Chapter Text
Today had been just like any other day - he's spent most of it patrolling while occasionally checking in with Best Jeanist back at the agency. Choosing to intern there a 3rd year in a row has done nothing but good for him so far. But during his midday patrol, a minor car accident had occurred nearby and Katsuki rushed to the scene. He handled the situation fairly swiftly and everyone came out practically unscathed, aside from a woman who had approached Katsuki babbling something about her quirk bringing reality to unknown desires. She apologised profusely - for what, Katsuki didn't know - and since she was uninjured he waved her off in the hopes of getting on with his day.
Now, a mere few minutes after the incident had been resolved, Katsuki stands face to face with a little girl who is grinning wildly at him. She looks to be about 3 years old, if that. His hero instincts kick in and he kneels down in front of her, a somewhat friendly smile across his face. "Hey, kid. Where's your parents?" She frowns and then shrugs, shaking her head. She almost loses her balance at the action and outstretches her arms at her sides to steady herself. Once she's stilled, she points her right index finger towards Katsuki.
Huh?
/What is that supposed to mean?/ he wonders to himself.
It's then that he takes the time to actually examine her features. The first thing he notices are her eyes - big and round, vibrantly scarlet. His gaze then drifts to her hair which is messily tousled around on her head, the blond curls pointing every which way. Finally his eyes land on the array of freckles scattered all over her face that trail down to her arms and legs. For only a moment, Izuku crosses his mind. He shakes that thought away.
"What's your name?" he asks this time. Again, she silently shrugs. With how young she looks, Katsuki considers the possibility that she hasn't learned how to speak yet. Although something about this feels... off, he's not sure why.
Abruptly, the girl lunges forward in an attempt to hug him but steps on her shoelace and falls forward with a yelp. Katsuki also reaches out to catch her, however despite his effort she still scrapes a knee. He curses under his breath as her eyes well up with fat tears and she starts sniffling. "Hey, hey. I've got you," Katsuki says as softly as he can while reaching into his pocket for a plaster, "I know it hurts, but you gotta be strong for me okay?" He sets the girl down onto the concrete sidewalk while she quietly cries, nodding her head at his words. It was a minor scrape - barely broke the skin - but he knows well that something as simple as a plaster can reassure a kid better than words.
He gently dusts the dirt off of her knee and presses the plaster to the scrape, internally frowning at the way she winces. Once it's on, he rakes his fingers through her hair with a grin. "See? All better. Strong girl." She sniffles again and wipes her tears with a wobbly smile, humming at him.
As Katsuki looks at her, he's suddenly reminded of himself when he was younger. It doesn't help that she looks so eerily similar to him.
/Wait/.
Katsuki thinks back to that woman from before, thinks about how panicked she had been and what she had said about her quirk.
/A quirk that makes unknown desires become real?/ he ponders for a moment, hand still resting on the girl's head, /if that's true, and she was apologising to me.../. His eyes widen and dart across each of the girl's features. /Messy blond hair, red eyes.../ he pictures her smile from when he first saw her and the way her gums showed through it. His head starts to spin a little. Katsuki had never thought about having kids, at least not actively. Sure, it occasionally crosses his mind whenever watching cheesy romcoms with Mina or when his mother makes a joke about wanting grandkids. But it really only ever sticks around for a moment before he decides he doesn't want to think too hard about those kinds of things.
That's when the realisation hits him. It's not that he doesn't want to think about having kids, it's that he knows it's not possible. No matter how badly he might want a child of his own in the future, being gay almost entirely cuts out the possibility of biological children. His chest feels like it's aching when he looks down at the still teary-eyed kid in front of him. /Unknown desires becoming reality.../
Wait a second...
Oh no.
It takes a second to settle in his head as he comprehends what this means. Katsuki wants kids. He always has. And now, well, he has one.
/Having a kid is my unknown desire?!/
The walk back to Best Jeanist's agency is a quiet one.
Katsuki holds the little girl in his arms against his chest, his hands clasping around her tiny waist as she mumbles incoherent things against his shoulder. She doesn't even know how to talk yet but she somehow still can't shut up - again, Izuku comes to mind. He sighs.
