Chapter Text
Mysta wished it was a gradual thing. Like in the movies, stuck between forlorn gazes and clouded judgments. Maybe linking pinky fingers while the skies are the perfect shade of pink. A bloom so sweet it could rot teeth.
Instead, it was more like turning the faucet on too fast by accident and getting immediately scalded.
Burning, hot, so fucking hot.
A steady mantra in his head as he felt himself get pushed further into the mattress. The mix of his hair sticking to his sweaty nape and the accompanying sensations felt like an attack on his senses to the point where he could only grit his teeth and mewl.
His skin was on fire and the only one who could make it better was currently kissing bruises down his neck. Maybe making it worse, instead.
When Shu’s canines prodded at the soft skin connecting Mysta's neck and shoulder, he couldn’t help but purr, snaking clawed hands through Shu’s hair to get him even closer.
Mysta could hear and feel Shu exhale sharply into his skin and his vision blurred.
It really wasn’t supposed to be like this.
“Shit.” He mumbled somewhere against Shu’s temple as his mouth dried and his brain felt like it was being stuffed with cotton.
How did it turn from sleepovers to this?!
Another curse slipped through his clenched teeth when the hungry force on top of him nipped at his jaw before lapping at the sensitive area as if to take it back before doing it all over again.
Mysta imagined Shu wasn’t in his right mind either, judging from the slurred reassurances he whispered against Mysta’s skin, fingers digging into the damp skin of Mysta’s back where it would definitely leave marks under his scrunched up sweater.
Not a single thought could ground itself long enough for the man to even visualize it before it was gone, replaced by the incessant need for more of whatever Shu was able to give him.
So hot.
We’re friends.
Please bite me.
What am I gonna say?
Come closer.
He wouldn’t be able to look Shu in the eye after this.
All because he liked how he smelled.
See, Mysta got anxious sometimes. It was happening less these days, when the adrenaline during streams raced through his body like wildfire, thus leaving less room for thoughts about things that made him jolt awake at night.
He could only do so much however, until the burn-out was apparent in his dark circles and humorless giggles over Discord. Take a break, they’d say, and Mysta would look down at his shaky hands and refuse until it felt natural enough to say without thinking about it too much.
The preposition turned into an order after a while and he had no choice but to begrudgingly accept. It was supposed to be easy. Just do nothing. That was the problem.
He once zoned out and stared at the computer screen until his eyes hurt, lost in the way his chest felt fluttery and his skin went hot only to go ice cold the next minute. His foot tapped harshly against the flooring, completely off beat with the quiet music playing in the background that didn’t end up helping.
A name flashed in his mind only to be immediately wiped away by something intangible, an extension of himself buried deep in his brain that grated away at his self-preservation. Mysta clicked his tongue and ran a hand through his hair, streaking along sweat that beaded at the edges of his scalp. He felt gross.
He didn’t want to bother him, especially when he looked like he did right now.
The tail of his eyebrow twitched, like being tied to an invisible string being pulled by an even more invisible force, so Mysta grabbed his scratched up phone from the edge of his desk.
Shu moved to the neighborhood a few weeks back, a risky but ultimately wise decision on his part. It definitely helped having at least one coworker nearby for convenience. Mysta had joked about having private tech support when he first helped his friend move in and earned a hearty laugh from the other.
He distinctly remembered how casually handsome Shu looked in the moment and how the box of paraphernalia in his hands suddenly felt ten times more heavy. Webcams didn’t do him justice. It was a good memory, and it made Mysta smile down at his phone where his message to Shu stared back at him. He grimaced when reality slapped him in the face.
Even if he rewrote it exactly 6 times, he was mostly proud he sent it anyway. Though they lived nearby, Mysta could count the times they met up for something other than work on one hand. It still felt weird to be this physically close to someone he only knew over the internet for most of their friendship, and ultimately, Mysta didn’t want to intrude.
They wordlessly agreed to mostly stay out of each other’s way in hopes of not wasting each other’s time and Mysta could live with that, the introvert in him feeling pleased with the way things ended up being.
But maybe, just this once?
However, sudden regret squeezed at his stomach the moment the small delivered icon filled up next to his text, and his brain immediately started damage control.
hey! i know u have a day off today so i wanted to see if u were down to come to my place? we can order pizza or something :^)
if u dont want to its completely fine i understand if u have other things to do u dont even have to respond to the original text im kinda dumb!!!!!!! 😭😭😭
Mysta wanted to smash his head against a rock. Maybe two rocks.
