Archive of Our Own ^beta

Chapter Text

Donnie groaned, rubbing his hands over his face. He looked at his coffee mug as his vision blurred slightly. He needed sleep, not coffee.

But he couldn't sleep, not at the moment. He had tried, believe him, but his brain was determined to finish this before he got a wink of sleep and kept him staring at the ceiling for three hours before he gave up.

If you ask him, that was three hours uselessly wasted. 

He looked back at the coding in front of him. It should be so simple! It was merely an upgrade to the security in the surrounding sewer system. It shouldn't take more than thirty minutes to finish, and then he could sleep. It was bothering him, and anytime something was bothering him, he couldn't eat. He felt hungry and nauseous, never a good combination.

but no, his accursed brain was not only denying him much-needed sleep, but also the functionality. He had already maxed out on coffee and could barely see straight, let alone type out a straightforward code. He blinked groggily, so tired that he didn't even hear the lab door open, or the footsteps approaching.

"Donnie?" He nearly jumped out of his shell at the voice that shot through his ears. 

welp, add a noise sensitivity and headache to the growing list of things wrong with his body at that moment. 

"Woah, calm down, it's just me." Leo set a hand on Donnie's shoulder as the startled turtle took a deep breath and locked his fingers behind his neck. 

"Sorry."

"when's the last time you slept?" Leo set his hands on the desk beside Donnie as the younger blinked again, slowly, at the text in front of him. 

"mmm... what day is it?"

"Tuesday."

Donnie wracked his brain for the events of the past few days. 

He needed to update the security...

"I think Thursday... but I've gotten a couple of naps."

Leo took his own deep breath, thoughtfully watching his brother's slouched form. Leo knew of Donnie's issues when he was like this, and despite disapproving of the abysmal self-care, also understood that there wasn't much he could do about it.

Understanding didn't make it any easier for Leo to watch his younger brother run himself ragged time and time again. 

"How much do you have left to do?"

Donnie inhaled deeply. "Not much but I-" He rested his forehead on the cool metal surface of the desk "I can't think or focus on it."

"hmm." Leo leaned over Donnie's shoulder, looking at the screen. "What does it do?"

"It's an upgrade for the lairs security." Donnie leaned back in his seat. 

Leo nodded. "is there anything I can do to help?"

Donnie thought for a moment, his head beginning to pound. 

the ringing in his ears didn't help, and it was so loud that he wondered if Leo could also hear it.

Leo shot straight up, looking around as the dimmed LEDs of the lab switched to a harsh, blinking red. "What the hell-"

Donnie blinked, looking around. a realization dawned on him far slower than it should have. "The alarm."

"Alarm for what?"

"Code three security breach." Donnie ran his eyes over his screen, realizing that he had the computer muted and there had been two notifications for proximity alerts not a few minutes ago. "Shit-"

"What's code three?" Leo asked.

"It means we need to get off our asses and prepare for either a fight or a lost homeless man." Donnie pushed himself up, fighting the wave of nausea that washed over him, and grabbing his bo from where it was leaning against his desk. 

Leo ran ahead to the pit and Donnie heard him shout a couple things, most likely to their other two brothers. 

Donnie exited, scanning the area as the red light continued to flash and GOD, WHY WERE THEY SO BRIGHT! Donnie swallowed the bile that had risen in his throat and joined his brothers as they glared defensively at the turnstiles. 

"Donnie!" Raph turned his attention to the younger turtle. "Can you turn off that racket?!"

Donnie nodded, pulling out his T-Phone and typing a few remote commands into it. 

then there was silence. Donnie breathed a sigh of relief, relishing in the quiet, before remembering that they may have been found. Maybe the Krang were back, or worse...

Donnie shook his head at the thought, swaying slightly. 

"Dude, you don't look too good." Mikey furrowed his mask in worry, pressing his palm to Donnie's forehead. "You're burning up!"

"What?" Leo hissed.

"Donatello." Donnie turned to see his father standing behind him. Splinter put a hand on his shoulder, and positioned him more in the center of the group, not allowing their gazes to break. "My sons, what was the alarm for?"

"Someone's coming." Raph pointed at the lair entrance. "but no one's come yet."

"I see." Splinter finally broke his stare to look at the turnstiles.

the silence continued for what seemed like an hour, but might have only been a minute.

then came a god-awful screeching sound, like nails on a chalkboard, but turned up to max volume as it echoes around the space. Splinter folded his ears down and flinched as all the brothers tensed, gripping their weapons tightly. 

Splinter did not remove his hand from Donnie's shoulder. 

there was another expanse of silence before footsteps could be heard in a calm, constant rythym, growing louder as they got closer. Something about it was unsettling to Donnie, making his metaphorical hair stand on end. 

the entrance blurred in his vision for a second before a figure stepped out of the tunnels, covered in spit-shined metal armor.

All of the familys hearts sank.

the shredder.

Chapter Text

Leo was internally panicking. 

the shredder was here, in their home.

he'd found them.

there was no preparation and it seemed Donnie was sick.

this was bad.

Okay Leo, think. Prioritize. 

get out, get somewhere safe, somewhere hidden.

they could deal with where after they dealt with the now. 

Leo reached up and wrapped his hands around his katana handles, drawing the weapons with a SHING. His family seemed to take the hint and all fell into their own positions. Splinter had Donnie, so Leo could let him deal with that situation. He didn't think Donnie was able to think, let alone fight against the shredder. 

rushing out from behind their enemy came hoards of foot bots, spreading out on either side of their creator. they were the more advanced versions, the kind that adapted and learned as they fought. 

Well, that will make this harder.

Leo gripped his swords tighter, his nerves lighting up with sensation as all his muscles grew taut. 

"We fight our way out and run," Leo muttered quietly, leaving no room in his tone for any debate. Luckily, Raph nodded and shifted a bit. "Sensei, can you get Don out of here?"

Splinter pushed Donnie more towards Mikey. "No, my sons. You four must run, I will handle this. 

"Not alone!" Leo protested. 

Splinter considered this for a moment, watching the last of the soldier's file in as the shredder stood there, observing them. "fine, Leonardo, you take Donatello to get the Shellraiser. We will meet you at April's."

Leo was reluctant to leave. He was a strong fighter, he should stay there to fight! 

Splinter seemed to see Leo's doubt and huffed. "You are best equipped to protect your brother, now go!"

Leo swallowed nervously, but he didn't dare argue anymore.

"No! I can fight!" Donnie gripped his staff to his plastron, but a sharp clicking turned the family's attention to their enemies, who decided that was the best moment to commence their attack

"Leonardo, go!" Splinter ordered, and Raph stepped in front of his older brother to fend off an incoming bot. 

"We got this Leo!" Raph shouted, and Mikey and Splinter joined the fight as well. 

Donnie went to jump in, but Leo grabbed his forearm. "Come on Donnie!"

"But I can-"

"Just come on!" Leo half-dragged his younger brother deeper into the lair, reaching the garage and locking the door behind him. He saw Donnie's glare, the sparks of fire in his eyes, but ignored it.

they both startled at the loud crashing against the garage doors.

Leo grabbed Donnie's hand and pulled him toward the Shellraiser, which they started up and drove out of the surface exit. 

Donnie was in the passenger seat, seemingly in a bit of a huff. Leo couldn't tell if he was angry, tired, upset, or all three. it was a day out, which meant they had to stick to the backroads for the most part. it was also raining heavily.

there was a thunk on the roof of the car, and both turtles stiffened. Donnie, looking up, mumbled something under his breath.

several more thunks were heard, then the hatch that led to the roof was kicked in and a footbot jumped into the vehicle. they could still hear several thunks on the roof, which meant there was probably more. 

"Shell-" Leo tried to look back, but considering he was still driving, it was difficult. 

Donnie got up, grabbing his staff. 

"Donnie, don't-" he lost sight of his brother and heard several grunts and some crashing before Donnie poked his head back around the driver's seat. 

"We can't lead them to April." He pointed out, and Leo grunted. Of course, why hadn't he considered that? He pulled over as several more bots dropped down and Don began fighting them. 

Leo hopped up and lopped off a couple of heads.

there were still thunks on the roof. 

"How many are there?!" Leo groaned, hoisting himself up the hatch to find at least a dozen or two crouched on the roof. 

Shit-

Leo pulled himself the rest of the way up and started swinging. He pushed the remaining bots off the roof to find more crawling down the sides of the building toward him. Donnie opened the door to the Shellraiser and also recognized the situation. 

Then several of the bots pounced and stabbed their blades as deeply as they could into one of the vehicle's wheels.

the tire went flat and jolted the rest, causing Donnie to stumble a bit, catch himself in the doorway, and hop out of the car. "Leo!"

"Nearest manhole cover!" Leo sliced through all the metal he needed to get to his brother, then once again grabbed his hand and pulled him through the alley. he could hear the robotic chirps and beeps behind them, gaining ground. 

He spotted one of the covers and sped up, pulling Donnie along before sliding, flicking off the cover as quickly as he could, and having Donnie go down first despite his stubborn protests. 

they dropped into the dark sewer and ran around the nearest bend, pressing their shells against the slick sewer wall. Leo took that moment to catch his breath and compose his thoughts. because of the rain, the water was running roughly, flooding a bit so it came up to the middle of their calves. 

Leo heard the bots fall into the sewer where they'd come in and stiffened. Leo instinctually put a hand over Donnie's mouth. the younger huffed but didn't move to remove it. Leo could feel the heat radiating from Donnie's face and breath, far more than they were used to. How come he hadn't noticed that Donnie was sick before? He usually wasn't this out of it when he got focused on a task. 

Leo took another deep breath, hearing the bots drawing closer, and seeing flashes of light as they scoped the sewers with flashlights.

Donnie's breathing hitched and he leaned over a bit, removing Leo's hand and covering his own mouth as he twitched. 

Leo gave him a questioning look before realizing he was trying to stifle a cough. 

oh.

oh no.

Leo put one hand on the top of Donnie's shell as he struggled to stay quiet, and the other was moved to grip his katana handles again.

the flashlight lights he was watching didn't catch them. 

instead, they were flooded with light from behind them.

Leo turned to see a different group of bots standing behind the blinding lights.

"for the love of pizza," Leo groaned. "There's no end to you guys!"

they flashed forward, and Leo moved Donnie to behind him, drawing his katanas, and cutting down any of the robots that dared to come too close. 

Donnie coughed, then Leo heard the familiar whacking of his brother's bo staff. the original group had come up on the other side.

Leo aimed for the bot holding the flashlight, and cut off its hands, making it drop the light into the water below. 

unfortunately, the bots seemed to be good at seeing in the dark too, cause what else could go wrong?

everything.

the impact that came to his head caused him to see stars, and the following kick to the plastron sent him stumbling. he lost his footing, accidentally stepping off the raised platform on the sides of the sewer, and falling shell-first into the current below. His arms and legs scraped the bottom painfully, and he scrambled for any kind of hand-hold but found none. 

Leo tried to fight the current, but the seething hot pain coming from several parts of his body became too much, and he succumbed to the weightless darkness. 

Chapter Text

"Michelangelo, you must stay quiet." Splinter whispered. 

Mikey nodded silently, pressing his lips together in a thin line. 

they crept along in the alley towards the Shellraisers coordinates, carefully keeping an eye on their surroundings, should any of the foot, or their leader, reappear. They had gotten some kind of distress signal that they were tracking.

they had managed to get away from Shredder, but the surface had also shown to be swarming with bots. it was one big battle that they couldn't finish, not like this. 

Mikey gripped his father's sleeve, and Raph was behind him, with a hand on his shell. 

Splinter stopped, looking and listening around the corner before leading his sons into an alley across the street. there they found the vehicle, abandoned with a flat tire. They looked around, finding a collection of broken bots in and around the car, as well as a slew of scratches across the building walls, scaling up to the roof. 

"it seems they ran." Splinter pointed out. 

"yeah, no shit," Raph grumbled. 

Mikey looked up at the accending marks and pointed. "maybe they went up there."

Raph followed his gaze and squinted in the rain. "I don't think Leo would try to scale a slick building wall with a sick Donnie and a horde of foot bots after them." He looked at Mikey. "He's probably somewhere nearby, hiding." 

Mikey nodded, that sounded more right. the roofs were too open at the moment. it was better to stick to the alleys. the sewers were flooded, which was an issue.

Mikey grabbed his T-Phone and shot a text to the brothers' group chat.

