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Kim Dokja never thought of doing this. He never thought he would even have the courage to start, and even less, continue.
It all began one day after reading a couple of novels involving main characters who happened to be streamers and his curiosity took over. Checking for a streaming site, he found Star Stream and spent the next few days browsing the seemingly infinite videos on the platform. As usual, he discovered the most obscure streamers. Some were weird and he never tried to watch them again, while some others were actually interesting and Kim Dokja wondered why they didn't get more popular, just like his beloved novels…
This is how he found out about streaming a novel. To put it simply, a person would choose a novel or book to read aloud. That was it, that was the stream.
At first, Kim Dokja found one or two interesting novels to read thanks to the streamers, but nothing else satisfied him. Should he do it instead and read his favorite ones? They were still being published but it would be nice to re-read them (again) and if he got at least one more reader on board, it would probably make the authors happy, right? Who knows, maybe that new reader would have enough money to go over paidwalls!
With that said, he didn't really do anything for months.
Usually, the idea would have faded away from his mind but for some reason, Kim Dokja thought about streaming every now and then. It wasn't until he had a very harsh day at work where he thought Whatever let's get over it, just once won't hurt.
That was Kim Dokja's first night stream.
Making an account and setting up was easy, he would use his phone to record his voice and read at the same time, while the camera was facing his small table. There was no way he would show his face online, obviously.
As nervous as he was, he went for his comfort novel, Three Ways to Survive the Apocalypse, or TWSA for short. If he was doing this, he would have Yoo Joonghyuk accompany him just like many other times he was facing a new challenge. This way they were never truly alone.
As expected, his stream had zero views. What's more, he had to stop in the middle of the first chapter as his throat was dry and sore. He never spoke this much at once. Kim Dokja surprised himself by thinking Next time I'll get some water ready beforehand.
Next time, huh...
Not long after the first night, Kim Dokja had a bottle of water next to him and was ready to read the second half of the first chapter. He continued streaming for himself more than anything else, finding it to be relaxing after a stressful day at work. He didn't have followers (or viewers, for the matter) and he streamed whenever he felt like it. But before he knew it, he started receiving viewers.
At the beginning it was random people who were curious enough to enter the stream, they would get bored and leave. It happened quite a few times, with some mean comments to boot, like [boering] or [y u bother]. Grammar in all its most splendorous glory.
What surprised Kim Dokja was that slowly but steadily, he got people to actually follow him. It started with one person. Kim Dokja read the message after the stream as he couldn't read messages while reading the novel. This person commented on how they found Kim Dokja's voice soothing (thanks?) and because the novel was boring (hey, rude), it was perfect for sleeping. Kim Dokja was unsure if to be glad or bothered by the comment but replied nonetheless.
[Thanks and sorry I couldn't read your message during the stream. Also, the novel is good, give it a chance].
Yoo Joonghyuk, the famous proplayer, was desperate. Yoo Mia–his sister–was having a hard time sleeping, which made her more grumpy, tired, and unable to focus. Logically, her grades dropped and her behavior was being called out by teachers more often. Of course, this also influenced Yoo Joonghyuk by not letting him sleep properly either, having to worry about his sister, and also his own job. It was getting out of hand.
Both siblings tried everything they could think of, from meditation to physical exercise and even visiting the doctor but none of it worked.
One of Yoo Joonghyuk's teammates told him to try listening to streams dedicated to helping people sleep (while also still following their sleeping routine). Apparently, it was starting to become popular, this so called ASMR or whatever. Yoo Joonghyuk was not too sure and didn't care enough to understand, he just wanted to sleep. Still, he already tried so many things, one more wouldn't hurt. Yoo Mia would also try one.
It took Yoo Mia several weeks to find a stream that helped her sleep. Most of them were relaxing but didn't help her until she found one that talked about animals and insects. She was not particularly interested but it was run by two kids who sounded like they were her age and even if their banter was fun, she got so comfortable that she couldn't help but sleep when she was tired. Her brother, on the other hand, didn't find anything, so Yoo Mia took it upon herself to help her precious brother. They were pretty similar in that sense after all.
While her brother struggled—lying that he was fine—Yoo Mia searched for the most obscure streamers, those who were known to be boring. On her long quest, she found many but none worked and her brother told her to stop (what if she found weird things online?). She was stubborn, just like her brother, and wouldn't stop until he got to sleep since it was her fault to begin with.
When she was starting to lose hope, she found him. Hidden away in a poorly known community under the Star Stream. Yoo Mia found her brother's ASMR streamer.
All the comments were about this "Guwon" person, who apparently helped his ten-ish followers sleep soundly each time. The man would just shoot his table, sometimes his hands holding a black phone—a bit of his torso as the background—and reading the most boring stories ever known to men. But those were not the (main) reasons why he was so good, it was because of his soft, smooth and soothing voice, plus the way he told the stories. Even if they were boring, you couldn't stop listening and eventually wake up the next morning with no recollection of when it happened.
