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You stood under the moonlight on what was once the battlements of Erebor. The chill in the air caused the hair on your arms to raise up. The nights were getting cold and you felt for the people of Lake Town, their homes destroyed due to the actions the dwarves you travelled with. You looked behind you towards the light coming up from the treasury where the dwarves still searched for the cursed Arkenstone. The stupid gem that caused Thorin to change, to become so cold that the winter chill on the air was warmer. You turned back around when a shadow moved against the glare of the fire. You had a feeling that it could only be one dwarf.
“Why are you up here alone?” Thorin’s deep voice came from behind you. He soon stepped up beside you in the clothing he had adorned. You thought he looked ridiculous and he had tried to get you to wear different clothing but you refused. Your refusal had him turning stone faced and you were worried that you had made a massive misstep.
“I needed some fresh air,” you responded eyes still staring at the moon. You could feel Thorin’s gaze on you, you steeled yourself for the cold look that was permanently there. You missed the look of fire and promise that was in them when you met him.
You turned to meet his gaze and your breath left your lungs as you saw the look in his blue eyes. They were alight with a look of wonder, the fire from before was there again as was the look of fondness. His face had grown soft as he gazed at you in the moonlight.
“My love,” he reached out brushing some of your hair behind your ear. “I had almost forgotten how you shine in the moonlight.” You smiled and leant your head into his palm where he had cupped your cheek. He leant forward and kissed your lips softly.
“Thorin,” You whispered leaning your forehead against his. You had heard from Balin that Thorin had moments like this, moments when the Dragon sickness was gone, you wished you knew how to keep it gone. The other dwarves stepped on eggshells around him, even Dwalin. You knew if anything was to be done it would be you to do it. Thorin needed to come back, the people of Lake Town would come eventually for what was promised and this Thorin wouldn’t keep his word. You needed the true Thorin, King Under the Mountain back.
“My King,” you started. Even before Erebor you had called him that, at first it was a teasing thing and once your relationship changed it became less teasing and more loving. “Would you take a walk with me in the Moonlight?” Thorin looked around and you feared the moment of clarity had gone but his lips still smiled and his eyes still held the love of a lifetime in them when he looked at you.
“It would be my honour to escort my Queen,” Thorin offered you his elbow, you softly chuckled and placed your hand in the crock of it. He walked across the top of the battlement and down to the broken doorway, they had started to fill it in with rocks but had stopped for the night to continue the search for the Arkenstone.
He lifted you up onto the rocks there and followed up behind you. Without asking he lifted you up and carried you bridal style across the rocks before setting you down. He jumped down and turned to face you. He placed his large, strong hands around your waist and lifted up and down from the rocks. The display of strength had you flustered, as it always did. Thorin aways lifted and carried you with ease. This time he grabbed hold of your hand, interlocking your fingers together. You smiled up at him and moved close to his side. There was no particular direction or destination as the two of you walked but you noticed Thorin becoming more like himself the further you got from the entrance to Erebor.
“This land was once bountiful with flowers and green grass and trees,” Thorin started, his voice full of sorrow and loss.
“Perhaps one day it will heal, now that Smaug is dead,” you suggested. “Perhaps…the people of Lake Town can rebuild Dale and assist with growing the fields?” It was a risk to mention the people of Lake Town but you figured it was better to dive head long into your plan, Thorin always did prefer straight forward conversations.
Thorin’s steps faltered but he didn’t stop, you watched his face closely looking for the dragon sickness coming back. You couldn’t see any sign of it but you knew it could come back with no warning. Instead, you could see him looking towards the ruin of Dale and around at the barren landscape.
“They would need help with Dale,” Thorin murmured. “Supplies, gold to purchase supplies and aid.”
“They would,” you nodded. “However, rebuilding Dale would be to the benefit of Erebor as well. Trade would come back from both Dwarf and Men, allowing Erebor to flourish.” Thorin did stop walking at that and turned to look at you.
“And I suppose you think we should give the gold and supplies and work force to them?” he demanded, his eyes slowly becoming cold again. You removed your hand from his and faced him as well.
“You gave them your word that they would have a share,” your tone had hardened preparing for the fight you knew was coming. The mention of gold was a mistake but there was no way to talk about Dale and the people of Lake Town without mentioning the promise of gold. “Thorin Oakenshield keeps his word, or at least I thought you did. I thought you were honourable.”
“I am King of Erebor!” Thorin roared. “I am honourable.”
