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Tucked away in the cove of a small island, the Revenge bobbed along with the gentle waves and light breeze.
They had made anchor for the night.
It was scary story night, after all. Everyone loved scary story night. By now, Stede had likely realized that and determined it would be best to make a quick stop for the night so they didn’t have any more almost-running-aground incidents. Or actual running aground incidents.
Really, it was only the one time.
After the first time.
Regardless, it was decided that during any special bed-time story events, they would find a nice spot to lay anchor so that there would be no danger of anyone getting distracted from their duties. Everyone was welcome to just sit and enjoy whatever the evening had in store.
“And once he pulled the end of the silk ribbon, freeing it from its place around his beloved’s neck,” Stede paused for effect, “her head tumbled down to the floor!”
As he watched, mouth in an open smile and hands spread wide, the tension amongst his crew immediately dissipated. He followed soon after, looking disappointed but not at all surprised.
“Captain, that isn’t really scary,” Oluwande piped up.
“How does it even make sense? Wouldn’t her blood spray out everywhere if her head got cut off? Don’t know how a little ribbon would stop that.” Wee John added.
“Probably one of those living-dead creatures. They don’t have any of their own blood so they steal it from others,” Frenchie informed him. “The man should have a look at his own neck.”
A few of the group nodded, as if Frenchie’s explanation made the story much clearer to them. Of course, it didn’t make them scared, but they appreciated the information all the same.
Stede huffed, crossing his arms. “I think you all just don’t appreciate true horror.”
His bottom lip just barely pushed out as his crew continued to pick apart the story he had just told. Ed, who had been sitting in his usual spot next to him, placed a gentle hand on his knee.
“I liked it,” He reassured his co-captain.
The two gazed into each others’ eyes for a brief moment, each looking away with slightly warmer cheeks as a voice called out in their direction.
“How about you, Blackbeard? Do you know a scary story?” The designated ‘Ask Blackbeard For a Story’ crewmember piped up - this time it was the Swede.
As was the tradition of Stede’s un-scary story on scary story night, one had also developed to ask Ed for his own contribution. A much scarier contribution. That first tale of the Kraken, however altered it may have been, seemed to have made a lasting impression. So there Ed was, a somewhat permanent contribution to scary story night.
“Well,” Ed dropped his voice low, taking a drag off his pipe and blowing out the smoke. It was all in the ambiance with his stories. “Have I ever told you about the time I worked aboard a haunted vessel?”
Everyone, even Stede (especially Stede), was immediately caught up in the tale that was about to be told.
A few days after their brief overnight stop, the inhabitants of the Revenge found themselves docked near a small merchant town.
They hadn’t planned on stopping anywhere until the next major port, but supplies were dwindling faster than planned so a mini restock was necessary. Buttons had known about the town and had suggested it. He had informed Stede that it didn’t have much, but would prove to be sufficient.
Well, that was what Stede had taken his first mate to mean. Buttons did have a penchant for being rather cryptic with his descriptions.
But that was enough for him, which was enough for Ed, which was enough to rid the rest of the crew of any lingering doubts present.
It turned out to be quite the suggestion.
The town square had a large mound of wood in the center of it and there were autumnal-themed decorations everywhere. Street vendors were setting up stalls all around, draping bits of red- and orange-dyed cloth on their tables.
“Excuse me,” Stede called to a passing woman. “Is there a festival going on here today?”
The woman’s gaze flicked about the large group of men, clearly uneasy, but answered anyway. “It’s All Hallow’s Eve, sir.”
Stede smiled at her, as kindly as he could. “I see! Thank you for filling us in, madam. We just came in to purchase a few items. I would feel horribly embarrassed if we intruded on your lovely town and had no idea of any festivities going on.”
“It’s nothing fancy, sir. Just a normal celebration. A bonfire and sweets and the like,” she inhaled suddenly, furrowed her brows, and drew a hand to her mouth. “Although. I would advise against going outside the town square.”
“Oh?” Stede asked, his confusion echoed in hums and head tilts from those around him.
“Well, it's just that there’s spirits roaming tonight, sir. Especially up at the old mansion on the hill.”
“Old mansion on the hill?” Ed asked, bringing himself into the conversation.
The woman nodded and pointed to her side. The group followed her movement and squinted. There, in the not too far off distance, likely just on the outskirts of the main town, sat an old looking and very large house. Even from their vantage point, they could all see how it had fallen into disrepair.
