Archive of Our Own

September 1, 2007

He had trained all summer for this journey. Two hours of flying nearly daily. While Taehyung’s never been a fan of flying, the training had been fairly pleasant. Today? A different story. Excruciatingly unpleasant.

Starting with spending all morning packing his life away. Discovering that flying two hours at a time did not really compare to the four hour journey. The burn in his inner thighs. The realization that protective eyewear would have gone a long way in the face of fickle winds. The fact that, even after landing, they still had a trek to do by foot.

The white birch forest was as beautiful as his parents had promised, granted. Still, he was utterly exhausted.

“But it’s far for Dawon-nuna and Hoseok-hyung, too. Why does it have to be here?”

He had one of his parents’ hands in each of his, the way they would walk together a long time ago. There was a possibility that his cousins would laugh at him, but in reality he barely knew them. Fifth cousins, who he had only ever interacted with at the big annual family gatherings and festivities.

His father squeezed his hand, swung their arms until Taehyung’s frustrated pout had melted into a smile.

“We have family members all across the country, teddy bear.”

“But we’re the only ones attending Hogwarts this year. Why can’t we meet halfway between Deogyusan and Mudeungsan?”

“It’s just tradition, baby. And when you come home for the winter break, the Wondaeri forest will look so beautiful that you'll forget to miss school!”

Taehyung let go of his father’s hand to circle both arms around his mother’s waist instead, digging his head into her side.

“I won’t ever miss it. I’ll miss home . All the time.”

He closed his eyes as his father ruffled his hair affectionately.

“The Hufflepuff quarters are perfect for you. Yellow everywhere, lots of sunlight, so many plant friends. And easy access to the kitchens.”

Taehyung pulled back from his mother, reached for the yellow jasper necklace his grandmother had given to his parents the day he was born. His father had once described the complexity of the charms cast on the necklace, all meant to protect him and lead him through a happy life. Yellow had been his favourite colour for as long as he could remember.

“But eomma and halmeoni’s food is my favourite,” he complained. His family made the best food, he was hardly tempted by the promises of boarding school food.

When his father reached for his hand, he quickly let go of the necklace and interlaced his fingers with both his parents again.

“You’ll be back in three months,” his mother reassured him in a low tone.

Taehyung looked down at his feet, uncertain but afraid that that had been sadness in her voice. The only thing worse than missing home was knowing that being away would make his parents sad, too.

“In how many sleeps is that?”

He listened to the crunch of the leaves beneath their feet as they moved further and further away from the muggle trails. It didn’t take long for his mother to give him an answer, thumb brushing the back of his hand as she softly replied.

“Only 110 sleeps. It’ll go by so quickly, bear.”

Up ahead, he heard Hoseok’s boisterous voice. He hurried his steps, until his father let go of his hand.

“Go ahead, we’ll catch up. Don’t forget to greet Dawon and Hoseok’s parents.”

Taehyung nodded, only half listening. He quickly swerved between birch trees, following his cousin’s voice until he found the portkey’s clearing. He knew his smile rivalled Hoseok’s when the other turned to greet him.

“Hyung!”

“Taehyung! So weird not to see you in robes!”

Taehyung puffed out his chest. He’d gone into a muggle store for the very first time to purchase the outfit. A bright yellow sweater with a black peter pan collar, and loose-fitting black slacks. His two year old brother had called him a bumblebee when he had first tried it on to show his father, who hadn’t accompanied him and his mother to the store. Two of them had already been enough to attract the scorn of muggles.

He assessed Hoseok in turn, tight looking yellow pants with yellow suspenders, and a baggy white shirt. Despite the muggle attire, Taehyung easily recognized Hoseok’s usual fashion sense. Taehyung dragged his eyes away, ready to see how Dawon adapted herself to muggle fashion. No matter the number of attendees at family events, Dawon was always the most fashionable, rumoured to have created her own set of spellwork to enchant robes to her exact liking.

Instead of Dawon though, the figure beside Hoseok belonged to none other than a boy with a gaze Taehyung could only describe as deadly.

Taehyung looked back at Hoseok immediately, feeling flustered. The boy’s eyes had been lined with black, his skin an impossible white compared to his heavy black clothes. Both the high laced boots and collar around his neck made Taehyung question whether the stranger wanted to stick out in the muggle crowd rather than slip through without harassment.

“Where’s nuna?” Taehyung asked in a much smaller voice than he’d used before.

“Oh, she’s doing her last year at Mahoutokoro.”

Taehyung’s mouth fell open. He had spent the better part of the last year begging his parents to send an application to Mahoutokoro. While the school’s location was quite far from mainland Japan, the thought of being in Japan seemed so much better than Scotland. And, in reality, Scotland was just about two entire continents away from his hometown. Mahoutokoro was probably around four times closer than Hogwarts was.

“Is that allowed…?”

“Mahoutokoro is a great school,” the boy next to Hoseok spoke evenly.

Taehyung glanced over momentarily, again crumbled under the dark gaze, and refocused on Hoseok.

“But, how?”

“Professor Kim went there, I guess he had contacts. They do really intense work on the student robes there, like they’re magicked to reflect your academic performance, wild stuff. And apparently she wants to design robes now.”

“I wish nuna could design my robes,” Taehyung mused, marvelling for a moment at her talent and drive, before realizing what that meant for him. “Wait, so, it’ll only be the two of us?”

“Well, in Hufflepuff. But we’ve also got hyung.” Hoseok extended both arms out towards the mystery boy.

“You know you don’t have to keep calling me hyung, we’re in the same year.”

“Are you in Slytherin?”

Distantly, Taehyung knew he sounded rude, but he didn’t regret the question. As far as he knew, his family was the one Korean wizarding family that consistently sent their children to Hogwarts, so he had never met anyone who’d graduated from Hogwarts but his family members. Which meant that he’d never met a Gryffindor, Ravenclaw, or Slytherin student before.

“That’s right.” The boy’s smile was slow and menacing at first, but as it grew it looked increasingly cuter, with the boy’s face getting rounder and his eyes scrunching shut. “I’m Min Yoongi, I guess Hoseok and I are kind of best friends.”

“Kind of? What do you mean kind of?” Hoseok acted playfully affronted, but Taehyung found himself smiling hesitantly. He hadn’t thought Hoseok would be best friends with someone outside of Hufflepuff. Especially not someone from Slytherin, not based on what his parents had told him. “Anyway, so you’ll have the two of us. But Professor Kim can help you too if anyone’s giving you a hard time, or if you need to speak in Korean.”

“Pardon?” Came a high, polite voice behind the two best friends. Taehyung tilted his head as Hoseok and Yoongi parted to reveal two other boys. “I couldn’t help but to overhear, but were you speaking of Kim Namjoon?”

The two new boys looked like twins, with the one having spoken up carrying a sleeping cat. The cat was mostly hidden from view, with only one orange and one black ear peeking out from the boy’s arms.

Taehyung looked around the clearing curiously, eager to know how many other Korean students he would travel with. He spotted his parents easily, vaguely recognized Hoseok’s parents, and felt uncertain about the last pair of adults. There were no other children in sight.

“Yeah! Our Herbology professor, he’s the coolest.”

Yoongi nodded along seriously before adding, “Are you two first years, too? So is Taehyung over here.”

Taehyung felt his face flush happily. He hadn’t even properly introduced himself, yet Yoongi had presented him as if he knew him well. Maybe interacting with children outside of his house wouldn’t be as bad as his parents had made it sound.

“I am. Park Jimin.” He promptly bowed, the boy slightly behind him hesitantly copying the motion. “This is my younger brother, Park Jihyun. Namjoon-hyung’s tutored us for years. He’s the reason I’m coming to Hogwarts. And Jihyun, too, in a couple of years.”

Taehyung pressed his lips together, fighting the urge to ask if Jimin was actually old enough to attend. Short and round-faced, he didn’t look a day older than his younger brother.

Fortunately, his parents called him over then, preventing him from any rude slip ups. He greeted his relatives, then met Jimin and Jihyun’s parents. As his father’s pocket watch approached six o’ clock, they gathered around the easel, just at the edge of the clearing. One of the better portkeys Taehyung had seen yet, as if a muggle had left their art supplies there to return to paint the white birch trees at a later date.

When the time came, Taehyung shut his eyes, held his breath, then reached out to the portkey. Leaving Korea for the very first time.

🐍🐍

With his trunk stowed away, Taehyung ventured further into the train wagon, head moving side to side as he considered each cabin he passed. His thoughts were mostly taken up with the image of his mother as she had cast the engorgio spell on the trunk. He’d watched avidly the featherlike threads her magic created as she had casted. A vision that had always fascinated him as a younger child and which he would terribly miss while away from home.

At least the extension charm his mother had cast on the trunk was still in place. He’d at least feel her magic while he’d unpack in the Hufflepuff dormitories.

He finally spotted Hoseok’s cabin, but did not miss Yoongi’s intimidating presence inside of it. Arms crossed and boots kicked up onto the seat facing his, Yoongi’s aura still felt glacial to Taehyung, who all but sped up to find a different cabin.

He hadn’t planned on stopping at Jimin’s mostly empty cabin, but the latter had waved at Taehyung enthusiastically when he’d passed by, smile sweet and aura at the very other end of the spectrum from glacial.

“Your cat sleeps a lot,” Taehyung observed from the doorway, noting how the cat had chosen to sleep on Jimin’s lap even though every other seat of the cabin was free.

“Byakko’s just nervous about the new environment.”

“Byakko, huh? You’re going to be so good at Astronomy.”

Jimin shrugged, petting behind Byakko’s ears when the cat roused with the repeated call of their name.

“That would be nice, but I don’t think the British curriculum cares at all about the four guardians. Not even sure I know enough English to pass the year…”

A familiar fear for Taehyung, who’d heard time and time again that studying English would be primordial to his magical education. Respectfully, Taehyung had always thought focusing on Latin would be more useful.

Compelled by Jimin’s familiar insecurities, Taehyung entered the cabin, settling in the seat facing him.

“I’m nervous, too. Just like Byakko.”

This time, Byakko meowed in acknowledgement, lifting their head and fixing Taehyung with a surprisingly deep blue stare. As it turned out, a calico cat.

Jimin nodded slowly. He didn’t have to acknowledge it for Taehyung to understand that he was worried, too.

“You must be kind of excited though, right?” Taehyung tried again, aiming to cheer the boy up.

Perfectly timed, the train’s whistle sounded, the locomotive slowly coming alive as it left the station. Taehyung was thankful that Jimin had chosen the side opposite the platform where his parents stood. He didn’t think he’d be able to watch their figures as they slowly grew further and further away.

“I suppose I’ll learn a lot…”

“And you’re going to find out your house!” Taehyung exclaimed, properly distracted again and feeling the trepidation on Jimin’s behalf. For Taehyung, it was something predetermined, for Jimin it would be an exciting revelation.

Jimin’s smile returned then.

“Ah, true. I suppose it doesn’t really matter to me which one it is, as long as I can win the House Cup.”

Taehyung felt his face go slack in surprise.

“What? Really? You don’t care?”

“I guess I’ve kind of been referring to them in my mind by their colours. Looks like the biggest distinction to me. I reckon you must have your eyes set on the yellow house.”

Incredibly pleased, Taehyung sat taller and put his hands over his hips.

“That’s right! I’m heading straight to Hufflepuff!” Byakko was fully awake now, as if sensing Taehyung’s mounting excitement. “Yellow’s also my favourite,” he added in afterthought.

Jimin nodded, smiled, and then his hair promptly went from its pitch black to a honey blonde.

“Woah!” Taehyung let out, looking for Jimin’s wand but noting instead that Jimin had pulled the trick off wandlessly.

Jimin chuckled, looking pleased.

“I can change stuff like that, about myself. I’ve always done it. There’s a name for it, but… it’s hard to pronounce,” he concluded with a grimace.

“Oh, yes!” Taehyung let out in recognition, impressed to witness the rare magical ability. “Meta… morph…” He stopped there, also finding it difficult.

Thankfully, Jimin completed it with a kind smile, “Magus.”

They both nodded at one another avidly. Byakko, seemingly bored, hopped from Jimin’s lap to Taehyung’s, and Taehyung held the cat close to his chest right away.

“So, is it to your liking? Yellow enough?” Jimin pointed towards his hair.

“It’s beautiful! I hope you come to Hufflepuff with me. Or at least Gryffindor. Because you’d really stick out with blue or green hair. You’d stick out as much as Yoongi-ssi!”

They laughed together, Jimin reaching over to pet Byakko as they curled up onto Taehyung’s lap.

“He’s kind of scary, huh?”

“Terrifying. I hear all the other Slytherins are the same.”

They fell into relative silence, watching the landscape roll by outside of the window. Taehyung could only endure that for so long, the foreign scenery accentuating his rapidly climbing homesickness.

“I hope we can be together in Hufflepuff though,” he told Jimin, looking away from the window, but not quite meeting his companion’s eye.

“Oh, yes. That would be nice. Even though blue is my favourite.”

“Like Byakko’s eyes.”

“She is quite beautiful, but I think I like it best because I live on Geoje Island. I’ll miss seeing the ocean so much…”

“I’ve never been,” he commented, thinking of his own home. Of Deogyusan, its tall trees, countless hills, and the potency of the mountain’s magic when the blanket of snow settled over it every winter.

“You should come over during vacation!” Jimin offered, excitable.

Conversation continued, Taehyung finding Jimin endlessly fascinating, and Byakko’s body a warm distraction from the great distance separating him from his family.

The ride to Hogwarts felt mysteriously shorter than his flight to the Wondaeri forest had.

🐍🐍

They only separated once they were made to stand in an alphabetical line — all forty or so new students waiting to be sorted. Taehyung thought it was a shame, because he had sensed from Jimin’s curious looks that he didn’t have the faintest idea how the sorting ceremony worked or what the battered, old-fashioned hat was doing in the centre of it all.

Taehyung quickly let it go. He knew that Jimin would either be sorted into Hufflepuff, in which case they would become close friends, or he would be sorted into a different house. Either way, he couldn’t wait to find out who his classmates and roommates would be.

The line advanced slowly, and Taehyung honestly wished he could skip this part. He wondered if Jimin felt as portkey lagged as he did. As the minutes dragged, he kept his eyes on the Hufflepuff table, where Hoseok was waving at him cheerfully, and daydreamed of the moment where he could sit down, fill his stomach, then head straight to his new bed.

Finally, he reached the front of the line. He didn’t react at first, unused to hearing his name as “Taehyung Kim”. And then, at last, he was taking a seat before the entire school, quickly returning yet another eager wave from Hoseok. He shut his eyes, relaxed, still thinking of how well he would sleep when the day finally ended.

Silence from the sorting hat.

Taehyung was already thinking of the letter he would write home, how the sorting hat had thought the sorting so obvious that he hadn’t even breathed a word to Taehyung while deliberating, when suddenly:

“Slytherin!”

He didn’t open his eyes at first, didn’t think anything really. The silence that had stretched before the sorting only perduring. The only difference, the only hint giving away the fact that a word had been uttered at all, was the tightening of his stomach. Like someone had pointed at Taehyung’s stomach and had cast the incarcerous spell.

The weight was lifted from his head and his eyes fluttered open. He felt unseeing as his eyes adjusted to the candlelit hall.

The next student was approaching the stool. He hopped off, but stood still as he struggled to understand the sight before him. He took a step forward, but then stopped, something irking at the back of his mind, telling him that that wasn’t quite right. He tried to spot Hoseok in the crowd, but it looked more like a faceless mass now. Someone directed him elsewhere, and then he was making his way to a prefect, at the far right of the hall.

He couldn’t discern the faces of anyone at that table either. But when he sat down, finally just as he’d been fantasizing about, reality hit him with finality.

He hadn’t been sorted into Hufflepuff. A millennia of his family being part of Hufflepuff, sans exception, and he hadn’t made it. A lifetime of imagining his school years and his future all centered around continuing family tradition, shattered.

Shock gripped him, skin growing clammy and sleepiness leaving his body altogether. Not only had he failed to follow family tradition, he had been sorted into Slytherin . The very antithesis of Hufflepuff. Slytherins, the likeliest to cut corners, to throw away relationships to achieve self-serving goals. Taehyung felt faint.

He thought of returning in line — perhaps no one would notice? He would just ask for a second try. Perhaps it had been the portkey lag playing tricks on the sorting hat. He just needed to get back there, focus his thoughts this time instead of thinking of finally sleeping.

He stood up, just in time for a short body to knock into his.

“We did it!”

Jimin’s voice, in his native language, helped restore more of Taehyung’s sense of reality.

“We did it?”

He cleared his throat, afraid to show to the students around him — who no doubt would prey on him if he showed weakness — that he felt shattered.

“We made it into the same house!” Jimin pulled back, smiling excitedly. “Like my new eyes?”

Jimin batted his blonde eyelashes a few times, highlighting the change in colour to his eyes. One a brilliant green, the other a sharp silver. Slytherin colours.

“Woah,” Taehyung tried to sound as amazed as he had on the train earlier, but heard it fall flat. His reaction didn’t seem to deter Jimin, who stepped over the bench to take a seat.

“I kept the blonde, for you. I mean, it sucks we didn’t get our favourite colours. But we can decorate our room with blue and yellow, right? It’s going to be awesome.”

Like the panic Taehyung felt could be reduced to missing out on dorms in his favourite colour. Like it wasn’t the ultimate betrayal to his bloodline and the people he loved the very most, loved with his entire heart.

