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Riki didn’t understand, he really didn’t. He didn’t know when exactly his hyungs stopped seeing him as the maknae and started treating Sunoo like he was the maknae instead. It had been going on for more than a month by now and he just didn’t get why.
“Riki, stop messing around we’ve been over this multiple times! You’re the main dancer, you should have it by now.”
While Sunoo would get :
“It’s okay if you’re struggling Sunoo-ah, hyung will help you. It goes like this.”
One night, Riki was feeling awfully homesick and was seeking out Jake for cuddles. He found the older with Jay on the couch and went over to him but was met with :
“I’m not in the mood for skinship right now Riki. Go ask someone else.”
Riki could understand that his hyung wasn’t in the mood for physical affection but the fact Jake didn’t even offer any words of comfort or as Riki if he was okay left a pang in his heart.
The youngest went and asked Jay next but was just brushed off :
“I know you miss home, but you’ll be able to visit soon Riki-ah. I just don’t want to cuddle right now.”
Riki was hurt. The fact that his hyungs just brushed him off and basically sent them away stung a lot. The youngest had made up his mind to just retreat to the bathroom and mope there for a while. Riki had stayed in there for several minutes, he didn’t cry but he just sat there thinking about why his hyungs just kept seeming to push him away.
He understood Jake and Jay not feeling up for skin-ship but what really bothered him was how they just brushed Riki off while he was clearly upset. Riki was sensitive sure, but he wasn’t truly an emotional person; he didn’t cry easily and kept his feelings to himself a lot. His hyungs spent so long trying to break down his walls and now that they had, it seemed like they almost didn’t care anymore.
When he returned to the living room, hoping to just sit aside and at least find some sort of comfort in being near his hyungs while his homesickness plagued him, Riki felt his heart drop to his stomach when he saw Jake and Jay who were supposedly ‘not in the mood for skin-ship’ cuddling up to Sunoo who was sandwiched between them.
Sunoo looked absolutely content in the arms of the older two and Jay and Jake had a look of adoration in their eyes as they stared at the younger.
Riki had wanted to cry or yell at them, but he didn’t. Instead he just went to his room and hid under his blankets.
Even Jungwon who was younger than Sunoo was participating in the doting on the third youngest member and Riki had no idea why.
He’s been wondering for weeks if he did something to upset his hyungs but every time he thought about it his mind came up blank. It just happened : Sunoo had taken Riki’s spot as the maknae.
The whole situation had been causing Riki a ridiculous amount of stress. He would stay up late into the night thinking about whatever he could’ve done wrong for his hyungs to stop treating him like the maknae and he wasn’t even eating properly. As Riki already had a naturally smaller appetite, it really wasn’t good that he wasn’t eating sufficiently every day but he just couldn’t bring himself to.
The stress and hurt of feeling like he’d been cast aside by his members caused a physical toll on his body. Riki knew he’d lost some weight and dizzy spells were starting to become and almost everyday occurence.
The day after the cuddling incident, Riki was just in a downtrodden mood. The group had a radio interview for KBS radio. The dancer had once again gotten out of bed and was greeted with a dizzy spell and a dull ache in his head. Riki tried to eat a little food that morning as he knew the group had to get through schedules today but he still ate way less than he should’ve, his hyungs didn’t notice, it wasn’t like he expected them to.
Riki had just taken some ibuprofen for his headache before the group left the dorm to the KBS building. The entire ride there, none of Riki’s hyungs spoke to him and he also ended up sitting alone in the back of the van and that just made the boy’s mood sour more.
When they arrived at the studio, they greeted the radio hosts before moving to be seated for the show. There were two trios of seats and one single seat due to the size of the table and amount of people in the room. Riki was hoping to get to sit with two of his hyungs but instead Heeseung and Sunghoon took seats on either side of Sunoo.
“Aish, no fair I wanted to sit with Sun,” Jay groaned at the eldest and Sunghoon.
“You snooze, you lose hyung,” Sunoo teased the older.
Jay just huffed before slinging an arm around Jungwon’s shoulder.
“Alright well Wonie, you’re sitting with Jake and I,” the second eldest smiled at the leader.
“I have no problem there hyung,” Jungwon smiled at Jay before taking the seat between him and Jake.
Unfortunately, that left Riki to sit alone. He really didn’t want to but he knew that it would be pointless and childish to complain so he just moved over to the single seat across the table from his hyungs, sat down and adjusted his mic and headphones.
After that, the radio show commenced, all the members were laughing and talking while telling stories and speaking with the hosts. Riki stayed quiet most of the time and only spoke when he was asked something by the hosts, the members themselves didn’t even acknowledged him.
