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Pina was, in Riz's opinion, a very kind and considerate animal.
He wasn't the nicest guy out there— in fact, more often than not he was everything but nice. However, if there was something Riz had learned after trying to be a good guy his whole life, it was that being nice was an overrated expectation. That sheep, while harsh and blunt —and yes, sometimes plain rude—, was impressively perceptive and helpful when he wanted to be. Despite everything they went through, Pina was still kind enough to forgive him and befriend him. He even brought honey for him to subdue the pain caused by his pills, and made sure to keep him company during his incarceration for the next few years.
And then, once he was released from prison, he offered him a place to stay, too— a small but cozy apartment they could share, so that he wouldn't have to deal with his parents' bad attitude or an expensive rent all by himself. It was certainly a very kind offer, another proof of Pina's considerate side.
So soon enough, they were unpacking his things in that small place of theirs. He hadn't brought too many possessions to begin with, but Pina, showing that kind side of his once again, insisted on helping him.
"Oh, this looks comfy." He had said, raising one of Riz's old pullovers to examine it closer, and, seeming satisfied with its appearance, he threw it over his head to put it on.
Riz had just stared at him as he did so, mostly because it was a very… interesting sight: a ram trying to put on something with those big horns in the way was a lot more fun than he ever thought it would be. He didn't actually mean to keep his gaze on Pina, but as soon as the sheep was done, he turned to look back at him, smiling smugly.
"You don't mind, do you?" He had asked, although it sounded more like a statement.
"No, it's fine." And it was true, he didn't mind at all. After all Pina had done for him, letting him wear his clothes was probably the least he could do. Besides… "You look cute with that."
And that was true as well, because even if Pina wasn't a very small animal, that pullover was big enough to hang on him like some kind of dress, and the collar was wide enough to fall a bit from his shoulder, giving the ram a disheveled but adorable appearance. Nevertheless, his compliment had no effect on the sheep, who just smirked and said, "I am always cute."
The bear scoffed at the vain statement; but, again, even that was true as well.
Pina quickly made a habit of wearing his sweaters, pullovers, and sweatshirts whenever he pleased. Riz truly didn't have a problem with that, but he didn't quite understand the point of it, either.
In fact, it seemed quite ridiculous. Most of them were way too big for Pina, and the sheep had to roll the sleeves over and over again when he worked on his laptop, only for them to fall back again and cover most of his hands every few minutes. He also had to take pauses when he walked around, as the garments fell down his shoulder every few steps. Seriously, how could that be comfortable to wear?
There was also the fact that Pina tended to take the ones he had just used, rather than just taking one from the closet.
"Let me at least wash that first." Riz told him one day, just after Pina had grabbed the hoodie he had just discarded in a chair. "You can take a clean one."
However, the sheep just shook his head and made a dismissive gesture at his suggestion. "It's fine. As long as it isn't sweaty, I don't mind."
And, well, alright. Riz had opened his mouth to ask if he was sure about that, but no sound came out of it. Instead, he just blushed slightly, a bit embarrassed for feeling some kind of warm satisfaction in his chest at the sight of his friend happily wearing his stuff.
Still, no matter how happy it made him, he couldn't ignore how strange the sheep's actions were. Why the hell would Pina like to use his clothes so damn much? Whether it was around the apartment, or just wearing them as pajamas, he spent most of his time in the bear's clothes, no matter how troublesome it seemed to do so.
In the end, though, Riz decided to let it pass. If he gave it too much thought he would start getting his hopes up. His crush on the ram was already bad enough, and the last thing he wanted was to start deluding himself as he did with Tem. He'd just ignore it and don't think about it.
Or well, that had been the plan. Unfortunately, Pina was not very interested in letting him do as he pleased.
On one of those days when he felt particularly sad for no apparent reason, and the world felt too heavy for him to stand, he sat on the couch and rested his head on the back, closing his eyes and trying to think of something good that had happened recently (a suggestion made by his therapist, although its effectiveness was still to be proven). It didn't actually bring any solace, but it somehow did increase his exhaustion. He was already falling asleep when he felt something curling to his side.
Opening his eyes, he looked down at the sheep hugging his arm, wearing the sweater he had taken off just half an hour before. Pina looked up at him, too; his big eyes giving him a look of innocence that effectively distracted Riz from the sudden closeness.
"... You're comfortable." The ram explained a few seconds later —although Riz would have sworn that they had been staring at each other's eyes for longer than that— "You don't mind, do you?"
The bear shook his head, only because his mouth felt suddenly too dry to respond. This time, however, his answer was a big lie. Of course he minded! This closeness felt… like too much, right?
But Pina had already taken his answer as a cue to cuddle closer, and was soon pressed tightly against him. Riz stayed frozen for a while, not sure what he was supposed to do with his hands. Pina had rested against him in a similar fashion when he was still in juvenile and prison, but he hadn't felt so nervous back then. After all, he was cuffed, so there was no movement expected from him. But now? Was he supposed to just stay like that?
