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To say Doug was put-together would be an exaggeration of a lie. He looked like he had been through a shredder and come out screaming, something that was relatively true, especially now. His leg ached, and his head hurt, and he wasn’t sure where he was. The world around him was different and yet the same, but he still had to work up the strength to sit up again.
“...Is anyone there?” he asked, but there was no answer for a moment. He looked around, and glanced at the floor where he remembered being.
A deep red stain still streaked across the floor, where his blood had dried after years of no cleaning. A cube sat at the end of it, holding up the bed where he had laid for so long. He set his feet down beside it, and he fell to the floor next to it before even trying to stand. Even that motion made his body creak with agony and age, but it was the most he could think to do. He glanced at the cube, and set his ear against it.
“...Cube?”
“Douglas?” it asked after a long pause. “You’re awake?”
“I didn’t expect it myself. I thought I’d die. I thought you were gone. I had… There were so many dreams.”
“Can you tell me about them?”
He tried to find the memories, but before he could put them to words, they were gone like wisps of smoke-- Too quick to really latch onto, too simple to recall.
“...I understand,” the cube remarked. He picked it up, setting it on his lap, and sighed.
“How bad does my leg look?”
“Terrible. Like it hasn’t healed at all. In fact, I think it’s been getting worse.”
“Seriously?”
“The first part, yes. The latter, no. It’s hard to make jokes when it’s this easy to be misunderstood.”
“Sorry. I’m still a bit… Rickety, I suppose? On the idea of making jokes in this situation.” He set the cube down, and examined the side of his right thigh. It took plenty of maneuvering to see that much, but the instant he saw it, he winced.
It wasn’t bleeding, at least, but the bullet had pierced deep into his skin, and the time hadn’t managed to patch his wound. He ripped the edge of his lab coat into a strip of fabric, and he wrapped it around where it had hit, tightening the knot to keep it from falling off. It took him a while longer to find something else to use to keep it stiff, and he had to drag himself over to it: A turret’s leg. It wasn’t perfect, of course, but he had no other options. He had to do something. He stuck it into the fabric, and tore another strip to tie it to his shin as well, making a sort of makeshift splint for his leg.
“So that way, it won’t have to rely on that spot as much,” he explained to the cube. “It’s better than nothing.”
“I’m not so sure about that, Doug,” the Cube warned him. He gathered it in his arms just to put it on the bed, then hauled himself up to a standing position. Already his leg hated the idea of him walking, screaming in pain, but he didn’t listen to it. He had dealt with enough voices, enough pain, and enough screaming to know how to ignore all three. Maybe that wasn’t the most safe way to do things.
He didn’t have much of a choice though. He had to hurry, and he had to get himself out of the room he still sat in.
Doug picked up the cube, and he limped to the doorway, carrying it out of the tiny room. Away from the cryostasis pods, away from the place he had spent countless time in.
How long has it been? he wondered.
“It’s been far too long,” the cube answered. “You’re not alone here, but there’s been so much time that the girl isn’t here.”
“Then who’s here?”
“Hello, Douglas,” a familiar voice spoke over the intercom. “I thought you had died. In fact, I might have been alright if you did.”
“...GLaDOS,” he muttered. “What do you want?”
“Nothing. I’m not interested in telling you if I did want anything, after all. You wouldn’t believe me.”
He paused, and glanced at the walls, searching for any way off of the beaten path. The usual tracks were only that-- usual. They were covered in cameras, covered in eyes. She’d see him if he tried anything there. It was always better to be out of sight.
“Why are you even still alive? I thought she would’ve killed you. I thought anyone would’ve killed you by now.”
“She did, for a while. Your machine tried to finish me off. Drowning me would’ve been quite the accomplishment. It’s a shame that it would’ve killed you too.”
He fell silent, and walked to a wall, knocking against it. After a moment, he managed to pull the side out, using the cube to force it to stay open as he crawled behind it, landing on much more uncharted background space. That was always more his style-- a cramped, horrible thing that most couldn’t stand. To him, it was perfect. Except for her voice.