M- L&D, where are you?

there was no immediate response other than Raph checking his own notification for it, and Mikey frowned. 

Splinter set his hand on Mikey's shoulder. "Come, my sons. we must keep moving."

"But Donnie and Leo-" Mikey was interrupted by familiar robotic chirps. Splinter swiftly grabbed him and Raph and ducked behind a trash can. 

"hush." The rat hissed, and both turtles stiffened. Raph put a hand on Mikey's other shoulder, and the younger reached up to grab it. he could hear his heart beating in his ears as he saw the breams of a scanner running across the alley. the scan swept closer to their hiding spot and all three instinctually curled into themselves more, trying to make themselves as small and unnoticeable as possible.

the endless seconds passed as the scanner passed around them, not able to bypass the dumpster to see them. it stopped scanning, and chirped again, its footsteps receding. 

Mikey poked his head out to look at it as it walked away. noticing the blade in its hand, he gasped.

"that's Leo's sword." He pointed out. 

Raph and splinter also peeked out to look and Raph growled. "what the hell-"

the bots head turned fully around, sharp, glowing red eyes locking onto the trio's spot before it let out a loud wail. 

"shit!" Raph grabbed Mikey's arm and helped him up as Splinter stood in front of them. 

more bots appeared and all three were forced to run again, heading more for the docks. Splinter wasn't the best swimmer, but he knew his two most emotionally driven sons would help him if need be. 

They turned sharply at the docks, winding through the maze of cargo containers as the sounds of the bots echoed around them from all directions. it made it hard for Mikey to pinpoint what direction they were coming from.

several bots jumped out in front of them, raising small rifles.

"They have GUNS?!" Raph yelled, yanking his younger brother away from where they were aiming and behind a shipping container. 

Mikey and Raph watched Splinter dive out of the way of several rounds and behind his own cover on the other side of the open area. He looked across at his children, raising a brow toward Raph. Raph was staring to the side, where the rounds had stuck in a blue container, several red fuzzy dots protruding from the side with minimal damage to the metal.

those weren't bullets...

"They've changed their strategy!" Raph voiced. "avoid getting shot!"

"Why? and I thought we already were!" Mikey gripped his forearm with both hands. 

"no idea- YEOWCH!" Raph jumped forward, scratching at his shoulder before pulling out one of those dastardly darts. 

Oh no-

seconds later, he fell to his knees, and Mikey caught him around the plastron, looking behind the pair at a bot they'd missed that had snuck up on them. it aimed its firearm at mikey, but before it could shoot, a jade stick flew into its head, shorting it out upon impact. 

Splinter wasted no time scooping up a half-concious Raph and ordering Mikey to run. 

they had to get somewhere safe, find Leo and Donnie, and somehow prevent the foot from taking over New York, and they had to do it quickly.

Mikey hoped the odds were in their favor.

Chapter Text

Leo found himself breathing. not that it was odd to be breathing, he just hadn't expected it to feel so weird...

or painful.

He wheezed, clenching his eyes closed tighter, and felt a shooting pain through his head and body when he coughed, groaning. He pressed his lips together and inhaled deeply through his nose, almost taking in some water, causing his nostrils to sting as he huffed and suppressed another cough.

He finally opened his eyes very slowly, but his vision was spotty, and wherever he was seemed fairly dark. his eyes adjusted to the minimal amount of dim light that reflected off the thin layer of water beneath him. he moved to sit up, more pain spiking in his head.

he felt drowsy and nauseous and could sense more coughing coming. 

after a minute of resistance, he gave in, nearly blinded by the pain of the wracking coughs, and incessant vomiting of water he'd inhaled. How the hell was he alive? He pushed himself further, sitting up on his knees and swallowing, attempting to sooth his now sore throat. 

he looked around, finding himself in a part of the sewer he didn't recognize. The walls were so old they were falling apart and the rest of the water around him was thick with loads of waste that clung to his body like a wet cotton shirt. 

Where was he? How did he end up here?

Think, Leonardo. what do you last remember? 

the shredder showed up at the lair, then I and Donnie ran because he was sick. we were chased back into the sewers by footbots and then...

He couldn't remember much after that, inhaling calmly as he grasped his knees with both hands. he looked around but found no signs of his brother. He did, however, spot one of his katanas nearby, and sheathed it. he'd worry about finding the other one later.

Where was Donnie? Was he okay? Were they separated?

No shit sherlock...

Leo took one more deep breath before reaching for his belt, where his T-Phone was. He pulled it up and attempted to turn it on. 

Dead.

as if his luck could get any worse. 

He sighed and moved to stand up, fighting off the dizziness of the action. He walked down the sewer, toward where he believed the light was coming from, and the tunnel got slightly more lit the further he walked. He finally found the souce of the light: a caved roof of the tunnel that led to a less old area. there was a small waterfall of water that fell from above, but he figured it'd be pretty easy to climb up.

Well, it seemed easy enough, until he fell on his ass a couple of times before barely managing to scramble up to the above tunnel. He pulled himself onto his plastron and hissed as his arms and legs dragged against the concrete, irritating the already-there scrapes. 

this may be harder than he thought it would be. 

He kept near the sewer wall as he continued through the tunnels, taking every chance he had to climb higher, despite his aching body and screaming headache. 

maybe he had a concussion? 

the thought left him just as quickly as it had come, his usually collected brain bustling with chaos and discomfort, leading to an utter lack of focus. He wanted to meditate, to calm his thoughts, but somehow was aware that if he stopped, he would not be able to keep going without a nap.

where was he going?

up, he needed to go up. 

back to the lair?

no, the shredder was there, and Leo didn't want to see what he left behind.

they were supposed to meet up somewhere.

GOD, why couldn't he think?!

Leo ran into one of the sewer walls, distracted by his own thoughts.

He blinked in surprise as his head pounded more, a single line leaking through the fog.

"We will meet you at April's."

Leo huffed. that was where he would go. Hopefully, Donnie would be there too.

He just needed to keep going. 

Breathe.

get out. Find them.

Focus.

they're depending on you.

you can't fail.

Chapter Text

Donnie first felt a combination of numbness and pain. His shoulder flared the most, but his head felt warm and fuzzy. the rest of him was cold, very cold. He slowly opened his eyes, taking in the sleek metal room he was in. it was rather small, probably not big enough for him to stand up in, so he wasn't sure that "room" was the proper word.

box?

was he in a box?

He pushed himself up with one arm, finding the other hard to move without throbbing in his shoulder. He propped himself against the wall, his brain starting up and kicking very quickly into overdrive. 

what was happening? where was he? where were his brothers? Oh no, was Leo okay? He needed to get back to them, but there were no doors in the box. was he trapped? how did he get here? The last thing he remembered was fighting off those footbots, then nothing. What happened to his shoulder then? he remembered getting the shell beat off of him by some footbots with terrible bedside manners and very slightly remembered one of them stepping on his shoulder.

he paused. He was panicking, that much was obvious based on his ragged breathing and screaming thoughts. 

he needed a goal, something he would attempt to reach. 

He needed to get back to his family, to make sure they were all safe and unharmed.

to do that, he needed to get out of this box. 

the first step would be checking for exits. if it came to an escape, he probably wouldn't get far with a hurt arm. 

he checked the rest of his body over, noting a few scrapes and bruises, but nothing that would get in the way. His headache also returned, and he noted cold chills and sweating, signaling he may still have a fever. 

He hesitantly directed his attention to his shoulder, observing the odd angle and bruising. He gently felt around the socket, coming to the conclusion that it was dislocated. 

that wasn't good, and considering he was alone, he'd need to set it himself. 

that was a terrible idea, but he could either try and fail or fail by not trying. 

He gripped his shoulder, hissing as it was jostled. He set his jaw so he wouldn't bite his tongue and took a couple of deep breaths.

Then he pulled strongly, barely able to hear the pop through his own half-hearted attempt not to scream and the brain-numbing pain that shot through his torso. 

He continued clinging to his shoulder desperately, trying to calm his ragged breathing and contain the pain. something Splinter had spouted about pain being a construct flashed through his mind and he chuckled dryly. That was some bullshit.

His legs had bent to curl up agaisnt his chest and he rested his head on them. He felt like shit, and honestly, wasn't sure he was really up to moving from his spot. his head felt heavy and his eyelids drooped. He was so tired, and everything hurt so much. 

it was awful. 

Unfortunately, things would only get worse from there.

Chapter Text

Mikey bounced his leg nervously, his gaze switching from Raphs still form on the ragged couch, to Splinter calmly meditating over by the door. they had decided to hide in an abandoned apartment building in the rougher part of town for a day. Splinter insisted that they give Leo and Donnie at least twelve hours to contact them, and he'd only gone to that from 24 because Mikey was impatient.

what if Shredder found them? Did they really have to wait ten more hours just to consider that they may be in trouble?

that was ten hours Mikey's brothers could be hurting.

Raph was still heavily sedated, and the only movement from him was the rise and fall of his plastron. They'd given their allies calls and the Mutanimals had apparently been hit by the foot too. They were all still alive, but several of them had been injured in the ambush.

Were Donnie and Leo hurt and trying to find somewhere safe so they could call their family? Donnie was already sick, so this whole situation wasn't boding well in Mikey's stomach. 

nevertheless, he obeyed. It wasn't like he had much choice. Splinter was blocking the door and Mikey didn't want to leave Raph alone. plus, if Mikey somehow got more hurt, that wouldn't help his brothers. He was already nursing an aching jaw and a malfunctioning ankle. 

so he waited.

and waited.

and waited...

Raph's phone rang on the desk beside the couch. All his bulkier gear had been set there so he would be comfortable. Mikey pounced from where he was seated, receiving a sharp reminder of his ankle injury as he favored it. he caught his balance and stood on one foot to pick up the phone, looking at the screen. 

It was Karai.

Mikey was about to answer it, but Splinter appeared and took the phone, putting it up to his ear. 

"Moshi Moshi." He greeted his daughter. Mikey stood there for a moment, a little startled by his father's interruption, but not daring to protest. He hopped to the armchair he had sat in before and sat back down, huffing. It was probably fine since he wasn't sure how well he could talk with his jaw. it still hurt.

he had hoped it would have been Leo or Donnie calling. 

Mikey tuned out Splinter's soft conversation and locked his eyes back on Raph. the only time the hothead didn't look close to exploding was when he was relaxed, watching a movie, or sleeping. 

Mikey sighed. He pulled out his own phone and pulled up his message logs. it stated that Leo's phone had been active five hours ago. that was before any of this even happened. he did have an outstanding amount of self-control.

Donnie's had been active 15 minutes ago. 

Mikey blinked, unsure if he'd read right. if Donnie had been active that recently, then he had to have seen the messages. Mikey swiped open the tracker's last known location.

there was none.

the image had a red line with white text over the top that read TRACKER DISABLED. 

why was Donnie's tracker off? that didn't seem right. It wasn't like Mikey's immediate older brother to turn off his tracker or not respond to messages. 

something was wrong.

Mikey put the phone down, looking up at splinter as he hung up on Karai. Splinter glanced at Mikey briefly, his nose twitching, before moving back toward where he had been meditating.

"Sensei-" Mikey was about to tell him what he'd found but stopped when his phone vibrated. he picked it up and saw the call coming from April.

Oh for the love of-

Mikey answered it. "hullo?"

"Mikey?" the voice was not April.

"Leo?" Mikey's heart lifted as he heard his oldest brother's voice. Splinter stopped from where he had been trying to get into position, his ears turning toward the youngest.

"hey, Mike. What's up?" he sounded tired and his voice seemed a bit slurred. 

"Leo!" Mikey slightly scolded, despite the pain in his jaw. "where have you been?! we've been worried sick!"

"Sorry, sorry. I got lost and... uh... my phone was dead." His words became a bit more forced and drawn out. Splinter stood once more and padded over to Mikey. "are you guys all okay?"

Mikey nodded, then realized that Leo couldn't see him. "yeah, we're all okay. Raph was shot by a tranq but he's here." Mikey didn't hear a response, so he spoke up again. "Leo, are you alright? you sound funny."

"just a little headache, I'm fine." Mikey knew that was a blatant lie by the tone of Leo's voice. Leo had always been a terrible liar. "and Donnie?"

Mikey was confused. "what about Donnie? Isn't he with you?"

"We got separated, I thought he may have found you."

"no, we haven't told anyone our location yet."

"oh yeah, that's why I came to Aprils," Leo mumbled. he was really out of it, Mikey could tell.

