Chapter 1: Chapter One: One "scary" Devil
Chapter Text
Hell is boring some might say. Of late the things they had been coming out about me is silly. Me losing my touch oh please. I'm the Devil I'd never lose my touch. Then again hell has been pretty boring of late. Not only that none seems to be coming to the casino anymore. I wonder why,I just wanted to play a game.
Back to my day. There must be something that could make my job easier. Right, ugh It defiantly is just lacking. I can do whatever I want. Hmm that gives me an Idea! Oh this is going to be easy I'll just find a henchman that way I get help with collecting souls Unlike, my little henchman who is on vacation. Like a right hand man or something. That would defiantly make for some less boring soul collecting.
The question really falls on who. It is very likely Sticker would have a list of everyone on Inkwell isles. Well it's worth a shot for something. It would at least give me a starting point.
Speaking of Stickler. "Excuse me! Sir I've noticed that , we haven't gained any soul contracts in a while. "
"Yes I'm aware Stickler. I'm working on it. I believe we just need a little help here in hell. And rather more accurately the casino."
"Hmm and how do you intend to solve this sir?"
"Sticker is it possible to bring me a list? I need the names of everyone on Inkwell isles."
"It might be sir I'll see what I can do. I can't promise anything sir. You might just have to find them on your own. I'll be back sir "
"Perfect Stickler I hope to see results."
I watched Stickler walk away while taking about something. He probably didn't agree entirely with my plan. However it didn't matter.
Well I should be at least sitting in my casino. Besides I left my nail file there. I want to use it again. My nails aren't as pointy as I like them.
It's nice, that I don't have to go that far in the morning to even get to the elevator. That takes me straight there. You can set it to go anywhere. So it really doesn't matter all that much. In the same way it makes it pretty easy for me to travel. Rather than teleportation all the time.
That annoying elevator music had to play. It annoys me. Not as much as some things do. The elevator dinged to let me know I'd reached my destination.
I stepped out of it into my casino. I must have forgotten to clean it earlier, It was an absolute tip. There was still cards on the floor and a few glasses on the bar. I'll sort it later. Right now I need to find that nail file.
Last time I saw it was on my chair. I do hope none moved it. They most likely won't have. Ahaha I found it. It was still were I left it. Picked it up and sat back on my chair. Then I began filing my nails.
"Excuse me Sir!" Sticker had managed to startle me slightly. I would let it show.
"... Yes Stickler?"
"Sir I got the list you wanted. I even highlighted some souls that might be useful. Ummm sir are you aware this place is a mess?"
"No Sticker I didn't notice. I suddenly became blind. "
"You are sir?"
"No Sticker. I noticed I just choose not to do anything about it right now. "
"Oh right. Well you better start getting more souls soon "
"I will oh and Stickler get someone to tidy this place."
"no sir it is your job to keep this place looking nice clean it."
"Ugh fine , I will eventually. "
"Good sir I'll be back later." Well my nails are perfectly pointy. Ugh I guess I'll clean this place up then its henchman hunting time. I don't like doing this. I'll start with the cards on the floor. shame that looked a good hand. I could have won with that.
I'll just put them back on the table. In the pack they were originally in as for the glasses they can wait. I've got souls and a henchman to find. I'm the Devil, I've never worked a "normal" day in my life. I do what I want when I want.
So fourth thats exactly what I'm going to do. Okay lets see hmm a train really. Why a train whats that going to do? What haunt me to death? It's a train with ghosts oh well its worth a try. I think. Ghosts could be useful though they could get peoples souls oh so easily. By sneaking up on them thats seems good to me.
I'll just take that old elevator is probably a better Idea than teleporting . That way I can leave if things go badly. Well a lot easier than normal. I got in it and told it where exactly where it should go. I got out of I and stated my presence. "Oh its been a while inkwell isles! Did you miss me- Oh fuck. "
No no no, I will not be hit by a train today just no. I just ran off the track. I got off just as the "Phantom express" went by . ugh elevators don't know how to work sometimes huh. I'll have to get that sorted. Thank goodness it went back to hell in time. Oh no maybe Sticker is going to turn up.
On another note. At least I can follow them. I am the Devil I have my own power. It's just been awhile. Let's just hope I'm not that rusty. Considering what I managed to do with the elevator its very likely. I really am not losing my touch I'll just get it back. Easy like taking candy from a baby.
I followed the train. I had to. I needed to talk to them. I remembered how I could just sort of float that way they can't hit me. "Hello can I speak you guys?"
"... You're the Devil! Are you really thinking about dying today?"
"Well isn't that a way to talk to me. No No I wanted to ask you something." This won't get anywhere will it. It's not like anyone would normally listen to me without convincing a little bit. Hmm I suppose I little brawl wouldn't hurt anyone that. I mean it's not like we keep our sustained damage. Well not for that long.
"I'm not talking to the Devil about anything. "
"Your talking right now. Fine would a little battle convince you to talk?"
"Why you think you can win. You'd find yourself joining our train."
"No no it's not a battle to death. I just need to determine your skills."
"Yeah a likely story."
"No I'm not telling tales. For once. Fine let's just get this over with hmm? We are not aiming to kill.Just show me your ability's. I'm looking for what you can do and nothing more."
"Yeah sure, because you are not the Devil."
"Yes and you are a ghost train your point. Ugh lets just get on with this." Thing is fighting just gets boring. Torture the constant screaming it's a lot like fights. Only they can't get away. That and you don't end up in as much danger as you normally would. Besides I'm sure me not trying that much is just going to cause me some pain. So let's just aim for knocking them out.
Great just what I wanted I have to fight train. Is this really what it's going to take for someone to work with me. What I'd do for a willing person to give up there soul to me.
Imagine that existed. I think I'd maybe like them. I'm kidding.
Throwing eyes at me really. How actually fitting. Should I be scared no it's not bad at all. I don't get scared of something like that. It's solvable so whats the point. You get hurt so what. It's a temporary thing. In the end it heals.
I zapped the eyes out the air. I cant have them hitting me. It would mess up me and my nails. This is just boring. Seriously who needs a hand cart when you can float. Sure someone would but me? Absolutely not. I must do it in style as I don't like to be that simple.
Eventually the train started to get bored. My lack of playing along maybe made it clear. I don't really think this is the one who I want working with me. It just seems boring besides how's a train going to go out and get souls. Ugh I didn't think of that earlier.
"You know what I'm bored. Have a good day."
"You're not going try and take my soul. Huh I guess the rumours are true."
"No you are just boring . Therefore not worth my time. " I float off. Honestly one not going to a henchman. As soon as I floated back to the other side of the track near where the casino is, well the elevator to it. It was a better place to summon it. Sticker was standing there. Ugh. He must have summoned it up here to find me.
"Hello sir, how's your hunt going? I wanted to ask you about collecting souls. Are going to get anymore , soon sir? "
"Yes Stickler I will in due time just bare with me. I'm trying to get help. Ugh Its like watching paint dry out there. Well the first one is. I'm really going to not have fun with this. Oh well I'm sure the rest of inkwell isles might have a few souls I can take along the way."
"I'll take it the first one wasn't to your liking."
"Yes It wasn't. "
"You need to finish sorting out the casino sir."
"Ugh fine lets just go Stickler." Of course I have to do it myself. If my other little Henchman wasn't on vacation I'd get him to do it. Besides he doesn't help with soul collection anyways. I need someone up there to help. Here and out there. Cleaning up isn't my thing well I guess it is until further notice.
Lets just hope the next soul isn't as annoying. I'll look at the list... Sally Stageplay? Oh well I guess I'll just have to use my skills on the stage. Lucky I know how to act. Not on her level but at least I can that gives me an opening.
Chapter 2: Boy can he put on a show?
Notes:
here is the notes section.
The author of this book will not be updating in a little while. I have things I need to be doing. However I hope to update as soon as possible (a few weeks at most) Also i'm trying to give some 1930's context. So just keep that in mind. Thanks -Author
Chapter Text
As soon as we got back, and I had stepped out of the elevator. Stickler had to tell what I know I must do. I was going to get around to it. " Well sir you should get on with cleaning this. I Will watch sir."
Great so now I have to clean. Well it could be worse. At least I'd like to think if could be. Oh well the sooner this is sorted the sooner I can work on my acting skills.
Who am I kidding this is most likely going to be shamed by her. Its Sally Stageplay one of Inkwell isles most popular people. Surely having her work for me would be an advantage. right? People would defiantly come just to see her. Seems like a useful business plan.
"Excuse me sir. Can you please stop zoning out at get on with cleaning." Oh I didn't notice I'd zoned out while thinking of a plan. Right I'll work on it now. Glasses of the bar . Does putting them in the sink count probably.
"There look Stickler they are In the sink not just lying around happy?"
"Yes quite sir. They still need cleaned but this is will do at least now the guests are going to be more happy with the state of the place. That isn't exactly cleaning Sir. But It will have to do I suppose."
"Great i'm off to go talk to Sally Stageplay."
"You do realise that you will never get an A list celebrity to work for you right? That is never going to happen sir." Will see about that one Stickler. Maybe I will end up with a celebrity. Who knows.
"Maybe I will."
"Sorry to burst you're bubble sir but it is very unlikely."
"Well if I happens I told you so."
"Okay Sir I suppose you can go now."
"Great I was going to go anyways." Finding Sally isn't that hard I know exactly where to start her theatre. Hmm the elevator might be a too much. Considering it has to have a certain amount of space.
Well it's settled teleportation it is. I'm sure if I just teleported in the alway near the place none would really notice anything. Then again everyone would scream it's the devil in a heart beat. That's just how the people are around here.
I at least remember how to teleport. Tap my pitchfork onto the ground. Then there I am. Right here we are near Sally Stageplay's place.
I heard a voice nearby. I hid behind the wall in the alleyway.
"You know something. Life sure Is great you know what I mean. Yeah I'm sure you do. Hehe. The ratings and the money for my show is going through the roof!"
Whatever this guy is going on about it. I sure haven't heard anything about it. What show. You sir definitely aren't Sally. prohaps he's some new star around here.
Hmm serves me right for not bothering listing to ratings around here. Oh wait that isn't my job. Then again snooping is one of them. I'll find out who he is later for now I'm following the list.
I just have to wait until he's gone and then sneak In there easy. Good thing that guy wasn't hanging around here. I got out from my spot. Looked at the building.
There must be a way to sneak in. Like an open window usually those places get hot. But no there wasn't. Walking through the front door it is.
I walked up to the front door. I heard some people screaming in the distance. What on earth for. It's not like I'm that bad. I looked over in the direction. It turns out they were screaming at some dice man. I have no idea what the fuss is about.
Nor does it concern me in the slightest.
"Hey you there do you have a ticket."
Oh great I've been spotted trying to sneak in. Uhhh hmm. How to get away with this oh right. I'm the Devil.
"Well I'm the Devil. I'll burn you alive if you don't let me in."
"Sorry don't care no ticket no entry."
"That's appalling."
The screams of those people were getting closer again prohaps that dice guy from before was nearby.
I was right he must have walked of to get something. Then walked back over.
"Hey hey hey. There what seems to be the fuss over here. I'll see you all later at the show. Bye now." The dice man was talking to what I can only really think of as his fans. They actually left him alone after he said this prohaps they thought they'd get something out of listening strange. I don't think I've ever seen people do that before. Not in a long time.
"Nothing to worry about Mr King Dice. I just stopped this one from heading in there. "
" You realise he's most likely the Devil right? "
"I know sir however rules are rules."
"Right. I'm not the one stopping the Devil from doing his work. I'm sure he just has some business in there."
"Rules are rules."
Why is this guy even helping me in the first place. I mean thanks but I think I could have handled it.