Fortunately, the conclusion of the sorting meant that Taehyung didn’t need to come up with an answer. That no one would judge him for staring blankly at the headmistress as she welcomed them to the new school year. No one would know he hadn’t listened, that his eyes had been unseeing as he’d played out every scenario of delivering the news to his parents.

He only tuned back in for Jimin’s intermittent comments when he leaned into his space. He shrugged with a bashful smile whenever Jimin asked what a word or sentence meant in Korean. Taehyung couldn’t help, he wasn’t catching a single word of the speech.

When dishes were finally served, Taehyung had forgotten to feel hungry at all. Instead of a set of chopsticks next to a spoon, the kitchens magicked a fork to their left, a knife to their right, with a delicate spoon — clearly intended for dessert, not for rice — behind their plates. Taehyung desperately wanted to go home. Maybe he could ask for another year to ready himself for school. Another year to spend entirely as a child. During which he could focus on his family’s core values. Integrity, loyalty, honesty, humility, generosity, friendliness, altruism, hard work.

He came back to himself when Jimin started serving him, filling up his plate with the different options set before them.

“Oh, sorry, you didn’t have to…”

Jimin paused his movement, watched Taehyung with some kind of warm expression from the corner of his eyes before depositing the spoonful of rice pilaf into the plate.

“Your mind was busy, that’s ok. We have to try everything now so we can monopolize our favourite dishes the next time.”

Despite that edge in the desire to stake their claim over their favourites, Jimin appeared so Hufflepuff-like to Taehyung. Thoughtful of someone who he’d only just met, looking out for their best interest without ulterior motive. And his smile looked so shy but pleased, as if he were grateful to have met Taehyung.

Taehyung took a deep breath. If a fellow Slytherin met his family’s values, perhaps Taehyung wasn’t doomed.

“What if they never serve these kinds of dishes again?”

Jimin furrowed his eyebrows, exaggeratedly turning his head right and left.

“Really? Felt like they put out every single possible menu item. Seems excessive.”

Taehyung laughed then. It still felt like it got caught in his throat, as if the airway had tightened up with emotion and did not want to give any space to something light and airy like joy. Nevertheless, the smile he gave Jimin was genuine.

He’d even pecked at a few of the options Jimin had scooped into his plate by the time Hoseok arrived at their table — not anywhere the ravenous appetite he’d had back in the line, but an improvement from the world ending feeling that had taken over his body before Jimin had been able to join him.

“Hey, you two ended up together.”

Taehyung set his utensils down, wondered for the tenth time in as many minutes whether he could ask his parents to send him a few sets of chopsticks, perhaps his favourite ones. Even though everyone at the Slytherin table would eventually catch on that they were all a variation on the colour yellow. When he turned to greet Hoseok, he was surprised to find Yoongi standing next to him, expression excited and happy.

“I’m so happy,” Jimin expressed next to him.

Taehyung turned to him, assessed him fully for the first time since the sorting. He looked in much higher spirits than he’d had in the Hogwarts Express. Both his heart soared and his gut sunk, realizing that his presence had that much of an impact on Jimin — thrown into an environment he didn’t seem entirely prepared for — but that he hadn’t thought of the possibility at all until just now. Maybe his selfish thoughts were reason enough for his sorting.

“Ah, this is lovely. The house of Slytherin is brimming with Korean pride,” Yoongi declared with a strangely formal tone and a note of laughter hanging in his every word, as if this were a reference to a private joke with Hoseok.

Hoseok, on the other hand, crossed his arms over his chest, mood clearly stormy.

“With Nuna gone, Taehyung was supposed to stabilize our numbers in Hufflepuff. What the hell…”

With a returning sense of panic, Taehyung hopped off the bench.

“Hyung, can I talk to you alone?”

He ignored Jimin’s wide-eyed look, the Slytherin colours made all the more obvious with the expression. He dragged Hoseok off by the sleeve of his robe, ignored him when he pointed to a spot in the Great Hall, and dragged him out of the room altogether.

Night had already fallen, and without the thousands of candles floating in the Great Hall, the school was dark, almost gloomy.

At home, his parents’ magic illuminated their entire house, always accompanying him in the dark.

“Taehyung, it’s okay,” Hoseok spoke lowly once they’d come to a stop. He looked concerned.

“Everyone else in the family…”

“You’re the first. That doesn’t mean the only one ever. Just the first.”

“You can’t tell anyone in our family.”

Taehyung stared down at his boots, realizing he had given an order to his elder. It had been a snap decision though. The scenarios where his parents’ hearts broke at the news still at the forefront of his mind. There wasn’t a single happy scenario. Not one where his parents were proud. Only some where they offered him half-hearted comfort as disappointment crushed them.

“Don’t worry, I’m not going to announce it for you. You can do it on your own terms. And, hey, if you need help composing the letter to them, I can help. Or hyung, he’s a great writer.”

“No, hyung. You can’t ever tell them. Ever.”

He kept his eyes downwards as he spoke, voice trembling.

There was a tense moment of silence, and then: “Come on, chin up. You’re not really going to keep this a secret, it’s really not that bad…”

“I’ve been waiting my whole life to join Hufflepuff,” he choked out, honest. “This is horrible. And if eomma and appa find out… it’s going to be even worse.”

Hoseok rested his hands over his shoulders, offered a gentle squeeze that had Taehyung’s bottom lip wobbling.

“You’ve been waiting your whole life to join Hogwarts . I promise the experience isn’t different based on houses. And I would know all about the Slytherin experience, ok? I’ve heard every single detail from hyung. Not that different from my experience.”

Except both of Taehyung’s parents, all of his grandparents, they were all part of a group that had just rejected Taehyung. They all shared a bond that Taehyung had always imagined that he shared, too. A life-defining characteristic that he had never questioned.

“If it’s not different, then they won’t suspect anything, right?”

There was a concerned sigh from Hoseok, but it only lasted for a brief moment. He gave another squeeze to Taehyung’s shoulders before letting go.

“Your secret is safe with me. No sharing with the family. But, if you’re ready one day, or if you’re trying to be ready, you can lean on me. I’ll be there to support you. You’re still my cute little cousin, just now you’re my cute little Slytherin cousin, one of a kind.”

Taehyung forced a smile, chanting Hoseok’s earlier words in his mind to counteract the effect of “one of a kind”. Just the first one, not the only one.

They returned to the Slytherin table to find that Yoongi had taken Taehyung’s spot. Jimin stumbled over a rush of words at the sight of Taehyung.

“I’m so sorry! I protected your food from Yoongi-ssi, but then… it was so awful. All these desserts showed up, and all your food was gone!”

“Tried to tell him. Still wouldn’t let me eat from your plate though. Had to eat without a plate, like an animal.”

“You’ll survive, you drama queen.”

Taehyung cringed, couldn’t imagine ever calling Yoongi a drama queen like Hoseok had, or anything other than his name, really. He hadn’t seen his upperclassman handle a wand yet, but he had no doubt that he already knew how to unleash a world of wrath through magic.

Despite the unamused look Yoongi settled on Hoseok, he was quick to move off the bench and gesture for Taehyung to take back his seat. Taehyung hurried to follow the instruction, offering a quick smile to Jimin.

“Don’t worry, I was full.”

“Glad to have you both in Slytherin. Going to head back so I can eat my Berliner from an actual plate.”

Yoongi leaned over Taehyung to grab a white-powdered doughnut with the words.

“And remember what I said, Taehyung. I support you,” Hoseok said as parting words.

Taehyung nodded hurriedly, pretended to focus his attention on the dessert selection before them until both seniors had left them be.

In reality, all desserts — not only the so-called Berliner — looked extremely foreign and unappetizing to Taehyung, who was yearning for his parents’ comfort. He crossed his arms over the table, sighing deeply.

To his surprise, Jimin was quick to sympathize.

“Yeah, dinner wasn’t that great either. Do you think they’ll ever make us Korean food?”

“Guess we’ll have to wait for the breaks to get that,” Taehyung answered, feeling listless.

He was surprised to realize that the idea of vacation now filled him with dread instead of longing. How would he face his parents with this heavy secret weighing down on his chest? Suddenly, 110 nights felt like a sentence rather than a promise.

🐍🐍

Taehyung was sleeping in a dungeon. The only trace of yellow his canary-coloured night-gown. No sunlight, instead the green glow from the Black Lake, submerging their entire dormitory and common room. Certainly no plant friends or the promised mouthwatering perfumes of nearby kitchens. The furnishings of the Slytherin space were austere, coldly sophisticated. The opposite of the warmth Taehyung had always imagined for himself.

He’d dropped the curtains of his four-poster bed, but his silencio charm had failed. Despite growing up in a magical home, he’d hardly ever practiced his spell-casting, waiting instead for the day his official magical education would begin. In an upset state, casting any magic at all for Taehyung felt borderline impossible. So, he cried silently. The bed was much bigger, comfier, more luxurious than the one he had at home, but that was hardly a consolation. As he stayed awake in the dark, his mind kept busy by replaying those rapidly growing number of scenarios where his parents rejected him, maybe even disowned him.

It was unexpected when Byakko leapt onto the bed, landing right in front of him. He wasn’t sure how she had gotten inside of his curtains, perhaps she had crawled underneath them. She was quick to butt the top of her head underneath his chin and to burrow close to his chest. In that moment, she was Taehyung’s one beacon of warmth. He didn’t waste any time in holding her closer.

He still cried, still thought numbly of how his parents might react, but the force of her purring against his chest was soothing, something to anchor himself with.

Perhaps it was that deep focus on both his despair and the cat’s presence that had kept him from picking up on Jimin’s calls of Byakko’s name. Certainly, he was not prepared for Jimin to draw the curtains back, peering inside curiously.

“Hey, have you seen — oh ! There she is!”

In a moment of panic, Taehyung squeezed his eyes shut, feigning sleep. He felt Byakko lift her head, purring pausing, and then her settling back against him, purring louder than before.

There was some shuffling noise, as if Jimin were moving the curtains, and then retreating footsteps. Quickly, Taehyung wiped at his cheeks, attempting to dry his silent tears. It was fortunate that he had, as Jimin returned within moments, this time shutting the curtains behind him and casting silencio with much greater confidence than Taehyung had managed.

“What’s wrong?”

Jimin stood rigidly between the mattress and curtains, wand in hand. Taehyung sat up, sensing that Jimin didn’t know if he was welcome or not. A true Hufflepuff was always welcoming.

“I’m ok… Do you want to sit?”

Jimin seemed extra cautious as he climbed onto the bed to face Taehyung, legs dangling off the mattress as if he were consciously not letting any bare skin touch Taehyung’s beddings.

“Is it the dark? I don’t really know many light creation spells, I can only do lumos. But I could always cast it and stay here until you fall asleep…?”

Again, Taehyung thought of the constant magical lights back home. He frowned deeply, stretching his legs out when Byakko tried to climb onto his lap.

“No, the dark is ok. Besides, there’s the spooky green light if I open my curtains.”

“I knew these house things were all about the colour!” It was said with a bright smile that softened somewhat when Taehyung wasn’t able to meet it with one of his own.

“Maybe.”

“Are you scared? It’s a little scary. I like the water though, like we’re at a giant aquarium. Have you ever been to an aquarium? I like the one in Busan.”

Taehyung’s frown deepened even more so. He wondered if Jimin was trying to distract him with the rapid-fire pace.

“It’s not that I’m scared. I just don’t want to be here.”

Jimin reached out to pet behind Byakko’s ears, her purring picking up once more.

“I know what you mean. I wish I could just learn magic at home. I know I could, but our parents are probably right that it’s better this way. Our skills will be way better.”

Jimin had misunderstood. Of course, home was his favourite place. But he’d still wanted to attend Hogwarts, just not in a house other than Hufflepuff.

“Guess I’m just a little homesick.”

Not an outright lie, just not the truth.

“Do you want a hug?”

Taehyung took a moment to process that. Another gesture from Jimin that felt so unlike the tales of Slytherin he had been told. Cold, manipulative, deceiving. Not the kind of people Taehyung would have expected to offer him a hug.

“I don’t want to bother Byakko though…”

As if his shyness had evaporated, Jimin brought his legs onto the bed and crawled towards the head, gestured for Taehyung to lay down.

“Come on, I’ll hold you like my eomma does. She gives the best hugs.”

“Ok,” Taehyung complied unsurely.

Jimin’s kind of embrace was unexpected. With Taehyung’s head over his lap, and Jimin’s arms wrapped loosely over his torso to rest his hands lightly over his sternum. He did wonder, however, if the gesture was infused with some type of ancient, wandless magic. Because, despite his determination to not cry in front of the other Slytherins, Taehyung’s tears had returned, rolling painlessly down his cheeks as he closed his eyes and let himself feel the full impact of his disappointment.

Byakko was still purring, pawing at Taehyung’s knees, and Jimin’s words had a similarly soothing effect.

“Don’t worry, I’m here.”

Like well practiced words Jimin must have heard from his mother throughout his entire childhood.

Unexplainably, Taehyung managed to fall asleep just like that.

The next morning, when he woke to find Jimin next to him, still over the covers, and when he’d finally managed to shake Jimin awake, Jimin had drowsily opened his silver and green eyes. And Taehyung found that the Slytherin colours were maybe quite pleasant after all. Maybe there had been a reason he had been sorted into the same house as Jimin.

The feeling faded as he got ready for their last day before classes begun at last, pulling his yellow jasper necklace to rest over his robes. The weight of his family’s impending disappointment had not disappeared.

January 3, 2009

“So, we use this sticking charm I varied, and we cast it on everything hyung owns, and then anything he touches when he comes back will just stick to him until he’s just totally smothered and he gets mad.”

“Hyung would never get mad,” Taehyung argued back, putting up the usual resistance he did whenever Jimin proposed a new prank to play on Yoongi.

Yoongi’s patience was endless. His reactions to their pranks always hilariously absent. This tended to backfire on them, especially when they would tamper with his food. Testing Yoongi’s plate once he’d left the Slytherin table to figure out whether they had failed their charms, only to taste the terrible concoction that Yoongi had eaten wordlessly.

Even though Taehyung had grown to idolize Yoongi, begging Jimin to sit in his cabin when they’d returned for their second year at Hogwarts, Jimin suspected that he was still somewhat fearful of their upperclassman. Despite his calm and kind demeanour, Yoongi’s goth-inspired fashion still clung to the way he wore the school uniform, and his eyes remained piercingly intimidating. Jimin was mostly over it, mostly wanted to see Yoongi lose his cool, thus he had dragged Taehyung to the fourth year dormitory on their last day before the other students were due to return from the winter holidays.

“But imagine if he did, and if he did while he couldn’t unstick his pillow, his bed sheets, his journal, basically everything here, from his body. It’s going to be hilarious. The best way to kick off the new term.”

“What if he actually suffocates?”

“Odds are, he’s going to touch something with his hand first. If he presses his face against something after the first thing he touches sticks to his hand… It’s sad to say, but that might just be Darwinism at its finest.”

“Darwinism?”

Taehyung’s eyebrows were cutely furrowed. Jimin, with a sigh, gestured for him to pull his wand out. Enough lallygagging, there was a lot he wanted to do before the entire student population was upon the castle grounds again.

“Really? I know I said we’re taking Arithmancy and Ancient Runes next year, but I’m going to have to tutor you on Muggle Studies even if we don’t take it.”

“Whatever,” Taehyung grumbled, wand finally brandished out towards Yoongi’s corner of the room. “There’s so much magic in your bloodline that you’re a metamorphmagus. As if you didn’t know even fewer muggles than I do.”

Jimin clicked his tongue.

“Not true. Muggles love the beach, I see them all the time. What kind of muggle would venture deep into the forest where your family is? Only the ones who’ve gone mad I bet.”

“Whatever.” Taehyung sounded alarmingly less amused, a sudden shift in his mood. “You going to give me instructions or what?”

Jimin hesitated. He wondered if Taehyung was worried about third year electives. Or perhaps it was truly the prospect of Yoongi finally snapping at their antics. Or, the likeliest, it had been the mention of his family. He knew his best friend well enough to know he’d never stopped feeling homesick. He suspected it was the reason Taehyung skipped out on any opportunity to head home for holidays and long weekends. In first year, when he’d chosen to stay behind to be with Taehyung, his parents had told him over a fire-call that it was a wise decision. That it was harder to go back to school after having a short taste of home for the holidays. Even in first year, he’d already guessed that must have also been Taehyung’s thinking.

Maybe he could ask how Taehyung was feeling over dinner. With his jaw clenched, eyes avoiding Jimin’s, it didn’t quite look as if he were in the mood to open up immediately. With a sigh, he grabbed Taehyung’s arm and pulled him back until they were side by side.

“Ok. You do everything on the right of his bed, I’ll do the bed and everything on the left. Don’t touch anything and it’ll be a success.”

It was a long and tiring process. The charm varied in such a way that it needed to be applied to each item individually. Charming the lantern on the bedside table wasn’t a matter of just casting once. It was a matter of casting it once for the lantern itself, a second time for the wax of the candle, a third time for the wick of the candle.

Taehyung had the kind of magic that would manifest visually and commanded attention with its beauty. Today, however, the shimmering wisps of his casting looked more silver than their usual angelic white. Taehyung’s spirits were clearly down.

