Chapter Text
Firestar was dying, and it was painful. The feeling of reinforced claws slicing across his neck and chest was incomparable to anything he’d ever experienced before. The raw agony blinded him as he faded in and out of consciousness. Wheezing for breath, desperate to fill his lungs. But he found himself choking on his own blood instead, blinking rapidly in an effort to focus but his vision was stained with sticky and crimson liquid. His own blood he realized with a jolt. Through that haze of red he could only make out flashes. Pure, indescribable pain rippling across his skin, the world fading into darkness. He could make out something, a faint light, but it was gone and he once more returned to an agonizing, bloody existence. The process continued, repeating itself until he lost count. The only memory he retained at the end of it, was the figure of a small black cat, looking down at him, victory flashing in his icy cold eyes, before things went black for the last time.
Firestar was left hanging in darkness. His limbs numb as he floated there for what felt like seasons, reaching out his paws for that distant light that returned once more. realizing idly that it was starlight. His eyes drifting shut once more, his awareness returned. The sensaiton of grass against his fur told him he still on the ground. Taking a few more deep breaths, he realized he could no longer taste his own blood.
He wasn't sure how long he lay there. Mind numb with the pain. Body heavy and fur matted with blood. But when he finally opened his eyes, it wasn't to the gory battlefield he'd been facing Scourge in. It was a peaceful starry meadow, one he recognized quickly. He'd been here before, standing in the star speckled grass when he received his nine lives.
StarClan.
With a pained grunt, Firestar forced his paws beneath him, struggling to sit up. Why was his body so heavy? Was losing a life always this painful?
"Firestar..." came a familiar voice ahead of him.
Glancing up with a start, he was met with the stern icy eyes of his mentor, his leader, Bluestar. He was reminded of the warrior she'd been, before Tigerstar's betrayal, at her death, and finally at his leader ceremony. At first he was filled with relief upon seeing her again. Except there was something unnerving about her expression. It was one of repressed sorrow. A carefully composed face to hide the pain she truly felt beneath.
"Bluestar?" He croaked, swallowing thickly, his throat felt dry and course. Like he'd swallowed dust. If what he remembered from Bluestar's own lost lives, he'd recover from this pain soon enough. Had it been this agonizing for her those other times?
"So I've lost a life?" He asked, finally managing to stand on all four legs. Staring down at his fiery pelt, he saw the wound on his throat was gone, no blood stained him. Instead he could make out the faint pinpricks of stars now embedded into the fur, and yet he felt weaker then ever.
Bluestar didn't answer, her eyes closing as if another wave of grief had passed over her, and she was trying to repress it.
He couldn't swallow the feeling that something was terribly wrong. With a terrified jolt, he realized he and Bluestar weren't the only cats here. His eyes widened as it seemed that almost the entirety of StarClan was gathered around them. Motionless as they watched him, the starry tall grass rustling against all their paws. The silence was eery and unnerving.
Runningwind, Lionheart, Stonefur, Silverstream, Redtail, Whitestorm who died only minutes ago, little Gorsepaw, and many many more familiar faces. Unfamiliar ones. All clan cats. All sharing similar looks of despondency and sadness.
"Bluestar what's going on?" He asked, feeling his desperation grow. He needed to get back, his clan needed him! Why was this taking so long?!
"Bluestar!" He cried again, louder, more urgently, and that seemed to finally snap Bluestar out of her thoughts. Her eyes snapping up to his, he felt like an apprentice again under those blue eyes.
"You've lost more then a life Firestar..." she said gravely, her voice even, but even he could hear the undertones of pain "You've lost nine..."
Firestar stumbled back with a gasp. His horror practically choking him as he struggled to comprehend what she just told him. All nine?! No! He couldn't die! Not like this! Not when his clan needed him. His thoughts went to Tigerstar, killed by his own hubris that had taken the form of Scourge's claws. Seeing the way the broad shouldered, dark tabby had convulsed and died nine times over. Had Firestar truly died just like him?
"I can't have! I can't! My clanmates! They need me! I have to go back!" He cried, looking around desperately, The splendor of Starclan felt so hollow in the face of his terror. He only stopped when his eyes caught sight of something behind him. Something he didn't recognize at first.
It was a large pool of water, as starry as the grass that rustled all around them. And in the reflection of that water, he saw a horrifying sight.