Once they finally reach the agency doors, Katsuki feels the nerves begin to build in his chest. They enter. Her small fingers reach around his neck and begin fiddling with the collar of his hero costume while she continues making little noises. He gives a nod to the receptionist before heading towards the elevator, biting his lip anxiously as he presses the "5" button. He feels the girl's nose smushed against his shoulder and almost chuckles. The elevator doors open in a mere 10 seconds and he's greeted by the site of a few sidekicks chatting in the halls. One sidekick gives him a grin and thumbs up as he steps out while the others acknowledge him with waves and small smiles. He nods back.
The site of Jeanist's office doors send a pang of anxiety through Katsuki's whole body, stopping him in his tracks. /Fuck/, he thinks, /what the fuck am I even going to say to him?/
/Hey your most promising hero-in-training potentially has a child now! Surprise!/
Jesus Christ.
He subconsciously begins running his fingers up and down the girl's back to ease his own nerves, letting one hand go of her to knock on the office door. Jeanist answers almost immediately. "Come in."
/Oh god, oh fuck/.
Katsuki turns the door handle and steps inside, still rubbing her back nervously. His head spins when Jeanist turns to look at him from where he's sat at his desk. Paperwork is sprawled out in front of him in stacks somewhat messily, surprisingly enough. The man gives him a two finger wave once he realises who entered, then raises his eyebrow as he examines the situation further. "Hello, Bakugou. Why is there a child in your arms?" To be fair, Katsuki would be asking the same thing if the roles were reversed - usually lost children get dropped off at the lost and found office on the first floor.
"Hey," he says back, biting back the rising sensation of nausea. "Do you, uh, do— fuck."
Jeanist again raises his eyebrows at how Katsuki stumbles over his words, an extremely rare occurrence.
"DNA test," he eventually says, averting his carmine eyes as his grip slightly tightens on the fabric of the girl's dress, "Where can I get one?"
A silence falls over the room for a moment. He almost wishes the void would come and swallow him whole right this second. Finally, the Pro Hero speaks again. "Yes, I can call lost and found to bring a kit up if you'd like." The blonde nods without a word, trying to look at anything but his mentor. He finds his way to one of the many couches and takes a seat, adjusting the little girl so she's on his lap. She rests her head in the crook of his neck with a contented sigh.
/Please, for the love of god, don't ask me anything/.
God is not on his side today.
"Bakugou. What is the DNA test for?" Jeanist questions, his hand hovering over the phone on his desk. Katsuki grimaces and stares down at the kid in his lap. What is he even supposed to say?
"If I tell you, don't fuckin' laugh at me."
The Pro seems confused but replies anyway. "Of course not." Usually he'd scold him for cursing, but he seems to have picked up on Katsuki's nerves and lets it slide.
"I—okay, fuck, I think she might be, like, related to me," He starts. "She appeared after I had just sorted out an accident nearby and right after a woman had fuckin' bothered me by babbling on about accidentally using her quirk or something. I think she— I dunno, could have been the result of that fucker's quirk and I just need to know for sure because if she is then— then I don't fuckin' know what to do." He takes a deep breath in, rubbing a hand over his face in exasperation. "And, like, this whole thing is stressing me the fuck out because I'm only 18 so how do I even handle this kind of thing? What— what do I do?"
The room goes quiet. Katsuki feels like his chest is caving in on itself and his vision begins to become fuzzy. /A panic attack?/ he thinks almost frantically, clutching his head, /haven't had one of these in years/. Jeanist stands from his desk and crosses the room swiftly, stopping to crouch in front of the hero-in-training. "Hey," he says, gentle, "Breathe. You're strong, kid. And I've got you." He places a reassuring hand on Katsuki's knee.
At the words, Katsuki closes his eyes and focuses on his breathing. It slows a bit to a more normal pace and the room stops spinning. He briefly remembers the last time he'd had a panic attack in front of someone - and the way Aizawa had calmly rubbed circles into his back for god knows how long. A soft smile crosses his lips at the memory.
For the first time in about 10 minutes, the girl shifts in his arms and lifts her head away from his shoulder. She makes a disgruntled noise as she leans back to rub her eyes, blinking mindlessly at Katsuki. Jeanist speaks again. "What're you gonna do if the test comes back and she is yours?" Katsuki's body stiffens at the thought.
