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The Kissing Chronicles

Summary:

The Kissing Chronicles (Part One). For fun, the Black Bulls decide to play a kissing game. Some team members have fun playing the game, some don't care, and some are, well... Traumatized! But that's okay, because it's just a game... Right?

Notes:

Just a story idea I thought was simple and fun.

(See the end of the work for more notes.)

Work Text:

A kissing game. Yes, the idea was exactly as ludicrous and ridiculously stupid as it sounded. It had everyone in the squad squirming around on the ground as if mana controlled tentacles were invading their pants. Many of them were excited, some of them were nervous, and most of them were extremely to officially annoyed.

"Are we seriously 'bouta do this?" Zora mumbled with little enthusiasm as he slouched forward, his gaze pitiful as he looked around at the goofy human circle they had made.

Vanessa, unsurprisingly, cackled loudly and winked as she stumbled to the middle of the circle, "Ha! You bet'cha, sweetie." She stopped and proudly lifted up an empty bottle of wine, "Alright, listen up, cuties. I think the rules of this game speak for themselves, hm?"

"You don't have to sound so damn gross about it," Magna grumbled. 

"Someone remind me how I let myself get dragged into this again?" Yami yawned while rubbing the back of his neck tiredly. 

Asta shook his fists in excitement while cheering, "I think it sounds like a really fun idea... Though I've never really kissed anyone before, I'd be happy to let one of you be my first." 

"You too, Rasta?" Magna jerked away from the magicless goof ball sitting beside him, "Chill out."

"I'd be honored to be your first kiss, Asta. As friends, I believe we should all be more open with one another and share greater affection. This can be our first training session as friends," Gordon spoke passionately. 

"Eeh! I-I-I'm too em-embarrassed to k-kiss anyone. N-not like this," Grey whimpered while covering her entire face in both hands, and then into her knees for good measure. 

"Sounds like fun to me," Luck giggled innocently. 

"As long as I get to keep eating, I don't care who I kiss," Charmy sputtered through a mouth full of food. 

Noelle puffed her cheeks out and crossed her arms, "Well I think this is pointless." Honestly she was a storm of squeals on the inside. 

Finral grinned while eyeballing every lady in the room. If there was a chance he got to kiss a pretty lady then count him in. He chuckled, already daydreaming about how wonderful it could be. Ah, women were the goddesses of being the only ones privileged enough to grace his lips with their pleasant, soft warmth. Eh... To far? Yeah, too far. Finral blushed. 

"I've never... Kissed anyone... Either," Henry hollered from his personal box just a few meters away, "It sounds... Like... Fun!" 

"Marie..." Gauche's nose bled as he stared at a picture of his little sister. 

Secre blinked and silently marveled at how adventurous the newest generations could be. As long as nothing had to be enthusiastic or romantic, then she guessed it was alright if she played along. 

"Alright, let's do this," Vanessa stuck her tongue out while summoning all of her mightiest strength to help give the glass bottle a good spin. 

As the bottle began to dance, a few excited gasps filled the atmosphere as well as irritated groans and nervous whimpers. Nearly everyone was leaning forward in anticipation to watch, eagerly waiting to see who the bottle pointed to. When it finally did come to a stop, many of the Black Bulls either hummed or giggled while looking to their most royal member of all. 

"What- already?" Noelle squealed, her face dark red as she sat up straight in puzzlement. 

Vanessa laughed loudly and pointed at her, "Looks like you're first, fancy pants. Come on. Come give momma some sugar."

"Ahh- I'm having second thoughts about this!" Noelle stammered and covered her flustered face after taking in Vanessa's overly suggestive stare and puckered lips. Plus she was almost completely naked. Oh, why'd she have to get the most indecent one? Why couldn't it have been Asta... 

"Yeash, I knew you were a baby, but I didn't think you'd cry this much," Magna scuffed. 

"Hey," Noelle immediately protested, "I-I'm not crying. I-I... I'm royalty! That's it, and we royals are above playing such ridiculous games." 

"Aww, come on," Vanessa stepped forward and lifted her hand out, "It'll be fun. I promise. Just let loose. It's only for fun, remember?" 

Noelle looked at her and thought about it for a second. Despite the pressure being suffocating, all they were doing was playing a silly game. It was supposed to be fun, right? Besides, Asta was playing so she might as well too. "Hmp," Noelle knocked back a strand of hair and took Vanessa's hand, "I'm sure you've probably never kissed a royal before. I guess it's only fair of me to give you a taste of how great we are." 

"No one cares," Luck giggled. 

"Yeah, just hurry up and kiss her already," Yami muttered, "Prissy pants."

"Excuse me-" Vanessa cut Noelle off by tugging her forward, grabbing her by the back of the head and pressing their lips together. 