Yoo Joonghyuk tried watching this Guwon guy and soon found that all the comments were correct. This person's taste in novels was awful, but he couldn't close the stream. Next thing he knew, it was morning and he was the most well rested he felt in a long time. After two more nights following this pattern, Yoo Joonghyuk became Guwon's follower, and was even trying to follow the damn TWSA story for the days Guwon wasn't streaming (it was weird to have the main character's name). It was hard because he fell asleep halfway through the video but also because Guwon really seemed to enjoy the story, streaming a new chapter every week, sometimes even twice.
Guwon would sometimes read a follower's request, those were the most interesting stories, even if Guwon himself would complain in the comments afterwards, rambling about TWSA's greatness and how everyone should appreciate it more. Nobody did.
Other times, the most rare of them all, would be when Guwon complained about what happened at his job that day. It was usually one or two comments before he went right into the story, or replied to old messages as he (still) didn't read live ones. These times, Yoo Joonghyuk—and the other followers—felt that they could know a bit more about their eccentric salvation. He felt closer somehow.
Three months into watching Guwon's videos every single day, Yoo Joonghyuk felt like he knew the guy personally. Heck, he even caught up with TWSA until the last chapter Guwon posted! That was something! Still, all that watching did not prepare him and the other followers for what they saw that night.
Kim Dokja stumbled back to his apartment after a company's party, drunker than what he had expected to be. He drunk who knows how many bottles of soju as his boss kept pestering him to drink more. It was either him or some of the ladies who looked really uncomfortable, so Kim Dokja took it upon himself to get it over with.
Exhausted and more than a little annoyed, he drunkenly set up his streaming equipment. It was only his new phone for the novel and his older phone as the camera. Kim Dokja didn't expect to gain anything from streaming but the new phone was a gift from a follower.
He got a comment once about how he saved the person's career as the person couldn't sleep no matter what they did. For saving this person, Guwon's follower asked for a way of gifting something to him. Kim Dokja took it as a joke and DM’d this person with his bank account. But the next day he got a message from the same person, telling him to get himself a good phone with the money.
Kim Dokja remembered what he was doing and finished setting up. Slouching on his chair because of his drunken state with his face still out of frame, he started the impromptu stream with slurred speech and long pauses.
"Evnin' everyone...! Mn... s'rry, I'ma little drunk... I r'lly dislike... c'mpany parties... They... They like to... drink...lots..." Kim Dokja struggled to get his ideas out there but his mind was muddled and his mouth didn't cooperate, his movements slow.
"M' boss... Told me to... S'ng... Many times .. so...! I... I kinda... Pr'cticed y'know... But all th'ir songs 're bor'ng..." Kim Dokja paused, seemingly to doze off. Both his posture and voice hinted this, but the viewers couldn't see his face so they couldn't be sure.
Yoo Joonghyuk couldn't believe what he was seeing in the unexpected stream and apparently the others couldn't either. The comments were going insane and there were only four people online besides Yoo Joonghyuk: ABFD, AngelJudge, Goku, and LostCartrige. They never saw Guwon this drunk before. All the comments were a mix of making fun of him (ABFD and sometimes Goku), worrying (mainly AngelJudge and LostCartrige, occasionally also Goku) and gushing about how cute Guwon was (only AngelJudge commented this and no force on Earth would make Yoo Joonghyuk admit to agree).
"...So! I'ma... Try s'm'thing new...I pr'cticed s' I can sing...! Mn... N'ver sang n'front of anyone...s'ok! I pr'cticed!" Guwon's voice was soft even when he was excited by the alcohol.
Yoo Joonghyuk couldn't help but snort to suppress a laugh. Guwon sounded like a kid... And how eager was he really to sing if he insisted this much? Yoo Joonghyuk didn't care if the guy was out of tune, it'd probably be fun to watch.
Guwon took his phone and typed for a long time. He seemed to be searching for a song. His drunken mind couldn't process typing, searching and talking at the same time. Thankfully, soon there was a melody, it was slow but a bit heavy. It matched Guwon's taste in literature.
"I...l'ke this s'ng...'cuz tells...good st'ry..." Babbled Guwon during the intro of the song, followed by his soft singing voice.
In Yoo Joonghyuk's opinion, It was not as melodious as it could (probably) be thanks to the influence of alcohol, but it was not that bad for a drunk guy. ABFD seemed to think very differently though as he kept laughing in chat with Goku, while the other two gave different types of support.
Yoo Joonghyuk focused on the lyrics as Guwon said he liked the story of the song. It was no surprise when he understood the overall story, it really matched Guwon's taste. The song was about a warrior who was betrayed and probably killed, asking for help from his fellow warriors to pursue vengeance, while explaining how the kingdom flourished and perished along with its citizens by the hands of the traitors.
