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Eraser stirred awake, stretching and yawning. God his head hurt. He looked next to him, counting four people whom he didn't know were sleeping, plus around five or six more passed out on the floor. Shit. This isn't the hotel, isn't it?
Fuck. He did it again. Of fucking COURSE he did it again, he had to go out and get drunk again and end up at some random person's house.
He promised Pen he would stop.
Why is he so fucking stupid? Eraser got up, stepping around people, lighters, and liquor bottles. All while his head was throbbing. It felt like someone was inside of it, ripping apart his brain and hammering their fists against his skull. He deserved it, anyways. Eraser stumbled out the door onto the front porch, sitting down on one of the stair steps and dialing Pen. It was already noon, so he should be up by now.
Eraser could feel something wet on his face. It's not raining, though. Even if it's pretty cloudy.
Oh.
He's crying.
Eraser took deep breaths, in and out. In and out. But it wasn't working. The ringing coming from his phone didn't help much, either. God, Pen's gonna be so mad. No, not mad. He would be hurt. Eraser didn't want that, god, he hated that he made him feel that. Why is he such a bad friend? A bad person, even? He'll never change, he's incapable of change and always will be.
Pen picked up after what felt like an eternity. Eraser tried to ask him to pick him up, talk, anything. But all that came out were half-muttered words and sobs. He couldn't calm himself down. Why can't he FUCKING calm down for FUCKING once he is so fucking stupid he can't do ANYTHING right everyone's going to be so FUCKING disappointed-
"H- Hey, Eraser? Are you okay? Where are you? Are you hurt? Do you need help?" Pen asked on the other side of the phone. Shuffling could be heard, probably him gathering his stuff so he could drive to wherever Eraser needed him to. Did Pen drop everything just to help someone as helpless as himself?
Okay, Eraser, calm down. Get it out. Just talk.
"P-Pen. I'm s-so so-sorry." Eraser let some sobs slip out before he continued. "P-Please. P-Pick m-me up." Silence. Soon, a car door shut. "Okay, just text me the address. I'm not mad, I promise, I just need to get you to safety. Please don't think I'm mad. I love you, okay?"
"...I-I love y-you too."
Hang up.
Eraser clenched his sides after texting his location. Shit, he's shirtless. Just realized that, too.
He's so broken.
More tears streamed down his face as he squeezed himself harder and harder. It hurt, but he deserved it. Eraser was trying his best not to wail, to not disturb anyone. It was so hard.
That's when he heard a car pull up, and a car door open and close. Pen quickly ran to his side, taking both his hands off of himself. Blood was on his fingernails. Eraser had his hand down, quietly sobbing. He tried to stop, but couldn't.
"Eraser, Eraser. Look at me, honey. Please." Eraser obeyed, moving his head up and staring at Pen, eyes wet and cheeks stained. Pen embraced him for a moment before separating and pulling him up, guiding his boyfriend to the car. They both got in, with Pen in the driver's seat and Eraser sitting next to him in the passenger's.
Eraser looked down, twiddling his thumbs anxiously as guilt filled his entire being. He promised Pen to stop drinking. He was doing so well, too.
"I'm sor-" "No, please. Eraser. You don't need to be sorry," Pen spoke as they drove back home. "I love you, okay?" Eraser choked on another sob. He tried to hold it in. His nose stung as he pulled his arm up to his face, trying to hide behind it. "I-I love you too."
Soon, they arrived back at the hotel that Two built for them, getting out and walking inside. Golfball, who was sipping on some coffee, stared at the both of them, a confused look plastered onto her face. "What's up with hi-" "What's up with your fucking face?" Pen barked back at her, pulling Eraser upstairs to his room without another word. He gently closed the door behind him, sighing and plopping down onto his bed, motioning Eraser to do the same. Eraser nodded, laying down next to his boyfriend.
"...I fucked up."
"I know."
Eraser didn't know what to say anymore. He wanted to apologize, to beg for forgiveness, but Pen already forgave him, didn't he? Why was he so good to him?
"..."
Pen raised his hand to Eraser's face, caressing his face and playing with his hair. "No one's perfect. Not even you. It's okay to fuck up sometimes. I'm not mad at you, and I never was. I'm just glad you're safe. I love you."
That's when Eraser broke down. He wailed into Pen's chest as Pen comforted him, rubbing his back and holding him tight. He didn't deserve this. Pen didn't deserve this. He didn't deserve to have Eraser as his boyfriend, he was probably emotionally exhausted by him. He hated this. He hated this constant weight on his shoulders, he hated how no matter what, doubts always lingered in his head. He hated how his arms were covered in scars.
He hated being such a burden.
But he felt safe in Pen's arms. He felt comforted and loved. That helped Eraser calm himself down to the point where he could speak coherently. There were a few minutes of silence, where they both embraced each other wordlessly.
"I-I think I need help. Like, major help." Eraser broke the quiet, sinking deeper into Pen's chest. "Yeah, you do," Pen agreed, running his hands through Eraser's soft, pink hair. "And I'll be there. Every step of the way."
Eraser looked up at his lover. "Thanks. I love you." He said as he rested his head again, dozing off. Pen tiredly smiled.
"I love you too, Eraser."