The sun was close to vanishing completely below the horizon by the time Byakko finally found them, and immediately took a running spring towards Yoongi’s bed. Thankfully, Taehyung caught her mid-leap, her purring rose to an intense level as Taehyung pressed her to his chest.

“ Aish ! This is why we shouldn’t have done this! Think of the poor innocent Slytherin pets who might get harmed here.”

Jimin rolled his eyes, casted the sticking charm a couple more times before addressing Taehyung.

“The only pet daring enough to approach Min Yoongi’s things is Byakko. And you’ve got her covered. No idea why she loves you more than she loves me though.”

“You were going to let her be stuck to hyung’s bed like a moth caught in a spiderweb!”

“Please, don’t be so dramatic. I designed the charm, I know the counter-charm. Obviously.”

“Doesn’t counter the trauma!”

He assessed the room, threw the charm a few more times. Not without a smile. The banter was a sure indicator that Taehyung was in better spirits already. Besides, Jimin was always happy to see Taehyung shower Byakko with love. It was similar to how she was treated at home, and Jimin had worried that his presence alone at Hogwarts wouldn’t be enough for the spoiled calico cat. Of course, Taehyung had befriended them from the very beginning and there had been no reason to stay concerned.

Taehyung had stopped helping, pocketing his wand and petting the top of Byakko’s head instead as he peered at the bed.

“Are you sure this spell is legit? Kind of just looks like we covered everything in syrup of Hellebore…”

“No, it doesn’t,” Jimin argued back, stepping up to be by Taehyung’s side again. Admittedly, the bed covers looked strangely viscous. “Syrup of Hellebore is blue.”

“Ok then, it looks like we covered it in Wormwood essence.”

“Again, no. This looks way thicker than that.”

Taehyung turned to him, alarm obvious on his face even when Jimin pointedly kept his eyes on the bed. Even from the corner of his eye, he could see Taehyung’s plaintive look.

“ Thick !? Oh no, this is so bad. Should we touch it to make sure? Should we just clean it up now?”

“No! No touching. Come on, let’s grab something to eat.”

Taehyung asked for a few more reassurances on their way to the Great Hall, but remained in a good mood. They both enjoyed meals a fair bit more over the holidays, when the hall was nearly empty. No one had anything to say as Taehyung set Byakko down on the table.

“So…” Jimin started, filling one plate for the two of them to share. Taehyung turned large eyes to him, clueless as to where Jimin was going with the single word. “Imagine if they let us go home for Chuseok instead.”

Taehyung’s eyes narrowed.

“You could’ve. It was over the weekend this year. Hoseok-hyung went back and just skipped his Monday lessons.”

The stern expression on Taehyung’s face was enough of a warning not to ask why he hadn’t joined his cousin.

“Well… we could go home later this month for Seollal then, right? Just miss a couple of days of school, I think?”

“Probably better I not miss school. I can take notes for you though if you do.”

Jimin’s fear about his level of English had led him to an extreme amount of studying and preparing for classes and exams. The result had been scores far above Taehyung’s. Personally, Jimin thought first year grades couldn’t mean that much in the grand scheme of things or even of their school life. Taehyung, however, brought up his poorer school performance somewhat frequently.

“Right. That’s what I’m saying. It’s so lame they don’t give us the holidays that actually matter to us. The ones you’d go home to your family for, you know?”

Taehyung gave a one-shouldered shrug, the same rigour as before returning to his expression.

“I don’t really mind.”

Jimin tried again.

“It must feel like they’re always with you anyway,” he mused. “They only ever send you yellow things, it’s like they don’t want you to forget about them. They were both in Hufflepuff, right?”

Taehyung’s mouth had flattened into a long line, a little reminiscent of the expression Yoongi would wear when he thought they were acting ridiculous but was forcing himself not to say anything.

“Like, the yellow lilies they sent you for your birthday earlier this week?” Jimin added awkwardly, unsure why Taehyung had made big eyes at their plate, as if he were contemplating Jimin’s ridiculousness.

Jimin had casted herbivicus to make sure every bud had been in full bloom for Taehyung’s special day. The bouquet was still proudly displayed by Taehyung’s bed, yet another highlight of yellow in their dorms thanks to Taehyung’s sweet and lively presence.

“They’re not even my favourite flowers,” Taehyung grumbled, conveniently swerving away from any discussion centred on his family.

Jimin’s heart ached in response. It was easy to forget how homesick Taehyung must have been under the surface. Guilty, he followed Taehyung’s lead into a different subject.

“Right, poinsettia are.”

“What’s that?” Taehyung asked despite his mouth being full with the mashed potatoes. Jimin typically had to douse those in salt to manage to make a dent in them.

“The red flowers they decorate the castle with during the winter holidays. With a yellow centre?”

“Oh… How did you know they were my favourite?”

It wasn’t a difficult conclusion. Winter was Taehyung’s favourite season by far. Sometimes, he even slipped in the fact that he was born in winter when first introducing himself to other students. He only ever described his family grounds as they were when snowed in — it saddened Jimin to think Taehyung wouldn’t have seen that landscape in two years already. He only ever suggested bringing their food outside, absurdly, when there was fresh snow blanketing Hogwarts. Of course Taehyung loved the flowers he only saw in the school when there was snow outside.

More than anything else, Taehyung always eagerly pointed out the poinsettias when they appeared in halls they weren’t in previously. Jimin would have needed to actively ignore Taehyung to miss the fact that he loved the red flowers.

“We’re best friends, aren’t we?”

Taehyung stopped chewing, then looked over with a huge yet closed-mouthed smile. His cheeks being round with the potatoes only seemed to emphasize the strength of the feelings behind that smile. It was compelling enough for Jimin to smile back just as brightly. He wasn’t in the habit of offering big smiles anymore, always mildly conscious of his chipped front tooth — that had happened over the summer, as he’d practiced flying at home and distractedly flown straight into an ancient pine tree. He was still trying to work out how to magic it fixed himself; not wanting to disclose to his parents that he had flown without their permission and supervision and certainly not satisfied with maintaining the constant focus to have a repaired tooth as part of his metamorphic abilities.

“I only have you,” Taehyung said sheepishly, one of his favourite sayings to answer with whenever Jimin asked him how he felt about their friendship.

And as always, the relief hit Jimin in a cascade. When they’d first started their studies, Jimin had doubted he could end up mattering to Taehyung much. Taehyung had an entire family’s worth of Hogwarts history; he was bound to be familiar to older teachers and the magical grounds themselves. He had his cousin Hoseok, and by extension his best friend Yoongi. He had a lifetime of English lessons to forge new friendships with other students. Jimin had had Namjoon, and Byakko.

And yet, from the moment Jimin had held Taehyung on that first night, Taehyung had stuck to him like glue. Wherever Jimin went, Taehyung was there. They had each other, no matter surrounding circumstances.

“Ok, well, as your best friend, I formally declare that it’s time to go play outside.”

“Really?” Taehyung exclaimed, excited.

He didn’t look bothered at all that they had merely taken bites out of the generous servings Jimin had plated up, or even that the dessert dishes hadn’t yet appeared on the table. Instead, he was up, pulling Jimin along with him by his wrists.

“Have you been practicing your doubling charms?” Jimin asked as soon as they’d stepped outside.

Taehyung looked a little tortured as he heaved out a sigh.

“Must you turn everything into homework?”

“If it’ll make you a fiercer competitor in snowball fights, then it’s worth it.”

“Do we have to? Isn’t it better when it’s us versus them. You versus me is no contest.”

The thrill of magicking sufficient quantities of snowballs and flicking his wrist just so to levitate them was one thing. Pummelling Taehyung with snowballs was another, which was only worth it when Taehyung was in a giddy mood, all giggles while running away from Jimin’s merciless aim. If Taehyung’s heart wasn’t in it, neither was Jimin’s.

“We could walk around, just for the fresh air.”

“We could make snow angels.”

That wasn’t really Jimin’s thing at all. He’d tried with Taehyung before, several times. Taehyung could have stayed sprawled out in the snow for hours on end. He could have probably rolled around in it, too, or sprawled out face down instead. Jimin, however, found it highly unpleasant. The snow, cold and wet, clinging to his hair, behind his ears, seeping through the back of his robes. Thoughts of lying on the beach, feeling the sand between his fingers and toes, they were as opposite to making snow angels with Taehyung as it got. And yet, until meeting Taehyung, resting on the beach had been Jimin’s favourite feeling.

“By the lake?” Jimin inquired, already heading in the right direction. He didn’t bother pushing back.

“Duh, we have to go say hi to our friends.”

“You still think Chueotang is sick?”

He grimaced slightly while using the name. Taehyung had picked up the habit of naming the fish he recognized that swam past their common room. Why he named them all after fish dishes? Jimin couldn’t say for sure, but he wondered if Taehyung simply missed Korean food as much as he did.

“Yeah, he always seems so sad when he swims by these days. Maybe we can wish for his good health as we make the snow angels.”

And Jimin, without complaint, really did. Moving his arms and legs back and forth in the fresh snow, smile growing every time his fingers brushed against Taehyung’s.

When he turned his head, snow uncomfortably entered his ear. Cold, compressing under the weight of his skull. It all mattered very little compared to Taehyung’s expression. Eyes shut peacefully, smile ear to ear, cheeks rosy with pleasure. His chest rose and fell evenly, slowly, as if the feeling of lying in the snow was so blissful he could have fallen asleep at any moment.

There were no traces of moodiness, homesickness, bitterness. And all Jimin had had to do was listen to Taehyung and offer to do the things that made him happy.

“Let’s spend every Christmas together,” Jimin proposed.

He’d noticed Taehyung’s rising anxiety as the winter holiday had drawn nearer. Apparently, he hadn’t assumed Jimin would stay based solely on first year. That anxiety, too, was gone when Taehyung’s eyes fluttered open. His expression didn’t change though.

Taehyung’s limbs stopped moving, so Jimin did the same. He watched fondly as Taehyung slowly brushed their pinky fingers together, wrapping his around Jimin’s loosely afterwards. One of their muggleborn classmates had taught them the gesture. A promise, they had said.

“Deal.”

He faced the sky again, grey and overcast. Somehow, it still felt better than a day at the beach under the bluest of skies. He wondered if he should try transfiguring the yellow lily bouquet to poinsettias later in the night, while Taehyung washed up. He wondered if Taehyung’s parents would stop assuming that all his favourite things were yellow. He wondered if perhaps he should finally move on from the blonde hair.

March 14, 2010

The doxy pried the bright yellow candy from Taehyung’s fingers, immediately curling three sets of arms around the lemon drop. He smiled, satisfied, when the tiny creature gripped the candy between sharp teeth. He nudged the recovery slide closer to the doxy’s feet, ready to collect the doxy’s venom as it salivated around Taehyung’s offering.

“Taehyung, you’re sure you don’t want a cup?”

Taehyung looked back, but did not move from his spot, seated on the ground before the third years’ doxy habitats. A long-term project, meant to teach them about maintaining a constant reserve of ingredients harvested from a magical creature. There was also some component of teamwork, but Professor Kim had let them choose their project partners. It wasn’t like doing anything with Jimin would ever be a challenge, especially not raising their sweet little doxy together.

Though, as he watched Professor Kim levitate a pot of steaming tea across the central greenhouse table, he wondered if he might have overestimated their cohesion as a pair.

“No, thank you, kyosunim.”

“He doesn’t like tea!” Jimin piped in.

He was, of course, correct. But, this year, Taehyung had been somewhat interested in tea. He’d met with Yoongi a few times over the previous summer, the upperclassman telling him all about third year electives. Tessomancy had fascinated Taehyung right away, and he’d found himself peering into his family members’ empty cups of tea more than once afterwards. Alas, divination had never even been an option in Jimin’s plan for their third year.

“You never know when someone’s tastes might change, Jimin.”

“I’d know if it was Taehyung,” Jimin insisted, sounding a tad petulant.

Taehyung turned away from their doxy again. Jimin’s hair had been a fiery orange since their Seollal celebration a month ago. Professor Kim must have been right about Taehyung; he felt fickle at times because every new hair colour Jimin showcased was suddenly his favourite hair colour. At times, Taehyung wondered if he was exceptionally bland next to Jimin. Though today, Jimin’s eyes had been brown, and they had been just as lovely as the most unusual colours Jmin had shifted them to in the past. Taehyung could at least hope that his boring dark eyes and black hair could be lovely in that same way.

“So, what’s been on your mind?” Professor Kim started as the pot tipped midair, drink pouring out into the two cups set out for their weekly chat.

Taehyung let the two of them be for the time being. Jimin dragged him along to his weekly chats with Professor Kim every Sunday, and Taehyung had never dared question why. Did he think Taehyung wanted to be invited? Did he want Taehyung to be part of the chats? Did he simply not want to go alone? And if so, why not just bring Jihyun, who’d joined Hogwarts this year as a Ravenclaw student. At least this year had also brought Taehyung their doxy, who gave him something to do and kept him from feeling as if he were overstepping into Professor Kim and Jimin’s private business.

Jimin was already pulling out a healers’ academic journal from his satchel, and Taehyung’s mind more or less went offline. He didn’t really know the motivation behind it but Jimin was determined to become a healer. Something that just sounded like a lifetime of schooling if one were to ask Taehyung. Also the reason Taehyung had had no choice but to accept Jimin’s electives, arithmancy and ancient runes. He hadn’t wanted to risk upsetting Jimin by asking for them to split so he could attend divination classes, not when Taehyung had no career goal in mind at all.

He brushed his knuckles against the top of the doxy’s head, still determined to chew its way through the lemon drop, though it had made no progress.

Winter had been lingering, and Taehyung could fully sense the morning chill. He pulled out the mittens he’d stashed into his cloak’s pockets. Despite trying to avoid doing so, his eyes lingered on the bright yellow of the items, something his grandmother had specifically knitted for him, recalling how cold the castle could get. Of course, she didn’t have the faintest idea that Taehyung’s dorm was especially cold because it was located in the dungeons.

By now, Taehyung was sure the sorting hat had made no mistake. Long gone were the days where he’d resented the sorting. Yoongi was the coolest person he knew. Jimin was the kindest person he knew. Everyone in Slytherin liked Taehyung, celebrated his successes, and defended him from any other student who’d call him weird or any variation thereof. He loved watching the aquatic wildlife from the comfort of their common room. Taehyung was happy as a Slytherin student.

The only shadow cast over that happiness, tragically, was his own family.

These days, he often thought back to Jimin’s proud hollering when both his little brother and Jungkook — who’d grown up in the same magical commune and who Jimin lovingly referred to as his second brother — had been sorted into Ravenclaw. He wondered, if he dared take the risk, if his family could possibly react in a similar manner. Be happy for who he is, even if that was something different from them.

The doxy grew tired of the sweet just as Jimin turned the conversation to their OWLs. A popular subject for Jimin, despite the exams being two years away. Taehyung cast a small cloud of mist for the doxy to fly through and clean itself of the sweet stickiness. It did so, then curled up on the flat stone in the miniature pond in the corner of its habitat. It folded its wings over itself, not unlike a blanket, then promptly fell asleep.

Taehyung levitated the discarded candy out of the habitat and into the bin, then carefully assessed the space that Jimin and he had designed and created right at the outset of the year. With everything in order, and the doxy fast asleep, Taehyung hesitated.

As if he’d sensed Taehyung’s movements, Professor Kim called for him.

“How about you, Taehyung? Any dreams?”

Taehyung turned and fully sat down on the floor, pondering. Jimin was drawing circles with his wand over his cup, stirring the tea. He must have grown anxious while Taehyung had been focused on the doxy. All of Jimin’s successes came with impressive doses of worries and stress, which nearly no one else witnessed.

“Dreams?”

Taehyung wondered if he could get away with retelling a recent dream or if Professor Kim would insist even if he tried it.

“He still has time to figure it out.”

Jimin sounded defensive, like he’d suspected the question would make Taehyung feel bad.

“As do you,” Professor Namjoon commented, both sounding and looking incredibly wise to Taehyung.

“I have figured it out. We were born with magic, what better use is there for magic than saving lives?”

“Well, healing is not all about saving lives. The mistakes you make as a healer can have important consequences on a patient’s life, too, not always of the life-saving kind. And, perhaps there is a life-saving aspect to other paths. There would be no potions, no ointments, no salves for healers and hospitals without us botanists, right?”

Taehyung leaned back on his hands, enjoying Professor Kim’s mind. Since he hadn’t yet figured out his future — more preoccupied with what he would do if an interviewing employer ever met with his family and revealed the details of Taehyung’s application, the crest of the house he belonged to — he enjoyed the way their professor wanted to give importance to every profession. Like there was no option better than another. A bit like how there was no house better than another, just four different, and equally valuable, houses.

Though he grinned, amused, when Jimin tried to fight against that proposition.

“Only the best of the best become healers. The top of their classes. Eomma and appa sent me here because it’s the best school. I have to use that for something. There’s nothing that would make them prouder.”

The amusement ebbed away. He couldn’t help but to transpose the words to his situation; nothing would have made his parents happier than Taehyung just being the way they wanted him to be, Hufflepuff through and through.

“Well, I know your eomma and appa very well, and I can tell you there’s no expectation like that. And, I can also tell you that nothing would make them prouder than to see you find the path that’s right for you and grow into the person you want to be.”