"Okay look. He's with me. That's why he didn't have a ticket. "
"Wh- " I was about to outwardly say what. However I stopped myself. I believe whatever this King Dice guy is playing at. It sure is something. Prohaps it's more just so he doesn't get in trouble. Or it's just for the good of this guard. Whatever the reason it's better I play along that way I get in.
"In that case fine go ahead. My apologies King Dice did he win a competition?
"Why yes he did. I tell them to meet me here. I Personally like to give them there tickets. You know that."
"I've been told you do. Well I'll be watching the both of you. "
I followed the dice man into the theatre. When we were not in hearing range of the guy outside. In fact of anyone really. I thought it best I follow him. That way if anyone did ask why I'm here he can cover. For whatever reason he did in the first place.
"Why did you do that I'm the Devil you said it yourself."
"Look I don't owe you a thing I know, however I don't exactly what this place blown up. I like the theatre. I had a feeling you might be tempted to blow it up. If anything you owe me a favour. After all I did get you in here."
"Trying to get a deal without signing your soul away? "
"Not exactly. Why is that an option?"
"Well you did help me. I suppose it is. None has ever bothered to do that. "
"Great well how about we don't make a deal. Look Mr Devil. If you really want to know why I helped . I just wanted you to be able to get on with taking whoever's soul you need. Or whatever you do. I'd love to see it one day. "
"I'm sure your only just saying that."
"Maybe who knows. Anyways I'll write you a note. If anyone asks you're with me. "
Well he's smart I'll give him that one. In terms of it prohaps he'd make a good henchman. I don't think he'd want that. That just seems to easy.
He seems to be taking me to some box. Well considering he seems to be some kind of star in Inkwell isles it makes sense why he'd have one.
"A box? You really are some kind of star around here?"
"Why of course I am. Ever heard of my show? I mean it's nice to finally meet someone who hasn't. Even if it is the Devil that doesn't know who I am. Well the name is King Dice. "
"Well umm nice to meet you properly." I'm not used to this. I think I could grow to like people doing things for me. without deals.
"Its nice to meet you too Devil. I'm sure no one ever said that to you. Or lived to say it. "
" No one's ever said that no. As for living to say that no they usually only come to me for a deal. They don't care enough to tell me there names." I noticed that we were now at his box and he was writing me a note. He even signed it. I guess it's so that none thinks its a fake.
"I'm not surprised. Here no one should ask you about what you are doing. Well they might but now they know you are with me."
"Well thank you King Dice." I took the letter from him. I still don't understand why exactly he is doing this. But oh well a way In here is a way in here.
"No problem. Just don't get yourself in that much trouble."
"No promises!" Well I walk off to go and get to were Sally should be. Shouldn't be too hard after all I have Dice's letter. Which hopefully should allow me to get there. I'm pretty sure he's famous enough that it won't make me get in that much trouble.
As I was walking down I saw Sally Stageplay. Maybe she was coming up here for some reason. Interesting. Or maybe it was just something she was going to use for the show. Like jumping off the rails. To a hanging wire. That wouldn't surprise me. This is Sally we are talking about here.
"Hello miss Stageplay."
"No time to talk right now. I'm assuming you're some kind of special guest. Or did you just break in? "
"No I'm with King Dice." The fact that I have to make this excuse. Really ugh this is probably not going to work.
"Get back to your seat and enjoy the show then. Wait until after the show."
Well I don't want to become suspisous. Fine It wouldn't hurt to watch. I suppose it might be fun besides I can probably catch her later. Sally you will work for me . I'm going to get this. It has to work right. Then again its possible Stickler could be right. I just walked back to where King Dice is sitting good thing it wasn't that far away. Ironically Sally was also this way.
Oh I didn't notice that one of the backstage areas was near here. Thats a noteworthy thing. I watched Sally walk over there. I guess thats where she's going to. Rather than the balcony. Not that her using this as a prop wouldn't be too far out. Pepole say she's done it before.
King Dice noticed me walking back over here. "Oh your back. Did you get the person you wanted?"
"Nooo I'm working on that."
"What is it Sally? I'm going assum' it its. Just talk to her after the show. It's an unwritten thing of show business, we like to do our shows then we are happy to talk to pepole. Its like not being able to do your favourite thing ever again. You get sad."
"Hmm I suppose. I don't entirely get what you are referring to."
"Well I don't think you would get it all that much. I'm assumin' though she told you to wait."
"Unfortunately. Yes. Not that I don't like theatre."
"You really want to cause some kind of chaos. You always just watch or come back later it's up to you."
I get why he's even bothering to ask about what I'm doing. It's strange, and I don't get it. I don't understand it. Why is it bothering me that I don't get it. It shouldn't bother me. Ugh oh well. I guess I'm watching the theatre with King Dice. I should find out what his show is.
This might end up being boring. Why does he like chaos? Does he want to cause to cause it. Thats very unlikely. But if he does then that puts him right on my list. I'll just add him at the end at some point.
"Well Its not like I have much better to do besides theatre is something I understand."
"Surprisin' no offence. Now are you going to stand or sit down it's going to start soon?"
"Oh right I guess so. After that it's convincing Sally."
"Well I'm sure you will have fun with that."
"I most likely will." I just sit down on the chair next to him. For first time someone other than Henchman. Who is my henchman but doesn't collect souls as such. Has even remotely been nice to me. I'm almost sure that he's just doing it for his own entertainment. Stickler is probably wondering where i've ran off to. He can follow me if he really wanted to. I wonder if Henchman is back from holiday yet? Well thats something for a later me to understand.
At least I get to watch a free show. Ah there we go. "Lady's And Gentlemen welcome to the show. Please sit back and relax. Enjoy the show."
This should be an enjoyable couple hours. I never hated theatre. I just don't get time to go. So I make my own. Thats quite a fun thing for me while i'm bored in hell. Finally the most of the day is spent without Stickler. It's actually kind of strange that he's not around.
Time passed pretty quickly. I'm surprised it did. it usually drags while I wait around.In fact why did I even do that at all. I'm the Devil I could have just annoyed her but, no I didn't. I guess I wanted to listen to King Dice. By listening to him about the fact that artists should be aloud to do there passion. Never again will I be doing that.
"Well there you go Devil you can go talk to her without any worries anymore. "
"That I will and thanks for helping me in. " Finally I can talk to Sally and not have anymore distractions. Or things getting in my way just perfect.
Right now hopefully she should come out of that room at the bottom of the hallway. That's exactly what happened.
"You again. Out with it you want my autograph or something?" She was also followed by the doorman from earlier.
"No actually I was wondering if you would work with me."
"Hmm let me think about it. No not in a million years. Now the show is over Mr Devil I suggest you leave."
"Just consider it. I could make this place even grander."
"Hmm tempting but no. Ehm sir can you please make sure that The Devil leaves thank you."
"I'm on it. I hope you enjoyed the show. And goodbye."
I can't believe this. Me taken out of the theatre I could have walked myself out. To make matters worse it was dark and Stickler was standing there.
"Yes Stickler I know souls to be collected don't you have better things to do."
"Actually no sir. I also wanted say told you so. It's impressive you even made it in the first place. Now we have the weekly report meeting to start. Henchman has came back from his holiday too."
"Oh goody." Free nap time for me.
"Well we better get back to hell."
"Your right. And Stickler for the record this day didn't happen."
"Hmm understood sir." We both stepped into the elevator and it descended back into hell.
I might hate those weekly reports but doesn't mean I can't have a nice nap too. Maybe even that I could dream about something better than that.
Well the sooner I get this over with the sooner I can get back to doing something fun. This elevator always seems slower with Stickler around
Chapter 3: Why are we at the Ocean again?
Notes:
(I might not have too much time to write this however I am working on trying to set more time to my animation and my books anyways enjoy.)
Chapter Text
After what seemed like hours. I finally got out of the elevator. I was greeted by a purple demon. That had previously, been on holiday.
"Boss it's so good to see you again."
"Yes yes, it's good to see you too."
"Hmmm let's just get on with our meeting. We can play mothers meeting catch-up later." Ugh I hoped he'd forget about that. Fuckkk I hate his meetings.
It's just an excuse for me to nap. But why couldn't they be interesting I don't know get that guy I met earlier to do it. Wait why has he even crossed my mind. It's irrelevant. I think everyone in hell gets my point anything would be better than Stickler.
He's boring. Souls oh I don't know maybe more souls ! I know Stickler. How about we talk about something interesting, or I don't know at least try to make it sound interesting! Like maybe a new brand of shampoo that came out. I'm really grasping for straws here. Still point stands.
"Everyone follow me to the meeting room." Well if I don't follow him he'd get mad at us all for not listening. Not that I will be anyways. Who actually listens to Stickler seriously. None that's the answer.
Henchman also followed us. This is going to suck. The entire meeting is going to feel like watching paint dry. Even that would be more interesting. I sat down knowing fine well in a few seconds I'd be asleep.
"Right let's start the meeting." I'm already bored he's only said 5 words. Ugh.
"So as everyone in hell is aware, there has been a lack of soul collecting, all the souls have been going down in numbers-" I didn't hear any more of it I'd fallen asleep.
I'd fallen into a dream. I was burning people alive. Hmm this is nice. Oh they're screams were better.
Why is that Dice dude in my dream. Am I trying to tell myself I should get him to work for me? Not that it wouldn't be a good idea. I said he was on the list. What more do you want from me .. me. Wait no someone was waking me up.
"Ugh..."
"Boss..." I head Henchman say my name quietly. Stickler was staring at me. What did I do.
"What?"
"You fell asleep. Who's this Dice guy. I'll also have to repeat myself." Great even Stickler noticed I was asleep
Oh I must have said something. Shit. Ummm well. There's only one thing to do lie my way out of this one.
"Dice guy? What on earth are you taking about. Theres no such thing. "
"Uhh Hey Boss? Did you meet King Dice? He's a Dice guy"
"No who even is this King Dice?"
"Umm I'll tell you later boss. I guess you just had a dream about being the king of the dice. Which in some ways you are boss."
"That's enough talking. Back to the meeting." Well back to napping more like.
"Ughhhhhh " everyone including myself groaned at the prospect of Sticker taking for even longer.
"Sticker I get it we need to collect souls. That's what this meeting is for right."
"Yes sir it's about the lack of it."
"Stickler I'm working on it none wants to hear a 4 hour lecture on it. End of meeting come along Henchman. I have something I want to tell you about."
"You got it boss."
"Sirrr you have to listen to the meeting."
"I've heard enough no thank you Stickler." With that I stood up and began walking out.
"But this is important. Sir."
"What was that. Doesn't matter. I have more important things to do ." I walked to the hell elevator with Henchman following me. I didn't even care to look back at Stickler.
"So boss what was it you wanted to talk about."
"You know that King Dice guy you mentioned. Yes I did meet him but don't go telling Stickler that. Follow me Henchman, I think it would do us well to go on a walk for a while. " I stepped onto the elevator. Henchman followed.
"You met King Dice boss what was he like? Were are we even going boss?"
" He was nice. To me what's even the deal with that. How is he even famous? Also to answer that I don't know the ocean I don't care anywhere but here."
"You got it boss. Oh he has his own show called Roll The Dice. I'm a big fan of his boss." Henchman sorted out the elevator this time. Well at least it won't be off the location for once.
"Roll The Dice ... Ironic name."
"What did King Dice even say to you boss that was so nice. Ohhhh I really wish I could have met him too boss. I'm such a big fan of his." He seemed to be smiling about the fact I'd met King Dice. I don't get it what even is the fuss about.
"Umm a few things. Mainly about show business."
"That's so awesome boss! Getting tips from King Dice is something I've never heard about. Did you get his autograph?"
"Henchman considering I didn't know he was famous in the first place. Until later. I mean I sort of have it he wrote me a letter. "
"Wow can I see it."