They were going through some questions about the group when the host asked something,
“So who is your maknae again? I’ve kind of forgotten,” the woman said kindly.
Heeseung spoke up, “Our maknae is Sunoo- oh my god wait! That’s not right I’m sorry,” the oldest laughed.
The hosts and the rest of the members joined in on laughing at Heeseung’s mistake but Riki didn’t. It was a mistake right? He shouldn’t be upset, but Heeseung said it so quickly and with so much confidence, did he really forget that Riki was the maknae?
After the laughter died down the eldest spoke again, “Yes sorry for my mistake but Ni-ki is our maknae.”
“Ahh really, he doesn’t look like it, he’s so tall and his face is so mature,” the male commented, sounding shocked.
Riki just gave a fake smile to the host who was looking at him in surprise. That was something that always bothered him, was people saying he didn’t ‘look like a maknae’. Don’t get Riki wrong, he loved how his face had matured as he got older and was proud of how tall he became but whenever people said he didn’t look like a maknae it irked something in him. Why were the youngest members almost always perceived to have a certain look?
He’s seen the comments on Twitter and WeVerse about him. That he doesn’t look like the youngest at all and that Jungwon or Sunoo look more like and would fit better as maknaes and those comments always made him feel weird, like he was wrong for looking or behaving like he did because it wasn’t ‘maknae’ enough.
Riki was broken out of his thoughts at the sound of a chuckle from Sunghoon,
“I know it’s shocking, he’s taller than all of us and doesn’t even act like the youngest a lot of the time. He really isn’t like a maknae.”
Jungwon giggled before he nodded, “Lots of our fans actually think me or Sunoo-hyungie are the youngest before they find out it’s Ni-ki and some still forget sometimes.”
“I mean I can understand why, look at Wonie and Sunoo, they’re adorable and two of our shortest members. They just look like maknaes,” Jay added.
Jake lifted a hand up and poked Jungwon’s dimple, Jay laughed before following suit and poking the leader’s other dimple.
The hosts and the other members besides Riki cooed. Heeseung and Sunghoon both brought up a hand and squished Sunoo’s cheeks.
The members all laughed and cooed.
“Look at them, they’re so cute,” Jake laughed.
“Our maknaes are so cute,” Sunghoon commented.
Riki felt his heart pang again but tried to keep a smile plastered on his face at his other members. He hated that he felt jealous seeing his hyungs dote on Sunoo and Jungwon like this but he couldn’t help it. Hearing Sunghoon say ‘our maknaes’ while Riki wasn’t even included in that statement just made Riki feel left out.
“They are very cute,” the female host agreed while laughing.
“So which member do you all enjoy doting on the most?” the male host, “I would assume it’s Ni-ki~ssi since he’s the maknae?” the man questioned.
The members all looked at each other before turning back to the hosts.
“Well that would actually be incorrect,” Heeseung said, “Riki’s so independent he really doesn’t need a lot of attention so the members I enjoy doting on a lot are Sunoo or Jungwon because they always enjoy being doted on.”
Sunghoon agreed, “Heeseung-hyung’s right they actually do require a lot of attention which we are more than willing to give.”
Jay nodded, “I’m usually the one looking after those two the most, Engenes even say they’re like my children which I don’t mind of course. They’re my babies,” the second eldest told the two maknae-liners sweetly, causing them to blush.
Jake hummed in agreement, “Riki’s just Riki, he does just fine on his own a lot of the time.”
Riki had to bite back a scoff at everything his hyungs were saying. Were they all really that oblivious that they’d completely neglected looking after him for weeks? Did they know nothing about Riki? Yes Riki was independent but he was also young and sensitive. He thrived off attention quite frankly and though he didn’t admit it like Jungwon and Sunoo did, he liked being doted on and cared for.
There were a lot of things that he couldn’t do on his own but it seems his hyungs had just forgotten that or they just didn’t care. Maybe they just wanted Sunoo and Jungwon as the maknaes instead of Riki.
The rest of the interview went on with Riki staying quiet, he didn’t crack any jokes or tease any of the members. He’d only speak when one of the hosts addressed him and it seemed like even his own group members had forgotten he was there as none of them spoke to him either.
That night, Riki skipped dinner and just laid in bed. After the radio show he was in an even worse mood than the one he had woken up in that morning. No one had even come to check on him or call him for food. He just felt so neglected, he didn’t get why his hyungs had cast him aside and started treating him like he wasn’t the maknae.
His headache from that morning had returned with a vengeance and him stressing out wasn’t helping him at all. After several hours of tossing and turning in bed Riki fell into an uneasy sleep.