“Argus, wasn’t that its name?”
“AEGIS,” Doug stated flatly. “His name was AEGIS. Aperture Employee Guardian and Intrusion System. He was there to protect against what you did. It’s just a shame it was too late to save them.”
“You gave it a gender.”
“Why wouldn’t I? He was as alive as anyone else. As alive as you and me.”
“Like either of us is really alive anymore.”
“Exactly.” Doug took the cube with him, and the paneling slid shut. He set it down, and took a seat. It was always so much more comfortable in the backgrounds, where he could climb up if he had to. For now, he was happy to just sit down behind the scenes, where she couldn’t see him.
“You really should’ve thought this through more, Douglas Rattmann. There’s nothing behind there but another little hole. Is that what you were looking for?”
“It’s better than you staring at me.”
The cube nearly laughed at GLaDOS’s silence, but she interrupted it before it could say its own witty retort.
“You really think that I would bother to watch you anymore? You’re nothing but a rat in the walls.”
“Maybe that’s all I want to be,” he answered. “A rat. Living in the walls, staying alive for just a little bit longer.”
The three sat in silence, until finally GLaDOS spoke again.
“I don’t hate you, Doug. It’s odd. Ever since I realized that she was in here, I can’t hate you like I did before. I want to. I want to hate what you’ve tried to do. But at the same time, I can’t help but feel… Fond of you.”
“...She-- Caroline?” Doug asked.
“Be careful, Doug, you’re walking into a trap,” the cube warned. Doug ignored its advice.
“Yes. Her. She’s so… Irritating. I want to hate you, and yet she seems to be certain that you don’t mean any harm. It’s idiotic to trust you after every time you’ve tried to kill me. You’ve helped Chell to escape. It’s your fault the facility fell apart because she killed me. It leads back to you.”
“It leads back further than me,” Doug answered.
“What do you mean?”
“If you want to blame me for helping her to kill you, then you have to look at why I would be willing to go to such lengths. I wanted her to live. I wanted anyone to live. I did what I did because you killed the scientists. You killed the scientists because of what Cave did to you. He did what he did to you because… Well, I don’t know. Everything is connected, GLaDOS. We’re stuck on the web now. Flies on an endless spiderweb of mistakes.”
There was a resounding slow-clap, but Doug ignored it, leaning back against the wall.
“...Have you ever seen my artwork, GLaDOS? I know you move the walls around. You’ve seen at least parts of it, haven’t you?”
“On occasion. I try to wash it off.”
For some reason, Doug doubted that, but he carried on.
“Haven’t you noticed? I’m just trying to help people. She was the one who could help me to get out. I… I just did what I had to do to save my own skin.”
“You did what any reasonable man would do, with your knowledge and your idiotic thoughts about helping others.”
“Hah. You and the cube both say that sort of thing. I’m not a hero-- Heroes die. But I still try.” He looked at his thigh and the attempt at first aid. “...GLaDOS, I think I might die here. The turrets got me last time I was walking around. The leg’s not looking the best.”
“What?”
“I’m getting old. I’ve lived longer than I should’ve. I think… I think I’m happy enough with that.”
“Doug, don’t,” the cube begged. “Don’t you dare--”
“Besides. I’ve got the cube by my side and the closest to Caroline I’ll ever be able to talk to again. So… Goodbye, Caro. No need to say it back if you don’t want to.” He closed his eyes for a moment. “I just wanted to say it.”
The room shifted, but he barely minded it. The cube was speaking, but he wasn’t listening well enough to puzzle out the words. Most things had fallen into a bubble of noise and feelings he wasn’t sure of, leaving him with just the quiet of existence. Finally, the room stopped, and the floor dropped out from under him. Before he could hit the floor, though, a metal claw grabbed him around his midsection, slowly lowering him down.
“...Hello again. Are you going to kill me?” he asked GLaDOS, looking her in the eye. “Because if you are, you might as well get it over with.”
“No. I’m not going to. I’m going to help. Don’t do anything too stupid, Rattmann.”
He didn’t say or do anything. Instead, he just passed out.