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He took a shaky breath and tried to order his thoughts to stop them from racing but everything was so hazy that he couldn't grasp it and the world felt like it was spinning. Blood ran over his lips and dropped from his chin onto his hands but he couldn't bother to wipe it off or get a towel.
He had lost. After years of always having the upper hand he had lost.
He had missed his aim too many times and hadn‘t managed to conceal those mistakes through new hits. In the end it had cost him his victory and he had for the first time since forever hit the ground and couldn‘t get back up. It was a strange feeling.
The boxing club where Reggie liked to go wasn't exactly legal, hidden from Ryan's eyes in the depths of Rapture behind a bar that officially belonged to a man named Richard McKelly but unofficially belonged to his good friend Frank Fontaine. He had first built it to get some pent up anger out and give his bodyguard a place to train but soon it had become a secret meeting spot for all the people who were fed up by the underwater paradise and needed some more radical distractions. Fontaine often used that to recruit people for his new plasmid programs promising them a small fortune for their services or to get inside information about certain projects. Then he sat by the bar, watched Reggie fight, sipping a drink and talked with a few people or just listened to the men talk.
Today hadn't been any different and the bodyguard had seen how he had furrowed his brows in confusion when the man had to take one hit after another. Fontaine had noticed him getting weaker in the past weeks but he had thought he would catch himself again especially after he had started to get his sleep and eating schedule back in check and even had stopped drinking since a week or two but apparently it had only gotten worse.
Sighing, the businessman downed his drink and slighted a few coins to the bartender before getting up to get a wet towel to help Reggie clean himself up. Quietly he came over to said man who sat on one of the benches in the back and kneeled down to be on his eye level observing his bruised face.
"Chin up." He ordered calmly and his bodyguard followed blindly like he always did lifting his head but avoiding making eye contact. He was clearly ashamed of what had happened and didn't want to face his employer just yet. Frank decided to have mercy on him and not comment on it. Instead he let him be and rubbed the blood off his broken nose and open lips. Then he placed the cold towel on the other's neck to stop the bleeding and watched him, unlikely concerned.
He wished he knew what was going through his friend's head recently. Reggie had had his low moments before where nothing had seemed to have gone his way but usually after getting himself back in check it got better and he got stronger again. This time that didn't seem to be the case.
"Not your day today, huh?" Fontaine asked after a while, keeping his tone light and a little teasing like he often did to let the other know he wasn't mad about what had happened and more a bit concerned. Reggie hadn't looked this blue and green after a fight since a while and against all his better knowledge it worried Frank.
The bodyguard swallowed ashamed and nodded quietly. "I really tried, boss. I swear." He mumbled apologetic and rubbed his one eye which was itching a little to make it stop. He was so exhausted.
Frank nodded understandingly and frowned. He didn't like that defeated look on the other's face. It didn‘t suit him. "I believe you.“ He said, sounding honest and gave the other a slightly awkward but sympathetic pat on the shoulder. „Today's fight was no competition anyway and until the next you will be back on track. You will see. Everyone has a bad day once or twice." He encouraged him and even forced himself to give the other a hopeful smile but it didn't seem like that helped either.
Reggie still looked down and sat uncomfortably slouching forward on the bench making himself as small as possible like he wanted to become invisible which was difficult as a huge man as he was but Frank could swear he might manage it if he only would blink once.
Indecisive, he kneeled in front of his old friend before sighing and getting up. They really needed to sort this out but not here in the open and in front of all the customers. They could do it just as well at home with a drink on a comfy sofa. "Come on, stop looking like a cat that fell into a well. Get up and take a shower. We will figure this out at home." He offered even though it sounded a lot more like an order and stretched his hand out to help Reggie up. The man hesitated for a moment but then accepted it and dragged himself to the showers in the back of the boxing club.
The cold water helped to clear his mind a little bit and bring life back into his numb limbs but also made him shiver and the fresh cuts burned worse than he remembered them doing in the past. Grunting he changed back into his formal clothes and came back to Fontaine who had waited at the bar talking with the bartender about some plasmid advertisements to keep himself busy. He just couldn't stand being bored for even a second.
Reggie could feel the judging eyes of the other men on him as he walked and it made him only go faster, embarrassment burning hot on his cheeks. This was just humiliating and he was glad that the babythsphere port was close by and didn't have to walk through whole Rapture like this. He didn't even want to think about what the newspapers would write if they knew.
The invincible bodyguard of Frank Fontaine after years got finally beaten! Read about it here! Yeah- no. Then he could immediately look for a new job. His friend would never keep him close if he ruined their reputation like that.
The idea of leaving the other man made his stomach cramp and he quickly shook his head to get rid of those overly dramatic thoughts making himself nearly stumble in the process. That wouldn't happen. He would figure out what was wrong with his left eye and where those black spots in his vision came from that made fighting so difficult and fix it. Then he would go back to normal like nothing had ever happened and Fontaine would never have a reason to search for someone else to protect him. With a bit more determination back in his mind he reached the businessman and waited even patiently until he had finished his conversation with the bartender and they could go home instead of urging him to leave like he had planned to after his shower.