Taehyung took a deep breath in, puffed out his cheeks, then blew all the air out loudly. He expected that Namjoon’s words wouldn’t change Jimin’s resolve or his thoughts on how to make his parents proud, how to return on their investment to send him far away for most of his childhood. From Taehyung’s position, however, he could only fantasize of a kind man, friends with his parents, revealing to him that his parents would only be happy to see him become whoever he was as a person, regardless of how that may turn out.

He envied Jimin. Sweet, patient, affectionate, thoughtful Jimin. He fought down the automatic thought of, you wouldn’t have that kind of feeling if you were a better Hufflepuff .

Unfortunately, his dramatic sigh had brought the focus back to himself.

“You think I’d be a good healer, right, Tae?”

“You’re my best friend, you’re good at everything.”

“Aha!” Professor Kim exclaimed, looking quite pleased with Taehyung’s quick answer. “And that sort of unconditional love is what you’ll get from your parents, too.”

Taehyung smiled then, proud to show unconditional love so well.

“I mean… I could always find something more challenging. Eden says muggles can travel to outer space. And like, it’s way less than one in a million. They’re called astro… astrollers?”

“Astronauts,” Professor Kim corrected, as Taehyung nodded pensively. Eden, a fellow third year Slytherin who had two muggleborn parents had told them about starships.

“But don’t muggles do that just ‘cause they suck so much at astronomy?” Taehyung wondered out loud.

Jimin frowned deeply, then nodded his head decidedly.

“That’s right! That’s why I have to become a healer.” Jimin smiled at Taehyung, then, “Well, anyway. Why are you sitting on the floor? Join us.”

“Our doxy might wake up…”

“Perhaps you could have a career involving magical creatures,” Professor Kim mused.

Taehyung grimaced; it didn’t feel as if he could escape the question even after all that.

“No? Is there anything you want for the future?”

Had the question come from anyone but Jimin, had it not been so clear that Jimin asked because he cared for Taehyung and genuinely wanted to know, Taehyung would have found another way to pivot the conversation. But it was Jimin, his best friend, and he wasn’t asking out of politeness.

“I just want to be loved for who I am.”

Because even with his big secret, Taehyung still loved his family with everything that he had. Perhaps his family loved him back with everything that they had, but perhaps that love was reserved for the Taehyung who would have turned out “normal”, who could have been like everyone else in the family. He didn’t think the real him would receive the full force of their love. The fear of finding out whether he was right was what kept the heavy secret trapped in his chest, flapping its wings wildly as Taehyung pretended and pushed forward like the secret was light and easily forgotten.

Again, he puffed out his cheeks, then let out a deep exhale.

He thought of the start of the year, Professor Kim revealing the caged doxies, and the disgusted expressions of fellow classmates, exclamations that the creatures were gross pests, and loud protests when they had been assigned to take care of them.

Taehyung thought they were quite adorable. And the one Jimin and he’d received specifically had a sweet personality. Bitterly, he thought life was quite unfair. When he could love so easily, but it didn’t feel like he could receive the same kind of love in return.

He jumped, surprised, when Jimin hugged him from behind, arms securely around his middle, and chin hooked over his shoulder. He’d been drawn into his thoughts so fully that he’d missed Jimin standing and walking over to his side.

“I love you, Tae. So, just keep me around for the future, ok?”

Taehyung nodded, wide-eyed. Thankfully, Professor Kim looked amused rather than concerned. And after a few moments of Jimin squeezing him close and pressing their cheeks together, he too sounded less concerned and more endeared.

“You’re so silly, wishing for what you already have. It’s cute though. You have the biggest heart, should’ve known love is all you care about for your future,” Jimin said when he finally pulled back and grabbed Taehyung’s hand to hoist him up.

“I love you, too,” Taehyung mumbled, somewhat delayed.

“I know.”

Jimin didn’t look smug though, he looked grateful.

Later, as they travelled back towards the castle, Taehyung wondered if he’d be ok if it was only the one person who could return his love in full. Just as he thought it, Jimin gently bumped their shoulders together, looked over with a knowing smile. He’d caught it as soon as Taehyung had lost himself in his thoughts.

Taehyung silently shrugged and smiled back.

It felt like he might be ok.

October 31, 2010

“More?”

“More.”

Jimin scooped more gopchang onto the hot stone, which emitted a mouthwatering sizzle. After an hour of pigging out at the newest — and their favourite — addition to Hogsmeade, Jimin had undeniably hit his limit. But if Taehyung said more, he’d prepare more. No matter that Taehyung looked just as satiated, his head heavy on Jimin’s shoulder.

He peered at Taehyung’s face, finding him glassy-eyed.

“You’re not allowed to make yourself sick.”

“I have to,” Taehyung whined. “The next Hogsmeade weekend is in forever.”

“Hogwarts food isn’t so bad.”

Taehyung groaned, dramatic, curling in on himself and towards Jimin even more than before. Jimin quickly wrapped an arm around his waist, afraid he might just slip right off the booth.

“It is that bad. If there’s another riceless week I think I’ll just choose to die.”

“There’s always other food.”

“Yeah, like the worst kind of food.”

“British food.”

“Yeah,” Taehyung drawled, stony.

“Well, thanks to Namjoon-hyung, we’ve got Jin-hyung’s cooking now!”

He squeezed Taehyung’s waist, the gesture clearly mollifying as Taehyung’s face went back to blank. Namjoon had finally convinced his close friend to open up shop in Hogsmeade. Namjoon claimed he was just building the community he wanted to be a part of, but Jimin wasn’t fooled. Namjoon craved Korean food as much as Taehyung and he did, and had never developed any cooking skills.

Jihyun and Jungkook were still too young for Hogsmeade, but he was making the most of it with Taehyung — binging at Seokjin’s restaurant at every available opportunity.

“No clue how my parents did it. Can you believe one of their Hufflepuff selling points was ‘it’s close to the kitchens’?”

“Yeah, they sure do take the house pride thing to another level,” Jimin commented idly.

Taehyung nearly always brought up his parents in relation to Hufflepuff, as if it were the only topic of conversation at home.

“Ah, apologies for eavesdropping.” Jimin straightened up, surprised by Seokjin’s sudden appearance at the end of their table. Taehyung barely gave any reaction at all, not even lifting his head off of Jimin, instead just raising his eyes to Seokjin. Yet, Seokjin aimed his next words specifically at Taehyung. “You wouldn’t happen to be a descendant of Kim Moonpyo, would you?”

It wasn’t as if Taehyung went rigid, but Jimin sensed the shift in atmosphere instantly, like Taehyung’s magic had darkened his silhouette.

“Yeah,” Taehyung admitted, syllable not giving anything else away.

“Huh?” Jimin shrugged his right shoulder, trying to nudge Taehyung off, but his head remained stubbornly heavy. “Kim Taehyung, what are you saying? Is your appa famous or something?”

Seokjin’s laughter was exuberant, full-bodied.

“Man, I sure hope not! Or his old man would be like a thousand years old.”

“I am. Related that is,” Taehyung repeated, though not happily.

“I didn’t know there were two of you!” Jimin briefly furrowed his eyebrows, then let out a soft noise of understanding as he thought of Hoseok. “Thought of you two —” Seokjin paused there to gesture at the both of them, “— as a Slytherin couple.”

Jimin felt as if he’d grown several centimetres taller as he puffed out his chest.

“We are!”

Not technically a couple, but it often felt that way to Jimin anyway.

“A descendant of Kim Moonpyo and a Slytherin?”

When no answer came from Taehyung, Jimin peered down again to catch his expression. Taehyung’s grimace looked pained.

“Taehyung is a great Slytherin.”

“And you’re not adopted, are you?”

Jimin went slack-jawed at Seokjin’s bluntness. Taehyung, however, finally stiffened.

“I’m not adopted.”

Seokjin’s smile only turned sweeter at Taehyung’s tense response. Jimin wasn’t sure if he’d meant the look to be apologetic.

“Hyung,” Jimin complained after a beat.

Seokjin’s sweet smile faltered.

“What? If being a black sheep were a sport, Taehyung here would be turning it into an extreme sport. A real snake in a sett of badgers.”

“It’s not that big of a deal.”

Despite his words, Jimin was starting to grow unsettled. Taehyung hadn’t relaxed or smiled once since the interruption.

Taehyung had boasted about Hufflepuff on their first day at Hogwarts.

“Every single descendant of Kim Moonpyo has had their magical education in Hufflepuff. Except one, apparently. Unless I’m wrong?”

Taehyung, at last, lifted his head off from Jimin’s shoulder, crossing his arms almost resolutely. Jimin squeezed his waist again. This time, it had no effect on Taehyung.

“No, it’s true. I was supposed to go to Hufflepuff, too.”

“Well, it’s not that true,” Jimin added, resisting the urge to roll his eyes at Seokjin, but not the urge to take an insolent tone. “I know you went to Mahoutokoro with Namjoon-hyung, so you might not really get it. But both Slytherin and Hufflepuff are part of Hogwarts. No one’s receiving their magical education at Hufflepuff, it’s at Hogwarts. What we learn doesn’t change based on houses. We have classes with Hufflepuffs all the time.”

“Yet, none of those Hufflepuffs have the blood of Helga Hufflepuff’s dear friend running through their veins, do they?”

Jimin turned to Taehyung, once again slack-jawed.

“What? Your ancestor was best friends with a house founder?”

“I don’t know about close friends. I don’t know anything, like hyung said, it was a thousand years ago. Can you just go back to saying it’s not a big deal?”

“Well, uh, I mean… I don’t know. It’s pretty cool. You’re the first in a thousand years? That’s badass.”

“And I would add that serving not one but two descendants of a culinary genius is extremely badass of myself, too.”

Jimin could have sworn Taehyung’s lips nearly went up at Seokjin’s next bout of laughter.

“What? Culinary genius? Taehyung! Why don’t you share anything with me?”

Taehyung’s frown was deep as he ignored Jimin, removing the gopchang from the hot stone. It had been seared black, Jimin nervously glanced over at Seokjin. Thankfully, Taehyung pointed his glare at Seokjin rather than at Jimin.

“Hyung, the last of our meat burnt because you were being intrusive. You need to compensate us… with free dessert?”

Seokjin shook his head fondly, swishing his wand once to clear their table.

“Two melon bingsoos coming right up. I usually make Hoseok the mango one, but honeydew seems better for the pair of you.”

Taehyung clapped his hands together, smile radiant. A promise of shaved ice enough to erase that dark aura just that easily. Jimin’s curiosity, however, had not faded at all. He stared Taehyung’s happy profile down until Taehyung was forced to acknowledge him.

“What?”

“The first in a millennium?”

“So? You knew I was from a Hufflepuff family, we were literally just talking about it.”

“Yeah, I knew you were like a legacy student, and that your parents and grandparents went, too. I didn’t know you were like… what? Fortieth generation?”

“Like you said, it’s not a big deal.”

The weight of Taehyung’s head returned to his shoulder. Soon, Taehyung had closed his eyes and crossed his arms, as if his posture alone could immediately put an end to the conversation.

“And you’re basically related to Helga Hufflepuff?”

No answer at first, not until Jimin started bouncing his right shoulder, jostling Taehyung, who caved in with an irritated sigh.

“No. I’m not. My family way back then, they eventually left Korea when whatever muggle war that was going on became too dangerous for wizarding families. Coming here was apparently absolutely awful. But Hufflepuff frequented the same magical food markets Moonpyo did and she was the one person who was welcoming to them, I guess. And she invited his kids to her new school. That’s it. No close friendship. Just the best Hogwarts founder being decent.”

“Too bad there isn’t some Kim cooking heritage at the castle though.”

Taehyung didn’t crack a smile at the return to their initial bad school food topic. Actually, he looked a little annoyed, as if peeved he’d been pushed to share.

Jimin examined him for a while, but Taehyung resolutely ignored his stare this time. Under the annoyance, a hint of melancholy. Jimin wondered if Taehyung had been bothered not to be part of the house of the founder he regarded superior to the others.

“You know, Salazar Slytherin crafted his own wand. One of the best parseltongues and legilimens.” Taehyung gave no sign that he was listening, so he hurriedly elaborated. “Like, maybe he wasn’t super popular or altruistic, but he was probably the most skilled wizard out of the four.”

Taehyung lightly slapped his thigh and Jimin quieted down.

“Stop that. I thought I was a Hufflepuff, but that was like three years ago. I love Slytherin house. You don’t have to sell me on it after all this time.”

Jimin rested his cheek atop Taehyung’s head, and watched passively as passerby walked by the restaurant. A number of wizards and witches carrying pumpkins with them. Jimin himself wasn’t the biggest fan of pumpkin recipes, but he was looking forward to that night’s Hallowe’en feast nonetheless — mostly for the atmosphere.

Still, as they stayed quiet, Jimin turned the words that had been exchanged with Seokjin over and over until he couldn’t keep himself from continuing with the topic.

“I’m sorry hyung made that comment, about being adopted.”

“Dunno, kind of wish I were. ‘Cause if it isn’t genetics, then I can only point to upbringing, and what message would that give my parents…”

“Um, that they raised a unique talent?” Gently, he pushed Taehyung away. He scooted back on the bench to better face Taehyung. “Hey, we’ve never talked about it, but your family isn’t making shitty comments about you being Slytherin, right?”

Unexplainably, Taehyung’s face looked guilty in the moments before he answered. He licked his lips slowly then looked down as he spoke.

“No, they haven’t said anything…”

“And they would be wrong to say anything. You know that, right?”

“Yeah, I know.” Taehyung looked up, all traces of guilt vanished. “Kind of funny that hyung would even know that detail about my family.”

“He’s probably been learning as much as he can about things around here. Namjoon-hyung said he’d never even stepped foot in Europe before.”

“And now he’s got the best place in Hogsmeade,” Taehyung exclaimed, fully back to cheerful.

He even cheered when Seokjin returned with the desserts, waved Seokjin off when it was clear he was about to apologize. Even finished Jimin’s bingsoo when he gave up on eating for a second time that day. And Jimin dropped the subject. He supposed it wasn’t really that important if there had been a thousand years of Hufflepuffs in Taehyung’s lineage. At the end of the day, they were together in Slytherin, and that was all that should have honestly mattered.

Nevertheless, when they left the restaurant, Jimin clutching at his stomach and claiming food pregnancy, Taehyung’s mood took a turn. A mood that would have been difficult for Jimin to explain. Taehyung grew quieter, though it was obvious that he had something on his mind that he wanted to vocalize. At the very least he kept opening his mouth, only to snap it closed moments later, without uttering a word.

They were just about to enter Madam Puddifoot’s Tea Shop — Jihyun had been struggling with sleep lately and Jimin wanted to bring back a chamomile and sleeping draught blend for him — when he decided to finally ask Taehyung.

“Hey, is something worrying you?”

“Yeah, I, well…” Taehyung made a show of patting his robes down. “I think I forgot something at hyung’s. Can you go buy the tea? I’ll meet you here, I just need to go back to make sure.”

“What did you forget?”

It came out suspicious. Because Taehyung never brought along anything when he was going to Hogsmeade with Jimin, always trusting Jimin to bring what they would need and afraid of losing something in town if he were to carry it himself.

“My wand! So, extra important. I’ll be back!”

Taehyung turned and hurried off before Jimin could ask any other questions. And he would have, because Taehyung definitely didn’t bring his wand along to these outings. Something Jimin had scolded him for in the past, and to which Taehyung habitually would answer that he trusted Jimin to protect them both.

Later, with the packaged tea in hand, Taehyung smiled at him easily. His mood shifting yet again, worry washed away.

“Your wand was there?”

“Yeah!”

Jimin made no comment when they returned to the dorm and he spotted Taehyung’s wand, the white aspen beautiful, evidently on his bedside table.

That night, he thought of making his way to the Ravenclaw tower and demanding his brother serve him a cup of the tea he’d purchased. He knew he was about to lose sleep imagining the different scenarios where Taehyung wanted to say something to Seokjin without Jimin present.

May 20, 2012

Jia must have been the prettiest girl Taehyung had ever seen in person.

With her long midnight blue hair, fair skin, delicate features, obvious double eyelids, warm eyes, and pink lips she looked more like a painting than a fellow Hogwarts student.

It was likely Jia’s soul matched her looks, what with her being one of the Hufflepuff prefects.

It was no wonder that, after years of gently turning down their peers, Jia’s had been the first confession that Jimin had accepted.

Taehyung had seen it firsthand, just as he’d witnessed countless other failed confessions. Charismatic, excelling at everything, thoughtful and sweet, of course Jimin caught the eyes and hearts of many.

Jia’s smile had been so heartfelt two days ago, when she’d approached their spot by the lake. She’d even struggled through the confession in a hesitant Korean. Daughter of the Chinese ambassador in England and an extraordinary pure-blooded witch, it felt almost like Jia knew a bit of every language, whether it be muggle or magical.

“Are you nervous?” he asked as he drew his bed’s curtains back.

With Jimin heading out for his date, he’d seen no point in staying in his robes, having just changed into his sleep robes instead. He would have a quiet Friday night, he planned to read a book with Byakko curled up over his lap. If he felt bored, he could always take their doxy out to stretch its wings. It had been nearly two years since the end of their botany project, but Taehyung had never had the heart to part ways with the tiny creature, keeping it in their dorm ever since the end of third year.

“Why wou’d I be ne’vous?”

Jimin’s lips were puckered as he applied a thin coat of glittering balm.

There was nothing unusual about Jimin applying the star glitter balm; it was his favourite. His parents would owl him immediately whenever he wrote home to say his reserves were low. Despite it being a familiar sight, Taehyung still wondered if Jimin was picturing his first kiss. Would Jia, who they’d barely ever even spoken to, be his first kiss?

