Chapter Text
Ghost didn’t have very fond memories from the holidays. Ghost didn’t have many fond memories in general, but he was learning how to make them. Unsurprisingly, they all revolved around Johnny. Ghost hoped they were in the middle of making one of those ‘happy memories’ then, but they were out to a bit of a shaky start. As far as Ghost was concerned, ‘happy memories’ didn’t usually involve being stared at by every person who saw him.
“Remind me what we’re here for again?” Ghost asked, giving the mall an evil glare as they approached.
“Christmas shopping,” Johnny answered. “I gotta get Lucy an airfryer because last year, Ronnie got his sister one and I am not being one upped by that git.”
“Right.. And why is she with us?”
“Because I want to be!” Patty answered from her perch atop Johnny’s shoulders. “And I need to get ma and da presents too.”
“We’re having a nice family outing,” Johnny smiled at him.
Ghost didn’t think nice was quite the right word. Nice was a lazy day in bed with Johnny. Nice was bacon and eggs and cold glass of bourbon to wash it all down. Being stared out by a bunch of judgmental civis was not nice.
All of the unwanted attention made Ghost’s skin crawl. He wanted to pull the beanie he'd borrowed from Johnny down over his face and hide from all the unfamiliar eyes. Ghost thought he would’ve gotten used to the attention, but scared respect from soldiers and judgemental whispering from civilians proved to be two very different beasts.
At least he had Johny though, who’s warm presence was a strong grounding force. That, and the fact that Ghost wouldn’t be caught dead having a panic attack in public, were what kept him going. And he still had the comfort of his mask too. Granted, it wasn't the skull version as both he and Johnny thought that would garner too much attention, but a mask was a mask.
"So, game plan," Johnny started as they entered the mall. "I'm gonnae go look for that damn airfryer, and you and Patty go explore and shop and do whatever yer heart's desire. Rendezvous at the kid pit in an hour"
"What happened to 'nice family outing'?" Ghost asked, desperately willing Johnny not to leave him alone.
"Yeah!" Patty complained. "You're supposed to be spending time with me, Uncle Johnny!"
"And you know how I'd love to," Johnny said, removing Patty from his shoulders and setting her on the ground. "But I can't exactly go Christmas shopping for people when they're with me."
"I'll be expecting a pony under my tree then?"
“Don’t get yer hopes up lass. Simon, the kid pit is in the center of the mall so it shouldn’t be hard to find. If you two aren’t there, I'm leaving ye.”
“And if you aren’t there, everyone dies.”
“Sounds like a plan. Have fun kiddos!” And with no further adieu, Johnny set off on his quest for the airfryer. Patty turned and looked up at Ghost expectantly.
“Well?” he asked. “What do you want to do?”
Patty smiled, and took Ghost’s large hand in her smaller one. She began to pull him deeper into the mall. “Ma gave me some money to buy Uncle Johnny a present. I want your help since you know him so well.”
“You sayin’ you don’t know your own uncle? That's cold kid.”
“Well I’d know him better if I saw him more,” Patty said pointedly. “But he’s always off saving the world on secret missions with you.”
Ghost made a noise of affirmation; that was technically true. He couldn’t remember the last time he’d had an extended leave like this, but it had never really mattered much to Ghost. He wondered then how their extraneous lifestyle affected other members of the 141. How long had they gone without seeing their families? How often did they think they’d never see them again?
“When was the last time you saw him?” Ghost asked, somewhat impulsively.
“Mmm, I think it was ma 7th birthday? We’re pen pals though, so we talked a lot over the years. He even sends me souvenirs from all the countries he visits.”
“That so? What was the last thing you got?”
“A postcard from Las Almas. And a bullet casing!” Patty smiled back at him with far too much enthusiasm. “Uncle Johnny said it was in his arm! Were you there?”
Ghost nodded, swallowing back the bile rising in his throat. “I was. Not a pleasant trip.”
“How come?”
“Classified.”
“That means secret right?”
“Right.”
“Damn. Well, ok. What should we get Uncle Johnny? Oh! What about something in there?” Patty pointed toward a shop on their right, pulling Ghost in without waiting for an answer.
The shop in question appeared to be some sort of craft store. It had an entire wall dedicated to various types of fabrics, most of which looked disgusting to touch. There were rows of paints, pencils, and pastels, as well as needles, thread, and buttons (just to name a few things). Ghost didn’t pay any of it much attention though, too focused on not losing Patty as she flitted about the store.
