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Within the moments between every collision, body screaming and aching from the impact, all Izuku could picture were striking red eyes. Kacchan. What had he endured all on his own while Izuku fled to the battlefield? With half lidded eyes peering in his direction, it took all the willpower of All Might himself to keep from running to his aid. He tries not to look back -- he cannot look back at him or the tide of this entire battle will shift. If it had not been for Lemillion, there would be no amount of strength that could hold him back. Knowing that he is alive is the only barrier between his actions and his thoughts. Why had he not gotten here quicker?
It distracted him, he knows it is distracting him. But, his mind cannot help but wander to the details. The simple idea of Kacchan fighting alone, running on pure willpower and fueled by rage. It must have been something to behold. The fiery determination. The entire battlefield ablaze with the bursts of nitroglycerin-fueled explosions. The details of the encounter plague his mind. What could he tell Kacchan when this was over? He was fighting All For One alone, and he was injured because of Izuku’s absence. One For All is designed for this confrontation, and Izuku barely made it in enough time. All Might would have never been late. All the blood that was shed today is on Izuku’s hands. All of Kacchan’s blood is on Izuku’s hands.
No one else can fight this battle for him. No one else will be hurt. Izuku will stand tall after this battle, fist raised, and demonstrate that he is here. All the months ago, during the UA Sports Festival, the words of All Might ring in his ears. It is now his turn to save and win, with a smile on his face. It is just enough to keep his mind on the task at hand.
But, how can he continue to smile, when his Kacchan is within reach, in unbearably agony, and he can do nothing. His obligations are torn between the automated actions of his duty to fight, and the yearning of his heart to run. Run directly to the side of Kacchan, if only to gently place his fingers on his pulse. What if Lemillion was wrong? Izuku hesitates. His heart stammers and his pulse quickens. This is not right. His symbol of victory lies fallen on the sidelines, and Izuku fights on without a single trace of injury. With his quirk deactivated, Shigaraki cannot strike. All his energy is consumed with defense. This can end quickly, if only he can continue to push beyond the excruciating pain behind every 100% smash. Maybe, if Eraserhead can hold out just a few moments longer, this hellscape can finally end.
Izuku aspired to be like All Might. But the fact of the matter is, Izuku can never live up to the expectation that he has for his mentor. Even knowing the shortcomings, All Might is untouchable. He cannot compete. He was late, and it may have cost Kacchan everything.
Another dodge from Shigaraki.
“DEKU”
The voice recognizable since he was young, reverberated into every aching muscle of his body. Muffled by the sound of his quick movements and the pounding in his ear, Izuku almost believed that he conjured up the sound of his voice entirely. Like the siren sound of reality beyond his comprehension. Izuku risks a glance in his direction.
Kacchan lies on his side now, completely facing the battle and gazing at him with those piercing eyes. His body is in shambles and his blood spills over onto the concrete below. Izuku’s stomach churns and he chokes on the next inhale. He is alive and looking directly at him. He looks like he might call out his name again, but then thinks better of it. Even with his chest cavity splintered and exposed, Kacchan looks at him with an unbridled determination. Everyone else on the battlefield fades in this single moment. Hyperaware of the uncanny position of his arm and the All Might playing card resting just next to his form. The scene before him engrains itself into his very being. A prized token of the symbol of peace, covered in the blood spilling from his symbol of victory. Both the symbols, however cherished throughout the years, can only watch from an unreachable distance as the battle unfolds.
Wordlessly, Izuku interprets the exchange of glances. Izuku must give it all, or this is it.
Physically ripping his eyes away from the scene, he returns his attention to Shigaraki to only see the smirk displayed only for Izuku. He knows what he has done, and he awaits Izuku’s reaction. The smugness only grows in the face of Izuku’s distraught appearance. His actions towards Kacchan were intentional, exclusively to provoke his protective nature. Izuku knows this. Even with the logic of the situation clearly on display, Izuku cannot be so easily swayed to analyze the situation. If anything, Shigraki’s malicious assault is all the more reason that he is the one to blame for Kacchan’s agony. He knew the scene of Kacchan lying lifeless beside his feet would provoke him, and in all honesty, it is working. The coursing of electricity through his veins and into the open air fueled by the rising anguish in his heart. Anger can be a great source of power, if he remembers to control his heart. Resuming a fighting stance, Izuku treads forward viciously before a pause. A brief moment of Kacchan’s smug demeanor as he marched forward across the wood plank above a river, and the consequential fall. Moving without thinking, Izuku rushes towards his side. Kacchan maintained composure and rejected his hand offering assistance, but his face revealed a different story. Even through the smugness, the exterior of a fighting spirit, Izuku could see the pain hidden beneath the surface.
It is the same pain presented to him now, as Shigaraki maintains his ground. A distraught child dismissed and cast aside for a destructive power bestowed upon him, beyond his control. A pawn in the grander scheme of All For One to maintain power through manipulation. Another moment of pause, as his next action must be decisive. Izuku is not simply a perpetrator of violence for victory. At his core, the driving motivation behind every long night of training, every battle he has fought and won, is the same.
Save to win. He will save Shigaraki.