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"Hey, you're still alive, right?"
The first thing Teruki became aware of was the loud ringing in his ears. Then, the pain came like a wave, crashing into his entire body. He tried to open his eyes but quickly shut them, tears welling up from how much they stung. In moving his head his cheek scraped against the concrete, and tiny chunks stuck to his skin. He felt utterly drained - physically, psychically, and emotionally.
"Oh, you're awake?" The voice sounded vaguely familiar but Teruki was in too much pain to figure out who it belonged to. He tried to signal he could hear them with what little energy he had. "Damn, he really did a number on you."
The mention of 'him' led to Teruki slowly recalling why he was here. This hadn't been an accident, he had been in a fight. With...
"Hey, you shouldn't be moving that fast, you haven't had time to recover." Teruki was pushing himself onto his knees. Something slid off his back as he sat up, but his eyes were still shut as he moved. He touched his cheek and felt the dried blood, wincing. He probably looked terrible.
"Wh..." his voice was hoarse, and his throat hurt just from breathing. He tried again, "Where did he go?"
"Ritsu's brother? Yeah I'm not sure, but the storm died down a while ago so something must've happened." The person moved and picked up the thing that had been on his back and tossed it into his lap. Teruki ran his hands over it and realized it was an article of clothing - a jacket maybe? "Uh I don't know if you realize this but you are completely naked." Teruki nodded, not sure how else to respond - he might've made a joke about it if he had more energy. "Okay, well we need to get you to a hospital or something, your injuries look serious."
"Shou-kun?" Teruki finally pieced together where he had heard the voice before. He faced where the voice had been coming from and again attempted to open his eyes. They were open for only a few seconds before he had to close them again, the stinging coming back in full force. All he was able to see was a blurry figure with a shock of red hair standing against the grey sky.
"Yeah?"
"So it is you. Sorry, I don't think I can see very well right now." Teruki clenched the jacket in his lap tightly. "Are you hurt?"
"I'll live, I didn't take the brunt of his attacks. My pops was here but they picked him back up already - he got hurt pretty bad, too." Teruki was vaguely aware of Shou's situation and assumed the 'they' had something to do with his dad's prison sentence. Strange - they sent Suzuki to stop Kageyama? Speaking of which...
"He stopped...?"
Shou hesitated for a moment before responding, either to figure out what Teruki meant or to choose his words carefully. "I think so. I don't know how or why, but he stopped."
"And the civilians...?"
"Oh yeah, most are fine, a few minor injuries here and there. I found you because of your little light show - pretty impressive maintaining that while unconscious." Teruki didn't care much for the compliment - he had just done what he could.
"I..." he didn't know where to begin. His body still hurt all over and he barely had the energy to sit up. He wanted to ask more questions, to jump up and go running towards Kageyama, but he could only sit there. He sighed and tied the jacket around his waist, overwhelmed by his powerlessness.
Shou shifted and Teruki heard the distant footsteps of two people approach them.
"Hanazawa-kun...? Oh. There was no doubt. That was Kageyama's voice.
Teruki thought maybe he was hearing things, still delirious from the fight, but Shou wasn't saying anything. He must've been just as shocked by the boy's reappearance as Teruki was.
"Ah, Shou-kun, too."
"Hey, you two." Reigen was with him. "There's a hospital nearby that wasn't hit, we're taking civilians in the area to it, you should come with us."
Teruki listened intently, relying on his hearing instead of sight for the time being. Kageyama and Reigen stopped a few feet from him and Shou. Teruki remained motionless, again unsure of what to do. It was too soon.
"Master..."
"Mm?" There was shuffling, whispers were exchanged between the two. Teruki could make out Reigen's responses better then Kageyama's soft spoken assertions. "Well, yeah I can see that ... Why don't you talk to him? ... What's the worst that could happen?" The whispers stopped and Kageyama stepped closer. Teruki pushed down the rising anxiety in his chest - now was not the time.
"Hanazawa-kun, Shou-kun..." There was the sound of sudden movement from Kageyama, causing Teruki to flinch, but when nothing changed he wasn't sure what had happened. "I'm terribly sorry for the pain I caused both of you. There is no excuse for what I did. I was... going through something but I'm... I need to take responsibility for this. I... I'm so sorry." Kageyama slightly stumbled through his words, like there was more to say but he wasn't sure how to say it. His voice also sounded hoarse - had he been crying? At some point while he was speaking Teruki realized the noise he had made was because he had moved to bow deeply towards them. Teruki didn't know how to respond, thankfully Shou spoke up before he did.
"What happened?"
"Uhm, like, before or...?"
