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"Brother!" Naomi called aTanizaki, jumping right up on his shoulders. The two were sitting in a park having lunch. Naomi had said that she was in the mood for something salty, so Tanizaki decided to take her out to eat.
"What do you want Naomi?" He asked a little despondently while eating the last piece of food he had in hands.
"What do you think of Atsushi-kun? When Dazai brought him in I really wondered where he was thinking." The girl shifted around Tanizaki, hugging him and squeezing him against her own body. Tanizaki took a deep breath and shrugged.
“He seems like a good boy,” He muttered back, not caring. Now Tanizaki crumpled the napkin in his hands and successfully tossed it into a garbage can beside the benches.
"Neee’" She smiled now laying her head on her brother's shoulder.
It didn't take long for the two to get up and go back to the agency, this despite Naomi's protests who kept trying to pull Tanizaki back to the benches, however, despite his sister easily convincing him, this time he knew he had work to do.
However, Naomi's question made Junichiro wonder on the way back, what did he really think of Atsushi?
Well he was really kind and helped him when he needed it, Atsushi was a good boy. Tanizaki was sure he was someone good to get close to, Atsushi conveyed something so good, a feeling of almost peace, that he hadn't felt able to feel for a long time. Many times he caught himself looking at Atsushi from afar, the way he smiled, acted, talked, it was all so sweet, so kind, he felt the breath when it all, all that set, was destined for him. It was almost unbelievable.
Still thinking about it, Tanizaki can barely notice when he and Naomi arrived at the agency. He was surprised by Kunikida and Atsushi waiting for him. He and Atsushi had been assigned a mission, he didn't get much information about it, he was told that Nakajima would explain it on the way, Tanizaki suspected that they might want to test one more time how he and Atsushi performed together as a duo — Although Naomi made it that a threesome.
However, today, they made Naomi stay at the agency. Junichiro wasn't sure why, but he was told that it was a mission that three people wouldn't work out well. The redhead decided not to question it, and soon he and Atsushi were out of the agency, on their way to the designated place.
Atsushi didn't seem to want to rush his steps, which made Tanizaki wonder, if it was an important mission why didn't they run? He didn't understand, so he decided to ask.
“Atsushi…” Tanizaki called not too loudly, having Atsushi's quick gaze falling on him, “You didn't tell me much about the mission… But shouldn't we go faster?" Nakajima's eyes widened slightly before softening his expression, shaking his head.
"I think I better tell the truth." He smiled weakly, suddenly stopping walking. Tanizaki looked him up and down confused, Nakajima reassured him with a look and placed and joined his arms behind his back "I wanted to talk to you."
"About what?"
"Something." His voice was still soft, but it didn't sound like a banal "Something..."
Tanizaki once again wondered, what was so important that Kunikida interfered?
Atsushi walked to a park, being accompanied by Junichiro in silence, it was an empty spot, where even the trees shaded and made it a little dark. Nakajima sat down, patting his side lightly on the bench for the redhead to sit down too, which he soon did.
"Then…"
"Tanizaki" The redhead gave a little jump at the way his name was said by Atsushi. Had he done something? “D-dazai would do it in my place, but I wanted to, p-because I care about you. Even if we don't talk much… I apologize in advance for intruding on matters like this, but Ranpo-kun wanted us to talk to you" Atsushi said calmly, but his voice wavered every now and then, it seemed like all his calm was gone as soon as started talking. Tanizaki wasn't quite sure what to say.
"What do you want to talk about?"
"Ah well..." He scratched the back of his neck in agitation. As a gesture of perhaps calming himself, Atsushi took one of Tanizaki's hands and placed it between his, Junichiro blinked a few times and looked away from Atsushi, “Look at me, please."
Tanizaki obeyed.
“Ranpo-san noticed something… Well, he did some time ago. We all realized it actually" It was his turn to look away, but not for long "Tanizaki… Do you… Do you want help?"
The redhead's eyes widened, maybe his brain had stopped working, because nothing but questions crossed his mind. What do you mean… Help? Did he need help? With what?
"What you mean?" He managed to get out the only words that had the most focus on his mind.
“Sorry to get into this matter. Sorry for being insensitive, sorry in advance, but I can't pretend not to see anymore" Once again he apologized, leaving Tanizaki more and more lost, he wanted to understand, why did Atsushi apologize so much? "How long have you and Naomi been… relationships?" He spoke with some difficulty.
Tanizaki swallowed, what was that question? What did he mean? Could not be.
"A-ah..." He squeezed his hand that was still suspended in the air by Atsushi's "I-I..."
"What do you do to make her happy?" Another question, a question that made Tanizaki shudder "How far will you go just for her?"
"W-what is that question? What you mean?" He tried to pull his hands away, failing because he didn't even put in enough force.
“We all know Tanizaki. You accept this situation, you accept this because she is your only family. But you know you can deny it, don't you? That you don't have to force yourself to do something you don't want just for her happiness. She can handle it."
The redhead couldn't notice when he started to shake, having his thoughts, feelings and actions exposed like that was terrifying.