His clanmates, losing the battle. He raced forward, a wail tearing from his throat as he leaned over the edge, thrusting his face right to the water's surface.
He watched as Deadfoot was pinned to the ground, his throat ripped out by a BloodClan cat. Mousefur, screeching as she was overwhelmed by several more cats, desperately attempting to escape, only to be pulled back into battle by several reinforced claws. Leopardstar and Mistyfoot, fighting back to back, managing to hold off several BloodClan cats, but not for much longer. A WindClan cat he didn't recognize, leading several apprentices, including Stormpaw and Featherpaw, to safety. Many cats fleeing or attempting too. With just as many being slain, their blood turning the entire field red, looking almost on fire in the light of the setting sun. It felt like such an ironic yet purposeful sight.
Finally, there, in the center of the clearing, stood a gloating and familiar figure. Scourge, his head thrown back into a victorious yowl. With Firestar's mangled corpse lying motionless beneath him.
"No!" Firestar cried, throwing himself forward, struggling to swim in the sparkling waters. Desperate to somehow reach his body. To kill scourge and save his clan, to save the clans. He struggled and thrashed as teeth dragged him furiously from the pool. Bluestar had rushed in after him, pulling him out by the scruff of his neck.
"Firestar stop it! There's nothing you can do!" Came Bluestar's stern, yet sympathetic voice, holding Firestar down when she finally managed to drag him back onto solid ground. His his fighting and thrashing came to a stop, feeling cold but not from the water soaking his pelt. He lay there panting. Eyes burning with sorrow as he shut them tightly. A low moan building in his throat. Swallowing it down, he looked to Bluestar again, desperately hoping for an answer, a solution. But none would come.
"There has to be something..." he pleaded, but Bluestar could only shake her head.
"There isn't..." she murmured, her tail hanging low as she stood in front of her old deputy.
He was afraid to ask, but he needed to know. Standing up once again, he forced himself to meet her gaze, to face the consequences of his failures "What... what happens now?" He asked, his eyes wandering back to the audience of StarClan. All of them had similar expressions of sorrow and grief.
Bluestar sighed "Not all our cats were killed but... they're scattering," she said, approaching the pool once again, where the battle had come to an end, the only ones left wandering it now were cats who wore teeth studded collars. Bloodclan had truly won.
"They're in shambles now... the clans... are no more," She mewed with a sad tip of her head, lifting it once more to address not only Firestar, but the StarClan cats in attendance. She was every bit the commanding leader he had known her to be. Staying strong and composed in the face of uncertainty.
"Our clanmates are fleeing, and in order to watch over them, we must do the same. Just as the clans have dispersed, so too must we!" She called, trying to keep a brave face, but her voice had a slight waver. But with that decree the StarClan cats began to depart, all walking in separate directions. Presumably following in the pawsteps of their living descendants. To watch over them and guide them in any way they could. Silent guardians now.
Firestar shook his head, this wasn't his things were supposed to be. LionClan was supposed to win! They were supposed to take back the forest!
"Bluestar! Please! Things can't end like this!" He cried, pleading as his mentor began to follow the forms of a dark ginger tom and blue grey tom. He recognized them as her mate and son, Oakheart and Stonefur. Heading off to follow Mistyfoot perhaps?
"I was supposed to be the fire that saved the clans!" He cried, his grief and shame overwhelming him. Tears welling up in his eyes as he silently begged his mentor to stay, to offer some kernel of wisdom, to tell him there was some hope for the future.
But Bluestar looked as grief stricken as him, her head dipping sadly, turning back to face him. He almost wished she didn't look so understanding. He wished she'd screech at him, hiss and bristle over his defeat. Something, anything. He couldn't stand the silent and almost broken acceptance. But what could they do? They were only spirits, meant to guide the living, but unable to fight their battles for them.
"Prophecies aren't set in stone Firestar, and the only thing we can do now, is move forward and do what we can for the clanmates we have left," she said, sighing she turned forward once again, holding her tail high as she padded forward to join her family.
Firestar let out another groan, turning to face the starry pool. The only cat left now. Staring down at the chaos, the one his failures had caused. Bowing his head as he shut his eyes.
"I'm so sorry..." he mewed softly, but there was no one left to hear him.
"I failed."