“Does Uncle Johnny still like drawing?” she asked. “Ma said he was really good at it. He even made me some doodles in his letters.”
Ghost thought about that. He didn’t know about like , but Johnny did draw a lot. Or he tried to, anyway, it was a little hard when they were down range. Ghost had been witness to many stake-out scribbles, poked into the dirt with loose sticks. He knew Johnny kept a secret sketchbook back at base, but he’d never seen any of its contents. Everyone needed a way to cope though.
“I think so,” was Ghost’s answer. “He could probably use a new sketchbook.”
“Like this one?” Patty held up a small, leatherbound book. It was a surprisingly good quality, but something else caught Ghost’s eye.
“Nah, get this one.” He held up a complete set- sketchbook, a set of pencils and an eraser. Ghost thought of all the times he’d listened to Johnny curse under his breath, sharpie in hand as he tried to draw. He deserved something nice.
Patty looked the set over, frowning. “I don’t have enough for that.”
Ghost frowned too. He looked around again, eyes locking on a set of charcoal pencils. Ghost hadn’t seen many of Johnny’s drawings, but he’d heard him lament over charcoal pencils enough to know he’d like them.
“You get the sketchbook, I’ll get the pencils. Two presents for one.”
Patty smiled, and held out her hand for Ghost to shake. “You’ve got yourself a deal Uncle Simon!”
They made their purchases and set off again, this time Ghost making sure to keep a firm grip on Patty’s hand. He kept a sharp eye out for the previously mentioned ‘kid pit’. Just like Johnny’d said, it was incredibly easy to spot. All Ghost had to do was follow the sound of children screeching, and his eyes landed on a large, enclosed playground in the center of the mall. Unfortunately, the food court was right next to it.
“Can we get food from that Chinese place?” Patty asked.
“Don’t think mall food is very healthy,” Ghost answered.
“That's the point? Can we please? You know, Uncle Johnny loves Chinese.”
Ghost sighed begrudgingly. “Fine. But don’t take too long.”
“We still have, like, 40 minutes until we have to leave. You can tell me all about your military stuff!”
“I don’t know about that.”
Ghost got them food, and Patty found a nice secluded corner for them to sit in. Of course, Ghost didn’t get food, though he made sure to get extra for Johnny when they met up again. Patty talked constantly, even with her mouth full which Ghost was sure to reprimand several times.
“So how did you become a Lieutenant?” she asked eventually.
“Experience,” Ghost answered.
“But isn’t Uncle Johnny older than you? Why are you a higher rank?”
“Age doesn’t equal experience.”
“What kind of missions have you been on?”
“Classified.”
Patty sighed, dropping her rice-filled fork onto her plate. “You really can't tell me anything? Anything at all? What's the point of doing cool stuff and saving the world if you can’t talk about it?”
“Being in the military isn’t cool, and the point is to save the world. To save people. Can’t do that if you go around spilling intel. Never know who could be listening.”
“So you can’t tell me any one thing about all your time in the military?”
Ghost sighed, but did think about it. He thought most of what he could tell wasn’t the kind of thing Patty wanted to hear. The truth was, outside of missions, life on base was pretty mundane.
“I used to have a dog,” he settled on. “Riley.”
“Really? I’ve always wanted a dog, but Da is allergic so we can’t have one. What kind of dog was he?”
“German shepherd; they make the best military work dogs.”
“He went on missions with you?”
“Sure did, saved my ass a few times.”
“That’s so cool! What happened to him?”
“Got shot in the leg. He survived, but we decided he deserved to retire early for his services. He’s with an old friend now.”
“Do you miss him?”
“Sometimes. I'm used to people coming and going though. Dog isn’t much different. You done eating?”
“Yeah. Hey, flex really quick.”
“Excuse me?” Ghost watched, perplexed, as Patty stood and made her way around the table towards him.
“Flex! You're big and muscular so I wanna see if I can hang from your arms!”
Ghost huffed, but stood and did as she asked anyway. It wasn’t impossible to tell Patty no, but damn was it hard. She leapt up a pretty impressive height for a 9 year old, and wrapped her hands around Ghost’s arms. He was surprised by how light she was.
“Do a pullup,” he said after a moment of her hanging.
