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When Shigeo approaches the waking world, he does so slowly and gently with the whispering vestiges of a dream slipping from his mind, like sand between his fingers. He does not startle awake, merely blinks his bleary eyes open and stares up at the ceiling. It’s still dark outside, the city’s faint streetlights stubbornly peeking out from behind the set of curtains Shigeo brought from his old apartment. His fingers curl and grasp the cream colored duvet draped over him, recalling his mother helping him pick it out. However, the mattress and the nightstand perched beside the bed were not once his. Those belonged to the man sleeping beside him.
Shigeo carefully turns onto his side, his eyes now adjusted to the dark, and finds Teruki sound asleep. He’s sprawled on the bed in a victory pose, his cheek squished against the pillow, which makes Shigeo smile softly. His shoulders draw up and down with each breath, peaceful and relaxed. He resists the urge to trace the faint scars that are scattered across his torso like stars in the night sky, not wanting to wake him up. Teruki is a light sleeper, for reasons that break his heart to think about. A childhood filled with fear and hope, grief and determination. No, it’s best to just let him sleep.
He can’t quite manage to stop himself from tucking a stray strand of coarse blonde hair out of his eyes, however. It’s getting long, and he’s made mention of it before, but it doesn’t seem like Teruki has any interest in cutting it anytime soon. Shigeo doesn’t mind, it suits him. The esper hums in his sleep, leaning into his light touch, a smile curling on his lips. Something sharp and fierce, yet warm and tender fills his heart.
Shigeo loves him. He truly, unequivocally loves him so very much.
It took a long time for him to realize that simple truth. Far too long, but then again, emotions have never been Shigeo’s forte. Despite it all, Teruki was patient and understanding. He waited, even when Shigeo doubted that he could ever love like this, he still waited for him. When Teruki doubted himself, doubted that he deserves something as good, as pure, as amazing as this, Shigeo was kind and gentle, and showed him how much he does.
Teruki can be arrogant, lose his temper, and jump into danger headfirst without asking for help. Shigeo can be closed off, shut down, and refuse to burden others with how he feels. They have their flaws, there’s no denying that. Yet, Shigeo sees Teruki for who he is. He sees how hard he’s trying every single day to be better, to help other people, to be there for the kids and for his friends. That is why he fell for him. He’s not perfect, no one is, but he’s determined to change and improve. He never gives up, and Shigeo admires that about him.
It’s been… gosh, it’s been almost two years already. Two years since Shigeo realized how much Teruki meant to him, how much he wanted to be at his side. As Shigeo lays here, in the dead of night, another day with this wonderful man just around the corner, he thinks… He wonders what it would be like to always be at Teruki’s side. A thought like that would have frightened him years ago. He never would have imagined it even being possible.
Things are different now. He’s different. His life has changed so much, and he couldn’t be more grateful. For so long, he wasn’t living. Time had crawled past him agonizingly slow, day after day, the same again and again. He never thought his life would amount to anything, too afraid to venture into the unknown, too scared of what he would do if he lost control. His days were filled with monotonous routines, nothing new or thrilling. These past few years have been filled with so much joy and passion and excitement. He finally feels alive. It’s thanks to the wonderful people he’s encountered and who have helped him, who showed him there’s more to life than office jobs and his old apartment.
Teruki was one of those people, and he continues to bring so much vibrancy, happiness, and warmth in his day to day life. There are times when Shigeo just wants to hold his hand and never let go. To watch sunsets and sunrises together, to travel and see the world, to make him laugh again and again, to kiss him until they can no longer breathe, to hold him in his arms and feel safe. He never wants to stop making memories with him, precious and incredible moments that they can share and cherish.
Shigeo loves him, and he has a feeling he always will.
He watches him with so much fondness, affection swirling in his chest as he holds Teruki’s outstretched hand. He gently presses his lips to his ring finger, and the thought comes unexpectedly, but inevitably, ‘I want to marry him.’
Bound to happen it might have been, but still completely unbidden, and it sends his heart into a somersault. His powers simmer beneath his skin with the intensity of his sudden emotions, and they find an outlet somewhere. His face goes red upon seeing the little sprouts in the clay pot sitting on the windowsill were now fully grown pink and white colored begonias. They were a gift from Kurosaki, and weren’t expected to bloom for another week or two. Oops.