"I really don't see what the big deal is. But if it means that much to you." I handed him the letter. His face lit up even more and kept smiling. He must have not been able to help it. I mean if he likes the guy. Suppose I can understand being starstruck.
The elevator dinged to tell us we were at our location. I did wonder were exactly we were. I stepped out the elevator and fell straight into the ocean.
"Whoops sorry boss. It must need recalibrated again."
"You think ? Henchman. No I never noticed. "
"Yeah I'll sort that later for you boss." The one thing is I hate water. When it isn't of my own choice. I end up looking fluffy which Is not something I really want to do outside. I usually have time to sort it but oh well. I just got out of the ocean, then when onto the nearby beach.
While henchmen flew down to the beach. He really did just take us to the ocean.
"Here's the plan Henchman we are going to go find this Captain Brineybeard. Apparently he's usually near Cala Maria. "
"You got it boss. Isn't he a pirate boss?"
"Yes that he is."
"I've never met a pirate before boss." I've never really bothered to go down. Either so I haven't met him either. Thank goodness its not a cold day. Ugh still I'm soaked either way.
Now if I do shake myself dry I'll look very fluffy. Which is something that I don't want to do. However I dislike being cold. Oh well I'm going to do it anyways.
I just shake myself off as usual, after doing this. I now look like a fluffy mess.
"Not a word henchman. First I'm sorting this mess out then it's off to go find him."
I tapped my pitchfork onto the ground. Causing the usual poof of magic. Lucky most of my magic is tied up with this. Although in the rare chance I lose it then well let's just say that never needs to happen. I'd end up being pretty much powerless.
"Uhh can we go find the pirate now boss ?"
"Of course we can follow me too the docks."
" You got it boss." Thing is I had no idea what I was entirely
looking for. At least now until I run into a problem. At least for the moment it at least looks like I know what I'm doing. That is better than not looking like I don't know how to do anything at all.
I walked along ahead trying very hard not to look like I an not just wandering hoping that someone might say his name so that I can find him. No thats defiantly not what I am doing.
"So where is he boss."
"Uhh over there." I pointed to a red ship hoping I was right. I had a funny feeling I was.
"Well let's climb on the ship then boss."
"Well you go first Henchman." I haven't really been the biggest fan of ships. I never have. I'd much rather teleport than travel on one of those things. I had never really had been a fan of boats. Theres just something about I floating on water that I just don't like that much. It seems an awfully odd process to me.
Oh well as long as I'm not stuck on a boat for days I'll be fine. I watched as Henchman got onto the boat. I waited for a little bit before going onto the boat myself.
It looks even more stupid than I thought. What's with the floor of this boat it looks like you're going to get loads of splinters.
"Oh Hi boss would you look at this boat doesn't it look so cool! Oh will we get to see a pirate."
"I should think so. It is a pirate ship. I'd be conserned if there wasn't."
"Ughh boss who's that." Speaking of pirates. There we saw one just waking up out. Of his cabin walked out yawned and then looked at me. Looked away and looked at me again.
"Blimey! I do be losing it these days. The Devil so you have come for me soul eh."
That wasn't exactly the reaction I expected. All wanted was a henchman. To help out with souls a little more. Not whatever this is. Well I mean at least he isn't running.
"Actually no boss is looking for another henchman. To help him out right boss?"
"Well if that be so how about we go on an adventure and talk about it . I have me dear sweet Cala Maria to see."
If you do that I'm stuck on a boat. Quite frankly I'd rather stay on land however this does allow me to obverse what he does. Not only that I get to see Cala Maria too. That's not really a bad deal.
"Fine just no funny business."
"Well of we go then." I watched as he unanchored the ship and put out the sails. Oh I'd be in for it now. I haven't been on a ship before, not that I wanted to floating on water is just an odd topic. For some very strange reason I feel sick.
"Yay we get to go on adventure boss! Oh this is going to be fun!"
"Yes fun." I was lying. I knew from how I felt just a moment ago I was going to hate it. I couldn't imagine being stuck on a ship for days oh it would be terrible.
While Brineybeard was at the steering wheel of the ship. Henchman had noticed my staring out at the vast water. I wanted to distract myself with something. Not that it was working all that well.
"Ughh boss are you feeling alright?"
"Henchman I don't think I like traveling by boat."
"Your sea sick boss ?"
He had to mention sick. Now I feel worse. It wasn't the intention I know that. I'm not stupid.
"Maybe a little bit. Could you not mention the word . Look I don't know just talk about something else Henchman."
"Umm how about we talk more about King Dice."
Well you know what fine. If something will distract me then please. Anything is better than this.
"What about him."
"Boss I don't mean to sound strange but is it possible you like him."
"No no chance. At all. I just think he's a pretty charming guy. Seriously I get why he has a show now. As Ironic as the name is."
Despite what I outwardly say. I do like him. I just don't want to go asking him to work for me. I mean what are the chances I even see him again. Besides he's the first person on this isle who doesn't instantly think. Oh he'll take my soul or oh my he's going to kill me run.
He helped me despite knowing exactly who I am. But also he wanted me to be able to get on with what I was doing that's what I like about him. I mean he is sort of charming.
"Boss I uhhh don't mean to be rude but you never call anyone charming and your sort of wagging your tail a little bit. You sure you don't like him boss that's strange. "
I must my tail must have been moving a little bit. Like a happy puppy. Shit or maybe it's just the prospect of someone helping.
"I'm very sure Henchman. Look if I did like him. I think you are getting the wrong idea here. Honestly if I wasn't the devil I'd probably be calling the police."
"Boss that's not funny."
"It kind of is. Considering it's against the law. If in theory I did."
"You've never cared about laws anyways boss."
"Exactly why what I said is amusing to me at least in some way."
I heard a bell ringing. The pirate was making a bell ring for some strange reason. Was it to call the Cala Maria from the sea.
Unsurprisingly it was used for exactly that. I watched as Cala Maria she rose up from the sea.
She's bigger than I thought she'd be. Then again she's a sea monster. Well more she looks more like a mermaid is no one going to point that out.
"Hey Cala Maria remember me it's your boyfriend."
"Brineybeard good to see you again. Who's these you brought.. You aren't in trouble are you?"
"No nothing like that Marria."
"Henchman I've seen enough these two are not going to be of any use to us. Let's just go. They are too lovesick to care."
"Boss it's kind of sweet."
"I don't care we are leaving." It must be nice sure. I'm the devil none of this is important to me. None.
"Okay boss. How are we getting out of here exactly."
"I'll telported you back to the shore then myself hopefully Sticker isn't there. "
"Alright boss you got it. " I did just that I telported henchman and then myself back to the Shore this isn't going too well.
Sally wasn't useful neither was Brineybeard neither was Cala Maria. Or the Phantom Express, Well I guess it's moving onto Rumor...
She already hates me. This isn't going to be all that fun but oh well.
"Where to next boss. Mind it is getting dark."
"Well then back to hell then. Tomorrow I'm going to go see Rumor. I know exactly how it's going to go but it's worth a try."
" You got it boss uhh you're going to have to -" I didn't need him to finish was he was going to say I'd already telported us both back. "Nevermind you got it boss."
"Right well I'll see you tomorrow henchman."
I watched him walk of. I wasn't actually tried . So instead of going to my bed. I thought picking up a bottle of whiskey and a glass. To take up to my room might help a bit.
I thought it might let me sleep better. Sure I have no problem falling asleep when Stickler is talking . It's Stickler. However I just get a funny feeling I won't be able to sleep that much.
Well I know Rumour isn't going to be happy to talk to me that much but it wouldn't hurt to ask. What was the show that dice guy was in again...
Oh right Roll The Dice I wonder if it's on my TV it should pass the time. At least I hope so.
Chapter 4: Bees don't ever forget. Rumors keep on coming.
Chapter Text
I couldn't sleep that night. That Roll The Dice show passed time better than I thought it would. I looked at the time and it was 7am surely that counts as morning right. How is it that I didn't sleep all.
That makes no sense. What's even more annoying. I have to wait until the afternoon until more of my cigars I order come. At least in terms of that I have one somewhere. In one of the offices I use.
I have to go and get it perhaps I'll feel a little better. They always help. I haven't had one in a few days. I usually have my cigars if I feel like shit. Or I'm working on my paperwork. I hate doing it anyways. So it's an excuse not to.
Knowing Stickler he will most likely already be awake. He'd probably be surprised to see me awake. He'd also most likely pick up on my probably slight drunkess. I don't feel it. I most likely am. Considering how much of that bottle I had drank.
During the night I had thought it to be a good idea to get some more. So there's a few bottles now in my room. I'll sort it later.
I made sure before leaving my room to turn the TV off and carefully as I could opened the door. Picked up my pitchfork. Then walked out my room to go down to the casino and into my office.
Only when I got to the casino there was Stickler. Waiting.
"Excuse me. I just wanted to inform you sir about the latest soul collecting situation it must improve soon. Also why does the entire isle think you are losing your touch?"
"Geee I don't know Stickler. Is a rumor just a rumor. "
"Also sir what are you doing up so early... " He was catching on as usual. However I don't care about this.
"Stickler today I thought hey let's blow up some bees."
" Your not making any sense sir."
"I'm being sarcastic again. It doesn't matter. Not one bit. Will you I don't know leave me alone."
"Unfortunately I cannot do that you need collect souls."
"I told you i'm working on it! Now I'm going to my office getting paperwork and going to get souls. "
Some of that I lied about. Who's going to notice. Well Sticker will later however for now I'm safe from Sticklers incessant whining.
I opened the door of my office. Sat on my chair and looked through the drawers. I know I left that cigar in here somewhere. There it is. Now the question is where is the lighter.
Ugh I hate to admit it but you know what. I really could use some help. Well I'm sure it's somewhere it has to be. I can't of just lost it. I mean I suppose I could always just make a small little fire to light it.
I'll do that. It saves me tipping up this entire office. Prohaps then I'll feel just a bit less bad. I've never really felt anything like this. It's strange.
I created the small fire and lit the cigar. Afterwards I put it in my mouth. Like usual. Then I came henchman I guess Stickler must have told him I'd wandered in here.
"Uhh morning boss."
I just blankly looked at him for a moment. Taking the cigar out of my mouth and exhaling.
"good morning Henchman."
"Whats wrong boss , you're not usually up at this time." trust me henchman I more than aware. Theres also the reason of my cigar. What gave it way. Most likely both. How could I forget the fact that henchman knows me so well.
"You know Henchman I'm just well not feeling myself. Strange. I know I'm the Devil I should just be myself. Yes. " The thing is I have no idea at all why I feel like I do at the moment. If I could explain it I would have by now. But the fact is I have no idea why i'm in this state.
"I can tell boss. I have an Idea. Why don't we go on an adventure like yesterday?" Thinking about it getting out of hell might help a bit. You know he's probably right. Sitting here wont do me too much good.
"You know what fine. " I put out the cigar in my ashtray in my office. It's fine I can get another one later on. After all the shipment for them and a few things for the casino comes then. So it's not that much of an issue.
"Thats the spirt boss. Didn't you say you were going to vist Rumor today?"
"Yes I did. Let's just do that. She doesn't like me that much though." I stand up from my desk and walk out my office Henchman follow me. Out afterwards he also shuts the door to my office after him.
"I don't see why not. Boss."
"She's Rumor theres not much really to say about her. She's just infuriating to deal with. Let alone the fact that the most of police around here are bee's so she runs that . Which is a pain when you are the Devil. I mean not that she even dares to challenge me."
"Thats sort of the sprit boss."