“You have to buy me ice cream if I do,” she bargained.
“Do 2.”
“Deal.”
Ghost stood patiently as Patty attempted to pull herself up. After a minute of severe leg wiggling, Ghost was pretty sure his wallet didn’t have anything to worry about. Patty huffed, and dropped back to the ground defeated.
“Damn it!”
“You gotta work on your upper body strength if you're gonna go around demanding to do pullups on people’s arms.”
“You’re the one who told me to!”
“Thought you were tougher than that sad showing.”
“Why are you mean?”
“Habit.”
“Well stop.”
“Do a pullup and I might.”
Patty huffed and rolled her eyes. Her bad mood didn’t last long though, as something in the distance behind Ghost caught her eye. “Can we go look around in there?” she asked, pointing to yet another shop. From what Ghost could see, it was violently pink, and filled to the brim with stuffed animals.
“Absolutely not.”
“Why? You think you're too manly to go in a girly store?”
“No, but I am too manly for that one.”
“Well can I go look around in it while you stand outside like a wean?”
“Negative. You aren’t going anywhere I can’t see you.”
“Ma lets me look around shops.”
“Well that's dangerous. Find something safer to do.”
Patty rolled her eyes again, but didn’t argue further. “Fine. Can I go play on the playground then?”
“If you stay where I can see you, yes.”
“Good enough!”
Patty raced off without another word, leaving Ghost to quickly clean their food and follow after. He marveled for a moment at how Patty could so easily bounce from one thing to another. Such was the nature of children, Ghost supposed. He wondered if he’d ever been that way. He tried to remember, but came up with nothing but empty space where his childhood should have been. As far as he could remember, Ghost just popped into existence one day. Fully formed. And with no beginning, and one ending.
If Ghost couldn’t remember his childhood, it was probably for the best.
He found a bench with a good view of the entire area, and settled in for a boring 30 minutes. It was moments like that Ghost might let his mind wander, like he did on steak-outs, but his body was too tense to allow that. He couldn’t relax with so many people- so many possible threats- passing by so often. Not to mention the small child he was tasked with protecting. Ghost knew too well how many creeps there were out there, just waiting to take advantage of an unattended girl like Patty.
Not on Ghost’s fucking watch.
“She’s a cutie,” a woman’s voice said, far too close for Ghost’s comfort. He would have flinched had he not beaten that reaction out of himself years ago. Ghost quickly zeroed in on the voice’s owner: a woman with an armful of shopping bags, and a child sized jacket in the other. “May I sit?”
“Sure,” Ghost answered, still entirely too on edge.
The woman smiled as she sat. “Sorry, I didn’t mean to come off weird. I just saw you two over in the food court earlier and thought it was cute. I feel like you just don’t see a lot of fathers involved in their daughter’s lives nowadays.”
“She’s not my daughter,” Ghost quickly corrected, though he regretted it just as quickly.
“Oh?” the woman asked. The change in her expression was slight, but Ghost still caught it. Not like he could backtrack though, that would be weird.
“She’s my niece,” he amended. It was mostly true, he supposed. She called him uncle, and Ghost was acutely aware of how any other answer would make him look. Niece it was. “I'm babysitting.”
Immediately, the woman seemed to relax. “That's so sweet of you. You two seem very close, yeah? I have to say, watching you hold her with one arm like you did? That was quite impressive.”
“She’s light. Needs to eat more I think.”
“Oh I know how that is. Sometimes it feels like I can’t get my Timothee to eat anything that isn’t coated in sugar! You look like you know how to eat right though. What’s a man gotta do to get muscles like you?”
“Comes with the job.”
“And what would that be?”
“Classified.” Ghost mentally beat himself up for that one. He knew using military lingo made him stand out, and civis loved secrets. Anything other than a direct answer would only lead to more questions.
“Classified?” the woman asked. She had that tone that seemed to suggest she was being playful, almost like she didn’t quite believe his answer. “Do you work for the government?”
“Classified,” Ghost answered again. No point in trying to seem normal now.
“Oh don’t be a tease! You can’t tell me anything? Why don't we start with your name?”
“Who’s asking?”
“My name is Clarissa.”
“You a spy?”
Clarissa laughed, lightly hitting Ghost’s shoulder. “Is this an interrogation?”
