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Koutarou has never wanted to talk to somebody as badly as he does right now. He’s trying to maneuver through all the sweaty and exhausted volleyball players to get to Karasuno’s spot in the gym, desperately seeking for their Tsukishima. He’s usually easy to notice, towering over everyone in his team – and save for Lev, this entire camp – but no matter where he looks, Koutarou can’t find him anywhere.
He needs to talk to Tsukishima.
The match between Karasuno and Fukuroudani ended only a few minutes ago, and he can hear his teammates celebrating their victory behind him, but Koutarou doesn’t care. Yes, they won, but they have won many times before, and they will continue winning in the future, so skipping one celebration is really not a big deal.
When he gets near Karasuno, he finally spots Tsukishima. He’s sitting on the ground, Sawamura, their coach, their adviser and Tsukishima’s best friend are all around him. He’s signing to Takeda-sensei, but Koutarou can’t see his hands clearly because of Sawamura standing in the way. He decides not to barge there immediately, he doesn’t want to disturb them. He’ll just wait until they finish.
It takes a couple of minutes, but Koutarou is patient. Well, he isn’t always patient, he’s quite the opposite when he’s on the court. But right now, he is, no matter how every inch of his body aches to go and talk to Tsukishima. One look at him, how small and vulnerable he seems sitting on the ground, and it’s enough for Koutarou to tolerate the wait.
With the last few words, Takeda-sensei and Coach Ukai move away, leaving Tsukishima with only his best friend and captain. Sawamura pats Tsukishima’s shoulder a couple of times with a reassuring smile, and then he’s gone after the adults. Finally, his best friend needs to go as well, because Karasuno still has their punishment to go through. Best friend doesn’t seem eager to leave Tsukishima alone, but after a few dismissive hand gestures, Tsukishima manages to send him away.
It’s my cue.
Koutarou wonders how he should get Tsukishima’s attention. When his sister is on a hearing break, he usually turns the lights on and off a few times at a rapid pace, to let her know that he’s there and he wants something from her. In a gym, though, it’s pretty much out of option.
Luckily, he doesn’t need to think too much about it, because Tsukishima seems to notice him, and his golden eyes snap right at Koutarou.
He furrows his brows as he sees Koutarou walking closer, until he’s sitting cross-legged in front of Tsukishima. He smiles and waves at him.
“I can’t hear you,” Tsukishima tells him, nodding towards the broken hearing aid on the floor next to him. “So, if you-
“It’s okay, ” Koutarou signs, also saying the words out loud. Tsukishima seems surprised, his eyes open widen and his mouth falls slightly agape. “I can sign, so we can talk.”
Tsukishima seems shocked, and Koutarou finds the sight amusing. He’s usually stoic, much like Akaashi. Before today, Koutarou hasn’t seen any emotions displayed on his face – well, to be fair, he’s only known him for three days – except for annoyance. He also has that smug smirk and mischievously shining eyes whenever he teases his teammates.
But other than those, Tsukishima never shows any emotions. Koutarou is a tiny bit pleased with himself that he managed to pull something out of him so early into their conversation.
However, when Tsukishima doesn’t answer for a while, only continues blinking at Koutarou, he starts losing his smile. Has he overstepped a boundary, or something? He knows Tsukishima can sign, he’s seen it a million times in the past few days. He’s even noticed that when he and his best friend don’t want their teammates to know what they’re talking about, they switch from words to signs, even if Tsukishima’s hearing aid is on.
Is he uncomfortable signing with people outside of his team? Does he feel threatened – Koutarou is older, and he’s the captain of another team, they don’t know each other too well. Or maybe now that he can’t decide whether he wants to hear or not, he feels too vulnerable? Did Koutarou make a mistake by coming here?
Maybe he shouldn’t have. He’s famous for doing things without thinking them through first, without making sure they’re good ideas. Why did he think it was wise, again? It was stupid, so stupid to think that-
“I’m sorry,” he blurts out, forgetting for a moment that he should sign. “I didn’t want to offend you, or-
Tsukishima places a hand on Koutarou's arm, stopping both his signing and talking at the same time. He looks up at him, and sees Tsukishima’s shocked expression gone, replaced with a small, barely-there smile.
“No, it’s okay. I’m sorry. You just surprised me, that’s all.”
