew how to shield and dodge and throw curses back at others. He wouldn’t have survived in the snake’s den if he didn’t, what with the ridiculous amount of squabbles happening inside their common room. Severus knew how to fight, if it was a fair one-on-one fight. But there were four of them actively working against Severus and somehow they always managed to get him when he was off guard and alone.
It was just “pranks”, they always said, when a teacher caught them drawing wands against Severus. As if mere pranks would leave Severus limping for days because he fractures his knees after a bad fall. And the teachers always seemed to believe them, they were such good students, after all. Noble, chivalrous lions who could do nothing wrong.
Severus didn’t quite believe the older students when they told him to be wary of the teachers’ favouritism. But experiencing such bias firsthand has caused Severus to understand it fully. This school hates Slytherin and so they need to be able to look after themselves and not rely on anyone else. That was the very first lesson the older Slytherins taught the new ones.
So Severus taught himself all kinds of spells he could find and threw himself hard at studying things outside the class. Lily joined him, of course, she wouldn’t stand being left behind when Severus was learning such new and fascinating magic. But that still didn’t help Severus in putting an end to the marauders' bullying, and it certainly didn’t stop him from dragging himself inside an abandoned classroom near the dungeon to nurse himself from the curse thrown by Black that twisted all the fingers in his left hand.
That was how Lily found him, sitting hunched down in the dusty corner of the classroom. Muttering spell after spell in the attempt of fixing his fingers, breathing hard and trying his best to hold back his tears because fucking hell it hurts .
Lily slammed the door shut and quickly made her way to him. She crouched down next to him, yanking his hand to see the damage. Severus gave a loud hiss at her rough treatment.
“The usual healing spells didn’t work?” asked Lily.
Severus shook his head and wiped away the tears pooling in his eyes with his other hand. He hated this, being so stupid and weak and sniveling like a fucking child.
“It was one of Black’s spells, I think,” he answered, “a family spell that was supposed to be illegal if it weren’t for the Black name.”
Lily scoffed, “that fucking hypocrite.” And then she proceeded to poke and prod at Severus’ fingers with her wand.
“Lily!” hissed Severus. Damn this witch, Severus wouldn’t be surprised if she was hurting him more on purpose.
“Shush, you baby. I’m trying to figure out what exactly the curse does,” said Lily, still moving and twisting his hand to examine it closely.
Severus decided just to suck up the pain and put his head down on his knees. At least Lily was here, they’ll figure something out. She was far better with healing spells than Severus anyway.
“Huh, he didn’t actually damage your fingers. Nothing was fractured, dislocated, or torn in your fingers and muscles. He just… twisted it in place so that healing spells wouldn’t pick up on the injury,” said Lily after she was done torturing his fingers some more.
“Well it still fucking hurts so can you fix it or not?” snapped Severus. Lily tugged at one of his twisted fingers, glaring at Severus. He hissed loudly and looked away from her. He would feel bad for snapping at her if he wasn’t in pain right now. Honestly, he didn’t need her to go on a ramble over how fascinating the curse was.
“I could try, but it will probably hurt a bit more to fix it,” answered Lily.
Severus buried his head deeper in his knees. “Just fix it,” he murmured weakly.
Severus was expecting some pain from her warning, but he was not expecting to feel his bones twisting back into place. He muffled his cries into his robes, only Lily’s hand holding his firmly prevented him from pulling his hand back and cradling it to his chest.
Severus gave up trying to hide his tears and continued to sob while still hiding his face in his knees. He couldn’t be sure when the twisting stopped, but the pain slowly receded and turned into numbness in his hand.
Severus looked up and stared blankly at his newly healed, no, corrected fingers, swallowing another sob, “I hate them.”
Lily was massaging his hand, to return some sensation to his nerves, probably, and then looked at him coldly.
“So make them pay.”
***
Things went downhill from there. Severus didn’t exactly know what changed or what he did wrong. He took Lily’s advice to heart. Because although most of Lily’s advice was crazy and/or suicidal, this one was what he needed to do. He made them pay.
He stopped just avoiding and escaping the marauders. Instead, he decided that it was time they got the taste of their own medicine and began plotting his own attacks. He started drawing his wand first, throwing hexes and curses from behind then hiding away to escape their retaliation. Picking and practising dark spells he read in books borrowed from Avery and Mulciber to throw at the marauders. And it felt good.
The other Slytherins started looking at him closely, as if reevaluating his worth in his house. Lily gave him her hidden sly smirks every time she caught what he did. And he stopped feeling helpless from being on the receiving end of the pranks.