“They say unholy things haunt the halls of that place,” the woman muttered, clutching the shawl she wore tighter to her chest. “Nobody goes there.”
An uneasy silence fell over the group of people, her words holding far too serious of a tone for them to be easily brushed off.
“Well,” Stede cleared his throat. “Thank you for the warning madam. We appreciate all of your help.”
Ed and the crew mumbled their thanks to her and she made her exit, continuing on the path she had been on previously. When she was finally out of earshot, Ed took a few steps until he was standing in front of Stede and the crew.
“We’re absolutely breaking into that mansion,” he announced, just loud enough so that only those in the group could hear him.
“Ed-” Stede began, but was quickly cut off.
The crew broke out into excited cheers and whoops. Their agreement to the plan was overwhelming, drowning out any pushback Stede might have had.
It was the perfect target. Sure, the place was old and probably crumbling but the only town near it was very superstitious of it. Essentially it was a box of treasure that was being shunned. The town might as well have painted ‘Rob Me’ in bright red right across the front of it. It was a chance they couldn’t give up, they all knew it. Haunted-Shmaunted!
Well, at least that was what Ed had said when several of the crew tried to raise concerns about the home’s alleged spiritual occupants.
“It’s fine everyone. Blackbeard has experience with ghosts. He’ll handle it,” Pete reminded them all.
“Totally,” Ed said confidently, although a hint of nervousness crossed his face for just a fraction of a second.
“Alright, then. Let’s get stocked up so we can be ready to head out again by evening,” Stede finally conceded.
Another round of cheers went up amongst the crew. They dispersed rather quickly to carry out their assigned errands and Stede took Ed to look around town.
He had suggested teaching him about the concept of window shopping. Though if Ed ended up with a few things rather than just looking and yearning, Stede didn’t seem to mind. If Stede walked away with a few items of his own - ‘Why the fuck would you actually buy it and not just take it? We’re pirates, mate.’ - lawfully gained or otherwise, well, who was Ed to care about that? He’d just taught him the perfect stealing methods. It just proved more that their symbiotic teaching experience was working just the way it should be.
As the crew, Stede, and Ed stood in front of the decrepit mansion, they began to wonder if they should have heeded the woman’s warnings.
“This place is so not right,” Frenchie mumbled, eyes shifting wildly around.
“Aye. There be demons present here.” Buttons spoke ominously, chin tilted upwards.
The Swede squeaked, “Demons?” almost inaudibly.
Most of the crew had come on the impromptu raid, plus Ed and Stede. Unfortunately, the two more level-headed members elected to stay behind along with the remaining duo from Ed’s crew.
“Buck up, gang! Ghosts aren’t real. Let’s get on with it!” Stede called back to his crew, only a little bit snarky, and marched toward the door.
Ed quickly followed after agreeing with a hesitant, “Yeah. Ghosts aren’t real,” and a scoff.
Whether it was Stede’s confidence or Ed charging forward, those that came followed suit. Pete led quickly behind Ed, practically dragging Lucius beside him. They were followed by Roach and Buttons, trailed finally by Frenchie and the Swede.
After some effort, the party managed to get the heavy wooden door to open. To (nearly) everyone’s dismay it opened with a terrifying creeaaakkkkkk as it swung slowly inward. Stede was the only one who looked positively delighted, clapping his hands and urging them in. When nobody moved from their places, he heaved a dramatic sigh and took the first step into the abandoned home.
“Honestly! It’s just an abandoned building!”
That was quite evident. Everything was covered in a thick layer of dust, and there were cobwebs in every nook, cranny, and corner. Stede found himself walking into them several times, as did everyone else.
Surprisingly, it seemed like the place really had been left alone. There were very expensive looking items everywhere they turned. Stede was alight with joy from the luck they had. They all would have been, if they weren’t one weird noise away from pissing their pants from fear.
As they were inspecting the parlor, a clatter sounded in the room.
Everyone stood stock still.
“Oh my god,” Lucius whispered, terrified.
He pointed to a side of the room, entirely devoid of people. On the floor was a small oil portrait of a woman, miraculously face up. It was as if it had been pushed from the short side table it was set on top of mere moments before.
The parlor was eerily silent, hands tightly clutching the sacks half-filled with stolen valuables. The tension was incredibly thick. One could hardly breathe.
Tap tap tap.
A noise rapidly sounded from a window and echoed around the room.