The bathysphere ride went by rather quietly. Fontaine watched the fish outside the window, one hand rested between him and Reggie, their pinkies interlocked as a comfortable way of feeling closer to one another while the other tapped a rhythm onto his own thigh. He seemed to be busy thinking about something which was just fine for the other man so he wouldn't notice how often he rubbed his troubled eye or had to grimace because a light made a white flash cross his vision once again. It was unnerving. Some days ago it hadn’t been this sensitive and easily triggered. Reggie really hoped today's fight hadn’t made it worse and he would go completely blind on his left. He would lose his depth perception and would have to relearn so many things that he would be nothing but a burden for months. A burden his fast moving friend couldn't use.
The realization made his stomach turn and he felt so suddenly sick from the shock that he had to lean forward and breathe controlled through his nose to not get dizzy and gag. Startled by the rushed movement Fontained turned around and looked at him confused before understanding the situation and starting to softly rub his back like he often had done back on the fisher ship when Reggie had gotten sea sick and they had been stuck alone in his cabin.
Showing affection and comfort when they were around people was something that rarely ever happened between the two of them and if it always felt awkward but if they were alone it could be quite nice and bittersweet.
„You’re alright?“,Frank asked trying to keep the concern out of his voice and failing miserably as he watched his bodyguard slowly sitting back up and taking deep breaths to alleviate the nausea. Usually the bathyspheres didn't make Reggie motion sick but maybe he had gotten a bad hit against his head today and it made him easily dizzy even though Fontaine hadn’t seen such a thing happen from his spot. He still should lay down and put some ice on his forehead once they were home just in case.
Reggie nodded hesitantly and sighed. “It’s getting better.” He lied but kept his eyes closed in hope it wouldn't remind him of what he had just thought about. Every time it dawned on him again it made him sweat a little more and his throat tightened that he wanted to gasp. And still even it troubled him so much he couldn't get himself to tell his old friend about the problems he had been having for weeks.
They may have known each other for so long and trusted each other more than anybody else but they also had changed over the years. Especially on their way to and in Rapture Frank had become the kind of man who Reggie was sure would leave him behind if he didn't get himself back in check and was useful for his plans. It was too much of a risk to have someone vulnerable close to him if he wanted to take over a city. But Reggie couldn't lose his only friend. He meant so much to him, more than he ever had thought someone could and he would go through hell and back for him but how would he do that if he was broken?
Suddenly he got torn out of his spiralling thoughts as Fontaine pulled him close to make him lean against him and rest his head onto his shoulder while he continued to rub his back.
“I can nearly hear you thinking.” He complained even though there was no real bite in his words. “It's okay, Reggie. Today was rough and maybe you caught something and that's why you feel so off. It will get better.” If it only was so easy, the bodyguard thought but nodded well-behaved and simply accepted the attempts of his friend to comfort him. “At home I make you something nice to drink, we put some ice on your bruises and see how we get you back to old strength. How does that sound?” Fontaine looked down at him and gave a soft encouraging smile while holding him a little closer.
Reggie cleared his throat to answer but then decided against it and just hummed agreeing, closing his eyes again. They would tackle this at their apartment.
The rest of their way home they stayed silent and avoided any kind of people as best as they could to not get Reggie into the misery of having to explain his bruises and lost fight to anybody else than the one that knew already. Arriving at their apartment they put their coats up and while the bodyguard already made himself comfortable in the living room, Fontaine mixed them both a drink. He made sure to make Reggies a lot less strong than his own and packed some ice into a towel before walking up into the other room with everything easily balanced in his two hands.
He gave the drink and cloth over to his best friend who thanked him quietly and then let himself fall into the couch across from him kicking his shoes off and laying his feet up. Content he sipped his drink and closed his eyes for a second to relax. The day had been busy and all that worrying hadn’t made it any less exhausting. They deserved a moment of peace. Then they could tackle their current problem. It didn't look like Reggie wanted to talk right now anyway…
That moment however didn't last very long as a strange sound and a curse from his friend made Frank soon open his eyes back up and glance over to him seeing him trying to place his glass back on the table which must have fallen off but luckily didn't break. Confused, the businessman frowned and sat back up properly but when he wanted to ask teasingly how he had managed that the question got stuck in his throat.
Reggie had his jaw clenched so strongly together that he could even see it from his spot on the couch and how he narrowed his eyes was alone enough of a sign that a breaking point had been reached and needed all his mental strength to hold himself together. Today simply too much had gone wrong.