Yes yes the spirit. Something apparently I've been lacking for a while. I would have much rather sat in my office and thought about things. However this isn't going to get anything done is it. I should really just focus on my goal and not get distracted with other things. Not just that he is right about me not being able to do much sitting around. L
"Yeah right lets just get this over with. I know how this one is going to go. It's pretty easy to tell where this one is going to go. "
"Oh don't say that boss. What if it surprises you?"
"It won't henchman. At this point its not going anywhere."
"It might if you think it will."
"Which is never going to happen. We both know Rumor is Rumor she isn't my friend. She most certainly isn't mine. Nor will she ever be."
While we were talking I hadn't noticed that I had now followed him into the hell elevator. I guess I was too distracted talking to Henchman about things to notice. It appears all I have been lately is distracted. Which still isn't like me at all. I'm out of sorts I've been thrown out of balance.
It's fine eventually everything will become balanced again.
"Boss you really still are out of sorts."
"I'm fine don't be silly."
"Well how about we talk about something you like. Oh like that time you caused some chaos you know like umm, well. " Hes drawing a blank isn't he. I get it. I haven't in a little while. I do what I want. It's just that I've grown a little bored.
"You really honestly can't remember the last time I caused any chaos."
"Uhhh nope sorry boss. I mean if you haven't noticed you are outside right now." I didn't notice again. I must have been walking around without too much thought again. This is getting anyoying.
"I noticed . " I didn't I saw some people minding there own business. Trying to have a nice lunch so just that. I do something I zapped there food turning it into a monster.
"Oh good one boss."
"It was wasn't it. Anyways Rumor right."
"Boss you realise that we are near her building right. "
"I'll handle this one. " I walked into her building. I don't really know what I was expecting. But for it to look this decorated and nice was a surprise.
"Oh umm." I heard some of the bee's voices as they realised that the literal devil had walked in. I don't get it. Now I'm thinking about yesterday great.
"H-how can we help. Do you have any crime that needs solved."
"No I want to talk to Rumor." This probably isn't going to get me anywhere.
"Unfortunately Rumor isn't seeing people at the moment she's on holiday. I can get a message to her if it's important Mr Devil. "
"Just tell her this then the Devil is looking to have a talk about her thoughts on working for me."
"... Right ill-" oh you lying bee huh. Rumor had came down to the bottom floor and just looked at me.
"Why did you let him in!"
" I didn't he came in on his own accord Rumor."
"Well Devil whatever in hell you want I want nothing to do with it. You are nothing but trouble quite frankly I want you to leave before you are arested."
"Arest me. Pfft how. I'm the Devil. Besides all I was offering is-"
"No don't care now leave."
"Fine I guess my door to help might close."
"That door that comes to hit you again more like. Now go."
I couldn't be bothered to argue with her that much. It would just get nowhere anyway. Besides I'm sure the list will work. There has to be someone whiling.
I walked back out and Henchman was waiting for me while staring over at another building for some reason.
"Henchman it didn't work. Let's just go."
"Yeah sure boss."
"Why were you looking over there?"
"That's where roll the dice is boss. "
"Oh right that makes sense I guess. Enough about Dice yes. Good now let's just have a little bit of fun before we leave."
"Uhh What did you have in mind?"
"Hmm well that would run it."
So Henchman followed me as I changed a few lights to green when it was red. Blew up a few things. Set fire to some of the community flowers in the garden. I think that was enough. For now that way they know who exactly is back.
"Are we going back now boss?"
"That we are. Hopefully we don't have to worry about hell's problems too much longer. "
"Well if we find someone I'm sure it will improve like you said boss. Uhh back to hell."
" Of course we are going back to hell. Get ready for another lecture. Most likely ughhh. Even thinking about it is boring."
"Yeah I have to agree boss."
Chapter 5: Who let the rat in?
Notes:
(sorry the chapter isn't as long as usual. Werner will be in later chapters too so don't worry about that one. Also I only know a little German so feel free to correct me if I'm wrong I'm not fluent in German.)
Chapter Text
We got back to hell as usual. I remembered I should make sure the casino is doing fine.
"Henchman I think I should go to the casino for a bit. I just feel like I need to go over there." Really the only reason why I wanted to go over there is so that I could just clear my head a bit more.
The smell of depression feeling for failure and losing in this place. Just felt a little nice sometimes. It's perfect for me as it causes chaos. When people are down they are also easier to convince to make reckless decisions. That and if they think they will win they will too.
"Okay bye boss. I'll talk to you later." With that he watched me walk of. I just walked into the casino and to my surprise there was a rat in there talking to Stickler. Oh wait hang on isn't there a rat on my list. Yes that's it Werner Werman. Prohaps they are the same rat.
"What do you mean this isn't really working. What your boss is lazy is dat it. Am I right, ja ja I must be. "
"What I'm saying is that you shouldn't be in here right now. Unfortunately today we aren't open. "
I'm pretty that is Werner Werman. That's the only thing that makes sense. The other thing is how did he even get in here.
"I would like to have one drink your boss is here. Just one ja. Then I'll be out of your casino."
"I see no problem in that get him a drink Stickler."
"Fine boss I'll do that . "
I had a plan. I could talk to this rat for a bit no problem what's so ever. Then again how exactly is this going to help. I'm starting to see around here , maybe I just have to do everything myself.
"So you are Werner Werman arn't you?"
"Ja." Well thats at least one thing I know now. I find it interesting, If remember he's good at making things. Which is handy. In terms of souls I have not a single clue how he's going to help with that. The only way i'm going to figure it out is by talking to him. I can't judge a book by its cover. Well I can and I do. Thats unimportant now.
"Oh so just here for the drink?" I can get more information great. Thats exactly what I need. Well I just have to determine if he can help.
"Ja , unfortunately this is one of the only places that sells drinks."
"That explains it. Say what do you do. Just build contraptions?"
"Thats what I do yes. I'm not going to work for you or sell my soul. Your the devil quite frankly after my drink I'll be leaving."
Great just great. I mean I saw it coming but its annoying either way.
"I brought the drink you wanted , for Wener Werman." I watch Stickler give the drink to him. I think he thought I was going to use this to my advantage to convince him to work for me. I'm not I don't need contraptions I need someone who is charming enough to get people to accidentally give away there souls.
"danke" I'm assuming what he said was thank you I'm not sure.
The idea I was thinking about before, most of that just sounds a bit like a distant dream. A memory almost of something that was so much easier it just isn't anymore.
Its highly possible maybe I have been looking for something that doesn't exist. That could be the case.
I don't need some meaningless devices, I don't need someone who's limited to there tracks. The biggest issue is popularity. They have to be trusted and respected which the only one who does. No it's just too easy. I really don't think it's that simple. There's what ten names left on this list. Or is it eleven irrelevant. Surely one of them has to be useful. Right they have to be.
I must have been pacing around for a while.
"Excuse me sir? Are you going to stop pacing. Werner Werman has left too sir. I'm getting the feeling that there might be something bothering you."
"No don't be silly Stickler I'm perfectly fine. There's completely nothing wrong. If there was Stickler I would have already sorted it."
"I really don't believe you. You're acting a bit strange even for you it's strange."
"Sticker I'm not acting strange. Your just losing it." I walked off not looking back at him.
I thought I'd just go back to my room and get some much needed sleep. That's even if I can. I most likely will be able to. I should be more me like as Stickler seems to think I'm lacking.
Chapter 6: Chapter 6: Robots? Really you aren't that cool.
Chapter Text
As soon as I had gotten to my room I just let myself fall onto my bed. Allowing myself to fall asleep not too long after doing that.
I assumed I was dreaming. They always had a little bit of different feeling to them. For some reason this just felt a bit rosy which is odd.
Then again that's mostly what dreams are. Just whatever you are currently thinking about. With the addition of whatever you want there. They are thought of whatever your mind wants. They are the current and place of there mind. So if its rosy then clearly I have some more fond thoughts about something.
I don't really remeber the dream too much. I knew it was something. But I haven't a clue why I was thinking about such a thing. I had maybe thought about something that was maybe deep down. Not that I have a clue what.
The next person I need to talk to is Doctor Kahl. Quite frankly this is probably going to hurt. Unfortunately the last time I talked to him I might have blown up what he was working on.
So what it took him a day to fix it. To me it just looked like a pile of junk. He literally owns a darn scrapyard. What was I supposed think I wasn't junk. It's misleading if you ask me.
Who does that. If it's a junk yard it's junk so I'm blowing it up for fun simple. What else was I supposed to do. I'm the Devil of course I'm going to explode things. Is fun plus it causes chaos. I'm sure that it's not that important. You could always just remake it with scrap. There's always some rubbish. It seems to be never ending around that place.
That's what those places do deal with rubbish. Eventually it's going to get destroyed anyways. Seriously who cares. Well clearly him. I don't at all. Then again If someone got rid of my pitchfork I would not be so happy. I'd do anything to get back. If that's how he sees that pile of trash. Then I guess I can see his point.
Why am I even thinking about this. Right walking to my appending failure. Ugh no it will be a failure if I keep thinking about it like that.
Why did this stupid scrapyard have to be all the way on the other side of town. Why couldn't it be closer.
While I was walking through town I heard a tune. I know that tune I guess that King Dice guy must be around here.
No no I mustn't be listening to this I have to get on with the task at hand. That should be so very simple. Get to the place ask him to work for me. Get attacked by a boring robot. Run out maybe pass out then I can move onto others on the list. Ugh it's starting to end up being more of a task than I thought.
All that matters is that I get someone to work for me. Who I can get along with. Not only that doesn't hate me but would be willing to do whatever I say. Which I'm starting to think doesn't exist. If that does maybe I'm just completely blind to it.
Of course I had to listen to him. Why couldn't I have just stayed on track. Actually no scratch that why am I walking straight towards where he's singing.
Oh right no he had to be near the outside of town. Why couldn't I just pay attention to what was going on . I just need to . No you know what scratch that I need someone to work for me. Using the list instead of braking of it is what I'm trying to do. Not this.
Of course the way to the stupid scrapyard was through a small Forestry area. I suppose it was to hide it. That and it gives the isle more places to sit at I suppose.
Which at this current point I'd stopped to look at Dice. Who was sitting outside on a bench.
He'd noticed me of course he had. He'd even struck up a conversation with me.
"Hey hey there . I didn't think you'd be an outdoor person but here you are."
"I'm really not Dice."
"Then what you doing all the way out here?"
"I could ask you the same thing."
"Well I suppose you could. If you must know I come out here for some more quiet time. "
"Well then go back to it I'm clearly interrupting it. "
"Not really . I'll be honest Devil. It's not always that quiet the only place that is, my house. Even then I'd rather spend time outside. But outside I can still hear the screamin' of my fans."
"It must be nice sometimes. My fans just scream and run away."
"Sounds nice. Honestly for once I wouldn't be followed everywhere."
"You say that yet I don't see anyone here. Other than you and me."
"Yeah that's true. I just managed to sneak away for a bit."
"Well they won't come over while I'm here that's for sure. Still I think you'll get in trouble so you know. I really shouldn't be taking to you."
"At this point. I don't think me talkin' to the Devil would stop them. Have you forgotten 3 days ago?"
"No of course I haven't."
"Well then , they still see me as an idol some people are just blinded by stars they haven't a clue what kind of things they are doing. "
" It still sounds weird."
"Funny you still never told me why you are out here."
"Well I was going to go talk to Doctor Kahl."
"Oh that guy yeah, I don't think he's in a good mood. Besides I needed some metal for some props a couple of days ago. Oh gosh was he not doing it. Somethin' about life's work being more important."
"The robot he's building. I destroyed it one time."
"That's what he's doin' huh. Wait. Why'd you do that."
"I was bored. Hang on how do I keep doing this."
"What talkin' to me like this. I don't know maybe you just like talkin' to me."
" You just have interesting things to say. Now if you will excuse me I have an appointment to get attacked by a robot."