Heavy weight falls from Koutarou’s shoulder, and soon he finds himself grinning again. He understands why his teammates say that his mood changes are drastic. A moment ago he was ready to stand up and leave, ashamed of his actions, and now he could jump for joy, he feels so happy. Tsukishima doesn’t hate him, and he’s not scared, at least it seems like that!
“My dad and both my elder sisters are deaf,” he explains. “My parents started teaching me JSL very early.”
Tsukishima smiles again. Koutarou realizes that making Tsukishima smile feels exactly like making Akaashi smile. And Akaashi is his best friend – does that mean Tsukishima is his friend, too, now?
He can practically hear Akaashi scolding him for thinking this. You’ve been talking to him for only two minutes, Bokuto-san. I don’t think that’s enough time to settle on a friendship.
And maybe Akaashi’s voice is right. But Koutarou doesn’t care. From now on, he considers Tsukishima his friend.
“I only started learning seven years ago,” Tsukishima says, “And I’m still learning, actually.”
Koutarou’s suddenly very confused. He furrows his brows and tilts his head to the side.
“How come you only started learning seven years ago? You weren’t born deaf?”
And yes, he realizes that it’s not necessarily the most appropriate thing to ask from someone who he’s only met three days ago and is having his very first conversation with right now. But his mouth, as always, is faster than his mind. His curiosity always wins over rationality.
Fortunately for him, though, Tsukishima doesn’t seem offended.
“No. But I was born hard of hearing. I started learning JSL because the doctors said that there was a possibility for me to lose my hearing completely. And I did. Roughly five and a half years ago.”
It makes Koutarou sad. He can’t imagine what it might feel like to lose his hearing, but he guesses it’d be horrible.
“I’m sorry,” he says, but Tsukishima shakes his head, stopping him.
“It’s fine. I used to feel sorry for myself, but not anymore. It doesn’t stop from living my life.”
The confident expression on his face is enough to convince Koutarou that it’s true. Not like he thinks being deaf should stop people from living as they want. Hell, if he’s learnt anything from his dad and sisters, it’s that being disabled isn’t the end of the world. But it’s certainly nice to be reassured that Tsukishima thinks the same.
“I’m glad you think that, ” Koutarou says, his smile growing even broader. Then, his eyes travel to the hearing aid on the ground. “Can you play without that, though?”
Tsukishima sighs – it’s a sad, resigning sigh that causes Koutarou’s heart to fill with sadness. He has a feeling of what’s coming, and he doesn’t like it at all.
“I can play,” Tsukishima says without signing, too busy to do so as he stares at the broken device. Then, he looks back at Koutarou, and proceeds to sign. “But I wouldn’t hear my teammates, and that’s way too dangerous for all of us.”
Koutarou pouts. Tsukishima is such a good blocker, and he seems to enjoy playing a lot, especially when his best friend is subbed into the game as well and they can play together. Not being able to do it anymore clearly makes him sad, and Koutarou, who’s always been known for picking up on other people’s moods easily, feels as sadness floods him as well.
“That’s a shame, ” he says. “We wanted to invite you to practice with us.”
Tsukishima purses his lips. “We?”
“Yeah. Me, Akaashi, my setter and Kuroo. You know him, right?” Tsukishima nods, and his eyes travel to Kuroo. Koutarou glances at him as well. Unsurprisingly, he’s annoying Kenma at the moment. He’s probably trying to convince them to confess to Hinata. Kuroo has been trying to make them do it for the entire camp. Kenma seems really fed up at this point.
He turns back to Tsukishima.
“Why?” Tsukishima asks.
“We need another blocker, and you’re great.”
“I haven’t even come close to blocking your spikes, why would you want to practice with me?”
“See? Exactly! You need to practice if you want to block me. And anyway. ” He scoots a bit closer to Tsukishima, and lowers his voice. He decides it’d be best if he only mouthed his next few words, to avoid Kuroo accidentally overhearing what he’s about to say. “ Kuroo’s been pining over you since Golden Week, but he’s too cowardly to make a move.”
Tsukishima’s eyes widen, and his face flushes a very dark shade of red. It makes Koutarou laugh loudly. He’s been right, then. He’s seen how Tsukishima looked at Kuroo from afar. Tsukishima has a crush on Kuroo, Koutarou is sure of it. But no matter what he tells Kuroo, he refuses to take action and ask him out.