Fortunately, Pina eventually fell asleep, letting Riz breathe normally again. And as he looked down at his friend one more time, he realized that, despite his nervousness, he somehow felt better than he had before Pina appeared at his side.
For better or for worse, Pina made a habit of that, too. He'd suddenly appear and cuddle with Riz while the bear tried his best to stay motionless. The first few times he was tense, but once he got used he just did his best to be a comfortable pillow for his friend.
Now, if he were to be completely honest, Riz would have to admit that despite the awkwardness, Pina's cuddling did make him feel more at ease. Especially because, somehow, the sheep always happened to hug him when he was feeling sad, stressed, or both. It shouldn't have been a surprise, considering that the ram always had an impressive luck to appear at the worst times, but it was still weird, right?
Nevertheless, Riz decided that the best thing to do was to not think too much about it. It was the cold season after all, and if Pina wanted to warm himself a little by wearing his clothes or hugging him close, well… he could be okay with that. Again, after all the kindness the sheep had shown him over the years, those were the minimum things Riz could do.
Those thoughts worked to convince himself for the next few months. However, things got weird as summer got closer. Pina didn't stop wearing his clothes despite the warm temperatures— in fact, he started using only his stuff and underwear, which was… hard to ignore. Especially because the damn sheep kept cuddling up to his side every chance he got.
Fortunately, if there was something Riz considered himself good at it was ignoring his own feelings. He'd just have to pretend to be unaffected as he had done 'til that moment, hoping the stress wouldn't kill him any time soon.
That is until one day, he saw the weirdest thing happening right in front of his eyes.
It had been a hard day— not because of any particular reason, it was simply… draining, perhaps. One of those days that are bad before it even starts. By the time he got home, Riz was already exhausted, and he went straight to the couch to sulk in silence. Pina arrived a few minutes later, and was already musing about his day before he had even entered the room. The bear opened his eyes, though he didn't make any attempt to move or even look at the ram.
Which was probably a big mistake, because the sheep stopped talking halfway through his sentence, and that finally made Riz turn his face at him.
"What's wrong?"
"Nothing." Was his automatic response. It was said too quickly, maybe, and he tried to conceal any emotion from his face to avoid further questions.
It didn't work, though, if Pina's expression was anything to go by. He had clearly sensed something was wrong. Riz was already thinking of an excuse, but the ram just sighed.
"Alright, don't tell me."
He turned around and started walking away, and for a moment Riz thought he would just leave him be to do other things —which was good. The ursine was probably not a good company in that mood.
However, Pina just went straight for one of his hoodies resting on the couch, put it on, walked back to him, and pressed Riz's head against his wooly chest.
What. The. Fuck.
"... It's hot." Was the first thing that came out of his mouth, because… well, it was hot, too much for wearing an oversized hoodie and hugging a fuzzy bear like him.
"Yeah, I know."
But instead of moving away —which was the logical thing to do, right?— Pina started running his small hands through the back of his ears, in what appeared to be a soothing gesture.
Alright, this was already too weird to ignore.
"Pina-kun." He started, trying to avoid getting Pina's fur in his snout. "What are you doing?"
"Hm?" The ram made a sound of confusion. Confusion! As if he had something to be confused about! "Well, I'm comforting you, obviously."
"... Huh?"
He finally got away from the herbivore, looking at him as if he had gone nuts. Nothing about this was obvious; he hadn't spent the last few months confused as hell for Pina to act as if any of this were obvious.
He'd have said something more to express his frustration, but Pina's face kept him from doing so. He looked genuinely hurt, although he didn't let it show for long. "Is it not working? Ah, well, I thought—"
"That's not—" He took a deep breath, trying not to sound too exasperated. "I mean, why did you put on my hoodie and then come and hug me as if I am… a child?"
It took Pina a while to respond, and to make things worse, he wore the most deadpan face possible while thinking about his response. This was probably the weirdest kind of torture Riz had ever experienced.
"Well, you know," The ram stated, although his voice sounded kind of unsure. "They say that when animals of the same species touch each other, their hearts become more at ease."
He took a pause after that to take a deep breath, and then continued with a subtle blush that would have certainly go unnoticed if his fur weren't pure white: "I'm not a bear, but I thought that if I wore your used clothes, it would feel somewhat similar?"
The last part sounded more like a question than a statement, as if he were unsure if that was what he had truly assumed. Before Riz could comment on it, though, the sheep said something that made his heart sink. "I… thought it had worked before?"
And as if he had been hit by a wave of realization, the ursine finally connected the dots that had been so obviously placed before him, but had been unable to see the whole picture without this essential piece of information. Not one time had it been a coincidence, Pina had been using his stuff and cuddling closer on purpose every time he had sensed he was troubled. Why? Because he thought that it would be the closest thing to the solace that could only be given by a bear hug.
"Pffftttt—" He snorted, taking one hand to his forehead as he threw his head back to release a most natural laugh. "You— haha! You gotta be kidding me! How stupid are you?"
Soon enough, Pina took half a step back, looking both embarrassed as well as insulted. "Excuse me? I was trying to be nice, asshole!"