"... I wouldn't recommend it."
"It's what my list says . So honestly it's not that bad."
"Well have fun with - ah sorry I hear my fans." I watch him run off somewhere.
Now finally I can stop being distracted and go to the scrap yard. I'm sure that really boring robot will be there.
When I got there. It was bigger than I remember. Of course he'd make a door that the robot could close. Oh yeah very cool. I'm the Devil.
How is that going to keep me out. I telport into the scrapyard.
"You out now. Before I use my robot."
Oh fantastic he's using a robot to threaten the Devil. Really honestly this is how low you have gone now.
"No look I've come to make you an offer. "
"I don't want it. Haha take this. my latest invention a Lazer Beam"
He proceeded to press a button that caused the robot to fire a lazer bean whatever that is at me. I just stepped out of the path. That was clearly hot it burned through metal.
"Really. Well now it's just sad look you even burned more metal what a waste."
"If you'd have stood there none of that would happened."
"Now why would I do that. Besides - HEY WATCH IT. Look I get it no deal great good to know. Would you quit it with that Lazer thing."
"Never. You know what prohaps my gun has a few things to say."
"... Right okay say it to no one " I tap my pitchfork and telport outside the place. Great well I knew that was going to turn out like that.
Actually it went a little better than expected. Except for maybe it being later than I'd hoped.
You know now I remembered that dream I had. Ugh really . No it's silly besides it will just go away. I'm sure of that.
Well I don't think I should try and deal with this list entirely beside. I do believe it's going to get very annoying soon. Besides why am I going to have to climb a darn mountain. No I'm leaving that for tomorrow.
I'll just telport back . I can't be bothered with the hellelevator today anyway. Besides I could do with another nap actually scratch that. I'm going to join telport to my room and sleep that way if anyone trys to find me I'm in hell. Not to say they haven't already tried that.
Ugh Stickler has probably already done that. Oh well it's a later me problem.
I just fell back asleep. I was most likely going to end up dreaming again. That was very likely.
Chapter 7: Chapter 7:Grim times no problem use a Matchstick
Notes:
( my puns for the names of each chapter might be getting a little old. You could say it's looking Grim. Anyways I like them so this joke is still going. Don't like it we have a Saltbaker for that. Oh dear. Eh who's gonna stop me to the book!)
Chapter Text
I got up. From my sleep. I haven't a clue how long I'd even been sleeping. It didn't matter.
The dreams I've been having lately they are much better than usual that's for sure. I haven't the slightest clue why. Then again it's been weird.
I couldn't sleep now I can. The rosy dreams. No it's impossible. Right today's plan.
Going to a mountain. Why couldn't the guy just live in the city. Ugh honestly. Then again I don't really recall Dragons ever living at the city.
Well let's just get this out of the way. If I go out of my room normally Stickler will probably be there. Henchman would want to talk to me. Not that I minded Henchman talking to me.
My door opened. Well what do you know thinking about things does make them appear. What is the saying again oh right. Speak of the Devil and he shall appear. I don't think it's entirely true. I don't just appear all the time like that. Then again I do just telport around a lot.
"Uhh morning boss. I haven't seen you in a while. Well umm you know what I mean. "
"Yes I know Henchman I was out trying to get someone else to work for us."
"Uhh how did it go."
"Well you know. Nowhere. That's what. Now I have to find some dragon in a mountain."
"Oh yeah isn't his name Grim Matchstick or something."
"Yes that's what his name is. Now I'll be going."
"Boss one thing he umm might run away."
"Sure he will. Well if that happens he's going off the list."
I bet that elevator is still broken. Well it might be. That and I still wish to avoid that insessant music.
So I tapped my pitchfork onto the ground. Telporting myself to the mountain.
Great. It's just rocks. Oh and my my favourite more rocks. So many stupid boring old rocks everywhere!
The only interesting thing is this happens to be a volcano. Although it's not doing anything right now. So it's boring.
Now if I'm a dragon where would I be. Oh I don't know a cave full of gold. Isn't that another one of those cliches? Is that what it's discribed as.
Right whatever looking for a cave with gold. Or just a flying lizard shouldn't be too hard.
This is too quiet. Honestly why would you live out here. I could literally hear a pin drop from a mile away.
Wait I think I found the dragon. Well that's just fantastic of course why wouldn't he live in a cave.
Walking into a dragons cave. Seriously way to go. Oh yes let me just walk in have flames thrown at me. Have it do absolutely nothing. Stand there blankly and stare.
I looked around at the cave. Trying to see if there even was a dragon here. I mean it's the only place he could be. That and Sticklers list lead me here.
Eventually I heard a voice. The way hes trying to talk was supposed to scare me . I really think he's more scared of me than I am of him.
"W-whos there. Don't move. I-i'll h-hurt you."
"Oh there you are. Great. At least I don't have to tell Stickler he's wrong."
"... W-what do you want."
"Simple Grim. I would like to offer you a deal. Hmm prohaps more courage is in order ."
"N-no i-i'm not making a deal with you. I d-don't like what you are saying. A-are you-"
" The Devil yes. Look would you like a deal or no? Shall I just leave. I don't think you'd be able to do it anyways."
"Y-yes just get out. Or i-i'll have to hurt you."
"Well you know what. That's fine . I don't think you could have done it anyways."
I wasn't really in the mood to say too much. I'm starting to think this whole plan of mine might be a little pointless.
Fantastic it's not even that late. Meaning great I can try and talk to some others.
Who's next on my list. Well you know what. A clown has got to be at least somewhat funny right.
I walked out of the cave and telported. To what I'd like to discribe as the biggest carnival in Inkwell isles. Even I like to go here sometimes for a little bit of time away from hell
Chapter 8: Chapter 8: Beep Beep Beppi coming through
Notes:
(for once I finish two chapters in a day. It probably won't happen again. I also might have to focus a lot more on work so I won't be able to update as much. However I will still try to. As I often can't sleep at night anyways so I write.
Onto the book :) )
Chapter Text
The one thing I hate about carnivals. Is the music anyone who spends hours listening to it. Must literally be losing it.
Then again I don't think anyone would think to walk up to the place and have Jazz blasting. It just doesn't fit I suppose.
Now I just need to find that tricky clown. Honestly one of these days someone is going to get hit by his clown car.
It's not even that silly but I've seen him almost hit people with it. I just need to listen for the beeping.
Either that or the laughing. He's always coming up with a way to amuse himself. I've seen that too. This beats being bored honestly it does.
See now this is what Sticklers lecturers should be like. Not whatever it is now. Anyways.
Ugh I don't hear any beeping right now. Oh well he must be somewhere.
Nevermind I can hear him from a mile away. You know if he was any louder everyone would be losing there hearing.
"Say miss Stageplay out with the family. on a trip I see care for a flower?"
" Sure why not."
I'm going to call it now. That is a water flower. It's the classic.
"Hahaha hahaha. I got you."
See I knew I called it. Well I mean who didn't see that coming. Nooo definitely not me.
"Yes yes well done. Now could you please kindly leave us to our trip."
"But of course my lady. I'll be off in my car."
If he gets in that car I'll have to spend hours running after him. This is going to be degrading.
"Ehem. Oh my goodness is that someone trying to make fun of clowns. Oh they are."
Well I had to think of something. At least it's not as embarrassing chasing around Beppi for hours.
"What where?!"
Well it got him over here that's for sure.
"Wait a smidge. Your trying to trick me. You know what you must trying to become a clown too huh. Well guess what there's only one clown in these parts and that's me end of. Get your own turf."
"What. No. Do I look like I want to be a clown honestly."
"I don't know. I mean even you, could be wanting to be a clown."
"Well I don't. My job is to be me. I'm the Devil seriously I wouldn't be caught dead as a clown."
"Fair point. So where's the whippersnapper who was saying clowns suck."
"Oh they ran away. Actually I wanted to ask you something."
"Drat! Yeah okay what is it. Do I owe you money or something."
"Umm no. If you did I think I would have mentioned it."
"Good point. Right then out with it Devi."
"Don't call me that."
"Fine fine now go on."
"Would you take a deal."
"It depends. But with you. Oh no sir. Sorry I made a deal with my car that I'd never make deals with you. Well if that's it we have a meeting to get to."
"What... You work here. You don't even have a manager."
"My car is my manager now good day."
I watched him hop in his car and drive off. Mad as usual. You know at thos point why hasn't he even gotten a speeding ticket.
Actually what did I even just hear. What is the car alive or something.
No I'm overthinking this Beppi is just Beppi really there isn't logic there. I can't put logic into something without it .
I haven't a clue what time it even is. I know that King Dice's show would be on today at some point in the evening.
I just want to listen to it live. Ugh I don't even know why. I will that's the end of that.
I noticed at the corner of my eye the hellelevator had been called over here. Great. Stickler is here.
"Excuse me. "
"What is it Stickler."
"I wanted to see how the progress was going. I can now tell it's going terrible."
"Oh yeah Sticker. You know really it's a wonder how it's even going anywhere at all."
"Here's an idea then sir. Go talk to someone who actually listens to you."
I can't just ask him. Oh hello King Dice. You know. Me and you have had 2 conversation's. Oh would you work for me? Besides I think he's just sick of fame. He's probably just using me to scare off his fans a little bit. But what I'd do for that kind of fame.
My fans they, love me in a different way. The way they like him is complete and utter adoration I wish I had that.
I don't want to even tell Stickler about Dice. If I do well he'd probably just say it's never going to happen. That and I wasn't going to try it. Not unless it's a last resort.
I mean he did say he wanted to watch me take someone's soul. Which is already odd. I forgot he'd even said that one. I'll have to ask him about that if I ever see him again.
"Oh that totally exists Sticker. Ohh here's an idea get a list of dumb people."
"They would not be able to do the job. How many are even left sir?"
"On the list you gave me 9."
"Well there you go then sir. You have more options still."
"Well that's true."
"Are you coming back to hell sir?"
"Of course I am. There's no point standing around here anyways. It's getting nowhere."
"Hmmm I could tell that sir."
I got onto the elevator and pressed the button to go back to hell. Hopefully it's been fixed now. Ugh it better not get stuck or I'm going to miss my show.
Chapter 9: Chapter 9: Lamp Lamp The Great Lamp Who's The Greatest Of Them All?
Chapter Text
I probably haven't missed it. Oh great Stickler is talking.
"You really must be collecting souls soon."
"As I have said many times Stickler I'm working on it."
"Hmm yes. Because watching King Dice is going to help with that."
"What. Who told you!? I mean no I'd never watch him ew. Game shows suck."
"Sir you just admitted you did. Besides Henchmen told me. You'd met him and you were talking to him."
"Bullshit. That's what he's saying. If I did talk to him which I don't. Why would I even bother watching his show."
"Henchman told me you might do this sir."
What was he telling him. Oh look at the Devil doesn't know what's wrong with him at the moment. Or does he know something I'm not getting here. So what I like talking to the guy.. I like his voice. He's sort of charming... He's umm nice to be around. He's not afraid of me. Oh and um.
Oh. Shit. No I'm probably overthinking it.
"Sir are you alright. You look like you're almost embarrassed. I guess Henchman was right. You know I'll have to report this."
I just tried to blow him up again. "Still wearing that sweater...
"It is in my best interests to do so."
" Well anyways look Stickler. How about you don't just this once hmm. Let me put it this way. You tell them about this. One word of it not only will you be in trouble. So will I."
"I'm not the one who's in love am I."
"Stickler. Stickler. Stickler. Honestly. Do you really want me to explain something to you. I'm not in love with him."
"Oh is that so sir even an idot could see you are."
"Well listen I'm only pretending to like him so that he works for us."
"Oh I didn't think of that. Well go ahead I won't stop you I guess. I will no longer need to report it in that case."