Quickly Fontaine got up and got a towel from the bar helping to clean up without complaining or making a fuss. Then he sat down next to the other fully turned to him so he had all his attention and looked at him with a serious expression. “Alright, tell me what’s going on, Reggie. I have accepted your excuses for a while now but you're starting to really worry me. And you know how much I dislike that. What's wrong?” He asked, trying to be as honest about his feelings as he could and watched as his friend seemed to want to curl up on himself again and avoided looking him in the eyes.
Reggie opened his mouth but no sound came out and closed it again. He was struggling with finding the right words and rubbed nervously his left eye again.
He was so scared of what could change if he admitted his new weakness. How Frank might see him afterwards. How he would even react… but he knew he couldn't carry on like this running against shelves, misplacing his glass or losing fight after fight. It wouldn’t get better on its own. He had to accept that. He needed help and his friend was the first step.
Taking a deep breath he tried again. “I think- I think I'm going blind in one eye. There are black spots and flashes of light sometimes and it's just getting worse everyday. I barely can judge distances anymore. It's- It‘s making everything a little difficult.” He explained fidgeting with his hands and looking at his feet. His voice wavered indicating how much the subject scared him even though he still held himself together surprisingly well.
Fontaine stayed silent for a moment and then cleared his throat, noticing that his old friend wouldn’t go more into detail if he didnt urge him too.“Since when?” He asked shortly, being himself a little shocked but making it so difficult for Reggie to judge by his voice alone how he thought about the matter. It made the bodyguard's anxiety spike up and he had to take another breath before he could answer and tears wouldn’t begin forming in his eyes.
“A few weeks… maybe a little over a month. It wasn't that bad in the beginning, really. I thought it would pass if I slept enough and stopped drinking but it didn't.” He admitted and swallowed as slowly the realization hit how long he was already struggling with this.
His friend seemed to need a moment to collect his thoughts before he breathed out and shook his head rubbing his temples. “Jesus Reggie- why didn't you say anything? We could have gone to Tenenbaum. We are still going- but sooner we might have been able to prevent this from happening completely.”
The bodyguard shrugged and leaned back, staring at the ceiling fighting the overwhelming feeling to just cry after all. Pathetic.
“I thought if I wouldn’t be able to do my job you wouldn't want me around anymore. I'm of no use and just a burden if I can't help and your plans are so big... There is just no space for a broken old me.” His voice was barely above a whisper and a few stray tears ran down his cheek.
A wave of guilt rushed through Fontaine when he heard his friend's explanation why he had lied and he chewed on the inside of his cheek thinking about his next words before moving closer to the other and taking the others hands in his own, getting him to look down and into his eyes. “I'm sorry I made that impression on you, Reggie.” He said calmly so the other understood that he meant it seriously and rubbed his thumbs over his knuckles which were still bruised from today's fight. “We have known each other for so long already and you're my best friend Reg.. a lot more than just that honestly.“ He added, a little embarrassed and huffed trying to get rid of the warmth that spread through him at the realization what those words actually could mean if only said a little differently.
Feelings were such a strange thing. Reggie was the only one who ever had seen his true ones more than ones and had survived since he was the exception. He was the exception for so many rules Frank had set for himself in the years and he just couldn’t stop making him one. He had stayed with him even when one identity had died and another had stood up. He had come close to him, had seen him cry and suffer and had made him submit. He was the exception to everything and he would always be one. Fontaine wondered if that was how real love felt like.
“I would never throw you out because of something like this, Reggie. Besides that I'm sure that you will learn to adapt and would be anything but useless, even blind, I would keep you around even if the only thing you did was keeping my bed warm.” The man continued quickly and made the other man snort and shake his head.
“Now you’re exaggerating, Frank.” He chuckled and whipped some of his tears away from his cheeks sniffling.
“I'm not.” The businessman pouted, keeping the atmosphere light before he chuckled himself and went on. “You mean a lot to me and no sickness or disability would change that. You are all I have and all I ever need, Reggie.”
The bodyguard smiled softly as a light blush graced his cheeks and held the others hands a little tighter. “I love you too, Frank.” He whispered knowing what he had meant without having to use the words which commitment he feared and gave him a light kiss on the cheek before resting their foreheads against each other closing his eyes.
For a moment they enjoyed just being close to one another, feeling each other’s breath in their skin comforting and warm before Fontaine came back to the subject they had spoken about before. “Tomorrow we will go to the scientists and see what they can do about your eye. If you want we can surely fix it, at least partially, with Adam but that's your decision. I won't pressure you into doing anything. We can also just train so you adapt quicker to the change. Whatever sounds best to you.” He offered and lightly cupped his best friend's cheek, rubbing it under the eye that troubled him so much.
Reggie nodded lightly and sighed relieved that there was hope for him after all to be able to go back to normal. “Thank you, Frank.”
“No reason to thank me yet, big guy, but we will figure this out, I promise.” Fontaine said determined and leaned forward when his bodyguard came closer to kiss him for the first time not because he wanted him but because he loved him and was glad they had each other and always would have.