Work Text:
"Good moooorning!" Bai Wuxiang declared as he kicked open the door to his siblings' bedroom.
"Rise and shine kids!
He was not met with a happy welcome. In fact, his three little siblings were ultimately unhappy to see him.
"Five more fucking minutes," Qi Rong growled and buried his head underneath his pillow.
"Come on, don't you want to get ready for your big day?" Bai Wuxiang scolded as he stepped into the room, arms wrapped around the laundry basket.
"What big day?" He Xuan mumbled as he curled deeper into the sheets.
"School," Bai Wuxiang reminded them with an amused smile.
None of them at all looked keen on getting up or going to school. Hua Cheng didn't even shift.
He tsked, and set the laundry basket down, pulling a strand of his hair behind his ear, before standing and marching to the window.
The window was flung open, lighting up the whole room. The others were horrified.
Hua Cheng scurried underneath his covers with a growl of discomfort, Qi Rong screamed and cursed trying to battle with the rays of light and He Xuan just rolled right onto the floor.
Bai Wuxiang could barely hold back his amusement.
"Aren't you guys a little too dramatic?" he rolled his eyes. "You've got to go to school. Seriously, get up."
This was their usual routine on a school day. At 19, he'd become their defacto parent and they were living off the trust funds from an anonymous source. They were orphans, not really biologically related, but he was in charge of them and that trust fund paid for the runts' schooling.
So by hell or high water, Hua Cheng (10), He Xuan (7) and Qi Rong (5) were going to school!
They were wide awake now as the only way to go back to sleep was to pull the blinds closed and he was baring the way.
So one by one they dragged their ungrateful assess to the bathroom.
****
Hua Cheng got up that morning with no desire to get up that morning. He was even more irritated to get to the bathroom and find Qi Rong there. His youngest brother had paused, hand outstretched to his toothbrush.
"What do you want ugly?" Qi Rong glared and Hua Cheng narrowed his eyes.
Two minutes later, Qi Rong was flung out of the bathroom with Hua Cheng locking the door behind him.
Bai Wuxiang had just put in the laundry when Qi Rong's screams reached him downstairs.
"OPEN THE FUCKING DOOR YOU FUCKING DOG FUCKING WHORE, SHIT PILE OF FUCKING SHIT!" Qi Rong howled.
Bai Wuxiang sighed but this was technically a normal morning. He didn't know where a five-year-old got such colourful language but it wasn't the kind of thing that would just go away. Slamming and screaming at the bathroom door was Qi Rong's morning routine. Hua Cheng wouldn't open that door till he was done.
Bai Wuxiang figured he'd use the time to make breakfast and he was in the middle of that when he spied, to his horror, He Xuan trying to bathe with the hose outside.
"He Xuan!" he cried.
He Xuan looked guilty about being caught but the fact that he tried to run with the hose proved that he hadn't given up.
Bai Wuxiang cursed, rushing outside to grab the ridiculous child and drag him back inside.
"How many times do I have to tell you to stop bathing with the hose! It's not clean!"
"It's water," He Xuan mumbled.
"It's streaking!" Bai Wuxiang roared.
What was he to do if the neighbours caught him doing that? He couldn't deal with a lawsuit or stress, he'd be tempted to kill his enemies....worked last time.
"Done!" Hua Cheng declared and hopped right out of the bathroom, the door slamming Qi Rong and sending him flying.
"A-Chengzhu, be more mindful of your brother," Bai Wuxiang scolded.
"He shouldn't stand so close to the door," Hua Cheng muttered unapologetically. He'd been mean to Qi Rong ever since the little boy broke his favourite toy and laughed about it.
Then again Qi Rong was a tough person to be nice to.
"HOW DARE YOU SLAM THIS ONE'S MIGHTY BEAUTIFUL FACE, YOU UGLY BASTARD!" Qi Rong screamed.
Bai Wuxiang plopped He Xuan inside the bathroom and headed out.
He Xuan slammed the door behind him and Qi Rong was once again back to banging and screaming on the door.
Bai Wuxiang raced down the stairs and got busy making breakfast. Something simple like pancake and eggs would do. Some fish for He Xuan, boiled eggs and meat for Qi Rong, and flower aesthetic on the dining table because Hua Cheng liked that.
Hua Cheng popped out of his room decked out in his favourite attire of red. Maroon-coloured shirt, scarlet pants, red overcoat, matched with black boots and decorated with accessories of silver.
"Chengzhu," Bai Wuxiang laughed. "No jewellery at school."
Hua Cheng pouted.
"Just one. Just one," he mumbled playing with his silver necklace with the flower pendant.
Bai Wuxiang nodded and tucked that one into his shirt but all the others had to come off.
The bangles, the anklets, the boot decorations, Bai Wuxiang hesitated at the earrings and only took off one, leaving the other of red and silver.
"Fine young man is ready for breakfast," Bai Wuxiang nodded, proud of his work.
He then realised that he could still hear Qi Rong screaming. That child had a pair of lungs on him.
"Hold that thought," he muttered and rushed up the stairs.
He had to use the spare key to open the bathroom door because just as he thought, He Xuan had fallen asleep inside the bathtub.
"Unbelievable," he cursed and turned the tap on, awakening the surprised child.
Qi Rong rushed inside the bathroom this time and Bai Wuxiang plopped him into the shower. Then he got busy bathing He Xuan. He Xuan finally came alive in the water, being no help at all and just splashing around with the bubbles as Bai Wuxiang washed him. Qi Rong played superhero in the shower and Bai Wuxiang had to go bathe him too. Fortunately, Qi Rong behaved.
He came out of the bathroom with two wet children, dripping from head to toe to find Hua Cheng had finished breakfast.
"Going to school now," Hua Cheng announced.
"Safe journey, Crimson Rain," Bai Wuxiang sighed as Qi Rong started kicking around annoyed and He Xuan kept trying to reach the fish on the table.
Bai Wuxiang dragged them back to their rooms and got Qi Rong dressed, at least He Xuan could put on his own damn clothes. Black Water didn't try to sleep again either now that he'd seen the food. He rushed over to the breakfast table and inhaled a good portion of the food.
Qi Rong of course screamed at him for eating like a pig.
Anyway.
Eventually, he was able to throw those two out the door, Qi Rong following loudly after He Xuan.
He didn't particularly care if they went to school as long as they got out of his house, to be honest.
Next the laundry.
It was done by now so he sorted through the clothes. Then he did the dishes and collapsed unto the couch.
In the future, he swore to never have kids. This was ridiculous.
Since they were getting paid to live like this he had no need to go to work and no desire to get bossed around by someone whose marriage was falling apart.
So he just curled up on the couch and tried to watch some TV.
As luck would have it there was a little perfect boy on screen. He was praised as the little prince of the town because he was perfectly behaved, number one in his class, woke up when he was supposed to and was the sweetest angel in existence.
"It's all thanks to the love from my parents," the young boy said into the camera with a big happy smile. "I believe with every child can be just like me if their caretakers worked hard enough to give them the best. Body in Abyss Heart in Paradise!"
Bai Wuxiang wanted to punch the fucking screen.
"I'm going to kill that little runt one day," he growled with a dark smile.