Chapter Text
There was nothing like the open ocean.
Land could always try to compare, with its beaches and winds and salt scented candles, but it could never live up to the freeness of the water. Plus, Tommy was a little claustrophobic. Towns were just too tight, too many people.
He was forever thankful to his family for raising him on this ship. Tommy hardly left, and never for more than a day. The ocean was his home, and his family, the pirates that sailed it.
Unfortunately, it often seemed that the law law didn't agree with their style of living. They also stole a lot of shit, but like, they needed it so who's really in the wrong. According to the kingdom of boringness, they were all wanted criminals. Even Tommy! He was just a boy, the ripe old age of 17. Truly a travesty.
What wasn’t a travesty was the view today. Water on all sides, not a ship in sight, and the only sound was the crashing waves. Tommy could almost fall asleep laying on the deck listening to it.
“Tommy!”
Maybe not.
“You fucker! Get over here right now.”
Ah, his bitchass brother Wilbur was calling. It sounded like he was in the captains quarters, so Tommy sat up and headed in that direction.
“NOW!”
“I’m fucking coming!” Slowly, but he wasn’t lying.
The deck was slippery, Techno must’ve just mopped. Shiny. He kicked the door open, the handles broke long ago.
Wilbur stood behind a map-covered desk holding one in particular. His newest work, only half complete, but it you asked Tommy it was perfect. Also Will was foaming-at-the-mouth pissed.
“You drew a fucking dick on my brand new map.” Tommy did in fact do that.
“WHAT!”
A new voice entered the chat. Their aging father called out from somewhere. “You did what?” Probably the crows nest, bird bitch.
“To be fair, it was really funny at the time-“
“I’m gonna have to redraw this! There’s no dick in the isles of Manburg. It’s gonna take hours!”
Phil appeared behind Tommy, scaring the fuck out of him. He wasn’t there the whole time, was he?
“Tommy, apologize.”
Will looked flabbergasted, appalled, shocked to his very core. “Apologize? That’s all? He deserves to burn for this shit!” Wilbur whined. “No one’s gonna wanna buy my maps now!”
“No one wanted to buy maps from a wanted criminal anyway.” Techno piped in from a lovely looking chair in the corner. Knowing the bitch he was probably there the whole time.
“And no one asked you Techno. Personally Tommy, I wouldn’t mind using you as a table when I redraw this.”
“Okay that is ridicu-“
Phil laughed at the prospect. “Actually, I’m in. That sounds funny. Tommy, you do that.”
“This is cruel and unusual punishm-“
“I gotta get back to steering this ship. All your yapping drew me down here.”
Phil left, closing the door behind him like the lovely gentleman he was. Wait, no, he’s a bitch now because Tommy has to be a fucking table for like, 6 hours.
As he pondered what that meant. Techno helpfully informed the pair that he would return when they made landfall, then left without a word.
In all this shit, Tommy had forgotten they were going on a treasure hunt today. He glanced back at Will, a quill poised evilly in his hand. The other held a fresh sheet of paper. This was gonna be a long day.
——————————————
“Aaaaaaaaand, done!” Wilbur declared, finally lifting his new, penis free, map off Tommy’s back. His back fucking hurt, and his hands, and his knees. But it only took a few hours, much less than they both exaggerated.
And Wilbur’s incessant ramblings while sketching did indeed keep him company. But they were done now, so he collapsed on the floor to rest his bones for a bit. If anyone asked, he learned his lesson.
“Land ho!” Phil’s voice rang out from the top deck. Just when he got comfortable.
Tommy rose from the wooden floor, following Will out the door. Techno dropped down from wherever the fuck that man was beside him.
“How was the tabling?”
“0/10. Would not recommend.”
The now trio ascended the stairs to where Phil stood proudly by the helm, staring out. Tommy saw it now, a little speck of sand in the distance. The treasure hunt destination. Of awesomeness.
Tommy was a little sad he’d have to leave the ship. Being on land gave him reverse seasickness. Don’t look into it, it’s real. But that was nothing compared to filling his pockets with priceless gems and cool rocks.
“Cmon now kids. Sunlight is fading fast!”
Will sighed. “It can’t be past three. You really are getting old.”
“He just needs to be back in time for the early bird dinner.” Techno joked back, but Phil was already across the ship and pulling the plank out and down.
“Let’s go slowpokes.”
Phil began descending the plank and Will and Techno engaged themself in a sort of race to beat their old man. Tommy was content to just meander and mosey down the deck.
The rest of his family quickly reached the white sands of the beach, Tommy still at the top of the ramp. He kissed the ship goodbye before rushing down the plank to his waiting brothers and father.