Riki kicked off sheets and turned on his side to see his roommates still asleep in their beds. His headache had increased into a migraine and him moving around made his head hurt more. Riki looked over to the alarm clock on the dresser and saw that it was only a few minutes after 5:00. The dancer let out a groan as his head pounded in his skull. Riki felt saliva fill his mouth and bile shoot up into his throat.
His eyes widened and he shot up into a sitting position. Riki really didn’t want to throw up but the nausea was starting to increase tenfold. He tried to swallow back the bile in his throat but more came back. The boy shot up off the bed, not caring how much noise he made as he dashed out of his room and down the hallway to the bathroom.
Riki slammed the bathroom door open and crashed to his knees in front of the toilet. It only took a second before he began puking into the toilet. As he didn’t really eat the day prior only bile and stomach acid burned his throat as they were expelled out of his body.
After dry heaving for a few seconds, his vomiting finally ceased so he wiped his mouth with a piece of toilet paper and shut the lid before flushing the toilet. Riki folded his arms over the toilet seat and placed his head on them. His entire body ached and he felt far too weak to move from the position as gross as it may be.
Riki let a few minutes pass before he got up off the floor and rinsed his mouth, as well as brushed his teeth. His head was still pounding and he really didn’t feel good but at least it was early enough in the morning that he could go back to bed and sleep off however he was feeling.
Miraculously, Riki didn’t wake up any of the members in his rush to the bathroom. The boy all but collapsed on his bed after he quietly shut the door to his room behind him. He almost instantly fell asleep when his head hit the pillow and he hoped he’d feel better later.
“Riki! Get up we have practice!” Jungwon yelled as he entered the room.
The leader’s loud voice woke up Riki and instantly reminded him of the pounding in his head as he opened his eyes and the bright lights sent a pulsating pain through his head.
Riki just groaned from the pain and rolled onto his side, ignoring Jungwon who was still calling for him to get up.
“Come on Riki-ah, we’re running late we have to go,” the leader coaxed him as he pulled off Riki’s sheets.
The youngest once again groaned as he slowly opened his eyes and tried to let them adjust to the brightness of the bedroom.
“Okay, okay I’m up hyung,” Riki said as he slowly sat up.
“Finally,” Jungwon sighed, “get dressed we’re leaving in five.”
Riki reluctantly pulled himself off his bed, trying to ignore how every bone in his body ached and how hot he felt despite the cool temperature of the dorm. The dancer sluggishly put out a hoodie and black sweatpants for their practice today before grabbing his bag and phone and leaving the room to head to the building for dance practice.
“Riki! What’s going on with you today?” Jay asked the youngest impatiently.
Riki was not doing well, at all. He was sweating buckets and panting heavily as they finished three hours of dance practice, but they still had one more to go. He found it absolutely ridiculous how the members completely overlooked his condition the entire practice but the reason was pretty obvious : Sunoo.
Sunoo had admitted to not feeling so great that morning and had slept in the car on the way to the company which was telling enough that he wasn’t himself. He was also looking more and more drained despite them already having two breaks for him to rest.
“That’s the third time we’ve corrected you for the same thing! You know this dance Riki, just get it right,” Heeseung scolded him.
Riki was hunched over with his hands on his knees and panting heavily as he looked up at Heeseung and Jay who were staring at him with expressions of disappointment and annoyance which made Riki’s heart ache.
“I’m sorry hyung, I’m just not feeling great today,” Riki told them through labored breaths.
“Come on Riki, no matter how you’re feeling, you’re better than this. Let’s do it again,” Sunghoon brushed him off.
Riki just sighed before getting back into his position as they restarted the song. He still made mistakes this time but he really couldn’t be bothered to worry about it. His migraine was absolutely killing him as the loud music and rapid movements were taking their toll on his body. He felt feverish and his body ached more with every run-through the group did of their songs.
After the song ended, they called a break.
“Riki, you screwed up the steps again,” Jungwon huffed as he came over to him, “Why can’t you get this right? We’ve been doing this choreography for so long.”
Riki was sitting with his back leaning against the mirror as he looked up at Jungwon who was staring and him disappointedly and looked ready to scold him until Heeseung’s voice caught their attention.
“Hey Sunoo-ah, how you doing?” Heeseung asked softly as he crouched down beside said boy who was breathing heavily as he sat on the floor with his cheeks flushed a rosy shade.
Sunoo just shook his head, “Not great hyung,” he huffed out, “I’m really tired.”
Jungwon turned away from Riki as all the other members gathered around Sunoo and checked him over while asking him several questions.
Riki watched as Sunghoon and Jungwon sat on either side of Sunoo and wrapped their arms around him while Jake brought over Sunoo’s bottle to give the boy a drink. Now don’t get Riki wrong, he absolutely adored his hyung and wanted to Sunoo to feel better but he couldn’t help the jealousy that welled up in his chest as he watched all the members dote on Sunoo.