Before he could move away again, Riz grabbed him by the arm to pull him close —and, how weird, hadn't he done that before? Last time, however, it had been done in fear, a desperate attempt to be reassured of someone else's love.
But this time, it was his turn to reassure this herbivore that he was loved back. "Pina-kun, wait, hold on. Let me explain, it's just—" He chuckled again, shaking his head at the ridiculousness of the situation. "I'm sorry, it's just that— you don't need to wear my clothes to make me feel better, idiot."
The ram flushed bright red this time, and he opened his mouth to retort something, but Riz's next words took every coherent thought away from his mind. "You make me feel better already just by being you. I love you for everything that you are, and I don't need you to be anything more than that."
Because even if Pina wasn't the nicest animal out there, even if he was small and fragile unlike a brown bear, and even if he was imperfect in many, many ways… he was still Riz's best friend, the kindest sheep for an imperfect carnivore like himself. And at the end of the day, even if they were different in any possible way, they shared the imperfect state that is part of being alive. And isn't that the greatest thing of all? To be accepted despite all your mistakes, to be loved despite your flaws, isn't that the hardest, yet the most beautiful part of being loved?
Pina had gone mute, unable to process the genuineness of his surprisingly casual confession. Riz didn't let that bother him, though, as his redness made it clear that the sheep felt just the same way.
Chucking again, he brought Pina close again, nuzzling his neck and running his nose through the soft, white fur in there. "Your wool is all my heart needs to feel as if it is floating through the sky."
"... That's… overly sweet, even for you." The sheep muttered, although he sounded surprisingly composed despite his confused state.
They stayed like that for a while. Eventually, Pina put his arms around Riz's head again and hugged him back. Pressed against his chest, the bear could feel the ram's accelerated heartbeat, resonating like a drum that announces the presence of a band. Perhaps it wasn't exactly the relaxation that could be brought when touching another bear like he was, but it brought another kind of peace— that which you feel when you are happy to be alive, that one that comes when you decide to enjoy life.
"... I love you." Pina whispered some time later. His voice was barely audible, as if he had been afraid of admitting so out loud.
Nevertheless, those quiet words had been enough to bring the greatest peace to Riz's heart.
Later, after having fully expressed the depth of their love, Pina took Riz's shirt to cover himself. He was about to get up from the bed when two bear hands appeared at his waist, keeping him in place.
"You plan to leave with my shirt?" His lover asked, leaving a kiss on his naked shoulder, as the garment was so big that it slipped down his arm.
The ram laughed before petting the ursine's fuzzy face. "I'm just going to get some water; as you've left me thirsty and exhausted. And I'm not the kind of guy who likes to tease others by walking around showing his body in all its glory."
Riz finally let him go, chucking at Pina's choice of words. "You sound almost sincere, but humbleness has never been your forte."
"Why, you think I'm lying?" The ram asked, turning his head to speak eye to eye with the other. "I sincerely thought I wouldn't need to resort to those kinds of dirty tricks to pique your interest."
"You don't, indeed." He smiled, raising one hand to cup the sheep's face. "You have already captured my interest, as well as my heart. And you've done both so effortlessly, that I'm afraid any conscious attempt of seduction you may try against me will leave me eternally starved for you."
Pina smirked. "I shall try, then, if that will keep you forever by my side."
Having said so, the herbivore moved closer to hug him tight, both sincerely wishing they could stay forever like that.
"... There's something I must confess." The ram said after a while, though his voice sounded muffled from being pressed against the ursine's chest. "I didn't just wear your clothes because I wanted you to feel better. Sometimes, I just wanted to feel you closer. I guess it feels like being surrounded by your strength and warmth."
"Hm… is unfair, then, that you can have a part of me whenever you please, even if I'm not there to give it myself."
Honestly, Riz didn't truly expect an answer to that, but his statement actually made Pina think. "Huh… say, it's getting pretty hot lately, isn't it?"
"Uh-huh."
The sheep pushed him back slightly, and Riz reluctantly dissolved their embrace. Before he could ask anything, though, Pina beat him to it. "How would you feel about me getting a fur cut?"
"... What."
Pina pointed at the wool around his neck. "You once told me you liked it long, so I've kept it like that since then. However, it gets uncomfortable during warm seasons like this. So I'm asking, how would you feel about me getting it cut, and using it to knit a scarf for you to wear when we are apart?"
And this time, it was Riz’s turn to turn bright red as he tried to go through every word Pina had said over his head. To know that he had kept his fur long just for him, and to know that he would be willing to cut it and make a scarf out of it, for him to wear…
“Would you really do that? I mean, would you be okay with it?”
"Of course." The ram said with a big smile. "Us sheep don't give everyone our fur, you know? But for you… Nothing would make me happier than knowing that, even if I'm not a bear, I can be of help to you."
“Stupid sheep.” The ursine chuckled, because seriously, where did he even get the idea that Riz ever wanted a bear, or anyone else for that matter?
“All of you is all I need to be happy, from the bottom of my heart.”