Well that worked. Ugh that was close. Too close. You know what if that issue is sorted great. He just thinks I'm pretending to like him.
Thing is I don't mind the guy. Ugh who am I even kidding. Well everyone including myself. If I say it enough it will become a reality.
Finally. That stupid elevator dinged. Ugh great I'm back at hell. Hang on I don't remember there ever being a lamp there well. It's one of those Oil lamp things. Probably I don't know.
"Whats the deal with the lamp Stickler."
"Werner Werman said you should take it as payment. For the drinks. From a few days ago. So I put it there sir."
"Great yeah. Give the Devil a useless lamp." I pick the lamp up and stare at it. It was in a complete state. " Not only is it useless it's dirty. Who even lets metal get to this state. Ugh it needs to be cleaned. I mean is this even going to come off."
"Sir... "
I try scratching the dirt off with my nail.
"Sir. Maybe you should try rubbing the lamp."
"Oh yes because every single lamp is magic." Then again this is the isles. I wouldn't be surprised. You know what I'll humour him just this once. I rub the lamp.
"... I guess I was wrong."
"Oh you think huh. Ew well now I need a bath. Great thanks Stickler. " I put the lamp down it begins shaking. Well you know what I think I'm just looking at a lamp with a rat in it. That's definitely what this is. Great. Fantastic you can -
"Who dares to call Djimmi the great?!"
"Oh it was magic. Let me guess I have 3 wishes. "
"I didn't think it was his lamp. Well it saves you a trip sir."
"Oh I didn't think of it like that. "
"Can you let me say the line."
"Oh of course be my guest it's just cliche but go ahead." Wait so Werner just handed me Djimmi. Umm well that was a bad idea. Then again he probably just saw gold and thought oh that will do it.
Either that or someone is lying here. Ehem Stickler.
"You have 3 wishes. Master what are they ."
" Ummm nothing right now. You know I wasn't exactly expecting it to be your lamp actually. No I was more thinking it was just dirty no offence."
"I don't get out much to clean it."
"Right ... So I can wish for anything. "
"Pretty much except for love. I can't make anyone fall in love. "
"So in other words you work for me."
"... As much as I'm not entirely happy about it yes."
"Great. So if I was say to wish that you did it would be true."
"I'd probably void that one. No offence but working for one person just isn't how i want to spend my eternity. I like to give people wishes."
"What if I never make one."
"Then I will be here until you do make them. Well in the lamp is that all."
"For the moment."
Oh goody I have Djimmi. Well sort of. It's better than nothing. I could always just wish the casino to do better. Where's the fun in that. I have plenty of ideas for a wish for chaos later. I just think I should for once. Just save it.
"Well bye for now then. Rub the lamp when you want to make your wished remember you only have 3."
I watched him go back in the lamp. I picked it up off the floor and put it were it was it's safer there.
Hang on where did Stickler go. Wait no the show I'm going to miss it.
I run off to my room and turn the TV on. Well what can I say I had my ways to get one. I mostly just used it to tune into radio stations. That and the people making it occasionally broadcasted something.
Great I didn't miss it.
"Hello everyone it's time for everyone's favourite roll the dice."
I sigh. You know if it wasn't for the fact that you hadn't a reason to help me. Yet you did. Or the fact that you somehow have a way of getting me to talk to you.
Natural talent. That's it your.. A natural leader. It makes sense Dice it really does. Why am I even thinking like this. You know this might be a problem.
Oh hey Dice what do you do. Yes I've met you 2 times. Both of which are nice hey want to hang out more. No no no not going to happen.
If I see him again I'll talk to him it can't hurt a soul. Well it could his. But who's telling who. What am I saying.
He still had that nice - no. That's enough thinking about him. His show is still a great evening passtime-.
I didn't notice my door was open. Henchman had walked in.
"Duaww boss you really do watch his show. "
"Ugh I was just testing to see what it was. You know have you heard of knocking."
"Uhh yeah I just thought you'd be asleep I uhh brought Djimmi's lamp. I thought it would be safer on your dresser."
"Right well put it there and get out."
"You got it boss."
"And one more thing Henchman not a single word about this to Stickler I mean it."
"I'm so sorry about what I said it was an accident."
"Don't do it again."
"I won't. Umm good night boss." I watched him close the door leaving me once again to the show, and my thoughts.
I do wonder how long it will take before I'm back in that rosy dream state again. Probably a while. Consdering I now have to worry about Stickler accidentally finding out what I was saying is another lie.
Ugh this ridiculous. I'll just get on with the list as a distraction at this point. That way he's less suspicious. Sure he's buying it now but for how long?
Chapter 10: Chapter 10: Flying Houses? Am I Losing My Mind? Surely I Am In More Ways Than One.
Notes:
(See the end of the chapter for notes.)
Chapter Text
I must have sat around for hours. I'd managed to disassociate from everything around me.
The next thing it's know it's becoming day time. It was just me my thoughts. The day dream I had made for myself.
I don't even know how I even managed this. What is it with me honestly. I mean I'm not entirely clueless why entirely anymore.
However it's getting kind of annoying a keep doing it. Ugh well I guess I better just get up . Even if it is most likely early.
I look at the clock on the wall. Oh its 5am oh well. I'll just get up anyways. It's not really like it matters that much.
What it's 2 hours until 7. Most people on the isle get up then for work. Well it would make sense if they do.
They have work to do. Unlike me who just does whatever I want.
Firstly I maybe should get some tea or something. I don't know. It might give me something to do for a total of a couple minutes.
It's better than nothing. I opened to door to my room. Walked out of it to go and find the kitchen so that I could make tea. I hoped that Stickler or anyone for that matter wouldn't be awake at this time. Ugh he might be. Oh how am I going to explain this one. I'll come up with something if indeed he's around. I shouldn't have anything to worry about though.
I mean I can come up with something. If I couldn't well. Thats not very much like me. I can always come up with some elaborate lie. At this point sometimes I can't even see whats my lie and whats real. I guess If you lie enough it just becomes part of who you are.
It's a taught thing. Pepole don't start of knowing how to lie. Pepole learn it for a lot of different reasons. Still none can hide there micro expressions. You could still learn how to make a fake expression that way pepole would be more likely to believe the lie. Most pepole haven't a clue how to detect those expressions.
Some pepole can though well. You'd have to learn that one. Of course I know how to detect them. I'm Devil it comes in handy. Very handy. It helps me make those deals. Not that I have been doing that recently.
While I was thinking about this. I must have just been looking for tea in the cupboard. Boiled some water and stat there with the tea made just staring into space. At this point I wouldn't be surprised. It seems of late thats all I have been doing. With the amount of pepole that are even considered on this list. Its getting smaller and smaller every single day sometimes more than once In a day.
"Excuse me Sir?"
"WHA AH!" For the first time in a long time. I'd outwardly gotten shocked by his sudden appearance. I had also dropped the cup onto the floor and it smashed. I looked at the now wasted tea. Usually that would have annoyed me. It still is annoying. I maybe just don't have the energy to deal with it.
"I'm sorry sir. I didn't mean to scare you. Are you sure you aren't thinking about something?"
"Stickler what is it?"
"I just wanted to say that you don't seem yourself sir. You should really try and relax a little. I will allow a little bit of slack sir. Only this once."
"Are you really Stickler?!"
"Yes I'm me. Its you who should be doing a little thinking sir. Just get through the rest of that list and take a holiday. Promise me you will."
"Well thats nice of you. Fine I promise I will then I will be me. As you clearly think something is wrong. I can't believe I just said that."
"Thats the nicest thing you have said to me sir. I hope you go back to be yourself later."
What is going on. Well I have an idea. I mean maybe taking time to think more might be a good idea. Thats saying something as it is coming from Stickler. But this isn't like him either. Well its a good start to maybe just get this list over with.
Even though its more just something to do. Ugh I'm going to be bored during that holiday maybe I could find a train that would be fun. Right list umm. Wally Warbles so I'm looking for a bird am I? Well thats easy just a bird in the sky. Not like I'm looking for a needle in a haystack is it.
No I am. Theres loads of birds outside. What makes this one so different anyways. Well I guess I'm finding out. One way or another. Usually I'd be thrilled to have time off. I just want to distract myself thats all I want to do. Which not usual for me.
Right umm I'll just go to the city that way I could try and scan for this bird it shouldn't be too hard right? I pressed the button on the elevator and waited for it to get to where I told it to go and stepped out.
As soon as I stepped out I head screaming as usual. "Yes yes. I'm the Devil big deal."
They weren't what I was looking for anyways. Am I seriously going to have to walk around staring at the sky. I better not walk into someone while doing this.
Well I don't see any other less embarrassing way to find this guy. I mean if he can fly why wouldn't you. I mean makes sense I teleport a lot of the time.
I keept on walking around looking at the sky. Then glancing at where I was.
I stopped for a second. I thought I'd just hallucinated. There was a flying house. At this point it might actually be the guy I'm looking for.
I ran in the direction the house was. Just so I could say I tried. Then again I could just cross it out.
Before I knew it. I'd ran into someone. Not just anyone . Dice. Why did it have to be him.
While I sort of pretended like I hadn't just ran into him. I heard from the sky a little bit of there conversation.
"See this is why we fly there'd be no running into eachother."
"You are completely right besides flying is faster. Dad. Much faster. About 50 present of there time is wasted in traffic."
"That's my son. Not sure if that one's completely correct but it sure takes them awhile."
"I am so sorry... I'm not sure what's worse here. "
I snapped out of it what exactly was he even refering to... Oh he'd caught me. He must have nearly knocked me over. When he also ran into me . However he must have just ummm. Done this.
Why am I just drawing a blank. I want to say something. No no list first I said I wouldn't get distracted.
I said I'd keep lying to myself. Only 7 more then I can just go on holiday. Yes forget about all of this.
Forget about him. Forget about what he did for me with no reason to. Forget about... Okay no it's not going to be that simple why would it ever be.
"This is the first time I think I've ever heard you say pretty much nothin' to me."
Trust me Dice. If I wasn't drawing a pretty much blank I would. I don't want to say something stupid.
"Do you maybe just want me to put you down? I mean I was going to. I really don't think you've ever not responded to me."
"... Dice just put me down."
"Right here." He just puts me back on the ground. Great now I. Ugh this is infuriating.
Oh why do I have to like him. Why couldn't I be someone in hell. At least then in the view of everyone up here it wouldn't be as illegal.
But nooo I- fall in love. There I said it. Even if it was to myself. I'm probably red. I'm probably just staring at him.
I don't know what to say .
I need to get out of this situation.
"Ummm Dice I have a meeting to go to. Prohaps we can talk whenever we meet again."
Yikes that was bad. I don't think I've made such a fool out of myself in years.
"Yeah sure talk to you another time Devil. One more thing sorry again. I never said why I was runnin' away from my fans. Of late they are being a little more touchy."
I had to react I had the perfect chance to walk away.
"Well that's just stupid."
"Yeah well fame isn't always great. Well have fun at your meetin'."
"Goodbye Dice." Nevermind maybe he doesn't want to see me cause chaos. Of course if I see it happening well they won't be lucky.
"Goodbye Devil." I heard him say this after went in another direction away from him.
Why do I care. Well that I already explained. Me jealous no. Never. Right ummm. Ugh .
The really right to the candy land of boredom. Well actually most people don't know it exists.
It's a good hiding place if you ignore The Baroness. I should remember where exactly it is I really hope I didn't forget.
Notes:
So umm it's now going to be tagged Devildice. Even though it's pretty one-sided. It won't be in the second book. For now until I finish this one and start that one it is.
Chapter 11: Chapter 11: That's a lot of sweets
Chapter Text
I think I've gotten myself lost great. I've been wandering around in the woods for hours. I mean it felt a lot like it had been.