"W-what is this Atsushi? Why are you talking about this?"
“Are you being abused?" Junichiro's eyes grew, even with the shadows of the trees making everything dark, Atsushi could see Tanizaki's eyes fill up, they were glowing in the midst of darkness.
"C-c-of course not... I don't- Of course I..."
“P-please don't lie"
Junichiro sighed. He didn't want to say that looking into Atsushi's eyes, so his head bent down, placing it against his hand now clasped in Atsushi's.
"Me and Naomi... We were always alone, it was always just me and her, I don't know when she started having these kinds of desires for me" His voice trembled, Atsushi realized and took a deep breath knowing something was coming "I don't know when she started to look at me as a man, and no longer as a brother. I don't know what I did to catch her attention".
Tanizaki paused for a few seconds, thinking about how she would say that, it sounded so weird, he felt disgusting. Maybe he didn't get aggressive with that conversation, because Atsushi was sweet, he managed to convey peace, but he could feel that at any moment his extreme dependence, that his defensiveness about Naomi, would show up.
“I… I don't, I don't really like it. I try not to let her do it in public, because I know it's weird. Everybody knows. I just want her to be okay, I hate it, but she is the most important person in my life and I couldn't bear to see her disappointed in me, ever, I don't want to see her look at me with contempt or like I'm not able to fulfill her desires. I cannot allow this. But I understand that the agency feels uncomfortable-"
"No," Atsushi interrupted. One of his hands slipped from Tanizaki's hand, and was brought to his face, lifting his head so that he looked straight into his eyes. The redhead was already crying "It's not about feeling uncomfortable, but everyone there understands that you don't like this situation. Even if it's your choice to accept what she does, it's still abuse because you don't want to, we're all worried. Obviously we didn't take any drastic measures because we know you love her, we know she's your family. But if we don't talk about it, it would be like pretending that the problem doesn't exist". Nakajima spoke seriously, but deep down, there was still his sweetness that was usually present. Tanizaki wanted to hug him, but he felt disgusting, he didn't like that situation, sleeping with Naomi, it was so strange for him.
The redhead didn't say any other words, he didn't know what to say, he had already said the meaning behind that situation, but Atsushi still looked at him as if he still had something to say.
“I-I don't have anything else to say” Junichiro admitted. Atsushi sighed, and he ran his thumb over Tanizaki's face, wiping away the tears that flowed.
“I wanted to go out with you, you know,” Nakajima said suddenly, Tanizaki looked at him confused by the sudden change of subject. "Forgive me if it's not the right time, but I wanted you to know, and I don't know if I'll have many other opportunities alone with you."
“Are you interested in me?!"
"Yeah."
"Even I..." He looked away.
"Yes. And if you want help, either to talk to her, or to deal with what's inside here" Atsushi's hand strayed to Tanizaki's chest, where his heart was "I'm here, the agency is here for you."
Junichiro pondered, he really wanted it to end, but he was afraid of not being enough for Naomi, for him, if she didn't have him completely, it would never be enough.
"B-but what would we do?" He questioned the redhead.
"First we would put her in therapy, because with all due respect, that's not normal" Atsushi said, chuckling, which soon faded when he realized that Tanizaki was still looking at him carefully and with the same expression "You want to try to change that?"
"And I…"
“She'll understand. Don't get me wrong, but she's already put herself in front of two huge guns for you man".
Tanizaki chuckled lightly, nodding in agreement.
"It's true," he sighed.
Hesitantly, Junichiro took Atsushi's hands away from him, and timidly began to fall forward, until his head was on Nakajima's shoulders. Atsushi gladly accepted that contact, his hands going to the red strands in seconds.
"Do you think you'll still have anger issues?" Atsushi asked after a while.
“Only if they hurt her."
"I understand."
Tanizaki took a deep breath. He didn't know how he would handle it, but knowing that he would actually get help out of this situation scared him at the same time it gave him hope. Hope that he could go back to having a sibling relationship with Naomi, that she would go back to being his little sister and not being forced to see her as a woman again, was so depressing.
Atsushi was good, and he was sure he would help him with that, and he would thank the agency later too, everyone who noticed and cared about him. And especially to Atsushi, for being able to see him in a loving way, even knowing the things he did, that he subjected himself to doing.
Tenderly, Najakima stroked his hair, the gentle breeze made him calmer at that moment, or maybe it was just Atsushi, being able to be more calming than the breeze of a sunny day. He felt like going on like this for a long time, after all, he never imagined that he could, at some point, be this close to anyone but Naomi. He felt so good, it wasn't like being with her, where it was a constant discomfort knowing how she saw him. It was sweet, maybe because Atsushi was sweet.
He wants to stay like this forever, but he knows that soon he will have to get up and get up and deal with her. Dealing with this situation that had been going on for too long, he would deal with her nightmare, run away from it, and he would never be in that again, he would never feel disgusting.
Even though he knew deep down, that even if he rubbed his body hard, sores would break out, but he wouldn't feel clean anymore. Maybe time would cleanse him, maybe Atsushi's sweetness would cleanse him, he wants so much.