The island was small, he could see the other shore through the trees, but it sure was pretty. Tall palms, rare flowers, and low hanging fruits made up most of the wildlife. Tommy could spot a few birds, but not much more. He bets the island is pretty long, though.
The sand was a weird texture against his feet. He was used to be being barefoot on the ship, god he missed her already. Overall, pretty nice.
“Alright children. We’ll be splitting into pairs to cover more ground. I’ll be with Techno-“
“Haha, yes!”
“-And we will be collecting supplies for the trip back to the mainland.”
“Awww.”
“My two troublemakers, I have stupidly put you in charge of searching for treasure.”
Tommy whooped with excitement, trying to high-five Wilbur and missing horribly.
The four said their goodbyes and parted ways, Tommy chanting to himself the whole time.
”We’re going treasure hunting. We’re going trea-“
“Will you silence yourself for the love of god?”
“No.” He blew a raspberry at Will for that final touch. This was gonna be fun.
——————————————
“We’ve been walking forever!”
“It’s been five minutes you insufferable child.”
“But we’ve totally passed that tree before.”
“Yeah, well that cave is brand new.”
“Cave?”
Tommy and Will locked eyes, both realizing at the same time. He grinned, fully mischievous. Wilbur nodded back. They both ran to the cave, both trying to be the first one in.
The sand and grass quickly switched to pebbles which, crazy enough, really hurt his feet. Will and his stupid shoes reached the mouth of the cave first, Tommy right behind him.
As soon as he entered the mouth of the cave, everything felt different. It was gorgeous. Will had stopped along with him, both staring at the hidden beauty. The cave made its way downward in a natural slope, so Tommy followed it.
There was something about the soothing touch of the smooth rocks as he ran his hand over them. Will smacked his hand off the wall.
“No touchy. You could send the whole place crashing down.”
Tommy muttered under his breath. “You wanted to touch em too.”
A left turn, then a right turn, then another left turn, and a long path going straight. His lack of shoes was making it quite difficult to keep up with Will. The cave was a fucking maze, they were totally gonna get lost in here.
Tommy could hear the sound of running water close by. Waterfalls meant good things, he thinks. His footsteps became quicker as he excitedly moved faster and faster to find the source. Even pushing past Will, who loving gave him the bird.
The cave opened up to a final room. It was a small underground waterfall, pouring into the waters of the lake below. There were other sections of the lake with much calmer waters, that look clean enough to bathe in. He definitely needed a bath.
He kicked a piece of dirt, and noticed a small, luminescent mushroom under his foot. He picked it up gently. This was cool as shit.
“Will look at this shit!” But his brother’s focus was on the water. The prick was probably thinking about ‘practical things’ like survival and escape the royal navy without dying from dehydration. How boring.
Wilbur turned to face Tommy, still proudly holding his mushroom, a conceded look on his face. “This cave looks untouched, I don’t think we’re gonna find treasure here.”
“You said that last time!” Tommy whined.
“And I was right last time, plus there were a fuckton of guards on the last island.”
Yeah, whatever. Tommy pocketed his little mushroom, ready to pout the whole way back up. They began their ascent back up when he heard a cracking noise. The pair paused, watching as the ground beneath them slowly split apart.
Wilbur ran up the slope toward the exit while Tommy ran down toward the lake. The stone path separating them split fully. The rock must’ve eroded all weak. Pussy rocks.
“Tommy! The fuck did you do?”
Oh he was not taking this shit. He spat back. “Why would you assume I did this shit? It didn’t do anything! This is totally your fault.”
The ceiling began it’s collapse, starting with the entrance. Rocks fell, effectively sealing off their only exit.
“Tommy!”
“Bitch?!”
Wilbur paused for a moment, and Tommy realized with him that he was stuck up there while Tommy was stuck down here. That sucked absolute ass.
But the cave was still caving in, and there weren’t many places to cower. Will seemed to have found his bearings in an inlet in the cave’s wall. Tommy picked a hiding spot underneath the path they had taken under here. Right beside the lake.
“Tommy. Little help here?” Wilbur shouted.
Tommy could hardly hear him over the rest of the walls and ceiling collapsing in on itself.
“What the hell do you want me to do!?”
The final rock settled in place, leaving a storm of dust in its wake. Tommy inhaled some, coughing it up back into the cloud.
Will coughed up some dust from his higher ledge. “I dunno.”
“We’re fucked down here, aren’t we?”
“I think so Tommy.”
They were totally fucked. Techno and Phil had no idea where they were, they were totally sealed deep underground in an unstable cave, and he was completely useless down here with Wilbur up there.
“Hey Will, at least the navy’s never gonna find our skeletons down here.” Tommy’s joke fell flat, Wilbur just coughed again.
This was decidedly not going to be fun.