Chapter Text
Having a crush sucked ass.
Well, for Changkyun. Because, for some reason, he had to crush on that guy. You know, the good looking and popular guy. The one he couldn’t even get close to. The crush that didn’t even know he existed. And of course, said crush was a senior whereas Changkyun was just a little freshman. So, really, there was absolutely no chance of anything happening.
But there was still a little part of his brain that was whispering “maybe” and a little bit of hope in his heart.
The funniest thing about teenagers was probably their capacity to make themselves believe what they wanted to be true. Or was that tragic?
Changkyun had started high school two months ago, and developed his crush two weeks in. He found out his crush’s name three days later: Hoseok. The thing was, since they both went in the same school, their paths crossed often.
It was usually nothing. A glance, a smile, a door held.. A glance from Hoseok, which was probably just to check if anyone was in his way, became a glance toward Changkyun because maybe Hoseok thought he was cute. A smile from Hoseok to his friend who just said something funny, became a smile for Changkyun to show him Hoseok knew him and acknowledged him, and maybe even liked him back? A door held, which is just the polite thing to do for Hoseok, became a chivalrous act that, once again, maybe showed some kind of love, for Changkyun.
Changkyun knew he was seeing things where there weren’t any. They weren’t even friends. Hell, Hoseok didn’t even know he existed. So, Changkyun was moping about his non-existent love life, and Jooheon being the good friend he was, listened and patted his shoulder with a sympathy look on his face.
“Come on, Changkyun, cheer up a bit! I made a friend and we’re going to eat with him today!” Jooheon said while he all but dragged Changkyun to the cafeteria. Jooheon immediately walked up to a table occupied by two guys. One had black hair and an innocent look on his face and the other one had platinum blonde hair and a smile so big it looked like it was splitting his face in two.
“Hi Jooheon!” The blonde one said so loudly it was almost a shout and Changkyun flinched and took a step back. He should be used to it. After all he’s been friends with Jooheon for years now. But that guy was even louder and it took him by surprise. “Oh, sorry didn’t mean to scare you. Are you Jooheon’s friend?”
“Er.. Yeah. Changkyun, nice to meet you.” He held back the I guess, because first that was not very nice and second, it was Jooheon’s friend. They were friends for a reason.
“I’m Minhyuk and this is my friend Kihyun.”
And this, marked the day everything changed.
At first, he disliked Minhyuk. It was very childish but he disliked him because whenever he was there, Jooheon was talking with him, laughing with him, joking around with him, and that left Changkyun, sitting back awkwardly with a guy he didn’t know and not knowing how to pick up a conversation with said guy. Kihyun was nice. He had nothing against Kihyun. Yet, it was always awkward. No matter what they did or said, there was this weird aura between them. So Changkyun did the thing he knew best, retreat back in his shell and stop talking. He was just watching Jooheon, smiling sometimes but not actively taking part in anything.
They ate their lunch together every day. After a week, they also started walking home together. They would wait for each other in the morning. During the weekend, they would go out together, just hanging around, doing nothing in particular, just talking, sharing their lives and passions. They played basketball a lot in a park near their school and would often meet there after class, just to play a few games before going back home.
In barely two weeks, they had become a group of good friends. Even Changkyun, who seriously disliked Minhyuk, took a liking to the overexcited puppy. And the awkwardness between him and Kihyun was slowly, but surely, fading away.
Of course, that’s when Changkyun thought everything was going well and was relaxing around Minhyuk and Kihyun, that the latter decided to bring one of his friends in the group, disturbing the balance Changkyun had had trouble to create in the first place.
For the first time since he had met him three weeks ago, Kihyun was late. They always met in front of the cafeteria at five past noon. It was now fifteen past noon and he was nowhere to be seen so the three others decided to go in and eat since they had a class at one in the afternoon, and they couldn’t be late because the teacher was really strict and mean. As soon as they were seated, Kihyun stopped next to their table, with a guy shadowing him.
“Sorry guys I’m late, but I was trying to find Hyunwoo here.” He said as he pointed a finger to the tall guy standing behind him. Changkyun knew him. Well no, he did not know him, he recognized him. He had seen him many times hanging with Hoseok. That guy was in his senior year, what was he doing with Kihyun? “He’s my best friend.”
“Hi, nice to meet you. Kihyun has talked a lot about you.”
Changkyun really liked Hyunwoo. First, he was like a giant bear. Like, seriously, how could that guy be this huge but so soft at the same time. Not that an actual bear was soft or anything. Poke a bear and you’re his next meal. Poke Hyunwoo and he shares his meal. Second, he was really nice and caring, always paying attention to those around him and ready to give all he had for them. See the meal reference again. Third, he was quiet. And that, was a blessing. Because with Jooheon and Minhyuk who were screaming ninety percent of the time and Kihyun who, even not nearly as loud as them, revealed himself to be as energetic, the silence was an abstract notion. But since Hyunwoo arrived, whenever the three got too much, Hyunwoo and Changkyun would just go away from them and either study or read a book, sometimes they would talk.
Today was one of those days, they were all sitting inside when Minhyuk and Jooheon just ran off with Kihyun’s phone and Kihyun was running after them, trying to catch up. They ran out off the building.
“With all that snow, I bet you one of them will be sick by the end of the week.” Hyunwoo said and Changkyun could only agree. It would probably be Minhyuk since he easily got sick. “Probably Minhyuk. This kid gets sick way too easily.” Changkyun smiled when he heard Hyunwoo echoing his thoughts. He went back to his maths homework and Hyunwoo went back to his book.
