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This day was… something.
The night skies were darker than ever, the faint light of the moon, a comfort. Ezran was speaking to the queen, Zym, Bait and Stella with him, and Soren and Callum with the help of that Earthblood kid went to look around the area for signs of Claudia.
Rayla was sitting on a boulder far away from all of them, the sounds of crickets were her only company.
Good. She didn’t feel like having company now. Despite the dust in the air, every breath she took felt fresh. The new chilly air in her lungs felt like emerging from deep water. The clear sky, a contrast to the storm swirling inside her heart. So many thoughts swirled in her head, so many feelings. She couldn’t even put her finger on which ones. They all seemed to just merge and became one big unpleasant feeling.
Her hand drifted to the pouch attached to her thigh where her parents and Runaan were in those coins. Despite the so many thoughts in her head, she didn’t know what to think. She thought they were dead. She always had a flicker of doubt, but she didn’t want to hold onto it. Realizing and accepting that they were gone was one of the hardest things she had gone through and she didn’t want to go through it again, but now…
She didn’t know if to believe at first, but it was true. Seeing their faces on those coins… She couldn’t even begin to explain how it made her feel. Only her heart truly knows. A mix of longing, grief and fear, but also… relief… in a way. She just… didn’t know what to do now. Will she ever get to see or hear them again? Smell that sweet smell of them and feel their arms around her?
She blinked back tears. It wasn't the time for tears. They needed to figure out their next step. Stopping Aaravos was their first priority.
Her palm lingered on her pouch, still not quite ready to move it away. She looked up at the moon, hoping it will somehow connect her to them.
"Hey." A quiet voice came from behind her.
With a swift motion she turned to look at the source of it and let her hand fall from the pouch to the boulder beneath her. She didn’t even notice he was there. It wasn’t like her.
"Hey." She replied back.
"Can I…?" He gestured to the spot next to her. "I think I'm ready to talk now." His face and voice hesitant.
"Sure." She smiled softly at him. She was still stuck in her own thoughts, but he finally wanted to talk and she wasn't going to say no to that.
He sat next to her silently. After a few moment of nothing but the sound of the crickets, she elected to speak first. "You're not going to ask me to kill you again, are you?" She said with a playful tone. But he didn’t laugh nor giggled. He didn’t even smile. When she realized that, her own smile disappeared.
"No." he didn’t even look at her, he kept looking ahead, his eyes unfocused. For a person who wanted to talk, he didn’t speak much.
After a moment of nothing but silence, he spoke again. "Rayla, when you left… it hurt me so much." His head dropped and his fingers started to fumble with the little stones next to him.
Her brow furrowed. "I know. I'm sorry." She kept looking at him, even though he wasn’t looking at her.
"I don’t think you do. Rayla, you knew this would hurt me. You lied to me and just disappeared. It broke me, Rayla."
She could feel her tears starting to well up again, but held them inside. He was the one that was hurting. Crying won't do any good. She wasn't the one that was abandoned.
"That morning I woke up happy and was ready to hug you, but when I got up and found your letter on your pillow… I knew. I had hope it was just a birthday riddle or something, but when I read it, it only confirmed what I already knew."
"Callum…"
"For the first few weeks I didn’t get out of bed. I didn’t talk, I didn’t eat… You have no idea how painful it was." A tear fell on his knee.
"Callum… I'm so sorry." She couldn't hold it anymore and a tear slipped out down her cheek.
"When you came back… I didn’t know how to feel. And all that time when you tried to get things back to the way they were, that was even worse. It's like you didn’t even acknowledge how much you’ve hurt me."
"No, I didn’t mean to… I just…" She sighed. "You're right. I didn’t know how to act. I made an illusion for me that it was fine when it clearly wasn’t. But Callum, I truly am sorry. Leaving you was a mistake. I let grief, anger and fear take over me and I'm sorry for that. So so sorry." Her tears flowed freely now, as well as his.
"Why… Why did you come back after all that time?"
"I… it's been too long. All that time, you were always in my head and in my heart. I was about to give up so many times, but the thought of protecting you kept me going, until I realized it wasn’t worth it and I finally gave up. All that time I was so lonely and all I wanted to do was just see you again. I was so scared, but decided to do it anyway. I missed you and Ez so much."
"You… do you still love me?"
"I never stopped. Do… do you?"
He took a deep breath. "I think I still love the past you, but you've changed, I've changed, but the past you is still a part of you. I think I just need time to get to know the new parts of you, and... Love them too."
"So, you... what do you... what now?"
"I think we'll just... listen to Soren, work through the weird."
She snorted. "He spoke with you too huh?"
"Yeah." He smiled a little.
"Did he also start talking nonsense in your little talk?"
He finally giggled, the heaviness somewhat leaving his body. "Yeah." He sighed. "I'm still not sure what I want to do. All that time I was so mad it was hard to see that I still care about you. I guess I need time to figure it out."
"Okay." His words weren’t easy to hear, but they also gave her hope. He still cared about her. It was all still messed up, but maybe they could fix this together.
They sat in silence, content with looking at the moon in the dark skies above them.
Finally, Callum spoke again. "So you were right. Viren is alive."
She took a shaky breath, then he spoke again. "Were you able to catch up to him? In Umber Tor?"
"No." She turned her head to look down at her pouch again.
He looked at her, knowing that look of her all too well. "Hey. What's wrong?"
Tears started to spill from her eyes again and she jumped a little when Callum took her hand.
She put her free hand in her pouch and took out the small sack. She stared at it for a moment before taking her other hand back from Callum's grip and emptied its contents into her small hand.
Callum watched as three coins rolled from the sack into her palm. She moved her hand closer to him so he could take a better look, and he gasped at what he saw. "R-Rayla. Are those…?"
"Yes." She sniffled.
"Has Viren had them all along?" He asked with a terrified look on his face.
"Claudia had them. Their spirits are stuck inside." She stared at the coins, even though her heart told her to look away. "What do I do now Callum?" She cried, releasing a sob.
He rests a hand on her shoulder. "We'll find a way. We'll free them." He said with a serious voice.
She knows she shouldn't have, but she needed the comfort. She leaned against his shoulder and cried as she held the coins close to her heart. Without a hint of hesitance, Callum put his arm around her shoulder as he held her tight against him.
When her sobs subsided and she was able to catch her breath, she leaned back away from him. "Sorry, I didn't mean to-"
"It okay."
After a few more seconds of silence, she spoke. "Did you find anything from Claudia?"
"No."
"So what's out next step?"
"Right now? Rest. We all very much need it. Ez spoke with queen Zubeia, we'll decide what to do in the morning."
"Alright." She smiled softly at him, then hesitantly asked, "Will you stay with me a little longer?"
"Of course." He smiled back at her and they both turned their gazes once again towards the moon.