Before he can even begin to panic again, the little girl pouts at him and reaches up to lightly pull on a lock of his blond hair. She's still blinking away sleep from her eyes as she does so, pouting even harder when she can't reach his hair. Without thinking, he ducks his head down slightly so she can reach - holding her firmly still so she doesn't wobble off of his lap. The afternoon sunlight that pours in from the office window illuminates her from behind, and Katsuki feels like all the nerves and rigidness are melting from beneath him. "I don't know," he says breathily, feeling her fingers tug at his dead-ends.
"But I don't wanna abandon her."
Once Katsuki and the girl swabbed the insides of their mouths for the DNA test and sent it back, they waited around for a few hours. It was mostly spent in Jeanist's office, but occasionally they got up and walked around the building. However, at no point did Katsuki put her down. He's not sure why, honestly. By the time the DNA test results were being sent back up to the office the sun had already set, and by now he would usually have gone back to the dorms. He makes sure to send Aizawa a message letting him know he'll be late to ensure he doesn't needlessly worry.
Now Katsuki stares at the papers containing the test results in the woman's hands. That sensation of nausea from before rises back up in his throat but he acts like this is no big deal when he takes them from her. He gives her a nod and a swift thanks when she turns and leaves the room. Now that she's gone and it's just Katsuki, his mentor and the girl, he lets out a breath. Screwing his eyes shut, he holds the papers at his side, gritting his teeth. "Fuck, I'm nervous."
Jeanist leans back at his desk, stretching his arms above his head. "You should put her down for this, Bakugou."
/Yeah, he's right/. Glancing over at the couch, he strides over and unlocks her hands from his neck. She lets out a sad whine when he puts her down, pouting again. His heart aches.
"Just a minute, okay?" he whispers quiet enough that he's sure she probably didn't even hear. The room is enveloped in silence for what feels like forever as he prepares himself to look at the results. No one says a word. And when the crumpling sound of paper breaks the stillness, still no one speaks. And when Katsuki's breath hitches loudly as his eyes scatter over the page, still, no one says anything.
It's quiet again.
And then it's not.
"99.99% match."
Although Jeanist had offered to take the girl to give Katsuki at least a night to think over everything, he declined. Giving her away while he decides whether he should abandon her or not feels gross. So instead he goes to the only person he feels he can truly trust in this situation.
"Problem child." Aizawa greets him bluntly from the doorway, exhaustion seeping through his voice. Katsuki doesn't blame him. It's 11pm and they have class tomorrow yet here he is, showing up at the teacher's dorm with a small girl in his arms and a tired look on his face. The scruffy man's hair is tied into a low bun and he looks ready to smash his student's skull at any wrong move, but there's a certain softness behind those eyes. "What's going on."
Katsuki gives him a pleading look, afraid that if he speaks yet he might break. Aizawa sighs dramatically. "Come in."
Once they're situated with Katsuki on one couch his teacher on the other across from them, he decides to just drop the bomb. He's already fucked anyways, might as well get the hard part over with first. "She's mine."
Aizawa raises a brow.
"Do I—" he tries to ignore how his voice cracks with desperation, "are you gonna make me say it?" He gestures to the small blonde girl sitting on his left, idly fiddling with Katsuki's fingers that lay in her lap. "She's my, fuck, she's my daughter." He stares into his teacher's face, watching, waiting for any hint of disgust or horror or anger at the news. But it never comes. Instead, the man just nods slowly.
"Okay."
"O—okay?"
He nods again, "Okay." The kindest look in his eyes, he leans forward to rest his elbows on his knees. "Wanna talk about it?"
/What?/
Before Katsuki can even realise what's happening, the room goes blurry with salty tears pouring down his cheeks. He feels like the whole world was just lifted from atop his shoulders. Shakily, he reaches up to clutch at the fabric of his shirt against his chest, letting out a choked sob. All his walls come crashing down around him and he can no longer do anything but accept it. "C'mere," a distant voice says, pulling him into an embrace. It's warm. He can't remember the last time he's ever cried like this in front of someone other than Izuku. But instead of worrying about that, he lets it all spill out. He rambles on and on about how scared he is, and Aizawa sits silently. Just like back in first year, he rubs soothing circles onto Katsuki's back until his breathing is even.