“Because she’s like a painting?”

Jimin’s finger paused, a breath away from his lips, and then he moved to cover his mouth, nearly hiccoughing with laughter.

“What? That could definitely be a diss as much as a compliment. Imagine being compared to the Gryffindors’ Fat Lady portrait?”

Taehyung could barely understand through his laughter, he watched with a sinking feeling as Jimin twisted the balm’s container closed. He’d been looking forward to his quiet, relaxed evening, but with Jimin’s imminent departure, he suddenly wished the date could have started later in the evening.

“She’s like perfect,” he tried again.

“Yeah, I hear she basically only had Os on her OWLs last year. I’ll try to get some intel.”

Taehyung pressed his lips into a flat line. As a sixth year, Jia had already gone through the hardship that were the Ordinary Wizarding Levels. Exams that Jimin had been preparing for for years now, but that Taehyung was still busy pretending didn’t exist — even now as they loomed over the pair, a mere months away.

“You’re never going to get a second date if you spend the first one begging for studying tips.”

“Always be yourself,” Jimin chirped back as he stood, smoothing out the front of his robes. These were a deep red. Jimin could have nearly passed as a Gryffindor student with the combination of the robes and today’s dark golden mane.

“Well…” Taehyung licked his lips in a slow, dragging motion, realizing he actually had nothing he really felt like saying in that moment. He forced himself to anyway, taking the yellow jasper around his neck in hand to find some semblance of courage. “Have fun. And don’t worry about studying, I won’t be.”

On his way out the dorm, Jimin stopped by his side, curled his hand over the back of Taehyung’s head. Taehyung dropped the jasper, offering Jimin a quick smile.

“We’ll talk after, ok? Jia-noona and I are going to hang out in the Hufflepuff common room. So, I’ll give you all the gossip after.”

Jimin’s laugh at Taehyung’s stunned expression was light. Taehyung didn’t feel even remotely light.

Taehyung felt as if he’d walked into an invisible pillar and it had knocked any whisper of a breath out of his lungs. He’d obviously already known that Jia was in Hufflepuff, but the thought of her sneaking Jimin into the Hufflepuff space was… Taehyung wasn’t sure on the exact description, but it definitely felt close to “terrible”.

Thankfully, he wouldn’t need to explain the sudden feeling to Jimin, who’d already left their bedroom.

Alone, he fell back into his bed, didn’t try to snap out of the sudden feeling, and instead let it take over his senses.

He found himself wondering about the reality where he could have made it into Hufflepuff house. Whether he could have been the one to show Jimin around the space he’d heard so much of while growing up. Whether he would have been a prettier person in that reality where he was exactly as his parents would have preferred him to be. Whether Jimin would have seen Taehyung as the prettiest person he knew.

With a sad sigh he pulled his pillow onto his face. If only Jimin had accepted the affections of a student from another house . Any house.

Time dragged. Taehyung eventually peeked over his pillow. With years of practice, he could tell the hour of the day with only the shade of the lake waters. The water, however, hadn’t darkened at all, as if the moment of “feeling terrible” was going to last an eternity. He tried passing the time by naming each fish that swam by, but nearly none did, as if they had sensed the growing cloud of misery and unease surrounding Taehyung.

When it became unbearable, Taehyung threw the pillow aside, slipped his feet into his bright yellow goat wool slippers, then promptly left their room.

The seventh year dorm was empty, Taehyung guessed its occupants were either busy having the time of their lives for their final year or were wasting away at the library in preparation for the NEWTs. Yoongi, whether it be partying or studying, would be by Hoseok’s side.

Taehyung prayed they weren’t in the Hufflepuff common room. Because he could picture it well, Jimin with the pretty and sweet Jia, surrounded by Taehyung’s family member, his role model, and everyone else in the school who would have better fit into Taehyung’s family.

The pair weren’t in the Slytherin common room either. Dramatic, Taehyung collapsed onto one of the unoccupied sofas. The baroque-styled, golden-framed sofas weren’t the ideal of comfort, but they were attractive to Taehyung, like a shiny object to a raven.

Eyes set on the entrance of the dungeon, Taehyung half expected for Hoseok and Yoongi to walk in. Or even Jimin, though that would have been a little awkwarder. He could always explain that he’d ended up bored without his roommate and best friend.

But neither the pair nor Jimin returned. Even Byakko didn’t find Taehyung. Growing drowsier by the second, Taehyung tiredly glanced back and forth between the entrance and the windows to the lake. The entrance saw little to no traffic, and the water barely grew any darker, until Taehyung’s eyelids became too heavy to stay open.

When his eyes finally did snap open, Yoongi had only just strolled into the common room; a little bit as if his senses had been tuned into Yoongi’s presence. The water had grown to a black mass, the dim green glow a sure indicator that night had completely blanketed the castle grounds.

“Hyung!”

He went to stand up, but paused when realizing the weight of Byakko over his lap. He swiped his tongue between his lips, trying to erase the taste of sleep.

Yoongi moved over slowly, in an almost feline manner. Taehyung put on a cheerful expression. It felt forced, heavy, even though he was happy to see the other.

“What are you up to?”

Yoongi’s eyeliner was slightly smudged, confirming just how late into the night they were.

“Jimin’s on a date,” Taehyung answered, a little bit as if he would have given that exact answer to whatever Yoongi’s opening line would have been.

Yoongi lifted one eyebrow slowly, then smoothed out his expression.

“And he didn’t invite you along?”

Taehyung thought of Jimin’s cheerful, easy admission that the date would be taking place in the Hufflepuff common room. There was nothing to indicate that Jimin had even had a passing consideration to inviting Taehyung along. He frowned down at his obnoxiously yellow slippers, the buttermilk yellow of his sleep robes. The perfect yellow of his jasper. It wasn’t as if anyone, let alone Jimin, could forget that the Hufflepuff common room was his birthright.

“No…”

The syllable sounded conflicted. Even Byakko stirred, as if disturbed by Taehyung’s tone.

Yoongi didn’t respond immediately, taking the seat next to Taehyung instead. Offered his hand to Byakko until the calico cat butted the top of her head against his palm. His eyes were fixed on Byakko as he spoke.

“Of course, it’s not like you expected to be invited…”

A question lingered in his voice, as well as a revelation that his prior question had been humorous, not sincere.

“Oh… sorry. You know we do everything together.”

Yoongi’s fingers scratched gently under Byakko’s chin — who looked pleased but made no move to migrate from Taehyung’s lap to Yoongi’s.

“Actually, you don’t. And I’d be a little sad if you really can’t see that you don’t.” Before Taehyung had time to mull those words over, Yoongi had looked up, eyes as terrifying as they had been the first time they had met. “Regardless, romantic conquests isn’t something that anyone just assumes they’ll be sharing with their best friend. So you two are going to have that uncomfortable talk if that is what you are looking for.”

“That’s not it,” Taehyung said, because the overall effect of Yoongi’s words made him uncomfortable enough already that he didn’t want to look at them too closely. Recklessly, he added in an anguished tone, “The date is with a Hufflepuff girl. Well, prefect. Li Jia. And it’s in the Hufflepuff common room. That’s where they’re having their first date.”

In the silence that followed, both Slytherin boys carefully looked away from one another.

“Oh, Woosa…” Yoongi said after some time, with added gravity. “I think you know this, but Jimin, he’s never really gotten it. I get it because of Hobi. But, you…”

You’ve never clearly explained it to him, Taehyung finished for him mentally. Lips tightly pressed together, he sighed heavily.

“I don’t want him to get it. We work like this.”

Another prolonged silence. When he looked up, Taehyung found Yoongi conspicuously glancing around, clearly confirming the absence of eavesdroppers. Taehyung thought it a little silly, when he’d just told Yoongi that the only other Korean speaker of their house was in a completely different house for the night. Then again, he knew better than to underestimate magic. He wondered about spells to understand foreign languages. Perhaps he could do some research if Jimin really insisted on staying out even later.

“Hey,” Yoongi said sternly, cleanly snapping Taehyung out of his reverie. “None of this is working.” He gestured towards Taehyung sharply, his jaw set, as if he had already been ready to watch Taehyung slump down in shame. “I want you to figure out who you are and want to be. But you’re not going to like this. You are torturing yourself assuming what your family expectations are, and crushing yourself by constantly repeating to yourself that you aren’t meeting them. And never talking about that struggle? To the point where your best friend is clueless? It doesn’t actually make any of it go away. And for anyone looking for it, like me, it’s not even hidden away.”

“No, that’s not what this is about,” Taehyung protested as soon as Yoongi gave him an opening.

However, Yoongi took that opening away, storming forward with his words.

“Yeah? And what will you do next year? Hobi and I won’t be around. What if Jimin spends all his time telling you about Hufflepuff and his Hufflepuff girlfriend, you’re still not going to explain it to him?”

“Explain what?” Taehyung cut in, a slow-simmering anger animating his words.

“You want me to say it?”

“I don’t know what you’re talking about.”

Yoongi inhaled loudly, and it was as if that one inhale of breath had tipped over the atmosphere of the room, the setting of Taehyung’s universe. The room felt darker, yet the lanterns overhead brighter, both Taehyung’s face and Byakko’s body warmer.

“Joining Hufflepuff was your dearest wish,” Yoongi started, in a softer voice than expected. Taehyung bit his tongue to keep himself from correcting the statement. It hadn’t been a wish, it had been a certitude that Taehyung had been waiting for. “And because it didn’t come true, you think there’s something that you lack. You feel like a stranger to your family, and you are one because you’ve lied to them since the day we met. And worst of all, you don’t want to change any of this. You, Taehyung, are set on ignoring all of it.”

The common room still felt simultaneously darker yet brighter. Taehyung’s face as hot as coals.

“There’s nothing for me to change.”

As he spoke, he took note that everything looked much shinier, too. Then, he felt the tears slide down his overheated cheeks. Oh . He was more upset than he’d thought.

Yoongi wrapped an arm securely and tightly around his shoulders, and Byakko started purring at an impressive volume.

“Oh, Taehyung…”

Seemingly, Yoongi had nothing else to stay. They stayed like that for a while, Taehyung batting his eyelashes quickly in the hopes of vanishing the tears, so that no one would recognize that he was crying if they were to enter the common room. It was a bit of a fruitless endeavour, he’d spent long enough in the school that no one was left under an illusion that Taehyung wasn’t sensitive. He was emotional, didn’t fit into the mold of a cold and calculated Slytherin student.

“Do you think Jimin would like me more if I were in Hufflepuff?” he asked when the tears and the sniffling had stopped.

He was probably a little too sensitive to fit the mold of a compassionate, strong, rational Hufflepuff student, too. He would have probably fit best with Jungkook and Jihyun. Jungkook who was sometimes moved to tears when eating Seokjin’s food, or at other times looked furious with how tasty the food was. Or Jihyun who was quick to grow angry, sulky, and just as quick to forget and move on.

“Jimin?” Yoongi asked after some time, a bit as if he had dozed off while waiting for Taehyung to calm down. “Jimin?” he asked a second time, growing more aware. “No, you’re already that boy’s favourite person. How much more do you want him to like you?”

Taehyung nodded, but in reality he was examining the dark water outside. It was late enough to be a new day. Had there been no date, Jimin would have already climbed into bed with a book by now. Perhaps not ready to sleep, but ready to end his time with Taehyung for the day. How could Taehyung be his favourite person if Jimin was out this late with Jia?

Eventually, Byakko left them, and Yoongi accompanied Taehyung back to his room, every one of his movements tinged with apology. Taehyung hardly thought it was necessary. Had he felt better, he would have thanked Yoongi for looking out for him, for wanting what’s best for him, for not settling for the situation that Taehyung had created for himself.

Under these circumstances, he turned down Yoongi’s offer to stay with him until Jimin’s return. Once alone, or as alone as one could be with three other fifth years soundly asleep behind their curtains, he crawled into bed, made sure his own curtains were drawn completely shut, and then stayed very much awake in bed.

Usually, when Taehyung was this upset, Jimin would hold him until he was asleep. Even if Jimin hardly ever seemed to understand the underlying reasons for Taehyung’s sadness, he’d never been so markedly absent. It would be the first night Taehyung would spend alone and upset at Hogwarts.

When Jimin returned, what felt like hours later, he called out Taehyung’s name, softly like a prayer. Or, perhaps not like a prayer, Taehyung thought, as he guessed notes of excitement in Jimin’s voice.

He stayed still and did not answer.

🐍🐍

“Oh, thank the powers at be, you’re here.” Jimin gasped for breath, pushing himself off the last step of the narrow spiralling staircase and clutching onto the doorframe for support. “There’s no way we’re signing up for Astronomy next year. Five years of climbing up here is about four and a half years too many.”

Taehyung would have preferred it if he had ignored Jimin. Instead, he had turned around in shock. He’d snuck out of their room less than an hour ago, set on avoiding his best friend. He hadn’t wanted to hear about the date, not yet. Never had he expected for Jimin to track him down this efficiently. Especially since the Astronomy Tower wasn’t anywhere where Taehyung spent time outside of lessons. Surely Jimin would have pieced together that Taehyung was trying to avoid him then.

Or perhaps not, because after a moment, Jimin advanced towards him, aura as excited as the call of Taehyung’s name had been in the early morning.

“I have so much to tell you!”

Taehyung fought not to flinch, turning away from the lake to observe the west tower instead, the heavy owl traffic on a Saturday morning. Taehyung hadn’t slept a wink.

“Can we talk later?”

“Why?” Jimin still sounded chipper as he stopped next to Taehyung. Strands of his hair were sticking to his forehead, visibly wet with sweat. The locks that had been golden last night were a soft lavender today. “Oh, are you waiting for an owl from your parents?”

Jimin furrowed his eyebrows, squinted his eyes, made a show of how difficult it would be to spot the family owl from this distance.

“No,” Taehyung replied, short.

“Did something happen last night?”

“No,” Taehyung repeated, pointedly keeping his eyes on the owl traffic, even as Jimin’s face inched closer, intent on their eyes meeting.

“You look grumpy,” Jimin commented, tone still light.

His face was too close. With a sigh, Taehyung turned, crossed his arms, leaned back against the castle parapet. He nearly glared at the Great Lake, imagining the Giant Squid emerging grandiosely for a rare spotting.

“Thanks. If that’s all.”

Jimin reached out to tug at the back of Taehyung’s hair, the motion gentle and caring. It relaxed Taehyung, but only for a moment, only until he thought of how boring and ordinary his hair was compared to extraordinary Jimin.

“Come on, let’s go have breakfast? Maybe we can get Joon-hyung to sneak us out to have some of hyung’s cooking?” Taehyung’s posture further softened with the suggestion, but then — “I have so much to tell you, Tae. Did you know that Hufflepuff’s fireplace has —”

“Stop!” Taehyung cut in abruptly, jerking away from an immediately confused Jimin. “I already said I didn’t want to talk. What’s with you?”

“What’s with me? What’s with you? You didn’t stay up for me last night, then you leave without me this morning. To come up here? What are you up to anyway?”

“Oh, was I supposed to stay up until witching hour with nothing to do? Sorry, no one informed me!”

“No, it’s fine, Tae. I want you to rest well…” His voice lingered and Taehyung turned his head away from Jimin, shamefully conscious that his dark circles were obvious. “It’s just that I had so much to tell you about Huffle… puff…”

Jimin’s voice came to a hesitant halt, a clear response to the way Taehyung had painfully clenched his muscles as Jimin had brought up the house once more.

“You know I’m in Slytherin, right?”

“Well, yeah, of course, it’s just that —”

“It’s just that I should have been in Hufflepuff, is that it?”

Taehyung felt so stupid in the ruffled shirt he’d pulled on before slipping out of the dorms. White, it was one of the only non-yellow articles of clothing he owned outside of their uniform, but his grandmother had still embroidered small, delicate, yellow daffodils into its collar.

“No, that’s not it either.” Jimin sounded annoyed, his words a tad harsher already. “I thought you’d be interested because of your family.”

“If you thought I’d be so interested, maybe you should have just invited me along.”

“Invited you…?”

He looked at Jimin, who still looked confused, and felt the dam in his chest, keeping ugly feelings of jealousy and inadequacy at bay, burst in an explosion of sparks.

“You’re supposed to hug me when I’m sad, that’s what we’ve always done, but you were gone!”

The wind rustled Jimin’s lavender hair, no longer sticking to his forehead, his breathing having regulated and sweat dried off several moments before. His confusion looked amplified, to the point of reading as lost. Yet, he still maneuvered Taehyung into his arms. It was an awkward, hardly comfortable hug, and Taehyung didn’t bother wrapping his arms around Jimin. Instead, digging his chin into Jimin’s shoulder and slumping fully against him.

“I didn’t know you were sad when I left…” The question was heavy in his words.

“I wasn’t,” Taehyung answered, painfully frank.

“You were upset that I went to the Hufflepuff common room.”

The confusion had left Jimin’s voice.

“Yeah, a little, I guess.”

Jimin stepped back, but Taehyung clung on to the sleeve of Jimin’s sleep robes — he really had rushed to locate Taehyung.

“I thought you’d want all the gory details. I know you could get them from Hoseok-hyung, but you never brought it up, so… I thought maybe you didn’t want to inconvenience him. Or were afraid to ask.”