Riki was also sick, he felt like absolute shit but all the members were ignoring him in favor of Sunoo, he was so over it. The group spent the entire break watching over Sunoo until Sunghoon and Jay sat him down on a chair in the practice room and Jungwon called for the group to continue practice.
Riki however felt aches in every muscle and bone in his body and couldn’t bring himself to get up off the floor and continue dancing. He really couldn’t take it.
Everyone besides Sunoo and Riki got back into their positions and the members all looked over to Riki, watching him expectantly.
Riki just shook his head, “Hyungs, I can’t practice anymore. I really can’t.”
Sunghoon’s brows furrowed, “What the hell do you mean you can’t? Sunoo’s sick, he needs to rest but what is your excuse Riki?” he asked irritatedly.
“You’ve been screwing up all practice Riki, so stop being lazy now, you need to practice and get these moves right,” Heeseung said.
Riki sighed, “I don’t feel good at all hyung, I really can’t practice anymore.”
“Oh drop that act, you pretending to be sick is not getting you out of dancing. Get your ass over here now Nishimura Riki,” Jake snapped at him.
Riki felt his heart shatter at his hyungs words. Did they really think that low of him? That Riki was lazy? That he would fake being sick just to get out of practice? Why do they believe Sunoo in a heartbeat but when Riki’s clearly not feeling great they just don’t take him seriously and treat him like shit?
“Hyung, I’m not lying,” Riki said frustratedly, “I’ve been feeling sick since this morning.”
Jungwon huffed, “Riki, seriously we have enough to worry about. Stop adding to our stress and just come do the damn practice.”
Riki recoiled at both the leader’s harsh tone and his words. Jungwon spoke like Riki was just burdening them. Riki pushed himself onto his feet and folded his arms over his chest.
“Why are you all speaking to me like this?” Riki asked frustratedly, “like I’m some kind of burden?”
“Because you are fucking being one! We just want to get through practice and you’re holding all of us back!” Jay snapped.
He felt tears trying to force their way out of his eyes at Jay’s words so just grabbed his bag and left the practice room quickly, ignoring the calls of his name from the members as he stormed out.
Riki could feel his breathing pick up as he blindly hurried down the hallway before he entered one of the idol break-rooms far away from the practice room and slumped onto the couch as he let himself cry. Riki’s heart was in his stomach but at least they finally admitted it. They saw Riki as a burden, it’s clear they just don’t care about him and don’t see him as the maknae, that’s why they started treating Sunoo like it. They didn’t want him around anymore, they didn’t want Riki as their maknae.
He was so lost in his own thoughts as he cried that he didn’t hear the door open and footsteps approaching him.
“Ni-ki? What’s going on, are you alright?”
Riki knew that voice, he lifted his head up to see none other than Soonyoung, Junhui, Minghao and Chan from Seventeen looking at him worriedly.
Chan and Soonyoung sat down on either side while Minghao and Jun sat on either side of Soonyoung and Chan respectively. They wanted to offer comfort to Riki but kept their hands to themselves, as they didn’t know if the boy would be comfortable with physical contact from them.
“Ni-ki~ah, what’s going on? You can talk to us,” Soonyoung assured him gently.
Riki just wiped his eyes with his sleeves and took in some deep breaths to try and calm himself.
“I’m sorry sunbaenims, it’s nothing. I’m sorry for disturbing you guys,” Riki apologized.
Chan stared at him, “Come on Ni-ki~ah, we know that’s not true. If it made you this upset it’s clearly not nothing. Also you can call us hyungs, we don’t mind.”
“It’s just, my hyungs…” Riki began.
The performance unit’s members’ eyebrows furrowed as they all shared a look. Ni-ki’s hyungs? Enhypen always seemed so close and despite the few times they’ve gotten to interact they saw how Riki teased and played around with his members a lot and they all gave him a lot of attention and affection in return. What had they done to upset the precious boy this much?
“My hyungs have been neglecting me I guess?” Riki said unsurely, “They just haven’t been treating me like the maknae and I know it probably sounds dumb and childish but I miss it. They’re all treating Sunoo-hyung like the maknae, even Jungwon-hyung does sometimes and he’s younger than him! I’ve noticed it for a while but they just look after him more than me.”
“Oh Ni-ki~ah, that’s not stupid at all, what happened? How have they been treating you?” Jun asked him.
“Just a few days ago, I was feeling really homesick and usually when I feel like that I go to one of my hyungs. I honestly just wanted some cuddles and reassurance so I went to Jake and Jay-hyung but they both just kind of brushed me off and told them they weren’t in the mood for skin-ship,” Riki explained.