He's not sure how long they stayed like that, in all honesty. Though, by the end of it, he notices that his daughter is mimicking his teacher - rubbing little circles with her fingers on top of his knee while staring innocently at the scene. He almost chokes back up at the action.
When they pull away from the hug, Katsuki looks over at the little girl and begins to explain what had happened that day. Aizawa listens carefully, nodding here and there to ensure him he's heard him. Once the explanation is over, the three just let the information settle in for a while. The blond reaches his hand to card his fingers through his daughter's hair, noticing the sleepy look on her face. Eventually, Aizawa talks again. Katsuki is not sure what he expected him to say, but it definitely wasn't the words that next left his mouth.
"What're you gonna name her?"
A beat.
"Huh?"
The man rolls his shoulders back, jutting out his chin as a way to gesture towards the girl. "Have you thought of a name yet?"
Immediately, one comes to mind. He feels the tips of his ears burn at the realisation of what it is. Averting his eyes, Katsuki nods. It's one he'd heard many years ago when he himself was just a kid. The memory plays so vividly in his head, even after all this time. Little Katsuki butting into a conversation his mother and Mrs Midoriya were having about the naming process, and excitedly asking his friend's mother what she would have named her son if he were a girl. She had smiled, so warmly it makes his head spin even now, and said—
"Izumi." Katsuki whispers, voice cracking with tiredness but a fond expression on his face. "Her name is Izumi."
Aizawa offers Katsuki a room in the teachers' dorm, claiming it's better they stay there for at least a few days while adjusting to each other. He accepts the offer begrudgingly despite how badly he wants to just go back and sleep in his own bed. Izumi is quite tired at this point but her hunger outweighs that problem, so Aizawa cooks up some beef and rice porridge for her to eat before heading to bed. Katsuki rests his head against the cushion on the couch with his eyes closed while they wait, his daughter slightly dozing off beside him. He's got a pounding headache but the pain meds he took don't seem to be doing their job just yet.
"It's almost done," the teacher calls from the kitchen, alerting Katsuki that it's time to get Izumi situated at the table.
Sitting up and yawning dramatically, he pats the blonde girl on the head lightly. "Oi, you still hungry?" She stirs, blinking confusedly at him while processing his words. Then she nods, rubbing her eyes. The hero-in-training hums in response and climbs to his feet so he can pick her up. He wraps his arms around her and lifts her briefly before he himself sits down in one of the many dining chairs. He places her on his lap in one swift motion and as Aizawa sets a bowl down in front of them he makes a mental note to thank him for everything later.
At the smell of the food in front of her, Izumi beams brightly. Katsuki's heart warms. She reaches for the spoon in the bowl but he stops her, "Uh-uh, it's still hot. We gotta be careful." She leans her head back to look up at him, pouting profusely. Her father grabs the spoon himself, taking a small portion of the rice and blowing on it before putting it in his mouth. She gasps at the betrayal but he just laughs, ruffling her hair. "I'm not stealing your dinner, promise! Just making sure it's safe to eat."
Aizawa scoffs loudy from where he's cleaning up in the kitchen, "What, you think I'm gonna poison your kid or somethin'?"
Katsuki snorts. "Maybe, who knows?"
He takes another spoonful and blows lightly on it to cool it down, leaning his hand down and hovering it in front of Izumi's mouth. Immediately, she stop pouting and almost lunges forward to take it into her mouth, which startles the blond. She whines at the fact that it's hot but still chews it like it's her last meal ever. "Woah, slow down, kid." Katsuki says, slightly concerned at how fast she swallowed that mouthful. "You'll choke if you're not careful." Izumi looks up at him and sticks her tongue out indignantly which makes his eyes widen and he clutches at his chest with a dramatic gasp, feigning offense.
Re-entering the room, Aizawa rolls his eyes at the sight. "Like father, like daughter."