Sooner than later the song ended and Guwon giggled. Giggled. Asking how they liked the song, babbling more about the story and how it reminded him of a novel. Yoo Joonghyuk was not really listening, his mind kept replaying the damn giggling. It was soft and airy, not at all grating on his nerves like the giggles he heard at high school or sometimes at work. It was of course rougher than a woman's, but damn he needed to hear that again.
Yoo Joonghyuk was so distracted that he didn't notice Guwon playing the next song. In the beginning, the guitar chords were slow and made you want to close your eyes... Until he heard the lyrics.
What was Yoo Joonghyuk thinking, this is Guwon, there was no way this song would be cute or soft, that's the kind of person this man is.
The intro was about a land of silence. A place where it shouldn't be a surprise to encounter death. While thinking about that, as soon as Guwon finished singing, the beat suddenly turned heavier with electric guitars, changing the song completely to a heavy rock song that didn't go well with Guwon's softer image, but it didn't sound bad either.
ABFD was having a field day, he was the only one happily surprised while the rest of them were in shock. When the second verse ended, Guwon let out a high pitched death growl without any kind of warning. He literally just screamed like a professional heavy metal singer, while drunk. Then continued singing as if it wasn't the most unexpected thing to do.
Yoo Joonghyuk stopped his though process for the rest of the stream as Guwon continued singing heavier and heavier metal songs, sounding less drunk, and if Yoo Joonghyuk was honest, it was the first time he actually enjoyed this genre of music. He had an inkling that it was only because it was Guwon singing, but he wouldn't tell a soul about it.
The songs (after the initial surprise and keyboard spam from everyone else in the comments) were following Guwon's tastes, they all told epic tales filled with suffering and fantasy.
There was one that was a bit vague, but it was still about a city that was being attacked and the people were defending themselves.
Another—that Guwon said was his favorite because it reminded him of Yoo Joonghyuk from TWSA—was about an arduous journey, where the protagonist reincarnated several times and saw friends die over and over, but even if it hurt and the protagonist was tired, they would continue to reach the end and make their dream come true.
The next was softer and the intro was really long, so much so that Guwon drank water and even went on a bit about how this reminded him of how he wanted to be able to say something like this "back then". Guwon sounded so emotional and really into the song but in a different way as one would think. He didn't move as much as he did before and his hands even stopped tapping the rhythm. It was as if he was reminiscing something.
Yoo Joonghyuk wanted to see Guwon's expression.
The last song came automatically and everyone could see that Guwon was a bit out of it. Even if he still sang and sounded tired, maybe because of the alcohol or maybe because of a long day, he sighed and let the strong beat of the drums and guitar continue. None of the viewers had any idea what Guwon was thinking about but as the song progressed, everyone understood. The lyrics were pretty depressing. It was about being lied to, losing one self and the place you belong to because of someone else, and overall despair. It was the essence of depression.
AngelJudge and LostCartrige spammed the comments with questions along the lines of [Guwon are you ok?], and [Do you need anything?], while ABFD asked [Do you feel this too?], [Did I find a kindred spirit to share the pain and agony that is solitude?], and [Darkness is a good friend]. Yoo Joonghyuk stopped paying attention to ABFD's spam, it was insane.
What he did wonder though, was if Guwon was really okay, did he really feel that or was it just because it sounded depressing? He couldn't get any answers as Guwon said he was tired and hastily finished the stream. The party of viewers were left confused and worried about their streamer that night.
Kim Dokja woke up on his table. His whole body hurt and he didn't feel so well. He definitely had a hangover on top of bodily pain, great.
With a sigh, he tried getting up to get changed and go to the convenience store for pain and hangover medicine. But his plan failed when he noticed the camera.
Did he stream last night? No... There's no way right? Right! He was just tired!
...
He lunged at his phone and checked his profile. There it was, he had a two hours stream last night after his company's party, so he was most definitely drunk during the whole video. Fucking amazing.
Opening the video and skipping some parts, fragments of last night resurfaced. He sang. He sang his metal songs. He did SEVERAL death growls. That's it, he will never return to the website after deleting this mistake.
Or so he wanted to do. By accident, he saw the messages his followers left him. All of them were different degrees of positive and supporting messages as well as questions about his wellbeing.
...
What?
...
No.
This was a mistake. It was not supposed to happen and most definitely, nobody should have heard him sing. Even his company, that pushed him to sing, in the end never let him do it.
There was a reason for that! He was not good! And even if he were, it was EMBARRASSING. Not to mention... Why were they asking about his wellbeing? Did he do something stupid? Of course he did, he was drunk!
He really didn't want to watch the two hour disaster to discover what really happened, he didn't have the energy. A non-working day ruined just like that. Fucking spectacular.