And the marauders, oh, they were livid. They were not expecting him to fight back, and they clearly weren’t used to feeling the pain from the curses Severus threw at them. Pettigrew was the easiest target, always walking at the back of the group and unaware of his surroundings. It was so easy to quietly throw a curse that caused him to be covered in boils or vomit slugs. Lupin was somehow very resistant to a lot of curses, most curses would simply sizzle away upon hitting him, or just push him back a step or two but not really give him the desired effect. And Black has a surprisingly high pain tolerance, nothing short of the bone-breaking curse would make him flinch. It simply wasn’t fun when your target didn’t show the appropriate responses.
So Severus focused his effort on James fucking Potter. He was the loudest and most annoying one anyway. And Severus simply couldn’t stand the obnoxious way he is chasing after Lily. Following after her like a puppy, loudly calling her Lily-flower, and announcing his so-called love for her to the whole school. Just who the fuck does he think he is? Like Lily would ever spare her time for someone like James Potter, not even to humour him.
To Severus’ surprise, she did spare her time for James Potter. Severus began noticing odd things from Lily, of how she seemed to listen closely every time Potter said something and how she nodded along to the shite coming out of Potter’s mouth. And she was getting quieter around Severus and getting snappier every time Severus complained about Potter and his gang.
Severus didn’t know what the hell happened to his best friend, and he was not liking these changes in Lily.
She stopped coming to see him when he was hurt from curses thrown by the marauders, spent less time with him, and started to hang around her Gryffindors cohort more and more. Good riddance, Avery told him, but Avery didn’t know Lily. He didn’t know how Lily used to complain about the girls in her dorm being too vain and mindless. He didn’t know how Lily hated how rowdy the Gryffindor common room was and how she despised the way those marauders were often praised by the other Gryffindors for their annoying pranks.
Severus could sense that there was something wrong happening with Lily, that this was not his Lily he was seeing. His Lily would not choose to hang around with McKinnon than to break down a new spell with Severus, would never nod her head at something Potter said. His Lily would never abandon him.
And deep in his right mind, Severus knew that his Lily would never just stand by and watched impassively as Severus was hung by his ankle and got his trousers pulled up by James Potter in front of the whole school, showing his manhood to be laughed at by everyone. But then Severus was thrown down to the ground harshly, gravel and fallen twigs pressed painfully at his body, and trousers still pooled at his ankle.
Severus slowly picked himself up and, oh fuck, that felt like a sprained wrist. He could hear Potter and the gang walking away loudly, and he raised his blurry gaze up at the crowd. Lily was still there, staring at him, he could recognize those blazing red hair anywhere.
He stood up and fixed his clothes to cover up as best as he could. Eyes hardening at Lily, hoping, begging for her to show at least a little bit of anger in his stead. Searching desperately for a familiar spark in her eyes. Severus limped toward her only to stop after a few steps. He saw her turning around and going toward Potter when he called for his Lily-flower.
It felt like a fire burst inside his body and burned him from within. She chose Potter of all people, and abandoned him in the dirt. And so all of Severus’ rational thoughts and suspicions for Lily burned away by the sight in front of him. Severus felt the loss of control of his body and screamed.
“You filthy mudblood!”
***
The reality of what happened didn’t quite settle with Severus for a while. Days passed in a blurry haze and numbness, Severus was just going through the motions, only alone this time. He barely remembered what happened that day. One moment he was screaming at Lily, and the next he was laying crumpled in his bed, too exhausted to do anything else.
He did something bad, said nasty things to Lily. He didn’t mean it, of course he didn’t. What would he care about blood status? He knew Lily was a muggleborn and she was still the most brilliant witch he has ever met.
But things were already said and done. Lily had abandoned him, and Severus called her a mudblood. The slowly growing distance between them has turned into an uncrossable chasm. Maybe what people said was true after all, that it was not possible for Gryffindors and Slytherins to stay as friends. That there were too many differences between them. It didn’t matter that Lily was all that Severus had for years, the only one who had ever understood him. Or maybe she was just putting up with him this whole time, and now that she had found better, more popular friends, she decided that she was done with him and ditched him.
It’s not that Severus didn’t try to fix it. He did. He called her on the corridors to ask if she could spare her some time to talk, only to be shoved off by McKinnon or chased away by Potter. He would find her alone in the library and she would pack up and leave immediately the moment she saw him. He even waited for hours in front of the Gryffindor’s common room until a prefect found him after curfew and forced him to go back to his own dorm.