“I wasn’t even upset that they weren’t in the mood for cuddles, but I was upset they just brushed me off. I went to the bathroom but when I came back they were both cuddling up to Sunoo and that really hurt because just a few minutes before, they pushed me away.”
“They’ve also been harsher on me at dance practice. They scold me for making mistakes but they’re all sweet about it to Sunoo and just gently correct him and show him the moves again.”
“Yesterday we all went on a radio show. First of all they all just left me to sit alone and grouped up with Jungwon and Sunoo-hyung, but I didn’t say anything, it didn’t seem like a big deal…”
The older four men just stared at Ni-ki sympathetically as he continued to speak.
“One of the hosts asked who the maknae was and almost instantly Heeseung-hyung answered Sunoo. He laughed and said it was a mistake, which it probably was but he just said it without any hesitation, he said it almost like he wanted it to be true.”
“Then everyone started going on about how I didn’t really act or look like the maknae. Jungwon-hyung brought up how Engenes think that he and Sunoo-hyung are the maknae sometimes and everyone just agreed. Jay-hyung just said he understood why because they are so adorable and they just look like maknaes. Everyone was just cooing at them and I just felt jealous and forgotten I guess.”
“Then the host asked which member everyone enjoyed doting on most and all the hyungs answered Jungwon and Sunoo. They said I don’t require a lot of attention and that those two enjoy being doted on so that’s why they do. Then Sunghoon-hyung added that they require a lot of attention which they are more than willing to give. Jake-hyung said ‘Riki’s just Riki’ and that I do just fine on my own a lot of the time.”
Riki felt more tears making their way into his eyes as he continued, “I felt so jealous then because I actually really like their attention and I like when they baby me but I’m awful at admitting it. It just feels like they forgot about that, like they don’t care about it… it feels like they don’t care about me.”
Chan gently rubbed Riki’s back as he noticed the teenager growing more upset as he spoke, he didn’t miss the warmth that was radiating from Riki but he decided not to mention anything about that for now.
“Is there anything else you wanna talk about Ni-ki?” Chan asked sweetly.
Riki nodded he’s already said so much he might as well just let it all out and deal with the consequences later.
“I- uh I haven’t been eating properly, like at all. I’ve been so stressed and anxious from the hyungs neglecting me that I just can’t bring myself to eat a lot of the time,” Riki admitted.
“Ni-ki~ah, that’s not good at all. When was the last time you ate a proper meal, do you remember?” Minghao asked in a motherly tone.
Riki shook his head, “I know it’s not good hyung, I just- I can’t. I ate just a few spoonfuls of breakfast yesterday, I didn’t eat lunch and I skipped dinner. I know it’s not healthy but it’s just hard to. I’ve been feeling so sick for weeks : dizzy spells, migraines, nausea. I threw up early this morning before practice.”
“Oh my God! Is that why you feel so warm?” Chan asked Riki worriedly as he brought his hand up to the boy’s forehead before recoiling it only a few seconds later.
“Wait you have a fever?” Soonyoung asked concernedly as he also felt the boy’s forehead with his palm before whisking it away similarly to his dongsaeng.
“I feel sick, really sick,” Riki said honestly, “in practice just now I was screwing up because my head’s pounding and my body aches so bad. But Sunoo-hyung isn’t feeling good either so everyone just focused on him, I know I look like shit and I definitely don’t feel good. I don’t know how none of them noticed,” Riki huffed as he felt his migraine hurt more due to his crying.
“I told them I didn’t feel well but they just brushed me off and told me to just do the practice. Sunoo-hyung said he was feeling sick and they all rushed over to him to make sure he was okay. They let him sit out for practice but they were expecting me to get up and join them but I told them I couldn’t. They just told me to stop faking and to get on with the practice and to stop being lazy,” Riki’s head pounded more with every word he spoke as he got more worked up telling his seniors about the incident that just occurred.
“Jungwon-hyung told me to stop stressing them out because they have enough to worry about and get on with practice. I got really upset so I asked them why they were talking to me like I was just a burden,” Riki felt the tears slip down his cheeks again which certainly wasn’t good as a pang of pain went through his head but he continued.
“T-then,” Riki stuttered.
“Shh, it’s okay darling. Take your time,” Jun soothed him.
“Jay just yelled at me a-and he told me I-I a-am a b-burden,” Riki stuttered out feeling himself shed more tears.
Seventeen’s performance unit looked at each other in disbelief. How could they say that? And to their own maknae no less? The two felt anger bubble in them at the behaviour of their juniors and really wanted to give them a piece of their minds for hurting the sweet boy between them. However Riki clearly needed some comfort as the boy has been through a lot, so that’s what they would provide.