"Maybe you should wait there and see if he does the same."

"good idea," Leo responded. 

"Can I talk to April?"

"mhm." Mikey heard the shuffling of the phone being handed off, then April's voice. 

"Hey, Mikey, what's up?"

"is Leo okay?"

She seemed to hesitate. "I think he's got a concussion. I'll try to keep him awake and keep an eye out for Donnie. you three stay safe."

Mikey huffed again. that made more sense. "will do. you too. Bye."

"bye." She hung up and Mikey frowned at the phone for a moment before looking up at Splinter.

his father was stroking his beard thoughtfully, not looking at his son. He had probably heard the whole thing. after an awkward amount of silence between the two, Raph groaned. 

Mikey immediately looked at him, as he squinted, his face drawing up.

"Raph?"

Raph groaned again, then mumbled something incoherent before slowly managing to open his eyes. Splinter went over and knelt at his side, but Mikey stayed where he was, worried about hurting his ankle anymore. "mmm, wh'res M'key?" Raph slowly slurred, turning his head to the side a bit, spotting the turtle in orange. 

"I'm right here, Raph. you're safe." Mikey smiled reassuringly and heard a soft churr in response. of all the brothers, Raph churred the least, so he must have been really out of it.

two brothers barely able to think straight and one missing.

this day was going just swell, wasn't it?

Chapter Text

Donnie awoke to a strange scraping sound. He hadn't meant to fall asleep, but his body desperately needed it. 

He opened his eyes, looking across the box to see cracks of light forming in the seams across from him, growing brighter. 

one of the walls was opening. 

Donnie squinted as the box was flooded with light and stiffened, relighting all the previous injuries. His shoulder hurt less now, but it still ached in a deep way. 

Donnie's eyes adjusted some, and the figure alone in the light caused all his internal alarms to set off like fireworks. the sharp points over the head were plenty enough to clue him in. 

the Shredder observed him for a moment with keen eyes, and Donnie curled in on himself more. Donnie glared at Saki as hard as he could, but it wasn't like he cared. 

"I'm aware of the skill of Leonardo," the enemy started, putting a hand on his chin quizzically. "and the might of Raphael. Hell, I even know Michelangelo, but not YOU." his voice was that of a sneer and it made Donnie uncomfortable. "You're always there in a fight, but you've never really seemed as remarkable as your brothers. I haven't even learned your name, turtle."

Donnie swallowed. He had tried his best to keep up with his brothers, but even his enemies noticed his lack of talent?

"thisss," the fly mutant beside Shredder buzzed, "izzz Donatello."

"Donatello." Shredder considered the name for a moment before scowling. "pathetic." he turned, motioning his hand to someone Donnie couldn't see as the turtle bore holes in the back of his head.

"massster," Stock-fly put a finger up. "do not underessstimate him. He isss very intelligent."

his words fell on deaf ears, and several foot soldiers, Donnie could tell they were not bots, stepped into his view, approaching the box. they reached in, toward him, and He pressed further back into the wall, scooting into one of the corners to avoid their hands. 

they grumbled a bit, but persisted, one of them managing to wrap a hand around Donnie's ankle and pulled. 

Donnie cried out, kicking his other foot toward the soldier. He wasn't going down without a fight. 

his struggle ended up being useless, leaving him trapped in the arms of two soldiers and led down the hall behind the Shredder. The rest of the soldiers came with them, surrounding Donnie. He Huffed, attempting to dig his heels into the ground, but they responded by lifting him off the ground. Frustrated, he tried kicking his feet, but Shredder stopped, turning fully to him. 

Donnie stiffened, recognizing the dark warning in his enemy's eyes. Shredder looked him up and down for a moment before lifting a hand. "Let him walk on his own."

The guards released Donnie and he stumbled forward a bit before catching himself. he huffed again, straightening as the guards moved forward, not allowing him an inch of space to do much of anything. 

He walked, albeit sluggishly, and silently cursed his body for deciding to betray him this way. He was sick, sleep-deprived, hungry, and hurting. 

His odds were not too swell at that moment. 

He was led to an actual room, rather than another box, with a creepy-looking chair in the center. The room was only lit by one hanging lightbulb. Donnie saw the rope and knew the circumstances.

He opted to hopefully avoid that. 

"What do you want?" He asked, stifling a cough as his voice scratched. 

Shredder turned and looked at him calmly for a moment, before smiling softly. Donnie was startled. He hadn't expected the man could MAKE a face like that. 

"Nothing from you." He replied. "I may later, but at the moment I only have one goal."

"And what would that be?" Donnie crossed his arms. 

"Well, if I tell you, it'll ruin the surprise." Shredder stepped to the side, motioning toward the chair with his hand. "please, have a seat, Donatello."

Donnie didn't move. He didn't like this, any of this. It felt wrong, more than it should have. the sudden change in mood of his enemy made him anxious. What exactly was in store for him?

when he made no notion of moving, Shredder's smile faded, replaced by his signature scowl. "I don't ask twice." He shifted and grabbed Donnie's forearm, pulling on his hurt shoulder. Donnie winced, but dug his heels in, grabbing Shredder's arm with his free hand. 

Shredder stopped tugging, narrowing his eyes, but not releasing Donnie's arm. 

the two glared at each other for a few moments before Shredder raised his chin a bit. "Fine. you choose to be stubborn, then be stubborn at your own risk."

He released Donnie's arm, leaving it sore from his grip, and shoved past the turtle. 

"Watch him!" 

he exited the room, leaving Donnie with the guards, who all kept their eyes on him, raising their weapons if he even moved his fingers. 

Donnie pressed his lips into a thin line. Think, what do you do? this is your chance.

He scanned the ninja's weapons, but nothing he knew how to wield well enough. most were odd-shaped swords. if they were footbots, he may have a better chance, but since he can't just lop off these guys' heads without major consequences, he was pretty stuck. 

Shredder returned quickly, ordering the guards to grab Donnie and get him in the chair. they apprehended his arms, but he struggled, thrashing and kicking around in an almost-desperate attempt to stop whatever was coming. He wouldn't back down, even as they used the thick rope to bind his wrists to the arms, and his ankles to the chair legs. they also bound his waist, shoulders, and thighs, rendering him nearly immobile without the tightly-bound rope digging into his skin harshly. 

Damnit, he hated this. 

The shredder took his place directly in front of the turtle, still frowning. 

He leaned over, locking two thin metal bands on Donnie's wrists, shifting the rope back a bit to get them on. then he straightened, crossing his arms intimidatingly. at least, Donnie assumed he was trying to be intimidating. the awkward way his armor clinked together and he had to readjust some of the blades nullified the affect. 

"this is how this is going to work," He started, any softness in his voice before now long gone. "You are going to stop being a brat or those nifty little accessories will shock you. I won't hesitate to increase the voltage if you continue to be defiant."

Donnie raised a brow. "What makes you think I'm being defiant?"

Shredder narrowed his eyes again. "do not test me, turtle." Donnie responded to this with a glare.

he waved the guards away, leaving only him and Donnie in the room. This was far more unsettling to Donnie, and he resisted the urge to change his face in any way.

Shredder leaned in close to the turtle's face, tilting his head slightly as he looked directly into Donnie's blood-red eyes. Donne internally noted that he had brown eyes and that the one with burn scars had an irritated look to it. 

"I will not make this easy for you. That will be up to you. Give up now or the pain I can instill upon your feeble existence will far surmount anything else you've ever dealt with."

Donnie raised his chin, not removing his gaze from his enemies, but relaxing it. "How can you know what I've dealt with? I'm sure a tin can like you can't do anything new to me."

Shredder shook his head, and huffed, standing straight once more. "fine, but remember you chose this." 

He left, closing the door and turning off the light behind him, leaving Donnie alone in the darkness. He allowed his whole body to release the tension he'd been holding, trying at wiggling out of the ropes. He only managed to irritate his skin some and tire himself out. 

He sat there, in the darkness, for what seemed like several hours, until his ears started ringing from the silence. He tried to shake his head to clear it, but only managed to recognize that his headache had gotten worse. He noted that he was still very cold, and sweating, and tired. 

the silence was unbearable. he'd expected and prepared himself for shred-head ranting evilly or torturing him, or SOMETHING other than leaving him alone with nothing to see or hear.

Donnie took a deep breath. this was fine, he could make his own noise. 

He remembered this lullaby, one that Leo knew and would hum to him and his brothers whenever they had a turtle pile when they were younger. Usually, it was when Mikey had a bad dream and wanted to be with all of them. Leo would always sit while the rest curled up together and hum this bittersweet lullaby that reminded Donnie of spring rain. 

So Donnie hummed it to himself. He knew the tune by heart, and every time it ended, he'd start over at the beginning.

He hummed until he couldn't anymore, his head drooping, and his mind falling into a light, dreamless sleep.

Chapter Text

"Leo?" 

The turtle's eyelids were heavy, and they felt like they were welded together. He was so tired and his head hurt. what did the voice want?

"Leo, wake up for a second. I gotta make sure you're not brain dead." 

"'m not." He mumbled. 

"can you open your eyes?"

"don' wanna." He sluggishly turned to the side, burying his head in the pillow. why couldn't she just let him sleep?

"Your brothers are coming to pick you up."

his brothers, right. Mikey, Raph, and Donnie. 

something wasn't sitting right. he had forgotten something. 

he finally forced his blue eyes open, looking at the hideous floral-print couch he was laying on. 

"there you go. can you sit up?" she urged more.

He groaned. no one told him what to do. He was Leonardo, the leader!

he sat up anyway, looking up at the redhead. He blinked, still slightly disoriented. "Where 'm I?"

"my apartment. you came here after you got lost, remember?"

He nodded slowly. "mhm, lost in the sewers." He stopped, furrowing his brows. "How'd I get lost in the sewers? I live there!"

April shrugged. "I don't know. only Donnie was with you."

Donnie... Donnie, Donnie, Donnie, there was something about Donnie. What was it? He wracked his brain for when he'd last seen his younger brother, and his memory briefly flashed back to the lair, when the shredder invaded, and Donnie was sick. Which had happened first?

He'd gone to the sewers to get away from the foot bots.

everything came rushing back at once, the Shellraiser being attacked, hiding in the sewers, the fight that followed, and then...

nothing. 

"I was washed down the sewers!" Leo shot the rest of the way up, pain shooting through his head and causing him to curl in on himself with a groan. 

"Woah, slow down, Leo. You're hurt."

"No!" he gasped. "I left Don with those footbots, alone! He's alone and sick and I left him!" He was attempting to grab his plastron, grip the fuzzy blanket over himself and rip it off. "I left him and he needs help!"

"Leo!" April grabbed his shoulders. "Breathe. it's okay."

He couldn't breathe, he couldn't THINK! He needed to help Donnie. Where was Donnie?! His breathing was shallow and quick and his chest compressed, not allowing him to receive the extra oxygen he needed. His head hurt, GOD it hurt so much. Damnit, he needed to help Donnie! He tried pulling at the blanket, his chest, the white bandages wrapped around his arms, anything he could get ahold of!

He needed out! He needed to get up and help!

"Leo, stop squirming. take a deep breath."

"I can't! I left him!" it was the only coherent thought he could manage. 

"You didn't mean to."

"I was careless! I put him in danger! I was supposed to protect him!" He shook his head vigorously, swallowing down the distressed chirps that had built in his throat. 

Some of his thoughts escaped his lips, yelled between breaths, balancing precariously on the edge of sanity for even a moment. Other thoughts remained inside, eating away at his lungs and heart. they made his blood pump faster. they made his breathing quicken. they spiraled him deeper till he was barely squeaking out any words, the darker thoughts having too great of a hold on his throat. 

his body was shaking, curling into himself tighter and tighter, and his head pounded, filling his hearing with ringing and painful pulses, like drums of war. his vision blurred, whether from tears or lack of oxygen, he wasn't sure. the only thoughts at that point were simple-minded and straightforward. Breathe, and find him.

was he dying?

then he felt firm, gentle hands on his shoulders. 

they were familiar in this situation. Donnie had found out about his attacks fairly quickly, he always walked him through with a calm voice and a steady hand. 

but Leo had his eyes closed. When had Donnie gotten there? What were the strange mumbles that broke through the roaring noise in his ears. the thumbs on the hands rubbed over his shoulders. 

that was weird, it tingled and stung. why did it sting? Donnie never did that. 

Scratch my shell, Donnie, you know that's what helps. 