"What caused this?" Shou paused, then quickly added, "Who stopped it?"
"Mob was in an accident and momentarily lost control of his powers." For some reason, Reigen responded instead of Kageyama. "He was able to calm down after I spoke with him." Teruki could tell from the clipped responses that Reigen was keeping things hidden. There was a lot he wasn't telling them.
"Mmm, I don't... I didn't lose control." Kageyama quietly corrected him.
"Well your... restraint was lifted, how's that sound?"
"Yeah." Kageyama shifted his weight and sighed.
Teruki was barely able to follow due to the pain he was in, but he still held onto every word. He had been unable to get Kageyama to so much as say a single word earlier, so to now be able to hear from him felt like the most important thing in the world.
He wasn't sure what Kageyama meant by not losing control and was somewhat scared to ask about it. "Hanazawa-kun." Teruki almost jumped, feeling like Kageyama had somehow read his mind. "Thank you for waking me up."
"Huh?"
"When you... When you were calling my name, I woke up. Or, I mean, the me you know woke up." Teruki tried to process what he meant but stopped when Kageyama continued speaking. "Shou-kun, thank you for stopping your father."
"Oh, you really did see that huh..." Shou kicked a rock near him and it flew off into the distance.
"I just left Ritsu - he's in the hospital, too. I think you should go visit him." Teruki almost gasped at the implication - Kageyama had fought his own brother? He tried to school his response as Kageyama did not sound proud of this fact.
"O-oh, yeah? And how is he...?" Teruki could tell Shou had realized the same thing as him and was hesitant, but still wanted to learn more.
"He's okay. I don't think he had any injuries, he's just really tired." The fear that had fallen on the two of them lifted. "We... spoke for a long time." Kageyama left the implications of this in the air, either as a way of clearing his name or as an invitation to ask more. Neither took him up on the offer.
"How did it go?" Teruki blurted out, suddenly remembering what was supposed to happen today. He realized how vague he sounded and quickly corrected himself. "With Tsubomi-chan I mean. Did you get to confess?"
"Oh, yeah I did." Kageyama paused, and Teruki could tell he was about to say something he didn't like. "She turned me down."
"Ah..." Teruki looked down. "I'm sorry about that, but I'm glad you were able to do it."
"Mmm..." he merely hummed in response, clearly still sore from rejection. Teruki decided not to push it anymore.
"Well, let's get going." Reigen leaned down to offer Teruki a hand and Shou moved towards the two. Teruki took his hand and stood up on shaking legs. He could barely stand and Reigen seemed to realize this as he helped him further lean into him. "Kid, open your eyes, or you won't know where to step."
Teruki hummed, "Ah, my eyes are a little messed up right now. Can you lead me, please?" Reigen simply grunted in response and pulled him a little closer.
"Hanazawa-kun," Kageyama said his name in such a way that everyone stopped. "I want to talk to you, too. But only once you feel better. Please come to the hospital with us."
Teruki laughed lightly, "I wasn't going to go anywhere else." He would be lying if he said he wasn't a little scared of what this meant.
"Okay, good."
Teruki was laying in the hospital bed, the gentle beeping of the machines at his bedside filled the room. He wasn't alone; due to the large scale damage, every room had at least one patient and many had more. He was actually in the same room as Kageyama's little brother, but neither were in the state of mind to speak. Ritsu had already spoke with Shou earlier, and now Shou was out in the city helping clean things up.
Kageyama helped him get to the hospital, but didn't say much. He hovered nearby constantly, but with Teruki's poor eyesight he was never able to get a good look at how Kageyama was fairing. He seemed to fret over Ritsu much more, as the moment they wheeled Teruki into the same room as him, Kageyama was at his bedside asking how he was feeling. Teruki thought it made sense, but couldn't help feeling a little hurt by the lack of concern for his well being. Reigen had to help him into the hospital bed and adjust it so that he could relax. Kageyama stopped by his bedside on their way out but didn't say anything. Ritsu also had said very little since he entered the room.
"He said he's going to talk to you." Well scratch that, looks like the little brother does want to talk.
"Mmhmm, he told me."
"Hanazawa-kun..." Ritsu trailed off. If either of them had the strength, they would probably get up and pull back the curtains separating them so they weren't just talking to the air around them. "I heard about what happened from him. I want to warn you, my brother is different now."
"Different?" Teruki turned to face Ritsu's side of the room.
"I don't... know exactly what happened, but I know what happened before this, and how he has been acting... He's different." Ritsu didn't sound scared or upset, but at the same time Teruki couldn't discern what he did sound like.
"Is that bad?"