It happened as fast as it started. Their lips came together for a good two seconds and then fell apart. Noelle's shocked, flustered squeals would be legendary. The royal's face quickly turned vivid red and she was twisting away to cover her embarrassment. "I can't believe my first kiss.... Was with a whacky, wine obsessed witch..." 

"Impeccable, wasn't it?" Vanessa laughed, obviously amused by the poor royal's flustered state. She grinned and winked at the next in line, "You're turn." 

"Alright," Finral happily crawled forward, excited for the chance to kiss a lovely, beautiful woman. Charmy, Grey and Secre were the only ones left. He still had a chance. "Here it goes." He spun the bottle.

Finral had his fingers crossed, his fists shaking as he eagerly awaited the final results. Oh, this was going to be awesome! Finally, he'd get to kiss a pretty woman, and the best part was that they wouldn't be able to reject him this time. This was the best idea the Black Bulls had ever thought of. 

Just as Finral began writhing in the glorious thoughts of getting to kiss a pretty girl, the bottle coming to an unfortunately tragic halt slapped him far harder than any reject ever had. Yami. The bottle landed on none other than their hard-headed, bathroom obsessed, muscle brained captain. If the thud from Finral's jaw hitting the floor wasn't audible then his groans of terror certainly were. 

"Th-this... This can't be happening," He whined, his confidence shattered, "I... I thought I'd finally get to kiss a girl, but now..."

"You tryin' to tell me I ain't pretty 'nough to kiss, portal boy?" Yami loomed over him with a dangerous, dark aura surrounding his large body. 

"Wha-ha!" Finral yelped and skittered back, "N-no, sir, I-I'm..." Dead! He was so dead! And if this life threatening kiss didn't happen to kill him then he was certainly going to go outside himself, dig his own grave, and then die. 

"Then quit your belly-achin' and get up here already," Yami demanded and hauled his personalized, human door dash to his feet. 

Finral barely had time to laugh nervously before Yami roughly pressed their lips together in a quick, chaste kiss. His entire body felt like it had turned to stone and then cracked from humiliation. By the time they separated, he was limp in his captain's arms, tears of despair and shock pouring down his cherry red cheeks.

Unsurprisingly, Yami laughed aloud and drug him away, "Best damn kiss you'll ever have, that's for sure, haha!" 

"My first kiss... Was with my captain," Finral mumbled incoherently as he sagged lifelessly in his captain's hold. So... About that grave now? 

Everyone laughed and scooted closer to help shut the shrinking circle. "I wanna go next," Luck shouted happily and crawled forward, wasting no time in spinning the bottle with everything he had, "Here goes. Hey, instead of kissing whoever I get, can I fight them?" 

"You know, I honestly heard that coming from a mile away," Magna sighed and palmed his forehead, "You have some serious issues, buddy." 

"You're only saying that because you know I'll beat you," Luck giggled. 

"Yeah right," Magna raised a fist at him. 

Luck grinned at him, mischievous and practically insane as always, "Wanna bet?" 

"Focus, you morons," Gauche grumbled and gestured to the stopped bottle. 

Both Luck and Magna turned their heads to see Secre standing up with the bottle pointing directly at her. "Aw, no fair. I was hoping to fight you, Magna," Luck laughed it off and gave his best friend a polite yet painfully shocking pat on the back, "Oh well. Better luck next time!" 

"Ahh! You're gonna pay for that, ya little-" Magna growled. 

"Wanna fight?" Luck asked cheerfully as he stood up. 

Secre merely blinked at him and spoke softly, "No thank you." 

"Ok," Luck happily accepted and leaned forward to give the quiet girl a small peck on the lips. "Yay, that was fun!" 

"Well that was boring," Magna grumbled. 

In the background, Finral continued to mourn, "My first kiss... Was with my captain..." 

"Alright, eight left," Vanessa cheered with drunken enthusiasm, "I hope someone here'll get real sloppy, haha!" 

"You're such a pervert," Noelle stated flatly. 

"It's time for the real action to start," Magna cracked his knuckles loudly and crawled forward to spin the bottle with some extra bedazzle from his fire magic, "Now that's how you do it right there." 

"If only your kissing was as good as your magic, right Magna?" Luck hollered mischievously. 

"Why you-" 

"And how would you know that, Luck?" Vanessa winked at the frozen blonde. 

Luck could only smile, for once not sure what to say, "Uh..." 

"Wait, you two aren't actually... You know... Are you?" Noelle blushed at the thought. 

"My first kiss... Was with my captain..." 

"Oh, so you two are in love!" Shouted Asta with stars glowing excitedly in his eyes, "Wow, that's so awesome. Congrats you guys, I'm so happy for you." 

"You idiots, we're not in love!" Magna stuck his tongue out in mock repulsion and talked goofily, "Whafs wron wif you guys? Ugh, gross." 

"Well it seems now you get to put those kissing skills you're so proud of to the test," Spoke one of their most arrogant squad members. 

