Chapter Text
Remus couldn't remember a time when he hadn't felt like this, a time where his mind wasn't intoxicated by the thought of an end, the thought of peace at last. The thought of quiet. and he tried, tried so hard, for his (albeit stoic) father, for Pete, for Dorcas, and for that one lovely old woman who often lingered through the thoroughly depressing Tesco express where Remus worked, buying only a pack of Mayfair sky blue every time, but it was too much now. He knew he just couldn't handle it anymore. They would understand right? At least they'd know he's finally calm. God they wouldn't blame themselves would they? No. No they couldn't no. They would have to understand!
It was this predicament which Sirius stumbled across at the ungodly hour of 3:56am, where he was faced by the sight of a troubled man nearing dangerously close to a cliffs edge. appalled by what on earth possessed a man to do such a reckless thing , he strode up to the mysterious figure, prepared to tell him how ridiculous he was being, who knows what dangerous creatures and predators are up at this time! (well okay Sirius knew, but he was one so does it really count) at least that was the plan, until he turned his head. A scarred masterpiece with sandy curls tumbling over a tear streaked face, with eyes comparable to a pool of molten gold boring straight into his soul was facing him.
It was then Sirius realised exactly what he had on his hands. Despite not being entirely mortal, Sirius understood the feeling of wanting to end it at a painfully deep level
He himself has lived this reality a terrifying amount of times through his many lonely years, for this reason Sirius knew that despite his murky moral compass, the man was now his responsibility to fix. Over his cold dead body would he let this man single handedly steal god's very own magnum opus from this world.
It took about long enough for Sirius to figure this out that it did for Remus to process his presence lurking behind him, a picture of pure despair painting across the dark haired man's usually unbothered face. And the perfect mirror of such an expression graced Remus' own as the reality of what was going on overtook him.
He had planned it perfectly! it was a Tuesday morning, 4am, nobody should be here, it was supposed to go perfectly and now this? Now what?! How can he explain this!?
Interrupting the shocked seconds of silence Sirius quickly spoke up
'I'd really like if you stepped away from that ledge right now??! not to be selfish mate but I'll need years of therapy I can't afford to get over this if you don't!! fuck! no sorry just...god sorry I have no idea what to do I'm so sorry'
a meek 'i-what?!' left Remus lips, shock and embarrassment overcoming him
' I know you don't know me and I don't know you, and god this is weird, but I know that your gonna really fucking regret it if you do this, and I know I couldn't live with myself if you did, which could be an issue for me! so please just- just get away from there. I'm sorry you feel like this is the only option but it's not. it's not I promise you! and hey! we can talk. or not, I can call someone. or we can sit? please I just need you to do this for me'.
Conflicted, Remus stood there glued to the ground, eyes the size of sauce pans and a mouth seemingly permanently fixed into an 'o' shape. Maybe it had been a sign, a sign he shouldn't do this, or perhaps just a terrible coincidence. Either way he couldn't do this when that man was there, he was right it wouldn't be fair, he couldn't!
Hesitantly Remus took a step forward from the edge, preparing to swiftly thank the man and rush to his car, back to the safety of his apartment away from all prying eyes, until he felt the clawing of a branch grasp his ankle, and he was pulled back. As if in slow motion the man's arms flailed up, horror glazed over his eyes, the taupe ringlets falling back along with his slender body. Instant terror consumed Sirius, as he ran in attempt to grab the man. but it was too late , he knew it was too late to catch him as he heard a petrifying splash in the ocean deep below. Without a second thought, Sirius followed him off the ledge , diving with the grace of a ballerina through the air. He came up spluttering urgently, and made an immediate attempt to locate this man. He couldn't have survived it though , could he? at least he shouldn't have! a fall from such a height would be enough to kill anyone! alas Sirius continued to struggle through the lapping waves (god he hates water) grabbing at anything remotely body shaped to find the man. Just as he came to the conclusion he had no hope, his desperate hands suddenly came to contact with a sodden corduroy jacket, with a cold, limp boy attached.
Sirius instantly made his way to the closest bit of land as he surveyed his find. His neck was at an abnormal angle, and his pulse, god it was barely there. and fuck he hated this. Sirius hated what he was about to do to him, and hated himself for what this poor broken boy would have to live with. He hated that he knew there was no other choice. Hate filled his body as he flung his hair back and sunk his teeth into the pale, wet neck before him. Tears tracked his already sodden face as he held it to the slowing pulse of blood through the boys jugular, swiftly filling instead with a recipe for misery and loneliness... and hate. A life much like Sirius' was.