"Who's to say? We all change..." Teruki still very much wanted to know if Ritsu thought it was bad. "He's going to tell you about it, though, so be prepared."
"Well, now I'm even more scared." Teruki tried to lighten the mood and laugh a little, though what he said was the truth. Ritsu seemed to understand that it was a half joke half truth, but he didn't laugh.
"That's okay, but he might also be scared of you." Teruki laughed fully at that, it was ironic.
"Well, I am his rival!" Despite his tiredness, he still gave some bravado to his special relationship with Kageyama.
"That's not what I mean. There's more things to be scared of in life then just psychic powers."
"Oh." With that, their short and somewhat strange conversation ended.
Kageyama continued to return every few hours, seemingly unable to be gone very long without checking on his brother. He explained that his absences was due to him going out to help with the clean up, like Shou had. It had long since gotten dark outside, and so search parties had begun to fill the broken streets of the city. There was a TV in their room that had the news of what was happening playing, but neither could stomach watching it for very long. Likewise, both ensured it was turned off whenever Kageyama would return. It was very strange, seeing the extensive damage, and then having the person responsible walk in and fret over their health. Ritsu seemed more accustomed to it, though.
"How are you feeling?" It was probably the 7th time Teruki had heard him ask that today. Ritsu responded kindly - his energy was already coming back. At some point Kageyama had confessed that he could just transfer his energy to both of them, but was a little worried he might give them too much. Teruki was reminded of how Reigen had said his 'restraint was lifted.'
"And you, Hanazawa-kun?" Kageyama was looking at him, still at Ritsu's bedside, but, with the curtain pulled back, he could easily see him.
"I'm also doing better. My eyesight is returning, I can tell you two apart now." He laughed, because it was true. If not for knowing that Ritsu was the one in the bed, he had not been able to tell the two blurry boys apart.
"Your powers?"
"Oh, yeah," he lifted the tv remote to show they were returning. He was about to make a comment on not needing them but instead bit his lip. For him to even ask about Teruki's powers was strange. The 'different' Kageyama seemed to have changed his perspective on powers.
"That's good." Each time Kageyama had returned, Hanazawa had mentally prepared himself to speak with the boy. However, each time he would simply excuse himself after talking to Ritsu for a while and hadn't brought up talking to him again. He swallowed his nerves and decided to bring it up himself.
"Uhm, when did you want to talk to me?" Teruki was worried about what Kageyama wanted to say, but he also wanted to know more about this 'different' Kageyama.
"Oh right, well..." He looked at Ritsu, who shrugged as if to say 'I don't mind.' He turned back to Teruki and tilted his head a little. "Can you walk?"
"Honestly haven't tried," he laughed a little, "but if not I still have the wheelchair they brought me in on." Teruki sat up and scooted towards the side of the bed. He placed his feet into the slippers left at his bedside and attempted to stand up. It didn't go very well.
"Wait, wait, let me help." Kageyama quickly walked over and brought the wheelchair closer. He also leaned close so that Teruki could use him to balance better. They managed to get Teruki into the wheelchair and Kageyama told Ritsu they'd be right back before wheeling him into the hallway.
They didn't say anything as he silently brought Teruki to the elevator and rode it down a few levels with him. He brought him into what seemed to be a small cafeteria, though no one else was around. They moved to a small table and he sat across from Teruki. He didn't speak for a moment, looking around the room and occasionally looking at Teruki, who remained still as he stared at Kageyama.
"What did you want to talk about?" Teruki prompted him.
"What happened." He said it so calmly it's like they had a small disagreement, not a fight that put the other in the hospital.
"You already apologized, it's okay." Teruki leaned back a little, relaxing a bit. "I understand what happened, it happened before. You weren't fully in control, accidents are bound to happen."
"You're wrong." Kageyama looked at him, his blank expression seemingly on the verge of changing. "That's what I want to talk about. I was in control, or, part of me was." Teruki felt his body tense up again. "The person who attacked you in the woods, that was me."
"Eh?" Teruki smiled uncomfortably, unsure if Kageyama was joking or not. "I-It was your body yes but you... That wasn't you - you don't use your powers on others, right?" Kageyama sighed, and Teruki could tell he had said the wrong thing.
"It was me. It was a part of me, now all of me... It's difficult to explain..." While never one to shy away from eye contact, Kageyama was having a difficult time looking at Teruki. "The side of me you've seen, at your school when we met, and today, those were me. I..." He fidgeted with his fingers. "I am trying to accept myself. I realized today I haven't been doing a good job of that. I want to acknowledge all parts of myself, even if those parts hurt others."