The rubbing didn't stop, and Leo choked back a yell.

Stop, please stop. 

He tried to squirm, but the hands held firm. 

No, no, no, no, leave me alone! You're not Donnie!

"My son," the voice broke through the chaos, and Leo flinched, suddenly recognizing extra fingers on the hands and fur. "you must breathe."

Stop telling me that! I know that! I can't- I'm trying!

"Leonardo, calm yourself."

"Leo?" another voice broke through, and Leo felt a pit in his stomach. It couldn't have been Mikey. He had tried so hard to keep Mikey from finding out about these. 

Leo wrapped his hands behind his neck, pushing the thoughts away. He needed to focus. what did Donnie always do?

in for four, hold for seven, out for eight?

Leo started the exercise, and the hands removed themselves. He was relieved by the absence but still yearned for the welcome stimulation on his shell.

once hed gained more control of his breathing, he opened his eyes, noting that his vision had started to focus. he looked up at splinter, sitting in front of him, looking worried. 

"I see you, sensei." his expression switched to confusion as Leo continued. "I see the couch, I see the wall, I see that pillow, and I see my hands."

Splinter tilted his head, but Leo ignored him, he had to finish before he engaged with them. 

"I can feel my neck, I can feel the blanket, I can feel the cushions, and I can feel your leg." Leo touched Splinter's leg for a brief moment before pulling back. 

he continued, verbalizing three things he could hear, two things he could smell, and one thing he could taste. Once he'd finished, he took a few more deep breaths before uncurling his knees and replacing his legs over the edge of the couch, gripping the edge of the cushions. 

Splinter looked at him for a moment, frowning. "I thought you had control of these fits, Leonardo."

Aaaand the headache returns.

That was why only Donnie knew. 

the only response Leo could even give his sensei was a slight shake of his head, as a suffocating amount of anger washed over him. He used a few more breaths to contain it, not allowing any more loss of control than he had already. 

He looked up nervously at his brothers, well, two of them. Raph looked odd, not angry, but not really expressing ANY emotions. He was just staring at Leo with a blank face. Mikey looked incredibly worried, his shoulders drawn up and his hands clasped together against his chest.

Leo looked away, down at his lap. 

Damnit.

Chapter Text

y'know, if He had been left alone for a few hours, things would seem fine. even a day could be explainable.

but if Donnie's calculations were correct, he'd been in this dark, silent room for almost four days without anyone opening the door for any reason. 

no food.

no water.

no people.

hell, he couldn't even move, and whatever ailment he was dealing with was getting worse. He had started shivering uncontrollably between full-body aches and fever dreams that usually involved pain and suffering for either him or his brothers. 

Donnie considered that the only reason the Shredder opened his door then had something to do with the angry look on his face. 

The way the door opened, lit up the room harshly, making Donnie flinch and squint as his enemy stormed in. He wasted no time, slamming his hands onto either armrest, hovering over Donnie, and huffing. 

Donnie merely blinked at him, not having enough energy to speak, move, or really do anything. He could only lock eyes with Shredder and hope his anger wasn’t going to be misdirected. Donnie hadn’t done anything, just sat in that chair for several days. He couldn’t reach the knots for the ropes, and he couldn’t bite any of them off when his shoulders were pinned like they were. 

The Shredder narrowed his eyes at the turtle, and Donnie attempted to swallow the non-existent saliva in his mouth. Dehydration really does something to a terrapin. 

“Your brothers have disappeared, though I shouldn’t be surprised.” Shredder finally said, and a small wave of relief washed over Donnie. He hadn’t caught them yet, that was good. “But they took all your human friends with them.”

And? Donnie thought. That seemed normal. After they came back from the farmhouse, they’d set up security at April’s apartment, and had an evacuation protocol in case anything happened again. Her and Kirby had stubbornly refused to move, not that Donnie could blame them. If Shredder knew what window to throw Leo through, then their location was compromised. 

Now why he hadn’t considered that the other day when Splinter ordered them to meet there, Donnie didn’t know. Maybe it was the fever. 

When Donnie didn’t show any signs of responding, Shredder continued. “You see, I need to send them a little message.”

Donnie didn’t like the sound of that.

“So you are going to tell me where to find them.”

Donnie held back a laugh, both from the fact that he thought he’d tell him willingly, and that he hadn’t considered that Donnie’s dry throat couldn’t cough anymore, let alone talk. 

Shredder looked at his captive, scowling when Donnie didn’t answer. “You stubborn reptile, this can go much easier for you if you give up.”

Yeah, you said that before. Donnie narrowed his eyes and pulled his lips into a line to look skeptically at Shredder. 

He did not seem to like that, as he slapped Donnie. 

Donnie hissed, and suppressed a growl that grew in his chest, turning to look back. 

Donnie sighed, coughing dryly, then frowning, attempting to speak. His request for water was one word and a barely audible whisper. 

Shredder looked at him suspiciously, as if he would somehow find a way to escape with a sip of water. Donnie figured a walnut would be more useful than water. Shredder agreed, and had one of his guards hold a water bottle to Donnie’s mouth. He downed the whole thing, but not too quickly. He wanted to retain it if he could.

When the guard drew back, Shredder crossed his arms. “Now tell me.”

Donnie raised his eyebrows. “Tell you what?”

“I gave you water, now tell me where your brother’s may be.”

Donnie wore a confused expression. “I don’t seem to recall any deal. I just asked for water.”

He didn’t consider until after the words left his mouth that they may be printed on his gravestone. The hand that grabbed his chin, digging finger into his cheeks deterred a further remark, instead causing him to release a surprised chirp. Shredder put his face inches from Donnie, pulling him closer so the ropes around his shoulders cut into his skin. 

“And I seem to recall that your life is currently in my hands, turtle.”

Donnie groaned, glared, and attempted to talk with his hands on his cheek. “And I seem to recall that I’ve been here for several days, so how the hell am I supposed to know where they are?!”

Shredder blinked, an expression Donnie could only have described as shock passing over his face before he once again hardened his gaze, releasing Donnie’s face. “Well, is there anywhere else the cowards hide?”

Donnie considered it for a moment, but came up blank. “I don’t know, why don’t you try checking up your ass? I’m sure there’s a stick there big enough for the whole family to hide in.”

Shredder became livid, and Donnie stiffened. Perhaps he had taken it too far, but he honestly didn’t care. If Shredder kept him alive this long, then he had a reason, a use for him. He wouldn’t kill him.

And if Donnie could waste another minute to keep Shredder from finding his brothers, then so be it. 

Shredder huffed, turning around and making a motion for one of the ninja outside the door. They disappeared and returned a moment later with a cart covered in a clean white fabric. Donnie eyed it nervously. Shredder reached under the cloth and pulled out a single object. 

Donnie’s T-phone. 

Donnie took a breath in quickly, and opened his mouth, but Shredder's hand muffled his command before it could be clearly articulated. 

“Don’t think Bradford didn’t tell me about your little self-destruct stunt.”

Donnie glared as Shredder waved the phone tauntingly. “Stockman managed to deactivate your tracker, so don’t think they’ll find you here, either.” He smiled. “But if this one has a tracker, then your brothers must also have them, right?”

Donnie tried to not allow his expression to change, but considering the smirk forming on the man's face, he was failing. 

“Good to know.” he teased, tossing the phone to one of the guards and ordering him to take it to Stockman. Donnie hoped he’d slip up, take his hand off a second too early so Donnie could get the command through, but the guard was long gone by the time Shredder removed his gloved hand from his mouth. 

Donnie had nothing else to say, but Shredder apparently did. “Now, what to do with you.” He looked Donnie up and down. “You’re sick, and have no use to me now.”

Donnie avoided looking at him then, and that seemed to irritate him. 

“What is it you’re hoping to accomplish?” He mused. “You can’t escape, or fight. All you can do is cooperate and hope I am merciful. There are no other options.”

Donnie shrugged. “There are always other options.”

“Like what?”

“Like fuck you, that’s what.”

Shredder had enough. He sighed and crossed his arms. “Fine. you’ve said enough. Gag him.” he ordered his ninja. 

Donnie cringed. That was not the intended response. He’d hoped to make Shredder angry enough to leave, not whatever this was. The guards came over with a thick white strip of fabric and Donnie thrashed his head around as much as possible. “Get away from me!”

The cloth was pulled roughly into his mouth, pulling back on his cheeks as they tied it as tight as possible. One of them gripped his head so he’d stop squirming. He growled into the cloth, glaring at his enemy.

Then he realized he’d fully removed the cloth from the cart. 

And every item on it turned Donnie’s overheating blood ice cold.

Chapter Text

Raph stared at the sky. It was still cloudy from the recent rain, and no stars were visible. 

Not that there ever were. 

He liked the stars at the farmhouse, far out enough from the city to avoid the light pollution and smog that usually coated everything. The city that never sleeps, as it was called. 

Raph turned his head to look at his family. Leo was sleeping in a pile of blankets, his whole body on his side, and his legs tangled in the blankets. He had bandages on his arms and legs from April. She said he had some pretty nasty scrapes, but nothing past that. They just needed to be kept clean. What worried Raph the most was his head. Leo seemed so out of it.

And how he was when they arrived at April’s…

Raph shook his head. He didn’t want to think about it. The thought had crossed his mind that Leo had had it before, the way he seemed to talk and act to calm himself down. Raph couldn’t be angry that Leo kept it to himself. 

Raph was angry at Splinter. 

When they came in, and April was panicking saying something was wrong with Leo, Raph recognized the panic attack right away. Everyone expressed it differently, like Leatherhead, who blacked out and attacked everyone. Mikey was able to calm Leatherhead down, he knew the best ways to do so.

But when Splinter grabbed Leo’s shoulders, and Raph could see how adverse an effect it had on his older brother, he knew that Splinter didn’t know the best way to do so. And when Leo had calmed himself down, Splinter had scolded him. That peeved Raph the most. Not just that, but the way Leo reacted to that blatantly showing Raph that this wasn’t a first. 

Leo probably kept it to himself because of Splinter's attitude toward it. 

Raph knew Leo was hurt and stressed. He could tell that his older brother was putting a lot of this on himself. Raph could see the self-destructive train of thoughts circling his head when he was awake. 

Raph didn’t want Leo to have to deal with this. 

Mikey was slightly better, stressed but still functioning. April had wrapped his ankle before they’d left and said he needed to stay off it for a few days. 

It had been a few days. 

There was still no sign of Donnie. The whole family refused to verbalize what they all expected. 

The Shredder had him.

Raph huffed, standing up. He quietly exited the crack-in-the-ground hiding place they’d set up camp for the night and walked across the junk yard. The comfy hole in the pile of garbage wasn’t fully covered, with a spot that Raph liked to look out of on the roof, but it was big and sturdy enough to temporarily shelter three mutant turtles and their rat sensei.

He walked out of the junkyard, finding the nearest fire escape to climb and soaring over the rooftops. He remembered where Shredder had kept Karai, and figured there was a possibility that they were keeping Donnie there too. 

He also considered the possibility that it would be a trap, just like with Karai. The surface was still swarming with footbots, and the sewers even more so. They had tried to go back for some necessary belongings, but decided not to test their already flimsy fate. 

Raph snuck in the broken window atop the Foot headquarters roof. He grappled down carefully, not seeing Shredder in the throne room. 

Somehow, that did not make him feel better. 

Raph snuck deeper through the halls, reaching the sublevels and the dungeon in no time. He checked each of the cells carefully, not finding his brother in any of them.

The alarm started to go off. 

Damnit.

Raph wouldn’t leave without Donnie, but his gut told him Donnie wasn’t there. That would be too easy, too obvious. 

So where the hell was he?

Raph avoided the guards that had started bustling in the halls, and managed to exit the same way he’d come in. He heard the screeching of a car and looked over the edge of the roof. 

The Shredder himself stepped out of it, and looked directly up at Raphael.

Raph hesitated, but decided to drop down directly in front of the enemy. The soldiers around him shifted into defensive positions, but Shredder held a hand up, stopping them. 

“Raphael, to what do I owe the displeasure?”

“House call.” Raph growled. “Where’s my brother?” He pointed one of his sais at the enemy. 

Shredder tapped his shin thoughtfully. “Which one? I believe you have several.”

“Donnie, where’s Donnie?!”

Shredder looked him up and down, before smirking. “Wouldn’t you like to know?”

Raph didn’t like this. Normally, Shredder was not quite so calm. What was he planning?

