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Seven Ways to Skin a Catboy

Summary:

In hopes of kickstarting a reconciliation amongst the members of the RFA, V organises a friendly competition with a prize that holds a special place in the heart of every member. What starts as an ironic and harmless rivalry soon devolves into a journey of feline self-discovery, denial, and desperation. Just who will be crowned the winner at the end of this crazy ride?

And more importantly, who will escape with their dignity intact?

Notes:

I'm a little late to the fandom, oof... What was originally supposed to be a silly self-challenge somehow escalated into a huge multi-chapter plan (as all good things do).

Disclaimer– this fic is SFW, however characters will enter adult locations and discuss mature topics. I plan to touch on every ship, and will be updating with additional tags new chapters are posted!

Chapter 1: 1st DAY

Chapter Text

“We’re really doing this?”

“It would appear so,” Jumin held the cell phone to his ear with uncharacteristic sheepishness.

“Aight then, we both take a photo and on the count of three… we hit send.”

Forgetting momentarily that the silver-haired man on the other end of the line was incapable of visualising him, the corporate heir nodded meekly at Zen’s proposal. He added an appeasing hum of agreement after the fact, hoping to compensate for the mistake and betting entirely on the other’s failure to notice.

“Mm.”

Jumin released the press of his palm against the phone, quickly snapping a photograph of himself through the front-facing camera with an uneasy grip on the device. He grimaced at what he saw in his own reflection, but at least the deed was done. Fumbling, he brought the phone back to his ear just in time to hear Zen start to count down.

“Three, two… one.”

After a brief silence, the rich piano notes of the C&R text tone flooded his ear uncomfortably, a flash of white illuminating his face as the screen lit up with a picture of his dear Elizabeth the 3rd. Long fingers clumsily entered the passcode, navigating to the Association’s private messenger application with apparent haste. Any eyewitness would be mistaken for thinking he was actually eager to open Zen’s message. But that was surely not the case– no, not the prestigious and reputable Jumin Han. Whichever was the case, such accusations would remain purely hypothetical in the solitude of his penthouse apartment bedroom.

That’s when he saw it– piercing, red eyes… long, flowing, silky, grey hair… and those flawless, chiselled abs…

“M-my word…” Jumin stuttered through the phone, the heat just about audible in his breath.

He would never admit to anyone– not even himself– that the masculine figure drew his gaze more than femininity could ever hope to achieve. Coupled with the not-so-closely guarded secret of his feline fantasies, the sight that befell him was nothing short of heavenly. The fact that the subject of the image was none other than the cat-hating actor somehow made it all the more captivating to Jumin. A twinge of revenge and sick pleasure tickled immaturely at the older man’s insides. Zen was a model, it was true, but this was on a whole other level.

“Like what you see, eh?”

Jumin’s face burned insultingly. He traced a finger down Zen’s torso; captured immaculately in pixelated form. His gaze drew upward, admiring the black choker wrapped around his neck and the pair of snow-white cat ears blending seamlessly into his pale grey hair. His mind had long buried the initial purpose of their business transaction.

“I’ll take your silence as a ‘yes’. I fucking knew it. What did I tell y–”

“I was… merely admiring the similarities between you and Elizabeth the 3rd,” he lied. Jumin had a surprising talent in his ability to lie with a straight face and unwavering tonality. It was a skill that had served him well in his few, short years since entering the business sphere– even as far as being the difference resulting in successful deals with his company’s stakeholders on several occasions. Yet, caught off guard in the present while he donned similar, vulnerable attire, Jumin’s voice was unwittingly laced with emotion. This did not go unnoticed by his out-of-hours ‘business partner’, who thought it prudent to avoid commenting on the lack of conviction behind the man’s words.

“Yeh aight, whatever you say. I expect you to aH– achoo!” Zen sniffled through the phone in an almost theatrical manner before continuing, “… uphold your end of the deal too, yeah?” 

“Of course, but let it be known; failure to honour our agreement with regard to unlawful distribution would result in… unsavoury consequences for a young celebrity in the public eye.”

“Pssh geez, do you really think I’d be stupid enough to ignore the fine print of a trust fund kid’s contract?” Zen scoffed at the unnecessary threat.

The blurry photo popped up on his screen no sooner than the words left his lips. Zen groaned internally. Curse that jerk and his upper-class Wi-Fi. He contemplated the picture; still able to make out the young businessman’s sharp features despite his inproficient photography. He looked so… soft. Damn it, why did the word ‘cute’ come to mind? Surely it was just the divergence from his usual scowling face that made Zen think that way– right? He steeled his emotions, not wanting to make the same mistake as the other by hesitating for longer than was necessary.

“You scrub up… I guess,” he mumbled into the microphone, instinctively reaching up to feel the faux fur ears nestled between the long strands of his hair while red eyes rested on Jumin’s matching pair of an inverted shade. They were like night and day.

Zen sighed, quickly reminding himself of the purpose of this endeavour. Eyes on the prize, Hyun.

Rika’s Fundraising Association was holding a competition between its members; a photography competition, to be precise. After the overwhelming success and positive response garnered by the last party, V had made an unexpected return to the chatroom. Though not completely back to his usual self, it was more than refreshing to see the photographer’s username popping up more frequently.

V had returned with a proposal. The rules were simple– whoever can collect the most photographs depicting others in a cat costume would be declared the winner. Not easily swayed by the prospect of reward, Zen was not typically one to succumb to the thrill of competition. Yet, this constituted a different matter entirely. Just what was V thinking by promising the choice of location and theming for the RFA’s next prestigious party to the winner of a silly little contest?

No, Zen could not sit idly by while the more competitively-driven members of the association such as Jumin and Seven poured their all into winning– especially Luciel with his… unique prior experience. Heck, even Yoosung’s gaming and questionable online connections gave him a one-up over a regular guy like him. Zen simply could not risk the possibility of a cat-themed RFA function– no matter the cost to his time… or to his dignity.

“I should get back to rehearsing now. Don’t stay up too late looking at me, mkay jagiya~?” Zen hung up suddenly, denying the part of him that was scared to give Jumin the opportunity to respond. A low chuckle escaped his lips, contrasting heavily to the flirtatious ‘sing-song’ tone from moments earlier.

Jumin was so easy to tease, he could hardly resist.

Collection Achievement
Jumin Han [1]
ZEN [1]
707 [0]
Yoosung★ [0]
Jaehee Kang [0]
V [0]
Party Hostess [0]