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Tatsumi had a small issue that no amount of prayer could fix. While being a holy man, he has always prided himself on resisting temptation, even in his worst moments of sickness and ailments. He doesn’t drink, and he never smokes. He has never dated a woman (or with recent realizations, a man) . He doesn't so much as glance at his coworkers in a way that is unholy.
Well, until recently. Lately, his thoughts have been so preoccupied with a certain violet-haired person. Seriously, it astounds him that Ayase Mayoi thinks of themselves the way they do.He can’t help but stare when he directs the dance practice, or when they sneak around showing the rest of them secret passageways, his shirt riding up. Or their gloves..
Lord, he’s in deep.
He’s unsure of what he’s been taught now, years of pressure to marry a woman, to remain pure until marriage ingrained into every fiber of his being. But he wondered, would they really mind if he brought somebody like Mayoi home, as long as he kept his vow? As long as he’s happy? Wouldn't a pure love still be right in the eyes of god?
It’s not like he has the time to do more than fawn anyway, Alkaloid has been working so hard with recent promotions that Tatsumi barely has time to rest his head, nevermind swooning over his unit mate. But Mayoi has been patient and, now that he's gotten used to the rest of the group, sweet and playful. He has plenty of moments that he keeps tucked away in the recesses of his heart, smiles and blushes and seriousness-
“Tattsun-senpai, come on! Mayo-san said that they don’t want us to be late!” Aira interrupted his thoughts and startled him a little bit.
Ah, they did have choreography practice didn’t they? The past few days have really been a blur, and his leg twitches disdainfully as he slips on the knee brace that Mayoi had gotten for him a few months ago. It’s a soft purple, and extremely comfortable. Tatsumi can’t help but smile happily at the memory of them almost taking it back in fear of rejection. But there’s no time to reminisce, so he hoists himself up and tries to keep up with Aira’s pace.
Practice is…torture. It’s summer so he didn’t exactly expect Mayoi to be in their usual shirt and gloves. But there's no reason for him to be affected by a simple set of shorts and what looks to be his own shirt. Oh, they’re wearing his shirt-
“A-ah! Tatsumi-san! I’m deeply sorry for wearing your clothes, I put my laundry in late and had nothing else to wear! Someone as lowly as me shouldn’t have even considered it! I’ll take it off right now-” The last sentence quickly draws tatsumi from staring at the way the hem of the shirt meets Mayoi’s thighs. “It’s truly alright, I’m very glad to have been of help in some way during your time of need. Please, keep it as long as you’d like, alright?”
Having thick skin blesses Tatsumi from having any visible reaction at the thought of Mayoi casually lounging in his shirt, and he quickly strides into the practice room “But regardless, let us get started, yes?”
*********************
For someone so shy and forlorn, Mayoi sure is a strict instructor. Although his knee bothers him a bit, the rest of Tatsumi’s body has the pleasant ache that comes with hard work. Practice had gone on for hours, but he couldn’t say that he noticed with how much he was staring. He gingerly sat on his bed and smiled at Hiiro and Aira wrestling in Hiiro’s bed.
“I was just saying that knowing idols favorite sweets is strange Aira!”
“What would you know Hiiro, you’re practically a country bumpkin!”
“Well yes! I grew up there!”
Despite the harsh words the two were still giggling, so Tatsumi decided to lie back and relax just as Mayoi gingerly sat next to him on the bed. “Good job on the practice Mayoi-san, you were pretty strict today hm?” Only a light tease, but Mayoi of course gets flustered regardless. “I-I’m sorry if I pushed you too hard Tatsumi-san! I had just wanted everything to be perfect but my worthless self couldn’t even do that much right..” Tatsumi gently rolled over to perch his head on their knee, the simple affection quieting them easily. “You fret too much. The Lord says to not worry and place your burden on Him.” A yawn interrupts his tangent, and he blearily watches as Mayoi’s hand stutters slightly before settling to card fingers through his hair. They both casually watch their kouhai set up something to watch on the tv.
This is relatively new, casually having affection easily and readily available. Even in the church, he mostly had hugs from his mother and the occasional shoulder clasp from his father, small things like this weren’t exactly acknowledged, but certainly frowned upon. Tatsumi pushed himself further in Mayoi’s lap at the memory, smugly relishing in this small moment of rebellion.
They stayed together until it was finally Mayoi’s turn to shower, then he offered to help him with his laundry (to save time of course, not because he felt particularly clingy or anything) The two carry a small basket each as they walked down the dorm's hallway before Mayoi spoke.
“I am truly sorry about having to take your shirt, I’ll buy you a new one even.” Tatsumi can’t hold back the fondness that leaks into his smile at the sentiment. “It really is nothing Mayoi, if anything you can keep it.” Mayoi shook his head, though he was smiling a little. “You’re really too kind..T-tatsumi.” Tatsumi felt himself freeze at his name being spoken casually, a sentiment not typically reciprocated.
“Tatsumi-san?”
“Hm?”
They fiddled with their shirt nervously before speaking. “Will youu..meet me in the gardens tomorrow? I’d like to discuss something. If that’s okay.” Tatsumi felt his heart rate increase slightly as he smiled. “Of course, at lunch then?” Mayoi nodded and quickly uttered an apology for the trouble before speeding ahead to the dorm, leaving Tatsumi wondering what exactly was going on.
*********************
The bench near the camellias, the bench near the camellias, the bench-
Tatsumi repeated the words in his head as he walked to the garden. He knows the way, but it's either reciting the spot or breaking into prayer, which would take him too much time. Mayoi didn’t specify what he wanted to speak about, yet Tatsumi can’t shake the nerves in his stomach. It’s an odd sensation, as he has felt panic and fear, but never the vague swirling of apprehension.
Mayoi somehow looks even more gorgeous than usual somehow, hair braided more tightly but bangs still framing his face with a curl. They don’t seem to have noticed him yet, and he decides to sit down casually, startling them. “T-T-Tatsumi-san!! I’m sorry I couldn’t hear you, how rude of me to not notice!” “It’s fine, I wanted to see if I could startle you~” They flush, and turn their head resolutely at the flowers, although Tatsumi caught a glimpse of a badly repressed smile. “You’re so cruel for a holy man Tatsumii” He couldn’t help but smile at their pout.
After a bit of light small talk, Tatsumi finally decides to bite the bullet. “Mayoi, why exactly did you want to meet with me today? Not that I mind at all, but I’m sure you wouldn't typically relax with me in a secluded area.” The question sends Mayoi spluttering with a litany of half aborted sentences before he simply hides his face in his hands. “M-may I be frank then?” Ignoring the slight bubble of nervousness as he nods placidly.
“I like you! I really really like you and I’m very unworthy to do so but I can’t pretend without feeling like even more of a dirty sinner! I don’t need a response, I only ask that you forgive me, I’m so sorry…” Tatsumi ends up a little dumbfounded as he processes what was said, before he ends up giggling a little gleefully. “Oh- Oh wow Mayoi I-pahahaha!” He quickly clasps the shorter man’s hand and happily shakes it. “I’m sorry for my laughter, it's just..I’ve liked you this whole time as well! I thought you’d have no interest and, wow I can’t believe it.”
Mayoi held his hand just as easily, aside from red ears. “You’re crazy if you think I couldn’t have an interest in you Tatsumi. You’re perfect-” as if just realizing their situation, his whole face blazes a fiery red. “Although u-um..what do you..w-want us to be?”
Tatsumi felt his own face heat up as he finally, finally, shyly pressed a kiss to the mole he thinks about so much. “I believe this makes us boyfriends my love~”