“I’d hate to stay and chat, but I have previous matters to attend to. Someone broke into my house.” Shredder nodded his head past Raph and toward the building he’d just come out of. He lifted his hand and motioned toward him. “Get rid of him.”

The soldiers all began to creep toward Raph. who took his own defensive pose. He felt his nerves light up in anger, driving toward his fists and feet, and urging him to attack, scream, do something. 

But the way Shredder smirked, reading his every thought and move, made Raph think twice, for once. He paused, looking around. He sure as hell was outnumbered, and alone. He hadn’t told his family where he was going, and if he got captured, he wouldn’t be any help to Donnie. 

So, for once, Raph called his own tactical retreat.

But he swore on Shredder's head that he’d find his brother, and he’d make that tin can pay for hurting his family.

Chapter Text

Donnie liked to think he was a logical person, even in his worst moments. He liked to believe that even when he was running a fever, he could still solve problems relatively well. He could understand the hows and the whys for almost everything.

But he couldn’t understand this. 

It was torture, that much was obvious, but not in the normal sense. Granted, Donnie was anything but normal. Torture was usually one of two things. 

Physical or mental discomfort in which the relief from it was exchanged for valuable information.

Or the person was a psychopath that reveled in their victim's pain. 

Somehow, this was neither. 

Donnie couldn’t give any information with the gag on, so that option was out, and Shredder made no motions to remove it or ask him any questions. But he worked the entire time with a straight face, no longer smiling, nor showing any pleasure or otherwise in the turtle squirming. 

But somehow, he seemed to have intent, as far as Donnie could tell, but he had no idea what it was. What was the point of this?

Donnie dove deeper into his own mind, probing his own thoughts and knowledge as a way to ignore what Shredder was doing to his body. It was becoming progressively more difficult as his nervous system sent repetitive alerts to his brain, ordering him to assess the damage. 

Two broken fingers on his right hand, a few cracked ribs, various painful but not lethal cuts that probably needed stitches all over his arms and legs, nasty-looking burn marks under those damn metal bracelets from when he wouldn’t sit still, and more. Donnie had wiggled mostly, and let out a chirp or two, but other than that, he tried to remain quiet and stoic. 

He had a feeling that Shredder was trying to break him.

When Shredder finished for the day, he left the room, and the soldiers finally unbound Donnie and moved him to a separate empty room, threw in a first aid kit, and locked the door behind them. Donnie sat there for a moment, just breathing. He was glad to be free of the chair and the gag and the presence of Shredder. 

Donnie leaned forward slowly, grabbing the first aid kit with his left hand, and pulling it back towards himself. He surveyed the contents and realized a fatal flaw his captors had made. The kit had toothpicks, q-tips, and a pair of plastic tweezers. 

Donnie smirked a bit. He could work with this. He’d patch himself up, then he’d get the hell out of here. He had to find his family, and if Shredder had been honest, then they were not at any of their homes. Perhaps Donnie could send them a message. He didn’t want to risk trying to get his T-phone back.

Donnie found several small tongue depressors that he broke apart, rubbing the splintered ends against the concrete to smooth the edges. He took his right hand in his left, gingerly feeling the placement of his bones. He suspected that Shredder had thought he was right-handed, but luckily he was wrong. Donnie set the bones, pushing past the pain to brace the appendages with the depressors and some band-aids. 

He used some butterfly bandages for deeper cuts, making sure to clean out all the open wounds with alcohol wipes. He didn’t get any stitching sets in the kit, so it was the best he could do on short notice. He covered the rest of the cuts in bandaids. There was a particularly large gash on his left arm that he wrapped in gauze. Other than that, he couldn’t do much with the kit. 

So he picked up the materials he had set aside earlier, pushing himself to his feet. He swayed a bit, nausea attempting to take over. He’d need to avoid fighting. He didn’t have the energy or the strength. He needed food and water, but it didn’t seem that was coming from his captors. 

He used a toothpick to pick the lock on the door. Luckily, it was a simple lock, and not some kind of electronic lock like the krang had. He opened the door slowly, finding one guard who had dozed off sitting against the wall. 

He carefully closed the door and relocked it, checking the guard over for anything useful. He found a set of keys and some Kunai that he took with him, as he ran down the hall. It was more of a light jog since his body was still attempting to reject his existence. 

This building wasn’t familiar. It wasn’t like any of the ones they’d broken into before. It was straightforward, with EXIT signs pointing out the way he needed to go. 

Donnie paused, blinking at one of the signs. Was this real? 

He huffed. It didn’t matter. Either he got out or he didn’t.

So he continued running and spotted the exit door at the base of a stairwell. 

Yes!

A group of guards came around the opposite side spotting and shouting at him. 

No!

Donnie ran as fast as his legs would let him, even as the alarms started blaring and fuzzy darts flew past his head. 

He shoved through the door, crying out from the bolt of pain that came from his ribs. 

He was on a dock, and it looked like it overlooked the city. Staten Island…

Donnie ran for the water. It didn’t matter at that moment that he had open cuts all over his body, just that he got away. He was a turtle, he had an advantage in the water. 

A searing pain shot through his left leg, so hot his vision blurred as he tumbled into the ground hard. He took in a sharp breath, rolled over, grabbed his knee, and saw the blade that had been projected straight through his lower thigh, dangerously close to his ankle. He sat up as best he could, cradling the limb with his good hand. 

He looked up to see the Shredder on the roof of the building, lowering his arm. 

Shit shit shit shit SHIT.

Shredder hopped down, walking towards Donnie, slowly and deliberately. 

Donnie attempted to scoot away but didn’t get far before Shredder reached him, pressing his foot on Donnie’s plastron and successfully pinning him. He didn’t stop there, putting pressure on Donnie’s ribs, making the turtle squirm and his breath catch. 

Then Shredder grabbed the handle of the sword that had impaled Donnie’s leg, and Donnie yelled. He tried to kick and hit Shredder, but got no response as the villain simply leaned over, putting even more weight on Donnie's chest. 

“Where do you think you’re going?” He tilted his head curiously, his completely calm and collected voice spiking fear through Donnie’s heart. 

“Away from you!” Donnie shouted, gripping Shredder's ankle with his good hand to release some of the pressure on his ribs.

“Is that so?” Shredder moved his hand back, shifting the blade, and Donnie muffled a scream as more pain shot through his body. 

“Stop! Let me go!” Donnie was barely able to gasp out as Shredder continued adding pressure. It was unbearable! A few more seconds and Donnie wouldn’t be able to breathe. 

Then, Shredder lifted his foot, placing his feet on either side of the turtle's torso as he gasped for stolen breath.

Donnie looked up at his enemy between breaths, feeling his shoulders tremble slightly, the build-up of fear and dread overflowing in him. 

Shredder frowned, “you belong to the Foot Clan now. Remember your place.” 

Then he slowly dragged the blade down more, eliciting a scream that clawed its way out of Donnie’s throat. 

“You can not run.”

Shredder yanked the sword out, and the turtle cried out again, attempting to curl in on himself.

“You can not hide.”

The pain came again, though not from his legs this time, but from his wrists and those damn bracelets. His vision went white for a brief moment as his body convulsed. 

Please.

“You will die by my hand when I give you permission to.” 

All the pain faded, leaving dull, pulsing aches through Donnie's body. He laid his head back on the ground, clenching his eyes and mouth shut. He had screamed, but he would not cry. Shredder didn’t deserve his tears. 

Shredder had guards hoist Donnie up by his shoulders and drag him back inside. Donnie didn’t have the energy to fight, though his heart still urged him to. His brain refused to listen, allowing his limbs to hang limp. 

They put him back in the room, took away the first-aid kit, and locked the door once again. 

Donnie lay on his shell for what could have been hours, staring at the ceiling. He didn’t want to move when his whole body would violently reject the action. He didn’t want to sleep either. 

He was so scared, scared that if he fell asleep in his condition, he wouldn’t wake up. 

At that moment, his life was valuable, it was worth something.

There were things only Donnie could finish. 

Alpha Beta Double Omega Triple Y.

And he had a feeling he’d be getting that opportunity very soon.

Chapter Text

Mikey stood slowly, still feeling an ache in his ankle, but nothing he couldn’t handle. 

They had wasted enough time. 

Leo looked up at him. “Mike? What’re you doing?”

“We need to help Donnie.” Mikey huffed.

"Sensei ordered us to stay here." Leo frowned. He didn't like it either, but he didn't like defying Splinter either. 

"Well staying here isn't going to help Donnie!" Mikey turned to him. It had been too long since his tech-savvy brother had gone missing. If he was capable, he would have contacted them by now, somehow. If he couldn't do that, he was too hurt to resist the hoards of footbots swarming the surface and the sewers. 

or worse.

Mikey didn't want to think about that. He was with Shredder, or he was gone for good, and Mikey preferred the former. 

Leo sighed, rubbing his temple. "It's better that Sensei and Raph do the recon, then we can help when they find Donnie."

Mikey looked at him almost desperately. "But more eyes are always better!"

Leo looked at him sympathetically. "And if you're seen and need to retreat?" He looked at Mikey's ankle that he was unconsciously favoring. "How're you supposed to get away?"

Mikey huffed again, plopping back down on the couch. "I hate this!"

"I know."

"I want to be out there helping!" 

"I know."

Mikey pulled his legs to his chest, setting his chin on his arms as they crossed over his knees. "I miss him."

Leo looked at his hands in his lap. "Me too." 

Mikey looked at Leo. He looked so… dejected. Ever since they'd gotten him from April, he'd been much quieter. Mikey could feel the anger and depression radiating off of him whenever he was coherent. The effects of his concussion seemed to heal quickly, but not quickly enough. Leo wanted to be out there too, Mikey could tell.

"How's your head?" Mikey softened his voice. He had no reason to be angry at Leo. As far as anyone could tell, Leo got hurt protecting Donnie, and no one had seen Don since. 

"Better. Doesn't feel like it's going to explode anymore."

"That's good." Mikey nodded. 

The two were silent for a moment before Mikey spoke again, much quieter than before. 

"Do you think he's okay?" 

Leo tapped his fingers on his knee for a second before his face drew up slightly. "Considering where he is, I'm not sure."

Mikey nodded. "So he's probably hurt." 

Leo nodded. "Probably."

Mikey looked up at the barely stable cover in their trash hole, breathing deeply to hold back the stinging in his eyes. "What if he's scared?"

Leo swallowed, and muttered, "he probably is."

That didn't make Mikey feel any better as he blinked back any water that decided to form. "Oh god, what do we do?"

Leo shook his head, watching his youngest brother with sad eyes. "There's not much we can do at the moment. We just have to wait for Sensei and Raph to report back." 

Mikey couldn't hold back the tears any longer. "It's not fair! Donnie didn't do anything wrong! Who knows what that monster is doing to him?"

Leo looked like he wanted to clarify something, but decided against it, instead clearing his throat and opening his arms for his baby bro. "C'mere." 

Mikey limped over and sat next to Leo, burying his face in his collar. 

He was silent as Leo held him, letting him release only what he was comfortable with. Leo scratched his shell, and muttered low comforting chirps and churrs until Mikey started replying back. 

"It's going to be okay, Mike. We'll get him back, he'll be fine."

Mikey nodded slowly, but something deeper in Leo's voice set off Mikey's internal alarms. 

He knew, deep down, that the sentiment was a lie.

Chapter Text

Donnie shivered when the door was reopened. 

He was given water, then dragged out of the room.

The guards were not gentle with his injured ankle, or anything else.

They held him on his knees, one guard holding each arm in a new room. This one was mostly dark with a spotlight shining down directly above him, restricting his vision beyond its field. 

Shredder returned with a new aura about him. He looked at Donnie like he was less than an ant beneath his shoe, an insignificant maggot in the grand scheme of his plans.

"Today is going to be a little different, turtle."

"Donnie."

"Pardon?"

"Donnie." Don didn't look up at him when he spoke in a near-whisper, but the hint of defiance in his voice remained. "My name is Donatello."

"Hmm." The mock consideration irked Donnie. "I don't care." 

Donnie raised his head to look at him, huffing. "If you're going to kill me, just do it instead of playing your dumb little game."

Shredder watched Donnie for a moment, his neutral expression unchanging. "I already told you, you will die when I give you permission to." He kneeled in front of the turtle. "You confuse me. Leonardo would fight as best as he could and attempt to talk his way out of your position. Raphael would scream and curse and thrash, but he would never give up, fueled by his anger. Even Michelangelo would attempt a brave face for as long as possible, before pleading with my 'humanity'." He made air quotes. "But not you, turtle. You don't scream or beg, or reason. You throw around insults, and tremble when that's taken away from you."