Ugh of course the entrance never shows its self when you want it too. I mean not that I really like Candyland all that much. I'm not the biggest fan of sweets as such. I mean cake. I'm quite partial to that. Thats for sure.
Thats the only kind of sweet thing as such I like. Its not my thing. I'm only even out here to find the entrance talk the crazy lady for 5 minutes leave and never come back. I mean I can't exactly break her rules , then I'll become candy. Such a stupid punishment and its permanent well sort of. Well it is if your not me.
I'm the Devil I can undo anything that they throw at me. Anyways how far is this stupid candy land.
It's much further than I first thought it was that's for sure.
Eventually after what felt like another our I saw the giant peppermint rolling around. I followed it knowing fine well it would take me there.
I just walked into sugarland as it's called. As soon as I did she was there.
"Well hello there Devil. It's been a while huh. What you can't resist these sweet treats?"
"No I still don't really like them that much."
"Aww you really don't want a tiny bite of my castle. Doesn't it look delicious."
"No. It does not that's beside the point."
"Uh uh and what's that. You want me to turn away so you can sneak a bite. " I watch her turn her back to me and cover her eyes.
Same old tricks with her. Every single time it's. Oh want to eat the castle. No I do not.
"Will you listen to me?"
I watch her turn to look at me again "Fine fine."
"I've been wandering around the isles looking for someone to work for me."
"Not sure if you are forgetting. The ancient curse that's keeping me here."
"Right that. For once that wasn't something I did."
"Exactly. Wait a second! Do you know how get rid of it. Oh please tell me you do!"
"No I don't. Sorry to tell you. The. "
"Ah you remembered my shortened name. Well! Don't come back here until you can break this curse. Theeeen I'll consider working for you."
"It's not something I can break."
"Then the answer is no. Now get out."
I just walked out listening to her. I'd rather not spend another minute in that place. It's far too much sugar. Think of the cavities from that place. Now that is disgusting to think about.
Well that was another failure. The thing about her is that she does have a curse. However it wasn't places by me dispite it sounding like something I'd do.
I can't just go around undoing curses. Well I can my own but that's different. I don't even remember how she got it in the first place.
Therefore I can't remove it.
Oh come on. It's already night really. Well back to my room to sit around for the night. As none in there right mind works at night. Well some people do.
Just not as many as the day. All I have to do is make it until morning get all the others to say no. Have a holiday come back and realise I've gotten nowhere.
Chapter 12: Chapter 12: The Flower and there Garden
Notes:
(See the end of the chapter for notes.)
Chapter Text
Again I didn't sleep. I just sat there staring until finally it was 7 in the morning.
I was just about to telport out before there was a knock on my door.
"Yes who is it?"
"Umm. It's just me boss I wanted to ask how you are doing." Henchman said this while he opened the door. With some donuts in hand. He must have brought them for me. Oh goody I don't mind them that's for sure.
"Thank you Henchman. "
" No problem boss so are you nearly finished with that list Stickler told me about what you are going to do."
"Oh did he. It appears like you both have gotten very good at telling each other things."
"Uhhh yeah boss. He's really not that bad. "
"Yeah sure Henchman. Well just leave them there I have the list to do. Then I can do whatever I want..." The thing is. I only agreed to Sticklers request so that he wouldn't bother me. I don't really want to sit around on a stupid holiday. I mean seriously what am I going to do.
Spend the entire time bored. Run around causing some chaos. Ummm what do I talk to Dice. I mean not that I really want to entirely. But well that would pass the time. I could accidently collect souls. If its an accident its not counted as work right? No it probably is.
I walked out the room and then teleported away. I knew exactly where I needed to go. To the angry flower. Well he's just him really. Its annoying. That and I'm pretty sure he's part of the garden of the Rootpack at this point. They just call themselves that. Meaning two at once score. Well no not really its just easier.
Either way. Getting rid of two off the list is. great. Right where are they?
"Oi Devil. Don't you stand on my flowers. I see you there." Theres the flower. My question was answered. Well one of them. I would love to know where the others are.
"Now Cagney here's the thing. I'm not stepping on the flowers. See none of them are being harmed."
"What do you want?" Ohhh cooperation we love to see this one. A rarity really Cagney it is. Not that i'd tell you that one. Still great to see you. Pepole helping oh its perfect. Well he's not helping he's just hearing me out.
"Well I thought you might. prohaps want to work with me."
"Hmmm let me think. " I watch him pick up a phone from a tree and dial it.
I stare at him doing this. Then I overhear what he's saying. Over the phone. This joke of being part of a gang is going too far.
"Yeah so Goopy can you tell Werner that's he's telling me about it too. Are you hanging out with Beppi right now?"
"Ohhh right yeah. Well I'll tell him. Thank bye see you guys later."
Well this is just great couldn't be better. Oh let me just call up Stickler about it. Seriously that has the same feeling as what he just did.
"The answer is no. Also Beppi says leave his cars friends alone. Look Devil maybe you should find a way to get a person on the isle who likes you... Maybe you should be nice for once."
"Those are fighting words Cagney." Is he seriously trying to get. Me the Devil to play nice. Never going to happen. Besides I think what asking Goopy is going to be like.
At this point. I don't even care anymore. I just don't want him telling me what to do. I'm the literal Devil.
"Oh boo hoo go ahead fight me if you want oh wait if you did that you'd get a fight with more than just me."
"Hence why it is not worth my time. Now wheres your buddys?"
"What Sal, Chauncey and Oille. Over there. Why planning to ask them. The answer will be no."
"Great thanks. I'm aware. I do this I get to do nothing." I walk off to the other part of the garden.
I don't even care anymore. Actually here's a new thing oh I've got it. Let's just get all of this over with in a Day.
Should be easy then I can just go back to sitting around waiting for something to happen.
Either that or it's a silly quest to talk to Dice whichever comes first.
Notes:
Don't worry we will get Goopys full chapter after the Rootpack they are next :) then it's Hilda and last but not least Ribby and Croaks. Then I will be writing the next book. Which is a lot more Devildice than this one. I wanted to set the story up a lot. I just get ideas and trust me on this one it's going to get somewhere.
Also the final chapter will tell all ps there might be an 18th chapter. I'll see.
Chapter 13: Chapter 13: Hey I thought Vegetables were good for you
Chapter Text
You'd think that in terms of even talking to vegetables seems stupid. I mean honestly who bothers they are the complete and opposite of being good for you.
They are infuriating. I mean sure they share the garden with Cagney. But seriously for vegetables they know how to party.
I also know a little bit about them. Enough to know that talking to Oille would scare him. Sal would say no, as for Chauncey he'd just try and hypnotise me to get me to leave.
So either way I already know it's a no. But then again if you don't ask you don't get. It's a saying. You have to ask otherwise nothing is ever going to get done. I mean besides I'm not sitting around am I.
As soon as I got near them made a noise to tell them. The Devil is right here. I mean I could have just said hello but this way is sometimes more effective.
"ehem."
"Nope come on Ollie."
"What is it Sal? O-oh..."
"I'll deal with this. Don't worry you two."
Great i'm going have to deal with this , I can't be bothered at all. "You know all I was going say is would you work for me yes or no."
"No why would anyone give or do anything for you. "
"Many pepole come to me with there problems. Oh this so and so and so is being horrible get rid of them or oh I need money . That sort of thing."
"Well I don't need anything. "
"Great good to know." I don't really care about that to be honest. I mean seriously I'm only doing this to give myself something to do. Well saying that the original plan was to get someone to work for me. Oh how's that one going. Hmm let me think not good not good at all.
Seriously it couldn't be going worse. I know what it's going to come to. I'm not sure I like it though. I mean seriously I feel unbelievably stupid asking him . But what a shame it will be done.
These are rejections are getting easier honestly. Right Goopy. Now the only issue is I head Cagney's phone call I know exactly who he's with.
I think they are staring at me. What can't the Devil think! Am I seriously seen as that much of a mence...
So what everyone sees me as bad news. It's a feeling they get. I think Stickler explained it once. I believe it's to keep them away from me. To make them afraid it's apparently some kind of aura demons give out. See sometimes I do pay attention.
It carries on even if I'm not wandering around looking like this. I think. I don't remember that much of the conversation. You know what if that was gone. No no I think that one is a terrible idea.
"... Guys I think the devil is completely zoned out quick get out of here." I hear Chauncey saying this. Prohaps he was just making sure I didn't try something. Either way. After that I just saw them bouncing away in the corner of my eye.
Speaking of bouncing I should really get that one over with. I should probably start walking endlessly into the forest again. Seriously why is it that they all live near each other sure. But half of them have to live in the woods really.
Oh come on. It had to get worse really.
"Hey Mugsy. You ever thought that maybe the Devil has actually given up?"
I had to hear them. Why couldn't it have been Dice. Please anything but these cups.
"Cuphead, I think that's never - C-Cuphead" mugface had to look at me. Seriously so what I'm me I'm doing nothing. I'll just keep on walking away.
"Aww what's the matter Mugsy what is the Devil there. Oh he is wow would you look at that the saying is true. Speak of the Devil and he shall appear."
"It's not funny Cuphead."
"Eh I ain't to worried about it. Besides he's walking away."
That's the last of the conversation I overheard. Sometimes I honestly think that. Everyone is just against me. Seriously how do I keep running into people I don't even want to see anymore. Ugh it's a nightmare. It will all end soon. With nothing changing. Meaning I'll just have done this for nothing. Maybe they are right. I am losing my touch.
Chapter 14: Chapter 14: The Blob and there gang
Chapter Text
Then again. Maybe I just am forgetting who I am. Impossible how could I do such a thing. I'm the Devil.
To go with all of this. I just kind of want to talk to Dice. Stupidly. Seriously. I should pay more attention -
"Ow. Okay who put this tree here!" I'd walked into a tree. Of course saying who put that tree here was utterly stupid. Trees grow wherever the seeds fall.
Why there did it want me to walk into it. I do hope none was... Watching.
"Oh oh Devil. You just walked into a tree." I just hear Goopy burst out laughing. Looks at Cagney he starts laughing and so does the rest of the gang.
"Ja ja. Oh look at me ya. See this tree oh I can't see it. " I watched as Werner slowly moonwalked into the tree. Seriously. Even the rat finds it funny.
"Oh no no no Werner don't. I think I'm dying." Oh no please Goopy go ahead. I think we all know where you will be ending up.
"Ehem."
"Oh are you going to pretend to be a clown again. What's the password first."
Am I seriously going to have to play a game with these guys. Ugh I could just... I could set them on fire. No no if I did that right now. I'd have Stickler hammering on and on about. Oh property damage. How am I ever going to cover this up. Oh too much paperwork.
As much as I hate this it's better to play along.
"Umm, my car."
"Darn how did you know! It's wrong! The correct term is my car is now my manager good day but close enough." I hate this guy. Honestly. I'm starting to feel glad he doesn't work for me.
"Right look I am under time here. All of you."
"Oh let me guess Devi gonna ask you. The same thing Goopy . Hmm or not let's watch." Trust me I don't see much point. Beppi. I don't really want any of you to work for me.
I see now it's not what I want. You wouldn't do it right!
"You know what no. I don't want to. Actually. Have fun in your gang."
"Why thank you Devi we will. Beppi away." I'm not even going to bother trying to correct them anymore.
"Zoom" oh really we are making kids sound effects now. Honestly how old are you all five. Seriously I've seen five year olds way more mature than you guys.
I don't even know how that's possible. Also where am I. I never even stopped to realise I'm somewhere random. Ugh. So what I'm either looking for floaty lady or two frogs. In a bar known as the fly trap.
You know what drinks somewhere where I don't have to make them sounds actually great. Well I don't make them exactly. I get someone else to do it. But peace and quiet away from hell.