“If you were you wouldn’t be blocking the gates, you would have sent word to the people of the Lake Town that they had a place in the Halls when Lake Town was destroyed,” you shouted right back. You had never backed down from an argument not even with Thorin, it was one of the things that he had said had drawn him to you, that had made him slowly fall in love. He had said a King needs a partner that challenges him, and a Durin needs someone to knock some sense into them. “You are no longer the Dwarf I fell in love with Thorin, this mountain and the cursed gold have changed you. You are becoming the very thing you feared!”
Thorin took a threatening step towards you growling and with fists clenched, and for the first time since knowing him you felt a flash of fear at the look in his face. You took a step back, your hand going to your side to rest near the hilt of your blade. Thorin paused, a voice in the back of his head cried out in anguish at seeing that look on your face, a look he swore he would never let adorn your face.
“Thorin Oakenshield, is the King Under the Mountain, the Dwarf standing in-front of me is no such thing,” You continued, regardless of the risk to yourself you knew that you had to try to get through to Thorin, for the sake of the Company and Erebor but most importantly for his own sake. The Thorin at the start of this journey would be ashamed and would never forgive himself, although it is not his fault. “The Dwarf I love is not standing before me but I know you are in there and I know you would not allow the people of Lake Town to starve or be without shelter.”
You wanted desperately to look away from his eyes, cold as they were but forced yourself to stare him down. You believed that if you backed down even the slightest you wouldn’t be able to break through to him. Thorin felt a voice echoing in his head as he stared into your bright fierce eyes, though he could still see the fear in them. Fear that he had placed there. He fell to his knees and grabbed his head, feeling the crown on his head he ripped it off and threw it to the side. His fingers gripped his hair as he yelled, cursing in dwarfish. You stood there unsure of what to do, your heart was pounding and the fear had left when Thorin yelled, it sounded like he was in so much pain. That sound pulled at your heart, you wanted nothing more than to pull him to you and sooth him. You gasped when Thorin looked up at you, his blue eyes so clear and bright, they were no longer cold but rather full of pain.
“My love,” he whispered, tears filling his eyes before they fell down his cheeks. “What have I done? Please forgive me for putting such a look into your eyes.”
That was enough for you, you took two steps towards him and wrapped your arms around his shoulders he leant his forehead against your stomach, his arms gently come up around your waist. You threaded a hand through his hair as you lent down and placed as kiss to the top of his head.
“My King, you are already forgiven,” you whispered feeling your own tears start to fall. “I am merely glad to have you back. As I know your nephews and the rest of the company would be as well.”
Thorin nuzzled into your stomach his tears continued to wet the shirt you wore. You tightened your hold on him and kissed his head again, before releasing him. You placed your hand under his chin and raised his head. His eyes were stormy with guilt, tears continuing to well and fall from them but he did not look away from you.
“You are too good for me,” Thorin looked up at you in wonder, he slowly stood up taking hold of your hand and placing a kiss on your knuckles. “I will spend the rest of my life working to be worthy of your love.”
“Thorin, my King, you need not do that,” you tugged on his jacket, pursing your lips. Thorin grinned, a chuckle leaving him as he leant down and kissed you softly. His hands gentle on your waist, pulled you closer. You pulled away leaning your forehead against his and rubbed your noses together. “We should get back, and perhaps tell the others they can stop looking…” you trailed off unsure if you could mention the Arkenstone.
“The Arkenstone can stay lost, I have no need for it anymore,” Thorin said.
“Oh?” You asked, a small part of you didn’t know if he truly meant that.
“Of course,” Thorin nodded. “I have no need for a stone when I have you, my true Arkenstone.”
You smiled; cheeks flushed with more then just the cold. You knew what the stone meant to the Dwarves, the right to rule, the kings jewel.
“I’m your right to rule?” you teased untangling yourself from him and walking back towards Erebor.
“Of course, my Queen, without you I would have been trapped in the sickness, and I would have brought further ruin upon my people,” Thorin’s voice held no teasing tone. You stopped and turned to face him. The light from the moon seemed to shine down onto him. “You brought me back, made me see. I believe you will keep me on track, although I cannot ask that-”
“You need not ask, your people are my people Thorin,” you said. “And like to you told me, a Durin needs someone to knock some sense in to them.”
Thorin joined you as you continued the journey back to Erebor. He stopped and looked back towards the ruins of Dale.
“Tomorrow we will go to the people of Lake Town and invite them to Erebor, and discuss the restoration of both Erebor and Dale,” snow started to fall landing on his black hair as he looked back at you. “The people of Lake Town will not be without shelter during the winter that is to come.”
“My King,” you reached out for him. “I am glad you are back.”
He carried you across the rocks blocking the entrance. This time he didn’t put you back down but carried you to the room that he had decided was his own. You giggled wrapping your arms around his shoulders and placing a kiss on his cheek.