Donnie attempted to glare at him, but it was half-hearted, as he didn't have any energy. 

"You opt to annoy me, hoping I kill you or leave you alone in favor of self-preservation.c Shredder used his gloved hand to lift Donnie's chin. I wonder what you are without your smartass voice."

Donnie felt the involuntary shiver fun through his spine.

He wanted to go home. He didn't want to do this anymore. He didn't know, nor did he care what Shredder wanted with him or what he was planning. Donnie wanted to hug Mikey and for him to hold on tight in return. Donnie wanted to lose another spar to Raph again or have Leo scold him about managing his time. 

"Here's how this is going to work, turtle." Shredder stood up, reaching out of the light and retrieving a knife. "You may keep your honor if you wish, but I will continue this until you give me what I want."

Donnie sighed, allowing his head to hang again. He had no idea what Shredder wanted. How was he supposed to know? 

"What do you want?"

Shredder returned to kneeling before him. "I want you to reject your name?"

My name?

"What?"

"You are no longer Donatello." Shredder clarified. "I will kill Donatello. That is what I want."

"Then kill me." 

"No. You are not Donatello. You are now merely a martyr for your family's demise. Once you accept that, I will stop." He lifted the knife, pressing the tip to the edge of one of Donnie's scabbed-over cuts. 

My family's demise?

"Do you accept your new place?" Shredder asked. 

Donatello swallowed the bile that had risen in his throat. 

His tone was firm and growly as he responded.

"No!"

~~~

Once all the cuts were reopened, Shredder asked again. 

"Do you accept your new place?"

Donnie shook his head, able to feel the blood rushing through it. His voice was quieter. Reopening the wounds hurt more than the original cuts. He had tried, but a few painful screams had been released.

"No."

~~~

It had gotten worse, of course, it had. All the newly reopened wounds stung and pulsed from the salt that had been rubbed into them. His body was trembling from a few shocks since he'd been struggling so much. 

"Do you accept your new place?"

Don took a second to catch his breath, his body running cold as the ground was splattered in blood and sweat. 

"No-"

~~~

Each shock made his body light up in pain, but he knew the Shredder was getting agitated. 

That didn't make him feel better.

Why didn't it make him feel better?

"Do you accept your new place?"

It was all he could do between wrecking shivers to shake his head.

No…

~~~

Shredder grabbed his chin, his fingers cutting into his cheek as he lifted the turtle's face to meet him. 

He still felt the scalding hot brand on the side of his throat, and several visible marks on his body. When Shredder lifted his head, he cried out, closing his eyes tightly. He had to fight.

He had to fight- right?

He was fighting for something…

He couldn't think past the pain, every nerve in his body lit up with the slightest movement, attempting to push more screams out, attempting to pull salty tears from his eyes. He opened his eyes again.

And he cried, a sinister smile barely visible on the Shredder's face through the blue of the liquid. 

"Do you accept your new place?"

He closed his eyes once more.

He couldn't keep going. It was too much. 

He didn't know anymore.

"What is your name?"

He could hear the command in the voice. An answer was required. 

Something broke through the fog of pain.

Alpha beta double omega triple Y.

That's what he had to fight for. 

The answer was still no, but Donnie didn't need Shredder to know that, only needed him to stop.

"It doesn't matter," Donnie muttered. He was barely able to talk with the pain in his throat and the dryness from his screaming. 

Shredder smiled, pleased with the answer, and released Donnie. 

The guards also released him, leaving him on the ground in the spotlight. 

Donnie pressed his cheek to the concrete, breathing slowly. 

He could do this.

Shredder just had to slip up for a moment.

Chapter Text

Leo crossed his arms, half-listening to the conversation.

They’d found nothing. 

Splinter and Raph had scouted as many Foot hideouts as they knew of, and came up with nothing. No chatter or mention of a captured turtle, or even of Shredder being there in several weeks. 

What was more odd, they’d said, is that on their way back from the last one, the streets cleared out. All of the Footbots that had been swarming just disappeared. They didn’t see a single one after that. 

It gave Leo a very unsettling feeling. 

They were now discussing the next course of action and waiting for a call from April to update her and Casey. Splinter wanted them to stay as hidden as possible, only venturing once they were sure of where their brother was. He was playing it safe. 

Too safe.

Leo had tried to chime in, but between Mikey’s overwhelmed protests and Raph’s angry shouts hadn’t let him get much in. His head started hurting a bit again, and he gave up, sitting back and hoping his brothers would calm down. 

His phone rang. 

It was probably April, since they were expecting her to call anyway. The other two quieted down at the ringtone, directing their attention to their oldest. Leo picked up the phone from its upside down position and turned it over.

The profile picture was not of the redhead, but of his missing brother. 

Donnie was calling him. 

The shock on his face must have been apparent as both brothers scrambled over, Mikey letting out a high-pitched whine. Raph went still and silent, staring at the phone with a pale expression, before turning his green eyes up to Leo expectantly.

Leo took a deep breath, his unsettling feeling digging deeper into his gut. 

He answered, putting it on speaker phone.

“Hello?”

The line was silent for a second before a deep, menacing voice that definitely did NOT belong to his brother spoke. “Hello, Leonardo.”

Leo closed his eyes, clenching his jaw at the dread that began gnawing at his stomach. He didn’t want to see Raph’s or Mikey’s reactions.

But he heard Mikey’s breathing hitch, and the low growl that came from Raph.

“Shredder.” Leo said. “Where’s my brother?”

“He’s here.” Shredder said nonchalantly as if having a conversation. “Alive, might I add. You’re welcome for that, by the way.”

Leo attempted to keep his breathing steady. He didn’t dare show any weakness. “What do you want?”

“Tomorrow, at noon, I will send you a location. You must be at that location at midnight. You, both your brothers, and your Sensei.”

“And Donnie?”

“Will be there.” The Shredder confirmed, and a small wave of relief washed through Leo. Donnie was a hostage, Shredder couldn’t kill him. “Do you agree?”

Leo looked at his brothers, at his sensei who’d stood to join them, his hands on either of the sunset duo’s shoulders. Sensei gave a curt nod, and Mikey a more vigorous one. Raph frowned, looking at Leo with Leo’s own thoughts. It was a trap, he was sure of it. Shredder wanted all of them dead, especially Splinter. 

And they had no way of knowing if Donnie was even alive. They had no evidence.

Leo swallowed. “Let me talk to him.”

Shredder remained silent for a moment, then said. “I will allow you to speak to him, but you must be alone.”

Mikey’s face fell more, if that was possible, as he looked at Leo with pleading eyes. Raph’s face contorted in anger, his shoulders drawing up. Splinter locked eyes with Leo, his face serious as he nodded again. 

Mikey looked at him like he was crazy, and tried to push him off, but Splinter firmly guided him toward the hideout's exit. Raph surprisingly put up no fuss about it, allowing himself to be led. 

“Alright, they’re gone.” Leo switched the phone to private mode and held it up to his ear. “Now let him talk.”

He heard some movement on the other side, then breathing, slightly raspy. After a minute of listening to it, a small, quiet voice spoke “Leo?”

Leo pressed the phone more to his ear, as if his brother could feel it like a hug. “Donnie, thank god.”

Donnie let out a low whine that shot through Leo’s heart. “Are you hurt?”

Leo huffed, chuckling despite the situation. “No, I’m okay. We’re all okay. We’re safe.”

“That’s good.” Leo could hear the weariness in his brother's voice. 

After a few moments, Leo asked, “Don, are you still there?”

Donnies voice went up a pitch. “Leo, tell them I’m sorry.”

Leo clenched his eyes, moving his hand to grip his knee. His chest hurt, it hurt so much. His brilliant, loving, kindhearted brother was hurting so bad and he still felt the need to apologize, to make sure that his family was okay. “You can tell them yourself. We’re going to come get you, everything’s going to be okay.”

“Leo,” Don’s voice cracked, shattering what little resolve Leo had left as he stood and began to pace as well as he could in the small space. “I’m sorry.”

“You don’t have to apologize.” Leo tried to argue, but there was something under Donnie’s voice. He wasn’t apologizing for something he’d done yet. He was apologizing in advance. “Don?”

Donnie took a deep, trembling breath. “I love you guys.” then he muttered something, firmly and quickly “Alpha beta double omega triple Y- AGH!”

He cut off, and the call ended. Leo pulled the phone away from his face, looking at the screen as it went black. 

Then it sparked and fizzled, smoke emitted from it as it heated up and stung Leo’s hand. He cried out and threw it away from himself, pulling his hand against his plastron. He inspected his skin, finding no burns, then looked back to the phone. 

And it hit him.

His genius brother had sent out an order for Leos t-phone to self-destruct. 

He heard the distress of his family members outside and stepped out of the hideout to find two similar smoking phones. 

“Leo! I don’t know what happened, they just started sparking and heating up!” Mikey claimed. “We were trying to get a location on Donnie’s call and-”

Leo looked at the two phones, his mind swirling as he rubbed his thumb over where the heat had teased his skin. He interrupted his younger brother with a low voice. “He did all of them.”

The family looked at him for a moment before Raph narrowed his eyes. “What?”

“Donnie made all the t-phones self-destruct.” Leo said, slightly louder than before. “I got to talk to him and he spouted this code and then-” Leo motioned toward the phones.

“But why would he do that?” Mikey asked, “did he think it would help?”

Raph’s posture straightened and his voice deadpanned. “The trackers.”

“What?” Mikey squeaked. 

“The trackers. The self-destruct fries the trackers.” Raph clarified. 

“He was protecting us.” Leo swallowed the slight bit of bile that rose in his throat.

“But,” Mikey clasped his hands together and held them to his chest. “If the phones are broken, how’re we supposed to get Shredder's message tomorrow?”

Leo's brows furrowed together, a stinging in his eyes telling him that he needed to step away from his family for a minute. 

"We're not." 

Chapter Text

Donnie didn’t care that the Shredder had enough of him, that he was holding the turtle suspended by his throat. Donnie didn’t care that he couldn’t breathe. 

Donnie had succeeded, and that was enough for him. The rest was up to the family. As long as they did what they’d always done, stayed hidden, then they would be okay. They wouldn’t come for him, they couldn’t. 

And Shredder couldn’t use Donnie to find them anymore. 

Shredder was yelling, but Donnie wasn’t listening. He relaxed his aching body, the edges of his vision blurring as he lost oxygen. 

Shredder dropped him, and Donnie landed on his bad ankle, no longer holding back any cries. He sat there a moment, his leg pulsing in pain, before shifting so he was sitting on his knees, his hands pressed against the concrete to keep himself propped up. His stomach roiled, reminding him just how fucked he was. 

He hadn’t eaten in days, barely got any water, and was beaten black and blue. 

Come to think of it, how was he still alive?

Donnie pondered the question, his sluggish mind cranking rusted gears.

He didn’t feel the need to fight anymore. He’d given all he had. He didn’t feel scared, or angry, or upset about any of it. He felt an overwhelming sense of satisfaction as the Shredder continued yelling, asking him questions that Donnie ignored.

Donnie refused to say anything else as Shredder lifted his chin with his blade.

He was going to kill Donnie. 

Donnie considered saying something, but decided against it. If he was going to die, then he’d rather his last words be what he said to Leo. He wouldn’t waste them on the Shredder's unforgiving ears. He could tell in the way Mikey seemed so distressed, in Raph’s anger, and in Leo's comforting words that they loved him too. 

He felt an ache in his chest, a single, last longing cry. He wanted to see them again, to hug them. He’d locked himself in his lab the last couple days they’d been together. He’d shut them out in the name of curiosity. He wished he hadn’t passed up as many offers to join Mikey’s movie nights, that he’d dragged Raph into more bike repairs, or let Leo mother him every once in a while. 

“You have tried my last nerve.” Shredder pressed the blade into the underside of Donnie’s chin. “And now you will pay the price.”

Donnie looked at him with calm, apathetic eyes. He took a quiet breath and closed his eyes, leaning a bit into the blade as an invitation.

Donnie could feel Shredder's annoyed hesitance at his sudden lack of defiance. 

He didn’t care. They were safe. 