Kuroo’s never been afraid of rejection. In fact, he’s been rejected more times than not. But now, he’s straight up terrified of being rejected by Tsukishima, so he decided to just admire him from the other side of the net and occasionally talk to him when he has a chance after matches.
This tells Koutarou that whatever Kuroo feels for Tsukishima, it’s more than his usual crushes that don’t last longer than a couple of days. And now that he’s sure that Tsukishima likes Kuroo back, Koutarou will be damned before he lets his best friend miss out on an opportunity to ask him out. Or just talk to him about things other than volleyball.
That’s the main reason why he wanted to ask Tsukishima to join them. The fact that he’s a good blocker with great potential is just the cherry on top.
But now that Tsukishima is probably benched for the entirety of the camp, even individual practice, it’s going to be much harder than he thought.
“And I’m pretty sure you like him, too.”
Tsukishima takes off his glasses and buries his face in his palms. “Is it that obvious?” He asks, but he doesn’t look up to see Koutarou’s answer, so he thinks it must’ve been a rhetorical question.
He stays like that for a while, and Koutarou lets him. He probably feels very embarrassed that he’s been exposed like this, and Koutarou would feel bad about it, if he didn’t find the situation hilarious. He wonders what would happen if Kuroo asked Tsukishima out. Kuroo would probably stumble upon his words so badly that Tsukishima wouldn’t be able to read his mouth, and he himself would become a blushing mess once he realized what Kuroo’s trying to say.
Maybe Koutarou should teach Kuroo a few signs. I’d like to ask you on a date would be the best thing to start with.
Tsukishima finally looks up, and his face is a lot less flushed than earlier. Koutarou starts signing, but before he could say too much, Tsukishima interrupts him.
“I can see your hands moving, but I don’t know what you’re trying to say. My eyes are useless without my glasses.”
Koutarou pouts. Tsukishima doesn’t seem eager to put on his glasses, which cuts their way of communication entirely. Tsukishima, however, smirks at him the same way he does when he teases his teammates.
“I often do this when I get tired of somebody. Hearing aid off, glasses off, and they can’t bother me.”
Despite still feeling pouty, Koutarou has to laugh again. Tsukishima has a strategy on how to escape from people when he doesn’t feel like talking to them, and no doubt it works every single time. He wishes he would put his glasses back on, though, he really wants to continue talking to him. They don’t need to talk about Kuroo, really, he just wanted to see if his theory about Tsukishima liking him back was true or not. Now that he has the answer, he’s more than willing to change the topic.
He nudges Tsukishima’s hand with his, the one that he’s holding his glasses in, a silent plea. Tsukishima clicks his tongue and rolls his eyes but compiles. As soon as he fixes his glasses on his nose, Koutarou starts signing again.
“Let’s not talk about Kuroo, okay? Now that you can’t practice, it doesn’t matter, anyway, right?”
Tsukishima shakes his head. “I have another hearing aid at home,” he says. “Takeda-sensei is talking to my brother right now. I don’t think he has a spare six hours to bring it here and then go home, though. But if he does, then I’ll join you for practice tomorrow.”
Koutarou beams once again. He knows it’s a long stretch, but he can’t help the hope bubbling deep inside him. It’d be so cool to practice with Tsukishima! Not only because of Kuroo, or because he needs another blocker, but also because he likes him a lot! He really wants to be Tsukishima’s friend, and what's a better time to get to know each other better than during individual practice?
Not to mention that they can switch to sign language at any time, which means they could mess with Akaashi and Kuroo! Koutarou can already tell that they’d have so much fun!
“I hope your brother can make it, then. I want to hang out with you.”
Tsukishima smiles once again. Koutarou likes it when he does that.
“Me too.”
And then, a sudden realization washes over Koutarou, and a thought that hasn’t crossed his mind yet is now demanding his full attention.
“Wait, can you talk to anyone like this? I only saw your best friend and your advisor sign so far.”
He’s never been good at smooth topic changes – when he thinks of something, he has to get it out of himself immediately, whether it fits into the topic or not. He can’t help it! He feels so bad now as he imagines Tsukishima being alone, because the only people on the team who can sign are his advisor and his best friend.
Tsukishima, luckily, doesn’t seem sad, nor does he look surprised by Koutarou’s out-of-the-blue question.