“I’m happy in Slytherin house,” Taehyung insisted, lowering his head petulantly.

“I know that . But maybe you wanted to know what it was like for your parents. Maybe surprise them with secret knowledge about their house!”

Taehyung’s head lowered further. Jimin could never understand that to his parents it was their house, including Taehyung’s. That was the role Taehyung would need to keep playing, no matter what.

“No, thanks.”

Jimin tilted his head. There was a golden spark in his eyes, something almost like mischief.

“You don’t want to know how I liked Jia-noona?”

In a horrifying moment of honesty, Taehyung snapped.

“No, I don’t want to know how you like her. You’re supposed to like me the most, not some Hufflepuff girl we barely know!”

There was a strong gust of wind after the statement, reminiscent of times in his early childhood where Taehyung’s magic would manifest with his stronger emotions. The wind was cold enough to be biting and to shake his body with a shudder.

“Oh,” from Jimin, who appeared as surprised as Taehyung felt.

An apology was on the tip of Taehyung’s tongue. They were fifth years, it was time for him to grow up, no more childish fits of jealousy. At some point they would need to grow more independent. Besides, if Jimin dated, maybe it meant that Taehyung could finally pick his own electives, no guilt necessary.

Before he could think of how to word the apology, Jimin had approached, twisting the back of Taehyung’s hair with his fingers.

“I see,” Jimin said warmly, the excitement that had left his features early on in the conversation flooding back in to light up his entire expression. “How about that breakfast?”

Jimin led the way down the long, spiralling staircase. He didn’t let go of Taehyung’s hand once, despite what looked like an uncomfortable twist for his arm. Taehyung couldn’t help but to think that Jimin had understood something that Taehyung didn’t know about. His stomach swooped at the thought of asking about it, so he let it go.

July 30, 2012

Summer lasts an eternity. Do you ever count the number of nights left where we’ll have to sleep in separate homes? The nights are meant to be shorter in summer, but aren’t they just the longest?

Jimin’s fingers delicately went over every curve and line of Taehyung’s handwriting. If he focused just right, he could imagine the scratching sound of Taehyung’s favourite quill over the parchment. Not the thunderbird quill his uncle had brought him back from his excursion in America, but rather the lime green fwooper quill Jimin had gifted him on Valentine’s Day that very year.

He folded the letter back into the envelope. He’d needed some practice to successfully track his family owl’s flight, but he’d managed to crack Taehyung’s home address in the end.

He stood in Deogyusan for the very first time, the mountains heavy with an imposing silence. He might have mistaken the opening before him as the cavern of wild animals if it weren’t for the variety of wind chimes hanging over the entrance. There was a clear magical shine to the objects, one in particular radiant as it caught sunbeams in its colourful glass planets. They were silent though, not a wisp of wind rising as Jimin stepped forward with a nervous exhale.

Taehyung liked him. Romantically. He was sure of it. Taehyung’s heart had nearly broken when he’d gone out on his very first date. That had been an exciting revelation. Because of course Jimin liked Taehyung the most. Taehyung, just, didn’t appear interested in romance at all. Jimin had never known if it would be something the other boy would grow into, or if it was permanently not of interest to him. But he’d picked up on what mattered to Taehyung. His family, over all else. Everyone else was secondary. So much so that Jimin worried Taehyung’s parents might be able to handpick him a life partner, and Taehyung would thank them for it. Without any further input.

And then, miraculously, he’d shown Jimin how much he liked him, and how much he yearned for Jimin to like him back in equal measure.

And then, unexplainably, he hadn’t picked up on any signals Jimin had put out that he felt the same. Jimin’s every advance was met with, albeit adorable, complete obliviousness.

Yet, Taehyung’s every letter over the summer had read like that of a lover. So, Jimin had decided on a plan of action. He would show up at Taehyung’s door, take him out on an undeniably romantic and wonderful date, and Taehyung would finally realize what Jimin had already realized in the month of May.

Of course, he felt much less brave than his plan might have suggested.

Tucking his broomstick under his arm, he approached the entrance to the Kim domain.

The wind chimes all rung at once, Jimin crossing the wards provoking a strong gust of wind that ruffled and made both his hair and robes rise. Before he could attempt to identify himself, a silhouette had appeared in the cavern’s doorway.

The witch wore a short, deep purple cloak. She looked particularly youthful, eyes kind and large. If he hadn’t already known that both Taehyung’s siblings were still children, he would have never guessed the woman before him to be Taehyung’s mother.

“Eomeonim, I apologize for coming unannounced. I was hoping Taehyung was free today. I’m his classmate, Jimin.”

Her face, impossibly, became brighter and more welcoming.

“Park Jimin! Oh yes, thank you so much for taking such good care of our son. Please, come in.” She didn’t give him the opportunity to refuse, turning on her heel and leading him through the family home. “I am glad you came, I don’t think he would have ever gotten around to inviting any classmates over. I fear he must miss home too much. It’s hard to even get him to meet with childhood friends over summers, he just seems to want to stick close to us at home.”

Taehyung’s mother had lowered her voice to a conspiratorial volume, and Jimin sensed that must have meant that they were nearing Taehyung. He felt a swoop in his stomach at seeing Taehyung outside of school, taking him out on a date, winning him over, getting that firm confirmation that Taehyung really was enamoured with him.

Something was nagging at his mind though. Perhaps he had been surprised by Taehyung’s mother’s appearance. He had expected golden robes, eyelids painted yellow, sunflowers growing from her every step. It hadn’t really been that weird that she hadn’t worn any yellow. But the corridors she led him down were filled with magical and homely items — not a single shade of yellow. Nothing like the never-ending parade of yellow coloured presents Taehyung received.

Surely enough, when Taehyung came into view, he was sporting a bright, sunny yellow waistcoat. Seated on an animal fur Jimin couldn’t identify, by the iron pot, where a light fire crackled gently. His youngest sibling, Eunjun, born not long before Taehyung had first left for Hogwarts, seated on his lap and pointing at the book he was reading out loud to her.

“Honey bear?” Taehyung surprised Jimin by raising his head. He’d never shared that nickname with Jimin before. “Look who’s here.”

Taehyung went rigid in the blink of an eye. Lips parting, eyes round like two perfect full moons, spine ramrod straight. Eunjun squirmed on his lap, gripping the edges of the book.

“Who is that, Taehyung?” she asked cutely.

“That’s my friend, Jimin.”

Taehyung unfroze with the words, standing slowly. He held his sister against his hip, who had pulled the corner of the book in between her teeth.

“Hi, uh…” Jimin faltered, his presence in the home Taehyung grew up in feeling strangely surreal. The home itself felt very different from what he’d expected. Jimin had imagined Taehyung crushed in an environment where he desperately needed to conform. Yet, Taehyung was the only one dressed in yellow, like a lone flower in a field of greens. “I missed you, and thought we could spend the day together. That…” He glanced over at Taehyung’s mother, hopelessly lowered his voice. “That I could take you out?”

“Oh.” Taehyung’s eyes remained a panicked round. “I have to help with the little ones during lunch…”

“And you’ll stay for lunch, won’t you, Jimin?” She turned towards Taehyung with a warm smile. “Then you’re free to stay out with your friend as long as you want. We can hold down the fort, honey.”

“You don’t mind?” Jimin asked when Taehyung still showed no sign of excitement.

It very much felt to Jimin that Taehyung minded. Even when he answered with “Of course not.” Eyes didn’t lie, and Taehyung’s had stayed a horrified wide.

Jimin helped Taehyung’s mother levitate the various side dishes to the impressive tree trunk slab table, while Taehyung levitated Eunjun’s book to the bookshelves, then led her to the kitchen basin to properly wash her hands.

It wasn’t long before the missing members of the family arrived, using the same path Jimin had walked. Taehyung definitely looked more like his father, though the man was much tanner, more wrinkled, looked like he’d lived through a lot already. Behind him, Jeonggyu, barely taller than Eunjun was. A foraging basket strapped over his shoulders, overbrimming with fresh produce the two must have cultivated from their very own gardens.

Taehyung’s mother’s magic was deft and efficient, a variety of vegetables washed, roasted, boiled, fried, panned, seasoned, and plated, in a matter of the blink of an eye. By the time they were all sitting down, there was a veritable feast laid out for them. It was no wonder Taehyung had always reacted poorly to the Hogwarts feasts. They never could have held a candle to the food his parents grew with his family magic, prepared in abundance and with love.

“Our Taehyung tells us you live on Geoje Island?” Taehyung’s father addressed Jimin politely. Taehyung’s mother had informed him quickly of their visitor, and he’d responded as warmly as his wife had.

Jimin glanced over at Taehyung, by his side, ready to give him a teasing look for having shared details about him at home. Taehyung’s eyes stayed down on his food. It didn’t look as if he’d had much to eat yet at all.

“Uh,” he hesitated, brain working overtime to figure out Taehyung’s strange reaction and behaviour. “Yeah, born and raised. I think it’s my favourite place in the world, even though I’d almost never gone anywhere else before starting at Hogwarts.”

“What about here? Isn’t here your favourite place?”

Jeonggyu’s eyes were huge from across the table. Jimin couldn’t help but to compare him to the Taehyung he’d met on the train on that very first day, so long ago already. Definitely brothers.

“Geoje is Jimin’s home, Jeonggyu. It’s a great thing when someone’s favourite place is their home. Home is your favourite, too, right?” His mother explained kindly, in a voice where Jimin could simply tell she had a gift with children.

“Because it’s the best!” Jeonggyu exclaimed, small chest puffed outwards.

By Jimin’s side, Taehyung moved his food around his bowl, noticeably silent.

“Do you think you will practice as a healer back home then?”

Taehyung’s father’s question, again, revealed how much Taehyung actually spoke about Jimin at home. The warm feeling in his chest was only attenuated by the strange energy emanating from Taehyung.

“I think so, but… I would probably have to be there permanently. I do worry, if I wanted to start my life with someone…” He curled his fingers, pressing his nails to his palms in a focused effort not to glance over at Taehyung with those words. “I know there’s the floo, and apparating, but if my significant other also worked in a field where they needed to be permanently somewhere. I’d have to see then.”

That was particularly hard to predict with Taehyung, who gave nothing away about the future he wanted to have, or if he’d ever even really thought of it in the first place.

“Lots of studying ahead of you before it comes to that, I suppose.”

Jimin nodded, docile and polite as he turned to Taehyung’s mother to compliment her dishes.

He looked around the home as he ate, noticed floating orbs of light in the dark corridors he hadn’t yet walked down, like magical planets guiding the path in the home.

“I’ve never been in a home like this one. Are there no windows?” He looked over at Taehyung, cleared his throat, still asked even when Taehyung gave no reaction. “You never told me you were used to this, the dungeons probably weren’t a big change then?”

“Does Hogwarts offer more classes than just Potions in the dungeons now?” Taehyung’s mother asked, head tilted.

Taehyung had stuck his tongue slightly out of his mouth, Jimin spotted the way his teeth were digging into the muscle. He reached for Taehyung’s thigh under the table, but drew his hand back when Taehyung shifted his chair away from him.

“Just Potions, I think…”

“I can’t imagine Taehyung would like those classes much. He’s always been our little bear. Spent all his summers napping in the cabbage patch under the sun. Our little sprout.”

“Our magic keeps the cavern bright, but Taehyung has always loved the outdoors,” Taehyung’s father added.

“Yeah,” Taehyung voiced weakly, finally looking Jimin’s way. His eyes were furtive, shining with an equally weak spark that was calling out to Jimin. “We spend lots of time out on the grounds at Hogwarts, too. Right, Jimin?”

“Right,” Jimin confirmed brightly, keeping his eyes on Taehyung, willing him to give him a sign as to what he needed Jimin to say in that moment. “We love making snow angels in the winter,” he offered when the spark in Taehyung’s eyes did not dull.

“And we love sitting by the lake. Jimin is really great at making shapes with the water. He can make a perfect sphere, just like your light magic eomma, appa.”

“Taehyung must be the lake’s number one fan,” Jimin added, feeling emboldened by the charmed smiles around the table. “He even names the fish that swim by the common room the most often.”

“Pardon?”

The change was barely perceptible, but after a beat, Jimin could sense it fully. Taehyung’s mother’s smile had gone from charmed to pained. His father’s smile, on the other hand, had dissipated. Instead, his eyebrows had drawn close together, entire face furrowed in concentration. By his side, Taehyung’s head was completely down, his moving of the food in his bowl a tad more frantic.

“I mean, it’s cute? For the most part, he names them after fish dishes. So a bit morbid.”

“What fish?” Taehyung’s mother asked in the same tone of voice she had used for both her younger children when giving them explanations and instructions.

“In the Great Lake,” Jimin answered slowly, his expression growing confused.

“Do you use a crystal ball? Bear, you told me you had opted not to take Divination…”

“Eomma, Jimin is just being silly… It’s just a silly game we play.”

“What fish would you be seeing from the sett, son?”

Jimin shared a confused look with Taehyung’s father, the word choice settling in too slowly for Jimin to catch on to what was happening in time.

“Oh, has Taehyung not described our common room to you?” Taehyung’s head snapped up, mouth falling open, but he didn’t manage to cut in before Jimin finished his thought. “It’s kind of like an aquarium? There’s a glass wall and the other side is the lake. So we have fish swimming by all the time.”

There wasn’t a smile left around the table. Jeonggyu’s round eyes looked particularly concerned, as if he could tell there had been a shift in his parents’ magical auras. Eunjun, perhaps too young to sense anything, was still eating. There wasn’t a shadow of a smile left on Taehyung’s mother’s face, who had brought a hand up to her mouth, which did not do much to hide a devastated looking expression. Taehyung’s father, instead, looked furious.

“And what do you mean exactly by our common room ?”

“Appa…”

Jimin jumped when Taehyung’s father slammed his hand flat down against the table. He must have had infused the movement with magic, because the force felt unimaginable. Eunjun dropped her spoon in surprise.

“Don’t you appa me, Kim Taehyung,” he bellowed, indeed furious.

Across the table, Eunjun had tucked her face into Jeonggyu’s neck, clearly scared by their father’s anger. He hugged his sister back. His eyes, for the first time, pointed downwards rather than around in curiosity.

“This is what you’ve been hiding from us?”

“No, appa, Jimin misspoke. We just know someone in Slytherin, it’s not our common room.”

Before fully processing what the words meant, Jimin was rushing to help Taehyung.

“Oh, right, we don’t see any fish from the sett, our real common room. But, Taehyung and I have been in every common room. We watch the owls from the Ravenclaw tower, too. Sorry, that must have been confusing when I said our common room… It just feels like everything in the castle is really ours, right?”

“I should have known…” Taehyung’s mother’s voice wobbled with the admission. Jimin was shocked to find she was brushing tears off her cheeks. “You’ve lied about the littlest things for years now. Deceit is one of the main characteristics of Slytherins. You know that, don’t you, Taehyung? Your housemate here didn’t hesitate to jump in and lie with you just now.”

“You should have told us.” His father this time, stern. “We would have pulled you out and gotten you back home, instead of letting the Slytherin environment erode your values and character.”

Alarmed and confused, he looked over at Taehyung. Shoulders slumped, head ducked, aura growing darker by the second; he wasn’t about to defend himself or talk back to his parents. That much was obvious to Jimin.

“Taehyung has great values and character. There’s nothing eroded about them.”

“Oh, please. Stop with the lies. You are a guest in our home, please behave as such.”

Taehyung’s mother’s tone and air had done a complete one-eighty. Her hospitable, warm presence morphing to cold and hostile.

“Slytherins aren’t liars,” Jimin snapped, affronted by the two adults’ behaviour. “Maybe it’s just Hufflepuffs who are too easily duped? Taehyung is your child. You’re his parents. He couldn’t even tell you which house he was sorted into without you threatening his education? And, worse, you didn’t care enough to notice he felt that way? You couldn’t figure out he wasn’t in Hufflepuff for five summers straight?”

“Enough!” And now, Taehyung’s mother had slipped into cruel and aggressive. “You don’t know the first thing about our son. This — ” She gestured, grandiose, towards Taehyung, “is not the son we know and love. Our son would not lie to us like this. And he wouldn’t keep people like yourself as company.”

Taehyung’s father nodded his head once, solemn in his approval.

“It’s best you go home now, Park Jimin-ssi.”

“Yes, it probably is.” He stood up, then threw a sorry glance at the two children, still huddled together. “Taehyung, will you come with me?”

If Taehyung had been willing to follow, he would never know. Because his father answered instead, with a curt “Taehyung is staying.”

End of discussion, seemingly. Taehyung’s mother stood. A strange mixture of emotions coloured her expression. Angry, definitely, but also discouraged and guilty.

“I can walk myself out,” he announced, not wanting to give Taehyung’s parents an opportunity to say anything just as awful while they had him alone and away from the children. “By the way, badgers are predators to snakes. Not the other way around.”

He left it at that. Furious as he stomped away from the dining area. The halls felt distinctively less homely this time around. He lingered near the wind chimes once out of the home. Impossibly worried about leaving Taehyung behind, a defenceless snake in a sett of badgers. Taehyung never followed.

On his way home, he let himself review how things had unfolded.

Taehyung had kept an enormous secret from his parents, the ones he loved the most, for years. In the same breath, he’d kept that secret secret from Jimin, who had unintentionally exposed his best friend to his family’s spite and scorn.

It was no wonder Taehyung didn’t have dating in mind.