"But the energy from that person... they were... different." Teruki was struggling to understand how to reconcile these two vastly different people into one person. If what Kageyama was saying was true, had this different person become Kageyama? Or will they come out again later? More frequently? No wonder Ritsu had warned him, he was becoming confused and slightly overwhelmed by his many questions.
"I messed up, Hanazawa-kun. I repressed part of myself, I denied who I am so that I wouldn't hurt anyone. But to deny myself like that... It came back out in unintended ways." Kageyama made a pained expression, eyes squinting at nothing in particular. "Hanazawa-kun, psychic powers don't make you special, but they don't make you bad either. To hide that part of ourselves isn't healthy."
Teruki blinked, and continued to listen intently. The idea of hiding his psychic powers had never occurred to him, but this talk seemed more about airing out Kageyama's feelings then lecturing Teruki on his perspective.
"So that was you."
"Yes." Kageyama sat up straighter, trying to look serious. He was truly trying hard to accept all his faults and still hold his head up high. He faltered a bit. "But at that moment it wasn't the me you know." He shook his head. "Like I said it's hard to describe, I just want us to be on the same page." Teruki nodded slowly.
"I remember what you said to me..." He continued as he absentmindedly scratched at his cheek, recalling a memory they shared. "I'm an average person, right?" Teruki almost winced - he remembered. What had been said in a playful boast had clearly been taken badly in the moment. "Part of me was offended... I know what you meant but to say that to me while in that state... It frustrated me."
Teruki could hear what he wasn't saying out loud - 'I'm not average.' Not that he's more special then others, or bad, or anything else. Just that his power is what's not average, and he had been denying that fact for such a long time.
"When we first met I said that without our powers we would be empty, but not having powers - that's not who we are." To illustrate his point, he made the napkin holder on the table float slightly. It was uncharacteristic of him to use his powers for something so small. "It's pointless to talk about who we might be without our powers because it doesn't change the fact that right now, we do have powers. Who we are is shaped by that. To deny our powers existence is to deny parts of ourselves." The napkin holder gently landed back on the table with a soft thud. "At least, that's what I believe now."
"Wow..." Yet again, Kageyama seems to be five steps ahead of Teruki. He felt utterly amazed by him - not for the first time in their friendship and not for the last time. "You really have changed."
"Yes, but also, I'm who I was always supposed to be." He gave a small smile at that, like it was an inside joke for him only. "I probably sound a little weird, but I'm being honest about how I feel."
"No, you're making sense... I think." Teruki smiled sheepishly. Truthfully it was a lot to follow but he wanted Kageyama to know he was there to listen. "It..." Teruki faltered, unsure if he should share how he was feeling or if he should let Kageyama continue to speak.
"Mmm?" Kageyama caught his hesitation and pushed him forward.
"I... I don't know if I should even say this, but..." Teruki rubbed his neck, and felt embarrassment rise in him. "It was scary. Really scary. But I was thinking during the fight... Is that how you saw me?"
"No," Kageyama didn't miss a beat, and his bluntness left Teruki reeling a bit. "You're not scary, but that's because I'm me. I said when we met if I was anyone else someone could be hurt. I don't know if I will ever understand what it's like to be on the other side of my powers." He paused. Teruki realized that truly the only person whose power Kageyama seemed scared of was his own. "I'm sorry I scared you. I was angry at everyone and myself but that didn't make it okay." Although he had apologized earlier, for some reason this apology hit Teruki a little harder. Maybe it was because he now knew more about what Kageyama was experiencing.
"It's okay." He felt a little lame responding so simply, but he didn't know what else to say, still digesting all the new information. "How... how are you feeling?"
"Uhm..." Kageyama seemed a little surprised by the question, and wasn't sure what to say. "I don't know. I'm still working through some things."
"Okay..."
"I'm different now, but I still want to be friends." Kageyama slowly put his hand between the two of them, hesitant for a reason unknown to Teruki.
"Of course!" Teruki enthusiastically took his hand and shook it. "You're still you, I can tell! I just need to learn a little bit more about this other side of you." Teruki did his best to give a genuine smile to calm the other. He had clearly been through a lot. "I'm glad we met each other, Kageyama-kun."
"Me too." Kageyama smiled. A deep, genuine smile that was brighter then any smile Teruki had ever seen from him. It seems it wasn't just his perspective on powers that had changed.
"So..." Teruki looked to the side. "What really happened with Tsubomi-chan?"
Kageyama sputtered, blush rising to his cheeks. "Well! Um!"
Teruki laughed - no matter the change, he was still a bashful person at heart.