"Eh?" Magna turned to see who the bottle had landed on only to see a set of fangs moving closer to him. He sat in place for a moment before sucking his tongue back in and throwing his hands up in surrender, "I'm out." 

"What- Magna, you can't leave," Cried Asta. 

"There's no way I'm kissing that- I mean look at him. How're you supposed to kiss someone when they don't have any lips-" 

"Ahem," Zora obnoxiously cleared his throat. 

Magna turned back to see that the red head's mask had been lowered down beneath his chin thus allowing his mouth- very much not filled with fangs- to glisten in the dim lighting. So apparently those fangs were just a part of the mask? Weird, but that didn't stop the moment from feeling like a phenomenon. Just the sight of his pierced, plump lips had Magna blushing in both admiration and disbelief. 

"So you've had a normal mouth under there this whole time and you never showed us till now?" Magna pointed an offended finger at the other commoner. 

Zora simply shrugged, his eyes slanted with flirty suggestion, "Guess I never had any reason to until now, did I?" He smirked. 

Magna gasped a little, feeling helpless against the glow that was rising up inside his cheeks. He had fooled around and kissed a few people in his time, but never had he been in an actual relationship. Not that he's saying that that's where this would lead! Whoa, calm down there. Magna blushed and bit his lip, but quickly reminded himself that this was a game and they were on literal display. 

Dinner should be served, not wasted! 

"Well alright, hot shot, bring it," Magna grinned and scooted closer. 

Zora's smirk widened challengly and he swiftly moved forward, snaked a hand behind the other magic knight's head and pressed their lips together. Sparks of fire crackled from Magna's head and shoulders immediately causing Zora to chuckle softly before pressing them more firmly together. Their lips intersected and became coated with saliva. 

Magna gripped Zora's shoulders and pushed him away. They panted, staring at each other with sweaty, red faces and heavy eyes. It was instantaneous how they both thought 'screw it!' and shoved against each other again, this time with more fever and passion. Zora ended up knocking Magna to the ground where the both of them snogged like love-sick puppies. 

Everyone around them gaped in slight bewilderment. "Wow, they're really going at it, huh?" Asta stared in shock at the scene. 

"I'll say," Noelle scoffed before seeing a sudden light fill the room, "What the...?" 

Everyone in the room winced and covered their eyes. "Ugh, where's that stupid light coming from?" Gauche snarled. 

"I-I-It's so bright, uh!" Grey whined loudly. 

"My first kiss... Was with my captain." 

"Whoa! Look... at... Magna's body. It's... glowing!" Pointed Henry. 

"Wha- is that natural?" Stammered a confused Asta as he studied the enormous, whitish-orange glow radiating around the two love-sick snoogy boogies. 

"Gross, get a room!" Noelle blushed and covered her eyes. 

"Ha! Now that's what I'm talking about!" Vanessa cheered wildly, "Go, go go!" 

Yami shook his head and blew out a large cloud of smoke, "Come on, wheels, you know what to do." 

"Die a painful, slow death?" Finral offered miserably. 

"We all will 'less ya send them to a damn room already. Come on, snap out of it," Yami hollered and helped Finral to sit up. 

Much to everyone's fortune, a space portal opened up beneath the two kiss-obsessed love bugs and stole them away to have their privacy in a different room. Many grateful sighs of innocent relief were given. Luck was the only one who openly laughed, "You think Magna's gonna lose his virginity tonight?" 

"Guh! How can you ask that so casually?" Noelle squealed in horror. 

"You can probably bet on it. Those two numbskulls'v been makin' googly eyes at each other for weeks now," Yami huffed and rolled his eyes, "Amateurs... What'a 'bout you, wheels, you lookin' to lose your virginity tonight too?"

Finral felt as if he had been shot by poisonous arrows. His face became red and flustered whilst his voice turned high pitched, "Ah-how can you even suggest such a thing!" 

"I'm not hearing a 'no'-" 

"No! No way! Absolutely not!" Finral shouted and flailed his arms about, "You're my captain. U-us- that would be..." 

"Yay, it's finally my turn," Asta trembled with excitement as he crawled forward and grabbed the misplaced bottle. Secretly, he looked to Vanessa who gave him a small nod and a flick of her fingers; silently stating that she still knew the drill. He smiled, sat back and spun the bottle, "Aw, I'm so excited! I finally get to have my first kiss." 

"I hope your first kiss is with me, Asta, it would be such an honorable privilege seeing as how we're both best friends," Gordon quietly stated and placed a hand over his chest. 

Charmy hummed while chowing down on a plate of food, "I don't know what's going on. I just know that this food is really, really yummy, hehe!" 

"Marie..." Gauche probably didn't know what was going on either. 