It hurt to think that Taehyung might have trusted him less than Jimin had always trusted him. He ignored that feeling as soon as he was home, pulling out a quill to send an apology letter to Taehyung instead.

No answer ever came to that letter. Or any of the dozens of letters that Jimin sent over the course of the next month. 

September 1, 2012

He only remembered that Hoseok and Yoongi had graduated when three dark-haired heads turned his way. No parents in sight. No first years to join their ranks. Only the Geoje Island trio.

He’d cut it as close to the scheduled portkey time as he could afford, despite his parents’ commentary on his lack of respect and punctuality.

Somehow, Jihyun beat Jimin to the punch and addressed Taehyung first.

“Taehyung! Where are your parents?”

His return to Hogwarts, yearly, had marked a stressful event. Where he monopolized all of his parents’ time around the other parents, clung to them, sheltered them from any sort of possibility of finding out their eldest son was a Slytherin. The wiser move would have been asking them to stay at home, let him make the journey alone. But the guilt had prevented him. And he’d missed his parents so badly, he’d wanted them to be together until the last possible minute.

“Your parents trust Jimin to get you all here safely. We’re the same age, you don’t think my own would trust me to get myself here?”

“I guess…?”

Jihyun looked somewhat concerned as he looked over at Jimin. Taehyung looked away altogether, exhaling loudly through his nose. He didn’t want to catch the kind of look the brothers would share. Because everyone knew Taehyung loved his family almost obsessively. Suffered from any separation, no matter how short. He kicked at the forest floor, feeling his anger rise.

“You barely made it in time though?” Jungkook cut in, looking bored as he chewed and blew his bubblegum.

Taehyung focused on that, Jungkook’s laidback air a better hiding spot than the Park brothers’ perceptive concern.

“Wouldn’t miss your birthday…”

Jungkook’s bubblegum popped, revealing an excited smile.

“Aw, hyung, you never forget!”

Taehyung dug his hand into the pocket of the brown suede jacket he’d picked for their trip to King’s Cross Station — the article was at least thirty years old, worn by his father when he had been a teen himself. He fished out Jungkook’s present, which he’d simply stuffed into a leather pouch.

“Here, from your hyung.”

He watched avidly as Jungkook immediately loosened the strings of the pouch, pointedly ignoring the intense looks he could feel from at least Jimin; perhaps also Jihyun, not that he would look to confirm.

“Oh, for practices?” Jungkook asked curiously when the golden snitch fell into the palm of his hand.

“Yeah I charmed it with an intermittent invisibility spell. So, it’ll make it tougher for your practices. You need to shape up what with being the school’s youngest quidditch captain ever.”

“I don’t even know if that’s technically true,” Jungkook protested, cheeks an instant red at the reminder that he’d been appointed captain in his third year at Hogwarts. His smile was fond though as he put the snitch back into its pouch with great care.

The gift had taken time, a lot of time. Which Taehyung had had in spades in the last month. He’d needed something to concentrate on, a challenge, something that went beyond his own abilities. Something to keep him busy enough to not respond to Jimin’s increasingly apologetic letters.

“Hi, Taehyung,” Jimin’s voice finally came. Small and resigned, as if he’d already known Taehyung would ignore him.

With a heavy heart, Taehyung cleared his throat, then set his eyes on the portkey.

“It’ll be time any second now,” he said, his avoidance obvious.

The others simply reached for the portkey. It was refreshing not to hear complaints about his behaviour. He hadn’t had a day like that for a long while.

🐍🐍

For the very first time, Taehyung cast the engorgio spell on his trunk himself.

Like every other year before, he missed his home already. Unlike previous years, he’d been counting down days until he could flee his family. He had no plans of writing home, or of opening letters if any came. This was of course complicated by the dread of facing Jimin. He couldn’t say he had plans regarding the Jimin situation, but for now he had no will to open up to his best friend. And no will to open up to someone he felt so connected with meant that his safest bet was avoiding Jimin altogether.

For their journey by train, this meant taking refuge in Jungkook and Jihyun’s cabin.

He wasn’t sure how to describe Jimin. Surely, Taehyung was more deserving of the social butterfly title. But Jimin felt more like the ideal of popularity, well-liked by all and blossoming under that very appreciation. He was close to Taehyung like no one else, but he was on friendly terms with everyone else.

Jihyun, on the other hand, was completely different from the both of them. Taehyung wasn’t sure he’d ever heard even a squeak of English out of Jihyun. And he didn’t have one close and intense friendship the way Taehyung and Jimin, or even Hoseok and Yoongi had. He had one close and intense friendship with Jungkook, and nothing else. When visiting Hogsmeade, he was only ever interested in visiting Dervish and Banges to scour the shelves to identify hidden antiques. He would lose himself in the castle hallways analyzing the various artefacts from long forgotten centuries, and followed the castle ghosts without ever befriending them. Simply put, he was focused on doing his own thing, which sometimes embarrassed his older brother. They were rarely spotted together at Hogwarts, the two like peas of different pods.

This made Jihyun’s cabin the unlikeliest place for Jimin to sit.

He hurried to Jungkook’s side, took the window seat, and sunk down in hopes that Jungkook’s increasingly muscled stature would hide him from Jimin if he decided to go searching for him. He kicked his feet up onto the seat in front of him for good measure. He could pretend to have fallen asleep if Jimin were to enter, then there would be no way for Jimin to take the seat facing him.

“Hey?” Jungkook greeted him, evidently surprised to have Taehyung joining them.

“Hide me,” was all Taehyung managed before the cabin door was pushed open again.

There was no denying that Jimin looked straight at him and could very well tell that Taehyung was not asleep. Yet, Taehyung quickly squeezed his eyes shut, evened out his breathing, and left it at that.

“Er… did you want to join us, hyung?” Jungkook asked. Taehyung heard his bubblegum pop after the question.

“Of course. Someone’s got to watch over Taehyung as he sleeps, right?”

He sounded deeply unamused. The familiar feeling of guilt was forgotten when Jimin took hold of Taehyung’s ankles, then sat down with Taehyung’s shoes over his lap. Taehyung grimaced, wishing he’d pulled his boots off before kicking his feet up. It felt intimately offensive to have the boots he used as he hiked through the mountains over Jimin’s nice slacks; especially when Taehyung hadn’t even bothered to greet him back.

The journey by train was excruciatingly long. Jungkook and Jihyun had endless topics of conversation that they never fully exhausted. Their dialogue like a ping pong match, with their hits sometimes like ships passing in the night. Despite the nonsensical rhyme to their chatter, there was something nice about it. They were truly excited to be reunited, even though they had spent the summer in the same neighbourhood, no doubt seeing each other frequently.

Jimin only interjected from time to time, in a soft and tired voice. A contrast to his firm grip on Taehyung’s ankles.

Taehyung was almost proud of himself. His resolve staying strong in the face of a reserved and resigned Jimin. However, it proved to be paper thin some hours into the journey, when Byakko apparently rose from slumber. Her meowing weak at first, steadily louder, and soon punctuated by the swatting of her paw against Taehyung’s calf. If Jimin was patient and silent when faced with Taehyung’s cold shoulder, Byakko was insistent, loud, unrelenting.

And Taehyung’s heart was terribly softened to animals. The meowing was an inescapable reminder of Taehyung’s cruelty.

So, he drew his feet back, sat up, and opened his arms to Byakko, who was quick to catch on and leap across the gap between the two benches. Taehyung hugged her to his chest and, finally, looked at Jimin. Who didn’t look resentful at all. Not even upset. It was that same kind of concern he had seen from Jihyun. Accompanied with that quintessentially Jimin smile, soft and sweet and loving.

Ashamed, he focused his attention on Byakko.

“She always misses you during the summer,” Jimin tried again, looking less defeated than before.

Taehyung felt the words left unsaid — I miss you during the summer, too .

His resolve tore entirely.

“I missed you, too,” Taehyung confessed.

Despite the words, his instinct was to wince when Jimin opened his mouth to speak. There was no doubt in Taehyung’s mind that it would concern his family, or why Taehyung hadn’t been more forthcoming with his best friend.

Surprisingly, Jimin asked, “How’s our doxy doing?”

The poor doxy, never even named, always going by “our doxy”. He felt a squeezing sensation in his chest as he answered. He made sure to keep his voice low enough not to distract the two younger boys, who were still jumping from topic to topic beside them.

“I don’t know…” He took a calming breath before explaining. “My parents never liked it. They said it was a pest, which is true, I guess. Uh, they said keeping it was part of the disturbing interests that I developed from being in Slytherin. So, I had to release it back in the wild.”

“Oh… you’ve taken care of it for three years.”

Jimin’s tone wasn’t the judgemental one he’d braced for.

“It never really needed us. So I think it’ll be fine.”

Jimin reached out and squeezed his knee. His hand lingered afterwards.

“Sure, but I’m sure we’ll miss the little guy.” He frowned when Taehyung only nodded back, then added, “There’s nothing disturbing about taking care of magical creatures, by the way. Pest or not.”

Taehyung shrugged his shoulders. Because that could only qualify as the tip of the iceberg of the things his parents had found fault with in the last month. And it was an iceberg of gargantuan proportions.

They didn’t speak much more afterwards, but Taehyung didn’t pretend to be asleep again, and smiled back whenever Jimin pointed his beautiful smile at him first.

🐍🐍

“Yeah, we just want to practice casting silencio . Jungkook kind of struggles with that one.”

“Jungkook…?” Taehyung parroted, giving Jihyun a hesitant look.

In his experience, Jungkook miraculously pulled off any new spell on the first try. Jungkook was too gifted to ever “struggle” with spell-casting.

“Well, silencing charms are on the OWL curriculum.” Jimin nodded sagely.

Taehyung took his seat in the back of the carriage, watched as both Jihyun and Jungkook cast the spell and as the barrier of silence settled, shimmering, in between them and the pair.

He sighed.

“Jimin, it’s fine,” he tried to preempt, without success.

“No, Taehyung. I am so, so, so sorry. I could feel there was something off, and I should have read the signs you were giving me better. I, just, I really didn’t think of that. I had no idea that they didn’t know, and it might not matter that it was unintentional, but I really am sorry.”

“Aren’t you mad that you didn’t know?” Taehyung asked with some fear.

Jimin seemed to give it some thought, raising his eyes upwards. His irises had been dark on the Hogwarts Express, but now they were a cloudy grey.

“No,” Jimin finally said, as if he’d only just decided. “It was… surprising. But, I mean, they made you get rid of our doxy after?” He stopped, only continuing once Taehyung gave a slow nod. “So, you knew you couldn’t tell them. I would have listened if you’d wanted to talk. But maybe you just didn’t want to think of it…?”

For a moment, Taehyung watched Jihyun and Jungkook in the front of the carriage, completely carefree.

“It’s totally embarrassing, right? You all know I love my family like crazy. Meanwhile, they don’t even love who I really am.”

“What? That’s — no.”

Jimin seemed to fight for words, eyebrows lowered, jaw set as he processed Taehyung’s reasoning.

“Yeah,” Taehyung argued back, without any bite. “And here you are always telling me how loveable you think I am. And I want that to be me, but… now you know it’s not.”

“No, fuck that!” Jimin surprised Taehyung, swearing for what seemed to be the first time ever. Taehyung’s shocked expression only deepened when Jimin grabbed his hands. “You’re the most loveable person I know. What I saw or what goes on when you’re at your family’s doesn’t change that. Getting that upset over you being different from them, being your own loveable self? That’s on them. Not you.”

Jimin spoke with such passion that Taehyung was nearly convinced. But, even convinced, there was something greater crushing Taehyung’s chest.

“But, I want them to love who I am.”

His heart felt as if it had finally splintered under the pressure. Because he knew that Jimin wouldn’t argue back against him. He probably could have before this past month of August. When these feelings were but conjecture or fear. It had been a miserable end to the summer, his parents fixated on Taehyung’s deception. To the point where he hadn’t heard another loving word from them since they had found out.

No one was going to argue with him that his parents loved who he was turning out to be now.

He didn’t expect it when Jimin pulled him into a hug, but he still curled his arms around Jimin’s waist and sunk into the embrace.

“Well, I love you,” he whispered to Taehyung, as if there weren’t already two silencing spells protecting their exchange. “And I love the parts of you that keep secrets from me, too. All of you. And whoever you become in the future. I’m going to love all of you, so there’ll always be at least one person who loves you fully.”

“I love you, too,” he spoke into Jimin’s shoulder.

He felt it was terribly unfair, that Jimin had to love the unpleasant parts of Taehyung, when all of Jimin was already wonderful. There was nothing difficult to love at all.

Yet somehow, what Jimin chose to say next was, “I know, and I’m really lucky that you’ve chosen me to love.”

That night, they didn’t make it far into the feast. In fact, they had snuck out of the Great Hall midway through the sorting ceremony. Taehyung wasn’t sure if it was his sadness over the situation at home, or Jimin’s sadness over Taehyung’s extended silence over the summer; but they had both craved for that embrace to continue.

So, naturally, they chose one of the beds of their new dorm, and wasted the rest of the night away in each other’s arms.

Part of Taehyung wasn’t even sad at all. More like relieved. The worst case scenario had happened. Sure, he’d lost so much. But he also hadn’t lost the way Jimin saw him. As if, maybe, Jimin had managed to see him for him, even with Taehyung keeping secrets for so long.

“Hey,” he spoke in the dark, long after their roommates had returned from the feast. “You were right back then. Your eomma must give the best hugs. Since, you know, so do you.”

At first, Jimin said nothing. Taehyung feared Jimin must have forgotten the words he had used so long ago, when he’d first held Taehyung while he had been upset, terrified at the reality of having been sorted into Slytherin. But then, Jimin surprised him once more.

“Yeah? My eomma will love you, too. Do you want to meet her? Should we go to Geoje Island for the Christmas holidays this year?”

“What? Your parents would let me?”

“Uh, of course. You’re all they’ve heard about for the last five years.”

Taehyung felt flustered. He’d imagined Jimin’s frequent topics of conversation with his parents would centre around school exams and his future as a healer. Not Taehyung.

“Yeah, ok. Ask them to make sure though.”

“Of course!”

Jimin sounded uncharacteristically giddy. Even pulled back to kiss Taehyung’s forehead. Taehyung didn’t say anything more, afraid he might stutter. His face certainly felt bright red.

He knew Jimin was offering to share his family in a time where it was unclear whether Taehyung’s would abandon him completely. And Taehyung was going to make sure to show he appreciated it, starting by moving forward and finally leaving behind the hurt of not being accepted by his family. 

December 8, 2013

It had been impossible to ignore or miss the display in Seokjin’s window. Jimin dropped his hand where it had been extended towards the restaurant’s door. He retraced his steps, attention completely caught by the elaborate showing. He was suddenly deeply aware that he had never noticed the restaurant’s display before. It was his favourite food away from home — what more did he need to know?

On a small puffy cloud, illuminated soft blue by magical orbs of light dancing around the display like fireflies, rested a perfect cream sponge cake. Colour like the fresh snow, decorated with strawberry slices, positioned expertly into the shape of a blossoming flower.

On another cloud, this one illuminated a cool yellow, sweet rice and red bean cakes, but made to look like small chubby white rabbits, with a light pink for both their noses and ears.

On yet another cloud, glowing a mystic purple, a beautiful plate of gotgamssam, the persimmons lightly dusted with powdered sugar.

Jimin wouldn’t have thought of ordering dessert today, but now it felt like an inevitability.

He noted the impressive Christmas tree towering over the clouds of sweet goods, in the same cold colours as the clouds, as well as the garlands of lights the orbs formed in the outer edges of the windows, framing the display expertly. There was a certain shimmer to the entire picture. A glow of careful and thought-out spell-casting. There was also a delicate quality to the products chosen, the ornaments used for the tree, and the colours that warmed Jimin’s chest. Perhaps it hadn’t felt like Christmas season until that very moment.

Taking in a breath in deep satisfaction, Jimin entered the shop and called out for Seokjin.

“Hyung?”

Luckily, the man’s laugh carried, and Jimin quickly found the table he was occupying with Taehyung.

“Oh, Jimin!” Seokjin exclaimed.

“Hey,” Jimin greeted quickly, beyond happy to slide into the booth next to Taehyung. His friend had left the castle early in the morning, claiming that he had agreed to meet with Seokjin for a reason that he had succeeded in keeping secret from Jimin. He sometimes forgot how slowly time passed when Taehyung wasn’t with him.

“Hi,” Taehyung nearly sung, hugging Jimin’s arm and pressing his cheek quickly to his shoulder. That same warm feeling he’d experienced outside the shop started spreading farther with Taehyung’s easy show of affection.

Seventh years now and he still hadn’t managed to ask Taehyung out. No matter, in the last year he had become very secure in the knowledge that Taehyung loved him beyond words. Even without any romantic dimension, that love was invaluable.

“I didn’t know there was a Christmas dessert menu,” he commented on as he shrugged off his winter cloak. “Those little bunnies are too cute, should’ve gone for little snakes though. It’s the year of the water snake after all.”

“Why didn’t we think of that?” Seokjin pointedly looked at Taehyung.

“Bunnies will draw in more customers. Cuter,” Taehyung reasoned calmly.

“Maybe I should design two little rice cake snakes to prey on the little bunnies. Woosa knows you two have shown me snakes come in pairs.”

Jimin lit up at the statement, but by his side Taehyung shook his head sombrely.