Sometimes I forget to enjoy it honestly. Well I guess getting out of the woods to another body of water is probably a good start. Oh because why wouldn't it stay on water.
Then again that one makes sense. I still hate water. Well again it's just me my constant anyoying thoughts about certain people. Things work and oh how could I forget the little anyoying. Sound I'm hearing...
No wait that's the sound of a boat well I'm going that direction then. Convenient if I don't say so myself. Then again it is getting late which makes sense if they are opening it. You can't have a bar open at day . That isn't the point it's a night thing not a day thing.
Chapter 15: Chapter 15: The Fly Trap
Notes:
(See the end of the chapter for notes.)
Chapter Text
I eventually came across the boat. Great . The two frogs were standing outside it welcoming people into the place.
Well you had to pay the get in. No problem I can just make money whenever I want. It's a great way to tempt these sinners honestly.
That and sometimes it works. With these two it almost always works. Money with them is the most easy thing to bribe them with.
Of course I'll ask them about, working for me . But I really don't care for them to work for me. All they would do is just start fighting so there's not much point to it.
I just walked over to them . I mean honestly I can get in easy.
"Hello. You two staying out of trouble?" Now of course I know fine well of there record. Fighting all the time causing fire. Oh yes no matter how they try it keeps happening. I know fine well how it is going to be eventually.
"Well of course we are. Now what can we do you for Mr Devil."
"I'll give him a fight."
"Now now there's no need to be like that. Prohaps he wants something. So as I was saying what can I take you for."
"Well firstly I'd like in. Second I have to ask I'm under a little bit of a list you see. Now would you work for me."
"I'll tell you what I think about working for you with my fists. "
"Now now Croaks we shouldn't do that. We are trying to be respectable types now. It's 25 bucks to get in."
See look progress. Now not only do I have a normal conversation. I can get into the boat. I still hate boats. I haven't been on one without Henchman before.
I better not start feeling sick. Well I made about 100 bucks appear. Look that way I can get on with doing whatever I want and they wouldn't say a darn thing. It's called bribes.
I then handed it to Croaks. "There I believe that should do it. Just keep the change. I don't care. Money has little meaning to me. So now am I allowed on. "
"Of course Mr Devil right this way we will show you to your seat."
I followed him to a table which was quite a bit away from most people in a sort of quieter but not entirely silent place.
There was also quite a few people around the place but not where I was. I mean perfect a nice bit of well deserved silence.
I sat down at the table.
"Well can I offer you any wine or anything else, on the menu completely free of course. "
"Wine would be wonderful thank you. " Well as much as I would bother to browse through it. Who could pass up an offer for free wine. Well I would have maybe bothered to look through it.
"I'll bring that too you." I watched them walk away. It wasn't long until I was in my own thoughts again.
I might if I start to feel sick again. Honestly me not liking the water. No I don't. Actually I feel maybe like I should have brought Henchman with me. At least then I wouldn't be sitting here. On my own. Actually it sounds strange me the Devil hating being alone. But I never am there's always someone around. This time there isn't.
The last person on my list is Hilda then what. Thing is I know exactly what I need to do. I really should just talk to Dice. Then what I'm just going to make everything worse for myself.
I said I'd get it done in one more day. What are the chances she is sitting in here. But not just that what is even the point.
I looked around at the people. In the place they sort of just kept glancing at me. Then at some of the tables over by me. I also think I spotted Hilda.
Here's a new thing. Oh no the devil gave up. Ugh yes I just can't be bothered. The only person I really want working for me. Is Dice but I feel so stupid thinking about it.
Let alone the fact that they are both right. I hate to admit it. I have admitted it before. I do think somehow I've just gone into a complete waste of time ,and that my heart is the only thing I should be following. Not some stupid list.
But no we had to go the hard way with everything.
"Here's your wine mr Devil." I'd sort of heard what they had said to me. I wasn't really paying much attention to anything really.
"Oh yeah thanks." I sort of just said that one without thinking. Let alone the fact that I'd started yo forget where I was or what I was doing.
I just knew that finish list. That was important oh and um what was the last one. I don't even know.
I think I might have just been drinking the wine at this point. Because a lot of my thoughts are becoming sort of jumbled.
Oh right that was it Dice. Yes I just have to find him. Umm and do what. Oh Dice. I just have to talk to you. In private why won't you. Hmm it's so nice to. Do so. No no no . Why did it end up becoming like that in my head.
Notes:
(I literally can't come up with any creative names for this chapter. No problem though it's fine. It gets the point across.)
Chapter 16: Chapter 16: What Did I say?
Notes:
(See the end of the chapter for notes.)
Chapter Text
I don't really know what I'm thinking about anymore. It seemed a lot like this wine just doesn't end. I just don't care about Hilda. She's not really what I want so I won't bother anymore.
Oh goody. Oh a stage you know wouldn't it be funny if I just asked random stuff on there.
I just walked up to the stage. That those frogs weren't on.
"Hey hey so. Listen hi you all know me as the Devil. "
"Hey oh come on. Get off the stage. "
"No no. So listen Hilda what do you say. Work for me. There fucking Stickler. I said it. Haha. So yeah anyone seen a dice anywhere. I appear to have lost him?"
"I wouldn't have worked for you anyways. If you ment it you wouldn't have been drunk!" First of all I'm not second of all. Fuck you I'm perfectly capable of seeing you are useless anyways.
"Okay come on now get off the stage."
"Say how about we throw him-"
"This is all part of the show folks. Don't worry. The Devil is-" what are you stupid. I'm just me.
"Being nothing but an actor. No you see you both really are dumb. I think what you mean is. I'm just me simple. Not only that I'm clearly winning I'm on the stage not you."
"That's it-"
I then saw him . He'd came back oh hello.
"... He asked for me didn't he."
"Mr King Dice please sit back down. We will deal with it."
"No let me won't you. Besides if it's me he wants while he's like this I don't think he'll do anythin' so no I'll deal with it."
"Well just get him out of here then. He's running the stage. It's now ON FIRE. Hey you're paying for that."
"I'm going to pound him."
"Just let him go we will sue later. It's a good thing we are now back docked honestly."
I just know Dice picked me up and just walked away with me. I was to busy setting fire to things. "Dicey~ you ruined my fun. I thought you quite liked chaos. "
"Oh please. I haven't a clue what you are talking about. "
"You do~"
"... What that one comment? I made to you. Also don't call me Dicey. Please. Look I'm glad it's so dark that none would really be out anymore. "
"Oh let me at least call you , Dicey. Don't spoil more of my fun~ you know Dice have I told you something."
"Told me what."
"I like you. There's just something so charming about you.~ "
"Right and what does -"
I think with the amount I'd drank and the strange sleep I'd had for a long time id passed out. I think I did.
I don't remember anything about the dream I had . I don't even know where I'd wake up that one would be a mystery to me.
Id finally woken up. At some time I hadn't a clue. I was curled up on a purple sofa. With a coat on top of me...
I know who's this is. At least I believe it is. I then heard him. He'd walked into the room.
"Oh hello there welcome back Devil. I brought some water for you. "
"Umm thank you Dice." I just took the glass of water from him. I really haven't a clue what I did or what I said to him. Either way I'm assuming this is his house. But what even warranted me being here.
"No problem. But seriously maybe try not to go around saying random things. Sure set fire to whatever you want but. I don't know. You just seem petty done and out of it . Why did you want me? Somethin' about me being pretty charming was it?"
"I really don't know what you are even talking about?"
"Right you don't remeber, I though you might remeber somethin'."
"Well I don't. What did I say."
"Nothin' much really. You probably didn't mean it anyways. You now owe me twice. Well you feelin' much better?"
"Quite thank you Dice. What twice what do you mean?"
"I saved you from gettin' attacked by Ribby and Croaks also you might have to pay for fire damage."
"Oh right. Yeah I didn't even know I did that. So wait did you carry me here."
"Yes I did."
Oh. Well great, I could have said anything to him. But I called him charming. Well at least I didn't go on about too much then. Maybe I asked him to work for me perhaps this is no then. But so very nicely. Then again hes still being nice.
He carried me here and left me asleep on his sofa. He could have left me. Again why do you help me. Is this just to confuse me more and more. Ugh it seems like you are sometimes Dice. It just makes me realise though. I maybe didn't ask.
I should oh how I really just know that you. you have to work for me. I don't know why, you are perfect.
"Your quiet again. Yesterday you were all about talkin' to me. You even you know what never mind. I don't really think you ment any of it anyways."
"...It seems a lot like what I said is botherin' you."
"You sort of flirted with me. Well I think you were just playing though. It was probably just because you were just drunk. I don't think you ment any of it anyways. So lets not think about it."
"Oh I am so sorry. then. No... even then its not really an excuse. "
"Well I accept it as one. Besides. We all say things we don't mean."
What if I did mean it. Then what. You'd hate me too. No you just seem a lot nicer. That and what was that little detail oh right I remeber. You wanted to see me take a soul. Oh are you a little darker than you let on Dice?
"Well goodbye Dice. I do feel better to answer your question earlier, I'll see you whenever I do again Dice. I have to have some stupid holiday. That and Stickler and Henchman will be wondering where I have gotten too."
"Alright then. Goodbye Devil. I guess I'll get those favours another time. I'll have to open the door for you."
"You don't need to do that. I still have my pitchfork right?"
"... Yeah its next to you here. I took it with me." He handed me my pitchfork. its more shiny than before. You even polished it. None has done it that well before. Hello perfect henchman. Who said no oh so kindly. Then again I'm not so sure he did.
"Thank you Dice. Did you polish it?"
"Noticed yeah sorry it just looked like it needed it. You going to teleport away?"
"Yes I am going to teleport to hell. Well you did a great job."
"Thanks again then. Alright bye."
I teleported back to hell. there was chaos. Henchman was screaming about me going missing. Stickler was standing there following Henchman around. The other demons had disided to also petend to look for me.
Its been a day. Good golly imagine what this would be like in a week. "Ehem I'm here."
"Boss! your okay! I was so worried." Henchman ran over and was now hugging me. I don't mind I consider him as a friend.
"Oh well ... I lost track of time fell asleep somewhere and umm came back here. So verry sorry I worried you."
"I'm glad you are okay."
"Did you finish the list. Also all of you back to work!"
"Yes Stickler I did."
"And did you get anyone?"
"No I didn't."
I might as well not lie. Henchman let go of me. Then stood next to Stickler.
"Hmmm sir well its okay. Please make sure to try not to do any work then for the next couple of weeks. You must start to feel better by then."
"Oh I will thank you. Stickler. I also want to say something ."
"And whats that exactly?"
"Thank you. I might hate your methods but without you hell would be a state."
"Thats the nicest thing you have ever said sir thank you so much."
"No problem well I'll be gone for those few weeks now try not to get the place in a state. Also sorry If I accidently do work. "
I teleported away from hell again. Now I was free for a few weeks. I guess some plans just don't go ahead. Who knows maybe just maybe. I intentionally stick around for a bit I'll see Dice again. There is quite a few places in this isle where I can chill too. So its a win win i'd say.
That I know who it needs to be its just taking the time to come up with a plan to get him to say yes. Simple in theory but not so much in practice. Maybe its better I do forget about him. I don't want that now though.
Notes:
This is actually the last chapter of this book . I know he never actually got a henchman wasn't that the entire point. Why yes it was. However it was to find the henchman. Now that he has well lets just say it isn't actually him who suggests it. But ahh you'll have to see in the next book. Of this serries. Don't worry I am writing it. Its also going to be in Dice's Pov not the Devils anymore.
Fluffy radio (Guest) on Chapter 6 Fri 24 Feb 2023 11:06AM UTC
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FluffyWolfCat on Chapter 6 Fri 24 Feb 2023 12:43PM UTC
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