Work Text:
‘I say we double the dose. Flush the system. Go big or go home.’ Chase crossed his arms defiantly. Foreman wondered if Chase knew he flicked his eyes to House as he said it, subconsciously seeking validation at his attempt to out-House House on the case. He caught Cameron’s face fall to the slightly disapproving look it often adopted anytime something vaguely unethical was suggested, which was more often than not. House merely rolled his eyes at Chase.
‘Outstanding idea… if we were looking to kill the guy, idiot.’
‘Bock, bock, bock.’
Four pairs of eyes turned to Wilson. He was staring, hands on hips, at House, who looked up at him with slight surprise, as though he had forgotten he was there, called in for his opinion on the likeliness of their case having mycosis fungoides.
‘You, Mr I-read-the-datasheets-before-bed, think a non-FDA approved double dose is a good idea?’ House was giving him a half smile now, eyebrows slightly raised.
‘Oh hell no. It’s dangerous, unnecessarily risky and downright unethical. I’m just surprised you, Mr-I-eat-datasheets-for-breakfast, don’t.’
‘And you think daring me is the sensible thing to do?’
‘No, I think goading you is the sensible thing to do. I’m saving the double dares for when you turn down child organ harvesting.’
‘I still think it’s a valid idea.’ All heads turned back to Chase, who fidgeted slightly under the scrutiny, sounding slightly less sure than before.
‘Child organ harvesting? You dingo-loving, baby-eating monster.’
‘No! I-’ But House had already flicked his attentions back to Wilson, ignoring Chase’s clumsy backtracking.
‘So why are you goading me on something we agree on?’
‘You push the very limits of acceptable medicine every day, to you ethical guidelines are just something that happen to someone else.’
‘There are guidelines? Must have missed that memo.’
‘Which makes me wonder why you aren’t on board with Chase’s idea. It’s perfect, it’s got House written all over it, practically comes with its own ethical board committee.’
‘You know if you say ‘ethical’ one more time a genie appears and grants you three wishes.’
‘Which makes me think it’s because it’s so you, that you’re turning it down. You’re scared you’ve become predictably unpredictable.’
‘How is this helping? Can we get back to the patient now?’ Foreman knew his voice sounded whiney, even to his own ears, but he had been witness to whatever hidden-meaning word-games House and Wilson got up to enough times, to know they never ended quickly or without escalation.
The strangled beeping chorus of four pagers ended the conversation. Wilson sighed to the ceiling and stepped out the way as Chase and Cameron dashed out the door down the corridor. Foreman held the door as House limped through it, not before striking out at Wilson’s shin suddenly with his cane as he passed.
‘Didn't predict that.’