Chan and Soonyoung wrapped their arms around Riki’s shoulders and the Seventeen members stayed quiet as they just let Riki let out all these feelings he’s clearly been holding in for a while.
After what was over an hour Riki finally calmed down enough and looked up to the concerned faces of his seniors. Riki genuinely looked far more drained by now and his face was tinged red from both the crying and from the fever the boy had.
The performance unit sat weighing their options on what to do in this situation for a while before deciding it would be best to go and have a talk with Enhypen themselves so the group knew the damage they did to their maknae.
“Ni-ki?” Jun piped up, catching the boy’s attention.
“We’d like to come with you to talk to your hyungs, I don’t think you should have to talk to them about this alone,” the older finished.
Soonyoung hummed in agreement, “Yeah, you’re our dongsaeng and we hate to see you so upset. We’re your hyungs too Riki and we want to help you.”
“What do you say Ni-ki? Will you let us?” Minghao smiled at him gently.
Riki nodded, he didn’t want to deal with this alone anymore.
The performance unit all stood up off the couch but as Riki followed suit, a dizzy spell washed over him and the boy went falling forward as black dots clouded his vision.
“Woah Ni-ki~ah, easy! Take it easy darling,” Minghao said as he caught the boy and leaned Riki against his chest.
“Sorry hyung,” Riki mumbled, “I’m just really dizzy.”
Chan frowned as he carded a hand through Riki’s hair, “Let’s get you back to your dorm then buddy, you need rest.”
Riki just nodded and Minghao swung him up into a bridal carry. As the group of five made their way out of the company, despite not walking on his own the maknae still felt dizzy. He leaned his head on Minghao’s shoulder and within seconds he was out.
The performance unit had first went to Enhypen’s practice room to check if they were there, but as they suspected the group seemed to have left already. Soonyoung drove them over to the group’s dorm with a unconscious Riki resting on Minghao and Chan’s laps in the back seat.
When they arrived to the dorm of their junior group, the Enhypen maknae was still passed out in Minghao’s arms. Jun was honestly impressed, the kid slept like the dead but he was also exhausted and sick so his body probably didn’t have it in it to wake up at being carried and moved around.
Jun knocked on the door of the dorm and the group waited until not even a minute later the oldest two members came to the front door.
“Seventeen hyungs?” Heeseung asked confused as he stared at Soonyoung and Jun who were right in front of him.
“Not to be disrespectful or anything hyungs but what are you guys doing here?” Jay asked.
Soonyoung and Jun huffed, they sounded rather innocent and confused considering they left an entire member at the company, as much patience as they had for the juniors, Ni-ki was an absolutely precious child and call them whipped, but they would defend him from anyone who hurt him, even if they were his own members.
“Oh you know I thought you guys were missing something. I don’t what but I think it’s a whole member!” Soonyoung snapped at the younger two.
Jun moved to the side slightly to reveal Chan and Minghao behind him, the latter holding an unconscious Riki in a bridal carry.
“Hyungs, we can explain,” Heeseung began.
“Save it! Get everyone’s ass in the living room now, we have a lot to talk to you about,” Chan told the juniors.
Jay and Heeseung nodded before moving further into the dorm to let the Seventeen members in. As they entered the living room, most of the members were already there but the oldest two quickly rejoined the group with Jungwon in tow.
“Oh Seventeen hyungs, hello,” Jake greeted as he and the others bowed.
“Hello boys,” Jun said curtly.
“Oh shit Riki!” Jake exclaimed when he spotted the youngest in Minghao’s arms, “Is he okay?” the Australian asked worriedly.
The members were all looking at Riki with gazes that seemed to be a mix of concern and some guilt.
“No, Jake-ssi,” Jun said before looking at all the members, “Ni-ki~ah’s not okay at all and if any of you bothered to look out for him then you’d know that.”
“What is Ni-ki to you?” Minghao asked rhetorically before continuing, “He’s your youngest, your maknae. So would all of you like to explain why you haven’t been treating him like it?”
Minghao’s voice was soft, almost gentle but you could hear the irritation and venom laced into it, he just sounded disappointed and that made the Enhypen members fill with guilt.
Soonyoung was about to speak but a groan cut him off. The group all turned their attention to Riki who was the one who made that noise as the boy shifted on Minghao’s lap. The older rubbed Riki’s back gently before the boy let out another groan and opened his eyes slightly.
“Hey Ni-ki~ah, how’re you feeling? Any better?” Minghao asked him kindly.
Riki just shook his head in response before slowly sitting up before he looked around and realized they were no longer at the company but at the group’s dorm. The maknae turned his head to where his members were sitting on the sofa and his face fell as he looked at them. The members all felt awful for knowing they had upset Riki, as the youngest’s look towards them was missing the usual affection and admiration he had for his hyungs, it was just a cold stare.