“I read lips pretty well,” he says. “And when I can’t, my team always takes time to write it down for me. Also, they can sign basic things, Tadashi and I taught them a lot. Hinata, Kageyama and Yachi are actually taking JSL lessons. Yachi is doing great, Hinata and Kageyama not so much. But I appreciate the effort.”
“That’s amazing!” Koutarou means that. He thinks what his teammates do is amazing, especially the first years! It seemed like Tsukishima wasn’t friends with Hinata and Kageyama, but if they’re willing to learn sign language, then Koutarou must’ve misunderstood their relationship completely. This is a positive surprise for sure.
Koutarou remembers how happy his sister was when her best friend, who she met when she was sixteen, told her that she had taken up a sign language course. Tsukishima must be really touched by it, too. The gentle smile on his face is proof of that.
“Yeah, it is. So yeah, I can talk to them, it's not a problem.”
That’s such a relief. However, he wonders how much Hinata will talk to Tsukishima after what happened. He seemed pretty guilty, he had to be subbed out from the game for a few rounds because he was so mortified by what he had done.
It was an accident, really. Hinata was about to serve, and Tsukishima was standing in the front line. Hinata was taking a bit longer to hit the ball than usual, confusing even some of his teammates. Tsukishima turned his head to the side, probably trying to see why Hinata hadn’t served yet. And exactly at that moment, the ball hit his ear.
Hinata went pale as he heard Tsukishima’s pain groan. Koutarou, who was also in the front row on his side of the court, watched it as Tsukishima grabbed at his ear and his face scrunched in pain. The game was paused immediately, everyone from Karasuno, even the ones currently on the bench gathered around Tsukishima.
Koutarou saw from the corner of his eyes as Kuroo stood up from the ground, and watched the scene with a worried expression. He didn’t go closer, but he obviously wanted to.
Tsukishima took out his hearing aid, and cursed loudly when he realized it was broken. Hinata started panicking and apologizing, not realizing that Tsukishima couldn’t hear him. He only stopped when Coach Ukai put a hand on his shoulder to calm him down. Tsukishima then glanced at Hinata, and although Koutarou couldn’t see his face, by Hinata’s expression he could tell that it wasn’t nice.
Hinata then apologized again, this time using sign language. And then again. And a couple more times. After a while, his movements blurred so much together, that it was barely understandable anymore. Tsukishima then stopped him, and signed something that Koutarou couldn’t see clearly, but he thought it was, “It’s fine. Stop apologizing, idiot.”
Tsukishima was taken out of the game, replaced by Karasuno’s number eight. (Koutarou hates that he doesn’t know most of their names. He only knows Tsukishima, Sawamura, Azumane, Hinata and Kageyama. He will have to ask Tsukishima about the rest later.) And Hinata was subbed out with their number six for a while.
“That’s good,” Bokuto signs instead of saying his worries. He truly thinks it’s amazing that his teammates are willing to learn for him. “And you can talk to me, too, if you ever get lonely. We can sign and stare at people to make them think we’re talking about them.”
Tsukishima laughs. Koutarou thinks he understands why Kuroo likes him. He definitely doesn’t have any feelings for Tsukishima, nothing outside the platonic scale, at least, but he can certainly see what Kuroo sees in him. He really hopes Kuroo can get his shit together and ask him out. They’d be so perfect together.
Karasuno arrives back from their penalty runs, their intense trapping and stumping gets Koutarou’s attention immediately. Koutarou doesn’t know if Tsukishima notices them because of how he snaps his head at the direction of the front door, or because he can feel the vibrations the million feet are causing in the floor, but he also looks up, just in time to see the firsts of his teammates entering the gym.
Koutarou lightly pats Tsukishima’s knee to get his attention back.
“I’ll go now. We’ll have a match soon. Let me know if your brother can get you your aid, okay?” Tsukishima nods. “I’ll come and see you later.”
It’s starting to be weird, how much Tsukishima smiles in this conversation, but Koutarou can’t complain. One of his favorite things to do in the entire world is making people smile, laugh, or just generally make them happy. He’s swelling with pride that he managed to make Tsukishima, stoic, scary, easy to annoy Tsukishima smile like this. He can already visualize Kuroo’s jealous face when he tells him about it.
“Thank you, Bokuto-san,” Tsukishima signs.
Koutarou grins. Tsukishima has nothing to thank him for. He just really hopes that they can become friends.