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Shelly walked to a pet store and said "Sell me your meanest goose". The cashier handed him the menace of the store, Manfred von Goosema.
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Manfred von Goosema was a menace not just to the store but to all of society. He honked and hissed at Shelly, but Shelly didn't care he just grabbed Manfred by the throat and walked out of the store. He had business to take care of
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.
Manfred von Goosema would not stand for this, and loudly he honked a demand to race Shelly. Shelly looked down at the goose he had his hand wrapped around the throat of and stared in contemplation. Should he race this goose?
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"I shall," he thought. "For this is my alpha way."
Shelly let go of the goose's throat and it suddenly honked loudly before waddling away quickly. It was hard for the assassin to catch up. But he had to win this race, if it was the last thing he did.
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The goose waddled as fast as he could and shelly tried to catch up to the goose. If only they didn't fight in the past, they would have been together. While racing, they were thinking about everything they have been through. All the hardships, the sacrifices, the tazing of random people. These images showed up like those anime flashbacks while d
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ashing to catch the goose.
At last, due to Shelly's immense training in athletics and spry constitution, he was able to catch the goose first. Manfred fell to his knees and let out a guttural cry of despair. His perfect win record once again dashed. He screamed for what seemed like hours.
Shelly walked up to him, contemplating their shared past, and trying to decide how to handle the situation. The goose was still wriggling in his thick, thicc arms.
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Manfred the goose was very depressed because his perfect win record had been destroyed, by Shelly of all people. But for now, he had to escape Shellys thick, thicc arms.
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He flapped his big goose wings, he kicked his little goose feet, and he honked his loud goose honk. However, no matter how much he tried, he could not escape the trained assassin. Desperately, he tried to signal his daughter, Franzchicka von Goosema, but it was to no avail- she was busy trying to steal Gumshoe's coat and was not paying attention to him. Manfred began to panic as Shelly De Killer began carrying him towards a fr
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ied chicken place, oh fuck oh shit shelly was going to turn him into fried chicken. but wait he was a goose?? was this even possible? he didn't know what to do, his struggling wasn't helping and was merely exhausting him more. he watched as shelly brought him to the back of the store and picked up a very, very sharp looking knife. shelly held von goosema down and raised the knife above his head, preparing to bring it down on the frail neck of von goosema. he envisioned his near future, being served to a family in a basket of chicken wings, legs, and breast.
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"Goodbye" said Shelly de Killer.
Soon there was a new sale at the local KFC. A goose special. The order was called "Chicken for the father-less".
It was Miles' new favourite snack.