“Feels like I should be the one asking that,” Ghost sighed, finally looking back toward the playground. Clearly, something about his tone of voice had been wrong, because the woman’s body language shifted. She was upset.
“Well, I'm just trying to be friendly,” she scoffed.
“None of my friends are this annoying,” Ghost deadpanned, scanning over the dozens of kids racing around before him. He was dimly aware of Clarissa saying something next to him, but she’d completely lost his attention. Blood began to roar in his ears as Ghost did another sweep of the playground. Patty was nowhere to be seen. Ghost cursed under his breath as he quickly stood, Clarissa now entirely forgotten.
“Patty!” Ghost called, just loud enough for his voice to carry over the children’s.
No response.
Ghost grabbed their bags and began to circle the playground. He took his sweet time scanning every nook and cranny in the area, but Patty’s sparkly pink beanie was no where to be seen. His pulse began to quicken.
“Patty!”
No response.
“Patty!!”
No response.
Ghost turned, shifting his focus to the area around the kid pit instead. He looked first for any suspicious looking individuals, but no one seemed to stand out. Some people did look at him oddly, though he supposed he looked quite odd anyway; an over six foot, muscular man hyperventilating in the middle of the mall was probably quite the sight. Ghost’s hand itched for the gun hidden safely within his jacket. He would point and shoot it at anyone if it meant finding Patty faster, but the logical part of him knew that wasn’t an option.
Ghost refused to fire on civilians. That was just wrong. So was kidnapping, but a kidnapper could be the exception, as soon as Ghost found him. Thankfully, there was no need for such extreme measures. On his third pass of his surroundings, the shine of something pink and sparkly caught Ghost’s eye.
Mercifully, like an angel sent from above, there was Patty. She was stood in the pink store Ghost had vetoed earlier, admiring a glittery stuffed horse from one of the shelves. Ghost might have laughed (or cried) with relief if he hadn’t been so quickly consumed by anger. He marched quickly in her direction. When he reached her, he pulled Patty so forcefully into her arms she almost screamed.
Some patrons gave him strange looks, but Ghost was too preoccupied to care.
“I told you to stay in eyesight,” he growled, unable to suppress the anger boiling within him. “Do you have any idea how much you just scared me?”
“Sorry, I got distracted,” Patty mumbled. Seeing her upset made some of Ghost’s anger dissipate, but not all of it.
“You have no idea how dangerous the world is, Patty, and I don’t want it to take you getting hurt for you to learn. You’ll always be safe if you listen to me, but if you don’t I can’t protect you.”
“But I can protect myself, Uncle Simon.”
“You can't! You’re a child! You shouldn’t have to.”
Patty sighed, leaning into Ghost’s tight embrace. “I'm sorry I worried you. I just wanted to look around.”
“I know. I should have let you. No more splitting up alright? We’re a team, we stick together.”
“Those sound like some pretty familiar words,” jeered a beautifully familiar voice from behind them. Ghost turned to see Johnny sauntering towards them, that same easy smile on his face that Ghost loved. “What have you two been up to hmm?”
Ghost didn’t even bother to answer, immediately pulling Johnny into a hug instead. It must have looked strange, he thought, to see a man bury his face into the shoulder of someone smaller. Ghost didn’t have the emotional capacity to care though. He was just happy to see Johnny again.
“Where's all the stuff you bought?” Patty asked, hovering around the pair. Ghost had enough sense to pull back, allowing the girl a hug of her own.
“Safely hidden in the car,” Johnny answered. “Couldn’t risk you seeing your presents.”
Patty quickly snatched a bag from Ghost’s hands, bundling it up in her arms. “Yeah, us too! You’re not allowed to look!”
Johnny laughed and nodded, throwing an arm around Ghost as the trio began their walk back to the car. “What about you Simon? What's in your bag of goodies?”
“Chinese,” Ghost answered, handing it over.
“Oh fuck yeah.”
“Language Uncle Johnny!”
“Haud yer geggie lass! I'm an adult aren’t I?”
“I hadn’t noticed,” Ghost mumbled, which earned him a hard pinch on the arm.
Slowly, Ghost could feel himself unwind. Johnny was talented like that. One of the stupidest, most annoying people Ghost had ever met, but also the only person who could calm Ghost’s inner chaos. Ghost might not have remembered much of his childhood. He might not have had many happy memories. But if all his happy memories could be like this, he didn’t mind learning how to make them.