Not even three minutes had passed when they heard a loud crash and they were not surprised when they saw Minhyuk pinned on the floor, Kihyun sitting on him. Jooheon sat next to Changkyun and hid his face in his shoulder, Changkyun could hear he was out of breath.
“Hyunwoo, mind if I join your little kindergarten?”
Changkyun looked at the newcomer, and immediately wished he hadn’t. Standing in front of him was Hoseok. As beautiful as ever. The prettiest smile on his face. It felt like he was shining. It was like Changkyun had his own little sun. And the tip of his nose was red because of the cold. And oh God, this was the cutest thing Changkyun had ever seen. And he did his best to hide his reactions, he dropped his head low and pretended to work, when really he was just looking at Hoseok from the corner of his eye. Trying to take in his beauty, to remember every little detail he could notice. At one point, his eyes met Hoseok’s and he nearly died because his crush just looked at him.
Man, he was screwed.
When he thought he was screwed, he didn’t know how right he was. Because even though he had known Hyunwoo was one of Hoseok’s friends, he missed the most important thing. That is, Hoseok was Hyunwoo’s friend. Don’t you understand? Of course, they would want to spend time together.
Changkyun was Jooheon’s friend. Jooheon was Minhyuk’s friend and so, they hung out with him. And since Kihyun was Minhyuk’s friend, the four of them became friends. Obviously. And then, Kihyun also wanted to spend time with his best friend Hyunwoo so Hyunwoo was added to their group. But you couldn’t just rip Hyunwoo from his own friends, so Hoseok and Hyungwon, another one of his friends, were added into the mix. And there. Seven guys. Changkyun was near his crush nearly every day. His heart couldn’t take it anymore. His brain was melting. Brilliant. Great. All this thanks to Jooheon.
A few weeks went by and Hoseok and Hyungwon had spend many free periods with them. Changkyun had mixed feeling. He didn’t know if he wanted to thank Jooheon for giving him so many opportunities to be close to his crush, or strangle Jooheon for giving him so many opportunities to be close to his crush. Oddly enough, Changkyun had yet to say a word to Hoseok. Whenever Hoseok tried to talk him, he would turn into a stuttering and blushing mess, giving up after a few seconds of struggle and choosing to look at his feet and stay silent. Others explained that he was a shy and reserved kid, uncomfortable around new people. Changkyun felt guilty about this whole ordeal and forced himself to actually say hello or answer when he was asked if he was okay.
Pathetic.
Changkyun was sitting at his desk and Jooheon was on his bed. They had a project in literature. The teacher gave the work three weeks earlier, but they kept postponing it. And here they were, nineteen hours from the due date, trying to do something that would give them a decent grade. Changkyun was still trying, Jooheon was just staring ahead of him, a blank look on his face.
“You should tell him, you know.” Jooheon broke the silence.
“Hm? And what do I say?”
“What you feel.”
“Sure.” Changkyun snorted, dropped his pen and turned toward his friend. “He’s gonna kick me so hard, I’ll end up on the moon.”
“What? No, he would never do that.”
“Come on, think about you’re saying. Tell him what I feel? I’ll just go like Hi Sir, I haven’t done the assignment because I felt deeply annoyed and unconcerned by what you said.”
“What the fuck are you on about?” Changkyun raised an eyebrow.
“The fucking project, what else?”
“You fucking donkey!” Jooheon got up and slapped Changkyun behind the head. “I was talking about Hoseok! Why would I want you to talk about your feelings to our teacher. Something’s wrong with you. You sure you have a brain in there?”
“How was I supposed to know?” Changkyun mumbled.
“So?”
“So what?”
“Are you going to tell him? You should just ask him out. I think he likes you. Like I don’t know, I just have this feeling.”
“Yeah, the same kind of feeling when you said this project would be easy and done in an hour uh?”
“Er.. I don’t know what you’re talking about. But anyway, I really think you should ask him out.”
The next day, at eight, Changkyun and Jooheon were in their literature class, ready to hand in their project. Changkyun was distracted. He kept replaying the conversation he had with Jooheon in his head. Maybe he could ask Hoseok? It wouldn’t hurt, right? What was the worse that could happen? Rejection? He could get over it, after all it was just a crush, not the love of his life or something. Sure during the last month, he had seen Hoseok a lot, though there was not much interactions between the two of them. Yes, Changkyun could ask him out. Yes, he would ask him out during the break.
The break came around way earlier than Changkyun thought and he was stressing out. Hoseok was putting his stuff in his locker. Changkyun and Jooheon were on the other side of the corridor.
“Come on, you’re a champion, go ask Hoseok out. You can do it.”
Changkyun nodded. He walked up to Hoseok and took a deep breath.
“Hey. Er.. So, we’ve known each other for a while now, and er.. I was wondering if you wanted to go on a date with me.”
Hoseok turned toward him with an eyebrow raised. He took off his headphones.
“Did you say something?”
Right at this instant, all the courage Changkyun had built up disappeared. He felt like crying but still gave him a pained smile.
“D-Do you have a pencil?”
“Oh. Yes, sure.” Hoseok opened his bag and handed a pencil to Changkyun. “Here you go.”
“Thanks.”
Changkyun walked away. As soon as he had rounded the first corner, he ran.