Work Text:
There are times when the sadness threatens to swallow him whole. The sadness, stemming from nowhere devours him, rendering him incapable of moving. There are times where he is the most carefree man in the world. The cheerfulness and joy, encapsulating him in a feeling of safety and happiness.
But happiness is only temporary.
Time after time again, dark waves wash over him, leaving him empty. Yet he pushes through. For my siblings, he thinks. For my family, and for the Tsaritsa. He wears a mask, a cheerful facade, and keeps on working.
The mask shatters once he steps into his living quarters and locks the door. He breaks. Curling into a ball onto the floor, silent sobs wracked his body. He allowed himself to wallow in his sadness, before pushing on and showering. Eating his dinner. Brushing his teeth. Going to bed. Only after he curled up under the sheets did he allow his body to relax and the emotions to pour out. To put it simply, he grieved. He grieved for a childhood, lost to the Abyss. He grieved for what could've been, a promising future, untainted by bloodshed.
The young man fell asleep with tears staining his pillowcase.