Lifting his face from where it was buried in his clammy hands, his eyebrows furrowed as he stared into the surface of his desk. Why the fuck was he doing this in the first place?!
It’s not like he was lonely. The phone screen lit up and Mysta was too aware of how quick he snatched it up, only to realize it was just a YouTube notification, making his face droop.
Was he lonely?!
“Ughhhh.” He groaned into his hands again, only to start stretching and shuffling around the desk in a futile attempt to release the nervous energy building in his body.
Why did he ask Shu specifically? He could have easily asked anyone else for a voice chat call until they spewed out every typical reassurance one could realistically give until Mysta felt satisfied enough and crawled into bed just to repeat the same sequence the next day.
He was annoyed at how easily he sabotaged himself. How much he refused to think, how much he liked skirting around things until they bit him in the ass.
Mysta wanted Shu near. He was close, tangible, real. Mysta just needed something real right now. He wasn’t sure why exactly, but his stupid animal brain was giving him cues he just couldn’t ignore at this point.
Not that he thought of Shu that way! Shit.
While his mind raced, the phone screen lit up again and Mysta took his time with slowly inching his hand towards it until the edges of his fingertips touched it just enough for the screen to not turn off. He glanced, eyes narrowed.
sounds good :)
Mysta’s breath hitched in his ribcage when he practically launched himself from the desk to start vacuuming.
A few hours later, they both stood in the middle of Mysta’s apartment, Shu in one of his soft turtlenecks, taking note of Mysta’s decor while the other man nervously paced on the spot. He had managed to shower and clean up most of the apartment as fast as he possibly could, and now that he was done his mind was completely blank.
The pizza was on the way, so they were stuck in this awkward limbo of their own making.
Shu glanced at Mysta’s PC setup, eyes immediately widening.
“Yoo, it looks really good.” He leaned in to look at the details but kept his distance to the point Mysta wondered if he could even see anything. It was kind of cute.
“Got inspired by yours.” Mysta mumbled back, picking at the sleeves of his hoodie before glancing at his phone to check the time. Where was the delivery guy?!
“Hey.”
His head snapped up at the slightly harsher tone being directed at him, but Shu’s eyes were bright and relaxed, the corners of his mouth quirked.
“Relax.”
It wasn’t a command, or an order, but an itch in Mysta’s brain he wasn’t aware ached to be scratched suddenly quieted, replaced by the familiar feeling of warmth as the back of his neck flushed.
What the fuck.
“Y-yeah.” Was all he could stammer out with a smile that didn’t reach his eyes no matter how hard he tried. Shu must have noticed, head slightly tilted, but Mysta quickly blurted out an excuse to go to the bathroom before he was asked anything.
Locking himself inside, he immediately went to splash his face with cold water, as if it would rinse off the crawling pink now staining his cheekbones. He usually wasn’t this sensitive, especially to verbal cues that didn’t even mean anything. The stress must have been getting to him more than he thought.
Mysta ran wet hands through his hair and exhaled as far as his body would let him before quietly leaving to find Shu, who was seated on the couch looking none the wiser.
After apologizing profusely and being reassured, the pizza finally arrived, letting them finally have a moment of something other than awkward staring. Shu cracked a few jokes and Mysta found out he could play off of them effortlessly, giving him enough confidence to switch between a few topics before they were both full.
Plopping unceremoniously back on the couch later in the evening, Shu recommended an anime Mysta hadn’t heard of before, so they agreed to at least go through the first episode.
It was lighthearted and funny, but Mysta’s attention span swirled down the drain as the minutes added up, his eyes fighting to stay open after finally having a chance to relax. Shu shuffled next to him, clearly fighting the urge to nap right then and there himself and Mysta giggled to himself.
Only to go dead serious when Shu leaned in closer and an unfamiliar scent wafted up towards him.
Shu smelled really fucking good.
It was the smell of a forest in the middle of an early autumn rain shower, a warm, earthy fragrance that settled into the back of Mysta’s skull like a drug.
He prayed Shu didn’t notice how much his pupils widened and how hard he struggled not to pant into the too-long sleeve of his orange hoodie. They agreed to watch a few more episodes, Mysta in a state of torture the entire time with his inability to say no.
He was always bad at picking up scents, especially when he limited his exposure to people in the first place, not even mentioning the conditions of his job. They were usually very faint to him, almost unrecognizable, even in alphas who smelled up a storm when even the slightest bit irritated or moody.
The episodes went by in a flash and Mysta couldn’t remember what they were about, all too focused on the damn smell of rain and how his entire body twitched whenever he’d look in Shu’s direction.