And just as the blades began to break skin, a guard interrupted, pulling Shredder aside. Shredder seemed unhappy about the intervention, and spoke angrily toward the guard. 

Donnie didn’t listen. 

He was patient, not moving. He kept his chin up, neck wide open and eyes closed. He felt a warm trickling of blood run down his skin slowly from where Shredders blades had been before. 

Leo’s words echoed in his head. 

We’re all okay. We’re safe.

Everything's going to be okay.

You don’t have to apologize.

Donnie smiled a bit, content. 

Then the Shredder had to do what he did best: Shred.

And he shredded Donnie’s safe bubble of satisfaction to pieces with five words.

“Your brothers have been found.”

Donnie opened his eyes, and his smile fell as he looked at the enemy. Shredder had a malicious grin on his face as he leaned closer. “You will still work well as a part in your family’s death.” He tilted his head to the side, observing Donnie. “Though your little stunt will not go unpunished.”

Donnie’s body went cold. Not from fear, he wasn’t afraid of Shredder, nor from dread. 

Donnie felt an underwhelming sense of nothing. 

No reaction, just another dull ache in his chest as everything crashed down around him,

Shredder stayed still and quiet for a moment, considering something of his own as Donnie processed. 

And when it hit Donnie that everything he’d done had been for nothing, he wanted nothing more than for Shredder to kill him right then and there. Maybe that was what he wanted all along. Dead bait is a lot less effective. 

But Donnie still did not move, silent tears running down his face without any recognition from their owner. His head fell slightly, but not enough for him to notice.

Shredder stood, looking down at the broken turtle. “Your tongue is not necessary any longer.”

The words went in one ear and out the other, as Donnie stared at the ground. His rumbling grief was all-consuming. It gnawed at the very core of his being, restricting all other cohesive actions as one thought circled through his unusually empty mind. 

I failed.

Chapter Text

Mikey stood with his brothers, his sensei in front of him. He looked at the building before them, built several miles out of town. It was a japanese-style house, straight out of one of Splinter’s stories. Surrounding them was a small wooded area with thick under-brush. It was a full moon, and out here, the smog was thin enough to allow the moon to be seen.

This was about Splinter, because of course it was. Shredder was the pettiest man alive.

And Shredder was standing in front of the house, his hands behind his back.

He was alone. 

Mikey clenched his fists, scanning the area thoroughly, searching for a hint of purple fabric or olive skin. Where was Donnie?

Splinter stepped forward, placing his hands behind his back just as his enemy was. “Saki, where is Donatello?”

Shredder was quiet for a moment, relishing in the suspense. “He’s inside.” he motioned his head back toward the house. “Recognize it, old friend?”

Splinter’s ears folded down slightly. “Of course I do, but I did not come here to play games. Return my son to me.”

Mikey stood stock-still. He didn’t dare to move, or even blink half the time. The tension alone was heavy enough to crush him. 

Donnie was in that building. He was RIGHT THERE. Mikey could feel it, he knew Shredder wasn’t lying. Mikey desperately wanted to run to the house and get his brother, but Shredder was in the way, and Mikey would do very little good to his big brother if he was dead. 

Shredder shifted, drawing his sword. Splinter did the same, wielding his staff. Mikey felt Leo’s hand wrap around his wrist, pulling him more behind the group. “Hamato Yoshi. You once lost almost everything in a place like this.”

Ah, so that’s what it was. This house was designed to look like Splinters house in Japan. 

“Allow me to finish the job.”

And Shredder charged.

Splinter crouched, and yelled back. “Leonardo, it is you who is responsible for saving your brother. No matter what happens, you bring him home.”

Leo nodded, releasing Mikey, and drawing his katana as Splinter shot forward, engaging in combat with Shredder. 

“You fool! None of you will leave this place alive.”

Foot bots and ninja began bleeding out of the forest like the clearing was an open wound.

And the brothers joined the fray. Leo told them to keep the ninja and bots away from Splinter, that he had his hands full. Mikey gave it his all, digging into his reserves as much as possible. He pulled all the moves out to thin the crowd as much and as quickly as possible. The battle was null in the grand plan. They needed to finish and get Donnie. 

Mikey swiveled when a bot went for his shell, and he cut its head off. He looked past it, toward the house. Donnie was in there, that was where he needed to be. 

He saw a flash of light arching over his head, and before he could register what it was, it hit the house. 

And the walls began to catch fire. 

Donnie was in there.

DONNIE WAS IN THERE!

“NO!” Mikey shouted, getting the oldest turtle's attention.

“DONNIE!” Leo became a blur of green and blue, charging toward the house, cutting down anything that got in his way. 

Mikey knocked down more soldiers, bringing out his kusarigama to stop any fighter that was attempting to follow Leo. 

Leo disappeared into the rapidly growing fire, and Mikey diverted his attention to the battle. Leo could get Donnie, they had to deal with this out here.  

They wouldn’t lose, they couldn’t

Chapter Text

He needed to think.

He smelled the smoke first and tried to look around the dark space as much as he could. 

He needed to get out. 

There were metal cuffs pinning his arms behind his back, around a pole. The pole was soldered to the ground, along with a chain that linked to the cuffs. It was a pretty impossible escape. 

Donnie saw some light, briefly flickering past the half-closed door to the room and down the hall. 

Fire. 

Donnie took a deep breath in, the smoke smell increasing steadily. 

Shit.

Donnie pulled at the cuffs again, hoping for even an inch of space to move. How would he get out with his leg injury if he could get free of them? He was faintly aware of the heat in his ankle and possible infection. 

It hurt… everything hurt. 

Donnie huffed, allowing his head to hang for a moment. He needed to conserve energy, he knew that. But the fire was getting closer at an alarming rate and he could hear boards begin to shift and creak under the growing heat. 

“Donnie?”

The voice slipped through his ears for a moment before it was processed.

“Donnie! Where are you?” it called again.

Donnie strained on the cuffs again. 

Damnit, they came. Of course, they came. 

“Donnie! Say something!”

Leo…

Donnie opened his mouth slowly, waves of pain shooting through his jaw and throat. He couldn’t speak, he knew that. 

So he let out a long whine, and Leo’s voice went quiet for a moment, trying to pinpoint where he was. 

The fire was in full view, eating away at the edges of the door as the room was flooded with thick black smoke that made Donnie’s eyes water. He inhaled the smoke and stifled a cough, feeling it burn at his lungs, adding another thing to the already long list of pain in his body. 

“Donnie!” Leo was closer this time, but Donnie couldn’t see him yet. 

And then it didn’t matter. It didn’t matter how hard Donnie had tried to keep them away, to keep them safe. It didn’t matter that he had failed because they were here, and they were here for him. 

And there were no words grand enough to explain how badly he wanted them.

The ceiling over the room creaked as the flames grew closer to Donnie, slow enough to tease him, but fast enough to worry him. 

He cried out again and fell into a coughing fit that brought tears to his eyes. 

It hurts, it hurts, it hurts, it hurts…

“Donnie!” Leo’s voice was so close. He was SO CLOSE.

Then Leo was there, his hands whisking over Donnie’s body carefully and his eyes locking with Donnie's.

“Donnie, hey, it’s going to be okay, just hang on, alright?” Leo moved around behind him to work on the cuffs, after a second of silence, he slammed one of his katana blades into the chain, effectively breaking it at its weakest point. 

Donnie held back more coughing, bringing his elbow up to meet his mouth. Leo returned to kneeling in front of him, setting his hands carefully on either shoulder. “Dee, can you walk?”

Donnie shook his head, shifting slightly to bring his legs out from under him and letting Leo inspect the wound. 

A cracking sound in the ceiling brought them both back to reality. They were in a burning building and their first priority needed to be getting out. 

“I guess we have to try anyway,” Leo said, offering his hands to help Donnie up. Donnie stood only on his good leg, wobbling for a second as he grew dizzy. “Good, let me help.” Leo encouraged as he maneuvered Donnie’s arm around his shoulders. 

Donnie leaned heavily on Leo as they stood directly in the layer of smoke. Leo paused for a second. “We can’t go back that way, it’s too dangerous.” He looked around for a moment as Donnie tried to breathe lightly. His head was still spinning and gravity seemed to be trying its hardest to reclaim him. 

He nearly fell forward, but Leo caught him. “Woah, hang on, Donnie, stay with me.” He began leading Donnie farther back into the room, drawing one of his swords. They were facing a flaming wall.

Leo swung his sword, shifted a bit, and kicked at the wall, opening a wide space to crawl through. After a couple more kicks, the hole was big enough for both of them.

As they climbed through, the smoke followed, billowing out into the night air. They got a good distance away from the building before Donnie nearly fell again, and Leo eased him down onto the grass. 

“Alright, let me look at you.” Leo pulled out a flashlight and turned it on. He checked Donnie’s arms first, then his legs. 

As he worked, Donnie felt several waves of exhaustion wash over him. He relaxed at the light, comforting touch of his oldest brother.

And despite unheard protests, Donnie drifted off to sleep.

Chapter Text

Leo panicked when Donnie slumped forward. 

Leo caught his shoulders, and laid him on his side. “Dee?” 

He didn’t respond. Come to think of it, he hadn’t said a word since Leo found him.

Leo looked around. He was behind the house now, and couldn’t see his family; he could faintly hear the fight, but wasn’t sure how close they were to finishing.

He wasn’t going to leave Donnie. 

His eyes scanned over Donnie’s body. He was hurt, that was for sure, but Leo had no idea how much was internal. The most notable was the deep laceration through his lower leg and ankle. All of his cuts were irritated and a couple showed signs of infection. There were also circular burn marks on various parts of his body, including a larger spot on the side of his neck. 

Leo huffed. They fucking BRANDED him. 

That brought him to the genius’s face. His jaw and throat seemed to be swelling a bit, his cheeks bruised an off-green color. Leo carefully lifted his head, checking to see if his jaw was dislocated. Donnie whined quietly, but the bone seemed to be in place just fine. 

So what the hell was swelling?

Leo hesitated for a moment, before gently opening Donnie’s mouth. He needed to check to see if Donnie was poisoned or something. 

Leo took a deep breath in, quickly setting his brother's head back down and turning to his leg. That was his priority. He wouldn’t think about that. 

That… that monster-

Shredder had severely burned Donnie’s tongue.

Leo huffed, pulling some materials out from his pouch and setting them out on the grass. He cleaned the leg wound as best he could, wrapping it with some gauze. It would need stitches, but that had to wait till they got home. Leo was more worried about the muscle and nerve damage that he may not be able to help with. Would Donnie need a brace? Would he even be able to walk again?

Leo took a deep breath in, attending to any other injuries he could. He bumped into Donnie’s plastron, which raised a groan from the turtle. That could have been a sign of broken ribs. He noticed that one of Donnie’s hands was wrapped and his fingers were set. Had they been broken? That was the only sign of bandaging on him. 

Leo didn’t know if he was feeling anger or despair. All of this was his fault. If he hadn’t misstepped and fell down the sewer, or if he hadn’t led Donnie to the sewers in the first place, maybe he would be okay.

Maybe he’d be safe.

“Leo!” 

He looked up to see Raph and Mikey running toward him. 

“Donnie!” Mikey ran ahead of Raph upon seeing his brother. He slid on the ground to stop beside Donnie and set his hand on his shoulder. “Is he okay?” He looked up at Leo.

Leo scrunched his nose up a bit. “Okay is relative.”

“What?!” Raph nearly shouted, kneeling by Donnie’s head. 

“He spent a week and a half with the Shredder.” Leo pointed out. “He’s hurt. We need to get him home.”

“On it!” Mikey scooped Donnie up bridal-style without skipping a beat. 

Leo helped shift Donnie’s head so it rested against Mikey’s shoulder, and pulled his arms up onto his plastron. “All  right. Where’s Sensei?”

“He knocked Shredder out. You shoulda seen it.” Raph explained. “He went to get the Shellraiser from where we parked it.”

“Good.” Leo led his brothers around the house and past the littered unconscious foot ninja and broken robot remains. 

The Shellraiser drove up within minutes and Splinter ordered his sons to get in. they had no reason to protest, setting Donnie on some pillows on the floor. Leo checked his pulse, and was greeted by a strong heartbeat.

He sat back. Raph had Donnie’s head lying on his lap, and Mikey was sitting in Donnie’s usual chair with his knees pulled to his chest and his eyes locked on the sleeping brother. 

All of them seemed to be watching Donnie like he would disappear if they didn’t. 

