Chapter Text
They were hardly heroes. Vigilantes at best and a trio of teenagers running around the city in costumes at worst, but they still did their best to help citizens in need. Sometimes, Tommy figured they were the citizens in need.
Ranboo had always said that the best way they could help was doing the lame work none of the top heroes bothered with, like convenience store robberies and cats stuck in trees. The stupid, basic, easy stuff.
Tonight’s plan was hardly basic or easy, but it sure was stupid. Tommy could hardly believe it was his dumb idea to break into syndicate headquarters. It was one thing to go after just any supervillain but these guys were something else.
“We ready to go boys?” Tubbo was decked out head to toe from x-ray goggles to anti-gravity boots and miniature nukes shoved wherever he could fit them. He was not to be messed with, especially since Tubbo had drafted the whole plan himself, and it was a damn good one.
“I’m ready. Tommy?” Ranboo was dressed in all black like a weirdo on some spy mission. The only real color on him was his eyes and faint purple particles from his last time teleporting.
“I’m all good, boob boy.” Tommy himself was dressed in a red and white jumper, with holes cut in the back for his wings, similar to Tubbo’s. He had packed some ropes and harnesses, but most important of all, the bag.
The final part of their master plan was stealing a stolen artifact from the syndicate. Then they could turn it in to the hero association and be named real heroes. And all they had to do was get a silly little stone or something in a bag.
Easy peasy.
—————————————-
So apparently it wasn’t as easy peasy as Tommy thought it would be. The trio stood at the present moment outside a nondescript office building.
“This cannot be the place!” Tubbo shouted, tugging on the door with all his might.
Tommy countered, “Of course it is. There’s a fucking keypad by the door. Only rich assholes and supervillains have keypads by the doors!” Naturally, he was tugging on the other door, which also wasn’t budging.
“Guys..”
“Yeah? Well this is an office building, maybe they are rich assholes! This is why I don’t trust you with directions Tommy.” Tubbo bit back, but Tommy was not having any of it.
“Yeah? Oh yeah bitch? This was your plan, you should have the directions, and the keys, and all this other shit planned out. This isn’t my fault!”
“Guys….”
“Well it sure isn’t my fault, because I specifically asked you to find the directions!”
“Guys!”
“How am I supposed to find the directions to a place that might not even exist!”
“GUYS!”
Tubbo and Tommy stopped their tugging and arguing and looked at an exasperated Ranboo. He opened his mouth, ready to speak, closed it and sighed. Suddenly he disappeared from Tommy’s vision only to end up opening the door from the other side.
“I totally forgot you could do that boo.” Tubbo conceded, walking through the now open door.
Ranboo sighed again. “You always do.”
———————————————
The inside was surprisingly as expected. It looked like a normal office building, not exactly abandoned but not lively either, thankfully not a soul in sight. To be fair, it was past midnight.
It was a nice lobby, but there was only one exit in the back, heading to a hallway and presumably elevators. Ranboo and Tubbo had already started marching toward that hall, so Tommy quickly ran after them.
“We’re not splitting up, right?”
“Of course not boo, that would be really dumb.” And for some strange reason Tuboo decided to glare daggers at him. Rude.
The group arrived at the landing and Tommy’s fingers hovered over the buttons. “Which way boys? Up or down.”
“I say down. Villain lairs tend to be underground, that’s kind of their thing.”
“Fair enough Tubster.” He pressed the down arrow and an elevator dinged not a second later.
“Not very busy I guess.” Ranboo muttered, eliciting a chuckle out of Tubbo. Tommy scanned the buttons for a moment. There was only 1 floor beneath the lobby.
“Guess this is our first stop boys!” He pressed the button and without a second warning the elevator shot down.
—————————————
Everyone was screaming, well everyone was an exaggeration because there was only three people there but Tubbo screamed loud enough to be at least 10 little girls.
“What the HELL is going on!” Ranboo shouted above the screeching gears.
“How the fuck would I know!” Tommy screamed back.
Suddenly the death machine elevator halted to a stop and the trio went crashing to the floor.
“Owwwww”
“Oh shut it Tubbo you had the shortest fall out of all of us.”
“Prick.”
Ranboo stood up first, pulling the squabbling pair up with him. “Not the time guys, not the time.
As the doors opened, Tommy couldn’t help but stare forward in awe at what looked like an endless hallway.
“Totally the entrance to a supervillain lair. I love being right.”
Ranboo looked peeved. “Stop being so smug, that’s my thing.”
The hall looked like space incarnate, with seemingly no walls, ceiling, or end. Only glittering stars and an illuminated path across.
Tubbo took the first step but Tommy held him back. “Wait. What if there are booby traps?”
“Shit, you’re totally right king.” Tubbo retracted his step as Tommy spotted a strange pattern on the floor. Or, not a pattern…
“I see it. There’s like, tripwire going across the whole floor.” The lines zigzagged all the way down like a laser maze in a shitty james bond rip-off.
Tubbo let out a relieved breath. “If that’s all thank goodness.”
“What do you mean Tubster?”
“We can just fly over it, and Ranboo can teleport, this is like, so simple.”
And he was right. Wow, this was gonna be way easier than expected. Tommy took a cocky step forward like an idiot and his foot sank into a tile.
Another trap. Damnit.
Tommy could hear a hissing noise coming from behind, not like the snake hissing but like a flat tire. That could only mean one thing and a quick glance around confirmed gas was being released into the room.
“Tommy, what did you do?” Ranboo sniffed the air. “That gas better not kill us or you’re dead.”
“I know, I know, but we gotta go.”
“No shit Tommy!”
Tubbo and Tommy took off while Ranboo stood behind. They had only gotten about a second in before Tommy realized he was a grade A dumbass and they were caught in a tangle of tripwire.
Tommy was suddenly upside down and disoriented. “Shit! I’m sorry big man, I had no idea they were in the air.”
“Of course they’re in the air, where else would they be?” Tubbo huffed, faring much better than him.
“I’m gonna come help you guys!”
Tommy wished he could facepalm as Ranboo took one leap and got tangled with the other two.
“Dumbass”
“I know.”
The gas was getting thicker, spreading towards the other end of the hall, if that end so existed. ‘So this is how we die’ Tommy had thought as he slowly felt his limbs get heavier and his head get lighter, until his mind faded to nothing.
————————————
“Hello little birdy”
Tommy was confused. He was pretty sure he didn’t recognize that sickly sweet voice. His head was pounding and he felt simultaneously awake and tired. He blinked a few times, only to be met with a masked face he’d seen before somewhere.
“Finally awake? I’ve been waiting forever and your friends are still out cold.”
Oh. Tommy recalled where he had last seen that face. A news article about the syndicate, which made sense, as he just remembered that that was whose base he had broken into. And now Tommy, hanging upside down in a tangle, found himself face to face with the one and only Siren.
Fuck.
He panicked, twisting himself every which way and confirming what Siren said, Ranboo and Tubbo were still out. So it must have been some kind of sleeping gas, great. Thankfully, Tommy didn’t see any other syndicate members, but that didn’t mean they weren’t there.
Siren grinned. “Oh don’t panic little birdy. Just hang in there, hah, hang.”
“Fuck you, bitch.”
The bitch had the audacity to laugh. “Oh you wound mean. Lemme guess? This wasn’t supposed to happen. You and your crew of nobodies were going to march in, steal some shit and just leave. Ha. That’s a good one.”
“Let us go, asshole!” Tommy added some struggling for dramatic effect.
Siren closed in, whispering a little to close to Tommy’s face for his liking. “Not yet little birdy, we have much to discuss.”
And if that wasn’t ominous as fuck he didn’t know what was.