It’d be a lie if he’d said his brain wasn’t making up.. scenarios. Mysta cursed the almost primitive part of his mind that told him to climb Shu like a tree or roll over and whine like his life depended on it.
This was one of his best friends, someone he looked up to and cherished more than he realized. The rational part of him was disgusted.
So when he shot up from the couch determined to send Shu home as politely as possible and saw his friend sound asleep, sinking into the cushions of the couch, his mind went blank.
The sight and overwhelming scent stuffy in his lungs were suddenly too much. He quickly placed a nearby blanket over his sleeping friend, careful not to get too close and sprinted to his room, jumping into his bed and scrambling under the covers like a fish out of water.
No matter how hard he’d press the duvet against his face, the scent lingered, like it stained every corner of skin to the point he could smell it without breathing in. Mysta froze up, trying to steady his aching body, the outside noises suddenly too loud and his bed too soft.
Amidst all of.. that, he hadn’t realized the strange flutter in his chest was gone. He felt awake, jittery, but he felt real. Feelings he never experienced before tugged at his heart and it was embarrassing.
Mysta kicked his feet and cursed into his hands until exhaustion got the best of him.
The next morning, Shu greeted him in the living room, cluelessness floating away in his pretty eyes while Mysta struggled not to do something he would regret later. Sending him away after a mediocre breakfast was harder than Mysta imagined, especially when Shu gently tapped his shoulder and disappeared down the winding staircase like an afterimage.
It wasn’t weird that Mysta waited outside until the door to the apartment complex closed, wasn’t weird when he sprinted to his windows to check if Shu crossed the street safely, wasn’t weird when he couldn’t let go of the blanket Shu had used the night before, gripping the soft fabric until his bones hurt.
Right?
And it definitely wasn’t weird when he asked Shu to come over again. And again. And again.
And it most definitely wasn’t weird that Mysta started letting him sleep over in his bed, mostly because a sense of impending doom would take hold of his body whenever Shu would just leave the room for a minute, and then mostly because it was getting harder to control himself.
It was surprising Shu kept agreeing, more surprising when he’d press into Mysta’s back in the middle of the night and purr, the other fighting off the urge to pass out so he could savor the moment.
Aside from all that, Mysta felt light. He could breathe during the day, get work done without overthinking and have enough free time until Shu came over to relax. It was nice having a routine, even on days when Shu couldn’t make it. He did feel pathetic waiting in front of the front door like a lonely househusband. He didn’t feel lonely, however. At least not anymore.
If Shu could tell Mysta was acting differently, he never commented on it. He was always more perceptive and logical while Mysta was more emotional so it wouldn’t shock Mysta if he figured things out by now. He was content to stop everything if Shu felt the least bit uncomfortable, but sometimes Mysta thought Shu made it worse on purpose.
It was in the way he’d sometimes lean in too close, stick by Mysta’s side the same way Mysta wanted to stick by his, the way his eyes would linger a bit too long.
Mysta wasn’t dumb. He knew this was how bonds were formed, maybe by accident, maybe intentionally, but the constant exposure to each other’s pheromones had consequences. Late at night he’d think about the effects it would have on their job, on their friendship, up until Shu would shuffle his way into Mysta’s space and the smell of rain would wash away any rational thought like a bucket of water over his head.
However, after a while, he wasn’t sure how much of it was pure instinct and how much of it was himself.
He’d be lying if he said he didn't find Shu attractive. If they weren’t coworkers, Mysta would have no qualms about being with him if the chance arose. He had a boyish elegance about him with a touch of absolute nerd that made people go woozy. Mysta wasn’t blind to it, but an online friendship for so long dulled the experience for him.
Now, Mysta saw him from a new angle. The little quirks and intricacies that only Mysta knew about. He’d trace the sharp lines of Shu’s face in the dim light when they’d be in bed together, listening to the soft rumble of his chest as he snuggled into the soft sheets of Mysta’s bed.
A voice in his brain would whisper mine.
Mine mine mine.
One time he snapped out of it with his face inches away from Shu’s neck, panting so fast his ribs hurt, the only thing on his mind being with how much he wanted Shu’s scent all over him.
It scared him, the way he couldn’t control himself sometimes.
Mysta quickly found out Shu couldn’t either.
He woke up in the middle of the night after a particularly eventful day with Shu after work. Mysta remembered being insanely tired to the point he passed out almost immediately after going to bed, so waking up suddenly didn’t feel right.
Right away, he could smell rain. So much rain. It felt like rainwater was seeping through his walls and ceiling, and the scent he’d almost gotten completely used to felt foreign. His body was quick to react, heart jumping in his chest and all the blood rushing to his head.