“Hey Riki-ah,” Sunghoon waved sheepishly.
Riki just stayed quiet and looked over at his Seventeen hyungs and Soonyoung gave him a gentle smile before continuing.
“We found Ni-ki in a break room at the company. He was very distressed so we asked him what was going on. He explained how all of you have been neglecting and ignoring him and treating Sunoo and Jungwon like the maknaes more than him,” Soonyoung explained.
The members all looked guilty as they exchanged looks before staring at Riki who was just staring at his hands in his lap.
“We- we’ve been doing that? Riki-ah, we’re sorry we didn’t notice,” Heeseung apologized.
“How could you not notice?” Riki snapped making the room fall silent.
“You’ve all been doing it for weeks! For more than a month! You- you all just started treating Sunoo and Jungwon like the maknaes and cast me aside like I was fucking dispensable!” Riki ranted.
“It’s like you all just chose to ignore me in favor of them. You’d scold me harshly for messing up in dance practice but you’d be soft and gentle with Sunoo-hyung.”
“A few days ago I was feeling so homesick, I just wanted some cuddles and reassurance from Jay and Jake-hyung. You both rejected me… I wasn’t even upset that you didn’t want to cuddle, I know not everybody likes physical affection all the time. But what upset me more was how you both just brushed me off. You completely ignored me and didn’t even ask about my feelings. Then I leave and I see you both cuddled up with Sunoo-hyung! So what am I supposed to think other than you care about him more than me?” Riki stated.
“Riki-” Jake began.
“Shut up hyung!” Riki snapped, ignoring how rude he sounded but he was sick and irritable. He was just so fed up of how he’s been treated these past several weeks.
“At the radio show yesterday all of you left me to sit alone. I don’t give a shit if it sounds immature but that hurt. None of you even made a move to try and sit with me and just flocked to Sunoo and Jungwon. Then no one talked to me the entire show besides the hosts,” Riki went on.
“And Heeseung-hyung they asked who the maknae was you almost immediately answered Sunoo, like you just forgot about me. And don’t get me started on that whole doting question. I’m independent and I don’t need a lot of attention? Also Jake-hyung, ‘Riki’s just Riki and he does fine on his own most of the time’?” Riki said incredulously.
“Did you all just forget about me? That I do like attention? That I enjoy being doted on? For fuck’s sake I know I thrive on attention, I know I don’t admit it like Sunoo and Jungwon but I enjoy being doted on! Why’d you all forget that? When did you forget that?” Riki said growing more upset the more he went on.
“No one even called me for dinner? None of you noticed how I haven’t been eating because this entire thing has made me so stressed and anxious. None of you noticed because it’s like you just forgot about caring for me.”
The Enhypen members all looked absolutely ashamed. Riki was right, they had all neglected him for so long. He was their maknae and they didn’t treat him like it.
Chan and Minghao were rubbing Riki’s back gently and whispering soothing words to him in an attempt to calm him down as the young boy was really worked up.
“You all screwed up badly. What you all told him today was completely unacceptable,” Soonyoung said, “Riki’s sick and so is Sunoo but you all flocked to Sunoo in a heartbeat but when Riki told you he didn’t feel well you all brushed him off and treated him like he was lying.”
“Why’d you all treat me like that?” Riki sniffled, “L-like I’m a burden.”
“Riki… I’m so sorry, I shouldn’t have said that. There’s no excuse but I’m sorry. You’re not a burden sweetheart and you will never be. And I’m really sorry about not being there for you when you were feeling homesick,” Jay apologized.
“We’re so sorry Riki-ah, we were all wrong and we shouldn’t have treated you like this and I’m so sorry I said you were lazy in practice earlier because it’s not the truth. I should’ve listened to you, I should’ve done better as your eldest hyung,” Heeseung said.
“I’m really sorry that I ignored you and that I accused you of lying today,” Sunghoon apologized, “you have no reason to lie to us about being sick and I should’ve listened.”
Jake sighed, “I’m sorry too Riki-ah. I fucked up, we all fucked up and about the other night with Sunoo, that was awful of Jay and I. I’m really sorry that I pushed you away and that we cuddled with Sunoo after completely brushing you off, that wasn’t fair of us at all.”
“I’m sorry too Riki-ah,” Sunoo said softly, “I should’ve noticed and paid attention to you. I just got caught up in all the attention and doting and I enjoyed it so much that I didn’t care or notice that I was taking that away from you. I’m just as at fault as everyone else. Also about the cuddling they told me no but I just did aegyo and weaseled in between them and they gave up on getting me out. That was really unfair to you, I’m sorry.”