“Hyung, no one wants to think of snakes preying on innocent rabbits when picking where to have a festive meal.”

“Did you help him set up?” Jimin asked, slowly realizing that Seokjin was turning exclusively to Taehyung for advice on the details of the display.

“He did more than that. He designed, directed my food making, then did all the spell work.” Seokjin looked particularly proud as he enumerated the various steps of Taehyung’s assistance.

“What? As a belated birthday gift to hyung?”

“No,” Taehyung mumbled, looking suddenly reserved as he twirled his white aspen wand between his fingers.

“I paid him to do it,” Seokjin clarified, as if it were the most natural of statements.

“Huh? Kim Taehyung, you started a business?”

“Not really,” Taehyung corrected hastily. “I just, have been talking with hyung…” He looked over at their elder urgently, and Seokjin gestured for him to go on. “About how I’d like to use my magic to make beautiful things. Things that will make other people happy.”

“I needed someone to make me a beautiful window display, and if he could pull it off, then I know tons of other shopkeepers in this village that need it, too. Good starting point for what Taehyung wants to do.”

“I know it probably sounds vapid to you,” Taehyung admitted in a lower voice, self-deprecating.

Mind reeling, Jimin took a moment to respond.

“What do you mean?” He rested his hand over Taehyung’s knee, squeezing when Taehyung’s expression didn’t shift. “I don’t think that at all.”

“Not like I’m going to be saving lives…”

Jimin twisted his tongue inside of his mouth, reviewing in his memory comments he’d made about healing that could have easily put down any alternative career choice. But he’d obsessed over that goal for years, his comments endless, and nothing specific came to mind now.

“You don’t know that,” he finally declared. “The Christmas display stopped me in my tracks. You don’t know who’s out there who’s all out of happiness. Creating to bring happiness, that could make all the difference.”

Taehyung’s eyes widened, but his cheeks were rosy. As if Jimin’s words had indeed surprised him, but he had still believed and accepted them.

Jimin was only reminded of Seokjin’s presence when the owner stood up. His eyes were fond, but his grin held that sardonic twist it often did.

“Well, he sure is going to make a difference for my cash register. I’m ready to add a cute dessert to every single customer’s order. The usual for main dishes for the two of you?”

For the next few minutes, Taehyung and Jimin argued over preferences, selecting the perfect menu for an end of term dinner. Jimin felt terribly touched, when before leaving, Seokjin added a word of praise for Taehyung, sans the sense of sarcasm.

“You should be very proud of yourself, Taehyung. You really are forging your own path. And we’ll all support you.”

The comment made Taehyung obviously shy, so much so that he still looked preoccupied once Seokjin disappeared into his kitchen.

“It’s awesome that you’re starting to figure out what you want to do,” Jimin said lightly, curious to hear what Taehyung had to say about it.

Taehyung though struggled to come out of his shell, shrugging and turning his attention to the front of the shop, where the tall Christmas tree stood.

“Last year and I’m just starting to, and it’s nothing concrete.”

That might have been the case, but the Taehyung from a year ago had been extremely different. Despondent in a way. Insecure and fearful as the term came to an end and Jimin still hadn’t revoked the invitation to spend the holidays with the Park family. Jimin guessed that Taehyung had mostly been afraid of rejection. A year later, and Taehyung hadn’t needed to suffer any further rejection; had rebuilt his confidence slowly and surely.

“Doesn’t matter. If I changed my mind about what I wanted to do halfway through healer training, what would you say?”

“You excel at everything. I’m expecting straight Os this year again. I don’t think it really matters that much for you…”

“Well, I don’t excel at anything in practice, yet. This is your first time using your magic for an installation like this, and it’s excellent from the get-go.”

Taehyung was definitely embarrassed now, smacking Jimin’s thigh lightly.

“It’s not that great, c’m’on.”

“It is!” Jimin insisted, eager.

When Seokjin’s parade of dishes floated out of the kitchens, Taehyung looked particularly relieved. Jimin let it go, focused on piling generous servings of food into Taehyung’s bowl. He didn’t bring the subject up again, but it stayed near the front of his mind. A rush of relief at how Taehyung had found a direction and had pursued it; not even needing Jimin’s encouragement.

Taehyung didn’t speak much during the meal, perhaps afraid that conversation would turn back to his newest endeavours. Empathetically, Jimin offered him a clear shift of topics.

“Did you want to split on Christmas presents again?”

“Oh!” Taehyung brightened instantly. “I have the perfect idea for eomma!”

Jimin’s heart ached in a bittersweet way. Taehyung had spent the Christmas holiday with them the year before, and then had been around more often than not over the summer. Taehyung rarely spoke of how things were like in his family’s home. But Jimin understood that Taehyung’s parents weren’t openly hostile. Just different from before. He could also see that Taehyung longed to be present for his siblings despite circumstances. Regardless of the state of affairs with his family, he had warmly opened his heart to Jimin’s parents. Had referred to them as eomma and appa within the first days of last year’s winter break.

He loved how comfortably Taehyung fit into his family. However, Taehyung’s excited tone was also reminiscent of the way Taehyung had spoken about his family when they’d only first met. Jimin’s heart hurt for Taehyung, who had lost a lot of what should have been a secure foundation for his life.

Later, after sampling each of Seokjin’s advertised desserts, they left the restaurant fully sated. Unable to resist the urge, Jimin paused in front of the display again. They had feasted and chatted with Seokjin long enough that Hogsmeade’s streets had become considerably darker. The magical fires in the street lights burning brightly already. The effect of the display was even more whimsical in the dark. Its glow like the very essence of Taehyung’s magic.

“You like it?” Taehyung asked after a beat.

“I love it,” Jimin responded almost automatically, eyes still drinking in the sight.

When he managed to look away, it was only to find Taehyung already looking at him. Smile exceedingly genuine and ear-splitting.

He felt barely conscious when he cupped Taehyung’s perfectly heart-shaped face. Taehyung’s expression didn’t dim, didn’t give away if he knew how badly Jimin wanted to kiss him. And goodness did Jimin ever want to kiss Taehyung. He found himself at the precipice, a breath away from kissing Taehyung, at least once every few days.

He pressed his forehead to Taehyung’s instead, shutting his eyes. He wouldn’t kiss Taehyung out of the blue.

Taehyung’s laughter was effervescent.

“Jimin, look, it’s snowing!”

“Oh, yeah,” he agreed once he’d opened his eyes and pulled back.

Even though he hadn’t yet managed to look away from Taehyung’s happy, glimmering eyes.

They held onto one another on their way back to Hogwarts, careful not to slip on the layer of ice underneath the slowly accumulating snow. Jimin had to remind himself that the right time would come. He would find the perfect moment to share with Taehyung that he wanted their future to be one they build together. And he would finally kiss Taehyung. 

May 21, 2014

Who would have thought such an innocuous comment could have rooted in Taehyung’s heart such an unrelenting idea.

Come seventh year, Taehyung had finally felt ready to pick his own electives. Unfortunately, he had missed the boat. Sixth year choices dictating course load for seventh year, too. Taehyung was signed up to write the NEWTs, but with little use for his results, he had spent a lot of his last year at Hogwarts on extracurricular activities — which had indeed meant spending time away from Jimin, who used every free minute to study. The result was largely the same as picking different electives.

One of these activities was volunteering to help with the upkeep of Hogwarts’ greenhouses.

That was precisely where the comment had been made. Days ago, during a full Saturday at the greenhouses. Jimin had shown up around lunch time, Taehyung’s favourites packed up so that he wouldn’t need to waste time travelling to the Great Hall.

Eden had said:

“I wish someone loved me that much.”

Jimin had either not heard or chosen not to hear, instead going over each element in the boxed meal. Taehyung had heard and had paid close attention to Namjoon’s response in the background.

“I’m afraid that only comes after years of work.”

As he’d taken a seat in the corner of the greenhouse to eat his lunch, he’d considered the words. Namjoon’s hadn’t felt very important. Nothing about his relationship with Jimin had ever been describable as “work”.

His classmate’s words, however, had made a huge impact.

With frightening suddenness and certainty, it dawned on Taehyung that this was the one instance where his love was met with its mirror image. Jimin’s love an equal measure to Taehyung’s. The thing he’d dreamt of throughout the entirety of his secondary schooling. Being loved in its truest sense.

Thus, since Saturday, Taehyung had been obsessed with the idea that Jimin was the greatest love of his life.

Which meant confessing, like the dozens who had done so before him. The only person who hadn’t failed miserably before him had been perfect Jia, who hadn’t even met Jimin’s standards in the end. The second date had never come, and Taehyung had never been told why.

Taehyung wasn’t quite fearful. There wouldn’t be any fallout if Jimin didn’t see their bond as having the potential of being a romance for the ages. Jimin’s love was unconditional, Taehyung had found out as much when they’d started sixth year. Not a shadow of anger or resentment for Taehyung who’d kept his loudest feelings and fears secret from him. An opposite reaction to his parents, who he’d always hoped actually loved him unconditionally.

This time, he didn’t want to keep his feelings to himself. With graduation ticking closer, and Jimin receiving conditional offer after conditional offer for top healing programs around the globe, he had a vested interest in making sure Jimin knew Taehyung saw and wanted a future for the two of them.

It was a difficult subject to broach in the midst of NEWTs.

There were no examinations scheduled for today though, and Taehyung wanted to get it over with. He’d tucked his confession letter into his potions textbook — potions being their next NEWT. So far, he’d spent most of their studying session pretending to be asleep.

Lying flat on his stomach on the warmed grass, arms crossed over his textbook, he shut his eyes and mentally reviewed every word he’d selected for his letter. Who was to say his confession would hold a candle to any of the ones that had come before?

“Taehyung?” Jimin poked at his waist with the end of his wand. “I think that’s enough rest. You don’t want to mess up your sleep schedule the day before an exam, do you?”

He sighed deeply in response, then raised his head to glare at Jimin. He had no doubt his face gave away the fact that he hadn’t been sleeping at all.

“Jimin.” Better to make the jump. “I’m sorry, but I can’t study until you’ve read this.”

Immediately, Jimin scooted over to be directly by Taehyung’s side, face openly curious. “Oh? Did you prepare questions on the material?”

“No, not really…”

“Oh! Did you find a new practice exam? I could have sworn I’d found everything available.”

With a silent sigh, Taehyung shut his textbook, then let it fall back open to the page where he’d hidden away the sealed envelope.

“No, it’s this.”

Jimin didn’t hesitate, picking up the envelope with furrowed eyebrows. “Ok. Let’ see.”

He tore the seal cleanly, unfolded the carefully folded piece of parchment.

Taehyung had once read a romance novel where the protagonist had sprayed her love letters with her perfume, so her lover would be reminded of her from the scent alone. Taehyung, anxious, had done the same — all the while conscious that Jimin surely wouldn’t recognize it at all. He’d probably only ever worn his perfume at two or three end of year Hogwarts feasts. Still, as Jimin held the letter, Taehyung wondered if he would notice the fragrance.

For a few seconds, Jimin’s eyes flew over the parchment. Quickly, however, he glanced back at Taehyung over the letter. Taehyung, caught off guard, weakly shrugged his shoulders and flattened out his mouth.

“Thank you for loving me as much as I love you,” Jimin read out loud, tone almost questioning. Taehyung resisted the urge to put his hands over his ears. Jimin continued, though with his eyes set on Taehyung. Almost as if he’d been able to memorize the contents of the letter at a glance alone. “When we’re together, it feels like every moment is worth living to its fullest.”

“Jimin, please. It’s going to sound better in your inner voice,” Taehyung nearly begged, mortified at hearing his own written confession.

“It’ll sound even better in your voice.” He put the letter down over his lap. “Why are you handing me a letter like this? Wouldn’t you rather just tell me?”

Taehyung considered it for a moment, but only lasted a few seconds staring at Jimin, hair and eyes both a dangerous silver today.

“No, I wouldn’t. I’m not good with words. And if you need time to process, you’ll have the letter for reference.”

“Why would I need time to process that you love me?” Jimin sounded amused.

“That you’re the one source of love that matters to me and that I want to be your biggest source of love, too.”

“Aren’t we already like that?” Jimin asked, now teasing.

Taehyung shut the textbook with finality. Looking out towards the lake, he spoke gravely.

“You told my parents about, if you were to start a life with someone. You definitely did, and you talked about whether they’d need to travel for work. But, I just. I want to be that person you have a life with.”

Despite Taehyung’s serious demeanour, Jimin still had a strange quirk to his lips and twinkle in his eyes.

“You want to live together? Decorate and take care of our home however we want? And get married? And raise kids? And tell each other we love each other an obnoxious amount of times in a day?”

“Yes, ok? You wouldn’t need to ask if you just read the letter,” Taehyung snapped out, irritated by Jimin’s lighthearted response to his confession.

Perhaps he was one of many to fail, but the light way Jimin treated it made him feel ridiculed.

To add salt to the wound, Jimin answered with, “I had kind of figured anyway.”

“Fine, hand it back if you don’t need it.” Taehyung put his hand out, features hard.

“No way, I’m keeping my first love letter from you.”

“Why would I send you any other?”

He’d kept his hand out, but it fell with Jimin’s next words.

“You’re really going to be a husband who sends me no love notes?”

“I…”

Taehyung pressed his lips back together, resigned that he was at a loss for words, as well as at a loss for how to feel. Should he be confused by what Jimin meant? Should he be mad that Jimin was teasing him during a vulnerable moment? Or should he have been happy because it sounded more and more like the confession wasn’t a big deal simply because Jimin felt the same way.

“Oh, my baby bear,” Jimin reached forward to cup Taehyung cheek, and Taehyung of course leaned into it. He was defenceless against the bear nickname, which was only used by Jimin nowadays. “Of course you’re the person I want to start a life with. Why’d you doubt that?”

“How was I supposed to know that?”

He crossed his arms over his chest and pulled away from Jimin’s touch, embarrassment prevailing over the rising sense of excitement.

“Oh… Oops,” Jimin laughed, though it sounded like an apology. “Not sure why I did anymore, but I really thought that when you’d realize your feelings, you’d also realize that I already knew about them.”

“What? Wait, no, what?”

Eden’s words had planted the seed, but then again the plant it had grown into had been nothing out of the ordinary. The space Jimin took in his life predominant since the very beginning. But Taehyung hadn’t yet thought of it in terms of “realizing” or even “recognizing” his feelings.

“I’ve known since like fifth year… When I showed up that summer, I wanted to take you out on a date to help you realize, but, well… You know how the rest of that story goes.”

Taehyung decided not to let his thoughts linger on that summer. He now subscribed to the thought that time healed all wounds, but generally he decided not to pick at this particular scab.

“And you feel the same?”

“I’ve always felt that way.” Jimin tilted his head cutely, almost as if it were confusing for Taehyung to reach any other conclusion. “ I didn’t know you felt the same at first.”

“Why didn’t you say anything?”

Jimin smiled, an expression Taehyung was more familiar with. Fond and patient.

“I honestly didn’t mind. I think we’ve already been building that future together, even as best friends only. I thought you’d be ready eventually and, see? I was right!”

Taehyung considered the turn of the conversation, frowning silently as he tried to make sense of it. Then, decidedly, kneeled and scooted forward towards Jimin.

“Ok, yes. Hold on. Let’s just…”

He cupped Jimin’s face, and watched as Jimin smiled eagerly. He thought back to the number of times Jimin had done the same to him throughout the year, and had looked much more intense than Taehyung had felt. He tried to ignore the embarrassment of only just figuring out it was because Jimin had meant to — or at the very least had wanted to — kiss him.

He leaned down, and only pressed their mouths together when he noticed how Jimin had closed his eyes gently, angled his face perfectly.

Despite everything, Taehyung had not often thought of kissing another. He wasn’t really sure what to do with himself. He wasn’t sure Jimin did either, as he clutched at the front of Taehyung’s robes. The feeling of inexperience seemed minuscule, however, to the feeling of kissing the person he’d held such strong feelings for for so long.

One kiss turned into many, even after the strain in Taehyung’s thighs had become too much and he’d let himself fall back into the grass. Jimin had still found a way into his arms, and their lips collided again, in increasingly comfortable kisses.

Afterwards, they ignored their textbooks in favour of watching the skies. Jimin pointed out a long, winding cloud, comparing it to a snake.

Then, softly like the words were meant for Taehyung only, said: “I’m so lucky I was sorted into Slytherin.”

That had been something Taehyung had thought of often throughout his teen years. How would they have been, the two of them, had they been in different houses? Perhaps totally unchanged, but Taehyung suspected that was untrue. Jimin, his roommate who held him in his arms throughout the night whenever Taehyung felt upset. He would have missed out on that and so much more had the sorting gone differently.

Taking a deep breath, then exhaling slowly, Taehyung answered.

“I used to think my sorting was the worst thing to happen to me. But, it was the best.”

When he’d had the thought in previous years, he had felt guilty. How could driving a wedge between him and his family ever be the best thing in his life? He was more confident now, and knew it was true. He had grown into the person he’d always been meant to be, and had come together with his soulmate.

Jimin hummed, but Taehyung could hear in even that that the other was touched. He turned his head at the same time as Jimin did. Instead of smiling back at Jimin, he pressed a quick, warm kiss to his lips.

“Being in Slytherin house was temporary, but now you’re stuck with me permanently, ok?” Jimin asked, equal parts teasing and looking for Taehyung’s reassurance.

“Ok,” Taehyung answered, easily.