Jolting up, it took a moment for his eyes to get adjusted to the dark, and when they did, the hunched over figure on the edge of the bed was the first thing he discerned. Mysta tried easing his breathing, hand reaching over to tap Shu on the shoulder. Was he sick? Shu’s scent was so strong it made Mysta dizzy.
He barely made contact with Shu’s hoodie before the other flinched and turned, hair an absolute mess, chest shivering with every inhale and exhale. Even in the dark, Mysta could tell how flushed he was. Bringing his hand back to his face to block out the smell, Mysta leaned in to see better. A mistake.
“You oka-!”
Shu pounced across the length of the bed with superhuman strength, Mysta’s world spinning when he collided with the mattress as if he was being wrestled. His arms were useless, pinned to the sides of his head as his body betrayed him.
Shu was like a torrent over him, tangy in the back of Mysta’s throat. Pupils like pinpricks in the moonlight, his throat bobbing up and down as he struggled not to salivate. Mysta felt hypnotized.
His friend blinked, once, twice, three times, easing up the grip on Mysta’s arms with incoherent mumbles. “I’m sorry, sorry, I didn’t mean it.” Only to immediately lurch forward, an animalistic growl bubbling from his mouth, barely audible.
Shu lowered himself even further until his wet lips grazed the edge of Mysta’s ear, back arched like a panther’s.
“You smell really good.”
The way he said it was too low, too close, too enticing for Mysta’s touch starved body to handle. He swiveled his head away just to bring it back in time Shu moved his head back, managing to catch his lips with his own.
Mysta couldn’t help the small sounds he made against Shu’s mouth, licking into the wetness while his hands traced Shu’s shoulders up to his neck and face, pulling him in like a whirlpool.
He thought Shu smelled nice, but he tasted amazing. A sugar cube melting on his tongue, warm and saccharine like honey. He licked at the corners of Shu’s swollen lips to wipe away saliva, earning a few nips and bites in the process that made his chest rumble.
Shu would pull away to breathe for barely a split second, too focused on marking every inch of Mysta’s skin he could get his mouth on, from his lips to his jaw to his neck where he’d lick at the sensitive scent glands, feeling his friend arch and whine from under him.
Mysta felt like fainting every time Shu’s tongue rested flat against the gland, the very tips of his fangs scratching at the skin to the point Mysta had to kiss him again before he lost all control, grabbing at Shu’s hair while the other pulled the collar of Mysta’s sweater over his shoulder, going back to marking and lapping as soon as Mysta was satisfied.
A stinging pain shot through Mysta’s collarbone where Shu suddenly bit too hard, making him wince and twitch, his friend immediately jolting up, glazed over eyes searching Mysta’s for confirmation he was alright.
The look in Shu’s eyes was too cute, and Mysta took his time to really appreciate how pretty he was, with his dark hair falling in waves around his small face, cheeks flushed and lips swollen. He leaned forward to kiss him again, giving him a quick nip on the nose on the way back as reassurance, but Shu wordlessly searched for something more.
Mysta smiled, mind a haze, nosing at Shu’s temple and muttering against his damp skin.
“It doesn't mean anything.”
That was enough confirmation for Shu, who immediately pushed Mysta deeper into the mattress, shivering body practically covering Mysta’s as his mouth worked wonders down his exposed skin. The smell of rain was everywhere.
So hot.
Come closer.
Please bite me.
Mysta’s body screamed for more, for Shu to go lower and lower until he absolutely broke Mysta down, for him to finish what he started, but when Shu’s hand accidentally touched a particularly sensitive spot near Mysta’s tailbone and his hips instinctively twitched, a switch went off in Mysta’s brain.
What the fuck were they doing?!
All wide eyes and stammers as he wiggled out from under Shu’s grasp, trying to fight off a bodily function he rather wouldn’t think about right now. Shu chased Mysta’s mouth with his own until Mysta was fully upright on the bed and shuffling down towards the floor to stand, legs shaking and clothes crumpled.
Shu sat up on shaky knees, not bothering to push his bangs away or to fix his clothes, the growl in his voice still breaking through when he spoke. “Is everything okay?”
Mysta froze at the closed door to his room, trembling fingers barely holding onto the doorknob as he flashed a smile that didn’t travel past his sticky lips. “My stomach hurts, I’ll be right back.” It wasn’t a complete lie.
He made sure to clench his legs as he shuffled down the hall, leaving Shu alone on the bed as his delirium washed away, exhaling loud enough where Mysta could hear it across the apartment.
They fucked up.