Severus did everything he could to try and fix what he did wrong, and Lily didn’t even look at him once, didn’t even give him a chance. Once, he saw her sitting right next to Potter at breakfast, smiling vapidly and batting her eyelashes at him, and Mulciber had to hold Severus down so that he wouldn’t stomp his way to the Gryffindor table and yell at them, and possibly curse them in front of the whole school.
Well, fine, then. Maybe it was for the best. If Lily could go on without him, then he could too. He could focus on perfecting his potion modification or pouring over every book on Dark Arts borrowed from Avery, now that Lily wasn’t around to interfere. He could just spend his time with Avery and Mulciber. They weren’t so bad, really, they know when to pester him and when to leave him alone. And Severus couldn’t help but feel pride every time they asked for his help in Potions and Defence, and he could appreciate the hungry gleam in their eyes every time Severus showed his potions improvement or the new spells he invented.
With Avery and Mulciber around him, the rest of the Slytherin students’ attention also shifted to him. He stopped being the quiet forgotten half-blood and gained a sort of prodigy reputation. They talked and asked about his gift in Potions, eager to ask him for favour when they need a particularly difficult potion to brew or even just to have him explain the theory behind it. Yes, perhaps his life changed after Lily left him, but he couldn’t say if it was for the worse or for the better.
Oh, and Severus found just how much information and knowledge he was missing out because he was too busy following Lily around. The gossip from Mulciber ranges from who was having an affair from their current partner to who was messing around with dark, powerful spells. The ancient tomes from Avery that were shown to him now that Avery wasn’t worried that it would fall to the hands of a mudblood. And the whispers about the Dark Lord.
Severus did hear about a Dark Lord from way back in his first year, but it was just another thing happening in another outside place then. It wasn’t something that affected him in any way, and he got his hands full with studying as much magic as he could and following Lily’s various whims. And Severus never really cared much about the politics around it, anyway. He never planned to get involved in it, he just wanted to graduate from Hogwarts and be left alone playing around with spell creation or inventing new potions.
But he was just a stupid naive young boy back then. He learned since then that it took money to play around with potions, the ministry regulates heavily on new spells and potions, and most importantly, that it took money and connections even to just live sufficiently as a hermit out of everyone’s way. Both things that Severus didn’t have and was now only begun working on. And now that he listened to what people were saying about the Dark Lord, He seemed like the perfect solution for all of Severus’s problems.
The Dark Lord was working on the freedom of Dark Magic and removing the Ministry’s corrupt bureaucracy that was hindering their magical progress and innovations, and He was looking for talented young wizards to recruit. Well, Severus thought he was talented enough to enter the Dark Lord’s service, and perhaps He would give Severus enough funding and creative freedom if he manages to prove his worth to Him.
***
"The one with the power to vanquish the Dark Lord approaches... Born to those who have thrice defied him, born as the seventh month dies...”
Severus stayed kneeling on the floor, his Dark Mark still warm from the after-effects of a burning summon. He wasn’t expecting to be summoned so soon after his last one, it was mere days from the day Severus delivered a half-heard prophecy to his Lord. Severus had hesitated before delivering the prophecy, cautious over the importance of such vague information and the suspicious circumstances around it. But the Death Eaters have long learned that it was better to provide as much information as they have than to be punished later for withholding one that they thought wasn't important enough for their Lord.
“Prophecies are such curious things, don’t you think, Severus? So fickle and… ambiguous,” the Dark Lord spoke softly, almost like a hiss.
“It is, my Lord,” replied Severus. It was always a challenge to converse with the Dark Lord. Severus had stumbled through his words many times, unsure if the Dark Lord was expecting an argument or just his submission.
“I’ve narrowed down the potential… threat of the prophecy into two children. One would be the child of Frank and Alice Longbottom, and the other one being the child of James and Lily Potter. What would you suggest I do, Severus?” asked the Dark Lord.
Severus’ breath hitched at the name of his former friend. No, focus, this is not the time to lose his head over some old relationship and memories. The Dark Lord asked him a question, and Severus had no fucking idea how to answer it. It wasn’t like he has been a subject of a prophecy before, the fuck if he knows what to do in that situation.
“I asked you a question, Severus,” hissed the Dark Lord.
Oh, fuck, okay, think, Severus. “You could—,” Severus’ voice hitched, he cleared his throat, “You could observe, for now, My Lord. As you said, prophecies are fickle and ambiguous and very prone to be… self-fulfilling. My… suggestion would be to monitor those families to see whether they would become a much more significant threat than they already are,” answered Severus.