“And of course I’m sorry as well Riki-ah. As your leader and your youngest hyung I should’ve noticed as well. I’m really sorry that we all neglected you. I also got caught up in the attention from the hyungs like Sunoo-hyungie but it isn’t any excuse. We shouldn’t have neglected you. We were all wrong and we didn’t treat you like we should,” Jungwon told him.
Riki stayed quiet for a few moments, absorbing all the members’ words of apology. They were all so sincere and they clearly felt a lot of remorse for what they did to Riki, however there was one thing that was plaguing him. Something that has plagued him for a while.
“Do you guys see me as the maknae?” Riki asked.
“What do you mean?” Heeseung asked gently.
“Like do you guys actually know and remember I’m the maknae? Engenes say it all the time, that I’m not ‘maknae’ enough. I’m too tall, my face is too mature, I don’t act like the youngest, I’m not cute like Jungwonie and Sunoo-hyung. Am I a bad maknae? Is that why you guys treated Sunoo and Jungwon like they are?”
The members all froze, it was true, they forgot that Riki was the maknae sometimes because his looks and personality made him seem older, but that wasn’t the case. Riki was still 16, he was underage, a teenager, a child who despite his maturity and accomplishments was still so young. How could they forget that? Why did they forget that?
Sunghoon gasped in realization, “What I said at the radio show… that you’re not like a maknae, I’m so sorry Riki. I shouldn’t have said that because it’s not true, you don’t have to act or look a certain way to be a maknae.”
“You’re the maknae, Riki-ah all of what you said doesn’t change that, none of that matters. You’re our maknae,” Jake added.
Riki felt himself fill with warmth at the words of his hyungs, it felt really good to be called the maknae. He may be bad at admitting that he enjoyed being doted on and loved attention, but he did. He loved being the maknae because he had hyungs who took such good care of him and always made him feel loved.
“Jungwonie and I are sorry that we kind of replaced you as the maknae for a while,” Sunoo admitted, “I guess it’s because I’m the maknae in my own family and even back in I-LAND I sort of hoped I’d be the maknae of the group. I know that’s not fair of me but when the hyungs started giving me more attention and doting on me more I just got caught up in it even though I’m not the maknae. I have to be okay with that, I am okay with that, because you’re the best maknae we could’ve gotten Riki-ah,” Sunoo told him.
“We all screwed up, badly and we don’t expect you to forgive us right away at all. But we want to make it up to you Riki-ah. Will you let us?” Jungwon asked as he stared at Riki expectantly.
Riki looked at his Seventeen hyungs who all offered him gentle smiles. Chan gave him a small nod as he pat his knee and Riki gave them a small smile in return before standing up off Minghao’s lap and jumping onto Jungwon’s lap as he extended his arms out for hugs from his members. His hyungs were on him on an instant squeezing Riki in their embraces and whispering apologies to him repeatedly.
The Seventeen performance unit all smiled at their juniors, they did need a wake up call but they seemed to be alright. The quartet stood up, catching the attention of the junior group who all turned to them.
“We’ll be going now guys,” Soonyoung said as he came over and ruffled Riki’s hair a little before stepping back. Minghao, Jun and Chan all followed suit and patted the maknae’s back to tell him goodbye but before they left Jun turned back to the group.
“Make sure Riki-ah gets better!” he told them, “Take good care of him or I’ll steal him from you and do it myself.”
The Enhypen hyungs all nodded as their seniors waved them goodbye and left their dorm.
The events of the day had taken their toll on Riki and the sick feeling in his body returned with a vengeance as he slumped against Jungwon’s chest. The members all noticed Riki’s condition and started tending to him.
“Hey baby, how you feeling?” Jake asked from Riki’s side as he placed a hand to the boy’s forehead.
“Tired and sick,” Riki mumbled.
“I’m gonna go make you some soup, you need to eat,” Jay said.
Riki grumbled in disagreement, he didn’t really feel like eating at the moment.
“No protesting sweetheart, you haven’t eaten properly in weeks and you need to get better. You’re going to eat, you don’t have to have all of it but you need to eat something,” Jay told Riki gently.
“Fine,” Riki mumbled sleepily as he cuddled up to Jungwon more.
“Aish, you big baby,” Sunoo teased him.
Riki huffed, “I’m not a baby.”
“Yeah you are, you’re our baby, our maknae,” Sunghoon said sincerely as he ruffled Riki’s hair.
Riki smiled drowsily at his hyungs, he might not forgive them entirely yet, but he will. Enhypen are his hyungs and he adores every single one of them and he’s their maknae. He didn’t have to act or look a certain way. He didn’t have to be conventionally cute as his members found him cute in his own way. He was the maknae, nothing would change that.