When they all got home, they got Donnie into the medbay, lying him down on a bed. Splinter left to prepare some of the healing mantras and Leo did his best to clean Donnie up more. He knew how to do stitches, and he set up an IV bag. 

Then he paused. 

“We don't have any painkillers.” He realized aloud. 

Mikey looked up at him from his seat beside Donnie’s bed and then at Raph. 

“We’ve got some numbing cream that I can use for the stitches, but he’ll definitely need some painkillers.” Leo pulled out the cream, along with burn gel. He put the  numbing cream first, and added the burn gel and wrapped Donnie’s burns while he waited for it to work. 

Once he was sure the area was numb, he turned ot ask for the stitching kit. 

Raph and Mikey had left. 

“Okay, guess I’ll do it myself.” Leo mumbled to himself. He stitched up Donnie’s leg, and a larger laceration on his arm. The rest of his time was spent making sure Donnie’s fingers were set properly and rewrapped, mumbling soothing words when Donnie stirred, and trying his best to check on his ribs through a plastron and a shell. 

When he was done, he took a step back, looking at his younger brother. He was all wrapped up like a mummy and the only thing left to do was see what he could do about his tongue.

Leo took a deep breath, and got back to work.

Chapter Text

The shock of pain shooting through his body was indescribable. New torment mixed with previous aches stung at the corner of his eyes. 

No, stop-

Donnie flinched away from the hand on his face, his throat and jaw crying out in protest, drawing a pathetic whine from him. 

Please-

“Donnie,” the voice was quiet and soft. “It’s okay. I’m not going to hurt you.”

That… was Leo. 

The recent events came flowing back to him in small waves; the phone call, the fire, and Leo- Leo saved him.

Donnie was safe. He was with Leo. 

He opened his eyes slowly to the harsh lights and hummed a bit, attempting to look at his oldest brother. Leo’s dark blue eyes locked with his as he watched quietly. He had his hands held up with latex gloves that Donnie had made specifically for the turtles. He smiled softly.

“Hey Dee, welcome back.”

Leo-

Donnie took a deep breath through his nose, looking around a bit. He was in the medbay of the lair?

But Shredder knew where the lair was. Was this more of his dumb game? Did he bring Leo here to give Donnie a false sense of security?

Donnie tried to sit up, but his whole body screamed in protest and he grunted. 

Leo pressed his arm to Donnie’s plastron. “Donnie, calm down. It’s okay.”

But Shredder-

Leo remained calm while Donnie panicked. He laid back down, taking as deep of breaths as he could, but his mind raced, still covered in a fog that didn’t quite let him believe his concerns were coherent. 

Donnie closed his eyes, attempting to sink back into the pillow before Leo spoke again. 

“Donnie,” the younger one turned to look at him. “I need to check on your tongue.”

Donnie cringed. Shaking his head slowly, Donnie hovered a hand over his mouth to cover it up. The shooting pain stopped when he kept it still and relaxed, leaving only a matching ache to the rest of his body.

Leo huffed. “Dee, please. We don’t want it getting infected. I’ve already patched the rest of your wounds, but in order for Sensei to let you get some of the healing mantras, we need to make sure it’s clean.”

It was clean! His mouth was still salivating and though he hadn’t brushed his teeth in a few days, he was sure it would be fine, right? 

Donnie huffed, giving in. 

That didn’t mean that the process didn’t shed a few painful tears. 

God, he just wanted the pain to stop. 

When Leo was done and had stepped back, Donnie tried his hardest to relax into the bed, but between his mind and body, anything past laying there semi-stiffly was impossible. 

“We’re back!” He heard the voice from the entrance to the room and looked over slowly to see Mikey and Raph. Raph was holding up a plastic sack, and Mikey was standing behind him, fiddling nervously. 

“Where’d you go?” Leo asked, putting away some of the things he’d used.

“We got a little something to help.” Raph walked over to Donnie and grabbed the IV bag, pulling a vial out of the sack. He dispersed the liquid into the tube and Donnie watched, confused. 

“Donnie, you’re awake!” Mikey appeared on the other side, holding Donnie’s not-broken hand. 

“What is that?” Leo asked, peering around Raph.

“Painkillers,” Raph responded calmly, disposing of the vial and setting the rest in the mini-fridge that was over by the counter. “You said you needed some.”

“And where did you get them?” Leo raised a brow suspiciously.

“A grocery store,” Raph replied sarcastically. “Where do you think, fearless?”

Leo crossed his arms skeptically. “Did you steal them?”

“Are you going to scold me if I answer that honestly?” 

Leo looked at Donnie for a moment, as the purple-clad turtle felt a chill run up his arm from the IV. 

Everyone was silent as Donnie felt the aching subside, leaving him feeling fuzzy as he visibly relaxed. 

Leo huffed. “No. I guess not.”

“Oh, thank god.” Mikey sighed. 

Splinter entered the room, walking over to the bed and locking eyes with Donnie. 

“My son,” He set his hand on Donnie’s forehead. “I am glad you have returned.”

“Are the mantras ready, Sensei?” Leo asked. 

Splinter nodded. “Did Donatello not build this bed to roll and collapse? Perhaps we can move it into the Dojo.”

Mikey disappeared below Donnie's bed, and out of his line of sight. “I know how to do it!”

There was a clank, then he popped back up. “The wheels are unlocked.”

Donnie was moved to the Dojo as the drugs kicked into high gear, fully numbing his body and silencing his thoughts. 

Splinter ordered all but Leo to leave, requesting that the oldest ensure that Donnie remained conscious and responsive until he was done. 

The mantras shifted through Donnie’s ears in a constant solid rhythm, and every time Splinter set his hands down on a part of Donnie’s body, he felt like some sort of pressure was lifted from that limb. 

During the last mantra, Splinter gently put his hands on either side of Donnie’s face, and the turtle tensed, feeling a bit of an ache return to his mouth. 

After he was done, Donnie felt exhausted. He laid back on the bed, closing his eyes. He didn’t notice he’d been moved back to the medbay until he woke up several hours later, as the medicine wore off. His mouth and leg hurt more than everything else, and Donnie pondered whether he’d be able to walk again. 

At least his hand was feeling better already. Hopefully, he could work in his lab again soon. 

Hopefully everything could go back to normal again soon.

Chapter Text

Donnie rolled his shoulders a bit, before stretching some more. He knew the physical therapy was necessary, but that didn’t make it any easier, or less sore. 

Raph stretched beside him, leading the exercise quietly. He kept a careful eye on Donnie without being too overbearing. Donnie was grateful for him. Once they were done stretching, Leo and Mikey entered, along with Splinter, and they all began their training session for the day. 

Donnie sat and watched, leaning back against the wall and bending the knee on his still-healing leg. There was a metal brace he made with Leo’s help attached to it to keep the muscles and joints in place while it healed. He had been able to get up and start ‘walking’ around about a week ago. By walking, he meant hobbling with Leo’s old crutch from the farmhouse. 

His tongue was doing better, healing the fastest out of his major injuries. Then again, the tongue is the fastest healing muscle in the body. He hadn’t been able to really talk yet, still having to relearn how to move his tongue for the words. He’d been working on it in his free time, and was close, but wanted to surprise his family with it later.

When training ended, he moved to the kitchen while Mikey made lunch. 

When that was over, he stood in the living room for a moment. He stared longingly at the doors to his lab. He wanted desperately to do something with his hands, but he was banned from the room until his fingers healed, despite his sound argument of the injured hand not being his dominant one. 

He huffed, noticing that Mikey was intensely focused on the television. Raph and Leo were nowhere to be seen.

So, Donnie hobbled quietly toward his lab.

“What’cha doin?” he looked to his right to see Leo standing by the hall, leaning against the wall watching him.

Donnie frowned, and Leo smirked, stifling a laugh. 

“Sorry, Don.” He stepped past Donnie and opened the lab door, holding it open as he looked back at Don. “you comin?”

Donnie narrowed his eyes suspiciously at his oldest brother. Was he planning on scolding him? Donnie followed him into the room, closing the door behind him and pulling a second chair over to the desk, motioning for Donnie to sit in his usual rolling chair. 

Donnie was a bit confused, but complied, happy to get off his aching foot. 

Leo turned on the computer, then looked at Donnie. 

“What is it you were hoping to get done today?” He asked. 

Donnie set his left hand on the desk, looking at the screen before motioning for the laptop. 

Leo raised a brow, but surprisingly handed over the laptop without a word. Donnie one-handedly opened it and typed out a reply on a new document, 

Leo read it. “Oh yeah, I forgot you were doing that.” He thought for a moment before looking at Donnie again. “You said you didn’t have much left to do.”

Ah, yes. He did say that back when he was half-delirious with a fever. 

They hadn’t seen tooth or nail of any of the Foot in the several weeks since Donnie was rescued. He wondered if they were formulating some new plan, and the family also had their doubts. They’d all started packing their belongings and moving them to a new location that Mikey stumbled upon while exploring the sewers. 

He opened up the code, considering finishing it. 

The idea seemed useless now, incapable of keeping him up for several days. He would have to transfer much of his security to the new lair, but that would be relatively easy as long as he could track down all his sensors. 

Then, he’d have to go from there.

All the family could do now was take things one step at a time. 

Donnie sighed, closing the laptop and leaning back in his chair. He put his left elbow over his eyes.

Leo shifted, “hey Donnie?”

Donnie hummed.

“Are you okay?”

Donnie removed his arm, turning his head to look at his brother. 

He considered the question for a moment, but came up blank, shrugging. He’d been better, sure. But he was home and he was safe. 

Leo nodded. "Is there anything I can do to help?"

Donnie smiled softly, as much as he could. He remembered Leo asking that exact thing in this similar situation several weeks ago, before everything happened. 

Donnie was closest to Mikey, sure, but Leo was the only one that got close to understanding him and how he thought. Mikey and Raph were both more emotionally driven than he, and couldn’t give him the logical standpoint he needed on emotional topics.

But Leo could. 

Donnie shook his head. 

He heard Leo shift again, and turned to look at his oldest brother. 

Leo had pulled his shoulders up to his ears. He was sitting criss-crossed, not very Leo-like unless he was watching Space Heroes. His face was drawn up, holding something back.

Donnie looked at him worriedly, setting his hand on Leo’s knee. 

Leo looked up at him, and tensed, taking a sharp breath in. “Donnie-” he huffed, running one of his hands over his head. “I’m so sorry. I was careless when I led you into the sewers, and when I fell into the water. I couldn’t-” He swallowed, reopening his mouth to continue before Donnie cut him off. 

Donnie gripped the table with both hands, ignoring the pain in his fingers to roll himself closer to Leo and wrap his arms around him. 

Leo tensed for a moment, then relaxed into Donnie’s grip, burying his face into the bandages on Donnie’s shoulder. “‘M sorry, ‘m sorry.”

Donnie shook his head, churring softly, and running his fingers in circles on Leo’s shell. He held him there for a few moments, until Leo’s breathing had evened out. 

“Dee,” Leo raised his head to rest his chin on Donnie’s shoulder instead. “When we were talking on the phone, you kept apologizing, and told me to tell them you loved them.”

Yes, Donnie remembered that, his last ditch effort to protect his family.

He should have known they’d be too stubborn to back down.

“You made sure we were okay, and tried to comfort us.” Leo began rubbing his own circles on Don’s shell. He liked the position, where neither had to look at each other, but they were still there, and could still talk. Donnie sank a little more into Leo. 

Leo hesitated for a moment, before continuing. 

“Donnie, were you ready to die? Would you have rathered Shredder kill you than lead us into a trap?”

Donnie pulled back at the question, startling Leo, who looked at him with a sad look that searched his face for the answer. 

Leo pressed his lips into a thin line, most likely reading the blatant response on Donnie’s face. 

But he didn’t scold Donnie. He didn’t yell, or cry, or fight. 

He just held Donnies hand and looked at it. 

“I’d be a hypocrite if I told you never to do that again, huh?”

Donnie almost laughed, and nodded. 

Leo smiled softly. “Can I ask you to try? Try not to scare the hell out of us again?”

Donnie nodded, returning the smile, and feeling Leo rub his thumb over the back of Donnie’s hand for another silent moment. 

Leo held his arms out again. “One more hug?”

Donnie complied and nuzzled into his big brother's warmth. 

“Love ya Dee. “

Donnie figured now was as good a time as any to put his practice to good use. 

So, with a raspy, struggling, quiet voice, he replied. 

“I love you too, Leo.”