Asta grinned at them and looked back down at the spinning bottle. He knew that this was just a game, and it really was fun playing it, but beforehand he had secretly asked Vanessa to rig the bottle for him. Don't worry. He had a perfectly good reason for it. Sure it took some of the excitement away, but he knew that the results it gained would be well worth the sacrifice. 

Within thirty seconds, the bottle finally came to it's destined stop, and Asta could already feel happiness swell in his chest at the sound of Henry's slow, shocked gasp. "Oh... I get... To... Kiss you... Asta," The cursed magic knight grinned with wonder. 

Asta giggled and stood up to face the long haired knight who had no choice but to sit a good thirty feet away from them. "That's right, we get to be each other's first kiss," He cheerfully exclaimed and walked over to the carefully standing squad member. 

"I'm so happy... That it's you," Henry pushed his bangs back and smiled big at the magicless knight, "I don't think... That I... Could have... Kissed any... Of... The others." 

"I know, we make a pretty great match, don't we?" Asta chuckled, his cheeks becoming extra warm as he stopped in front of the taller man. He already knew that Henry wouldn't have been able to kiss any of the other team members; that's why he had Vanessa rig the bottle. Just because this didn't come as a surprise to him like it did for everyone else didn't mean that it was any less fun or meaningful. This was both their first kiss. It would mean everything no matter what. 

"Yes... We do," Henry blushed, his pretty, yellow eyes filled with bashfulness, warmth and content. Slowly he wrapped one arm around Asta's waist and carefully pulled him in. Contact with this one magicless knight was the only contact he had had in his whole life, and now he was getting to experience a real kiss. Somehow it made him feel a little less destructive and burdensome. 

Asta, too, felt himself blushing as he gazed up into Henry's beautiful, longing eyes. With hands blessed with fondness, he reached up and cupped his face, his thumbs brushing his hollow cheek bones. He wanted to say that Henry needed to focus on eating more, but for this moment he decided it could wait and leaned up on his tip-toes. 

With a exhale of breath their lips came in contact, Asta's smooth and plump while Henry's were thin and chapped. They both jolted, their hearts hammering fast inside their chests. Cheeks burning, they pressed each other closer together, their heads angling slightly so their lips could intersect. It only lasted for a few seconds. 

Asta continued to tenderly hold Henry's face while pulling away, their eyes magically welded together and bodies still. It was as if neither one of them wanted to let go. Asta's fingers, gentle and kind, stroked up the sides of Henry's cheeks and pushed his long hair back.

"That was..." Henry bit his lip in slight embarrassment and overwhelming happiness.

"I know..." Asta nodded, his head bowed for a few seconds before his eyes burst' back open with loving amazement, "That was amazing! I'm so glad you we got to be each other's first kiss. You're amazing Henry!" 

Henry, at first, seemed taken back, but soon the warmth from Asta's natural excitement settled and made him feel even more content inside. He blushed and thought about how lucky he was to have someone like him in his life. Asta didn't just sweep the dust from his room... He swept the loneliness from his heart. 

"Hey, after this we should grab something to eat together. Sound good?" Asta asked and went to stand beside his kissing partner. 

Henry nodded, "I'd... Like that." Whenever something touched his arm, he gazed down and felt his heart skip a beat whenever Asta slipped his hand in front of his palm, their fingers intersecting. Was... Was this really just a kissing game? 

In front of them the rest of the group stared in quiet joy. Vanessa smiled and bowed her head thoughtfully, her fingers flicking off the threads of fate. Yami sighed in content while silently admitting proudly that he had the best damn crew any captain could ever ask for. 

"If you're all done sightseeing, someone help me get this crybaby to kiss me already," Gauche grumbled impatiently and pointed to the cowering girl sitting beside him. 

"N-n-n-n-no, d-don't! Please, I-I've n-never k-k... K-k-k-kissed anyone before!" Grey cried and frantically shook her head. 

"Oh boy," Vanessa shook her head, "This'll probably take a while..." 

In the background, Asta chuckled and looked up at his partner. Henry met his eyes with a timid blush, their hands squeezing together as Asta bumped into his side. He was small but strong. Maybe he wasn't enough to lift the curse from his body, but he was enough to lift the curse from his heart. Henry smiled and pressed his cheek to the top of Asta's head, thinking about nothing more than how much he loved this. 

About how much he loved Asta. 

 


Bonus

"Hey," Charmy poked Gordon's upper arm. It had been well over an hour and no one could get Grey to kiss Gauche, and worse yet was the fact that they were still trying! "I don't think they're gonna kiss, and we're the last match, so..." 

Gordon, who had been sad at the thought that he would be the only one unable to get a kiss, gasped in delight and grinned happily. "Of course," He nodded and lifted his arms out. Charmy held onto his shoulders, pulled herself up and pecked his lips.


The End. 

Notes:

Of course Gordon got his kiss! I'd never leave a player hanging :')

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