The Swede and Lucius shrieked, Buttons leapt into the air, and Frenchie, Roach, and Pete simply booked it out of the room. Of course, this led to Lucius running out of the room, which led to the Swede following Lucius. Before anyone could check on him, Buttons had practically vanished into thin air.
“Well then,” Stede said, clearing his throat. “Just a touch dramatic, I think.”
“Mhmm,” Was all Ed offered in response, stiffly nodding his head.
“Are you alright?”
“Mhmm.”
Stede narrowed his eyes, suspicious. “Okay,” he paused. “Shall we look upstairs?”
Ed gave his co-captain another stiff nod. Stede decided not to comment on it. At least Ed seemed to be able to walk perfectly fine, if not just slightly less casual than usual, so up the stairs the two went.
On their way, a haunting, howling noise reverberated through the house. Ed let out a yelp and crashed into Stede’s side, latching onto his arm.
A giggle bubbled out of Stede’s chest, “Ed, you can’t be serious! You actually believe this place is inhabited by some lingering spirit?”
“There are fucking ghosts in here, Stede. I know a ghost when I see it. This is a fucking ghost.” Ed spoke through his clenched teeth.
“Oh, don’t be ridiculous Ed. It was just the wind.”
Despite Stede’s insistence on the (allegedly fearless) pirate’s silly thoughts, he didn’t remove his arm from his grasp. In fact, he even looped his other arm around Ed’s shoulders to guide him along the rest of the way up the stairs and into the first interesting room they found. Only to help ease Ed’s nerves, of course.
The first room that held anything of note happened to be on the third floor. It was some type of office but it had quite a few silver and even gold items that Stede and Ed eagerly shoved into their bags.
“I can’t see shit up here,” Ed grumbled, bringing something close to his face to inspect it before tossing it behind him.
Stede hummed his agreement. “Let me see if there are any good matches around here.”
There were definitely candles, even if they were old and dusty, but Stede only needed something to light them with. He searched through a few drawers of a desk, finding a few more things to shove into his sack of stolen treasures along his way, but no matches.
It turned out he was just looking in the wrong place. Whoever the owner of the mansion had been had put them in a jar up on the fireplace.
He struck one of the matches, bringing it to the wick of a candle and watching as it caught the flame. He blew out the match and made a ‘ta-da’ motion with his hands at the candle. Ed seemed mildly impressed, muttering his appreciation for the light.
“See? Not so scary with a bit of light, right?” Stede asked, only slightly teasing.
Ed scoffed and shrugged, a bit difficult with how tightly he was crossing his arms. “Pfft. Yeah. Not scary at all.”
Stede stepped closer, placing a reassuring hand on Ed’s shoulder. Some of the tension eased out of his body and features, a small breath escaping his nose. Over the dim flicker of the candle, the two stared at each other. The world seemed to disappear around them as Stede gave a soft smile, Ed having forgotten about his fear enough to return it. The alleged spirit erased from memory for the moment.
Stede gave the shoulder under his palm a squeeze before letting his hand trail down Ed’s bicep and back down to his side. The two seemed to be drifting closer together, both barely visible in the faint light of the candle.
Quite suddenly, though, the flame next to them got snuffed out. The only thing breaking the quiet of the room was a quiet, frustrated-sounding whisper.
Stede, his arm reaching back up to try to find Ed again, whispered out to him. “Ed, was that you? Did you say something?”
“Oh, fuck this. I’m leaving.”
“What about the loot?”
“Fuck the loot. I am not about to get killed by a fucking ghost in some no-name merchant village. That is not how I die.”
Ed began marching toward the door they came in through. He had abandoned the sack of old, dusty, stolen items and was now solely focused on his escape from the house.
“Oh, Ed, don't be dramatic!” Stede called, trailing after him.
Ed grunted in frustration, pushing on the door and wiggling the handle. He slammed his body up against it, to no avail.
“It’s not fucking opening,” He said, glaring at it.
“Maybe it’s a pull, not a push?” Stede suggested, only succeeding in getting Ed to direct his angry gaze at him. “Let me give it a go.”
Ed stepped back, once again crossing his arms over his chest and tensing his body. He swiveled his head around sporadically, looking in a different direction every few seconds as Stede fiddled with the door.
“Odd,” Stede hummed as he took a step back and placed a hand to his chin. “It appears as if it’s been locked.”
“This is such bullshit! ” Ed yelled. “Fuck this. I’m going out the window.”
Stede’s brain hadn’t fully caught up to the statement until Ed had already made it halfway to the other side of the room.
