Work Text:
“So, when are you going to tell him.”
You look up from your book at the talking raven with a confused frown. “Tell who what, Matthew?”
Matthew scoffs, or at least as close as he can get to the sound and movement in a bird body, hopping a few spaces closer across the library table. “When are you going to tell You Know Who how you feel about him?”
You roll your eyes, carefully closing the book that you’d had open. “Matthew-”
“No, no, I’m tired of watching the two of you dance around whatever this is. You may not be able to see it, but Morpheus-”
“Morpheus sees me as at best a friend, and at worst a short-lived annoyance.” You give the raven a pointed look, ignoring how he puffs up and ruffles his feathers in annoyance at your response. “We’ve had this conversation before, Matthew, and my answer is always going to be the same.”
You get up from the library window seat you’d been perched on for the last few hours, gathering up the books scattered across the table. Lucienne might have let you have free-reign of the books in the library, but you were going to clean up after yourself.
“I don’t understand why you won’t just listen to me on this, I know the boss, I know what I’m talking about.”
Shaking your head you shoot the raven a small smile, turning towards the tall shelves. “Yes, Matthew, you know him. But you’re also sentimental, and I think your personal feelings are getting in the way here. You’re seeing things you want to see because you want your friends to be happy. And I appreciate that, I do, but it’s not real.”
You slot a book into an empty space on the shelf, Matthew hopping along behind you. “Morpheus lets me hang out here because I don’t cause trouble and he can learn more about humans without having to go out into the waking world. And because you and Lucienne like having me around.”
“Yea, but-”
“I’m human, Matthew, and not a particularly interesting human at that. I’ve got the lifespan of a fly compared to him, and I’m probably just as annoying as a fly sometimes.” You slotted books into their places as you walked, briefly wishing you’d grabbed one of the wheeled carts that were scattered around the library. At least then Matthew would have had somewhere to sit.
“I think-”
“You think things that aren’t true, Matthew. I’m lucky Dream sees me as something like a friend in the first place, considering how well that went over with Hob. I’m not going to ruin that by confessing stupid human emotions to him. I don’t want to lose the Dreaming and the friends I’ve made here.”
“You-”
“Matthew…” You let out a sigh, slotting the last book into place. “I appreciate it, I do, but-” As you speak you turn towards the talking bird, and suddenly understand why he kept trying to interrupt you.
Morpheus stands a few rows down with a shocked expression on his face, eyes wide and mouth slightly open like he’d intended to say something. You freeze, staring at him in horror as a creeping sense of dread settles over you. Below you Matthew nervously hops towards you, ducking his head. “I did try to tell you.”
The two of you stare at each other for a moment, a heavy silence settling over the library. Your thoughts are racing too fast for you to keep track of, but you finally settle on one;
You have to get out of here.
You take a step back just as he steps forward, and the movement sends a bolt of panic down your spine. The adrenaline combined with your sheer panic is enough to convince your body you need out of the ‘dream’ you’re in, and you’re suddenly pulled out of the Dreaming and into your body.
You sit bolt upright in bed, adrenaline still flowing through you. It takes a moment for you to process the change in scenery, but as soon as you do you’re frantically climbing out of bed. Morpheus knows where you live, you’d shown him your small apartment months ago, and it’s only a matter of time before he gets over his shock and turns up here.
The sound of sand swirling around your living room chases you out the door, shoes and phone in hand.
It takes you a while to decide what you’re doing. Once the panic wears off, all you're left with is dread and a general sense of trying your best not to cry. You probably look insane wandering around in your pajamas, but you can’t find it in yourself to care.
Eventually you end up in a park, settling on a bench tucked back into some trees. You hope the cover means Matthew can’t find you, giving you more time to think.
It seems you were wrong, because within only a few minutes you hear a caw from one of the high branches, and seconds later sand swirls across the grass a short distance away. As soon as Morpheus appears, brows furrowed as he watches you cautiously, Matthew jumps off the branch and glides away.
When you tense, ready to bolt again, Morpheus holds up a hand. “Please, don’t run again.”
It’s not the request that gets you to stay. It’s the ‘please’.
You watch him warily as he steps closer, every bone in your body screaming to run. You know this isn’t going to end well, you know his history and how he is with humans that try to get close, and you’re terrified to see how he reacts to this.
As he steps closer, however, you realize you don’t see the anger or indignation you were expecting. Instead, he looks…sad?