The Dark Lord hummed in response. Surely the answer Severus gave was at least satisfactory, what else could he suggest? Killing off the qualified children and all the other children born in July the next year? That wouldn’t be sustainable for the community.
“My thoughts, exactly,” the Dark Lord replied. “Though I would take a more direct route and examine both children closely myself. See which one has the most potential to be a threat, and eliminate it immediately, if needed.”
“That would be wise, my Lord,” said Severus. Personally, Severus didn’t really fancy killing off children, but what could he do if the Dark Lord already decided on it? At the very least he wasn’t killing them straight off without proper examination.
“And you wouldn’t have any problem if I were to attack the Potters, Severus? I’ve heard you were quite close with Lily Potter.”
Severus felt his heart sink to his stomach, and he struggled to breathe for a moment. He had tried his best to detach himself from Lily. Avoided all the talk surrounding her and her relationship with Potter, dismissed all the reports from his fellow Death Eaters about battles fought against the Potters, and got himself away from missions that would possibly lead to an encounter with them. But still, Severus couldn’t help the dread in his chest when hearing his Lord about to target her.
He gulped and took a deep breath. “I would ask for you to spare her, my Lord. She—,” Severus felt his mind emptied so suddenly, what was he about to say? That Lily was valuable, that she was… powerful and to lose a witch of her ability would be a waste. Was that it? Severus was sure that there was something more about Lily. But oh, Severus would have to deal with that later, his Lord was still waiting for his answer.
“She was quite a formidable witch. If possible, she would be a great… asset to our cause,” Severus finished.
“Would she? All the reports showed how entrenched she was in the Light beliefs and how devoted she was to her husband,” said the Dark Lord.
Severus swallowed the bile that rose in his throat. “She wasn’t always like that, my Lord. We were—She used to be much more open in her approach to magic,” explained Severus.
The Dark Lord hummed, “We shall see, then.”
***
“That fucking scumbag,” Lily hissed .
Harry stared at her from his crib, safe and sound with her best wards protecting him. Bright green eyes peered at her, the perfect replica of her own eyes. The only thing from her that he inherited, the rest of his features screamed the Potter blood. What a shame.
Lily could feel her mind getting cleared of the fog that had shrouded her mind for years. Years . James Potter had poisoned her for years. How could she be so stupid to fall for this? She would’ve committed suicide before agreeing to date, let alone marry, that pitiful excuse of a wizard. So proud and arrogant and entitled without an ounce of brains to back it up.
But now she was freed from his influence and stuck with this child staring back at her with her own eyes, and the Dark Lord just downstairs on his way to kill her. Oh, right, the Dark Lord. He must’ve killed James and nullified his potion’s effect on her. Maybe she could thank Him before He killed her.
A noise brought her attention back to the child in front of her, Harry was grabbing the crib bars and trying to stand. He fell back down on his bum, his strength not quite enough yet to support himself standing. He scrunched his tiny little nose and glared at Lily, arms outstretched.
“Up,” said the boy. No, not said, the boy just hissed .
Lily peered closer at him. If he could speak Parseltongue, if he got one more thing from her aside from her eyes, then maybe he could be hers after all.
“What did you say, hatchling?” asked Lily, her hissing stilted and uncomfortable after years of disuse.
“Up! I want out!”
Harry was a Parselmouth, he was hers. She smiled sharply, gathering him in her arms and holding him perhaps a little bit too hard. At least one good thing came out of the years of suffering she spent under James Potter’s influence.
“Oh, you are a wonder, little one,” she hissed. Not noticing the Dark Lord arriving at the door and watching them for a while.
“Well, isn’t this a surprise?”
***
Whatever it was that Severus was expecting when the Dark Lord summoned him for the third time in two weeks, it was not this. To be honest with himself, he was expecting news about the Potters or the Longbottoms demise from being caught in the prophecy. He did his best in trying to convince the Dark Lord to spare Lily, but it was war and Lily was standing on the other side. Severus didn’t dare put too much hope on her survival.
But, as it often happened when it came to Lily, she proved him wrong, again.
Here she was, in the Dark Lord’s study, trembling and holding a baby in her arms. Her eyes found him as he rose from his kneeling position, hard and angry the way he hoped to see back then when they were still students arguing about pranks and jinxes.
Lily put down the baby on the couch harshly, a gentle rush of magic stopped him from toppling over. She took quick strides toward him and crushed him in an embrace.
Severus was struck speechless with the familiar feel of her magic, and pulled her closer to him. It felt like coming home.
“I’m back now, Sev.”