“Ed! You can’t jump out of the window. we’re three stories up!”
“Do you have any better ideas? Because I would really love to hear them.”
“Well,” Stede paused, looking back toward the door.
“Exactly. Plus, I’m sure there are some footholds on the side of this crumbling house, so I’ll be perfectly fine.”
Ed pried open the old window with a groan. The side of the house really was crumbling, it was incredibly unsafe. Ed didn’t seem to care about that at that moment, though. He leaned slightly over the window sill, figuring out the best way to scale down the side with the least amount of injury.
Stede stuttered in his steps toward him, opening his mouth to shout more protests for the terrible escape plan, when the door behind them burst open with a loud bang. The two yelled, Ed reflexively pulling his dagger and Stede clutching at his chest.
There, standing in the door, was a figure of a young man.
“Please don’t jump out the window,” he said.
“Lucius?” Stede said, confusion lacing his tone.
Several more figures came into view, a few holding lanterns, and they flooded into the room.
“We just wanted to have a bit of fun scaring Captain Bonnet. We didn’t think you would get scared, Blackbeard,” Pete said.
“Yeah, who knew Captain was such a skeptic, huh?” Roach elbowed Frenchie, who looked quite put-off.
Stede also looked quite upset, taking up the stance he always did when he was disappointed in the crew. “I cannot believe you would do this,” he started. “Ed nearly jumped out of a window! What would you have done if he had injured himself?”
The group of pirates began to sag, murmuring ‘sorries’ and trying to give various excuses, but Stede held firm. Ed, on the other hand, did not.
He let out a rather loud laugh and stalked forward, standing next to Stede and facing the crew. “Fucking brilliant! How did you do it?”
Emboldened by the praise, the group dove into explaining their fuckery.
The story the woman told them had given them the idea, and they went from there. Lucius and the Swede were kept out of the plan to raise the authenticity (and because they were the worst at keeping secrets), but were brought in once they left the parlor. The portrait had been tugged down with a string Frenchie had tied to it when he had gone past it earlier - Ed and Stede were very focused on a cabinet that held some very nice crystal glassware so it was quite easy. Jim had followed behind them to take part, tapping on the window once Pete signaled them. After that, it was all about getting out, following the two to whichever room they chose, and barricading them in.
The candle was unexpected, but they worked with it. Apparently the house was so dilapidated, there was a rather significant hole in the wall and Stede and Ed had stood right next to it. That allowed them to blow out the candle, but apparently not on cue (Lucius was quite adamant about that part, shooting a glare at the Swede), and the scribe had accidentally scolded his crewmate, inadvertently alerting the captains to their presence. They hadn’t seemed to recognize his voice though, and tried to get out.
Unfortunately, they hadn’t been ready for them to leave yet, so hadn’t gotten the door unjammed.
“You know the rest,” Lucius stated, waving a hand.
Stede hummed, still a bit upset at what had nearly happened but not entirely unimpressed. “I suppose I have to give you some points for working together in a creative way.”
“An incredible way. Scared the shit out of me.” Ed laughed as he clapped Stede’s shoulder.
A quiet chuckle rippled throughout the crew. They all seemed incredibly pleased with themselves, but were holding back.
“Yes. Well. Perhaps we should finish up what we actually came here for?” Stede looked around, eyebrows raised.
“Well, we didn’t come here just to leave empty handed, did we?” Ed replied, a mischievous grin growing on his face.
The crew all grew their own smiles and, with a clap from Stede, they all spread out and began ransacking the old mansion once more.
The festival in the small town was in full swing, even late into the night.
The Revenge crew, as well as Ed and Stede had gotten their fill of the sweets being passed out by vendors along the main square and were celebrating their successful raid turned fuckery (turned raid) in the local pub.
“This crew you’ve got is really something else, y’know that?” Ed told Stede, leaning over in his chair.
“Oh?”
“They’re just,” Ed sighed, taking a swig of ale. “Fun.”
Stede smiled, drinking from his own tankard. “Indeed they are.”
Ed nudged him with his knee, smiling. “Especially their captain.”
Stede chuckled. “I think they like you better though.”
“Then they’re fools.”
Stede stared down into his drink, a light blush forming on his cheeks.
The night continued on with drinks, sweets, and festivities. It was a perfect night, with perfect company, and the only thing they had to return to was the lovely ship they resided in and the large amount of loot they had stored away.
Truly, they couldn’t ask for better.