He stops a few feet away from you, just watching you for a moment like he’s afraid you’ll still bolt. When you don’t, he shuffles to the side, settling on the bench beside you.
There’s a moment of silence, and then, “Were you…afraid of me?”
It’s like something breaks in you. You let out a strangled laugh that you’re sure sounds half mad, dropping your head into your hands. “Yes, Morpheus. I was scared. I still am.” You look up, nearly faltering at the devastated look on his face. “I know how you reacted to Hob daring to think you were friends. How do you think I might assume you would react to a human daring to fall for Dream of the fucking Endless, despite the fact that I had no say in it. Is it really so astonishing I might be afraid of how you would react?"
You drop your head into your hands again, unable to handle the sight of him looking at you like that. Like you’ve just personally stabbed him in the heart and twisted the blade for good measure.
“I wouldn’t…I would never hurt you.” He’s almost whispering, and you can’t help but scoff.
“I didn’t think you would hurt me, but you didn’t hurt Hob, either. You just left him thinking he’d lost his only friend for over a hundred years.” It’s a low blow, you know that, especially considering such a large chunk of that wasn’t his fault. You sigh, pressing the heels of your hands into your eyes, colorful sparks filling the darkness of your vision. “I couldn’t risk losing...any of it. Matthew, Lucienne, the Dreaming…you. It wasn’t worth risking all of that, not even close to worth it.”
The backs of your eyes burn, and you let out a shaky laugh. “I’ve probably lost it all now anyway, now that you know.”
The silence stretches out between the two of you, taught and fragile, like even it is waiting for something to happen.
You nearly jump out of your skin when his fingers brush your skin, wrapping loosely around your wrist. He tugs, gently, pulling your hand away from your eye. You open the one free eye, watching in some combination of dread and amazement as his hand slides into yours, long fingers twining with yours.
“I am…sorry. For making you believe you needed to hide from me.” You tilt your head, free hand still holding your head up as you look at him with wide eyes. He’s watching you warily, a myriad of emotions written across his face, and it makes your heart ache just to look at him.
He swallows, hard, and breaks eye contact, dropping his gaze to your entangled fingers. “I am aware of just how badly I failed Hob, and I am…trying, to make amends for how I acted in the past. With him and with others. Allowing you to visit the library and more of the Dreaming than most humans have access to was part of that, at the start, but it…” He pauses, letting out a shaky breath, “It became more than that. I look forward to seeing you there, now, and I hadn’t realized how badly I have apparently failed to show that.”
Morpheus squeezes your hand, more of a comfort to himself than you, you suspect, and glances up at you. “I would not have been upset to learn of your feelings. I am not upset. Not when they are more than I ever dared to hope you would feel for me. Not when you are not alone in those feelings.”
You’ve been shocked before in your life. Surprise birthday parties, a better grade on your test than you expected, a puppy for Christmas. None of that, none of it, compares to the shock of learning that Morpheus, Dream of the Endless, reciprocates your feelings.
You stare at him for a moment, long enough to become aware of just how long you’re staring. You blink, and then blink a few more times, sitting up straight like it’ll help you think.
“I’m sorry…what?”
Morpheus blushes, blushes, pink dusting his cheeks and creeping down his neck. He ducks his head like he’s trying to hide, although he refuses to drop your hand. “I was unsure of how to tell you.”
You can’t help it. You start giggling, tilting your head back to look up at the canopy of trees above you. It feels like a weights been lifted off you. A big, stupid, ironic weight. This whole time you’d been worried for nothing.
You giggle for probably longer than you should, the fear and panic from the last couple hours draining away and leaving you feeling giddy. When you finally tilt your head Morpheus is watching you, a small smile on his face that you suddenly desperately want to kiss now that you know you can.
You still hesitate, grin faltering as your eyes flicker from his lips up to meet his gaze. He reaches over, free hand cupping your cheek. “I am sorry, for making you think you needed to be afraid of me.”
Leaning forward you press your face against his shoulder, suddenly unable to handle the emotions shining in his eyes. “S’okay. It was mostly me assuming, anyway.”
You feel his lips press against your temple and tilt your head back, dizzy with how close his face is to yours. “You can make it up to me, though. If you’re really sorry.”
He grins, beautiful and devastating, and strokes a thumb over your cheek. “How would you like me to do that?”
It’s your turn to grin as your eyes flicker down to his lips and then back up to those star-bright eyes. “I’ll think of something, I’m sure.”