The next 20 or so minutes pass by mostly quiet aside from the occasional bit of small talk and babbling from Izumi. Once she's eaten what she can from the bowl, Katsuki finishes the rest to assure it doesn't go to waste. He and Aizawa talk about living and school arrangements for a short while, landing on an agreement of how things are gonna go. "You'll take a few days off school and stay here, spend time with Izumi and build a routine." Aizawa says, staring blankly at his student. "If you're planning on raising her from now on, there are going to be sacrifices you'll have to make - school will be one of those sacrifices. You're a top student so it's not that big of a deal, though."
Katsuki grits his teeth but listens - he knows the man is right, but that doesn't make it any less frustrating.
"Another thing is your social life," Aizawa continues, "I assume you're gonna want to keep her a secret for a while and that's gonna impact how much time you can spend with your friends. You willing to make that sacrifice too?"
Looking down at the little girl in his arms as she drools onto his sleeve, Katsuki lets out a warm breath of air. "Yeah, I am." He says tiredly. "I'm— I'm not sure just how cut out I am to be a— a dad, but... I ain't no coward. Izumi is my responsibility now." The aforementioned girl opens her eyes slightly at the mention of her name, sleepily staring up at her father who wipes her drool with a napkin. He wants to say more; say how attached he already feels to her, say how far he feels he would go to protect her - but he doesn't.
"I'm gonna do this right."
Aizawa nods, a smile tugging at the corners of his lips. "Good. Now go get some sleep, I'll brief some of the other teachers to avoid awkward questions in the morning."
Katsuki pushes his chair back, flipping Izumi around so that she's now leaning against his chest as he stands. It's probably past midnight now and both of them are exhausted. He feels like he might collapse on the spot if he isn't careful. "Thanks. For all of this. Seriously."
"It's no problem, Bakugou." The man also stands, shutting his laptop with a yawn. "There's a spare room down the hall on the right. Oh, and I'll get you some of Eri's old clothes to change her into."
He watches as his teacher leaves the common area and heads towards his own room, assumedly where he keeps his daughter's clothing. Then he looks down at his own daughter, rolling his eyes at the drool dripping out the corner of her mouth again. /She really does remind me of Izuku/. He thinks. /Shut up, don't be fuckin' weird/.
Striding across the room and through the halls as quickly as one can when carrying a small child, Katsuki stops in front of the room he's been given. It looks just like all the other dorms yet somehow feels ten times more intimidating. The nerves start to build up again, but he swallows them down harshly. Aizawa returns with a small t-shirt and shorts that presumably belonged to Eri. They look like they'll fit her just fine. "Night, kid." Katsuki watches him leave from where he stands, holding Izumi tighter. And suddenly he's 12 again, babysitting his little cousin alone on a weekend. He remembers asking his mother what he's supposed to do - how does one take care of a child when they're still one themselves?
18 feels very different from 12. Yet the fear stays the same. Maybe it's a little stronger.
If you were to ask Katsuki about his childhood, he would tell you it wasn’t ideal. Sure, he had lots of money, a powerful quirk and his parents were never actively abusive - but that doesn't mean it was good. If you were to ask him how life was back then, he would tell you that he grew up believing love is weakness. He would tell you that emotions scare him and he's afraid letting people in. He would tell you he's never known what it's like to be seen as more than just a quirk.
If that doesn’t tell you what it was like, I don't know what will.
Regardless, when Katsuki thinks back to when he was a kid, he has very few fond memories with his mother. She isn’t a very kind woman, and never was. Which is quite the contrast to his best friend's mother - he was always envious of Izuku for that reason. Inko Midoriya is a wonderful mother and person - she has always treated Katsuki as if he is her own.
And god he used to dream of getting that from his own mother; that feeling of compassion and understanding. But she could never give it to him. So he sought it out from Izuku’s mother.
And now, at 18, as Katsuki stares down at the small girl - his daughter - in his arms, he envisions his 3-year-old self in her place and pictures Mrs Midoriya in his own. /What would she do?/ he wonders.
Izumi's eyes flutter open and she raises her head to look at her father. Red meets red, and she grins. Katsuki just can’t help but grin back. He's going to love this girl like he never was, and he's gonna make sure she never feels alone.
He is not going to make the same mistakes his mother made.